PaleOMG Uncensored Real Food. Real Life. Real Simple. Thu, 23 Nov 2017 13:37:08 +0000 en-US hourly 1 Juli Bauer is the creator of where she shares her recipes, thoughts, fashion, workouts, travel and really whatever the hell else she wants to. Wait. Am I suppose to talk in the third person in this podcast description? That's weird.<br /> <br /> I'm not here to give you the science behind Paleo or a history lesson. That's boring. Go somewhere else for that. I'm literally here to talk about whatever pops into my mind. Curse words and all. My French bulldog tends to snore in episodes, I'm easily distracted and completely unqualified to have my own podcast, but hey, that's the world we live in. So let's chat about stuff while I snack and slurp on some food. Keeping it professional, just for you guys! PaleOMG Uncensored yes PaleOMG Uncensored (PaleOMG Uncensored) Juli Bauer Says It All PaleOMG Uncensored Interview w/ Sarah from Broma Bakery – Episode 59: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 18 Nov 2017 12:55:34 +0000 0 Today on the podcast, I’m talking to the lovely and hilarious Sarah from Broma Bakery. Sarah has some of the most stunning food photos out there so she’s telling me where she gets her inspiration from, how she comes up […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking to the lovely and hilarious Sarah from Broma Bakery. Sarah has some of the most stunning food photos out there so she’s telling me where she gets her inspiration from, how she comes up with new recipes, and what projects she’s working on nowadays. Sarah will not only wow you with her creativity, but she will keep you laughing on her instagram stories!


 Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 59 Transcription Coming Soon!

Today on the podcast, I’m talking to the lovely and hilarious Sarah from Broma Bakery. Sarah has some of the most stunning food photos out there so she’s telling me where she gets her inspiration from, how she comes up […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking to the lovely and hilarious Sarah from Broma Bakery. Sarah has some of the most stunning food photos out there so she’s telling me where she gets her inspiration from, how she comes up […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:00:48
Favorite Things Right Now – Episode 58: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 11 Nov 2017 14:07:17 +0000 5 Chatting all about my favorite things right now, from skincare to makeup to food to cleaning products!! Links in Podcast: PaleOMG x Four Athletics, Floral Print, High Waist, 7/8 leggings (use code PALEOMG for 10% off) Avex Water Bottle Forager Cashew […] Chatting all about my favorite things right now, from skincare to makeup to food to cleaning products!!

Links in Podcast:


 Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 58 Transcription Coming Soon!

Chatting all about my favorite things right now, from skincare to makeup to food to cleaning products!! Links in Podcast: PaleOMG x Four Athletics, Floral Print, High Waist, 7/8 leggings (use code PALEOMG for 10% off) Avex Water Bottle Forager Cashew […] Chatting all about my favorite things right now, from skincare to makeup to food to cleaning products!! Links in Podcast: PaleOMG x Four Athletics, Floral Print, High Waist, 7/8 leggings (use code PALEOMG for 10% off) Avex Water Bottle Forager Cashew […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 56:52
Interview with Kathleen of Carrie Bradshaw Lied – Episode 57: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 04 Nov 2017 14:08:42 +0000 7 Today on the podcast, I’m talking to one of my favorite people to follow on instagram. Kathleen of Carrie Bradshaw Lied is hilarious, beautiful, intelligent and one badass B. She works hard to produce amazing content on her website every single […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking to one of my favorite people to follow on instagram. Kathleen of Carrie Bradshaw Lied is hilarious, beautiful, intelligent and one badass B. She works hard to produce amazing content on her website every single week and she’s sharing her story with me! From what she did before she started blogging to how she ended up with a three legged cat to how she balances life with an MD husband. She’s seriously the best and was so fun to talk to. Don’t forget to follow Kathleen on her blog and on instagram and all her other social media channels!


 Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 57 Transcription Coming Soon!

Today on the podcast, I’m talking to one of my favorite people to follow on instagram. Kathleen of Carrie Bradshaw Lied is hilarious, beautiful, intelligent and one badass B. She works hard to produce amazing content on her website every single […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking to one of my favorite people to follow on instagram. Kathleen of Carrie Bradshaw Lied is hilarious, beautiful, intelligent and one badass B. She works hard to produce amazing content on her website every single […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:13:22
Interview w/ Sal Di Stefano – Episode 56: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 28 Oct 2017 13:17:51 +0000 11 Today on the podcast I’m chatting with the super cool Sal Di Stefano from Mind Pump. After listening to Joy & Claire from Girls Gone Wod I was super excited to chat with Sal myself and hear a little more about […] Today on the podcast I’m chatting with the super cool Sal Di Stefano from Mind Pump. After listening to Joy & Claire from Girls Gone Wod I was super excited to chat with Sal myself and hear a little more about his own story. If you haven’t listened to Mind Pump yet, they usually share 5 episodes a week so you always have something new to listen to and they share some really cool information about people’s bodies, nutrition and exercise. And they are no bullsh*t kind of guys. I love it! I’m super excited because I’ll be heading to the Mind Pump studio soon to record an episode of their podcast! So stay tuned for that!


 Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 56 Transcription Coming Soon!

Today on the podcast I’m chatting with the super cool Sal Di Stefano from Mind Pump. After listening to Joy & Claire from Girls Gone Wod I was super excited to chat with Sal myself and hear a little more about […] Today on the podcast I’m chatting with the super cool Sal Di Stefano from Mind Pump. After listening to Joy & Claire from Girls Gone Wod I was super excited to chat with Sal myself and hear a little more about […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:14:50
Interview with Miranda Chivers – Episode 55: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 21 Oct 2017 12:59:51 +0000 18 Today on the podcast, I’m talking to CrossFit athlete, coach and previous HQ staff Miranda Chivers. We talk about everything from competing in CrossFit, to her breaking her neck, going through knee surgery and giving birth to her first child…all […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking to CrossFit athlete, coach and previous HQ staff Miranda Chivers. We talk about everything from competing in CrossFit, to her breaking her neck, going through knee surgery and giving birth to her first child…all natural. She cray. Wait until you hear her birth story!


Big Thank You to Our Sponsor – ButcherBox

ButcherBox sources and delivers the best quality grass-fed, grass-finished, antibiotic and hormone-free, pasture-raised beef, chicken and pork straight to your doorstep. And getting your ButcherBox is super easy – just select your box, customize it to your liking, and then set your schedule of how often you want to receive your ButcherBox. They offer free shipping to the contiguous 48 states and each classic box is filled with 8-11 pounds of meat. They also just launched their custom box so customers can actually choose everything that comes in their box! And right now, PaleOMG Uncensored listeners can get $10 off their first order PLUS 2 FREE grass fed, grass finished ribeyes! Click here to receive this special offer!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 55 Transcription!

Well hey there buttercup baby. Welcome to another episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. Before I get started with the amazing Miranda, I’ve got to tell you about something that’s super rad. This month’s sponsor. And this month’s sponsor is something I use daily. Every single day I’m using it. It’s Butcher Box. If you haven’t heard me talk about Butcher Box; come on. Get with the program. Follow me on Instagram, man! I talk about it every single day there. Because it is a product I use every single day. Instead of going to the grocery store and trying to decipher through all the different labels out there nowadays, Butcher Box takes that out of the equation.

They find high quality grass-fed and pastured raised meat, and they source it so you can get it straight to your doorstep. They get the best quality beef, chicken, and pork that is humanely raised, and it’s free of antibiotics and hormones. And then all you have to do is open that box up; everything is frozen, put it in your freezer. And then you can cook it as you go. It’s so easy.

So all you have to do is log onto their website. You just select your box. You customize it to your liking, and then you set your schedule of how often you want to receive your Butcher Box. They offer free shipping to the contiguous 48 states, and each classic box is filled with 8 to 11 pounds of meat. And they also launched their custom box. So customers can actually choose everything that comes in their box. So if you only want chicken, do that. If you only want breakfast sausage; I get it. I love breakfast sausage. I just ordered a ton of breakfast sausage in my next box. You can do that. So you can choose exactly what you want. And say you have an event coming up and you want filet mignon, you can trade those things out. You can add on; it’s awesome.

And right now they’re offering PaleOMG Uncensored listeners an awesome discount. You can get $10 off your first order plus two free grass-fed grass finished ribeyes. That’s all you have to do, go to and figure out what box is perfect for you. Again, that’s And you’ll get $10 off your first order and two free ribeyes. This company is awesome, guys. I’m so lucky to get to work with them. And if you want to support the podcast, and support me, and keep this podcast going, check them out. I promise you’re going to be so happy with them. And now, let’s hear from Miranda.

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: So welcome everyone to PaleOMG Uncensored. Today I have a very special guest. Her name is Miranda. What is your new last name now, Miranda?

Miranda: {laughs} That’s actually a really in-depth question for the first question.

Juli Bauer: I know! {laughing} Well what do you like to go by now.

Miranda: I actually don’t know the answer to that question. I’m just kidding. I was married, and my last name was Oldroyd. That’s still my last name on my driver’s license. I have not changed it because that’s a pain in the ass.

Juli Bauer: Totally.

Miranda: But I don’t go; I don’t know what I go by. My maiden name is Chivers.

Juli Bauer: Ok.

Miranda: Which pretty much anyone that’s known me through CrossFit has never heard that before. So it’s kind of weird right now. I’m just Miranda, like Madonna.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Changing your name is such a pain in the ass. So having to change it again; my mom was married previously, before my dad. And then she changed her name, and then when she got married again, she’s like, I’m not doing that again. So she kept her last name {laughs} and never changed it. Because it’s such a freaking pain.

Miranda: It is. It’s like on everything, and then my website was and my Instagram was Miranda Oldroyd.

Juli Bauer: Totally.

Miranda: So yeah, it’s been fun.

Juli Bauer: Well, I know, that was an in-depth question. But before we get started, I want you to tell everyone kind of who you are, so people who maybe aren’t in the CrossFit space or new to CrossFit or just have no idea. Will you explain who you are, where you came from, kind of how you came into the CrossFit community and how your life is? I know that’s such a broad question.

Miranda: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Just kind of your background, athletic background. Because obviously CrossFit is a huge part of your life, and has been for many years. And before you get into that, I just thought of this. Why I wanted to have you on in the first place. Before I started CrossFit, I was very hesitant. I didn’t want to start. And I remember seeing your picture on, and I was like; I want to be like this chick.

Miranda: Aww.

Juli Bauer: You embodied strength, you embodied confidence, and I wanted to be like that. And you really pushed me into CrossFit, without doing anything. And then we competed together back in, I think it was 2011.

Miranda: It was 2011, because I remember meeting you. Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Yes! And I came up to you, and I was like cheesing out! I was like, “I just want to introduce myself.” I’m like interrupting your warmup.

Miranda: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: I’m like; “You’re the whole reason I started CrossFit!” So yeah. We got to compete against each other back in the day, when I first started. So that’s why I wanted to have you on in the first place. You really brought me into the CrossFit world, which is f*cking cool.

Miranda: Aww. Well now I hit you up to ask you what I should wear, so we’re even.

Juli Bauer: Yes, yes! And now we’re on a texting basis. It’s pretty cool.

Miranda: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: So kind of how did you come into CrossFit? What did you do before CrossFit?

Miranda: I was already a personal trainer before CrossFit. So kind of weird; I went to school for interior design, but then I didn’t end up using it because I was coaching spinning classes and some kickboxing classes and stuff while I was in school, and I ended up just loving that more. So then I went and got a personal trainer certificate, and that’s what I was doing when I found CrossFit.

There were no CrossFit affiliates. I’m from Salt Lake City, Utah, which actually a lot of people think I’m from California, but I’m not. I grew up my whole life living in Utah until 2011. And there were no affiliates; CrossFit affiliates back in 2007 in Salt Lake City where I lived. So I went and got certified, opened a gym. It was the first gym in Salt Lake, CrossFit 801. And then yeah. I found CrossFit just online, literally just searching new ways to train. Because I was bored training people the way that I was, and that’s how I found it. And I did it myself at first, at a Gold’s Gym there in Salt Lake. And then started doing it with my clients, and kind of went from there.

After I opened the gym, I wanted to be on the seminar staff, because that was just the coolest thing ever to do. And so I went and got my level 2 certification through CrossFit, and started coaching on the seminar staff. And did that, actually, until about a year ago.

Juli Bauer: How did you get onto the seminar staff?

Miranda: So {laughs} the process back then was much more loose than it is now.

Juli Bauer: Yes. {laughs} Yeah.

Miranda: Basically they had what was called the level 2 back then, was a performance based test. They watched you coach people, and then gave you a pass/fail based off of that only. And the fail rate was like 80% or something like that at these courses. And basically, if you passed, they would invite you to be on this seminar staff {laughs}.

Juli Bauer: Oh, gotcha.

Miranda: So that’s how that happened. I started traveling; and honestly it’s the coolest thing that I got to do that, because I’ve been all over the world coaching people. I’ve met so many; I know people on every continent because of it. It was awesome. It was really fun.

Juli Bauer: And how many years were you on the seminar staff?

Miranda: I was on the seminar staff for; let’s see 2008; 8 years.

Juli Bauer: Damn, that’s a long time. So how many years have you been doing CrossFit?

Miranda: Since fall 2007. My first CrossFit workout was I think on November 2, so it’s coming up. My 10 years is coming up, yeah.

Juli Bauer: Jeeze. How do you remember that? That’s crazy.

Miranda: Because I’m weirdly sentimental like that. I remember dates and numbers.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. When you first tried CrossFit, were you hooked right away or were you like; eh, I don’t know about this. How did you feel about it when you first started?

Miranda: Julian and I will joke all the time. I’m really bad at doing stuff casually. So I had the same experience you did. I saw the nasty girls video with Anna.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: Annie, Nicole, and Available.

Juli Bauer: Mm-hmm.

Miranda: And I wanted to be like that. I was like; oh man, they’re so badass. They look good, but also look what they can do type of thing. So I was like; I’m going to do this. But I was basically doing the most body builder type training ever at the time. And I wanted to know if CrossFit; because it seemed to me, one workout a day, there was no way I was going to look like that and be fit like that. Because I was from the body building world, right? But I wanted to know if it would work. This idea of high intensity.

So I dropped all of the bodybuilding stuff, altogether, and decided that for one month I was only going to do the workout of the day, and take the rest days. The three on, one off. I sent an email out to all my friends {laughs} and told them that I was going to try this program and I would let them know what I thought, and I was only going to do this program just to see if it would work. Because if I did other stuff on top of it, then who knows. I don’t think I ever ended up emailing people back; they knew I was in love with it. So yeah, that’s how I started.

Juli Bauer: So you were in bodybuilding before. So when you kind of went into the CrossFit space, were you still trying to keep a bodybuilding type physique? Were you in bodybuilding competitions, or was it just the workouts that you did?

Miranda: I did one fitness competition. Juli, I was Miss Fitness Utah in {laughs} I think it was 2001 or, no it was 2002 or 2003.

Juli Bauer: Wow.

Miranda: So. With the whole dance routine and everything.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Oh my gosh!

Miranda: I haven’t competed, and I wasn’t interested in competing anymore in bodybuilding or fitness or figure anything after that, I just did that one time. So it had been four years since I had competed. It’s just still the way that I worked out.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: And what made you love CrossFit so much? What was the main thing?

Miranda: Well I had started working out when I was in high school. So I think by 2007, I’m going to let everyone know how old I am right now. So by 2007, I had been working out regularly for like 8 years. So I was bored of it. And CrossFit was fun. And it crushed me, and I thought I was really fit; because again, I had been working out for 8 years. And I was dead every single time. And you know, as you know, to this day I’m dead every single time. It just made it so much more fun.

Juli Bauer: And then when you were doing CrossFit, when was it that you were like; I want to compete and I want to get to the CrossFit games level?

Miranda: So, that’s so funny because back then there was no, “I’m training for the games!”

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: I missed the 2007 games because I started a couple of months after them. But in 2008, myself and like 30 members of my affiliate drove from Salt Lake to the CrossFit games. And some of us competed. There were like 5 of us that competed; or maybe not even that many. And everybody else just came. No, actually that was 2009 when a bunch of people came. There was only like 10 of us in 2008. And we competed and you just signed up. You didn’t qualify. There was a scaled division. You just signed up, went, and had fun. And I think I placed 20th and I had been doing CrossFit for like less than a year.

And so yeah, that was it. There was just chaos of people doing workouts everywhere. The judging was funny and nobody really cared. And it was awesome. And there was like a big barbecue. And then in 2009 you had to qualify, and that was the first time. But still people weren’t really training for it. You just still did your workout with your class, and then you went. Whatever. I really wanted to go once it was at Home Depot Center is when it seemed more serious. But I didn’t really start altering my training too much until I moved to California, in 2011.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: And before we talk more about the CrossFit games, can you talk about your experience with your car accident? Because you went to the CrossFit games after getting into your car accident and breaking your neck, correct?

Miranda: Mm-hmm.

Juli Bauer: So can you kind of talk about that experience? I just have seen stuff on Instagram of your recovery from that. But what happened throughout that?

Miranda: Yeah. So I had competed at regionals in 2012 which was in May. And I got 7th at regionals; I was always so close yet so far away.

Juli Bauer: Yeah {laughs}.

Miranda: {laughs} And then I got in the car accident on June 30th, so like a month after regionals. I was actually working at a seminar here in SoCal when it happened. And I had left during lunch to get coffee for all the trainers, and just never came back. {laughs} The accident happened right in front of the gym. Basically I was T-boned. I was turning left, and the car was going straight and hit my little rental Chevy Cruze and spun me around a couple of times. I ended up; I broke my neck in two places. It’s called a Hangman’s fracture which sounds; it sounds gory so I’ll share it. It basically is like when you hang yourself, the same bones that you will break that paralyze you. That’s what it’s called.

So they took me to the emergency room, obviously, and I had so much adrenaline and the nurse had recognized me. She was a crossfitter {laughs} and she was like, oh my gosh this is awesome! And I was just like, what? I kind of went into joking around, my adrenaline is high, I don’t really feel too much mode. So they ended up not x-raying my neck. Even though I told them it hurt, they were like; oh you just have whiplash. And then kind of gave me a soft collar. My hand was broken too, and they told me I needed to go get a cast on my hand, because they did x-ray my hand.

And then I left. So I had my broken neck, and I left, and went home the next day, and just thought that’s what whiplash felt like. So just, I couldn’t move. I couldn’t brush my teeth. I couldn’t sleep lying down. Nothing. It was really bad. And then the CrossFit games were two weeks after that. And I went; because I was supposed to be. I don’t know if you remember but I used to do sideline reporting, like interviewing the athletes.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: I was supposed to be doing that job, and they were like, you can’t do it. You look ridiculous, you can’t even turn your head. This is distracting {laughs}. So they replaced me in my job, and I was super bummed out by it. So much so that I was like; that’s it, I’m going to loosen up my neck {laughs} so that I can at least move well enough to interview people. I ended up getting my job back at the games and worked.

And when I got home from the games, the doctor who had casted my hand, he was concerned about my neck. Because he felt like it was weird they didn’t x-ray it. So he sent me in for an MRI after the games. And that day, the MRI technician called basically and said, you need to go to the emergency room right now. You’ve been walking around; it was 17 total days from my accident to when this happened. You’ve been walking around with a really unstable fracture in your neck. {laughs} And literally if you trip and fall, if you get even a slight rear end at a red light. So many things, if that thing moves, it’s going to paralyze you. So that was terrifying. I went to the emergency room, and then that night they fused my C2-C3 vertebrae together. So yeah, that’s the story. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: So, was recovery difficult after that? Did you have to take a certain amount of time off of working out? What was recovery like?

Miranda: Oh yeah. So, I had to wear a hard collar. One of the really cheesy ones. Actually, a bunch of people dressed up as me for Halloween that year, which was really funny.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Miranda: With their neck braces and all. And yeah, I had to wear that hard collar and I wasn’t allowed to drive for almost 2 months. But of course, I’ve always been; again, I can’t just do things casually and I have a really hard time sitting still. So I started, a couple of days after I got out of the hospital. I think I stayed two nights in the hospital. I asked them if I could squat; the nurses at the hospital. And they were like, absolutely not! And I was like, I don’t think you know what I mean. So I showed them a couple of air squats, and they were like; oh yeah, that’s fine.

So I started riding the bike just with no hands, because the twisting was still pretty painful. I pulled the sled a lot. I pulled the sled so much. Just putting it around my waist. I did walking lunges, air squats. I had a goal of doing 1000 air squats a week. And then once I got the cast off my hand, there were a few more things I could do. But anything that was explosive; any Olympic lifting, jumping, kipping. Any of that stuff was out for I think 2 to 3 months, at least.

Juli Bauer: Oh wow.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Ok. And then, how long after your accident did you kind of join in with these friends, and then make it to the CrossFit Games?

Miranda: Ok, so the accident was 2012, and I had already started working out with my besties over in NorCal. My little family. And I was like, depressed because I missed them. So I would still go to the gym every day and basically watch them workout from the bike.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: And then I started; when they were doing stuff I could do, I would add it back in. Then in 2013 I competed at regionals again as an individual, and placed 7th, again. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Dammit! That damn 7!

Miranda: I know. Which actually was; I was really surprised and excited about that, that I placed the same as I did before. So that was fine. That was really cool; that was a really fun year. And Molly competed; that was the first year I met Molly, my really close friend up in NorCal. And then the next year, I wasn’t going to compete on the team. I was like, team’s lame. Whatever, you guys are lame. But I didn’t do very good in the Open {laughs}. Honestly, this is true story; you need to just be on the team with us. Let’s be realistic here. So I was like; ok. So 2014 we did the team, and we ended up placing 5th at the Games. That team was a little bit different than the 2015 team that most people know about. There were a few different members. So I had been training with them already, and that’s why we it was so easy to form the teams. Because we were already all together.

Juli Bauer: And then what happened when you were at the CrossFit games?

Miranda: Which time? {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Miranda: In 2014, we had a couple of bad things. But it was fine; we finished and everything. And then in 2015, on Friday, Saturday morning, we were in first place by like 60 points, and we were so psyched on it, but everyone was really messed up. We did the worm deadlifts on the beach that year, and it really messed people up.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: To the point where people were considering dropping out. Like, high ranked teams. Everyone was taped from their calves all the way up to their neck. And we were warming up for the clean and jerk, and people couldn’t even bend over to pick up the bar. And I was really sore. Anyway, the workout was a one-rep clean and jerk, one person at a time. And I got one at 187, and then I went up to 197 and on the clean, I caught it fine, and then when I stood up with it. It was just a power clean. When I stood up with it, my knee completely buckled in, and I fell backwards. I had no pain at all, but I knew something was really; it felt really weird. So I was worried if I stood up I would fall. So I looked around at my team, but we were on a clock, so I just changed the weights the way that I was supposed to for the boys, and just crawled off the floor. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: And they took me back to medical, and they were like; your ACL is completely torn.

Juli Bauer: Ugh.

Miranda: And it’s like; what do you mean? It doesn’t hurt. Can I try? Let me try to squat. Because the next workout was like wallballs. It wasn’t anything heavy. And they were like, no, you don’t understand. It’s completely torn. That’s why it doesn’t hurt. If it hurt, that would mean there was some of it left. But it’s snapped in half. Like, it’s gone.

Juli Bauer: Ugh! Gross.

Miranda: And so {laughs} me; my, he was still my husband at the time, we were separated and people didn’t know about it, which was awesome.

Juli Bauer: That’s hard. That’s so hard.

Miranda: But he’s still such a close friend, so it was nice to have him there. And then Jason Khalipa, my teammate, was in there. And Castro; Dave Castro. And me and Jason were like; well, wrap it up. Whatever. We’ll deal with it after the Games. We’re winning. We’re crushing it. Let’s go.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: And Dave was like; absolutely not. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: He was like, I’m not going to let you go out there and so many eyes are on you guys, and have your hurt yourself worse and have it be all over the internet. No. That’s not; we’re not doing that. So that was really hard. We tried everything we could with the rule book, with you guys can’t tell us whether or not we can continue. We get to decide. She’s messed up, but if she wants to try to do it she should be allowed to do it. All this stuff. It was so dramatic. And finally, they made me sit in the stands, because they were like, you guys just need to calm down. We know you came to win, and you were winning, but it’s over. You guys are done. So that was honestly psychologically way worse of a time in my life than the physical ACL tear.

Juli Bauer: That was so sad. Seeing you cry, because you could see pictures of you crying. You looked so, so sad. I don’t think people understand who have not been CrossFit competitive athletes. They don’t understand how much actual time goes into prepping before a competition. And especially when you’re working as a group and timing is so critical of making sure you guys are exactly the same throughout. So you put so much time, energy, and work into this. And to be told no in that one second, that must have been so, so hard.

Miranda: Well, it was. And I haven’t really; this is the first time I’ve talked about where my life status was at at the time. I was already a mess in my personal life. So there was that, but I think honestly the worse part was our team was different in that those, to this day, are some of my best friends. I talk to Jason at least once a week. I talk to Molly and Jen every single day. I talk to Alex at least once a week. I talk to Pat probably at least once a month. Those are my best friends, and it hurt me that; I felt like it was my fault type of a thing. Even though, obviously, I couldn’t have controlled it. But that was really painful to go through, because we had all worked so hard. And we knew that we were going to in and be able to win, because we had worked so hard and we had such a good team. So that sucked.

Juli Bauer: So how do you feel about CrossFit; since you’ve been in it almost from the beginning. You’ve been there, you’ve seen how the CrossFit Games have changed. And when people ask me, they’re like; do you wish you competed anymore?

Miranda: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: And for me, I think absolutely not. Because I adore CrossFit, and it has given me so much. But I don’t love everything they’re doing in the Games anymore. Because I think it can be so detrimental to one’s body. So how do you see how CrossFit has changed? Do you see it changing over time? That it’s gotten so f*cking crazy at this point that it’s going to kind of take a step back? What do you think about CrossFit, and the Games, and how it’s come and changed over time?

Miranda: Yeah. So I think unfortunately what has happened in a lot of ways, and I know they try to battle it. Is that people see CrossFit the program and the CrossFit Games as the same thing.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: And it’s absolutely not the same thing. The CrossFit games is a sport for athletes, full time. These people; that’s all they do. They make no money. They can’t have a regular job. A lot of them are younger now, you’ll notice. And it’s not just because they’re younger in that they haven’t wrecked their bodies, but they have free time and can still live with their parents, to be honest. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah. {Laughs}

Miranda: It’s so impressive to me to see when people have kids, and a family, and a job that go, but that’s becoming more and more rare. And I don’t see people having super long careers in the CrossFit Games anymore, for those reasons. For the fact that there’s really no money in it, and it is really hard on your body. So I think it’s awesome to have that as a goal. And then if you go and do pretty well, to try to go back and win.

But I do see people that hold onto it for way too long, to be honest. And we kind of joke about that. And then I do see people that have so much going on that’s good in their life that they sacrifice, maybe. And it’s just not; it’s not going to be as fulfilling, I think, as some people think it’s going to be. You’re not going to become famous just because you go. You’re not going to become rich. If you do it, it should be solely because you love it.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: And then everyone else needs to just hit the workout of the day one time. You don’t need your percentage work for your Oly lifts. {laughs} And you don’t need all these accessory programs or all this stuff to be fit. Or to even look fit. You can look a lot like a CrossFit Games athlete without working out four times a day if you just eat correctly, and hit the workouts hard, you know.

Juli Bauer: I think that was something that was hard for me to understand. When I competed, I was like, more is always better. And then I would think; oh, my physique will look even better the more I do and the more work I put into it. And that is just so not the case. I wish more women understood, that if you just have a good workout, and you eat clean, your body will show it if you continually do that. It doesn’t have to be 4 hours in the gym. And I think that is what is so amazing about CrossFit. And you don’t have to be a Games athlete to look incredibly fit, too.

Miranda: I know. And that’s exactly; I know some people on your Instagram were asking about our street parking program. And that’s kind of where it came from. Was I was traveling a ton last year. All over the place. Not for seminars anymore, but just for fun. And for Progenics. And then Julian, his business was getting super busy, so he was ending up having to workout at home a lot, and he was so stressed out that he wasn’t training as much. And I would tell him; hey, when I used to train with Jason, because Jason owns this massive business, he would hit something really quick in the morning, super intense, and then maybe one time again later that day, just super intense. But you can be really efficient with your time. You don’t need to spend all day.

He almost didn’t even sign up for the open this year, because he was like; I haven’t been training enough. I’m not good enough, type of thing. Because he had in his brain that volume equals fitness. And then he did so awesome all through the Open, all through Regionals, and surprised himself. And that’s when we were kind of like; people have the wrong idea. You can grab a couple of sets of dumbbells and get really fit at your house. It doesn’t need to be that complicated.

Juli Bauer: So for people who don’t know, Julian is your boyfriend, right? Not your husband. But boyfriend.

Miranda: He; yeah. Boyfriend, we feel weird about that term.

Juli Bauer: Totally. {laughs}

Miranda: We feel like we’re in 8th grade.

Juli Bauer: Well how did you two meet?

Miranda: More like partner/baby daddy, I don’t know. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah, baby daddy. {laughing} How did you two meet?

Miranda: So I know Becca and Chris Clever, who he was training with. And had a couple of other friends at the gym where he was training. And I was in town for a seminar. So I went to the gym, it was on October 16th of 2015. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughing} I don’t even know what the date is today. I don’t know how you remember it. {laughs}

Miranda: Neither do I; that’s gone out the window now. But I went there just to work out with them, because I was in town and I had a day before the seminar. And I met him. And actually, this is a romantic comedy story, kind of. There was a guy who was trying to commit suicide {laughs}; hold on. Just wait for the end of it.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} You’re like; wait. I swear it’s a comedy.

Miranda: {Laughs} In LA, he was threatening to jump off the 405 or something like that. So they shut down the 405. And anyone that lives in Southern California knows; well, you might as well stay home for the rest of the day. You can’t even drive down the street. And that’s what happened when I was at the gym.

So I asked him as I was leaving; hey, is there anywhere around here I can walk to go eat until this traffic dies? And he was like, you know what, I’ll take you. Let’s just go together. So yeah, we went and ate, and that was it. And the day after the seminar, I was down here looking for somewhere to live, because I was planning on moving down here, and so we went and got pizza the day after the seminar I feel like. And then we just talked; it kind of went from there. And I moved down here. And he was in LA and I was all the way in Newport, which is like an hour and a half distance between. So yeah. That’s how we met, was just at the gym.

Juli Bauer: Oh, that’s awesome. And then you guys started, what you were just talking about, Street Parking together. Which is kind of your online programing for people; fitness programming. If you can kind of explaining to everyone.

Miranda: Yeah. Both of us had been posting these super simple; whether it was me in a hotel or him in his garage. He came on some of the trips with me and we would post these random hotel gym workouts. And we noticed that; he could post a, “I’m doing 225-pound snatches and muscle up video.” And then the next day he could post a “I’m doing pushups and air squats in the hotel gym video.” And the pushups and air squats one would get way more views, way more comments, way more people tagging each other like, “We should do this!”

And we were like, man. There’s really something to this. There are so many programs out there for competitors, it’s ridiculous. But there’s not really anything for people who are traveling a lot and have lives like ours. So, we’re like, we should just create something super simple. And our goal was to get 100 members {laughs} by the end of January. And now we have like 1700 members.

Juli Bauer: Wow.

Miranda: It’s crazy. It’s become like a fulltime job for both of us.

Juli Bauer: When did you start that?

Miranda: Well the first workout was posted on January 1st.

Juli Bauer: Ok. Wow. So coming up on a year.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: That’s crazy. So people can just sign up.

Miranda: There’s a really cool community on Facebook, where people are like; I didn’t want to wake up today. But I know that all of you guys woke up today, so I woke up and did the workout! It’s so awesome. It’s like having an affiliate, even though you’re by yourself.

Juli Bauer: That’s awesome. So people can do these workouts anywhere? Do they need a certain amount of equipment if they want to do it in their garage or whatever?

Miranda: Yeah, we set it up so that it varies for what equipment you have. So we have program A; basically if you have a couple of sets of dumbbells and a jump rope, you’re going to be able to do all the workouts. And there’s a workout for that group every day. Program B is the same workout, basically, but the version with the barbell if you want to do it with the barbell, or if you have a barbell. And two or three times a week, we’ll have a program C version of the workout where, if you have a rower or a bike, or if you want to try doing stuff on the rings. Or just a GHD maybe. You have a more full garage gym, there will be a version of that at least a couple of times a week where you can throw that extra equipment in there.

Juli Bauer: Ok, sweet. That’s awesome. Well, congratulations on starting this new business that you didn’t really see even happening.

Miranda: {laughs} I know. Thank you.

Juli Bauer: And you don’t own CrossFit 801 anymore, correct?

Miranda: No. When we moved, we sold it to one of our trainers. It still exists. It’s still in Utah. But I’m not organized enough to own a gym from a different state.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, seriously. I don’t know how people would do that. Ok, I wanted to make sure I left a big chunk of time for this, because this is a huge new chapter in your life. You gave birth to a little baby boy how long ago now?

Miranda: 8 weeks tomorrow.

Juli Bauer: 8 weeks. So how are you feeling at 8 weeks so far?

Miranda: Well, when we were supposed to have this call, I was like; Juli, can I work out really quick? And I was dying. And I feel like {laughs} of all the injuries I’ve had. Because I know people are super impressed with the neck and the knee; and people have babies every single day and go back to CrossFit, but this is definitely the most out of shape I’ve been. I’m sleep deprived and everything. It’s so much joy, and I love him so much, and I wouldn’t trade any of it for the world. But it’s definitely hard, for sure.

Juli Bauer: I heard it’s very hard. {laughs} I am very much on the fence about ever having children, and everyone’s like, it is the biggest blessing, it’s the greatest thing you will ever experience, but f*ck it is awful sometimes. {laughs} And it sounds so incredibly hard. So I do want to hear; I just had two friends just this week give birth, so I’ve heard two different stories. Can you kind of tell your, just were you sick very much? Did you workout when you were pregnant? And then kind of your birth story, and we can kind of talk about postpartum.

Miranda: Yeah. So I found out I was pregnant. I was pretty newly pregnant. I want to say I was only like 6 weeks, because I was always really regular and stuff like that. So I knew pretty early. And the only major symptom I had at first; I never got sick, so that’s nice. The only symptom I had was I was so tired. Like, to the point where I had to call Julian when I was driving home from work because I thought I was going to crash and die tired. 2 o’clock in the afternoon came around, and I could not keep my eyes open. It was really hard. And that was the major, major symptom that I had at first.

Then after that, I had really bad heartburn. I never had a hard time sleeping. I worked out pretty much through the whole thing. Even when I was tired, I think I still worked out at least 4 days a week. And I know, I’ve seen a lot of people ask comments, like how is that possible. I’m so tired; I was tired too. It’s just the only thing that made me feel somewhat normal. And it actually made me have more energy when I would workout. So there were a couple of times, honestly. Oh, and I was obviously super emotional and hormonal. I remember one time I was crying in my room for who knows why. And Julian was just like, come ride the bike. And I was literally sitting on the bike, crying for 10 minutes, and that was my workout for that day.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. I feel like when you care so much about your workouts, but then once you have this huge life change. Whether it’s illness, or having a baby, or healing from a knee. Just moving in general; even if you’re walking or sitting on the bike. Just continually moving is so important to get through those challenging; just different changes in life.

Miranda: Oh yeah, it would help me so much mentally, emotionally, and then obviously I think that’s the reason I slept ok. I didn’t have too much pain and stuff like that, like in my joints. Towards the end I got kind of swollen, but it was really towards the end that my feet got swollen, stuff like that, and I really think it was because I was moving.

I know people on your Instagram asked, too, about food, like cravings and stuff. I never really had any. {laughs} Like a couple of times, I was like; I feel like a cookie. But I do that now, so I don’t think that was…

Juli Bauer: Yeah, nothing crazy different.

Miranda: Yeah. I ate almost exactly the same as what I was eating before. Because I wasn’t working out as much with as much intensity. So I was like, well there’s my extra calories. I’ll just keep eating what I’m eating. And still now, that’s pretty much what I’m eating.

Juli Bauer: The same.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: What kind of changes did you have to do to your normal CrossFit workouts. Your normal Street Parking workouts you were doing in your garage?

Miranda: I didn’t take too much out until February. So I found out I was pregnant in November, and I kept everything pretty normal. But it was hard to breathe. I could tell I was more tired. I read that you have like 30% more blood in your body when you’re pregnant, and I could tell my heart was working extra hard during that time even though I hadn’t really gained too much weight or anything. After the Open, I started taking stuff out. The Open was the last time I did toes to bar, bar muscle ups, muscle ups, all that kind of stuff.

And I never really felt great lifting heavy. I felt like my joints felt weird when I would lift heavy. And I know a lot of people do lift heavy when they’re pregnant, but it didn’t feel right to me. And then the belly didn’t really get in the way until I was like maybe 7 months pregnant.

I mean, I just kind of took it day by day. I box jumped until one day I did a box jump it felt weird, and then I never box jumped again. I could do double unders, even towards the end, but why? I don’t need to be doing that. I don’t need to be bouncing around with a baby in there.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: I hate running, so as soon as I was pregnant, I was like; “you know what, I don’t think running is safe.”

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Miranda: Like, this is dangerous. {laughs} I don’t think I should ever run again for that matter.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} I think I saw a comment on there that a woman is like; obviously CrossFit was out of the equation or something along those lines. I think it’s strange to me that people still see that as a thing that people can’t workout or can’t physically do things. Because I’ve seen some women who were really great with CrossFit and then once they got pregnant they had to slow it down a lot to keep their heart rate down. While others were able to just push through completely. So when you say; ok, a box jump didn’t feel good anymore. Or double unders didn’t feel great anymore; you just took it out. So I think women need to understand that every person is completely different.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: And you can still continually workout, especially if you’ve been working out beforehand. You just have to listen to your body, because it’s continually changing every day.

Miranda: Yeah. Luckily, I know so many women like you do who have done CrossFit before, had a baby. So there’s people to ask. And the only consistent advice that I got was; “You shouldn’t have to lie down after your workout.” If you’re out of breath, dying, you can’t talk, that’s probably not good for your fetus.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: So I would always make sure that I could talk. And then when the workout was over, I needed to be physically capable to walk like a 400 meter immediately the second I was done. And that’s what I did the whole time.

I mean, that’s a thing when I would post videos. I think there were people that didn’t know me before I was pregnant, had somehow found me through the pregnant hashtags I was using or something, and they would be like, I can’t believe you’re doing that! But if you had seen what I was doing before, it actually was extremely scaled. So I think sometimes people don’t understand. Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Totally. Yeah. So, my girlfriend. I was at her house yesterday, and she was telling me a little bit about her birth story.

Miranda: Oh boy.

Juli Bauer: She was like; Juli, there’s a reason nobody talks about childbirth. It is not a great experience whatsoever.

Miranda: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: She was like, when you walk in the door, get the epidural. Don’t be a hero, get the epidural. And I’ve heard that from multiple people. So will you just tell your birth story? Did you have an at home birth?

Miranda: I had a birth at a midwifery.

Juli Bauer: Ok.

Miranda: It’s basically like having it at a hotel where drugs are not an option because they do not have them. And you can do the bathtub and comfy bed and all that stuff. But you don’t have to clean up after it, so that’s why I didn’t want to have it at my house. We have like four dogs, and it just would not have been relaxing.

Juli Bauer: No!

Miranda: Not that it’s relaxing, but.

Juli Bauer: No. Because you know what? It’s like, why does nobody talk about how you have to give birth to the placenta after you give birth to your child?

Miranda: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Why does nobody talk about that? It’s like, hey, no I have to give birth twice. This is so f*cked up. So wait, tell me your birth story. Let’s hear this birth story at the midwife place.

Miranda: Ok, I’m going to try to be as honest with you as possible.

Juli Bauer: I love it. I love the honesty.

Miranda: Ok. How many people listen to this?

Juli Bauer: Oh I have absolutely no idea.

Miranda: Whatever, ok.

Juli Bauer: In my mind, like 5. {laughs}

Miranda: Ok. It’s just me and you.

Juli Bauer: Just me and you here.

Miranda: So first of all, let’s go to my due date was July 28th. And I’m an achiever, and I control my fate, and he did not come out on July 28th, and I was so upset. He was 3 days late. But even yesterday or two days ago I told somebody that he was 9 days late, because that’s how my brain remembers those three days. Like, I was so upset. And actually going back to the workout thing, they told me not to workout, because they thought he was small. So they didn’t want me to workout anymore for like the last week of my pregnancy. And by the day he was supposed to come out, Julian was like; screw that. Go out to the gym, do what makes you feel normal. Workout. So the day that I actually went into labor, I worked out that night, the night before. And I think that’s what helped, just get me to freaking relax.

So then at 2 a.m. I woke up and I had pretty strong pains in my stomach. But I’ve never had a baby before, so I dealt with it for a couple of hours. And then I woke Julian up and I was like, I don’t know if these are labor pains or if it’s just uncomfortable. He was like, let’s go for a walk. So we took the dogs for a walk, and they were getting worse and stuff like that. So he was like, I think we should call the midwife.

So I had a doula. This is all very southern California, by the way. Whatever, you’re in Colorado. Same thing.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. {laughs}

Miranda: I had a doula, so we called our doula, and she came over. And they were definitely contractions by the time she got there. So it was freaking painful. Like your friend said; I wasn’t like humming through it. I’m not like a yogi/Zen person. It was really bad.

So she was there for a while, because you’re not supposed to go to the hospital or to the midwifery until your contractions are like 2 minutes apart, basically. Because they don’t want you there for two days. When it’s almost time to start pushing, that’s when they want you to come.

So she stayed there and timed it. It was really bad, really painful. My mom was here. Julian’s mom lives with us, so she was here. And Julian and the doula. And there’s nothing anyone can do to help you, really.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: Everyone feels so helpless. But they helped me get my stuff ready, and they were timing everything. And then when we were driving to the midwifery, finally, it was like 11 a.m. so I had been in pain for like 9 hours at that point. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: And is it just like really bad cramps?

Miranda: Yeah, but really bad.

Juli Bauer: Like pressure?

Miranda: Yeah. And I remember people telling me because I’m so fit my birth was going to be super easy. I wasn’t out of breath. It just hurt {laughs}. Being fit doesn’t make someone punching you in the face hurt any less {laughs}.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, exactly.

Miranda: You know, so that went out the window. So we drove at like 11. Julian, of course; all my best friends were at the CrossFit Games competing. Because Molly and Jen, they have a team again this year. So he’s like face timing them. I’m sobbing in the car, in so much pain in the back seat. I look up and I see my friends on face time. They’re like; good job!

Juli Bauer: Oh my god! Oh my god!

Miranda: And I’m like, hi, oh my gosh. Anyway. We get there, and they check for how dilated you are. Basically you have to be dilated to a 10 before you can push. And I was only at like a 4, ok. So they were like; you’re at a 4. I was like; what the heck. I’ve already been having contractions for like 9 hours.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: So whatever. And then they came back in, I want to say like 2 or 3 hours later, and they were like ok, let’s check you again. And I had been, again, having painful contractions the whole time in between that at the midwifery. They checked me again, I was still at a 4.

Juli Bauer: And, like how far apart are your contractions at this point?

Miranda: Like one every minute and a half or something like that.

Juli Bauer: Oh my god! This sounds just like my friend.

Miranda: And they last for a while minute.

Juli Bauer: That’s so f*cked up.

Miranda: I know. And Julian was such a champion. Literally, he held me up every single time, my full body weight was on him. I got in the bath for a lot of it. He was feeding me sticks of honey, and making me eat trail mix and stuff. He did not leave; I think he only left the room once to pee and eat something, but he was gone for like 5 minutes. So he was just like; oh my gosh, how much longer is this going to take?

Juli Bauer: Seriously.

Miranda: Exhausted, you know, and I’m just screaming and crying and whatever. So when they came back and told me I was still only a 4 after 12 hours almost of being in that much pain, in my head, I was like, I can’t do this. You’ve got to take me to the hospital.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: I can’t do this. And Julian {laughs} I remember one time they left us alone in the room, and he was like; you are not going to let these midwife ladies think that you can’t do this. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: So I was like, ok. Honestly, they offered me laughing gas. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Oh, that’s cool.

Miranda: Yeah. That’s the pain medication; it helps you to relax, basically. Because they told me my problem was every time I was having a contraction, I was tightening my whole body. Because that’s what I’m conditioned to do.

Juli Bauer: Uh, duh. Who wouldn’t do that?

Miranda: Yeah, so my whole body would tighten and he wasn’t able to move and get lower and all this stuff. So they were like, if you have the gas, it’s not necessarily going to hurt less, but you’re going to be able to relax. So I was like, I don’t know. I wanted to do this 100% natural only. I feel like I’m cheating if I do that. And Julian was like; babe, don’t be a hero. You’ve got to have the gas. You need to relax right now. So we did that.

And then she came in, and this is going to be graphic sounding, but she manually opened me up from a 4 to a 7.

Juli Bauer: Ohhh! No! No.

Miranda: I threw up everywhere.

Juli Bauer: Shut up.

Miranda: While she was doing it.

Juli Bauer: This is f*cking crazy.

Miranda: I was projectile vomiting on Julian. {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Oh my god! {laughing} Oh my god.

Miranda: My mom and his mom were watching; my mom was probably like, what the heck.

Juli Bauer: Oh my god. See, this is why people never talk about childbirth. That’s f*cking crazy.

Miranda: Yeah. And then from there, I ended up sitting on the toilet for like an hour and a half, because that was the only place I could relax {laughs}. And I got from a 7 to a 10 in the next hour or hour and a half. And then finally I was like; my body is pushing him out. I can’t stop it. And they were like, ok get in the tub. I only pushed for like 45 minutes. And while that was super painful, I felt like…

Juli Bauer: Only 45 minutes! {laughing}

Miranda: Yeah. I was in control of it at that point, though. I knew I could assist this now. I could actually physically do something to help get him out of me.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: So literally every time there was a contraction, I was treating it like I was pulling my one-rep max deadlift, and just…

Juli Bauer: Yeah, you know how it should feel.

Miranda: I was like, I don’t care if I tear. I don’t care what happens. He needs to come; get him out of me. So 45 minutes I pushed. He came out. And then he didn’t breathe for 2 minutes after that.

Juli Bauer: Oh f*ck.

Miranda: So I don’t really remember it being 2 minutes long, because I was so out of it, but Julian is like scarred for life from this 2 minutes of him not breathing.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: So they pulled him out, and he was just kind of limp. And I was in the bathtub, and I was still connected to him. So they were like, stand up, Miranda, you need to stand up. So I had to stand up right away {laughs}.

Juli Bauer: Oh my god.

Miranda: And they had to pump him a few times, and clean out his mouth and stuff like that and he was fine. Everybody else said that it was terrifying, but I don’t really remember it that much.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. And then, so then they cut the cord. And you have to give birth to the placenta, right?

Miranda: Yeah, but that doesn’t hurt that bad because it kind of comes out a little easier.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, because it’s not a head.

Miranda: Yeah, it’s more like; this is f*cking annoying. Can I be done now? Seriously. But it doesn’t really hurt.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. That’s exactly what my friend said. She was like, it’s just annoying. And she was like; and they took my baby, because he was the same. He was unresponsive. And they just had to clean his nose and everything, and she was like, “Give me my f*cking baby back!” Like freaking out.

Miranda: Yeah. So that was the nice thing, they never took him from me. He was attached to me, and then they cut the cord. But I was lying right there when they did it. They put him on my chest right away. And here’s the craziest, actually. Let’s get to when I came home. Because the midwifery is different than the hospital, and you should just know this if you’re going to go this route. They made sure that he could latch onto my boob and breastfeed before I left. I had to get like two stitches, so they did that. And I felt totally fine. And then as we were getting ready to leave, I started to not feel fine. I was not fine.

We left; I came home like 4 hours after he was born.

Juli Bauer: Oh wow.

Miranda: {laughs} And that night, I’m not joking, I told Julian that this is how the pioneers died, from childbirth.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: And I was like, he’s going to be a single father. I’m dying. I was so depleted. The adrenaline was gone. I was in so much pain. I had a massive bruise, like hematoma from where I had given birth. I couldn’t sit. {laughs} I was like, this is how death happened on the plains. {laughing}

Juli Bauer: F*ck yeah! Yeah. How did anybody survive? How did we make it this far? I don’t understand.

Miranda: I don’t know. I don’t know. And it makes you question how tough you really are. Because you see these little tiny women with their babies, and you’re like; how was I such a pussy about it? She had a kid. It was fine. I don’t know. But it was traumatic for me and Julian both.

Juli Bauer: Yeah! Oh my god, especially if you’re projectile vomiting {laughing}. That is crazy. It’s crazy just how everyone’s story is so; you can read all the books in the world but none of it matters because everyone’s story is so different in their birth story.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: It’s so crazy.

Miranda: Oh, also I should mention that Julian did get in the bathtub with me and he did kind of help catch him, because he was really excited about that and that was really cool that he did that.

Juli Bauer: Jeeze. That’s crazy! Wow. Ok, so that’s bananas. So let’s now talk about postpartum. So obviously you’re breastfeeding.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Ok. And that has gone smoothly?

Miranda: Yeah, it’s been pretty smooth. It’s hard because there will be days where he wants to eat every single hour, so you don’t sleep and you can’t work or do anything or whatever. But he doesn’t have a hard time eating, which I know a lot of people struggle with, so I’m lucky that way.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. So have you had trouble sleeping as you’ve been into this postpartum stage and having to wake up every hour or so? Have you guys kind of switched off, bottle fed or anything like that?

Miranda: I haven’t ever bottle fed him at night. If I’m home, and I’m not working out, I try to feed him. Pretty much the only time we bottle feed him is if we are with him, out of the house, so I don’t have to worry about the whole bringing the breastfeeding cover and all that stuff. We’ll just feed him with a bottle. Or if I’m working out, and he wakes up, then he’ll get bottle fed. But pretty much other than that I feed him. At night, I sleep at 2 hours at a time. That’s just how it is now.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. And how long did you take off until you started working out again? And kind of what; and this is based on some of the questions I’ve gotten. What kind of workouts have you been doing? How have you been working on the pelvic floor? I always hear about the pelvic floor with women. But I don’t really know what that means. {laughs}

Miranda: Yeah. They’re like the inside muscles, Juli. It’s why people pee for the rest of their life after they have a baby, when they do double unders and stuff. Because they get weaker.

Juli Bauer: Did you ever pee in double unders before having a baby?

Miranda: Yeah, I did.

Juli Bauer: You did? So many women at the gym. I’ve never had that before, but so many women at the gym have that.

Miranda: Yeah, I’ve peed before. So you can look up pelvic floor; Birth Fit has good stuff on there. The girl that I work with, her Instagram is like @Brianna Battles. She’s who worked with Lindsey Valenzuela, which is why I reached out to her. Because Lindsey had such a crazy come back. And basically it’s just tightening the inside muscles back up so that everything goes back to normal. There’s so much trauma. It’s just rehab for a different set of muscles. I started doing that stuff like 2 weeks after.

And then walking was huge. Just to get out of my house and feel like I was burning some calories. I was walking for like an hour a day, just pushing my little stroller, my little guy in the stroller to feel like I was moving, and getting my blood flowing and sweating a little bit. And then I just started adding things in slow. I still had the big huge bruise, hematoma, until like a week ago. I couldn’t even ride the bike.

Juli Bauer: Oh my god.

Miranda: But I started doing some slow air squats or wall balls and stuff like that. And then I have taken the same approach that I took when I was pregnant. If I try something and it feels weird, then I won’t do it yet. I’m adding weight back in slowly. And some stuff I know I could do. I’ve done some pullups, but also it feels weird in my abs when I do them. It still feels like it stretches them a little bit. So I’m just waiting, you know.

Juli Bauer: Ok. And you’ve felt good coming back pretty much?

Miranda: I mean, I feel really, really out of shape.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: But {laughs} yeah, I don’t have any pain. I actually got checked by a pelvic floor PT. They have those.

Juli Bauer: Oh cool.

Miranda: And she said that everything actually feels really well rehabbed from what I’ve been doing. I’ve been pretty diligent at working on that stuff for at least 15 minutes a day. And I know people were asking about the ab separation too. Mine was super minimal. I’ve seen or heard of stories of people where it’s like; they measure it by finger widths, how many fingers you can fit in between the middle part of your abs. And mine’s only like a 1. But people have like 4 fingers’ worth that they can fit in between there.

Juli Bauer: Wow.

Miranda: Yeah. So mine was super minimal. The only reason I got it checked was just to make sure. You just have to be careful for a little bit. Because it’s still so stretched out. People are like, what do you mean it stretches? And I’m like…

Juli Bauer: What do you mean? Yeah.

Miranda: Of course it stretches. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah, duh! {laughs}

Miranda: It has to, for the baby. It has to go somewhere.

Juli Bauer: So obviously you are a person who cares about not only the workouts you do but how you physically feel. How you look on the outside. You want to stay physically fit and your body is important. So how has it been, not only going through the stages of pregnancy, but afterwards and dealing with your body looking completely different than what you visually want to see in the mirror. Or what you have seen for so many years. How has it been going through that mentally?

Miranda: Honestly, I think it’s really hard, and every woman goes through it no matter what. I mean, as cheesy and dumb as it sounds, I feel like on some level, it’s like I’m known for my abs. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah, yeah. For sure.

Miranda: And that’s not that exciting to be known for. And you think that you don’t care, but you end up, you know, caring. I’ve actually; a couple of funny stories. I’ve lost a solid 3000 Instagram followers since I’ve had my baby.

Juli Bauer: Aww!

Miranda: Actually, since becoming pregnant. I had a huge drop. And then when I started posting pictures of my baby, and of me working out in a sports bra afterwards {laughs} I’ve lost like another 1500.

Juli Bauer: Ugh! You can’t look at those numbers! Don’t look at them!

Miranda: I know. I laugh about it, but at the same time, of course you’re like; aw man. That sucks. But that’s silly. And then the other day I was so tired. Half the time I don’t change out of my underwear or PJs until like 1 o’clock in the afternoon, and I’m holding little baby Knox, and I walk past the full-length mirror in our bedroom, and I just catch a glimpse of my body and my tired face and my hair and everything, and I was like, oh no. I put him down, I turned the mirror around. I was like, I can’t keep walking past this every day. So yeah. It’s really tough.

And then of course, there are the days; Julian tries to be super supportive, and I’m like; you have no idea! You got to compete at regionals, and you still look awesome! This and that. You don’t’ know how hard it is, type of a thing. So of course I try to stay positive. And I’ve been committed to posting real pictures of myself, just because I know there are so many people that can benefit from that. But it’s not because I’m not affected by it.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Yeah. I feel like a lot of women don’t talk about that because; you just created a baby! And not every woman gets to do that, too. So, there’s this part of you that doesn’t want to complain about anything. But that’s something, I think that’s very hard for women is seeing their body change. But do you feel excited about kind of what the future has to bring, and what your body is going to be able to do in the future?

Miranda: Well it kind of brings it back to fun again. Because I’m like you; I have no interest in competing. Honestly.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: I’ll do; if a friend of mine is like, hey let’s go do this Saturday comp, I’ll be like, sure let’s go. Or me and Julian did a team comp together last year that was like; we decided the night before to do it type of thing. Fine.

But it gives me a new goal, now. And it’s fun. Well, every time I’ve been injured and now, you get to have your post-surgery PR, and now I get to PR everything again. And I get to do; like I’m so excited for when I get to try to do muscle ups again. And I’m so excited for when I get to add things back in. So it kind of makes it more fun again, to be honest.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: So yeah.

Juli Bauer: That’s awesome. Well, I want to ask a couple of questions before you go, because I know I’ve held you for an hour and I’m sure that your child needs to feed again.

Miranda: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: So, I want to ask you. This is totally not even on the birth realm of things, because we kind of talked a lot about that. But, I know so many people say that you look; and I hope I’m saying your name right. Dana Lynn Bailey; like Dana.

Miranda: {laughs} Yeah.

Juli Bauer: So everybody says you look like her; and she’s in the bodybuilding community, correct?

Miranda: Yes.

Juli Bauer: So, how did you guys end up coming together, and what was it like meeting this person that everyone says is your doppelganger?

Miranda: So it’s so funny. Because she has a way bigger following than I do. She’s like, insane in the body building community. But I used to get tagged all the time, being like; she’s like the CrossFit version of DLB, blah, blah, blah. And I guess she had gotten tagged a couple of times saying the same thing, like, “Oh my gosh, you remind me of Miranda from CrossFit.” She wanted to learn how to do CrossFit. So she; actually her husband reached out to me on Instagram and asked if I would come teach her how to do it.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: And I was like, this is so awesome! I’ve been told so many times that we look alike. And then we started texted, me and her, about me coming out there where she lived in Pennsylvania to teach her how to do some of the CrossFit movements and to hang out with her. And literally, she’s the raddest person. I stayed at her house that weekend. And I’ve seen her a couple of other times here in LA. And yeah, we became friends. I still talk to her all the time. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: And do you know if she’s doing any sort of CrossFit workouts, or did she just stick with her bodybuilding stuff? Because she competes still, in bodybuilding, right?

Miranda: No, she doesn’t compete anymore. She’s over it. She’s like, I just like to workout. And that’s why she got such a huge following, because she trains different than most bodybuilders do. When I worked out with her, it was bodybuilding movements, but it was like a CrossFit type of workout. They don’t rest. Most bodybuilders, you think of them doing a set and then sipping their water for a couple of minutes. It was pretty high intensity body building. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah!

Miranda: And she’s super strong. She does a lot of power lifting stuff now. She’s super into power lifting. But every once in a while, I know she still does some CrossFit type movements. But she really has gotten into loving power lifting.

Juli Bauer: Oh, that’s cool. I need to follow her more. I kind of looked at her when you were with her, and I was looking back and forth at her photos. But I haven’t followed her in a long time.

Miranda: Yeah, her and her husband are super cool.

Juli Bauer: Aww, that’s awesome. So another person asked about macros. Did you do macros for a while, or did you do any sort of counting while you were competing or nowadays?

Miranda: I was doing macros, not so much while I was competing. I was just trying to eat all of the food while I was competing. Because we were working out so much. But then after, when I got pregnant, I was doing macros. Just because at that point I wasn’t trying to compete, I just wanted to do them to learn about it, to be honest, and just to try to look good, whatever. So yeah, I was doing macros then. And I kind of do them now, but in reality, I just eat the same thing every single day.

Juli Bauer: What kind of diet do you follow? Do you follow a paleo or Zone or do you try to stay away from certain kinds of food? What kind of food do you like to eat?

Miranda: Well, Juli, I am extremely lucky, because Julian’s company is a meal prep company.

Juli Bauer: Oh, that’s awesome.

Miranda: So before I got pregnant, I was eating some of his food and then some I was still making my own breakfast. I’m not 100% paleo, because I was still working out a lot, and I was pretty lean. And whenever I ate 100% paleo, I didn’t have energy. I had no energy. But I was making your recipes, like once a week at least.

Juli Bauer: I know that was so fun!

Miranda: So it’s just clean. It’s mostly paleo, with the addition of rice and oatmeal sometimes and stuff like that.

Juli Bauer: Ok. So do you try to stay gluten free?

Miranda: I like bread like every other day. Gluten has never bothered me. Dairy bothers me a lot. I can’t do dairy at all. So I’ve tested; in my 10 years of CrossFit I’ve played around with Zone, and paleo, and all that stuff. And just kind of figured out what works best for me. Bread doesn’t bother me too much. Dairy bothers me a lot. If I eat 100% paleo, I feel like I don’t have as much energy. But I eat pretty clean. Yeah. But now, I’m so lucky because literally I eat four of his meals every single day. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: That is awesome. I’m very jealous of that.

Miranda: Yeah. They have a paleo menu that’s paleo, and then they have a macro menu. And usually I eat off the macro menu, so it’s super clean with some rice or potatoes and stuff like that in there.

Juli Bauer: And what is that company called?

Miranda: That company is Fierro’s Kitchen. And it just delivers only in SoCal.

Juli Bauer: Ok. Well anybody who’s in SoCal can definitely look that up. That’s awesome. So we kind of covered pretty much everybody’s questions in all the chats we just had. And I wanted to ask this one question, because I remember seeing this. And I kind of tried to find it on your Instagram, but I think it was super far back. Because you posted this kind of before and after photo, and I think it was before CrossFit. You were heavier than you were in this picture with your, of course, a million abs. And then you talked about how something was different because your boobs were much bigger. So I’m guessing you had implants before?

Miranda: So the history of my boobs.

Juli Bauer: Yes! {laughs} Because I have implants, so I just wanted to kind of talk about that. Because I have to kind of change things in CrossFit because of my implants, so I didn’t know if it had to do anything with that, why you had them taken out. So let’s hear this boob story.

Miranda: So I got a student loan when I was 20 {laughs}.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Miranda: And spent that money on massive implants. It was around the same time that I was super into competing and wanted to compete in body building. And I had no boobs. And you actually lose points for that, to be honest. Because you don’t go in at the waist as much, and blah, blah, blah. Whatever. So it was a muscle that I could not work, and I went way over the top. They were way too big for my body. And I only had them for like 3 years, and then I got them removed because I hated them and they were painful.

Juli Bauer: Oh my god! How big were they?

Miranda: They were like; I don’t remember. They were at least Ds.

Juli Bauer: Ok.

Miranda: Yeah. They were as big, if not bigger, than my boobs are now with the breastfeeding.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: So then I removed them, but then May of last year I got little ones put back in; because again, I had no boobs. So my boobs have had a long history of surgeries.

Juli Bauer: So how long ago did you get smaller ones in?

Miranda: May; around regionals 2016.

Juli Bauer: OK. And do you have any issues with working out?

Miranda: Not really. And I don’t have any issues with breastfeeding, either. Because I know that’s something that can come up. But I haven’t; they’re really small. I literally told them put them smallest possible ones you can put in there.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Well that’s awesome. I’ve talked with another friend who got implants and then she just felt like they weren’t part of her body, so she had them removed. So it’s always interesting to see different people’s experiences with implants. And especially with working out, or breastfeeding. Because you never know what you’re going to get with breastfeeding and implants.

Miranda: Yeah. I got them removed because they were super painful, even to sleep, because I just got; they were way too big.

Juli Bauer: That’s crazy.

Miranda: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Damn. Well I just had to end on boob story. Who doesn’t like to end on a boob story?

Miranda: We’ve gone through a lot.

Juli Bauer: Seriously! We’ve gone through a lot.

Miranda: You started by asking me what my last name is, and me not knowing the answer to that question.

Juli Bauer: I know! Well last week I talked about colonics, which is like getting a professional enema on the podcast. So, we talk about things coming out of all crevices on this podcast.

Miranda: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: So thank you for being part of that.

Miranda: Oh, good.

Juli Bauer: I really appreciate that. {laughs} Thank you for telling your story. I know people are going to love this; especially someone who is in the fitness community and has worked out throughout their pregnancy and afterwards. And then people can find you; can you tell everybody where they can find you on social media or your website or whatever else? Or Street Parking. Everything.

Miranda: Yeah. So best way is just on Instagram. My Instagram is now Fearless Miranda. And Street Parking is Street_Parking. So that’s it. That’s the best way. And you can find whatever else you’re looking for by going there.

Juli Bauer: Awesome. Well thank you so much for being on, and chatting with us, and telling us all the gory details, so women really know what they’re in for, you know. Don’t sugar coat it.

Miranda: They still don’t know. That’s the thing.

Juli Bauer: That’s true.

Miranda: You can’t explain. Yeah.

Juli Bauer: That’s very true. Well thank you so much, Miranda. You can hold on the line. Thank you everyone for listening. Don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe, and I’ll talk to you next week. Bye-bye for now.

Today on the podcast, I’m talking to CrossFit athlete, coach and previous HQ staff Miranda Chivers. We talk about everything from competing in CrossFit, to her breaking her neck, going through knee surgery and giving birth to her first child…all […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking to CrossFit athlete, coach and previous HQ staff Miranda Chivers. We talk about everything from competing in CrossFit, to her breaking her neck, going through knee surgery and giving birth to her first child…all […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:11:27
Listener Questions – Episode 54: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 14 Oct 2017 13:02:02 +0000 23 I asked on instagram if you guys had any questions and I’m answering all of them here! If I missed anything, feel free to leave a comment on the blog and I’m happy to answer it!! Big thank you to […] I asked on instagram if you guys had any questions and I’m answering all of them here! If I missed anything, feel free to leave a comment on the blog and I’m happy to answer it!! Big thank you to everyone who left a question!!


Big Thank You to Our Sponsor – ButcherBox

ButcherBox sources and delivers the best quality grass-fed, grass-finished, antibiotic and hormone-free, pasture-raised beef, chicken and pork straight to your doorstep. And getting your ButcherBox is super easy – just select your box, customize it to your liking, and then set your schedule of how often you want to receive your ButcherBox. They offer free shipping to the contiguous 48 states and each classic box is filled with 8-11 pounds of meat. They also just launched their custom box so customers can actually choose everything that comes in their box! And right now, PaleOMG Uncensored listeners can get $10 off their first order PLUS 2 FREE grass fed, grass finished ribeyes! Click here to receive this special offer!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 54 Transcription Coming Soon!

I asked on instagram if you guys had any questions and I’m answering all of them here! If I missed anything, feel free to leave a comment on the blog and I’m happy to answer it!! Big thank you to […] I asked on instagram if you guys had any questions and I’m answering all of them here! If I missed anything, feel free to leave a comment on the blog and I’m happy to answer it!! Big thank you to […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:31:43
Michelle Tam of Nom Nom Paleo – Episode 53: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 07 Oct 2017 12:06:08 +0000 10 In this podcast, I’m chatting with the great Michelle Tam from! Michelle’s blog was one of the first paleo blogs I came across when I started paleo and she continues to crush it in the blog and cookbook world. […] In this podcast, I’m chatting with the great Michelle Tam from! Michelle’s blog was one of the first paleo blogs I came across when I started paleo and she continues to crush it in the blog and cookbook world. She has some of the most creative and beautiful dishes I’ve ever seen and her cookbooks will absolutely blow you away. But the best part about Michelle is she is just a damn good person. If you haven’t met Michelle yet, get to know her on her blog! And be sure to check out her two cookbooks – Nom Nom Paleo Cookbook and Ready or Not Cookbook!


Big Thank You to Our Sponsor – ButcherBox

ButcherBox sources and delivers the best quality grass-fed, grass-finished, antibiotic and hormone-free, pasture-raised beef, chicken and pork straight to your doorstep. And getting your ButcherBox is super easy – just select your box, customize it to your liking, and then set your schedule of how often you want to receive your ButcherBox. They offer free shipping to the contiguous 48 states and each classic box is filled with 8-11 pounds of meat. They also just launched their custom box so customers can actually choose everything that comes in their box! And right now, PaleOMG Uncensored listeners can get $10 off their first order PLUS 2 FREE grass fed, grass finished ribeyes! Click here to receive this special offer!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 54 Transcription!

Well hey there darlin’ face. Welcome to another episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. I have a very special guest today that I’m a tad obsessed with. But before I get to that lovely person, let’s talk about this month’s sponsor. Because they are the best. And hopefully you listened to last weeks’ episode when I talked to the owner, Mike, of Butcher Box. And that’s who our sponsor is this month. Butcher Box. And when I say our sponsor, I don’t know who I’m talking about. I’m literally talking about myself. This is a one-man operation over here.

Anywho. Butcher Box is the best. And I love them. And I’ve used them for probably 8 months at this point. If you haven’t heard me talk about it on my blog, or even here, or on my Instagram, let me tell you a little bit about it. I’m tripping over every word.

If you haven’t heard of Butcher Box, they deliver pasture raised, grass-fed, grass-finished, the best quality beef, chicken, and pork that’s humanely raised and free of antibiotics and hormones. And they deliver it straight to your doorstep. So you don’t have to go to the grocery store and try to figure out what is the best quality meat. They source it for you, and deliver it right to you. It’s so awesome.

So all you have to do is select your box. Log in online, you select your box, you customize it to your liking, and you set your schedule for how often you want to receive that Butcher Box. They offer free shipping to the contiguous 48 states. And each classic box is filled with 8-11 pounds of meat.

They also launched their custom box, which I think is super cool because you get to pick whatever meat you want in it. So, say you’re like, I am a cool ass b*tch; I only want a little filet mignon, throw in a little bacon. That’s all I want in my box. Boom, done. If you like only stew meat because it’s fall and you just want to put everything in the crockpot, boom. You can pick it. So you can pick exactly what you want, and then you can cook from my recipes. Which makes it even easier.

And because they are the best, get this. PaleOMG Uncensored listeners are going to get $10 off their first order, plus two free grass-fed, grass-finished ribeyes. So all you have to do is go to and then you can figure out the perfect box for you. You’ll get $10 off your first order and two free ribeyes for new customers. It is awesome you guys. I use it in almost every single recipe. I put all the meat in the freezer when I get it, because it’s already frozen, and then I can pick as I go. I just marinated some steak tips in the fridge overnight, and I’m about to cook them. I don’t know if you can hear the onions in the back. But I’m about to cook everything up to make a new recipe for you guys.

So check them out. You’re going to love them.

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: Ok. We are on! Welcome to another episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. My name is Juli Bauer Roth, and today I have the best guest of all time. I have Michelle Tam from Nom Nom Paleo. Thank you so much, Michelle, for coming on.

Michelle Tam: Thank you. You’re making me blush.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Aww. Well I’m so excited to have you. A little history on us. Michelle and I met, it had to have been like 5 years ago at, what was it? It was like a paleo event in Estes Park.

Michelle Tam: Oh, that’s right! I forgot about that. Yeah, Melissa Julwan and I and Holly Woodcock. We had a paleo event way up in Estes Park. And I think one of the organizers was like, “Hey, we should have Juli come!” And I was like, “Yeah, that would be awesome! Because I’ve never met her and I think she’s really awesome.” But I think because I don’t know geography, I didn’t realize she was asking you to drive like 3 hours into the mountains. {laughing}

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Michelle Tam: So now I’m like; oh I’m so sorry I made you come out. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Oh my gosh. And me being the idiot, I looked at the map in the morning before I left. I was like, “Oh sh*t I need to leave now!” Like, I didn’t even know how far Estes Park is. Being a Colorado native, I don’t even know how to understand that. And then I was lost for a good 2 hours when I got to Estes Park before I even got to the event. And the event is like full on going. And I’m like, oh hi. I felt like such an ass.

Michelle Tam: No, it was amazing. And then you came up and did the cooking demo with me. And you danced. It was amazing.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} I can’t believe that was like 5 years ago.

Michelle Tam: I know! I forgot.

Juli Bauer: I wish they would have been able to do that event again. That was so fun.

Michelle Tam: I do too, except it’s far. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs} That’s super far for you guys.

Michelle Tam: But it was nice. When we came out to Denver, just on our last book tour, we were like, “We need to go to the Stanley Hotel.” Because I have a kid who is obsessed with Stephen King. And I’m like, “OK, we will drive to Estes Park.” And we realize how far this is from Denver now! {laughs}

Juli Bauer: I know. It’s so far. And it’s just kind of a pain in the ass.

Michelle Tam: It’s beautiful though.

Juli Bauer: It is. It is so pretty. Pretty much anywhere in Colorado is pretty no matter where you turn.

Michelle Tam: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: So for everybody who doesn’t know who Michelle Tam is, you can kind of just give a little background about who you are, how you started Just a little background about you.

Michelle Tam: Ok. Well, I was just, I think a regular working mom. And I was working nights; I always tell people I was a drug dealer. And I was. I was a pharmacist at a hospital, and I worked at night. And I think we had two kids, and our second kid turned 3. So at that time, my kids are kind of sleeping through the night. But then my husband and I kind of turned to each other and we were like, ugh. We need to get in shape again. And we didn’t really know what that meant. We were like, oh I think that means counting calories and exercising like crazy. So that’s what I did.

And then Henry, my husband, decided to kind of dabble in different things. I think he discovered P90x, because I guess everybody with kids is like, oh we have to exercise at home. We can buy these DVDs. And he started a blog to kind of keep himself accountable. And he started kind of researching everybody in the P90x videos. And he’d write about them on the blog {laughs}.

And one of the people in the P90x videos was Mark Sisson. So I think when he started kind of Google searching what he was up to, he came across Mark’s Daily Apple. And he was like, huh. This sounds kind of interesting. I’m going to just give this a try. And when he told me about this whole primal/paleo diet thing, I was like, this sounds crazy. It goes against everything I’ve ever learned. And I’m the one who has a nutrition degree, and I work in a hospital. What do you mean whole grains are bad for you? Why are you eating fat again? Why are you eating red meat?

So I tried to sabotage him. But he just kind of kept at it. And he immediately got a 6-pack, which was super annoying. And he started doing CrossFit. And then he started deadlifting like 300 pounds. Crazy stuff. And here I was, totally miserable. Still had my muffin top. I was hungry all the time. And I was finally like; hmm. Maybe I should give this thing a try. Even though I think it sounds really lame. And then when I did it, it felt like I was in the Matrix. I was like, “Oh my gosh, I feel so much better! How come nobody talks about how real food makes such a big difference?” I mean, it’s all such obvious stuff, you know what I mean?

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: Obviously you know. And that was when I started the blog. Because Henry has been blogging for a while. He had this daddy blog, and he had his fitbomb P90X blog. And then I think out of the blue I mentioned. I’m like, “Hey I think I’m going to do like a paleo food blog.” He’s like, really? I’m like yeah. He’s like, what would you call it? I’m like, Nom Nom Paleo. He’s like, ok.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} That’s easy.

Michelle Tam: And then the next day, I guess, he got me a Tumblr site and bought the domain. He’s like, “Here’s you a Tumblr site. It will be really easy for you to post things.” Because he knows I’m not very technical. And so I just started posting stuff. Never expecting anyone would ever read anything. So I used to swear a lot because I couldn’t do it in real life, and I couldn’t do it at work. I was like, I will do it on the internet.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Michelle Tam: It started with me just writing about what I ate every day. Because I was like, I don’t know what people eat on paleo. So maybe this is something useful. And then it kind of morphed into now more evergreen recipe content. But if you go back in my archives, it’s pretty gross. The pictures are terrible. It’s just bad.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, paleo food blogs, when they started, were the most horrendous photos ever. They were so terrible.

Michelle Tam: Except; I think Bill and Hayley.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, they kept their sh*t together.

Michelle Tam: Were probably the one exception, right? Because even from the beginning they had beautiful photos and everything.

Juli Bauer: And they totally think differently, but that’s so not true. Their first cookbook is still so beautiful.

Michelle Tam: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But I think that’s the thing. You just keep at it, and you try to improve, and you work hard at it. That’s kind of; yeah, that’s my story. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: So then your blog obviously grew into two cookbooks. What made you want to write your first cookbook?

Michelle Tam: Well initially we didn’t want to do a cookbook. I think, as soon as paleo started getting more popular, around 2011, 2012. A bunch of people were getting cookbook deals, and we were approached for a cookbook deal. But it wasn’t; like the people who were pitching us were like, “You should do a paleo junk food book!” And I’m like, that’s not really my strength. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: So then Henry, who is always very particular about how things look and the stuff we make. He was like; no, let’s do our own thing. And I think we ended up seeing some article in the New York Times about how apps were the new cookbook and print cookbooks were going to be the way of the dinosaur and cookbook apps were the way to go. So we were like; oh, we should do a cookbook app. We had just gotten an iPad, and we’re like, this thing is amazing!

So we created a cookbook app, but we didn’t realize how crazy expensive it is if you’re not a developer. How much upkeep there is. How people don’t want to pay more than 99 cents for it.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Yeah.

Michelle Tam: So I think the first time after our app came out. And Apple came out with a new iOS update, which breaks your app every time.

Juli Bauer: Oh my gosh.

Michelle Tam: We were like, huh. I think we want to do a physical cookbook. Just because I think there’s something about a physical cookbook. And I collect tons and tons of cookbooks. I was like, I would just like this thing kind of forever.

So then we just started working on one on our own. Because Henry was determined to do the whole self-publishing thing. And then our publisher reached out when we were probably like 80% done with our first cookbook. And basically gave us an offer we couldn’t refuse, where they kind of gave us all creative control but they would help us with editing and all this stuff we didn’t know. Our first cookbook came out. And we were like, this was a lot of work. I don’t know if we’re going to do a second one. But then three years later, we came out with a second one. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: I know. And I don’t think people quite; if they’ve never written a cookbook, they don’t understand how much work goes into a cookbook. And the amount of work you put in your cookbook is 4 billion steps above anyone else, and that’s broad to say. But I say that because you take photos of every single step of every single recipe. So for everything to look nice, and the lighting to be correct, and food placement to be perfect for every single step of every single recipe is out of control. I can’t believe you do that for both cookbooks.

Michelle Tam: Well, I mean, that is Henry. Henry is kind of crazy and amazing. He has a real job, and it’s like a hard job. And then when he’s not at work, he helps do all the graphics, and photos, and design, and cartoons, and stuff for Nom Nom Paleo. So whenever people talk about the photos, and the step by step, and all that. I’m like, that’s Henry. He just likes things a certain way, and that’s how we do it.

That’s also why when you’re like, “Oh, it’s all beautiful.” I’m like, actually, if you take a quick look at our book; or a closer look. I mean, I think a quick look you might miss it. But a closer look, you’ll see that I have bedhead in most of the pictures. I have glasses, I’m in my pajamas. Sometimes the caption for the photo is over my face because I insisted. I was like, Henry, you have to cover my face in this picture because I just woke up.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Michelle Tam: {laughs} And I’ve had people tell me, too. They’re like, you know what’s so great about your book? It’s not so much the step by step pictures, which is unusual. But it’s the fact that you just look so real in this cookbook, and you’re not all glamourous looking.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Michelle Tam: I’m like, well, that’s {laughing} because we’re taking pictures.

Juli Bauer: Those great compliments.

Michelle Tam: I know, I know. I’m like, no it’s true. Because it’s like when I wake up in the morning and on the weekends and at night. And it’s just whenever we’re working on it. And I don’t have time to get all glamourous. Because number one, I’m a mess when it comes to that. But it’s also just kind of our reality.

Juli Bauer: How many months; or did it take more than months, to create both of your cookbooks? Was it a couple of years? Like after you wrote your first one, how long until you started writing your second one?

Michelle Tam: I think we kind of always bank recipes without knowing what we’re going to do with them. Just because we’re always taking pictures, and perfecting things, and tinkering with things. So this latest book really did take like 3 years. So if you even look at the pictures, you’ll see that my kids look really young and babyish {laughing} in some of the photos. And in other ones, they look like little adults. And it’s because it’s taken that long. My hair I think turned grey in the whole process, so you’ll see that my hair is turning grey.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Michelle Tam: Now it’s black again, because I started dying it. {laughing} So yeah, it’s taken a while. And it’s good, because our publisher did not; they understand our process. They’re like, ok whenever it’s done, we’re cool with it. We’re like, ok.

Juli Bauer: That’s awesome.

Michelle Tam: Because initially we were like, we’re not doing a second one. Our first one is it. And now that we’ve done the second one, Henry’s like, “we have to do a third, just to complete the trilogy.” I’m like, I am not even ready to start. There’s no amnesia yet. I’m still in it. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah. When you started writing your first cookbook, had you gone full time into blogging and writing cookbooks?

Michelle Tam: No.

Juli Bauer: When did you quit your pharmaceutical job?

Michelle Tam: I quit my drug-dealing job 2.5 years ago.

Juli Bauer: Ok.

Michelle Tam: And our book came out December 2013. So we were working; I was working nights, and we were doing the cookbook and everything on the side. Henry had his day job, and we had our kids. And so I think after the book came out; it’s so funny, because with my night schedule, I would work 7 nights in a row and then I had 7 off. I was like, “Oh this is perfect. I’ll work nights, and then in my week off I’ll do book tour stuff.” {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Oh man.

Michelle Tam: Now in hindsight, I’m like, that was insane.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: Because I never saw my kids. And I think that was kind of; with all the book tour stuff, and I think our app was nominated for a Webby award. That was kind of the tipping point. They weren’t sure they could get coverage for me so I could attend the Webby awards. And I was like, I can’t believe I might miss attending the Webby awards to work a night shift at the hospital. And that was when I was like, “I’m going to quit my job!” Even though, I was like, I’m not sure. As a good Chinese immigrant kid, I can’t quit. Because I need something stable. But I think; I still have my license. But I’m pretty happy with how things are right now. And not working nights.

Juli Bauer: And how do your parents feel? You said immigrant parents. How do your parents feel about your type of job nowadays?

Michelle Tam: You know, they’re better with it I think because they know our book has sold. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah, I get that.

Michelle Tam: I think it would be really different if I wasn’t making money. But at the same time, Henry still has his job. So I think in their mind, everything is ok. We have health insurance. You know what I mean?

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: And, they know I still have an active license.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} You can fall back.

Michelle Tam: If it all exploded, I could go back to dealing drugs.

Juli Bauer: And that kind of made me think of a question someone asked. They asked, she was asking, with you having traditional Asian parents, do you ever deal with anything when you’re going out to eat or just what they grew up on when it comes to soy. Do you deal with any issues with your parents with that kind of related; food related stuff.

Michelle Tam: Yeah, for sure initially. I think they thought we were crazy. And they were like, “But you’ve eaten this your whole life. How can this be bad for you?” And I’m like, at the same time, don’t you remember when I was a kid and I would have stomach pains all the time you’d take me to the doctor and they’d rule out appendicitis, and they would just say it was gas. Do you know what I mean? And we’d be like, “Ok.” And I’d go to the doctor all the time. All of these ailments I had my whole life.

I had a canker sore in my mouth every single day ever since I can remember until I went paleo. And I’d have all this GI stuff. And I thought I had food poisoning all the time. All that stuff went away when I changed what I ate. And that’s kind of when I think they understood, “Oh, ok.” But I do think sometimes other relatives can also take it personally. Because they’re like, what do you mean this food that you grew up on isn’t ok for you? I’m like, no it’s not the food. It’s not the dishes.

That’s why I try to create paleo versions of the dishes, so I can still enjoy them. Because there’s a lot of dishes where I’m like, “Oh this brings back so many memories.” But if I were to eat the real thing, I would not feel good. But I also think, just like most immigrant parents. I think if you have success, then they’re like, “Oh ok.” {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Yes.

Michelle Tam: I guess it’s alright. But I think if I was struggling, and it was all; they would be like, maybe you should go back to working nights.

Juli Bauer: {laughing} So have you raised your kids mostly paleo? I know you’ve talked about they eat different things. But how have you raised your kids to hopefully still eat vegetables and understand better food choices, and then let them free into the actual real world of whatever sh*t is at their actual school and whatever else when they’re going out with friends, and birthday parties, and everything else.

Michelle Tam: So I think it is; it’s a hard thing. Because initially Henry and I were the only ones that were paleo. And we were kind of cooking our kids whatever. It was still kind of whole grain; gluten free mac and cheese. Whatever it was. It was “healthy” but it was not stuff that we would eat. But everyone kept on asking me on the blog, what do your kids eat? What do your kids eat? And I’m like, this is not about my kids. This is about me and what I eat.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. {laughs}

Michelle Tam: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Mind your business.

Michelle Tam: Right. But then I started realizing; no, it’s kind of true. Why is it that I won’t eat my kid’s leftovers, and it’s ok for me to serve it to them? I’m tired of being a short order cooked. And I think finally I just had to kind of confront it. So then when we did, we were like, “Ok we’re going to do one family meal. Whatever I make is what everyone is going to eat.” But there was some compromise. So instead of making like super spicy, or super weird stuff that I tend to do if Henry and I are eating alone. It was like, ok we have make stuff like crackling chicken, or roasted broccoli. Things that I think the kids would be more accepting of.

And definitely, like my older son is a people pleaser. And he’s like, “Oh this is all delicious. Whatever you make. You can make offal, and you can make gizzards, I will eat.” Whereas my younger son is like, “What do you mean we can’t have mac and cheese anymore? I don’t like the stuff that you’re serving me. This is gross.”

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Michelle Tam: So there was, like for him, we kind of had this little bridge where we kind of compromised. Where if he didn’t like what we were eating. And he was super stubborn. And one day, while I was sleeping because I was working that night, Henry was like, “OK, I’ll take care of it. We’ll just go cold turkey.” And he basically told Ollie, who was like 3 or 4 at the time. “OK, this is our house, you have to live by our rules. And you’re going to eat what I’m going to make you.” And Ollie stormed outside, and was like, “Then I’m leaving!”

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Michelle Tam: Henry’s like, huh. Let’s figure out what we’re going to do. So he loves scrambled eggs, and he loves roasted broccoli. So roasted broccoli is kind of like a default vegetable we always have anyway. And a scrambled egg doesn’t take that much time to make. So if he didn’t love whatever we were eating; he’d have to try it, but then we’d make him a fried egg. And he’d have roasted broccoli. And we did that breakfast lunch and dinner until finally he got sick of it. And now he does eat what we make. And he asserts his independence by just eating super, duper slow. To the point where the fat congeals on the plate.

Juli Bauer: Oh my god! {laughing}

Michelle Tam: I know, it’s gross. But he’ll eat it. We’re cool with how things are. And obviously, we’re not perfectly paleo. But when we’re at home, we do eat mostly paleo. Because when we go out; we just, like, the two of us, Ollie and I, have to be gluten free. Whereas my older son, he’s kind of like Henry where he could eat anything. But because he’s kind of going through puberty, he’s discovered that if he eats paleo, his skin is better. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Oh. Yeah.

Michelle Tam: So that matters now, because of girls.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. That’s awesome that he’s noticed that.

Michelle Tam: Right. I’ve even told him; you know, you think the stuff mommy says is crazy, but here. While we were traveling you were eating like crazy. And then when we come back, and you’re eating the stuff I’m cooking you and you’re taking these crazy probiotic dirt pills, your skin has cleared up. Isn’t that crazy? {laughs} So I think he kind of begrudgingly, kind of is like, ok you’re right.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. {laughs}

Michelle Tam: And you know, they’re kids, but I think they know. And we always try to say; it’s not so much that you can’t ever have this. But hey, when you have this, this is how you feel an hour or two afterwards. Especially with Ollie and the gluten. He would get stomachaches and canker sores. And his personality would change. So we would say, hey look. Look what happens when you have this stuff. So he himself is really good about self-regulating.

When we go to a party, like a lot of times we’ll feed him ahead of time. But even at the party, he’s like, no the food is gross. It’s like some lame pizza or some bounce house or whatever. He’s like, it’s cool. I’ll come and eat whatever. And a lot of times, if they have cake, I’ll make sure that he has a gluten-free cupcake or something just so he doesn’t feel left out.

Juli Bauer: That’s awesome. It was crazy, you saying the canker sore thing. Because I grew up the same way. In and out of the hospital constantly with stomach aches. And they would pump me with fluid. And I had canker sores all the time growing up. And I never even put that. I always put the stomach aches together. But I have not had a canker sore in like years and years now, since being paleo. And I can’t believe I never kind of put that two and two together.

Michelle Tam: Me neither! I remember I would have them all the time. And I remember, I would ask my friends, “Do you guys have canker sores?” They’d be like, no is that a cold sore? Like, no, no! It’s different. {laughs} it’s in your mouth. It’s not herpes simplex. And I remember going to pharmacy school and looking up what causes them, and how do I treat them. And every journal article I looked up was like, they’re called aphthous ulcers, and they don’t know what causes them. And I’m like, ok. I just was like, whatever. It’s just something that I have.

Now, apparently there’s a big link with celiac disease, and I don’t know. For me, I was like, I don’t understand why I would just think. You have the same lining from your mouth to your butt. The same mucous lining through your whole intestines. And I don’t understand why I thought the sores would just be isolated to my mouth. Do you know what I mean?

Juli Bauer: Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Michelle Tam: So I’m sure there’s all sorts of stuff that was going on in my gut. And because I took out gluten and other processed foods, I just felt so much better.

Juli Bauer: That is so crazy. I never even thought of that.

Michelle Tam: It is. It’s crazy. There are so many things. It’s like why; it seems so obvious. But I was just like, oh no. Whatever people say is healthy. Whatever the doctor says is healthy, I’ll just go with it. And I won’t even think about how I feel. {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Yeah. And obviously you’ve posted pictures. Especially when you’re traveling and you’re going to different places. I think you eat; like most people who do paleo and have been doing it for many years. You eat mostly paleo at home, but then when you’re traveling you do more gluten free things. Like a gluten free bun or you go to a bakery. So for your overall lifestyle, do you eat gluten free as much as possible or 100% of the time. Do you do this 80/20 that some people do? What is the best way for you?

Michelle Tam: For me, I have to be gluten free 100% of the time. And then in terms of; when I’m traveling I’m like, oh I’m going to try this gluten free whatever. Just because there’s no paleo restaurants in most places that you visit. So I try to post stuff, just so people can see what their options can be.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: Obviously, when I was traveling for like 4 weeks straight, and I was just. I mean, I was like, I can’t just eat gluten free buns and all this other stuff. Because I just wasn’t feeling great. So that’s when I would go to a Whole Foods and just get a bunch of salads and then other things that I knew were “clean”. Just because I was like, I’m sick of eating all of this stuff. Because anytime you go out to eat, there’s all sorts of weird stuff. As good as you’re trying to be, unless you’re cooking your own food, you don’t really know what’s in there.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: And people are like, where else do you go when you go out to eat? I’m like, well I do a ton of research. That’s what I love to do. I love being in my hotel room and being able to search and search and search for a great place for me to go. But a lot of times, I will go to a vegan place or a vegetarian place just because I know I can get lots of vegetables. They are totally cool with weird dietary restrictions. And then if I need some protein later I can stop by the store and get some prosciutto or some chicken breast or something to supplement it.

Juli Bauer: So you guys live; not full time. Is it Palo Alto?

Michelle Tam: Mm-hmm.

Juli Bauer: Ok. And then you have another house in Portland, right?

Michelle Tam: Yes. But we’re not in Portland as much as I would like.

Juli Bauer: Yes.

Michelle Tam: So whenever the kids have breaks, we are in Portland. We’re trying to figure all of it out. And figure out how we can; I would love to move to Portland permanently. But Henry has his job here. And we have elderly parents. So we’ve got to just figure it out. But I love being able to get away to Portland.

Juli Bauer: Portland is the best.

Michelle Tam: I know.

Juli Bauer: ` It’s just the weirdest coolest most delicious place. I try to go there every year, just like Austin. I love going to Austin, too. Do you have a top 3; and I know restaurants are coming in every single day to Portland and there’s something new to try every time you go back, I’m sure. But do you have your top 3 restaurants that you always go to whenever you’re in town in Portland?

Michelle Tam: Well, Departure.

Juli Bauer: Departure, of course.

Michelle Tam: I love. I have more than 3. But I love Ox. I love Nong’s Khao Man Gai. Like, her chicken rice is amazing.

Juli Bauer: I want to go there so bad!

Michelle Tam: Oh, and they have a paleo version. She has gluten free sauces. She doesn’t charge extra for gluten free, which I was like, oh you’re so cool.

Juli Bauer: That’s awesome.

Michelle Tam: And then if you want a fancy place that you can wear jeans to, Castanya is really good. There are so many places. Tusk just opened up and that’s really good. That’s why I have that #nomnomeatspdx. To put all the places that we go to. And then there’s casual places.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: There’s a burger place we always go to called PDX Sliders.

Juli Bauer: OK.

Michelle Tam: And I’m always trying to find new places. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah. That’s like my favorite thing to do. I look a lot on your page if I’m going to Portland. I’ll look on see where you’ve gone. Do you like to go to more Asian style places that offer gluten free? Is that your first place you look, or is it kind of any sort of food out there that has gluten free options? When you’re traveling and looking for restaurants.

Michelle Tam: I think any sort of food. But I think because it’s so hard to eat Asian food gluten free, if there’s a place that has it available and it’s supposed to be good, I want to check it out. Just to try it, because it’s been a long time since I’ve had Asian food at a restaurant. But like bamboo sushi in Portland.

Juli Bauer: So good.

Michelle Tam: All of their sauces are by default are gluten free. And I’m like, amazing! And all their fish is sustainable.

Juli Bauer: And their sweet and sour cauliflower.

Michelle Tam: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: OH my god. To die. To die!

Michelle Tam: And they have a new Bamboo Sushi in Denver! Like a little tiny one.

Juli Bauer: I know! It’s in this little place called Avanti, which has a bunch of different restaurants in moving crates, kind of cafeteria style.

Michelle Tam: Yeah, we went there. And we took a pic. But it was so crowded. We were like, dude it’s crazy here.

Juli Bauer: I know. It’s so weird. It’s like hit or miss. Sometimes it’s crazy and sometimes it’s not. But I heard it wasn’t doing very well.

Michelle Tam: Oh.

Juli Bauer: So I don’t know if it was just the location, because it was upstairs instead of downstairs. But I heard it wasn’t doing well. And I haven’t been to it still just because parking is madness around there.

Michelle Tam: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Juli Bauer: But Bamboo is so good in Portland. I love going there. I went there with Kiera.

Michelle Tam: Yeah. Kiera’s got; whenever I’m like, what are the new cool places to go to? Kiera’s got the hook up. And, you know who else? Diane Sanfilippo. Even though she doesn’t go there that often, has very strong opinions about where she likes to eat. Like Ox is her number one favorite.

Juli Bauer: I can’t believe I haven’t been there. That was on my list. And there’s just too many to hit, and I didn’t hit there last time I went.

Michelle Tam: Ox is great. But you need more than 2 people to kind of fully enjoy the whole menu. Just because there are so many things to try.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Is there any kind of food you don’t like eating? Is there anything; I’m a no eggplant type of person. I haven’t been impressed by eggplant ever. Is there anything you don’t like?

Michelle Tam: I love eggplant. I’m pretty open to most things. I don’t love uni, but I’ll still eat it. And I used to think I hated olives, but I realized I was just eating the wrong ones.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: But I’m pretty open to most things, I think.

Juli Bauer: I want to kind of talk about your website. Because obviously your website has been so popular and so amazing over the years. I’m sure you’ve run into all different sorts of issues. Because you used to have a Tumblr site, and then you moved it over to a regular.

Michelle Tam: WordPress. And that was just; I want to say less than a year ago.

Juli Bauer: Was that a hard move?

Michelle Tam: It was a hard move. We hired a guy to help us. And it was hard just because we had so many; I think we had thousands of posts. And Tumblr is just not; I mean, we were cool with Tumblr because it was free. We’re like, oh we don’t have to pay for hosting. We’re so cheap and stuff. But there’s nothing you can customize on Tumblr, really. We would try to hack things, and Henry would Google how to do things. Because he’s not technical either, but he’s really good at finding things out on Google. But I think we were like; well, I think Tumblr will probably go away eventually. You know what I mean?

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: So we got to port things over. And we were just getting hit by sorts of SEO stuff, because we couldn’t do any SEO stuff. And yeah. We just finally bit the bullet. We knew we had to eventually move over, we just didn’t know when. And then I think when Yahoo bought Tumblr, and we’re like yay! But then now Yahoo I think is on the decline. So we’re like, ok we’ve got to pony up and switch it.

But Tumblr also is blocked on; because I mean they allow all sorts of things on Tumblr. {laughs} So whenever people would look at it at work, they’d be like, “We’d can’t see your site.” And I’m like, sorry! But now I think they can. Just because we’re on WordPress.

Juli Bauer: Interesting. I had no idea. Whenever people say they can’t see my site, I think it’s because of the cusswords I use throughout.

Michelle Tam: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: But I use asterisks, so it’s not even the full word. But who knows. Maybe.

Michelle Tam: I don’t know. Who knows. And I was like; why are you looking at it at work? Maybe you should look at it on your phone. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughing} Exactly.

Michelle Tam: You can still do it at work, but do it on your phone.

Juli Bauer: Exactly. So what do you think; I know you obviously probably have thousands of posts on your website. And I kind of hate…

Michelle Tam: No. I have thousands of posts, but I don’t have thousands of recipes. You are way more prolific than I am. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Ok. Well that’s because you were writing two of the most complicated cookbooks in the history of time. I can’t imagine. How many recipes do you have between the two of those books?

Michelle Tam: I think 300 between the two, ish. Not as many as I think there are. {laughing}

Juli Bauer: There are still a ton. A ton. And people, what you get in this cookbook. What people will see, other than just the photo by photo instructions, you get a ton of kind of comics. And your husband is the one who creates all of those, right?

Michelle Tam: Yes. Again, he is super hard working, but he’s also; he’s left brained and also right brained. So he can do analytical stuff in his real work, and then he can come home and draw super cute cartoons. Yeah.

Juli Bauer: So when you work on your website, if you have any graphics that you need, you just go to him and say, “Hey can you make this quick graphic? This is what I’m thinking.”

Michelle Tam: Yes. Totally. I’ll be like, can you have me, cartoon Michelle, say this, and have her hands like this, and her face like this. And he’s like ok. Because actually when we were working on the second cookbook; for the first cookbook, all of the cartoons he actually drew by hand. And then he had to scan them in the computer, and it was just a ton of work. So he knew for the second cookbook, if we were going to have cartoons, that he had to stream line it in a certain way. So he actually made kind of these paper doll versions of all four of us. Me and him and the two kids. Where we had all these different facial expressions. Different clothes, and different ways our hands were. And so he can kind of move like a face, and match it with a different shirt to kind of create different cartoons. Which I don’t know how he did that, but he did.

Juli Bauer: Whoa. That is insane.

Michelle Tam: I know. It’s insane!

Juli Bauer: How is it working and still working together. But on the cookbook, and then just kind of working together on the website. Have you guys run into any issues working together or has it been pretty easy going, because you guys are obviously pretty good at marriage.

Michelle Tam: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Michelle Tam: Well you know, we joke that when I was working nights for 12 years, we were like ships in the night. I’d work a night, and I’d see him in the morning and stuff. And every other week, we’d see each other again. And we were like, maybe that was the secret to our marriage was that we barely saw each other.

Juli Bauer: Totally! {laughs}

Michelle Tam: {laughs} But I think we work really well together because we care passionately about things the other person doesn’t care about. So he is really set on making sure the pictures and the cartoons and the layout are just how he likes them. And when he asks me, I’m like, I don’t care. However you want to do it is cool with me. And I really care about the recipes working, and tasting good, and he doesn’t care about that part at all. And it’s really funny because sometimes we’ll be working on a recipe. And he’ll be taking pictures of everything. And I’m not ready for it to be posted. And he’ll be like; “no, stop here because I have the perfect picture.” And I’m like, no. It’s not ready. I can’t publish it yet. He’s like, don’t worry, just publish it, and if it doesn’t work, people will just blame themselves.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Michelle Tam: I’m like, no. It doesn’t work like that. Because I handle all the social media and the email and everything. And trust me. When things don’t work, people blame me. And they blame me in all caps.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Michelle Tam: So {laughs} he’s like, ok fine, you do your thing and I’ll do my thing. So I think it’s good because I trust him to do what he does, and he trusts me to do what I do, and we’re cool with how things turn out.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, that’s bad ass. Like Bill and Hayley, from Primal Palate. They can work together too. It amazes me when couples can work together and they can make it work and not drive each other completely insane. So congratulations on that feat. {laughs}

Michelle Tam: Well, thank you. But at the same time, he does. He’s not here. It’s not like I spend all day with him. He’s at work and stuff. So I don’t know how it would work if he were here and this was his full-time gig. I don’t know, maybe it would not work.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. So he’s a 9-5 Monday through Friday at work.

Michelle Tam: Well, it’s probably longer than that.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: He’s gone, he comes back at dinner time. And then he’s like, now I’m going to start my second job. And he’s just always grinding. And it makes me feel like I’m not working hard enough.

Juli Bauer: Damn, that’s crazy. That’s so much work.

Michelle Tam: It is.

Juli Bauer: But you guys work very well together, which is awesome. And now that you’re done with book tour; are you totally done with book tour, for your second book?

Michelle Tam: I have some events kind of trickling in. But most of it is done. I have some travel this weekend and on some upcoming weekends. But most of it is done. Which is nice.

Juli Bauer: So now are you kind of back to just working on the website? Working on new posts there? What’s your day to day like when you’re not on book tour or working on a cookbook?

Michelle Tam: So, day to day is I kind of try to fit everything in while the kids are at school. Or we start working when they’re asleep. But I kind of have set things I have to do. There’s always an Instagram post I’m putting up. I do Instagram stories about stuff I’m cooking. Wednesday I always have a Facebook live. So I’m always kind of prepping up until Wednesday for that. It always seems so spontaneous, but it’s not. Like, today I have one and I already cooked the dish ahead of time last night, and I have it all prepped to show this afternoon.

Juli Bauer: Totally. I don’t know how you guys do those Facebook lives. When I talked to Cassy from Fed and Fit about it she was like, they are just so much work! She was like, they’re worth it, but they’re so much work!

Michelle Tam: I think a podcast is more work.

Juli Bauer: Oh, no way. I’m in my pajamas on the couch with my do.

Michelle Tam: No it is. We kind of still have a podcast, but we put up a new episode every time our kids voice changes because it’s that long.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Michelle Tam: I think the Facebook live is hard in that you just need to make sure things are prepped. But then you just press play, and whatever happens happens.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: But, you know, and then there’s always set stuff I have on certain days. And I’m always responding to people emailing me and messaging me. There’s always recipe development stuff for the blog or other projects I’m working on. There’s always something.

Juli Bauer: Always something.

Michelle Tam: There’s always something.

Juli Bauer: Do you concentrate much on social media? Getting a certain amount of posts up or a certain time of day? Or do you kind of just concentrate on your website and books and that Facebook live? Or your just scheduled that you panned out for yourself.

Michelle Tam: So we are really bad about having an editorial calendar. A lot of things we do on the fly all the time. But in terms of; I really love Instagram and so I’m always, I always try to post at least one thing on the main Instagram. And then I kind of show people stuff on the Instagram stories. Facebook, we put stuff on there. But that I don’t love Facebook just because.

Juli Bauer: It’s the worst.

Michelle Tam: It can be the worst depending on many factors. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Yeah.

Michelle Tam: We have a guy in Phoenix who helps me schedule things on Facebook. And on Facebook, it’s mostly me sharing other people’s recipes, sharing some of my recipes, responding to people’s messages. So I’ll kind of send him stuff. I’m like, hey here are things that you can post up later. But I don’t monitor when he posts stuff. And he’ll find stuff that he knows that I’m cool with posting.

So those are kind of the ones. And Twitter, if someone tweets me, I’ll reply. And then in terms of the blog, we try to put new content up once a week. Because we know the blog is kind of the main repository and that’s kind of where people can always find us. But I feel like people aren’t going to the blog as much anymore. Some people just know me from Instagram.

Juli Bauer: Totally.

Michelle Tam: And they’re surprised I have a blog or other things going on. So it’s really interesting how people are consuming their content these days. But I still think the blog is still the core. But you have to have people reach it in different ways.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. I feel like it’s a constant change that you have to find new ways for people to find it. Since it’s more regulated with Facebook and Instagram having that algorithm, and they can’t see it. So you have to find new ways to constantly kind of put your name out there in different ways.

Michelle Tam: Right. But I don’t know how to hashtag it up or do all those things.

Juli Bauer: Me neither.

Michelle Tam: And there are certain times when I’m like, Oh, I think this post will do really well, and it doesn’t. And then something that’s super ugly that I just put will get tons of likes. So it’s a weird; I’m not sure how it works. But at the same time, I’m happy to kind of try to figure out how it works. Right? Because it’s a free tool. So I think instead of; obviously I could just complain and say, oh it sucks. They’re doing this, this, and this. But I’m like, at the same time, I’m not paying for it.

Juli Bauer: I know.

Michelle Tam: And I know they’re trying to make it as useful and interesting for the people who use it. So I’ve got to figure out how to do that.

Juli Bauer: I know. It’s constantly changing.

Michelle Tam: But that’s why; I don’t do Pinterest because that doesn’t really interest me. I know some people love Pinterest, but I’m like; eh. I don’t really know how to use it. And I know that I could be a total time suck. So instead I would rather concentrate on stuff that I actually really like, like Instagram.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, yeah. Absolutely. Well I want to ask you a few questions from readers before I let you go. So I just picked a handful of stuff that we haven’t covered. And this lovely person, they want to know; and I hate this question always because I can never answer it. But, do you have a favorite couple of recipes from your newest cookbook?

Michelle Tam: Ah. I do have a favorite recipe. So I think my all-purpose stir-fry sauce I love, just because it’s so versatile, and it literally takes just a couple of minutes to shake together in a mason jar. And then you can keep it in the fridge for, I say 2 weeks, but you’ll probably be out of it just in a few days. But you can use it for stir fry. And if you don’t know how to make a stir fry, I have a beef and asparagus stir fry step by step recipe in the book, so it can show you kind of the steps to do it, and you can sub in whatever you have.

You can use it as a sauce in paper wrapped chicken, which is another recipe in the cookbook. You can use it as a salad dressing, because I show you how you can use it in this cold ramen salad that’s on the blog. And if you have an Instant Pot, if you just use half a cup of the all-purpose stir fry sauce with any braising cut; pork shoulder or chicken thighs, or chuck roast, you will have a really fantastic stew without thinking about it. So I like that one just because it’s so versatile. And I don’t really have an excuse that I have nothing to cook if I have that sauce.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: And then I also love the chicken and shrimp laap just because it’s fast and easy and the kids will eat it. And I love the desserts. And I don’t normally do desserts, so the ones that are in the cookbook, I tested many, many, many times. {laughs} And I like them.

Juli Bauer: Now I totally want to try that sauce. That sounds awesome. And use it in the Instant Pot.

Michelle Tam: Yeah. If you’re going to just, it literally takes no time. And if you just make one time, you can use it a million different ways.

Juli Bauer: That’s awesome. And I think that kind of leads into this other question. This person asks, “What’s Michelle’s Ride or Die kitchen tools?” She says, “Also please let her know that her Yankee pot roast is the bomb!”

Michelle Tam: {laughs} Oh, well you know I just did an Instant Pot version of that recipe.

Juli Bauer: Oh sweet.

Michelle Tam: I think my favorite kitchen gadget is probably the Instant Pot. They’re not a sponsor. I just think an electric pressure cooker is really amazing.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. You have done so many recipes with the Instant Pot. When I didn’t know how to use my Instant Pot when I first got it, I went and looked at your; not deviled eggs, but steamed eggs, just to see how to work it. Because you had steps by steps, to make sure you don’t blow your house up. Because it’s so scary and terrifying when you first get an Instant Pot. But you have so many different Instant Pot recipes.

Michelle Tam: But once you use it, you’re like, “Oh my gosh, this power is amazing!” You know what I mean?

Juli Bauer: Yeah, it’s awesome.

Michelle Tam: You can do so many things, and it frees you up. And I feel like it delivers on the promise that everyone thinks a slow cooker will do. Right? I think everyone who has a slow cooker is like, “I can dump all this crap in, and when I come home 10-12 hours later, it will be delicious.” And it’s never that way. It’s always watery, overcooked, powdery, gross. Right?

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: But I feel with an instant pot, because you’re cooking under pressure, and you can cook it fast and keep it warm, it does taste delicious. And that’s what they use on Top Chef and all these cooking shows. These cooking contests. They break out a pressure cooker when they want to make a stew and something fast and delicious. And I was like, if they’re using it, we should use it at home.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: And then what else do I love? I love my cast iron skillet.

Juli Bauer: Always.

Michelle Tam: I think my Instant Pot is probably my favorite thing.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: And I love tongs. I think those are really easy to flip things and grab things.

Juli Bauer: Shred things. And here, I have two more questions for you. The first one, she asks, “I notice you check your blood sugar a lot. Do you follow the keto diet? How has this changed your life more since going paleo?” Because I remember seeing some videos of you checking your blood sugar. What has that kind of introduced you do and a little better understanding of your own body?

Michelle Tam: I don’t really check my blood sugar so much anymore. I think when I got a glucose monitor after I read Robb Wolf’s newest book, Wired to Eat, because he recommends people get one just to see how they respond to certain carbs and certain dishes. And everybody is different. And the only way for you to really know how you react to certain foods is to test your blood sugar.

And at first I didn’t want to because I was like, I don’t want to prick my finger. But then I think one of my friends was like, come on. Stop being such a baby. Go and check it so you’ll know. And it was really eye opening for me. Because there were certain things that I thought I could eat all the time. I thought I could eat white rice and rice noodles, because I’m Chinese. And I’m like, oh my people have been eating this for thousands of years. I’m sure I’m genetically made to eat white rice. But when I check my blood sugar two hours after having a bowl of Pho, not only was I falling asleep, when I checked my blood sugar it was still 200-something. Which is really high. It should drop back down to 100 or whatever your normal is, but it doesn’t.

And I know I have type 2 diabetes in my family, and my 23andMe told me I was predisposed to get type 2 diabetes. But until I checked my blood sugar, I was like; oh. Maybe I shouldn’t eat white rice so much.

Juli Bauer: Interesting.

Michelle Tam: Or if I do, I have make sure it’s a small portion and I eat protein and fat along with it. I don’t eat keto. I probably eat a low-carb diet, just by default. And I think I feel better when I eat lower carb. But I haven’t done full on keto. I think to do keto you have to really make sure you do it correctly. Because you could eat certain things and it could throw you out of ketosis.

Juli Bauer: Totally.

Michelle Tam: And I think a lot of the counting; counting calories and all that obsessive stuff that I was doing before. Anything that reminds me of that, I don’t like. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah, for sure.

Michelle Tam: But I know that keto works for a lot of people. And for a lot of people, nothing else has worked and keto has worked great. But I am a strong believer that everybody is different. And you have to find what works best for you.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, absolutely. And this last question, before I let you go and move on with your day and get prepped and ready for your Facebook live. This one is another one from a reader, and she says, “My question is how she works exercise into her life and maintains balance, especially while traveling.” So what are you doing for exercise now? Are you still kind of doing CrossFit? Do you guys workout at your house? What do you do?

Michelle Tam: Our house is totally outfitted. Our garage has all sorts of rogue stuff and we have, what is that? That assault back.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, the Airdyne.

Michelle Tam: Yes. Ok. So we have that and a rowing machine. So we have all the things. I have a guy that comes out and he makes me do kind of old lady CrossFit. It’s like Olympic lifting, and we’ll do some sort of metabolic conditioning at the end, but no throwing any weight around at the end when I do metabolic conditioning. Because I’ve told him, I just want to be stronger but I don’t want to get hurt. Because I’m old.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. {laughs}

Michelle Tam: And he’s been really good about that. And I also do; there’s this book called the Happy Body that I found out about on the Tim Ferris podcast, which sounds all kooky and stuff. And the book itself is kind of kooky. But it’s basically doing mobility stuff every day. And I was like, oh this is good. Because I really need to do more mobility stuff that I can ensure that I can even lift properly, right?

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: So those are the kind of things. And I do long walks. And I run with my kid to school when we’re late. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughing} That’s awesome. Well I’m glad you have the stuff at home that you can do because that makes it so much easier. I think a lot of people are kind of turning towards more garaged gyms and things they can do at home because lives are so damn busy.

Michelle Tam: Yeah. And there’s definitely; there’s all these body weight things that I can totally work on. Like, I can’t do a pistol. And you don’t need any equipment for that, you know what I mean?

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Michelle Tam: There’s definitely things where I’m like; I’ve got to work on my pushups, and I’ve got to work on planks. I’ve got to squat more. And you don’t need, there’s no excuse not to do some of those things.

Juli Bauer: Totally. That’s awesome. Well will you tell everyone where they can find you and your cookbooks? And give us all information about you. I think it’s pretty easy to find you nowadays, because your names are pretty much the same all the way around.

Michelle Tam: Yeah. Nom Nom Paleo is where you can find all my stuff. Or most social media, I’m Nom Nom Paleo. Except for Snapchat, because someone stole it, and they don’t let you get it back. But now I’m not on Snapchat anymore {laughs}.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, I’m not either.

Michelle Tam: I do Instagram stories.

Juli Bauer: Exactly.

Michelle Tam: I know. And I was so excited because it was so cool. And then Instagram stories came, and I’m like, I’m just going to stay here. I don’t have to convince anyone to adopt a new platform. But yeah, my books are sold wherever books are sold.

Juli Bauer: And your first cookbook is Nom Nom Paleo, and your second one is Ready or Not, correct?

Michelle Tam: Yes.

Juli Bauer: Ok, perfect.

Michelle Tam: One is red, one is yellow.

Juli Bauer: Yes. And they are bright colors. They are beautiful. Everyone will love them, I can promise you that. So stay on the line, Michelle. Thank you so much for coming. You’re the best. Seriously, if people haven’t checked you out. You’re so hilarious. And I appreciate you so much for coming on because you’re a badass chick that has motivated me from the start of paleo.

Michelle Tam: Thank you. I feel the same way about you. Thank you.

Juli Bauer: Ah, you’re such a gem. Ok stay on the line, I’ll talk to you guys later. Bye-bye!

In this podcast, I’m chatting with the great Michelle Tam from! Michelle’s blog was one of the first paleo blogs I came across when I started paleo and she continues to crush it in the blog and cookbook world. […] In this podcast, I’m chatting with the great Michelle Tam from! Michelle’s blog was one of the first paleo blogs I came across when I started paleo and she continues to crush it in the blog and cookbook world. […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 59:24
Mike from ButcherBox – Episode 52: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 30 Sep 2017 13:09:23 +0000 18 So excited to chat with the owner and creator of ButcherBox! I have been receiving ButcherBox since March and have absolutely loved it. I constantly have meat in my freezer and everything always tastes amazing. Hope you guys enjoy his story! ____________ Big […] So excited to chat with the owner and creator of ButcherBox! I have been receiving ButcherBox since March and have absolutely loved it. I constantly have meat in my freezer and everything always tastes amazing. Hope you guys enjoy his story!


Big Thank You to Our Sponsor – ButcherBox

ButcherBox sources and delivers the best quality grass-fed, grass-finished, antibiotic and hormone-free, pasture-raised beef, chicken and pork straight to your doorstep. And getting your ButcherBox is super easy – just select your box, customize it to your liking, and then set your schedule of how often you want to receive your ButcherBox. They offer free shipping to the contiguous 48 states and each classic box is filled with 8-11 pounds of meat. They also just launched their custom box so customers can actually choose everything that comes in their box! And right now, PaleOMG Uncensored listeners can get $10 off their first order PLUS 2 FREE grass fed, grass finished ribeyes! Click here to receive this special offer!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 52 Transcription!

I am so excited to tell you about this month’s sponsor, because it’s something I use in my daily life and have loved so much that I’ve talked about it on my blog and Instagram a ton. If you’ve ever had a hard time finding high quality, grass-fed, and pasture raised meat at the grocery store, ButcherBox is here to make the experience so much easier.

Not only does ButcherBox source the best quality beef, chicken, and pork that is humanely raised and free of antibiotics and hormones, but they also deliver straight to your doorstep. They take any of the guess work out of finding high quality meat at the grocery store, and instead all you have to do is open your box filled with dry ice and find different cuts of meat.

The process is super easy. All you have to do is select your box, customize it to your liking, and then set your schedule of how often you want to receive your ButcherBox. They offer free shipping to the contiguous 48 states and each classic box is filled with 8 to 11 pounds of meat.

They also launched their custom box, so customers can actually choose everything that comes in their box. Right now, PaleOMG Uncensored listeners can get $10 off their first order; plus two free grass-fed grass-finished ribeyes. I’ve loved all of the different cuts of meat I’ve tried. I’ve heard their breakfast sausage is amazing. I’ve loved their thinly sliced beef and their ground beef. I use it almost every day. And you guys can now try it, too.

All you have to do is go to and pick the perfect box for you. That’s it. and you’ll get $10 off your first order plus 2 free ribeyes. And since I love ButcherBox so much, I asked the creator, Mike Salguero, to come on the podcast and share his story of creating such an amazing business. I hope you guys enjoy.

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: Hey everyone! Thank you guys for coming on to PaleOMG Uncensored, another episode. I have no idea what number we’re on at this point. Because today I have a very special guest. His name is Mike; how do you say your last name, Mike?

Mike Salguero: Salguero.

Juli Bauer: Ok, that’s how I was going to say it. So I’m glad I wouldn’t have butchered that. But we have Mike Salguero from ButcherBox on today. I’m very excited to talk to him because I have been using ButcherBox for I would say 6 to 8 months at this point, and have absolutely loved all of the products. So we’re going to talk about how the company came to be. I talk about a special discount at the beginning of this episode, anyway.

So let’s talk about ButcherBox. So Mike; thank you so much for being on today.

Mike Salguero: Yeah, thank you.

Juli Bauer: I really appreciate you talking the time out of your busy schedule. So will you just give people listening just kind of a tour of you. Who you are, how you came into ButcherBox, and just a little background about the company and how you started this business; I think starting a family at the same time.

Mike Salguero: Yeah. Sure. So I live in Boston. That’s where our company, ButcherBox, is headquartered. And I got into grass-fed beef really through different diets. So I was looking at your blog. I was looking at Whole30. And diet after diet would say you should eat grass-fed beef. And I couldn’t really find a great way to buy grass-fed beef. At the time, my wife was pregnant with our first child. I started becoming obsessed with, “Alright, let me find some really amazing beef.”

I ended up meeting a farmer who was in New York, and used to sell what they call cow shares. Like an eighth of a cow or a quarter of a cow, where that’s like a trash bag of meat. And they would deliver it to my house. And it never fit into my tiny city apartment, into the freezer. And it was just like; this doesn’t make sense. This doesn’t work.

So over the course of about a year and a half, I had bought three different times, I bought more and more of this farmer’s cow share, and I was selling it off to my friends. Because they were like, “These steaks are amazing, can we get more.” And then it dawned on me one day; maybe this could be something that’s delivered to people’s door, and maybe we could make grass-fed beef accessible. Because everyone I talked to about grass-fed beef was like, “I love the idea of grass-fed beef, but I don’t know how to find grass-fed beef.”

So I then became obsessed with, how do you make that happen? How do you ship nationwide? How do you ship frozen? I ended up meeting a guy who used to work at Omaha Steaks who opened up a bunch of doors. Omaha Steaks doesn’t do grass-fed, but it’s kind of the same thing in terms of how you cut it, and package it, and ship it. And then we were off to the races.

We started with a Kickstarter campaign, because I still wasn’t convinced that there was a real market. So I took $10,000 out of my savings account to buy some meat, and create a video, and push Kickstarter forward. We went out to raise $25,000. Where you’re really doing pre-sales; so you’re selling your product. And I think day one we raised like $40,000. And then by the end of the campaign, which was 30 days, we did $225,000. So it was like; wow. There’s definitely a market here.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Mike Salguero: We definitely struck a nerve. And that was two years ago. So we finished our Kickstarter at the end of September two years ago. And we’ve been growing ever since. It’s been quite a wild ride. It’s been incredibly informative. And really fun to build a company where we’re involved in something that’s so important to so many families. Which is meals and dinner and eating well. It’s just been really awesome to be a part of it.

Juli Bauer: So do you have another job? Or did you have another job when you were starting ButcherBox?

Mike Salguero: No. I had actually just left; before ButcherBox I ran a company called which connected makers of things custom. So jewelry, furniture were two main ones. We were a marketplace that did that. We had raised a bunch of venture capital, and played the whole kind of startup game. So I left that. My cofounder still runs it.

I started ButcherBox as my pastime hobby type thing that I was going to do while pursuing something else. And then it became pretty apparent, pretty fast that, oh this is the thing. This is what I’m going to spend my time on. It was more of a passion play to start with, and I didn’t really believe that it could be a big business. And then it was like; whoa. Every point of validation was, not only could this be a big business, but also we’re solving a real need that people have. Which is trying to eat healthier, trying to put their dollars towards better raised quality meat. And for us to be able to do that was just like; this is it. So since then I’ve focused on just this.

Juli Bauer: So, will you tell people kind of how you go about sourcing your meat? Did you start just wanting to do grass-fed grass-finished beef? And then you were like, maybe we can do chicken and pork. Or was that the goal from the beginning, was to do all three?

Mike Salguero: No, yeah. Totally wasn’t the goal to do all three. We started saying 100% grass-fed grass-finished. And I’ll probably use 100% grass-fed and grass-fed grass-finished. They’re the same; they’re interchangeable. We can get into grass-fed grain-finished in the future. Which is not the same.

So when I started, it was just we’re going to do a monthly box of 100% grass-fed beef. And then we started talking to customers and they’re like; “Yeah, that much beef. I don’t eat that much beef every month. So can we do it every couple of months? Every three months? And by the way, I have a real problem ordering pork.” Or, “I have a real problem ordering chicken. What should I be looking for for these things?”

So it became pretty apparent quickly that we needed to be an all three protein. So we offer pasture raised, heritage breed pork, 100% grass-fed beef, and then organic, free-range chicken. And then we have specials for stuff like lamb, fish, or turkeys for Thanksgiving. Stuff like that.

Juli Bauer: Oh, I didn’t know that.

Mike Salguero: Yep. That will be coming up soon. And what we want to do is essentially make it really easy for you to get this stuff delivered to your house, rather than having to go to a butcher and try to read labels or understand where things are from.

As far as sourcing is concerned; our baseline mission is we only; or our position, rather. We only want to serve our members meat from animals that were raised as nature intended. So what does that mean? That basically means a cow was put on earth to eat grass. Unfortunately, what’s happening in this country is most cows now end up in a feedlot being fed corn. And even within grass-fed, there are people who are playing around with what they’re feeding cows to make them grow better. To make them more consistent. To make them taste more like a corn-fed cow. And that’s not how we roll. We want things that are fed the way that nature intended.

So when we do sourcing, a lot of what we’re looking at is we’re vetting the farms. We’re vetting humane treatment to animals. So we’re working on getting an overall certification for our company. Because all of our products currently are humane certified. So we’re looking for that. We’re definitely looking for never-ever antibiotics and hormones. Meaning, if the cow got sick, it will be given an antibiotic, but it will be taken out of the program. We will never cut a piece of meat that was given an antibiotic, was given hormones.

And then, you know, we’re kind of looking at capacity. We’ve grown very quickly, so we’re making sure that whether it’s a farm or it’s a collective. So a lot of these farmers will sell through a collective, which will kind of represent them and a bunch of other farmers and sell directly to us. It’s a fine balance of finding the right places, doing the right thing, and also making sure that we have a product that tastes great.

Chicken, I think, is a pretty interesting story. When we started, we were doing pasture-raised chickens, and our customers didn’t really like it. So I think a pasture-raised chicken tastes different. The meat is tougher. Breasts are smaller. Legs are tougher. So we do free-range organic. Which is as close as we can get to pastured without being pastured. And we’re still not as far along on our chicken as I’d like to be. I think there’s got to be a pasture raised bird out there that tastes more like a conventional chicken that everyone is used to.

So it’s an ongoing; we have spent the most time and money and effort making sure that we have an amazing product that’s safe to eat. That checks off all the boxes. Because we know that that’s what our customers are looking for, and what’s really important to them.

Juli Bauer: So how many different farms do you work with, and how do you find these farms when you’re trying to find? I’m sure you’re getting new customers on a regular basis. So then you’re constantly trying to find new farms to source this meat from. So how do you find it? And do you go out to these farms to try to find the meat? Or do you have them sent to you so you can taste it and see what it’s like beforehand? How do you balance all of that? I can’t imagine doing all that. That’s insane.

Mike Salguero: {laughs} Yeah, so. The taste testing is the good part. That’s the fun part.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. {laughs}

Mike Salguero: Yeah. So we work with hundreds of farms. And we haven’t gone to see every single farm. And as we’ve grown, what we’ve done; we started with individual farms. And then these farmers were like; “I can’t actually make this supply. But I’m part of the Wisconsin Farmer Association, or farmer co-op. Why don’t you talk to them about purchasing from more people than just me?” So then we would go into a larger co-op and purchase from them. And they’re the ones kind of making sure the farmers meet all their protocols and standards and go out to the farm and make sure things are of proper standards and whatnot.

So, we do buy from a number of individual farms, as well. And frankly a lot of that has been happenstance. Like, somebody introduced me to John Arbuckle, who is Singing Prairie. He makes an amazing pork product. And now he does all of our breakfast sausage. Which is incredible. It tastes amazing. People love it.

We’ve just grown and grown and been able to focus on one product, and he’s been able to grow his business pretty tremendously off of our orders on a monthly basis, because we’re predictable and whatnot.

In other cases, when you’re talking about pork tenderloin, or a beef tenderloin. Like a filet. There’s only; on a pig, there’s only about 4 pounds of pork tenderloin that comes off a pig. So you’re talking about a lot of pigs in order to meet a monthly demand if we were going to put pork tenderloin in a box. So in that case, you’re dealing with a collective that’s able to balance across all of the different farms that they’re working with.

The good thing about collectives, too, is that they have people on staff who go out to these farms on a regular basis. Oftentimes unannounced. It’s much harder for us to be able to do that. It would be hard for us to show up and say, “Hey. Show us those feedbags. Are those actually free of animal byproducts?” So we found it to be more effective and better for us to leverage buyers in collectives that are making sure that we adhere to the protocols that are important to us.

Juli Bauer: Ok. Well I want to get a little bit more into the business. But before; I think this is just an important piece that I probably should have led with. But can you talk about why grass-fed and pasture raised and grass-finished. Grass-fed versus grain-finished. Can you talk about why this is so important, and why people should be eating grass-fed versus the normal meat that you get at the everyday grocery store?

Mike Salguero: Yeah, sure. Very important for people to pay attention here. So basically 98% of the beef consumed in the United States is grass-fed, corn-finished or grain-finished. So every cow starts out exactly the same. 6 months it’s cow-calf. So it’s the mother with its baby. And then about 12 months of weaning off of milk, and just eating grass in a field. And then 98% of the cows go to a feedlot. Some go to a smaller feedlot, but oftentimes these feedlots have hundreds of thousands of animals. And they’re all being fed corn, grains, silage. Basically whatever possible to get them as fat as possible, or to gain as much weight as possible, as quick as possible. Oftentimes they’re given hormones or antibiotics to help speed that along.

It’s incredibly; just from whatever perspective you want to look at. If you want to look at the cow’s perspective. They’re eating something that’s foreign to their body. Oftentimes have issues with stomach issues. Oftentimes get sick from being near other animals. It’s a very stressful environment. It’s not a place where they’re really happy, and eating and doing whatever they want.

Versus grass-fed, or 100% grass-fed. Where after those 18 months of cow-calf and being out on a field, they basically leave them on the field for another year. So the cow is only eating grass. And gets up to its natural weight, at which point it ends up basically at the time that it’s slaughtered, it has never eaten anything other than grass.

So that is better for the environment. There’s lots of stuff about carbon emissions and the fact that if we had more grass, more cows eating grass, it would be much better for the environment. It’s much better for the cow. It’s what they were designed to eat. It is way less stressful. They’re not around a whole bunch of animals. They’re not around their heard. And it’s, in my opinion, a much tastier product.

On the health side, there’s a whole bunch of health benefits to grass-fed beef. Vitamins, fats, minerals, that are way better for the human body rather than grass-fed. So I think lots of people who are following a paleo diet know to avoid grains, or are avoiding eating certain things because it’s inflammatory. Because it doesn’t work well with their digestive system. So it seems; it’s pretty easy for people to grok why it would be important to not eat animals that have a similar experience.

So, grass-fed is becoming more and more popular. Which is great. Our vision for the world is that grass-fed beef is accessible to everybody. We have a lot of work to be able to do that. But the meat industry, these feedlots, kind of the way the system works, it’s all set up to; it’s just really hard for the farmer to choose to raise their cow just on grass. And the system is kind of set up to make that even more difficult. So there’s a lot of changes that need to be made. And we’re hoping to do our part to help move those changes along. And get the customer something that they’re looking for, and find hard to find right now.

Juli Bauer: And can you kind of talk about pork? Because I feel like beef is talked about all the time. Grass-fed, grass-finished. They are like those trigger words. Everybody knows those words if you’re kind of in the paleo community. But I think; even with chicken. People are understanding chicken a little bit more. But I feel like pork is still just unknown. People don’t know what to look for when they’re looking for pork at their grocery store. So can you explain how chickens are usually brought up versus what you’re sourcing?

Mike Salguero: Yeah. So, if you think about a pig. The way that pigs grew up with humans, if you think about a village. Let’s go back to the 1400s. So you have a village. Generally the cows are out, way out in the fields, eating grass. And the pigs are in town eating food scraps. So what’s happened over the past 500 years is that pigs, as they became domesticated and grew closer to humans, have actually; one, their body and their organs are very similar to a humans. They oftentimes dissect pigs in anatomy class. Two, their jaws, like their mouth, looks like a human. And their brain has adapted so that they know whether what they’re eating is poisonous or not, because when somebody threw their trash into a heap 500 years ago, the smart pigs were the ones that didn’t eat the poison. So those have, over time, gotten smarter and smarter and smarter and smarter.

And why that’s important is because the life of a pig is one of the most important in terms of humane treatment and in terms of letting them be a part of; do what they want to do and what their body is designed for, rather than how a traditional pig is raised.

So a traditional pig; and we’re talking a conventional pig. Is in a concentrated feeding operation. So we’re talking about a barn where the pig has very little room. Oftentimes they can’t even turn around. They are in metal crates. And they go; they go crazy. They literally freak out because they’re just confined. That’s not what their body was made for. So there’s tons of stress. It’s just not a very good situation. And then they pump them with antibiotics because pigs actually; because they resemble a human so much, they can get diseases which transfer over. So there’s lots of antibiotics, etc.

So just from the humane treatment side, something like a pasture-raised program. Or at the very least, if you’re listeners are looking to; “Whoa, that’s scary. Let me do something better.” If you look for certified humane or humane treatment; those are good things to, at the very least, look for.

So pigs eat a lot of corn. Even pigs that are raised in pasture. So oftentimes, like our pigs, are out in the pasture. So they’re eating grass. But they’re also eating a tremendous amount of grains and corn. And that’s just what their body is designed for; unlike the cows.

But a pasture-raised pig, which is what ours are, essentially they’re out in a field. Mothers are able to have their piglets out in the field, or in these little huts that are built rather than in these cages. They’re able to be social. Pigs are a very social animal, but in large feeding operations they’re not able to be. And a lot of it has to do with the stress, antibiotics, and in the pasture-raised program you’re not getting any of that stuff.

I really feel like, at least for me. This is my own thing. On the pig side; obviously, I want to avoid antibiotics, so there’s that. But then it’s really, to me, it comes down to the way their brain has adapted and thinking about not eating something that was raised in a way that is not great for the animal.

Being in a meat company, there is the reality that everything has to die. And you want to make sure that they live their life the best way possible. And also that the whole processing of that animal was done in the best way possible. And that’s really important to me, and something that I know is important to our members. So it’s something that we spend a lot of time making sure is up to snuff as well. Does that help?

Juli Bauer: Yeah, that’s so interesting. I’m so excited you talk about that stuff. Because we are just; most of us, just don’t know about that stuff. I don’t know what a feed lot looks like, other than maybe what PETA put out online, that type of stuff.

Mike Salguero: Yep.

Juli Bauer: So it’s just really interesting. Especially, I had no idea about pigs, their being social animals. Anything like that. Most of us would not know that.

Mike Salguero: Yeah, it’s fascinating.

Juli Bauer: That’s super fascinating. So, as you’ve come into this business, and you’ve added chicken, and beef, and pork, and you’ve really grown this business from the start. What are some of the biggest challenges you’ve run into; as a business owner, as an entrepreneur, and how have you dealt with those challenges along the way?

Mike Salguero: That’s a great question. I mean, aside from; so our business. We’ll just take our business for a second. We’ve dealt with a lot of challenges in terms of shipping a frozen box of meat into multiple places across the country. Once it leaves our facility, we can make sure it’s packed as well as we can, but then we’re kind of at the mercy of UPS and FedEx.

Juli Bauer: Big time.

Mike Salguero: And they mess up every once in a while. So it’s, how do we build a member-obsessed organization, where if somebody calls in and complains, and we’re like, “No problem we’ll take care of it.” How do we solve people’s problems, and all that stuff? Which is big, and hairy, and hard. We have a lot of people who have a lot of experience in those areas, because it’s the place where experiences; buying meat and shipping boxes and making sure that that’s done well is critical to having an amazing experience for our members.

So that’s been hard. We had to learn the hard way. You get going; and it’s a few hundred boxes, then it’s a few thousand boxes. And it’s like; oh geeze, we’ve got to make changes and figure out what’s working here.

As far as the business itself goes, I think the hardest part has been just; I’ve learned. I didn’t know anything about pigs before I got into this. I literally knew; I ate bacon, thought it tasted good. Probably had only had a pork chop, and that was it. It’s like, making sure that we’re doing is what’s best for our customer while also learning on the fly has been interesting and challenging. Especially for me. I mean, I love it. I love that I get to learn so much about meat. Which is so important. But I sometimes have trouble with; what’s the right call to make here, because we want to do what’s best for everyone involved.

As far as the company goes, I think the hardest part is, a company, when you’re small, it’s very much about; I have this analogy of, when you start a company it’s like hacking through the jungle with machetes. And basically, you just find people who can hack a machete all day long. You’re like; “Here’s a machete, go hack!” And eventually, you get to a dirt road. And you’re like; “Do any of you guys know how to drive a car?”

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Mike Salguero: Because your machete swinging skills are great, but I don’t know if I trust you behind a car. And that’s the big change that happens in companies. Trying to train your staff, and trying to get people up the curve so they can make the leap from small company into larger company. And that’s really hard to do. And something I think we’ve done pretty well this time around, versus my last company where I think I didn’t do that well. I didn’t really recognize that that was going to be an issue until it was.

Juli Bauer: How many people work for you at this point? Work for ButcherBox; other than, obviously, all of your small farms that you’re sourcing from.

Mike Salguero: We don’t have the farmers, the cutters. So after the animal is processed, it goes to a cutter who cuts it into a 10-ounce pork chop, or whatever. A 6-ounce filet. And then they freeze it, and then those get shipped to distribution facilities. None of that; we don’t have staff for any of that.

Outside of that, we have 50 fulltime people working for us right now.

Juli Bauer: And are you planning to grow bigger than that, or do you feel comfortable where it’s at right now?

Mike Salguero: We have a couple of positions that are open in email marketing and analytics. But we feel pretty good. The place where we’ve grown a lot is customer service. So actually, of the 50, I think it’s like 18 are customer service. And mainly because we’re trying to overinvest in making sure every customer has an amazing experience. So I don’t know how big that will be. I imagine we’ll get efficiencies at some point. But at this point it doesn’t matter. What we want is to be a resource. So if you have any question on how to cook it. If you have any question about your order. I want responses immediately, and I want people to feel like they get the level of service that they would require from a company like ours.

Juli Bauer: I think customer service is so important. Because just based on me working with different customer service, I completely go back to that company or that brand over and over based on the customer service.

Mike Salguero: Totally.

Juli Bauer: I think if anything a business can do, if their customer service is awesome then you’re going to keep going back. Even if they mess up in something, you’ll want to work with them continuously.

Mike Salguero: Yeah. There’s this whole thing. And this is a part where I’m obsessed with now. We’re not at a size and we’re able to really tackle it. But the experience of your customer is the most important thing. What does it feel like when they receive their box? What does opening it feel like? When they call, how fast does someone get on the phone? How friendly are they? It’s all about that experience.

Even if a box arrives late, but it’s still cold and it’s still good to go. People are willing to forgive a lot if they have a great experience. But it’s all about making sure that that experience is as perfect as possible. And I think there are a lot of online companies that do a really good job of that. Zappos is the one everyone talks about. So fortunately, we have some good models to look at. But it’s certainly something we just want to make sure that we build out an amazing, incredible experience for our customers.

Juli Bauer: Will you walk people kind of through the process of getting their first ButcherBox. Where do you ship to? What kind of different box options do you have? Can you personalize? Just kind of walk people through the process of getting their first ButcherBox.

Mike Salguero: Yeah. So right now we ship to the lower 48 states. So any state, any address we’ll ship to. So we have now five options. You can buy a monthly box or every other month, depending on how much meat you eat. And you can do all beef; beef, chicken, pork, which is our most popular; beef, chicken; beef, pork. And we’ve just launched a custom box where you essentially can go in and choose 6 different cuts of pretty much anything you want. So some people are like, “I only want chicken.” And just get chicken breast, and do that. Or some other people have mix and match.

We actually launched the custom box; when we started, we were just curated. So if you’re in the beef, chicken, pork box, we send you what we think you’ll like. Which works really great for some people. We include recipes inside. Some people love that. They love the experience of opening and not knowing what’s going to be inside. But we found a lot of our customers didn’t like that.

And we also found, which is interesting, is a lot of it came down to access. So if you live in a rural community and you can’t find this product otherwise, that seemed to be the person who most wanted to choose 2 pounds of ground beef, because they want to make sure they can cook those burgers this weekend. Or choose the tenderloin. Or choose whatever they were choosing. So we launched a custom option to help those people have the experience that they want to have with us.

So those are the options. And then you can do add-ons, as well. So what we try to do with add-ons is basically pass on really great deals to our members. So once you’ve purchases, you can always add stuff to your box. Whether that’s bacon, or that’s more ground beef, or more pork chops. I think we have 25 different add-ons that you can put in your box. And those can come on a monthly basis afterwards.

Juli Bauer: That’s awesome.

Mike Salguero: So that’s pretty much it. And we try to take a lot of the guesswork out of it. We try to make it as easy as possible to just click on the button and get started.

Juli Bauer: So you said you’re going to have; I don’t know if you’ve done this in the past, since I haven’t worked with you for more than 6 to 8 months. But have you done shipments in the past where you did turkeys, like around Thanksgiving?

Mike Salguero: Oh yeah.

Juli Bauer: Or fish.

Mike Salguero: Yep.

Juli Bauer: So how often do you add those other items in, and what are they?

Mike Salguero: So we’re definitely gearing up for the holidays because that’s the time where people are really looking for the large roasts, or they’re looking for the turkeys. So we’re going to do a big turkey push. We’ll probably do duck. We’re going to do lamb. We’re going to do some large beef roasts, like a rib roast.

Juli Bauer: Oh, cool.

Mike Salguero: I think we’ll probably do a rib roast. So those, for our members, will be offered at a really great price. Like, better than you can get in the store. And you’ll know that it’s the same quality that you’ve known and loved from ButcherBox. We have done turkeys twice now; two years in a row we’ve done turkeys. Supermarkets never make money on turkeys. They’re always like, it’s a loyalty thing. And it’s the same for us. We’re not looking to make a lot of money on turkeys. We’re just looking to continue to be your butcher. So if everyone is like, “I need a turkey for Thanksgiving.” Then they can say, “I got it from ButcherBox.” That’s better for us. We want to just continue being the leader source for meat.

We’ll be launching; I think in a week or two, we’ll be launching our holiday menu and plan. Make sure the people know well in advance where they can get great quality stuff.

Juli Bauer: Do you guys have a newsletter, or do you send out emails, or do you just have this on your website whenever any of these specialty products come in?

Mike Salguero: Yeah, we do. You can go to our home page and just enter in your email, and get newsletters and offers and specials and stuff like that. We’ll definitely be broadcasting that pretty wide. Maybe we can do something with you. But certainly we’ll make it known that what we’re doing and the types of products that we’re going to be offering.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Because I had one of those questions. I think I had maybe one or two. And someone was asking if you were going to add fish to kind of the normal. Would you ever do that? Expanding into wild caught salmon or any of those options?

Mike Salguero: Yes. So we are looking into salmon for sure. I think we’ll probably start with just salmon. We might do one other fish. But we have a lot of people who are asking for fish. And it’s certainly something that we want to offer. We haven’t found a product that we’re super thrilled with yet. So that’s been the biggest hold up. But certainly it’s coming.

Juli Bauer: Do you guys hope to ship outside of the US? Do you ever hope to ship to Canada? Is that kind of a goal, like farther places? Or is it good to stay in the US because shipping, I’m sure, is just a freaking nightmare.

Mike Salguero: {laughs} Shipping is a freaking nightmare.

Juli Bauer: Seriously, I can’t imagine dealing with shipping. And then everyone blames it on you, when you’re like, “I shipped it out the same time I do every time.” I can’t imagine. That would be such a pain in the ass.

Mike Salguero: I’ve been told the only thing that’s more of a pain in the ass than shipping is getting meat over the border, in Canada.

Juli Bauer: Interesting.

Mike Salguero: So we want to do it. Actually, our head of logistics and operations is Canadian. So we’ve been like, “When are we going to Canada?” it’s been tough to prioritize that when we have all these other burning fires in terms of a growing company and all the things that we want to do. So it’s like; do we offer salmon, or do we crack Canada?

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Mike Salguero: I do think Canada; it would be great for us to do it in ’18. I think that would be awesome. We actually have a huge list of Canadian people who are like, “Please tell me when you can provide this in Canada.” And the list is growing. It’s certainly something that we know is needed. We just need to figure out how to actually make that happen.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Well, I did a podcast about paleo on a budget, and how I did paleo when I was making $17,000 a year. And my main focus wasn’t meat quality, because I also didn’t understand the importance of meat quality. Because this was 7 years ago, and I was straight out of college, and shopping at super sketchy places anyway.

Mike Salguero: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: But, do you think ButcherBox is budget friendly when you’re comparing to maybe local grocery stores or big chain stores like a Costco. Do you think it’s a budget friendly piece that someone can add into their monthly budget, really?

Mike Salguero: I do. I’ll answer that question two ways. I do think it’s budget friendly. One of the benefits of the way we ship our stuff is it’s portioned, and it’s frozen. So if you want to take out one pork chop, you can take out one pork chop. What tends to happen in a store; in a Costco or something like that. You buy something, and it’s like 4 or 5 pounds, and then you might waste some of that. Some of that might go bad. So there’s definitely that. That’s one piece.

The second piece is if you are eating grass-fed beef and organic chicken and pasture-raised pork, and you’re already spending that money, we tend to come in below the cost of retail, and it’s delivered directly to your house. So that’s kind of a no-brainer if that’s the way that you’re eating already.

Juli Bauer: Gotcha.

Mike Salguero: If you’re not, we’re definitely more expensive than convention. Than purchasing conventional. And if people don’t feel like they can move from conventional to something better, what I would tell people. Or what we do tell people, is animals store toxins in their fat. So if you’re going to have that grain-fed, or that antibiotic piece of meat from a sketchy place, as you said. Go for lean cuts. And that’s the best way you can stay paleo and do as well as you can on the tightest budget that you have.

So what that means is if you’re going to ground beef, do the 93/7. And if you’re going to buy something, get a sirloin or get a tenderloin. Get something that’s very lean, not a lot of fat. Because that will help limit the amount of toxins that you could be ingesting into your body. That’s if you’re like, “No way, ButcherBox not accessible.”

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Mike Salguero: That’s what I would tell people.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, I think that’s great. When I was getting crappy sources of meat, I was always trimming off the extra fat on any of the meat that I was using.

Mike Salguero: Yep.

Juli Bauer: ` Just making sure I got rid of that. So, do you get ButcherBox sent to your house every month?

Mike Salguero: Oh yeah. Absolutely. We have to do the double box. I didn’t mention that, but you can get twice as much meat.

Juli Bauer: Oh cool. I didn’t know that.

Mike Salguero: Yeah. I have a wife and a 3-year-old daughter and twin 1-year-olds.

Juli Bauer: OH my gosh! How is that going Mike? Do you want to talk about that here?

Mike Salguero: Sure.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Mike Salguero: I’d be glad to.

Juli Bauer: My friend has a 3-year-old and twins, and man. Her life is tough right now. She loves the sh*t out of them, but it is absolute mayhem going to their house.

Mike Salguero: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: There is so much vomit and poop everywhere.

Mike Salguero: Oh. Yeah. There’s not that much vomit anymore.

Juli Bauer: Ok that’s good.

Mike Salguero: {laughs} That’s good.

Juli Bauer: I got threw up on last time. She threw up right on my shoe. Right on my boob, and right on my shoe. I’m like, come on. I held you for 14 seconds.

Mike Salguero: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: So you’re past the throw up stage.

Mike Salguero: We’re past the throw up stage for sure. Those twins threw up for the first 6 months.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Mike Salguero: Yeah, no it’s great. All girls, too. Which I’m thrilled about. I was really scared of having a son.

Juli Bauer: Really?

Mike Salguero: Yeah. Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Oh my gosh. Did you have sisters?

Mike Salguero: I had one sister and two brothers, and no father. So I had a little bit of head trash about being a dad to a son. But also, I just. I don’t know. I was really close with my sister. We’re the closest in age, so I used to play girl talk and put on makeup and get my nails painted.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Mike Salguero: And like, I know I can do that well. So I look forward to when my girls are old enough for that stuff.

Juli Bauer: So kind of talk about; are you a good cook? Do you do the cooking in the family? Kind of talk about that.

Mike Salguero: Yeah sure. So I do a lot of the cooking. My wife works half time. And this job has definitely given me the opportunity to basically make my schedule however I want to. So I’m typically leaving at 4:45, going to CrossFit, and then coming home, cooking dinner. I would say; my wife is a much better cook if its following a recipe. I’m a much better cook if it’s like, open the fridge and just make something happen. So if it’s the weekend, and we have time, and there’s a recipe to follow it would definitely be my wife. But I love putting on music and just cooking. My whole thing with cooking is I like as few ingredients as possible.

So my wife is gluten and dairy free. My kids aren’t, but we limit the gluten and dairy. And we’re probably serving ButcherBox four times a week. I don’t know; my favorite cut is short rib. That’s my favorite recipe. I love short ribs.

Juli Bauer: Ooh. Yeah. I love that thinly sliced beef.

Mike Salguero: Oh, yeah, yeah.

Juli Bauer: It’s like paper thin. It is so, so good. It would be so good in like a Philly cheesesteak. Even though I’ve never even had a Philly cheesesteak, I’ve just visualized them many times in my life. But I feel like it would be so good in a Philly cheesesteak. You could so some gluten-free bread. But it is so, so good.

Mike Salguero: How would you do the cheese? Would you do the cheese with like goat cheese?

Juli Bauer: No.

Mike Salguero: Or nutritional yeast?

Juli Bauer: No, god no. I would say f*ck it and I would do the real deal cheese. Real deal. All the way.

Mike Salguero: You’d have to do like Cheez Whiz.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} No. {laughing} Oh man. So I’ve never tried the breakfast sausage; is that something you’ve added recently? Or have you had that for a while?

Mike Salguero: We’ve had that for a while, yeah. It’s an add-on all the time. It’s awesome. It’s just sage and salt. It’s really, really good.

Juli Bauer: Yum! I need to add that. I just added some filet mignon, because I don’t think I’ve tried your filet mignon yet. And then some; I love the hamburgers that you guys have. Just the individualized hamburgers. Just to make it easier. I know making your own hamburger patty is just as easy. But it’s so nice to just be able to throw salt on, put it on the grill pan or whatever, and have a burger instantly.

Mike Salguero: Yep. They’re great. I think they’re way better on a griddle pan rather than a grill, anyway.

Juli Bauer: They’re so, so good.

Mike Salguero: Yeah. I agree. That’s one of the really cool things, I think, about it. It’s nice to be an avid user of the product of your company. But one of the things I love about it, it’s just so convenient. Even if you forgot to take something out of the freezer, you can soak it in some water for like 10, 15 minutes. It will thaw right out, and then just cook it. It makes dinner so much easier.

Juli Bauer: It seriously does. I just keep pulling things out of the freezer when I’m like, “OH, I forgot to get anything at the store.” I just pull that out of the freezer. I always have something on hand. Which is really awesome. I just pulled some chicken out to put in a crockpot tonight. So we’ll have shredded chicken tacos for dinner. Since we’re both working late.

Mike Salguero: Oh, nice.

Juli Bauer: It’s so easy! So one of the main things that I’ve noticed when I’ve talked about ButcherBox and people have contacted me about it. I’ve seen this myself, but I’ve also run into this issue with meat that I’ve bought at the store, as well. People will say that there was, say a cut in the packaging so it leaked.

Mike Salguero: Leakers!

Juli Bauer: Yes. And I always, no matter where I buy my meat, I always put it on a plate in my fridge. And someone will be like, “It leaked all over!” I’m like, “Have you never had meat before? That’s what it does.” It thaws out, and then juices go everywhere. So I always have it on a plate. So what have you done to deal with these issues of any tears that have happened in the packaging, or if something spoils. What do you recommend people do who are using ButcherBox and have run into any of these issues? And moving forward so they’re not like, “Oh, f*ck this, I don’t want to work with this company.” What do you recommend them do to move forward and to deal with any sort of issue they’ve run into?

Mike Salguero: Yeah, first and foremost, you should definitely. Like you said. Thaw things in a bowl or a plate. And that’s not just us; that’s pretty much any meat that you purchase.

Juli Bauer: Ever. Yes.

Mike Salguero: That’s fairly easy. Or a frisbee. Turn a frisbee upside down.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Mike Salguero: Yeah, I mean, that’s just kind of standard. But, that doesn’t negate the issue that we have. A leaker is from a hole in the packaging of the meat. And that hold can happen for a whole host of reasons. I mean, we’ve gone through a tremendous amount of science on this, and process improvement and whatnot. We are making it better. But it’s still not nearly as good as I want it to be.

So some of the issues that we have; one, we’re shipping things. So now you have plastic on top of plastic in terms of the packaging. And if that jostles, or if a corner goes into the other one, it can create a tear or a hole. Which then unfortunately sucks.

It also can happen if things are too close to the dry ice; it can actually get too cold. So there’s something called a microfracture, which is caused by it being too cold in there. Which is totally safe for the meat, but not good for the plastic packaging.

And we’ve seen crazy stuff, like meat that literally shattered and a whole bunch of weird stuff. Our policy is, if you are not happy with the product, just write to us at support and we will make it better. So whether that’s put it in your next box, or give you a refund for that item; no problem. We want people to be thrilled with the product.

One misconception that people tend to have is that it’s somehow not safe because of the hole. That’s not true. The meat maintains its safety. It’s just a pain in the butt to clean out your refrigerator again. Which goes back to step one; which is thaw in something. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Mike Salguero: Because that’s the easiest way to make sure it doesn’t leak everywhere, is to thaw it in something.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. And I’ve had one or two packages that had a little cut from rubbing up, whatever happened to it. And when I defrost them, I always defrost them on a plate. And I’ve cooked all those items, and never had any sort of issues. I mean, unless you’re leaving your meat out for a week straight, which no matter what you should not be eating it, cut or not, in the packaging. But I’ve never run into any sort of issues, even if the packaging was a little bit weird. So I’m just saying that.

Mike Salguero: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Feedback with that. I’m sure that’s the hardest thing to kind of deal with that you’ve run into what that customer service.

Mike Salguero: Totally. And actually the hardest thing is when UPS just doesn’t show up. Or FedEx. And somebody is like; “I was expecting this this weekend.” And then they do deliver it the next week and it’s a stinky box of meat. That’s the worst. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah, that’s super frustrating.

Mike Salguero: Which, unfortunately, it happens. And like you said; it’s not really our fault, but it is our fault. So it’s just something we have to own.

Juli Bauer: Deal with. Yeah.

Mike Salguero: But we are making improvements. Our percentage of leakers has gone down quite a bit. But it continues to be one of those areas that, going back to building an amazing, remarkable customer experience. We need to exceed people’s expectations on that.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Continually improving. So, do you guys have any big projects you’re working on for the future, other than obviously trying to improve your business, improve customer service. Whatever else. Are there any big projects you guys kind of have lined up? Or you’re hoping to do?

Mike Salguero: We do. We have a couple of really big ones coming up. So we’re actually opening our first retail store.

Juli Bauer: Oh! That’s awesome.

Mike Salguero: Yeah. So, we won’t sell meat. It will be more like a brand experience. But that will be in Harvard Square in Cambridge, which we’re pretty excited about. And we’re also opening a test kitchen where we are building out basically a studio with a kitchen. And we’re just going to shoot videos on how to cook stuff. Bring in people. Maybe we can convince you to come to do a demonstration. Here’s how I cook this, or create recipes. Because we know that our customer; one of the things we really want to embrace is helping people feel empowered to cook the food that they receive.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Mike Salguero: So the more we can empower you to be like, “Oh, I know how to make this.” The better that is. So we want to do that via video, which is going to be pretty cool. And the third one is that we are trying to get a B-corp certification. Which, I don’t know if you know what that means.

Juli Bauer: I don’t.

Mike Salguero: Essentially it’s a certification where they look at environmental impact, impact on workers, impact on social issues. It’s kind of a stamp of approval; like you’d get an organic stamp, but it’s for the company and how the company interacts with its employees and with its customers, and with the world. We’ve been working on that for a while, and it looks like we’re pretty close to actually being able to get that.

Juli Bauer: Very cool.

Mike Salguero: That will be special.

Juli Bauer: That’s awesome. Congratulations. That’s so cool that you’re opening a little store front. That’s sweet.

Mike Salguero: Yeah. We’re going to put a big cow in the window. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Nice.

Mike Salguero: We’re on the search for a cow.

Juli Bauer: Ok. {laughing} So, I know in every ButcherBox you put recipes in there. And a reader asked if you guys were going to add in more recipes, for especially cuts of meats that aren’t the common ground beef or pork chops. If you’re planning to add more recipes to that. And are there any recipes on your blog at this point, or on your website, that people can find ways to cook meats that they’re like, “I have no idea what to do with this.”

Mike Salguero: Yes. We launched an early version of our recipes, which is It’s also in the header. And what we’ve found. We’ve done a bunch of interviewing of customers, and we’ve found that people actually don’t use our recipes {laughs}. They look at our recipes to know how not to mess it up. But they don’t actually read the recipe and follow the recipe.

So what we want to do is actually build out more; lean more towards online. Drive people to the website. So if you get a tri-tip roast, and you’re like, “I don’t know what to do with this.” You can go to our tri-tip page, and see some recipes that we’ve created. See some recipes that other people have created. We have links to other websites. And just try to empower the person with as much recipe knowledge as possible.

We also, on that page, will give really quick cooking instructions. Which is what we’ve found most people actually want. Which is like, “Put a grill on medium high and cook for 8 minutes on one side, and flip it over.” That’s kind of what we’ve found most people are looking for with a cut they don’t know what to do with, rather than use this rub and do this, and do this. So we’re in the process of really rethinking the way that we send recipes to people. Try to make it a better program. But the majority of it is going to be online stuff rather than off-line.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Well I love getting the random pieces of meat, because that’s what I like to do is figure out different ways. But I think people should know they can always turn to Pinterest. Pinterest will give you all the details, if you’re like, “I have a top sirloin steak. I don’t know if this is supposed to be slowly cooked or just a quick sear.” Just go to Pinterest. And there will be new ways to find different recipes all the time.

But I’m on that page right now; on your ButcherBox/recipes, and you can find that on the website. And I love that, you just say. Here is a pork butt, and here are the different ways you can braise it, you can roast it, and just gives you overall cooking instructions. I think that’s really cool.

Mike Salguero: And then if you scroll down, you’ll see a bunch of links to other people’s recipes.

Juli Bauer: Yeah! That’s awesome.

Mike Salguero: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: I love that. Those look really pretty, too. The website is seriously beautiful. You guys have done such a great job with website stuff.

Mike Salguero: Thank you.

Juli Bauer: It’s managed really well. Well thank you so much for being on! Everybody, you can check out I will have a little discount for you, as well. And then you can always go to my website, If you just search ButcherBox, I have a post all about it. And kind of different recipes I’ve used with ButcherBox.

Is there anything you want to tell anybody before we leave, Mike?

Mike Salguero: No. So first of all, I was saying before we got on this that it’s such an honor to talk to you. I’ve literally followed your blog for years and years; my wife and I. You were the introduction to paleo for us. So huge honor to actually get to be able to talk to you.

Juli Bauer: Oh! Well we can thank Torrie, because she is the best, and I love working with her. With you. She’s been so amazing on your team.

Mike Salguero: That’s good. I’ll definitely pass that along to her.

Juli Bauer: Alright. Well thank you so much for being on. Remember guys, you can check out ButcherBox and see all of their different cuts that they have, and different offerings, and see any of the specials they have coming up. And then get the special offer with PaleOMG. I will talk to you guys soon. Thank you, again Mike for being on. Just stay on the line as I end this. And I’ll talk to you guys later. Bye-bye for now.

So excited to chat with the owner and creator of ButcherBox! I have been receiving ButcherBox since March and have absolutely loved it. I constantly have meat in my freezer and everything always tastes amazing. Hope you guys enjoy his story! So excited to chat with the owner and creator of ButcherBox! I have been receiving ButcherBox since March and have absolutely loved it. I constantly have meat in my freezer and everything always tastes amazing. Hope you guys enjoy his story! ____________ Big […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 58:50
Car Accidents, Colonics & Lake Powell – Episode 51: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 23 Sep 2017 12:45:18 +0000 13 Today on the podcast, I’m talking about all kinds of random ish. A guy riding his bike down the highway (drugs obviously involved), getting a colonic (aka a professional enema) and going to Lake Powell for the 4th time and […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking about all kinds of random ish. A guy riding his bike down the highway (drugs obviously involved), getting a colonic (aka a professional enema) and going to Lake Powell for the 4th time and what I will do differently there in the future!

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Episode 51 Transcription!

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

1. Colonics [10:55]
2. Lake Powell update [24:58]
3. Weekly blog recap [48:32]

Juli Bauer: Well hello. Welcome to, I don’t know, what are we at? 51st episode? Why don’t I ever look this up before? Because I’m the worst. Apologies. Let’s start apologizing for things. I apologize for not having a podcast up last week. Let’s review why.

So, I usually record my podcast Thursday or Friday. Which, it’s Thursday right now while I’m recording this. So, last week, I needed to record it early. But I left town at like 6 a.m. on Wednesday. So I was like; ok, what the hell am I going to talk about? Another recorded podcast by myself. By me amigo; my friend, myself. And so I recorded the podcast while I was doing stuff. While I was running errands. I got 30 minutes’ worth of content, but what I wanted to talk about and what was recorded on that podcast, and what I’m talking about today, I couldn’t get the full effect and the full recap, if you will, with just that 30 minutes that I had that Tuesday recording the podcast before I left for Lake Powell on Wednesday.

So after I recorded it, I was like, I don’t even want to f*cking post this. I’m driving most of the time, trying not to get hit by cars. So I wasn’t feeling it. And I didn’t want to put out completely bullsh*t content for you. I mean, if you’re listening to this podcast, you’re used to bullsh*t content. But I felt bad. It just wasn’t the full recap. So I thought it would be better to do it once I got back from Lake Powell. And could really give you the full vision of my experience. But we’ll get to that in a second.

I first want to talk about something I witnessed, and I talked about last week while I recorded the podcast while I was driving. Because it was just perfect for what I had experienced. The last podcast I recorded, I had just recorded it, and then I went on a little double date. So my husband got home, and we hop in the car. And then we get onto I-25, which is like the main highway of Denver. We get on I-25, and we’re coming on the on-ramp, and people are going kind of slow. And then a car kind of pulls just to the side so you can have a little bit of vision almost. And there’s a bicyclist on the road. I’m like what the f*ck.

But, I’ve seen weirder sh*t in Denver. So I didn’t think much of it. I’m like, ok he obviously just accidentally got on the highway. I’m not sure how you do that. But he’ll stay in the little, what’s it called. The side of the highway that you can pull over when you have an accident or a police officer pulls you over, like a real dick, when you’re speeding like a normal human being.

So, I think he’s going to pull over, and so we’re all kind of trying to get over to the left. But then this guy decides that he wants to go to the fast lane, so he shoots off to the left, causing the cars not only in front of me, but the left of me, and then to the right of me, all to get into accidents. So he caused four accidents in front of me. Luckily, I was not one of those people in the accidents. Because I was far enough behind that I could stop in time. Take it in. But I’m just screaming. I’m driving. My husband is in the passenger’s seat. Because my husband’s travel time from work should be 20 minutes, and it takes an hour most of the time. So I almost always drive somewhere when he gets home. Because he’s been sitting in traffic all day.

So I’m driving. I’m screaming, because all these accidents keep happening, like little pop cans smashing. Like a woman in a little; what are those electric cars? Why can’t my brain function today? This little electric car. Tiny little thing. She gets hit by a truck. And so all these accidents happen. And the bicyclist does a little U-turn, and then he’s biking towards me, and so we make eye contact. And I’m like, wow. You’re f*cking on drugs, out of your mind. Who are these people on meth and heroin? What the f*ck?

In Denver, it’s such a huge issue. We have the Cherry Creek Trail where a lot of people commute on their bikes to work, or you can get a great workout in because it goes for miles. I think like 60 miles or something. And they have needle drop stations on the Cherry Creek Trail. That’s how much these people are shooting up. F*ck! It’s so gross.

So this guy is obviously hopped up on something. Maybe it was bath salts. Who knows. I don’t know, that’s just me being skeptical. Jumping to conclusions. But he was f*cked up for sure. So he’s biking towards me. And then he does another U-turn, going back down the highway. And these people who are on the highway in the left lanes, they don’t know what’s going on. They just think it’s like a normal accident. That we’ve just all rear-ended each other. Because now he’s going down. I’m like, do I keep going? Do I pull over with these people and make sure everybody is ok?

And we didn’t want to get in a car accident, so we just pulled over. Made sure this old woman in her tiny car that had been rear-ended by a truck was ok. I started crying. I was like, “Are you ok?!” Because it’s so scary. This poor old woman and her drink got spilled all over her car. That car was totaled for sure. But poor thing. She was probably drinking a delicious coffee, an afternoon delight, kind of. And it got spilled everywhere because this jackass got on the f*cking highway on his bike!

So then the person who hit the little car, the truck. The truck is obviously fine. The truck kind of keeps going down. Tries to pull off to the side a little farther up, and then the woman who was in that truck gets out of the truck, runs onto the highway, and is trying to stop this bicyclist. And the bicyclist is like, “F*ck you man.” And tries to go even farther out into the highway. So all these cars are screeching to a stop, and he just keeps f*cking going down the highway. Just going on down. Like a real idiot.

So I have no idea what happened to him. The fire trucks came, and we just told them what happened. And then we were like, ok we need to get the f*ck out of the way. So we just told them what happened and then we left, and just left our number if they needed witnesses or whatever. But we could see, on the next on-ramp, there were flashing lights. Like an ambulance and a police car. So we don’t know if that had to do with it. But I don’t know what happened to this guy. And I really want to know.

And then a girl on Instagram sent me a picture, and she was like, “Was this your guy on I-25?” But it was a total different bike and outfit. So I was like, no. But it was almost the same area. Who are these people?

Another thing that’s happening in Colorado; Colorado Springs, to be exact. Hence why I don’t go to Colorado Springs very often. No offense to people in Colorado Springs. That was rude. So, this woman, it looks like she’s; you know the runner’s outfits that those long-distance runners wear. Like those people who are in the Olympics, and they’re running forever. They have those almost onesies; kind of like what wrestler’s wear. You know what I’m talking about? I don’t know what they’re called.

So this woman in Colorado Springs; a woman must be out for long runs. And instead of going to the park bathroom or a gas station or a porta-potty. There are many options. I’ve hit up many options in my day. Because I have a very small bladder. But this woman decides that she’s not going to do that. And she is taking dumps in people’s; {barking} Jackson. Jackson. Hold your phone, it was the ice machine.

So this woman is taking dumps in people’s yards in front of children. Just let that sink in for a second. Could you imagine if your kids are playing in the front yard. You’re like, you know, doing some housework stuff. Maybe getting some work done. Maybe doing the dishes. A little vacuuming. And your kid comes in and they’re like, “Hey mom, a woman is taking a poop in our front yard.” How would you deal with that?

So what does she do? She goes out and she’s like, “Are you serious? Are you seriously pooping in my yard?” The woman is like, “Sorry!” Takes the napkins that she brings with her, wipes her butt, and leaves the sh*t in the yard, and keeps on running. {barks} Jackson! Stop barking, bro. You’re not cute in this episode. It’s not cute.

And she’s done this more than once. This is not a one-time deal. This is not a situation where she just had to let things go. And the thing is, that woman lives across the street from a park where there’s a public bathroom. I hate this woman so much. I can’t believe she defecated in someone’s yard in front of children. I don’t even like children. And I’m not going to take a poop in front of them.

1. Colonics [10:55]

This is actually the perfect leeway. I didn’t mean to do this, but this is the perfect introduction into my next topic. Because, this is what I kind of recorded last week. But then it’s just shitting recording. No pun intended. Sorry, I have to stay hydrated.

So, ok. Let’s do a little backstory. Ever since I went to Idaho; I went on a short trip to Idaho, the people who put together my trip, they put me at this one restaurant that had no gluten-free items. And I thought I made a good decision with the salad I purchased. I got a salmon salad. It had beets, and I stayed away from the dressing. Like, really a simple salad. Nothing crazy. Good chunk of goat cheese. Things I don’t have issues with. And as soon as I ate that meal, my stomach felt super off. And it had not been back to normal ever since then.

Just so you know, while you’re listening to this podcast, if you’re eating, you just shouldn’t. {laughs} Ok? I’m not that gross of a person, but not everybody can take this topic. We’re talking about poop here, guys. I’m sorry that’s so gross. Don’t hate me. Just stop eating for a second.

So anyway, my digestion had been really off. And I’m a person who does not have those issues because I stay away from food that makes me sick. I drink a sh*t ton of water. I try to be good about eating slow and chewing my food enough. So I’m really regular. I don’t have stomach issues. I don’t have gas issues, because I stay away from those foods that make me feel that way.

And if you’re a person who has gas issues or stomach issues, you need to find out what food is causing this. Because you don’t have to live like that. Just FYI. I think a lot of people think that; they’re like, “Oh, I’m just a gassy person.” No, the food you’re eating is make you a gassy ass person. {laughs} Gassy ass.

So, ok. It had been 2 weeks of not feeling good, and I had been eating all my own food. Drinking a ton of water. Staying away from sugar and alcohol. So I should have been feeling back to normal, because I had been to places where I had gluten in my diet accidentally, and I was able to get back on track within that next week. But this had been like 2 weeks, and I’m like, “I do not feel ok.”

So I was in getting my eyebrows tinted and waxed, and my girl who does that is f*cking hilarious. And she’s so easy to talk to and I love seeing her. Which is probably why I go see her every three weeks to get tinted and waxed. And because my eyebrows are blonde, so you’ve got to dye these motherf*ckers.

So I go in, and I’m talking to her, and I don’t know how it comes up. But I was talking about how my digestive tract had been weird. She was like, “Oh my god, you need to go in and get a colonic!” And I was like, I don’t even know what that means. I’ve heard of enemas before, at home enemas. Don’t want to do that kind of sh*t at home. I have so many puns in here! I had never heard of a colonic. Places you can go to.

So I start doing some research about the place. Because there’s a naturopath place in town called Natural Flow. And I know people are going to be like, “Was this sponsored…” Whenever something is sponsored, I say and let you know. But no, this was not sponsored. My bum was not sponsored in this recording of this podcast, ok? But it’s called Natural Flow. {laughs} Which is so great. And it’s in the uptown area in Denver. But I’m sure there are many all over the place in the US. And outside of the US.

But it’s colon hydrotherapy. So she starts telling me about. And she’s like, “Oh my god, Juli, you have to go do it. It’s so awesome. I highly recommend it. You feel so good afterwards.” So I was like, that same day, I call in and make an appointment. I did it right before; the day before we left for Lake Powell. Because I didn’t want to feel like sh*t at Lake Powell. I felt super bloated, wasn’t regular. Just not myself. Not my normal, healthy self.

So I make an appointment. I go in the day before Lake Powell. And it’s like, in this little Victorian house in uptown. And you know what I’m talking about if you live in Denver, and you know the uptown area. Ok, it’s super weird. It’s super awkward, because bowel movements are done in privacy. And this is with someone else around, kind of.

Ok. So it’s pretty much like an enema. And this is going to get a little detailed, but I think it’s important for people to know. And after experiencing it myself, I can’t wait to do it again and I would recommend it to anyone. So I’m just putting it all out there because that’s what I’ve done on my podcast. I mean my blog for 7 years at this point. I talked about my Brazilian wax on my blog in detail. So we’re going the colon route now.

Ok, so you go in. You pick your music you want to listen to. I was like, I don’t know any of this music. Because it’s very crunchy, hippie music. So I pick something, and she’s like, “Oh, that’s so joyful!” It was like Irish Folk music. I was like, ok. {laughs} So she puts this music in. And then she explains everything. How you’re going to do it. Because you get everything done pretty much yourself, and she just makes sure everything’s going to plan.

So you have to kind of picture this. Imagine you’re at the doctor. They have those kind of lie down beds. And then it has these little foot spots, where you put your feet up just a little bit. So if you put your feet up, you can kind of scoot your butt down. And if you scoot your bum down, there’s this little tube. Don’t worry, she takes it out of the package. You see it’s a brand new tube. Puts it onto this little water spout. Think of a bidet. That’s what it’s called, right? I haven’t used one of those. I don’t have a fancy toilet at home. I just got a regular flushing toilet, no bidet.

So imagine a bidet; that water kind of coming out. It’s that same thing here. And it has this long tube. It’s a very small tube; nothing crazy. And you scoot your bum down. And you put this tube in your bum. I know you hate me right now. I know. I get it. This is so gross. And it’s so weird to talk about. Luckily, I’m in my house by myself, and don’t feel like anybody actually listens to this podcast. So it’s fine.

So you do that. And then this is a 40 minute; you’re doing this for 40 minutes. So it’s in there. You don’t feel it. It’s nothing crazy, don’t worry. And then water starts going in. Obviously, it fills your large intestine, your colon, with water. And it keeps filling it up. And then what’s going to happen? It’s going to have to come out.

So it comes out, and where you’re sitting, it’s almost like this little drop off area, and it goes down into a tube and a tube of water takes it away. You can see the tube. You can see what’s coming out. Which is the worst part. I thought I was going to throw up. But you can see what’s coming out of your body.

So there’s obviously what comes out of your body in the first place. But then there’s mucus that can get in there. She was talking about all these different things that can come out; it’s pretty f*cking crazy and disgusting. So you sit there for 40 minutes.

The first time, the woman’s like, I can be in here. I can use essential oils. I can kind of massage your intestines; your stomach area. Or do like trigger, what’s it called? Trigger point on your feet type of thing that helps with digestion. And she was like, some people are cool with me in here and some people do not want me in here at all. Even women who have had like 4 babies; they’re like, get the hell out.

So I was like, I thought I would be ok. And she was starting to talk to me as the water is starting to fill up. And I’m like, “I think I need you to leave now.” Because it is so scary. Because you don’t; hopefully you don’t go to the bathroom. I sure as f*ck don’t go to the bathroom in front of my spouse. Not our thing. I know plenty of people who do; not our thing. Not into it. And I definitely don’t want a stranger in there when that’s happening.

Because what happens is you feel like you have the stomach flu. You know when you have the stomach flu, and you’re like, “Oh no.” It’s like pressure in your stomach, and you’re like, “I cannot wait!” And you have to run to the bathroom. That’s what it’s like. Because all this water is filling up, and it has to come out. And you can’t hold it for long. And you’re lying down. So when was the last time you took a dump lying down? Hopefully when you were a baby. Hopefully it wasn’t last week when you were super wasted. Fingers crossed. Think about your drinking if that’s the case.

So, yeah. You lie there for 40 minutes. You get used to the sensation. But it is just like, “Oh my gosh!” It’s just that pain in your stomach. Not like, super painful, just uncomfortable. Then everything comes out. And it detoxes your liver. And then people think it’s dehydrating you, but it’s actually hydrating you from the inside out. Because it’s getting water into your intestines. So it’s super hydrating. But it does get rid of some of your electrolytes, so she gives you an electrolyte drink afterwards to just kind of replenish those.

And then it detoxes your liver. So she mentions that you can feel cold afterwards because of that liver detox. And I went to Target afterwards as I was going home, and I was freezing in Target. I was so cold, it made me get the shivers. So I got that for sure.

Afterwards, she just talks about things that you should stay away from. Raw vegetables. Things that are hard to digest. Like lettuce, red meat is just a little bit since it’s on the higher fat side. It’s a little bit harder to digest than, say, chicken or even I had salmon that night. She recommends lightly steamed vegetables. Lightly cooked vegetables. And she gives you kind of a list there. She said white rice. And I had salmon with white rice and some vegetables. That’s what I had for the rest of the day.

After you get done with this, you kind of go to the bathroom. There’s a bathroom right there. You go to the bathroom, hang out there for a while, make sure everything’s done. But I definitely had to go to the bathroom again about an hour later. And I was like, “Oh no, I need to go right now.” But that was the only thing.

And you guys. I’m talking about all of this because the day after; back to normal. Body has been completely normal. No issues. Even traveling to Lake Powell. And of course, I’m eating things that I normally wouldn’t eat. And more snack food, because we’re on the boat all day. Even with that, my digestion has been totally normal. Back at it. Feeling awesome. Not having any issues.

So I cannot wait to do it again. I’ll probably do it every few months just because. Things just kind of get backed up. She talked about why this can happen. Obviously, a lot of us don’t chew our food very well. We don’t drink enough water. Stress can cause those issues. The sh*t we eat, obviously can cause those issues. So it’s just so awesome. I highly recommend it. This is not paid advertisement. I don’t think I would be like, “oh yeah! I totally want to talk about getting a colonic.” No. No. But, I’m talking about it based on my experience. Which was enjoyable. Frightening, awful, yet enjoyable.

I told my husband I think he should do it. I told him I didn’t think he could take it. I don’t think he could. But who knows. Maybe he could. But I’ve been telling all my friends about it. People who don’t want to hear about it at all; I’ve been telling them about it. I just think it is the best thing. So yeah, go get a colonic. Cool? Cool.

2. Lake Powell update [24:58]

Now, let’s talk about Lake Powell. So I’ve been to Lake Powell. Because we got my colonic, went to Lake Powell the next day. Early in the morning. I’ve been to Lake Powell; this is now four times. So the first time I went to Lake Powell, it was back in my CrossFit competing days. Like I worked out every single day on shore with heavy rocks and all that kind of sh*t. So the first time I got invited to Lake Powell, it was probably because my husband kind of had a crush on me. He didn’t really figure it out for a while. But we had been playing kickball with these friends. One guy worked out at my gym, and then my husband worked out at the gym, and we were all on a kickball team together. So I think we just kind of got the half-ass invite. They’re like; well, we need more chicks. Let’s invite Juli and her best friend Laura. Or Laura and her friend; you know what I’m saying. The two of these chicks.

So we get this invite. And they do this trip every year. They get a houseboat, and 30 people are on this houseboat. It’s like 5 rooms. So it houses like 10 to 12 people. But then people just sleep in the upstairs. People have slept in the wakeboard boats. You just work it out. So like 30 people on this boat. And the first time going to Lake Powell, we drive there. And we usually drive through the night. So we get there in the morning, and then be able to go out on the boat right away, as soon as the place opened.

So get this invite. Fell in love with Lake Powell. It’s one of the coolest trips I’d ever been on. Loved it. Loved the experience. Most beautiful place. So serene. So calm. You don’t have cell service where we were at, and that’s the best. Because being on your cellphone is the worst. And I live on my cell phone. I mean, I’m literally recording this on my cellphone at the moment.

Speaking of, I really want an iPhone 8. I need a new camera. This is like the iPhone 6 and it’s like dying on me. Anyway.

First Powell trip was amazing. Second Powell trip, the next year, comes around. We go a little bit later. The first trip we went early August; we went a little bit later in late August. And we had a couple weirdos on the boat. Like, oh this one f*cking guy. He was the worst. I don’t know whose friend he was. I don’t know who brought him. But I hated him so much. As we’re looking at these huge carp or something off the side of the boat one night, this guy brings out his gun and starts shooting the fish.

I’m like, first of all, why did you bring a f*cking gun? You f*cking weirdo. And then number two, you can’t just shoot into the water! Ugh, I f*cking hated this guy. He was such an idiot, and such a drunk, messy person he fell and cut his foot open and bled all over the boat. He was just one of those messy drunks. Why do people have to be messy when they’re drunk? I just black out and walk home. I just keep to myself. I do the Irish goodbye. I go do my own thing. And this guy cuts his foot. Brings his gun out. Thinks he’s so funny.

Our friends; I never even ate this because it was pasta. But our friends made this mac and cheese every year, and everybody loved it. And they’re making it, and he’s like, “I can make it a better way.” And completely ruined it. He ruined this trip. So not only was he the pits, but at that point me and my husband were then just boyfriend and girlfriend, but he didn’t want to call me a girlfriend. So we just kept breaking up and getting back together, and I hated him but was so in love with him. It was just the worst time in our relationship during that second Lake Powell trip. I almost didn’t go on it.

And then, it just rained the whole time. It just rained and rained. And when we drove out there, all of our suitcases were in the back of the boat, and it rained all in the boat, and my suitcase got soaked. And all my clothes never dried. So I was freezing cold the whole time.

Then the third time we went on Lake Powell, we went in our friend’s houseboat. He owns it with a few other friends, so it’s kind of like a timeshare for them. So we went out with him. And it was just my husband, two of our friends; who just had a baby yesterday. Congratulations Ben and Sarah. Their cute little baby boy. 8 pounds 5 ounces. Little chunk. He’s going to be so athletic. He has really college athlete parents.

Then, my husband and I, and then our two other friends. So it was only 6 of us on this whole houseboat, which was amazing. And we made fancy dinners every night. We had cocktail competitions. Everybody had to bring their own cocktail ingredients and make it for the group, and then we voted who did the best. It was just so much fun. It was perfect weather. We surfed and wake boarded the whole time. It was just amazing. So third trip was awesome.

So now, a couple of years later, our friend’s houseboat is broke. They’re still fixing it. So we stopped by just in case on our way to Lake Powell to see if it was fixed, and it wasn’t. So what we did this year, we drove to Lake Powell. Because to go to Bullfrog Marina from Denver, it’s like 7 to 8 hours, just depending on how fast you are and how many times you stop. And you can stay in hotels in the marina. So you don’t have to do a houseboat. Highly recommend doing a houseboat, because it’s the best experience. It’s so much fun. It’s like just having your house right there with you to go home to every single night. It’s just so comfortable.

So this time we really wanted to make Lake Powell happen, so we’re like, ok let’s just get hotel rooms. So we got a hotel room in Bullfrog Marina the first night. So we get there, we check into the hotel. And we’re there by 3, so we go out on the boat. And just surf and have a great time. The first night is great. Then we ate at the Bullfrog Marina hotel’s restaurant. Decent restaurant. And then we stayed the night there, and the next day we literally pack everything from our cars and from the hotel into our boat. Luckily we had a Malibu, like a 2017, I think it’s a 25-footer or something. So it had a ton of space. Water break. Got to keep that colon hydrated. Gross.

So, we had a big boat, so we were able to fit everything really comfortably. So we took food so we’d have lunch on the boat. Snacks. Any drinks. All of our clothes. Wake boards, surf boards. Literally everything is on this boat. So we head out the first day; the first full day to go to Page Marina. Which is almost 100 miles from Bullfrog. So it’s a good distance. And that’s lake miles. It’s a good distance; takes a few hours. Especially when you’re surfing. And we know we’ll have to stop for gas. So we kind of have a spot that we’re going to stop for gas.

So it hits about 11, and all hell breaks loose with a storm. We knew we were getting into a storm that day, but we didn’t know that it would be a f*cking torrential downpour storm. So this storm starts up, and it just comes in hard. Wind is blowing at like 50-60 miles per hour. I looked this up, that’s how I know. I don’t know wind speeds off the top of my head.

But this wind starts coming in. It starts dumping rain. And then the hail starts. And it’s like little pebbles of hail. I just have a towel over me, just crunching down. Because there’s nothing I can do at this point. And then my husband, poor guy, captain of this boat, is freaking the f*ck out because he can’t see pretty much past his windshield let alone the end of his boat. And if he can’t see in front of him, houseboats or other boats can’t see in front of them, either. So it is very likely that we could hit another boat and capsize or f*cking ruin this boat that we’re borrowing.

So we’re pretty much just chugging along, because now we’re almost out of fuel. We’re trying to find Dangling Rope Marina, but it’s off to the side. You can’t see it unless you know where you’re going, and we don’t. So then we know that Antelope Point, which has gas isn’t too far, so we’re kind of just chugging along, trying to wait out this storm. Trying not to hit another boat, or hit a sandbar, or hit rock, or whatever the f*ck is sitting in the middle of the lake that you can’t see. And luckily, as we’re chugging along, we find Antelope Point, which has a cool restaurant, and gift stores and convenient store, and it has gas.

So we get in there, and we run into the convenient store. The guys are out there getting the boat locked up. And then they’re helping other people pull their boat in without the boat hitting the marina, and f*cking ruining the boat. So then we just kind of wait out the storm. And the winds are so intense, that it ends up breaking the dock at Antelope Point. Like, snapping the dock in half. And then all the power is out, so nobody can get gas. So people are also stuck here, and can’t get anywhere. And you don’t want to go anywhere, because you can’t. Because these winds are so intense.

We keep seeing these houseboats trying to come in out of the rain without dying. And these houseboats are getting swept away. They can’t get the boat to come in. It’s so terrible. The coast guard found a bunch of random boats that were most likely swept away from the marinas. And then this poor 80-year-old woman; I’m not sure exactly what happened. I read a short article about it. But their houseboat was swept ashore, and she got, I’m guessing pinched between something in the houseboat, and her arm was severed. She had to get; I think it came off. Not even have to get it amputated later, I think her arm came off. And she lost an arm during this storm. It was f*cking crazy. Sucked.

We were out of gas, so we were stuck there. Luckily, my husband helped this guy bring their boat in, we were talking to them, and he was like, “Oh, we have gas. You can buy it off of us. Thank you so much for helping us.” So we bought gas off of them, and we were able to get out of there once the storm kind of backed down. Because it was a mess at Antelope Point.

And then all these drunk people were yelling at us while we were leaving. Like they were mad at us we were leaving. It was so weird. And Antelope Point is like; this is me being judgey. But Antelope Point is like a marina; I don’t know if it’s considered a marina. I don’t know what it is. It’s a spot where all of the speed boats; and these speed boats that cost like $200 to $400,000 that have multiple engines and use gas like nobody’s business. All these people are kind of assholes in there.

Oh my god; they had this one group. God, I hope they don’t listen to this podcast. No offense to you guys. But they had this one group of all these speed boat people, and it was like a club, obviously. And they all race each other. And all the dudes had these hats on, and the girls all had these dresses on that said “Panty droppers”. And that was their club name, was Pantry Droppers. And all these women were obviously like all plastic surgeryied out. Hey, I’m a pro plastic surgery; you go girls. They all had so many fillers in the face, so it was super obvious. And they’re hanging out with these dudes who are so ugly!

I’m like, you guys are trying so hard, and these guys don’t give a f*ck. And they’re super messy drunks. Really loud. And they have hats on that say Panty Droppers. God, I sound like such a judgey b*tch. I’m just saying, ladies, why are you going for these dudes? You’re trying your ass off. Go for a hotter dude. Maybe you’re going for the rich guy? Go for the hot rich guy. I don’t know. I sound like such a judgey b*tch. I know nothing about these people other than they weren’t very polite, and they had Panty Dropper dresses on.

Sorry, that was rude. I was mean, I apologize. It was just a lot to take in. It was great people watching, let’s just say that.

So we get out of there, and then we make our way to Page Marina. Page is huge. I’d never been to Page. Bullfrog is in Utah, Page is in Arizona. I’d never been to Page before because it’s so much farther for us to drive, and then we’d never really boat over there. But it’s full of super beautiful houseboats. Like yachts. They have beautiful yachts there. These crazy expensive houseboats. So those were really fun to look at. And they have amazing resort with pools and firepits and they have a really great restaurant. It had a ton of gluten free options on it, which was really cool. We ate breakfast and dinner there almost every night, and always had great options. Never had stomach issues from it, which was great.

We went to the pool; they had a hot tub. It was not hot. Which was very needed after that storm. But what sucks is we’d have to take everything out of the boat. Like, we’d leave stuff in ice. But we’d take all of our clothes, anything else that we needed, all out of the boat, close the boat up. Put the cover on. And tie it up for the night. Walk up the huge hill up out of the marina with all of our sh*t. And go to the hotel, which was even farther. And then leave all of our stuff in the hotel room.

We stayed a couple of nights in Page. And then we boated back to Bullfrog to stay one more night, and then leave the next morning. My poor brother-in-law had so many spider bites from the night in Bullfrog. The last night. So our last night in Bullfrog, my brother-in-law was trying to pay. So all of us went back to the room, and he’s just kind of waiting there. And he asked this other girl. He’s like, “Can I get our check? We’ve just been sitting here for a long time.” And she’s like, “Yeah, who was your server?” He’s like, “I don’t know. This dude here.” And she’s like, “Oh, ok. He’s dealing with a widow problem. A black widow problem.”

And then my brother-in-law, the next morning, after we slept at that hotel woke up with probably 8 to 9 spider bites all over his body. A little bit sketchy. Especially because I saw a spider nest above his bed the next morning.

So, Bullfrog doesn’t have the newest of hotels. The nicest of hotels. But Page had really great hotel. It was super nice. Loved staying there. The staff was really nice. They had a coffee shop. And both marinas had Wi-Fi. Not great Wi-Fi, just in case you want to go there and work. I couldn’t get half the work I needed done, but I still got plenty of stuff done for that time.

But, yeah. It kind of turned into a bust. Because every day on the lake. In Page, it was like 10 degrees warmer than Bullfrog, luckily, but it only got to maybe 85 degrees. And when your boat is going quickly, it gets pretty cold pretty quickly as soon as the sun goes behind the clouds. If you’ve been out on the lake at any point, you know that. So I was wearing sweats and a sweatshirt and pants and a hat almost the entire trip. I got some great surfing in the first day or so. First two days. And then the last day we were there, I didn’t even get in the water other than to pee. Great peeing water. Water was warm. But it’s like, you don’t want to get out because you’re going to be freezing the rest of the time as the wind is blowing.

So that was just kind of a bust. So I feel like; I told my husband, I feel like I want to go only in the beginning of August. Because it’s started to cool down, but it’s still like 100 degrees. And if you’re out on the lake all day, you want hot weather. I want it to be 90s to 100 degrees. Not in the 70s and 80s and microburst storms that severe people’s arms. But that’s just me. That’s just what I’m looking for.

And then we had to drive the 8 hours; it probably took us longer because as soon as you hit mountain traffic in the mountains of Colorado it just becomes a sh*t short. Which is why I don’t snowboard or ski. Because I’m not into sitting in traffic for hours on end. And we had to drive back. And now I’ve had a knot in my back, because I kind of sit slanted whenever I drive. I don’t have proper posture. Or I’ll put my foot up, pretty much by my face. I don’t know how that’s comfortable. And it’s not, on your back, later on.

And I was driving with my brother-in-law and his girlfriend. So I couldn’t listen to any of my murder podcasts. So that would have been really great to listen to podcasts on the way there. Or on the way back. But people don’t really like true crime unless they like true crime. So I didn’t get to listen to any of those. A lot of times they slept, or I didn’t even want to talk anymore and people would want to talk.

So it was kind of a bust. I was pretty bummed. Because this is like the one vacation my husband got to take this year, and he was stressed out the whole time because he didn’t want this boat to get f*cking ruined. And it was an expensive trip. To stay in these hotel rooms; this is why we all stayed in a hotel room together. So we didn’t even get private alone time. Because they were like $350 a night. That is f*cking expensive for not a super fancy room. Yeah.

So it turned out to be an expensive trip, and a bit of a bust. But my brother-in-law was so happy. He is 23. He actually turned 23 when we were out on Lake Powell. And he said it was the best trip he’s ever taken. And he was so happy, and that made us so happy. So it was totally worth it. But I’m ready to go back out on Lake Powell next year and get a houseboat for sure. Because Lake Powell is one of the most beautiful places you’ll ever be. Every turn you make it’s like stunning.

We went to Rainbow Bridge. We went to I think it’s called Clear Creek in the Escalante River. It’s like this little channel that you go back. We call it the bat cave, because it’s almost a cave feel. But it has an opening at the top. And you can do some cliff jumping. And they have a rope that you can climb up on. And you can go into this farther little canal where the water doesn’t reach anymore. And we’ve all gone to that spot before.

I actually almost cried at one point when we had to do this jump, because we had to jump right foot to the right, left foot to the left on another rock, and then out. And I was scared I was going to slip and break my face open. And you know what, I like my brain where it’s at. But I was fine when I jumped off of it. But I almost cried. But this time, someone put a rope in so you can climb down the rope. Which thank you, to that person out there. I appreciate that.

Sorry if you can hear Jackson chewing on his bone. He’s loving this new rug that I just got. Just FYI, I don’t know when this podcast comes out, if it will still be the case. But World Market has a ton of rugs. I know this sounds like another plug. {laughs} But I’m for real. I just bought a rug there. And luckily, they didn’t have it in store so they had to order it to bring it in the store. By the time I got in the store, it was on sale for 50% off. No big deal! So I was like, hey can you price match me, b*tch? I didn’t say b*tch. And they’re like, oh yeah for sure! And I’m like, I love you!

So I got this new rug because ours was looking a bit dingy. Because Jackson had probably thrown up on it 47 times and rubbed his butt on it like a nast-ass. Dogs are gross. He should go get a colonic honestly. This podcast has a lot of poo in it.

So yeah. Lake Powell was a bit of a bust this year. But I’m not giving up on it. I’m going to make sure a houseboat happens next year. And I’m going to crush that houseboat. It was wonderful. So yeah, that’s how the past week has been. Colonics, car accidents, and Lake Powell. And a new rug. That’s a big thing in my life. The only problem is, our big trash day doesn’t come. Where they take extra trash. It doesn’t come for another 2 weeks. So I have this rolled up rug in my living room, along with our new rug, and I don’t know what to do with it.

And I thought about taking it to a thrift store, but I feel bad. Here’s my sh*tty ugly rug? Tell me what to do. If you think I should take it to a thrift store, let me know. Because I have some time. I have two weeks before the big trash comes. Do you think somebody would want it? I love the rug, but it needs a deep shampoo. So then, will anybody take that? I don’t know. Tell me. Tell me what you think. Come over the blog;

3. Weekly blog recap [48:32]

If you’ve missed anything on the blog lately. I’m going to pull it up and see what I’ve been posting. Because now it’s been two weeks, and I’ve had some fun recipes on the blog. I wonder if I’m even pronouncing this right. I don’t even know how to pronounce it and I made my version of it. But pastelon? Pastelon. I don’t know. It’s like a Puerto Rican plantain lasagna, if you will. I made that this week. I did an applesauce spice bread. So for people who can’t have coconut or nuts, this is a coconut free and nut free recipe. So you should definitely check that one out.

I did a recap of Lake Powell, so you can see the recap of where we stayed and what we did while we were there. I shared Greek yogurt fluffy waffles. If you can’t have Greek yogurt, don’t sh*t the bed. Don’t worry, I have plenty of other waffle recipes on there. And then I did a one pan baked lemon and dill chicken and potatoes dish. It’s like one pannish. Kind of. I also made a taco lasagna. I think I talked about that last time on the podcast. But I don’t care because I really liked that dish. It was a taco lasagna casserole, and it’s divine.

And then this week I’m talking about bras, for all you ladies out there who need some boob help. I’m talking about a really cool bra that I am obsessed with. And then I shared this little modest look. I’m not much of a modest gal, obviously. But I shared a modest look last week on the blog. So I have all kinds of stuff on there. All kinds. And I’m also talking about the importance of rest. Because all you people who work out like f*cking crazy and never take rest days, believe me, it will catch up to you. So I’m talking about the importance of rest in my weekly workouts post.

So I have a sh*t ton of stuff on there. So head to That’s where this podcast started in the first place. And let me know about the rug situation. Leave a review of a recipe. And don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe this podcast. Ok? Ok.

Well I need to head to the grocery store, because I’m cooking a recipe today, and I’m also recording a podcast for another podcast. Like, I’m going to be on their podcast this afternoon. So I have to get all prepped and ready for that. So I hope you have a wonderful week. Thanks for listening to my colonic story. I’m sorry if I made you throw up. But you’ve got to talk about that kind of stuff. Only to your close friends, like me. So, go get one. They’re awesome. And if you have any questions, or you just want to chat, feel free to leave a comment on my website. I’m terrible at getting back to emails, but I always get back to comments. So come chat. Let’s be best friends. Hope you have a wonderful weekend. Chat with you soon. Bye-bye for now.

Today on the podcast, I’m talking about all kinds of random ish. A guy riding his bike down the highway (drugs obviously involved), getting a colonic (aka a professional enema) and going to Lake Powell for the 4th time and […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking about all kinds of random ish. A guy riding his bike down the highway (drugs obviously involved), getting a colonic (aka a professional enema) and going to Lake Powell for the 4th time and […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 52:01
Listener Questions – Episode 50: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 09 Sep 2017 13:03:11 +0000 28 I asked what questions you guys had and I answered as many as possible in this weeks episode! Talking beauty products, collagen, food cravings, fitness motivations, dealing with social media, and my newest coffee obsession! ____________ Support the podcast by […] I asked what questions you guys had and I answered as many as possible in this weeks episode! Talking beauty products, collagen, food cravings, fitness motivations, dealing with social media, and my newest coffee obsession!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 50 Transcription!

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: Well, hello from my couch. I am Juli Bauer Roth. Welcome to the 50th episode. That’s five-zero. Episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. If you’ve been here from the beginning, way to go. I don’t know how you’ve lasted this long with me. I really don’t. Especially with my yawning. I’m about to yawn just thinking about; ugh, I can’t. Oh my god. How. How is it possible? I just think about yawning and then I start yawning. And then you’re worried you’re going to yawn.

It’s kind of like sweating. If you’re a person who profusely sweats, like me. And you’re like; oh my god. I don’t want to sweat through this T-shirt, whatever. I’m going to something important, I don’t want to sweat through this dress. And as soon as you think about how you’re going to sweat through something, you do. So I’m yawning. I hate myself. I literally hate myself. I’m going to get some water.

It’s so great when I have someone else I’m recording with, because I actually don’t yawn. If you listened to last week’s episode with Cassy, not one. Not one yawn in there, ok? That was pretty f*cking rad. And isn’t she the best? She’s so freaking cool.

I’m trying to schedule some new interviews with some kind of random people. A food person, a workout person, and they’re dudes. So hopefully that comes to fruition. Because I’ve only had one other dude in here; the owner of my gym. And he’s traveling the world right now with his girlfriend or something, so I don’t see him anymore. F*cking turd bucket. Anyways. I’m going to have some other dudes on the podcast, so stay tuned for that. That will be quite fun.

I am getting excited, because I leave for Lake Powell soon. I’ve got a few more days. We leave during the middle of the week next week. And we’re driving out there, and we’re actually staying in a hotel. Which we’ve never done. We’ve always stayed in a houseboat. But, our friend’s houseboat that we went on last year. The first two years, it was like a group of 27, and we rented a houseboat. And then the third year I went, it was on my friend’s houseboat. And then get this; sorry I was thinking about yawning again. I hate. I can’t. I f*cking can’t.

Ok, so get this. So, he hires a company to take the houseboat out for the season, and they call them, and I’m kind of rounding out the story. There’s a longer story to it. But they call him, and they’re like, “There’s something wrong with your houseboat. You should check it out.” So I think he drives out there, checks it out. All of the cabinets, like in the kitchen, are all on the floor. Like they have fallen off the side of the boat. So obviously the boat had been dropped as they’re pulling it out. And they won’t admit to it.

And you have nobody else to turn to, because it’s f*cking Lake Powell. I don’t know if you’ve been to Lake Powell, but there isn’t a lot going on out there. And I’m judging right now, but the people who are out there don’t give a f*ck. They’re like; hey, we already got your money. I don’t care. So they’re not fixing anything. It’s been like 2 years now of it not getting fixed. It’s just a total pain, especially when he’s 8 hours away from Lake Powel. So it’s been such a mess.

So this year, with that friend, we were like, how about we go to Lake Powell and we’ll stay in Bullfrog. If you don’t know anything about Lake Powell; sorry to be annoying. But there’s maybe more than two, but I only know of two different marinas. But there’s Bullfrog, and that’s kind of the closer one for us. So we’re going to drive there. Stay in Bullfrog. And then boat over in our wakeboard boat to the other marina, to Page. Which is, I think, I don’t know how many hours. A few hours by boat.

So, then we get to Page, and Page has restaurants and bars. It has more of a town than Bullfrog, which is just the marina. And one hotel and a restaurant. So Page has more options. So we’re going to hotel it. All bunk up together in a group of maybe; how many. There’s five of us, I think. All bunk up in the hotel together. Because it’s of course, expensive. Because they can. So yeah. That’s what we’re doing. I’m so excited to go to Lake Powell. Lake Powell is one of my favorite places ever. Literally ever. It’s one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever been. And that’s saying a lot, because I just went to the Caribbean.

Which, by the way, cannot imagine what all these families are going through. Just want to; I’m not a religious person. I’m not a spiritual person. But I’m sending my thoughts and my hopes to everyone that is affected by these two hurricanes. By Hurricane Harvey and Hurricane Irma. I cannot imagine. The Caribbean was literally just destroyed. Places have been completely destroyed. Places we were just at a few weeks ago. I cannot imagine what these people are going through. Especially the people out in Houston, and what’s going to happen to Miami soon.

My husband and I; we got a new TV the other day. And we were trying to hook it up, and it was just being a pain in the ass of connecting. And then the volume wouldn’t work on the regular remote, so we had to use a second remote. And we both look at each other, and we’re like; why the f*ck are we complaining right now? I cannot imagine what it’s like to go through; to lose everything. I’ve had a family member, their whole entire house burnt down. They lost everything that they had built, and I could not imagine going through that. And then seeing that on your entire block, and your entire town. Your entire city. It’s like, I just can’t imagine it.

So I just want to say, just a quick thought to all of them. I’m not; that’s not what this podcast is for, to talk just completely about that. I’m trying to make people laugh and just have an easy conversation. But I talked about it on my blog this week, and shared places that you can give back to. It’s amazing how many people have come together to raise money.

I don’t know football; I don’t give a f*ck about football. But one of the guys, I think he is a football player in Texas. And I don’t know his name, and I’m sorry. I’m not trying to be an asshole. He’s raised like $29 million. His goal was $200,000, and he’s raised $29 million. That is out of control. It’s just amazing what I’m sure small amounts of money coming in. People just giving $10 here, $100, $1000 has made such a difference. And if we can continue to do that for any of the families that are out there, that is huge. So, just sending some love that way. I can’t imagine what they’re going through.

But anyway. Let’s talk about; I have some cool questions. Oh my god; Jackson is lying next to me, and I just noticed that he has tree sap all over his feet. Lovely. I love that on my couch. I love tree sap on my couch cushions. That is so cute.

Ok, so I’ve got to get into this pretty quick because there are amazing questions. I wrote on my Instagram this morning; this is Friday. And this podcast will come out on Saturday. So I asked if anybody had questions. And I always get really nervous when I ask that, because I’m like; “Nobody is going to write.” I’m like, “Oh my god. There’s going to be like three questions, and I’m going to have nothing to talk about.” So you guys are f*cking awesome, for everyone who left a question. If I don’t cover everybody’s question, it’s probably because I’ve talked about in previous podcasts. So I have multiple listener questions episodes; go back in those and listen to them. They have all kinds of random questions on there. And I think they’re easy listens.

But today, I’m trying to make it a little bit more organized. Because just not all over the place. So I put it in different sections. Like I have a skin section, I have collagen, I have fitness, food, and then I have some random questions section. So I kind of spaced it out. But, there’s something I want to talk about that’s been going on. Because it’s been really bugging the sh*t out of me.

I went off birth control for 2 months. And I was trying to find out my game plan. Because if you’ve listened to my podcast about not wanting to have kids anytime soon, you know that I’m not a huge fan of kids. And I’m definitely not a fan of being pregnant, because I don’t really want to have kids right now. Who knows if that will ever change. But I sure as f*ck don’t want to be pregnant, ok. {laughs} No.

So I was starting to get freaked out. I’m like, “Ok, this is bad. This isn’t good. We’re playing with fire here.” I’m not good playing with fire. So I decided to go back on birth control. And one of my friends told me she had an awesome experience with Nuva ring. So, after two months off birth control, before I got on Nuva ring my skin started freaking the f*ck out. And this is because I ate eggs, and I have a bit of a skin allergy whenever I eat eggs. And people are like, “No, it’s the eggs that you’re eating.” It’s been all eggs, whether it’s super high quality or sh*t eggs at the store. It’s been that.

So I ate a ton of eggs while I was in the Caribbean, because we had eggs for breakfast every day. That was kind of my only option; it was eggs and fruit a lot of time. And I should have specified before I left that I wanted just meat instead. But I just didn’t think about it. So after I got back from the Caribbean, not only was I eating eggs, I was drinking a ton of sugar. Because I was having the Pina coladas and mudslides; just sugar bombarding my system. So my skin completely broke out and I had all these breakouts, like along my jawline and kind of by my hairline and stuff. So my skin freaked out.

So not only was I like, I don’t want to get pregnant. I also don’t want to have acne anymore. So I got on birth control. Got the Nuva ring. The doctor gave me two for free. But I went in to fill my prescription, and it was $115 with insurance. I was like, abso-f*cking-lutely not. No. Well, I bought that one. I was like, ok whatever, I’ll figure it out. And then, luckily a reader told me that she gets hers from Planned Parenthood, and it’s only $40. So I need to go check out that.

But people have been asking about birth control because I talked about it on previous podcasts. And that’s what I’m on now. And coming off of birth control, I had a bit of emotional instability going on. Nothing terrible. It’s not like my food changed or anything. And my skin was staying pretty much the same until eggs were added into the mix. But going on birth control in the past, when I was off of it and got back on it, I was f*cking crazy. Psychopath. And I didn’t have that with this. It’s been pretty even keel. So that’s been pretty nice. I’ve really liked it.

You don’t feel it or anything, inside. That was too much information. But it was weird putting it in the first time, that’s for sure. I haven’t gotten that handsy with myself since I was a teenager, so that was a little weird. But hey, whatever.

So. When I had these breakouts, I got these cystic zits. I got three cystic zits. And I haven’t had those since I was on Accutane years and years ago, like before Accutane. So it was super sh*tty to get one. Because if you’ve never had a cystic zit, you don’t understand. Cystic zits, they don’t go away. They f*cking sit there until they’re small enough that you can poke at them, and then you squeeze them out, and that’s when you get scars. So it’s pretty sh*tty. And I found out when I went to my dermatologist to get on Accutane. I was like, “These cystic zits,” started talking about them. And she’s like, “Oh, I’ll just shoot those with a steroid.” So she just shot them up with a steroid and they were gone, in seconds. I was like, oh my god, this is great.

So, when I had one cystic zit that has not wanted to go away. So today I went in to get it shot up and get it broken up, because it’s almost like wax inside your skin. It’s f*cked up. Cystic zits are so f*cked up. And painful. So depressing. But thank god my skin is getting back under control. We’re back on track. The only thing I’ve been going through; oh my god, I’m talking way too f*cking long. The only thing I’m going through now, not with skin, but with some gut issues I have going on. Which probably did not help my skin either. Is I had some issues while I was in Idaho.

So whenever I go on these trips and work with cities, I tell them, “I want to promote restaurants that are gluten free.” Because that’s how I eat and that’s how many of my readers eat. So I’m trying to promote those restaurants so people know where to eat when they go. And they work with all kinds of different media. Media promotes all kinds of different stuff. So I noticed on my itinerary when I got to Idaho that multiple restaurants weren’t specifically gluten-free. So I ended up changing some of my itinerary on my own, and going to my own restaurants that readers recommended while I was there so I could eat gluten free.

But this one restaurant I went to; first of all, it had literally the worst service I’ve ever experienced. And it didn’t have any gluten free things on the menu. So I thought I was getting something safe by getting a salad. I just got oil and lemon juice for my dressing. And it just had salmon and beets. So I thought I was being pretty safe. But I don’t know what was in there, but my stomach has been f*cked up ever since then. And it’s been like a week and a half now since I got back from Idaho. But I did not blog; don’t worry, I did not blog about that restaurant on the blog if you read any of my travel posts.

But my stomach has not been the same ever since then. I don’t know what I ate. But it’s been really hard to come back from that. So my skin probably acted up a little bit from that, as well. But man, my guts have been all funky. So I’ve been trying to just eat a ton of vegetables. Stay away from sugar. Just trying to be clean. Clean Gene! I don’t know. My dad’s name is Gene, so that’s kind of funny.

So I’ve been trying to deal with that. I had some alcohol over the weekend; I made some drinks at home, and that didn’t help. So I’m trying to keep it super clean. But man, when you get glutened or whatever else. Maybe cooking oils; sh*tty, sh*tty cooking oils they were using. I’m not sure, but that place f*cking sucked. Ugh. I actually posted a picture of my meal. You know what, I’m going to take that down! I posted a picture on Instagram. I’m going to take that sh*t down. Because I know it was that meal. I was f*cked up ever after that. Such a bummer. But anyway.


Ok, I want to answer some questions. Because we’re like f*cking 15 minutes in. 17 minutes! Holy tits! So I want to start with skin questions. Let me get a drink of water, because I’m already on this skin route. So this is kind of skin and beauty questions. So let’s get them. This one is from Danni. She asks, “How soon after cutting out eggs and nuts did you see an improvement in your breakouts and bloating?”

I see a difference when I cut out eggs and nuts within three days, honestly. My skin starts to clear up. Any of the bloating or, I hate talking about bodily functions that much. But any bloating and gas that I’ve had, because of eggs or nuts. Mostly nuts. It goes away instantly. So that bloating takes maybe one or two days to clear up. But the eggs with breakouts, I saw an immediate difference. Especially within a month. So either a month of those two things, cutting them out completely, you’re going to see a difference if you have some sort of allergy to it.

So it might not be days, but within a month when you’re clearing out your system of any of those toxins that your body thinks are toxins, for some reason, you should see a difference. That’s just a Whole30. Why people say doing 30 days, because you’re able to clear the body out and really see how it reacts to things. So a few days for me, but it could be 30 days for other people.

This one is from Brit, she asks, “Question about your skin. How did you figure out what irritants are?” Sorry, I suck at reading, obviously. “I know you have mentioned eggs and nuts causing you to break out.” I think for nuts, I found nuts as the first allergy, and I found this years ago. Because I was just eating an excessive amount of fat, in the source of almond butter. And then I was eating; oh my god, I had such an addiction to chocolate covered walnuts. Me and my best friend Laura, we used to live together and there was a Whole Foods just a couple of blocks away. So we’d end up going to Whole Foods almost every night, and getting a bag full of chocolate covered walnuts. Or she’d get chocolate covered mango; we’d just get random stuff. And I would just eat so much of those. Oh my god, I was so addicted to sugar and nuts.

So, when I was having so much gut issues from the over dosage of probably all the; is it omega-6? I’m forgetting which omega it is. But the overabundance of fat I was getting from nut sources. When I took it out, any of that gas and bloating went away with days. And I was like, “Oh sh*t. I really should not be eating this.” And I really didn’t want to face the music. But I would eat it again and I would have that bloating and gas. So it was like, oh, ok. That’s pretty obvious. So it was just a smack in the face. As soon as I cut something out, saw a difference, add it back in, saw that change. You’re like, oh duh.

The eggs; I am so thankful. I have no idea who this reader is. But a reader; I was just talking about how I was having skin issues on my Instagram. And this was after I had been on Accutane and probably a year later my skin started acting up a lot. Someone mentioned eggs made their skin break out. And I’m like, well, I eat eggs every single day. That’s going to be easy to cut out of my diet. At first you’re like, “Oh my god, what am I going to eat for breakfast?” it’s like, ok, just eat what you ate for f*cking lunch for breakfast. Boom, problem solved. Eat dinner from last night for your leftovers for breakfast, done. So it got super easy to remove eggs. And I saw the difference right away. So I can thank one of my readers for saying that eggs made her break out. It made all the difference. I wish I would have known about that years ago.

Ok, this question. I like this question. This one, I don’t know this total name. But it says, “Have you ever done any fillers?” No, I have not done any fillers. I have thought about fillers. Because my skin; I smile and frown a lot. I frown because I’m just super expressive, not because I’m like, grumpy or something. I just make weird faces all the time. And now those smile lines are really starting to sink in. Plus I have a lot of acne scarring around my smile lines. So I have icepick scarring. That’s starting to sink in more, that kind of makes those lines protrude out more. So I’ve thought about doing fillers there.

But I really don’t want to do fillers for quite some time until I really need them. I probably won’t do fillers until maybe 35. And I’m almost 30 now. But who knows. Maybe I won’t even do them. I don’t know. I think something that has been amazing to help with not having to do fillers is; you know, just saying this. I notice the sh*t on my skin way more because I edit my own photos of me, in outfit photos. So I zoom in on my skin. I whiten my teeth. And if I have a big cystic zit, I’ll edit that out. So I see these smile lines that I used to not have. And I wouldn’t notice that if I didn’t edit my photos all the time. So that’s kind of a downside of seeing your face up close all the time. You judge yourself more often.

But I think what is so important for me, and I had to add this to my daily routine. And I’m going to be talking about this on the blog soon. So if you have any questions, just stay tuned. I’m going to be doing a whole blog post about it. Is microneedling with your own at home microneedle. I use that every single night on my face, and it really just helps rebuild the collagen in your skin. Which helps plump out your skin, and helps rebuild collagen and new tissue.

Not only do I do that night, but then I see my esthetician every month and do their higher-tech microneedling. She does different sorts of lasers, and what is it called? BBL laser. Which is a microneedle one. So I do a couple of different things. I’ve also done ProFractional, which is really helpful to not do the fillers. Because it rebuilds the skin even more, and you get that more plump look. I’ve only done ProFractional once, and I’m too scared to do it again because it was so f*cking painful. You know how you forget pain; women will push a body out of their vagina, and then they’re like, “I want to do it again! It was so beautiful!” Because they forget how awful it was. I have not forgotten with ProFractional how awful it was. It really made such a huge difference in my skin, and I would recommend it to anybody. But f*ck it sucks, ok? It sucks. But it’s worth it. But it sucks.

You can do less intense ones. I remember Chelsea Handler posted a picture of her when she did it. She did 75; I forget what the. I don’t know what it’s called. 75, and mine was like 300. So mine was much more intense. My face was bleeding. It was super f*cked up. If you want to know about any of this, go to my beauty tab. I have a skincare post and I talk all about it. And I have before and after pictures, and it’s f*cking frightening. But so worth it. But nope, I haven’t done fillers.

This next question is, “Lash extensions, yay or nay to Snuffleupagus?” That’s funny. Yes. I don’t do lash extensions; I never have. I’ve heard too many horror stories of people; their eyelashes being really broken and really light after they do them. And I don’t want to keep up with it. I don’t want to go lie in a chair for an hour and a half with my eyes closed. At least if I go somewhere else, like say I’m getting my nails done or toenails done, I can still get work done while I’m doing that. But an hour and a half out of my day, every two weeks or three weeks? No thank you.

And I hate when you need them refilled, and they’re super gross. I think it’s so pretty when they’re all big and huge. But then when you need a refill, there’s like four hairs still hanging on. People’s makeup gets in them, and I don’t know if you can use mascara, but most people don’t use mascara. So then you have these silverish light eyelashes instead of dark. I don’t like them, ok. I obviously don’t like them. So I stay away from them. I just use fake eyelashes whenever I’m doing any sort of photos or going out.

Heidi. “How often do you maintain your brows? I know you get them tinted. I had microblading done last November based on your post, and I love my new brows. They were pretty heinous after way too many years of tweezing.” Isn’t that the truth for anybody out there? “I’m trying to decide if I need a touchup. Also love your podcast. You totally have me addicted to the Vanish podcast.” That’s a good podcast, guys, if you like kind of mystery stuff. It’s really sad.

Anyway. I go get my eyebrows tinted every three weeks, and I think that makes a huge difference. Because as your eyebrows kind of lighten up, it doesn’t look the exact same as when you got them microbladed. And I’ve done two touchups with microblading in just a couple of spots. One spot it didn’t take because I have scar tissue. So she needed, I think, a deeper needle. So she had to touch up one spot. In another spot she was just touching up a couple of hair strokes that didn’t take. So I’ve had two touchups. But that was just in a few spots. It wasn’t like the full eyebrow. And I’ve loved it. I’m such a huge fan of it; recommend it to anybody. I’m so glad that I did it.

Ok, this one says, “I really appreciate your direct attitude of telling it like it is. So my question would be around products you didn’t like. I tried Tula overnight cream, and it smells like rotten milk.” Well, Tula is made from probiotics. And probiotics are kind of gross. So that could be why you think it smells that way. They definitely don’t have this beautiful scented lavender smell, for sure.

But you know, I can’t think of any products that I haven’t liked. Because I get most of my product recommendations from my esthetician. And Tula reached out to me about working together. And I was like, I’m going to try your products. I’m not going to sign onto anything until I see if I like them. And then I loved them. My skin seriously glows from using them. So I haven’t had any products that I haven’t liked yet. I really haven’t. So sorry I don’t have any stuff to talk sh*t about.

I know it can smell a little weird, just because they’re made with probiotics. But they’re worth it, I promise you.

And this other question was, “Do you still love Tula products?” And obviously that’s a yes. They have some new products coming out that they just sent me, so I’m trying them now for the next 30 days to see how it goes, and then I will be sharing what I think on the blog. So stay tuned for that. Because they have some cool new stuff coming out.

“What are your favorite eye and face creams?” Ugh. “What face and eye creams are you loving? I have yet to try Botox, but love to find a good cream. Also, favorite foundation and tinted moisturizer?” So, go to my blog because I have a huge list of products I use. And I use a huge list every day. I use a brand called beyond complexion. I use Tula. I use; why am I, oh Vivant. That’s like one of my main products I use and live by. Love. Those are my favorite face products that I use every single day now.

And then I love Jane Iredale, I think it’s a BB cream. I use that now for my foundation. I’ve loved that. It’s really great coverage, but it’s not heavy. It doesn’t smudge off on f*cking everything. And then favorite tinted moisturizer; oh my gosh, I’m totally forgetting the name right now. And I’m going to look it up, because this has been my absolute favorite tinted moisturizer. I would recommend it to anybody. It matches your skin color. And it has an SPF in it. But it’s really great coverage for pretty light weight. Where is it? How can I not find it? Oh, it’s Revision Skincare Intellishade. Sorry, that’s annoying. I should have looked that up before. Revision Skincare Intellishade. And I have this under the beauty tab in my favorite products. Love it. It’s amazing. So yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Ok. Let’s see. And this last one, kind of beauty products. “Would love to know your thoughts on Invisalign.” So, I did Invisalign, and I was on it for 6 months. And I have loved it. I think if you can do Invisalign, you totally should. It’s super annoying when you have to wear it daily, but it is so better than braces, visually, in my opinion. I loved it. It’s been great. I’m looking at my teeth right now; they look straight. Love it!


Ok, just a couple of questions about collagen. Because I’ve been talking about collagen more often. I started adding collagen peptides to my diet daily. I either use; why can’t think of anything today. I just suck. I either use Great Lakes or I use Vital Proteins. My brain is shot. Great Lakes or Vital Proteins. I know Great Lakes is cheaper, and I’ve loved Great Lakes too. I just tend to pick up Vital Proteins at Whole Foods when I’ve been thinking about it. So I’ve been using that just a little bit more often lately.

But I started adding a scoop of collagen to my coffee every morning and blending it in my coffee. And I swear, my nails started growing way faster. And my hair is longer than it literally has ever been. Healthier and longer than it’s ever, ever been. And I’m not a person; I don’t take supplements. I don’t take protein powder. I don’t swear by anything. And I’m just clean eating; I think our nutrients come from food and that’s where they should start. And collagen has been a game changer for me. Just for hair and nails; love it.

So I use a powder. I don’t know about collagen pills. This question was about pills versus powder. I don’t know about pills. I might as well do the powder, if you can. I hate taking pills, personally. I had bad experiences with pills when I was younger, and I just f*cking hate taking pills. So, the powder is awesome and I just blend it in my drinks.

And this one was from Sarah. She said, “Besides collagen, do you take any daily vitamins or probiotics?” So actually I just started adding a probiotic to my diet. But I’m not going to talk about it until I see how my body likes it and what it thinks. Then I’ll let you know. And I sometimes take Smarty Pants vitamins. And honestly, I use it as candy sometimes. I’m like, “Oh, I want a little sweet treat.” And I’ll have two Smarty Pants. Because they’re super high in sugar. They’re prenatal ones. But no, I’m not trying to get pregnant. They’re just fun to add to my diet. But I think that I should be getting my vitamins and minerals and everything from food first and foremost.

And she asks, “Do you take anything for energy or recovery?” No. Especially energy. If you don’t feel like you have enough energy, it’s important to try to figure out why. Are you not getting enough sleep? Are you not getting enough nutrients in your diet? Is there some sort of stress in your life? I think figuring those things out are very important instead of just trying to supplement it with some sort of food or drink or whatever bullsh*t. And I say food, like an energy supplement food-wise. Food; real food. Real protein, real veggies, that sort of thing. That’s what I think is important.

And I don’t take anything for recovery. I don’t think I workout hard enough to need a specific food right after recovery. I’m not working out multiple times a day. It’s not like I need a protein shake to refill all the resources I just depleted, because I’m not working out again the next day. So I just eat a meal. That’s my recovery. Is eating a real meal.


Ok, let’s talk about some food. This one is from Tish. She says, “I was wondering what your thoughts are.” Ok, I really like this question. “About the many paleo products that are out now. It seems the concept of paleo eating is getting back to our roots and eat non-processed foods for the benefit of digestion and overall health. Now, there are so many products on the market that are technically paleo based on the ingredients used, but if it comes from a package or a box on the shelf, is it really paleo?”

So this brings up something I’ve seen recently. A couple of people tagged me in this. Because this one woman; she just, her blog is about. Or her Instagram, at least, is about going after companies and the ingredients they use. That’s her thing. So she’s going after Rx bar right now. So when I saw this, at first I was like, “You know, this is how I feel the vegans in What the Health are doing to the people who eat meat.” {laughs} They’re just going after what they think is wrong, and will look for any of the information. They will find the information that they need to find to make meat look bad. That didn’t come out correctly.

But they’re going after Rx bar right now, and saying that all the products that they used aren’t the best sourced products. And many people turn to bars and packaged goods. So, here’s the thing. I like this question, because at the end of the day, you should be having most; your main meals should be real food. You should be eating a sh*t-ton of f*cking vegetables. You should be eating good sources of protein. And you should be eating health fats. And that’s what your meals should be. They shouldn’t come from a box. But, if there are products out there that make eating a little bit easier. Say bone broth. A high quality bone broth that’s coming out of a package, but it’s still a high quality. And you can incorporate that in your diet, that’s awesome.

But I think most of your meals; breakfast, lunch, and dinner, should be made by you. Made with simple ingredients. Good nutrients into your body. And then when we have those other moments where we need a bar, or we need some crackers and that’s all we can have on hand, because maybe we don’t have a cooler or whatever else, then sure. But if you want the best; what is the word I’m trying to think of. The best quality in your diet, you need to get the best sources. And when you go into packaged goods, you’re not getting the best sources. You’re not getting the freshest ingredients. So keep that in mind. If you’re having an Rx bar every single day, it’s not the best thing you could be eating. It’s not the worst thing, either. But you could do better. And I think we could always improve our diet.

So I think it’s amazing what the paleo world has turned into. It’s opened people’s eyes into what they should be eating. And looking at ingredients. And taking the time to understand what’s going into their mouth and into their body. But you still have to go back to your roots. And I do the same thing. I’m like, “Ok, I’ve been eating too many bars lately. Or maybe crackers, those Simple Mill crackers. I need to take a step back and not get my snack on. I need to take breaks between meals.” So I have to think about that kind of stuff, and talk to myself to make sure that happens.

At the end of the day, people have to do the same thing, and recognize why paleo started. What is best for their own body. So I hope that answers your question.

Ok. Janessa. “How do you fight cravings when you transition to eating healthy in paleo?” So, transition to paleo is very challenging for me. I try to remind people of that, because I was terrible at eating healthy. I did not eat anything healthy growing up. So, transitioning was very, very challenging. Because I was so incredibly addicted to sugar and sh*tty carbohydrates. {laughs} Which is sugar. So, when I started eating paleo, I was like, ok. How am I going to eat something I still enjoy? So I started just making my own things.

So I made my own banana bread, and I made my own treats. And that was what really got me to fight those cravings. But I had to remember; I was still having sugar. It was this train that I got on. So the first stop was transitioning from the sh*tty banana bread that I was eating to my own homemade banana bread, with better ingredients. But I was still eating banana bread. So that next stop was finding healthier alternatives to that banana bread. So the next stop was cutting back on that sugar intake. So it was a very long; I’ve been doing paleo for 7 or so years now. And I’m continuously learning and figuring out what my body needs and what it doesn’t need.

But the biggest transition was for me, how can I find alternatives? If I can’t have pizza anymore, how can I make my own pizza at home? And that’s what my blog started out as. Was, I want to show people that eating healthy really is possible, and it can be delicious, and that’s why I make all these alternatives. So if you’re having cravings for something, go to my website. I have over 700 recipes just on my website, that’s not even in my cookbooks, of healthy alternatives to help you transition in eating paleo and making better decisions with your food. So I hope that helps.

Mel. “Do you still get cravings for things like fries, cookies, regular pasta? You mentioned once that you cut stuff out to make room in your.” Ok. These are two separate questions. F*ck. OK, I’ll start over. Let’s start with the first one. “Do you still get cravings for things like fries, cookies, and regular pasta, etc.?”

I don’t really get cravings for those things anymore. I mean, I just don’t get cravings that much. For the sh*tty stuff. If I want pizza, there’s an amazing gluten free pizza place here. There’s multiple. So it’s pretty easy to either find a gluten free pizza, or make my own pizza. I have a pizza recipe in my newest cookbook that I love, and kind of is my go-to if I’m ever making pizza at home. So I don’t crave the sh*tty Pizza Hut pizza that I grew up with, because I have great alternatives nowadays. And I know the exact ingredients going into it.

So the only thing I think; I told my husband the other day. I was like, “The only thing I crave,” but I can still make my own pretty much with anything. But no, I just don’t get the same cravings for sh*tty stuff. Because not only does it make me feel sh*tty. But there are alternatives to everything now. It’s so easy to make stuff, and come up with a recipe at this point. Or just find clean ingredients out there. I don’t really crave it. Especially regular pasta, because that would make me feel like f*cking dog sh*t.

Ok, this other one. Mel says, “You mentioned once that you cut stuff out to make more room in your budget for more frequent visits to your esthetician. Any advice on how; because my skin is shriveling.” I mean, it’s pretty easy. Not going out to eat. Not going out for drinks. For me, and I say this a lot. I talk about drinking a lot, because at my gym, I’m filled with a gym of people who drink excessively. And when you drink excessively, you spend a f*ck-ton of money.

When I go out and get a drink, drinks around here in Denver are like $10-13 for a nice drink. Like, a fancier drink. That’s so much money if you’re doing that multiple times a night! So if you’re doing two drinks. Say $20 in drinks, and you do that three times a week. That is so much money you could be saving. Plus all the restaurants you go to. You could cut that out. Depending on shopping, cutting out shopping. And little knick-knacks that we buy and we don’t really use. I think it’s pretty easy to cut stuff out once you start writing down what kind of money you’re spending and where.

In college, I made room for paying for $150 or whatever for a CrossFit membership by simply not drinking. That was a huge difference, because I drank a f*ck-ton in college. So yeah, it’s just looking at those little things.

Ok, what’s next? “What’s one kitchen tool you couldn’t live without?” Ashley asks. I would say a cast iron skillet now. I use my cast iron skillet almost every single day. I just think it makes the best sear on meats and seafood and just cooks like the best flavor. I love my cast iron skillet.

“If you had to eat the same thing every day, what would it be?” Whitney asks. If I had to eat the same thing; I’m going to say three things, because I’m thinking a plate. It would be salmon, broiled salmon, lemony kale, and roasted carrots. It’s the super high, nutrient-dense meal and I love it. It’s my go-to every time I get back from vacation. I’m ready to have a clean meal.

PinchePaleo, which is like the best name ever. “What are your favorite pumpkin spice recipes?” If you go to my website, I have a f*ck-ton of pumpkin spice ones because I love pumpkin season. I have these pumpkin chocolate chip cookie dough cups that I love. Seriously love. Could not stop eating those. I have pumpkin crumb pancakes. Pumpkin spice chocolate chip energy balls. Pumpkin magic bars. I’m looking at all the pumpkin. I have pumpkin muffins that are super easy. A brownie eggnog pumpkin pie. I have a sh*t-ton of pumpkin. So just go to my website. Go to Search pumpkin. If you’re ready for pumpkin spice, basic b*tch, time of year; head there. I’ve got you covered. I am all about that basic b*tch life.

Ok. Lori said, “What is your mindset for keeping your eating in check. How do you just eat dessert in moderation, and how did you get there? And how do you find balance? So, I noticed that my eating is the worst. I’m over eating and eating when I’m bored, when my emotions are out of whack. So I’ve had this a little bit, and I think it comes back to the gut issues I’ve been running into after my trip to Idaho. So if I’m feeling emotional; maybe I’m looking at social media and I’m depressed about that. I have to unfollow people, or whatever. That’s when usually my diet is out of whack.

And I’m like, “Ok, how can I clean things up. How can I make sure I stay on track for the day? I’m not just eating stuff.” So I make sure I have my three solid meals, and I eat them at a certain time of day. And I don’t always do that, but when I’m having a hard time with food, that’s kind of what keeps me in check. I make sure I have a big breakfast, a big lunch, and a big dinner. And then in between making sure I drink a decent amount of water, because that just keeps me fuller longer, so I’m not just turning to food.

And then, if I’m having these issues with food, I have to go down to the root cause. And that’s emotional for me. So I have to say, “Why am I feeling this way? Why am I depressed? Why am I upset about something? And how can I change that?” I have to rearrange things in my own life and decide how I’m going to work on that emotional stability, and that’s going to help with the food long-term. So that’s how I found balance, is my own emotional intelligence, if you will. If you want to take it to the Bachelor franchise. If you don’t get what I’m talking about, you better watch the f*cking Bachelor, ok?

Ok. This one is from Rachelle. “I love that you post so many free recipes.” Thanks Rachelle, I love you for saying that. She says, “Could you list off your top three recipes from your cookbooks?” OH my gosh. That’s really, really hard. I’m going to pull it up, so I can see if I; I’m going to talk about my third cookbook because that is my favorite cookbook. I put my life into this cookbook, so I’m going to talk about that one.

So, ok, my favorites in that book include the breakfast tacos, the pulled pork benedict with green chili hollandaise. I really love that recipe. The lechon asado. If you haven’t tried that, it’s like a Cuban style pork, and it’s super easy. But it is so flavorful. The; maple bacon pork loin. My moo shu pork. The carne mechada, which is Venezuelan beef. I think I already did five. But those are my favorites. Breakfast tacos, pulled pork benedict, lechon asado, carne mechada, moo shu pork, and maple bacon pork loin. Everyone should try those recipes; they’re my ultimate fave. Thanks for reminding me of those.


Ok, this is on the fitness route. We’ve moved past some of the food, let’s talk about fitness. Becks asks, “This may seem silly because it may be a simple answer. But suggestions on how to get motivated to start working out. I’m a mom of three, two of which were C-sections. I no longer have much core strength, but I need to get into a workout routine. Where to start?” That is so hard. When you’re out of your workout routine, finding your groove; especially when you have three kids. I cannot f*cking imagine having three kids and trying to find your workout routine. And I’ve seen many of my friends go through this.

So looking up how to work on the pelvic floor. I think it would be really beneficial; just because I’ve heard of this. I haven’t tried it myself. But you should look up BirthFit. And I think her name is Lindsey, she’s been on one of my favorite podcasts, Girls Gone WOD. And she created this amazing thing. They talk about, what do they say? Refiguring out the pelvic floor. Tightening your pelvic floor. Something like that. But it’s like getting your core strength back. I don’t know if they have workouts, or what their whole jazz is. But BirthFit would be really beneficial.

And maybe just finding a gym. Finding a gym that gets your excited to be there. Whether you’re going to group classes, like an Orange Theory or a CrossFit. Or you’re finding a personal trainer who can help you build that core strength. But at the end of the day, you can always modify no matter if you’re in a group class or if you’re with your trainer. You can always modify and just take it one day at a time. Workouts are hardest I think for the first two weeks. Those first two weeks f*cking suck, and then you get back in that groove and it just becomes second nature. Like brushing your teeth and washing your hair. Just doing those things that you do on a daily basis. It just becomes second nature. And it becomes something you actually crave.

So just figure out where you want to start. Whether you want a personal trainer or you want to do something at home, you can find workouts online. You can go to group classes. Find something that works for you and your schedule, and having three babies. But look up BirthFit as well. I think that would be really beneficial if you’re trying to work on those; those babies f*ck up the stomach! They f*ck that sh*t up. Hopefully your vagina is doing ok.

My esthetician today was talking about how she has a new laser to help with vaginal tightening and lubrication and it helps for women who pee after giving birth. Just a little heads up. If you need some advice, call me up. She told me all about it today. Just message me, don’t call me.

This next one. “Any advice on what to do on a standstill with your body? I’ve been doing CrossFit at home 6 days a week, one day being active recovery. It’s been since April, and I’ve gotten stronger. I started at 121 pounds; today I’m 121 pounds, but I’m still not tight through the ab section. Is it better to cut back on heavy lifting, do more HIIT, or even less weight.”

So, just so you know, with midsection stuff, it often has to do with diet. So you can do all the exercise in the world and not see any change through the stomach. And that very often has to do with your diet. It could do with drinking, depending on how much you drink. But it often has to do with what foods you’re consuming. And everyone is built differently, so maybe you hold more weight in your stomach, not your legs. I’m the exact opposite. I hold all my weight in my butt and legs.

So I would say stop thinking about your weight. Who cares about 121 pounds. I have no idea how tall you are, but that’s not a ton of weight. And if you’re pushing yourself in workouts, and breathing heavy, and I think lifting heavy is important. Just mixing it up between some HIIT and heavy lifting. But I would say look at your diet, for sure. If you’re having trouble around the midsection. Because when my diet is out of whack, I’m a person who doesn’t even gain much weight in my stomach, but I see it right away in my stomach if my diet is out of whack.

Ok, this one is from Sheen. “Can you talk about figuring out what weights you use for your body to still get a good workout, but not too bulky?” So, for me, for CrossFit style weights, our gym is excessively heavy. Because our gym owner is a f*cking freak of nature. So he programs workouts so heavy all the time. Literally, maybe two people a day do the workout Rx. Maybe. So for me, I have done workouts at Rx and even Rx plus before, and I know at this point when my form is going to breakdown. That’s where I cut it off at. So I find a weight that I can do the movement almost perfectly; because nobody is perfect in any of their lifts. But almost perfectly, and that’s the weight that I stick with.

So nowadays I know that I’m not really going to go over 75 pounds for thrusters. I know that I won’t go over 200 pounds for deadlift. I just know numbers by now, doing it more often. And I can feel when I’m pushing it too heavy in the weights. If my knees are coming in at any point. If I’m not feeling stabilized in my lift. I just know I need to cut down on the weight. So I just know by now what lifts I can push it in and what I can’t, depending on my strength, and that’s how I figured it out. So the more you lift, the more you’ll be able to figure out those numbers.

{laughs} This question is funny. Alyssa, “Why don’t you ever workout in shorts?” I literally never workout in shorts. I don’t have any actual workout shorts. I worked out in shorts in the Caribbean because I didn’t want to have sand crusted into my vagina because of pants.

But number one, I see many women work out in shorts, and I’ve seen vaginas come out. Especially if they don’t have the underwear lined. But then you see butt creases. A person will be on the floor doing flutter kicks, and you can see their butt. I don’t want people to see my butt. They see enough of my butt wearing leggings, let alone the actual creases and like weird tan lines. No thanks! I’ve got a huge ass. I don’t need for it to be seen by other people.

And I just feel like everything is out and moving about. I like to feel secure when I’m running a mile. And I feel like in shorts, goodies are just all over the place. I just don’t like the look of shorts. I’m not talking sh*t about people who wear shorts. I don’t give a f*ck what other people wear. But for me, I like to keep my goodies in there. I feel like leggings just do it. So I just fight through the miserable summer in leggings. {laughs}

Ok, Lindsey. “Do most of your 5 days of your workouts involve some sort of running? I know Orange Theory does, but what about the other three days of CrossFit?” So you can actually see all my workouts every single Monday. And that will answer your question right now. But not everybody at CrossFit includes running. We’ve had more running because it’s been summer, so we just run more in the summer at CrossFit, because we can. We kind of try to get it in before the winter comes.

So Orange Theory I do 2 days a week, and it always has running, obviously. And CrossFit, maybe once or twice a week has running in it. So I don’t run every single day that I workout.


Ok, we’re onto blog. Oh my gosh. It’s been an hour. You guys tuning out? We’ll get through these. I’ll try to go fast. I like long podcasts, so apologies if you don’t. Come back later. Pause! Come back. Love ya!

OK. Jen asks, “Over the course of your self-made career, anything you would do differently?” Yes. I would listen to my gut. Everything that I’ve done, obviously has brought me to where I am today, just like we can all say. But I would listen to my gut. I wouldn’t trust as many people. I trusted too many people at the beginning and I got myself into some trouble. And I would listen to my gut. The biggest mistakes that I’ve made personally; aka, getting a tattoo. And business-wise, my gut was saying, “Don’t do it.” And I didn’t listen. So I would go with my gut more often.

But again, those choices that I made got me to where I am today. So I can’t complain. But I would listen to my gut. Because people in business like to screw other people over. So go with your gut. And I hate saying, don’t trust as many people. But, just be hesitant. {laughs} That sounds like such a pessimistic way to live. But if you trust everybody, you get f*cked over. I’ve been there.

Ok, this one is Dionna. And she asks, “I’d love to hear how you manage social media and disconnect, if ever. Obviously, you have to be super connected and present on social media platforms to promote your business. But how do you balance it out with your social and personal life? I’m trying to get a blog running, and it seems like the only way to get traction is to be on social media all the time.”

So yes. I am on social media all the time. What I try to do nowadays. And my husband works a lot, so it helps out with that. But nowadays, I try to be done with my work by the time my husband gets home. And he doesn’t get home until like 7, most night. So then we just have dinner, and we can just hang out, talk. If he has to work, I’ll work. Now it’s football seasons, so I’ll work all the f*cking time. Because he’ll be turning that football on and I’m going to have to entertain myself. F*cking football season. So I spend a lot of time on social media.

And I was so upset. This woman messaged me the other day and it just put a damper on my whole day. She was like, “I really just want to give you some feedback that I’m going to unfollow you because you don’t respond to all your readers.” And on my blog, I try to respond to every single question or comment or something nice. And I try to do that on my blog, because those are the people that I appreciate really the most. They’ve come to my blog, and taken the time to support something that I worked so hard on. And on social media, it’s just hard to keep up with those.

That’s why I love that they installed the like function, so you can just like comments instead of doing a kissy face. Because then I feel like I’m being disingenuous when I’m throwing a kissy face to every single person, or a thank you to every single person.

I don’t comment on people’s social media to get them to say thank you. I comment because I just wanted to say something nice. I don’t care if they see it, I don’t care if I get feedback from it. I’m just saying it because I want to say it. Out of the bottom of my heart.

And it was hard when I heard that woman say that, because I was like, I spend literally my entire f*cking life on social media and I try to tune it out for 3 hours per night to hang out with my husband. And then I get a comment like that. So it’s just frustrating.

But that’s how I kind of balance it. I don’t do a ton of video stuff when I’m doing fun things, because you’re not even in the moment. So if you’re at a concert with friends, or out to dinner with friends. I’ll take on picture, and post about it later. But I just try to make sure I’m not on my phone, looking at it all the time. Because I hate when people do that to me. So snag a photo, talk about it later, but be present in that moment.

But it does. You have to be on it all the time, and that’s just part of the game. And it’s really that not much to give up, compared to what other people have to give up in their business. So that’s how I do it.

I love this question. This next question is, Ander Beth says, “Have you ever dealt with social anxiety or anxiety around having basically to share your life via social media? To only be scrutinized or to have pressure to always share on social media would overwhelm me.” I don’t have much anxiety when it comes to social media stuff. I’ll have times where I’m very frustrated with how social media is changing, or how Facebook or Instagram limits what people can see. So you might not see my posts. And it’s hard when your business is built around that.

But I have social anxiety in actual social functions. I do not like being in social functions. When my husband is like, “Let’s go to this, whatever, event downtown.” First I’m like, oh my god. Dealing with parking is going to be a nightmare. It’s going to put me in a bad mood. Then I have to be around a bunch; like say we’re going to a Rockies game. Parking is going to be a nightmare. Then dealing with all the drunk people, and loud people, and in your face, or bumping into you. Or a guy, one time I was downtown and this guy tried to fight me, downtown. That sh*t gives me social anxiety. And then having to deal with parking afterwards, getting your car.

So I go through all these things in my head. So I don’t do a ton of social things other than going to a restaurant. And I still pick my restaurants based on waiting time. Because that sh*t just gives me a lot of anxiety. People give me a lot of anxiety. So that’s the main thing I have to deal with. But my husband is a very social person and loves to do stuff. So I give in about 50% of the time. I think 50% of the time I’m like, “No, I’m cool you go do whatever you want to do. Hang out with your friends. I’m just going to be by myself because that’s what I want.” And then the other 50% of the time I’m like, “You know what. This is important to him. I’m going to do that.”

But he has been an amazing partner because he knows that stuff gives me anxiety, so he helps me plan ahead of time. Where he’s like, ok where do you want to eat before we go to this event. Let’s make sure we get food in you. We’re going to park here so it’s not a big deal. He helps me plan through things, and talking through things really helps me with my social anxiety. But I really do have social anxiety. But it’s not to the point that I can’t function. I just decide not to go and do certain things, and a stay at home body sometimes. But I don’t have it around social media, for sure. It’s just frustrating or upsetting sometimes with how social media changes.

This one is from Diane, “Do you think you reconsider the name of your brand as you’re incorporating other content into your brand, like travel and fashion?” And you know, I don’t think so. Because if I ever run into anybody, people are like, “You’re PaleOMG!” They never say, “Oh, you’re Juli Bauer Roth!” {laughs} Once in a while I’ll get that, but it’s, “You’re PaleOMG!” People know me by that name. It’s a very easy name. And I see it as a very broad thing at this point. I still share a ton of paleo recipes. But I just share a ton of other content. And I’ve really branded myself as that name. So I don’t see myself changing it. I really love that name. I don’t think so.

This next question says, “Any books in the future for PaleOMG? What’s your most favorite thing about working for yourself and finding different ways to make your own income?” So, no more books planned at this point. Books are very challenging. They’re very few people in the book arena that they can make extremely good money. I won’t say who these people are. I’m thinking paleo. But they will do well no matter what. Those people have great publishers, too.

And the thing about books, depending on how you do it. My book was written. I didn’t get any sort of advance. So then you’re waiting like a year and a half, once you start it. It took me 9 months, and then you wait like 6 more months to get paid, and you don’t know what that paycheck is going to be. So it’s like a free-for-all how much work and time went into this where I couldn’t do the rest of my other job, like blogging, and coming up with new content. It’s a total crapshoot. You could make a lot of money, or you won’t make any money.

It’s just too frightening, and it’s too exhausting. And it’s just not as fun. At the end of the day, it’s not fun. And coming up with new content on the blog, where I can say exactly what I want. A publisher is not changing how I speak. And I know that I’m putting out content that I love and that other people will love. That’s just more fun. I just love that. Blogging is just way more fun.

And I think; my favorite thing about working for myself is I get to do whatever I want. I get to plan exactly what I want. And if that means I blog about beauty tomorrow, or I make a new recipe, or I travel. I get to come up with content. It’s constant creativity, which I think is so cool. And a lot of places hinder creativity. I never get that. It’s definitely challenging finding more ways to make money, but the internet has opened so many opportunities up. So it’s been really fun. I love working for myself, for sure.

“What do you find the most difficult about being a full-time blogger? Did you ever have the fear about not having a steady, reliable salary?” So the thing about blogging is it’s kind of just like any other job. Because in the way that you could get fired from your job. So your reliable salary could go away, just like blogging. But what’s so cool about blogging is instead of making $60,000 a year at your job, you could make so much more. When a business says you can make this much; when you’re working for yourself, the world is your oyster. So you can keep working and keep making more money. Or work less and make less money.

I think the most difficult thing about being a full-time blogger is the fear of how the internet will change. And how those sources of income will change. I think that’s the scariest thing. Yeah. But I never had a fear of it not being a steady income, because you just figure it out. If you lost your job, you would figure it out and you would find a new job. And if this goes away, I’ll find a new income. That’s just life in general. So I don’t think I’ve ever had a real fear about that. But I have had changes where my income changes, and you figure out new things. So no time to have fear.

Ok, we are almost done. Let’s see. Andrea asks, “How did you get a large following for your blog? I’ve tried blogging before in hopes of starting an online nutrition coaching business. Nobody would read my blog.” So I got very lucky. I started out when there weren’t a ton of blogs out there, especially paleo blogs. So mine was one of the; not one of the first, but one of the few paleo blogs out there. A handful of paleo blogs. And that was when paleo exploded, so people were looking online. So blogs exploded, and then paleo exploded. And this was before Facebook and Instagram decided that they would limit who could see your posts.

I just hit it at a really great time. That if you were like, “Oh my god, I love this PaleOMG recipe. I’m going to share it on my Facebook.” Facebook would share it with all of your friends on Facebook. So, say you have 1,000 friends; all 1,000 friends would see it if they looked at their newsfeed. And friends would be like, “Oh, I want to look at that.” So I started getting a huge Facebook following. I was getting thousands of new followers a day. And that was simply because Facebook wasn’t like, “Oh, no we want to f*ck small businesses over and make them pay for their people who follow them already to see their content.” It was like anybody could see the content that I shared.

So that was how I grew a following. And I think what was really important was even when my readership went down, or wasn’t really going anywhere, I kept blogging. And I didn’t just say, “Nobody’s following me. I don’t care, I’m not going to blog.” I continued to blog, and I continue to do that now, with six new posts a week. So I just continue to share content, and I think that’s why people come back. Because even if they leave, they’re like, “I know she’s going to have something new.” They’ll come to my website. Because I’m always going to have new content up there. So I think those are the two biggest things. But I did hit it really at a great lucky time, for sure.

“Can you share any tips or advice about working from home? Considering making a career shift that would be working from home, and I’m worried about self-motivation and lack of interaction.” That’s definitely hard sometimes. You have to be a self-motivated person, I think, to work at home. I have a routine that I’ve gotten down. Every morning I wake up, I make my coffee, I finish my blog post for the day. I make breakfast, I take my dog for a walk. I come back, I work on whatever I need to work on for that day. I go to the gym, I get a workout in. Come back, work more. Make dinner, pause for the rest of the night.

So I’ve gotten the time down that I can take breaks between my work. I can get outside, get some fresh air, walk my dog. And then I go to the gym mostly because; obviously, I want my workout. But it’s social interaction. So I get to actually interact with human beings and talk to someone other than my dog and my husband at night. So that’s really important for me.

The gym is not only good for the body and the mind, but is really good for that social interaction time. So that’s been huge for me, is making sure that I get to the gym, kind of halfway into that day to break it up a bit. But, making a schedule. That’s what I think is important.

Ok, this is the last question about blog and then I have random questions. “My question is; do people ever make fun of you, or judge you for what you do for a living? I know so many people who want to start a blog, but get stopped by what other loved ones and people think. It makes them afraid to put it out there.”

So I don’t know if I get made; well, yeah, I get made fun of. Yeah, for sure. And it’s so funny telling people what I do. It’s very frustrating, because I don’t think people take it seriously. I think they think my husband makes the main income, and I just kind of dilly dally at home all day. It could not be any more opposite than that. I work a f*ck-ton, and it has made him work more. Vice-versa; he works a sh*t-ton so I work even more.

So at the end of the day, people are going to make fun of you no matter what. People don’t like you whether you’re the nicest person in the world, or meanest person in the world. So it doesn’t really f*cking matter what other people think. That’s what I’ve had to figure out over the years. So I just don’t care. It always feels weird telling people that I blog for a living. For a while I went through a stage of saying that I write cookbooks, because people are like, “Oh my god!” When you tell them you’re a cookbook author, they take you so seriously. But then you tell them you’re a blogger, which makes 10 times more than your book, and they don’t take you seriously. Because people just don’t know. And they don’t understand.

So I don’t care. And people have told me that I should go into a different profession. I’m like, you have literally no idea what you’re talking about. So how can I take you seriously. So yeah. It sucks that people don’t understand, but I don’t give a f*ck, either. Because I’m living a wonderful life and creating financial stability for me and my husband in retirement. So, don’t care.


Ok, One Full Plate. Her question is, “So we’re new transplants in Denver.” Oh, ok. Geeze, I can’t read. “Where can new transplants in Denver find legit nice people?” These are random questions guys, so they’ll be kind of all over the place. “In our experience living here for a month, it’s been super hard to find genuine and reliable individuals because they either, 1 – do not want anything to do with transplants. Or 2- can’t relate to us because we don’t have kids. Or 3 – they’re super flaky and want to get drunk all the time.” {Laughs} Well, that is Colorado, for sure.

Ok, so here’s the thing. You’ve lived here for a month. It’s pretty hard to make decent, good, long-term friends in a month. Unless it just falls in that way. So that can be tough. Just remember, you’ve only lived here for a month. Number two; most people here in Denver are transplants. So if they don’t want to have anything to do with transplants {laughs} they’ve f*cking liars. This guy in the gym was like, “I’m a native to Colorado. I was born in Utah.” I was like, you’re not a f*cking native to Colorado. You were born in Utah. Whatever. They’re all transplants here. People are stupid.

What I recommend, for me, find a gym. Find a gym. Because what’s so awesome about a CrossFit gym, is when my husband and I talked about moving to a different state. I know that if I move states, I will have instant friends because of a CrossFit gym. You have something in common. So finding a place. Maybe a running a club. Finding clubs, or gyms, or something that you have in common, that’s going to build those relationships. Because you have common ground to begin with. So I think that’s a good way to find a bond and a relationship and have something to talk about.

Because what are you going to do? Hang out a bar and just hope you makes friends? That’s weird. And then you’re going to be meeting these people who are flaky and want to get drunk all the time! Sorry, but people here love to get drunk. I’m not one of those people, but 95% of them do. So that’s just something you deal with. But I think building those relationships around things you want to do is the best way to do it. But yeah, people just like to get drunk. They love it!

This one is from Ellen. “How did you decide on the neighborhood you bought a home in?” That’s an interesting question. When we started looking at homes, I started looking all around the cities in Denver, because we wanted to be in Denver. And then I just started looking at prices. What we could get for our money. That’s how we found this neighborhood. Because we could get a backyard. We could get everything on our priority list under budget, and we couldn’t do that anywhere else. We had to give up certain things in other places. So here, the only thing we didn’t get was a two-car garage. And my husband’s truck is so stupid big anyways, it couldn’t fit in a garage.

Anyway. That’s how I looked at it. Could we get everything on our list that we wanted under budget? And that’s pretty much how we picked a neighborhood. We’re lucky; I love the neighborhood that we’re in.

Ok, this next one. LuLu la-la-la. “Why don’t you ever post or show your husband? More specifically, his face?” I’ve talked about this actually in past podcasts. I have been chewed out on social media so many times based on how I look or anything I do on a daily basis. So if anything ever said something about my husband in a negative light, I would f*cking lose it. I would literally f*cking lose it. So I decided a long time ago that I wasn’t going to show his face.

The other thing I really hate about social media is; I was hanging out with this person. This guy. Who was in a relationship, and he posted on social media constantly about how perfect their relationship was. And me, the outside person, watching this relationship go down, I was seeing how awful this relationship and unhealthy it was. And I was like, I can’t believe the whole world thinks you have this perfect relationship and it’s the complete opposite. You’re like lying to the world. I never wanted to be that person. I don’t want to put on social media that I have this perfect life when it’s not perfect all the time. Because people just think that everybody has these perfect f*cking lives. And it’s not like that.

So I just chose a long time ago that I was going to keep my person life to myself. And then it became a game of how we could cover up his face in as many photos as possible. So yeah. That’s why.

Ok. “What kind of music do you listen to? Do you have a preference of what you listen to when you workout?” And I literally, the only kind of music that I actually listen to is EDM. I listen to house music, techno. That’s the kind of music I listen to. Whether I’m working out or just listening in a car. That’s the main music. I’m like a top-40 person, for sure. But that’s the main music I like to listen to, and dance to.

“How many hours of sleep do you get on average?” I get 8 hours of sleep usually per night. I’d say 7.5 to 8 is what I always get.

This next one is, “What is your favorite way to order coffee when you’re at a coffee shop?” So I either order an almond milk latte if it’s cold outside. But I usually just get cold brew and I get some heavy cream on the side and add my own heavy cream to it.

And then one more question, “Why do you chose to be gluten free? Do you get negative side effects when you eat gluten, or is it just a general health reasons?” So yes, I have negative issues. Negative side effects when I eat gluten. I get a stomachache, I’m bloated, I’m fatigued. But I also know what gluten does to the body after doing research about it. So if you just do some simple research about the protein structure of gluten and how it affects the digestive system and the gut as well. I don’t want that in my body so I just stay away from it completely and have gluten free grains. I just try not to eat those regularly. But yeah, gluten sucks. I don’t like it. I’m not a fan of it.

This next one, “Have you ever tried Halo Top ice cream?” I’ve never tried Halo Top. And here’s the thing. Here’s why. If I’m going to eat f*cking ice cream, I’m going to eat ice cream. I don’t need it to be under 150 calories and probably taste like air. I’ve never tried it, I don’t know what it tastes like. But I’m not a huge ice cream person anyway. So if I’m going to eat ice cream, I’m eating the real deal. Or like coconut milk ice cream. There’s great ones that have cleaner ingredients.

But I feel like that Halo Top is all gums. Isn’t it like a small amount of sugar and gum? There’s all kinds of different gums in it. I don’t know. Not a fan of it. Seems to weird and fake to me.

“So I notice that you don’t eat a ton of fruit. Is it because you don’t like it, or because of the sugar content?” I don’t eat it because of the sugar content. I mean, who doesn’t like fruit? It always tastes good. But I just feel like I don’t need that extra sugar in my diet. I’d rather get my vitamins and minerals from veggies instead and stay away from fruit. So I rarely eat fruit. If I do, it’s in a smoothie, when I make with a frozen banana. But I just try to stay away from it. If I want some sugar, I’m going to have it in the form of dark chocolate.

Ok, four more questions. Five. Four. Five. “I know sometimes you post about having a late dinner after a night workout. Do you try not to eat after a certain time of night?” I don’t live by that rule. A lot of people talk about trying not to eat after 7 or 8. And, sorry. If I workout late, I’m going to eat dinner. It’s not like I’m not going to eat. Do you need to go potty? There you go.

So, I don’t live by that rule. I usually eat dinner by 7. And if I have a snack, it’s going to be a piece of dark chocolate or something. But no, I don’t live by that rule. I love free! {laughs}

“What is your favorite bone broth brands for sipping. Unfortunately, Broth Rx,” I’ve been talking about this on my Instagram lately. “Doesn’t deliver to my area. If you’re drinking bone broth, do you also put collagen in your coffee that day? Have you ever tried making your own?” So there’s other great brands of bone broth out there. You often just need to look in the frozen section. There’s Bonafide bone broth; love that brand. They have great stuff. Kettle and Fire, they’re not even frozen. They’re on the shelf. So they’re shelf stable, great bone broth, as well. There’s a ton of other brands out there.

I’ve made my own ones, and I didn’t really like it that much. The one that I made. And it stunk up my house for f*cking days. Not into it. Don’t care about making my own, because I have enough resources around me to buy it when I need it. And then when I do have bone broth, I still have collagen in my coffee. Might as well have just a little bit more.

Ok, these last three. “Might be noted, but about your anxiety struggles in the past. How have you dealt with it?” Sorry, I kind of talked about that. I meant to erase that question. But I talked about that. I try to come up with a plan, and my husband does that as well. Just in those social situations, making sure that I know what I’m doing. I have a plan. I have a game plan, and I can get out of it if I want. So leaving, if I cannot be in the social situation anymore, I’m like, ok. I’m out of here.

And people have said that’s an only child thing. No, I don’t want to be around drunk f*cking assholes. Sorry, that’s not an only child thing. That’s a social norm thing. Sorry you’re an asshole, you’re super wasted, I’m sober. I don’t want to be here anymore. So I just try to come up with a game plan, and that’s really helped subside it a little bit. And just some things I just don’t do.

“What’s your recent recipe for your morning cold brew coffee?” There’s no actual recipe for it. I use cold brew coffee, I add malk almond milk to it. I really like that brand. I add malk, and then I add some stevia drops, and then I add a scoop of collagen, and I blend it all. Boom. That’s my recipe.

This is an interesting question. Not interesting. Just because I actually do have an answer for this that’s pretty close to home. “Do you have a hometown murderer from a fellow murderino?” So if you’re not a murderino, that means you don’t listen to the podcast My Favorite Murder. And that’s one of my favorite podcasts. I went to the live taping episode here in Denver. Love listening to them. And every time; they have mini-episodes where people write in about their hometown murders. And then when they’re live episodes, they have someone come on and talk about their hometown murder.

So this a two-part statement. Number one, if you’ve listened to; and I forget her name. And apologies, because she was murdered and it’s so f*cked up. But she was the girl who was in Malibu, and she seemed like she was kind of on drugs or f*cked up, and she didn’t have money to pay for this meal at this super nice restaurant in Malibu, California.

So they called the police, because they’re like, “Something’s wrong with this girl.” The police took her, and they let her go at like 3 in the morning. The police force. They let her go. She had no jacket. And she had no phone. And they just let her go at like 3 in the f*cking morning into the Malibu open landscape, like open area. And she was murdered. What the f*ck. I can’t believe this has not been talked about more often. It’s the most f*cked up thing.

But I was at this event with a Colorado blogger, and I was talking about this. And she was the waitress at the Malibu restaurant who called to the police. She still, to this day, feels bad about it. F*cking crazy. F*cking crazy. But that’s not my story.

Here’s the second story. I have a sister-in-law. Not a sister-in-law. I have a half-sister. I do have a sister-in-law; she’s great. But my half-sister, she’s 10 years older than me. I do not speak to her. We’re not on speaking terms. But this is crazy. And somebody asked me this question the other day, and I was like, “Oh my god, I do have a hometown murder.” So my sister’s aunt. Not related to me, but my half-sister’s aunt was murdered on Christmas day. She was stabbed to death. They never found out who did it. And then my sister’s mom, just a couple of years ago, was murdered. For morphine. In a murder suicide. And he didn’t die, and he went to jail.

How f*cked up is that? We don’t get dark very often on this podcast. That is some of the darkest sh*t I know. That is my hometown murder. Obviously it has full details and f*cked up stuff. But I can’t just end on that, you know? But that was my last question, so that’s kind of how I ended up things. Super f*cked up.

But yeah. That’s what I got for you guys today. I hope this answered your questions. If I didn’t answer any of your questions. If you made it the full hour and a half, and you’re like, “That b*tch didn’t answer my question.” Don’t worry. Just go to You can go right into this podcast, and you can leave me a question. And I will answer it right there. Right there and then. Because that is where I respond to everybody’s question and comment. Because I’m so pumped you took the time to go to my blog.

So go to I have new recipes every week. This week on the blog, I shared two new recipes. I try to share two every single week. This week included a taco lasagna casserole, and then a chimichurri loaded slider recipe. So two; the taco lasagna casserole you have to try. Period. Do it. And then I have a post about Hurricane Harvey and legitimate organizations that you can give back to so you don’t get scammed, because people are f*cked up. I have a weekly workouts post where I talk about what I ate in a day, because I get those questions sometimes.

And then I talked about in my blog post today, I talked about picking what items you should splurge on and where you should save. And talk about winter coats, and making sure splurging on winter coats, because they’ll last for so long. So that’s what I’ve got on the blog this week guys. Now you know what, I made it this long without having to go to the bathroom. I am so proud of myself. I should have left that out, huh?

Ok well I’m going to head out. Thanks for listening today guys. Thanks for making it through 50 episodes. If you have, good on ya. Hopefully I have some good podcast interviews coming up for you guys. And you know what, that’s all I got. I hope you have a great weekend. Keep being awesome. Bye-bye!

I asked what questions you guys had and I answered as many as possible in this weeks episode! Talking beauty products, collagen, food cravings, fitness motivations, dealing with social media, and my newest coffee obsession! I asked what questions you guys had and I answered as many as possible in this weeks episode! Talking beauty products, collagen, food cravings, fitness motivations, dealing with social media, and my newest coffee obsession! ____________ Support the podcast by […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:33:19
Talking Pregnancy & Projects with Cassy Joy – Episode 49: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 02 Sep 2017 12:55:37 +0000 9 Today I’m talking to one of my favorite people – the kind, caring, passionate, and hardworking Cassy from Fed and Fit. Cassy recently announced that she is pregnant with her first little babe so we are talking about body changes, […] Today I’m talking to one of my favorite people – the kind, caring, passionate, and hardworking Cassy from Fed and Fit. Cassy recently announced that she is pregnant with her first little babe so we are talking about body changes, how she’s dealing with all the information out there, and what she’s doing to prepare for her own maternity leave. PLUS we are talking about the Fed & Fit Project!

The Project starts with a 28-day (“path A”) or 3-month (“path B”) food and fitness “feel good reset” and introspective self-study. The ultimate goal of the Project is your personal “Perfect YOU Plan.” Figure out a healthier sleep schedule, hydration plan, mindset around food, personalized nutrition, and fitness strategy. Best of all, do it with a PROGRESS over perfection community approach. You’ll receive daily emails, loads of great videos, access to a massive library of ebooks, worksheets, and workouts (Rx and modified) written by ME!

For those looking for even more hands-on support, Fed & Fit Project also has 6 spots for one-on-one coaching available. Please email asap to inquire!!

The important September dates:

– Sunday, September 3rd: Enrollment CLOSES
– Monday, September 4th: Day 1 of your PREP Week
– Monday, September 11th: Day 1 of your 28-day *or* 3-month Feel Good Reset

To learn more and to get signed up, click HERE!

I worked with Cassy, the amazing creator of Fed & Fit, to help create the workouts for both her cookbook and her program and I’ve seen how this program changes lives. Cassy works so hard to prove that a healthy and happy lifestyle is possible without counting and obsessing. And this place teaches exactly that! You can see a recent success story here! Chelsea is adorable!

Don’t forget to sign up before this month closes Sunday, September 3rd at 11:59 p.m. PT! If you miss this sign up, you can always click here to see when the next one starts!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 49 Transcription!

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

1. Cassy’s pregnancy [10:54]
2. Pregnancy workouts [17:35]
3. Pregnancy information [22:08]
4. The Fed and Fit Project [32:10]
5. New projects for Cassy [43:13]
6. Listener questions: Preparing for pregnancy [50:07]
7. Listener questions: Cravings and aversions [53:07]
8. Listener questions: Prenatal supplements [57:41]
9. Listener questions: Permanent eating habit changes [1:01:39]
10. Listener questions: Cassy’s bubbly personality [1:08:33]
11. Listener questions: Fed and Fit Project while pregnant [1:12:01]
12. Listener questions: Fed and Fit Project while in college [1:13:28]
13. Listener questions: Favorite dessert options [1:16:22]
14. Listener questions: Early morning meals [1:20:41]

Juli Bauer: I’m good, how are you?

Cassy Joy: I’m good!

Juli Bauer: I already started recording, because I just love your bubbly voice right from the beginning.

Cassy Joy: {laughing} I like it. Do you ever listen to that Anna Farris, Unqualified podcast?

Juli Bauer: Yes. Not very often. Which I don’t know, because I love her. But then I’ve been bored other times. And I’m sure people say that about our podcast, too.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: But then I love her other ones. I don’t know.

Cassy Joy: I know. She, when they call people, they do the Skype dial in. And I’m always like; “Oh, I like that! I want to do that!”

Juli Bauer: I know! I know. That actually made me think of that. I just listened to her with My Favorite Murder.

Cassy Joy: Yes, I listened to it!

Juli Bauer: She was on. Oh my gosh, love them. All together.

Cassy Joy: Mm-hmm. They’re so smart.

Juli Bauer: Somebody was talking about Anna Farris today at the gym. And they’re like, “I can’t listen to her because her voice is so annoying.” I was like, god. Think about how many people have said that about every single people out there. That’s so sad.

Cassy Joy: For sure.

Juli Bauer: I’m like, she’s the cutest thing ever and she’s married to Chris Pratt, which makes her even better.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} They’re so cute. I love her.

Juli Bauer: So cute.

Cassy Joy: I can’t think of anything I don’t like about her.

Juli Bauer: Right.

Cassy Joy: Hey, how was that My Favorite Murder live show?

Juli Bauer: It was good. I’m not a huge fan even of listening to the live shows. I just like, when it’s just the two of them. And you know, when you’re at a live show, you have to act a little bit. You have to put on a show.

Cassy Joy: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: And I like it just when they’re on their couches, like banter back and forth. I feel like live shows just feel a little bit more pushed.

Cassy Joy: Mm-hmm.

Juli Bauer: But it was good. We were in the second row, so right up by the stage. It was in this really cool downtown theater. And it was just cool to see them talk. Because I always picture them, the voices switched. Even though I know who both women are, but I always picture their voices differently. Like, I picture Karen on… you know?

Cassy Joy: Georgia.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, Georgia. And vice versa. So it was cool to just see them in person. And Georgia is like the tiniest human in the whole world.

Cassy Joy: Is she?

Juli Bauer: Yeah, she’s so small. She’s like, I could put her in my pocket. She had this cute little baby doll dress on, and these little tiny cute little legs.

Cassy Joy: Aww!

Juli Bauer: And she’s all sitting in this tall chair like a bar stool chair, almost flashing the entire audience. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: But it’s really good. And then they had, of course, the person come on. You know how they ask somebody from the audience to tell a story.

Cassy Joy: Yes.

Juli Bauer: They get this girl on stage, and she’s so drunk.

Cassy Joy: Oh my god.

Juli Bauer: And it’s taking so long. And you can tell that they’re just like, ok. Every time; every time you listen to the live shows you’re like; ok, can you keep f*cking talking. {laughs} But they’re so nervous and this girl was super drunk and it took forever to tell the story. But it was still really good. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: {laughs} Good.

Juli Bauer: I don’t know how I feel about live shows. They feel kind of weird. But everyone’s into it. Everybody was screaming and so pumped to be there. So everybody else loved it.

Cassy Joy: Well that’s good. That’s fun.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Cassy Joy: It’s kind of a fun way to support them, too.

Juli Bauer: I know, totally. And they’re going to Australia, I think. Soon.

Cassy Joy: Yeah! That’s awesome.

Juli Bauer: That’s so badass. Like, the other day. And I am all; the more sponsors you can get.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: The better. I am so supportive of people having sponsors out there. Because I know how this type of business woks.

Cassy Joy: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: But the other day I listened to one of their mini-sodes, and it was seriously more ads than it was stories. More ad time than stories. And I was like, holy sh*t. They can’t even fit in all their ads in one episode. It was a little overwhelming. But I support them.

Cassy Joy: I do too.

Juli Bauer: F*cking get your money, girl.

Cassy Joy: Get it. Get you some. That’s true. I thought the same thing. I was walking Gus, and I was like, “Ohh! 30 minutes left on this walk, this is perfect.” And then I skipped through. {laughs} I’m terrible. I skipped through the ads, and there was 7 minutes of talking. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Oh yeah. So long. I always skip all the ads too. People must use the stuff that they’re talking about. Because those ads keep working with them.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. And they’re good ads. I mean, if I didn’t already have a pair of glasses coming, I’d be getting a pair of Warby Parker glasses from them.

Juli Bauer: Right. I did boxers once.

Cassy Joy: Oh, did you?

Juli Bauer: Yes. {laughs} I bought Brian some boxers because this guy was talking about them on a podcast. So I tried those. They weren’t his favorite, but give it a try. I got a discount.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. That’s awesome.

Juli Bauer: I know.

Cassy Joy: Well, how’s it going? Sorry I’m taking over your show with My Favorite Murder questions.

Juli Bauer: I like it. I like it. Everything’s good over here. Just got back from Boise. You say it with an S, not a Z, ok, Cassy? Get it right.

Cassy Joy: Oh my gosh. I’ve been saying it wrong my whole life.

Juli Bauer: Me too. Unless you’re in Boise, I’m going to say it how I want to say it.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Nobody says it like that. {laughs} So I just got back from that, and I’m planning to hang out with my husband. Get some reconnection time over Labor Day weekend. And that’s about it. How are you, Cassy?

Cassy Joy: I’m good.

Juli Bauer: Where are you? Are you at home right now?

Cassy Joy: No, we’re in San Angelo. Where Austin is from, my husband. And it is September 1st. Which, in West Texas means dove season, so.

Juli Bauer: What’s that mean? There are doves everywhere?

Cassy Joy: Well, they’re everywhere, and they’re available for hunting.

Juli Bauer: Oh {laughs} gotcha. {laughing} I feel like you danced around that.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} I did.

Juli Bauer: “And, well, we like to kill ‘em, ok?” {laughing}

Cassy Joy: {laughing} You know, the symbol of love in relationship?

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Yeah.

Cassy Joy: We’re murdering them.

Juli Bauer: Ok. Ok.

Cassy Joy: I’m actually not. My mom and; my dad comes, and he makes a big boy’s trip of it to go hang out with Austin and his dad and brothers. We came and we went golfing instead. We were like, we’d really like to not be around while you’re murdering those little birds.

Juli Bauer: That’s fair. Ok, I wish I could be you for a couple of minutes, for multiple reasons. But Brian, my husband, recently took up golf. And I wish I could play with him and be interested. But I’m not even interested in learning. How long have you played golf for?

Cassy Joy: Oh, I’ve played it for over 20 years.

Juli Bauer: Didn’t you play it in college?

Cassy Joy: I played through college, but not for the team.

Juli Bauer: Ok.

Cassy Joy: I played on the high school team and middle school team. I was not nearly good enough. Oh my gosh, have I ever told you the story about when I realized I wasn’t going to play college golf?

Juli Bauer: {laughs} No.

Cassy Joy: {laughing} I was in high school, and my coach was so optimistic. He was like; “You are,” I think I was a sophomore. Which was right when I really would need to be thinking about going on to a collegiate team. He was like, “You’ve really got it there. You’re almost at the next plateau. You just need to drop about 5 or 6 strokes, and you’d be really competitive.” So I really started to work on it.

And I was out golfing with my dad at some municipal course. Because that’s where I grew up golfing, with just my dad on Sundays. And we were out, and there was this guy. I was having the best round of my life. And there was this guy on the green of a par 3. So it’s a really short hole. And he was wearing an A&M baseball cap and an A&M jacket. And I was like, “Oh my gosh, it’s a recruiter!” and I’ll never forget, I think I had like an 11 on that hole. It was obscene. It was way too many strokes. I totally crumbled under the pressure. And it was just a random person walking by. And my game got awful after that. I just started to stress about it. And I decided at that point, no college golf. And then I stopped keeping score for years. I just did smiley faces and sad faces.

Juli Bauer: Oh my god, that’s the best.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} It was awesome.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} It’s like, how kids get stickers in class instead of grades.

Cassy Joy: Totally! I couldn’t handle the number. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs} How often do you play golf now?

Cassy Joy: Well I probably play maybe, it averages out to about once every couple of weeks. We really like it.

Juli Bauer: Does your husband?

Cassy Joy: Mm-hmm.

Juli Bauer: Does he play with you?

Cassy Joy: Yeah. Austin and I play together. My mom and dad play. We’ll go out on the weekends and the four of us will play. Both my sisters play golf. And then my mother-in-law plays golf. So anytime we come and visit my in-laws, she and I will go out and play. And we’ll go do tournaments together. It was such a fun way for us to kind of get to know each other away from the boys. I just love it. It’s a really long sport. We were joking about it today. We all had a bad hole on this one. And we’re like, “Why do we do this sport. It’s really expensive. It takes up a lot of time. And it’s really stressful.”

Juli Bauer: Mm-hmm.

Cassy Joy: But at the end of the day, you get four and a half hours of quality time with people.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, four and a half expensive hours of quality time. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: I’m like; so Brian started playing and I’m so supportive because his work has been so stressful that I literally was like, “My husband is going to die from stress. He’s going to have a heart attack, and I am going to be a widow at age 30.” And he started taking up golf, and that stress has completely gone away. He has something else to think about. He started taking lessons; which it’s a secret. Because he’s trying to get better than his friends without them knowing. So he started taking lessons.

So, now he’s looking at these golf clubs, and they’re like $400. I’m like, what the f*ck? And he’s like, “Do you want to go to the Dominican Republic? There’s the best golfing place ever in the Dominican, or Bahamas, or something like that.” I’m like, ok. You just couldn’t go on a two-day trip to Idaho with me, but now you can take this f*cking trip to the Bahamas to go on a golfing trip? Who are you?

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: But I’m supporting it, because he will not have a heart attack in the next year. So I’m like whatever. Waste money on golf clubs. I don’t care. I don’t care!

Cassy Joy: Yeah. {laughing}

Juli Bauer: But hot damn, it is the only sport that costs money to practice. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: It’s true. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: F*cking stupid, ok. Anyway. Anyway. We have to get on with this podcast.

Cassy Joy: Ok. I’m ready.

1. Cassy’s pregnancy [10:54]

Juli Bauer: So. Everyone. If you have not listened to my podcast with Cassy on before, you should go back. I have episode 18 with Cassy. And we really kind of give a breakdown of Cassy, her background. Cassy is the writer and creator of And we met years ago through the blogging scene. And I did the workouts for her first book, the Fed and Fit book. Where she creates a program, and I created the workouts for you. She has; what is it? How many recipes? 190?

Cassy Joy: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: 190 recipes in the book. And we’ve worked together in multiple ways. We did some travel stuff together. And we’re doing an eBook together with our friends, Lexi from Lexi’s Clean Kitchen, and Vanessa from Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind. So that’s a quick breakdown of our relationship. And you can go back and listen to that. Because today, I wanted to talk about the future of Cassy.

Cassy Joy: Ooh!

Juli Bauer: Because, here’s the thing. Because you announced it, we get to talk about it here.

Cassy Joy: Yes.

Juli Bauer: Cassy is pregnant with her first child! Cheers all around everyone! How far along are you now, Cassy?

Cassy Joy: I’ll be 21 weeks tomorrow.

Juli Bauer: Oh my gosh. So you’re over halfway.

Cassy Joy: Over halfway.

Juli Bauer: That’s bananas. How are you feeling?

Cassy Joy: I’m feeling really good. I was really; not ill sick during the first part. But I had really, really bad migraines for the first time in my life. And when those went away, Juli, I feel like I have super powers. People talk about that. They say that during your second trimester; I don’t know if it’s just because you’re swinging back from, a lot of people feel really crummy during their first trimester and then all of a sudden that goes away. But I have felt amazing. I have so much more energy to work and focus. It’s been awesome. Minus the fact that my clothes are getting tighter and tighter. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: I know. I saw you had a post the other day that you’re like, “I might have to go to maternity clothes soon.” Right?

Cassy Joy: Oh man. Yep. We’re getting close.

Juli Bauer: Pants are not buttoning soon.

Cassy Joy: Or I’m doing this trick where you take; because I’m still. The maternity pants are still baggy on me. The top part of it. It’s like this spongey fabric, and then normal jeans on the bottom. So that doesn’t work. It’s not cute. But my normal jeans, I can’t button them because there’s a baby growing right there. So what I’ve been doing is zipping it as much as I can, and then I take a hair tie, and you loop it around the button on the blue jeans, and then they stay on.

Juli Bauer: That’s genius.

Cassy Joy: Right? I was really proud of it. Apparently, it’s a common hack.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: People are probably nodding their heads all over. {laughs} But I was really proud of myself for figuring that out. You just have to make sure you wear a very long shirt, or it looks really ridiculous.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Well I feel like you hid your pregnancy for a while. Obviously, you were waiting to announce it. And you do fashion posts, so it got kind of challenging sometimes to just make sure all your clothes were baggy enough that it wasn’t obvious. And, this poor little Cassy. We’re in Austin, Texas. And we had a couple of workouts; we’re in workout clothes most of the time. And Cassy’s clothes are just tighter, and she’s at this awkward stage where she just feels chubby, and she hasn’t told anybody that she’s pregnant. So she feels that other people just thinks that she’s chubby. This poor girl was just going through that mental phase of, “I’m so happy and lucky to have a child. But I just don’t feel comfortable right now!” So how are you feeling as that stage is; you’re having more of a bump instead of a bloat?

Cassy Joy: Oh, it’s been so much better. That was so ugly. And you know, we kind of talked about it then. Because I had told you guys; you know, close friends. It messed with my mind so much. Because what my body did first when I got pregnant; before I went paleo. Before I did a lot of different things, however many years ago it was no, 7 or 8 years ago, my body changed a lot. I was a certain size, and build, and I thought that was normal. And it was fine. I looked healthy. I look healthy now. But what my body did, was I just kind of filled that original frame back out first. And it just messes with your mind, because it’s like you said. I feel so fortunate that this little baby human is growing, and we’re going to be blessed with a child, and yadda, yadda. But by golly, I just look like I’ve given up on life.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: And none of us thought that. Because we all know you’re pregnant. And I know what it would be like from an outside perspective. But it just must be so hard when you eat healthy all the time, and you work out regularly. So to feel uncomfortable, even in your workout clothes, when you’re going to the gym to get a workout on, it must be so frustrating.

Cassy Joy: It was so frustrating. And I don’t really like super tight clothes in general. And everything was fitting a little tighter. And when you’re getting a little bit bigger, you don’t want to just go buy one size larger in clothes. Because you know you’re going to outgrow that in a little bit. It was a tough phase. The first trimester, towards the end of it, was really hard mentally in that regard. But it’s gotten a lot better.

And you know, I did some research. Because I’m fascinated by, of course, the physiology and the nutrition side of it. Why am I putting on weight in this regard? And a part of it is because the body. It’s so cool how wise our bodies are, especially women. As soon as we get pregnant, we have these hormones. And it essentially does this, to put it in very layman’s terms, an assessment of, “What are your fat stores like?” What it wants you to do is be able to nurse a child.

And so it establishes a little bit more fat where it needs it, and that’s just what my body needed to do. But now I’m at the point where I stopped gaining weight wide. Laterally. {laughing}

Juli Bauer: {laughing} That lateral weight, dammit.

Cassy Joy: You know, the hips. And it started going towards the belly, which is really fun. So now it looks; definitely. My friends and mother-in-law for example were all like, “You definitely look pregnant now!” {laughing} I’m like, wo-hoo! So it’s much better.

2. Pregnancy workouts [17:35]

Juli Bauer: So what other changes have you gone through? Do your workouts feel different? How’s your energy level? What other differences. I mean, I’ve had friends who tell me that their nipples got huge and black.

Cassy Joy: Oh my gosh.

Juli Bauer: So be frank with people.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: We’re real here, Cassy. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: I love it.

Juli Bauer: Do you have black pepperoni nipples.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: They’re not quite pepperonis yet.

Juli Bauer: Ok good.

Cassy Joy: And they’re not quite black yet.

Juli Bauer: Ok. OK.

Cassy Joy: But they’re definitely larger and darker. And it has been really weird.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: I have tiny boobs, and those also grew first, and they’ve also stalled.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Cassy Joy: Since the last couple of weeks. That was the fun part of growing. When you start gaining a little weight, and you gain it in the chest, you’re like, “Wo-hoo!” {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah, for sure.

Cassy Joy: So yeah. That is definitely changed. My boobs really hurt at the beginning of pregnancy. And folks had said that, but they were really, really tender. So that happened. Since my belly has been growing out; I was telling Austin, I can’t stop touching my belly button.

Juli Bauer: Ooh.

Cassy Joy: Right?

Juli Bauer: That must be weird.

Cassy Joy: It’s super weird. Because I have an innie; right? A very average innie belly button. And at this point, it’s almost flush, you know, flat across.

Juli Bauer: Is it really?

Cassy Joy: It is. It’s a really weird feeling. And I also had a belly button ring when I was in college, and so that little itty-bitty bit of scar tissue. You don’t notice it, normally. But now that it’s all kind of stretched out, that little bit of scar tissue sticks up a little bit. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Oh yeah, I would have that too. I have that stupid scar. I feel like most females do. Damn; why did we have to get stupid piercings and tattoos?

Cassy Joy: Oh my gosh. It seemed like such a good idea.

Juli Bauer: It always does.

Cassy Joy: So there’s been that. Other than that, physically, there haven’t been a whole lot of changes. I mean, I just gained weight all over. Or at least the pear; my pear-shape filled out a little bit more.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: Really wonderful.

Juli Bauer: How have your workouts been?

Cassy Joy: Oh yeah, workouts.

Juli Bauer: Cassy does CrossFit. You still are doing CrossFit, right?

Cassy Joy: Yeah, still CrossFitting.

Juli Bauer: Ok. How are those?

Cassy Joy: You know, I, at the beginning when I first got pregnant, I was really, really dragging. My energy has gone back up. At the beginning of my first trimester, kind of before I knew and then right when I found out, I was really dragging. I’m normally; I’m not in it to win it. Juli has worked out with me a bunch. I’m never really in it to win it {laughs} but I try to keep up and do my best. And my level of effort was probably half of what it was pre-pregnancy, just because I knew I just wanted to go through the motions. And now that I have a bump, it’s different. My energy has gone back up. And since the migraines have gone away, I’m able to go workout more regularly. But since I have the bump, it just changes certain things. Like pushups, for example. I’m a very lazy pushuper.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: {laughs} I usually, I’m the person who falls onto the floor and pushes myself back up.

Juli Bauer: You’re the person I always tell the class. I’m like, “We’re not doing seal pushups. That’s not the point of pushups, ok.”

Cassy Joy: {laughs} That’s me. That’s absolutely me. Hand raise. So you can’t do that. So I’ve been doing; it’s probably actually going to be better for my pushups because I’m forced to control them.

Juli Bauer: That’s good.

Cassy Joy: So those are different. Your core workouts are a little bit different, because it’s actually advised to not do a whole lot of core intense exercises. Just because you want to help; you need your muscles. You need your core to actually relax so it doesn’t put a whole bunch of strain on that middle piece of connective tissue. Which is going to stretch anyways, but you don’t really want to make it worse. So I avoid sit ups now, and I’ll do other things. V-ups, toes to bar, things like that. I have to modify. But everything else has been great. Squats are awesome for pregnant people; work on your pelvic floor and the whole thing. It’s been a lot of fun.

And now that everybody in the gym knows, I feel like this huge weight has been lifted off. So not only are they watching me essentially take 10 hours to run a 400 {laughs}.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: And I’m coming with larger and larger pants. But they’re like, “Oh, it makes sense now!” {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Totally.

Cassy Joy: So it’s been good.

3. Pregnancy information [22:08]

Juli Bauer: So have you started reading a ton of books, or are you just going with the flow?

Cassy Joy: I’m kind of going with the flow at this point in time. You know, I’m thinking about; actually I’m not thinking about doing it, I scheduled it. I’m inviting Liz Wolfe, who is one of our friends also in the blogging community over at Real Food Liz. And she’s working on a program called Baby Making and Beyond. And she’s one of the most intelligent, prenatal and postnatal nutritionists out there. Amongst other things that she’s good at. And I was like, “Hey Liz, you want to come on my podcast for a pregnancy series? Because I have questions {laughs} I need some information.”

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Yeah. It’s a bit for selfish reasons.

Cassy Joy: Totally. So I haven’t read. I mean, I’ll read some stuff online and sift through some of the articles. I signed up for these apps that tell you how big your baby is, right? It will say 20 weeks; now your baby is the size of, what is she now? Oh gosh. A few weeks ago she was a bell pepper. I think she’s a coconut now. “Your baby is the size of a coconut.” And then they have links to all of these articles.

But I’ve found that a lot of those Baby Center websites that are geared towards expectant mothers who just want to learn as much as they can, it’s almost kind of an extremist point of view some of the things they tell you to eat and not to eat. Or to do and not to do. I mean, it is just; if you ever run across women who are pregnant and they’re just terrified to do a laundry list of things, it’s probably because of these articles. So I kind of started to take them with more and more of a grain of salt when I realized I think it’s more of a scare tactic than reality for most folks.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, I feel like being a new mom would be so much overwhelming information. I can’t imagine. Because I went to a baby shower this past weekend. And maybe I feel overwhelmed because I don’t have a baby. But they’re all talking about their different experiences, so I feel like when you become a new mom, all these moms are telling you all their experiences. And what it will be like when all these people are telling you all different things and what you’re going to experience is going to be completely different too. So I feel like it would be very overwhelming at the beginning. I guess depending on the people you’re around.

Cassy Joy: Totally, yeah. Nailed it. You know, I think about this a lot, Juli. Austin and I, if we can, we’d love to have more than one kid. And I think about this all the time. I’m really enjoying this pregnancy, right, and the newness of everything. And it’s really special and precious. But I’m also selfishly looking forward to my second pregnancy when I feel like people will stop feeling like they have to forewarn me about everything.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Yeah. People are the worst. The worst.

Cassy Joy: You know! And I know it comes from a good place. I know they have really good hearts. But at the end of the day. I think I told you. It’s just like, you know, I don’t know. There’s a lot of proactive, offensive moves when it comes to parenting and pregnancy advice that women give each other. And at the end of the day, the friends that I have the deepest respect for and how they’ve kind of talked with me, was, “You’re going to figure it out. You’re going to be great. And if you have any questions, I’m here.”

Juli Bauer: Aww! That’s awesome. That’s so nice to have those.

Cassy Joy: it is. That’s been the best. So it’s interesting.

Juli Bauer: So overwhelming. Have you had any people online think they should give you advice.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} Oh my gosh!

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: You know, I was thinking about this when I knew I was going to come and talk with you. I was like, Gosh. I really want to talk to Juli about this, but I’m afraid some of these people are going to listen to her show {laughing}.

Juli Bauer: It’s fine. I talk about everyone. {laughing}

Cassy Joy: Oh gosh. Ok, well I’ll do a generalized one.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. You don’t have to feel like Lexi. Remember when Lexi admitted something and she felt guilty for like 3 days afterwards.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} She did!

Juli Bauer: You don’t have to do that. {laughs} I won’t force you into that.

Cassy Joy: Oh that sweetheart.

Juli Bauer: She was talking about an ex-boyfriend from what, high school?

Cassy Joy: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Like he’s going to be listening to this podcast {laughing}.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} She felt so bad. She really, for hours afterwards. She was like, “Gosh, I can’t believe I said that.” {laughs}

Juli Bauer: That little sweetheart. At least she has a soul. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: She does. She has a heart of gold. A soul of gold.

Juli Bauer: A soul of gold.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} Ok. So here’s just a very brief example. I have been a little hesitant to share a whole bunch of stuff online pregnancy wise. Mostly because I don’t really want to invite a whole lot of unsolicited advice. You know?

Juli Bauer: Totally.

Cassy Joy: That’s selfish on my end, because I know people want to see things. And I want to share things. I really, really do. But I also don’t want unsolicited advice. Because it puts me in such not a good state. Because I think, “Gosh, people think I must be some sort of a dumb-dumb!”

So the other night, I post something that I thought was totally benign. I posted a picture of a pizza. A homemade pizza, and that I was going to start watching the show Call the Midwife. Have you ever seen it?

Juli Bauer: No. But I saw you post about that.

Cassy Joy: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: But I didn’t even know what it was about.

Cassy Joy: I had never seen it before, either. I was just scrolling through Netflix, and it was Call the Midwife. It had great ratings, it was a PBS show. And Austin wasn’t there. So I was like, great. This looks like a perfect just me home alone show.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Sticking with PBS. Keep it safe.

Cassy Joy: {laughing} Keep it safe. I’m not allowed to watch anything scary when he’s gone because the lights stay on all night otherwise.

Juli Bauer: And you have crazy f*cking dreams. Guys, I’ve been in bed with her while she’s had f*cking night terrors. And she’s jumped out of bed thinking there were snakes in bed, and screamed at me.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: So this b*tch can’t watch scary movies by herself. Let’s be real.

Cassy Joy: I did!

Juli Bauer: No Law and Order, no nothing.

Cassy Joy: No. I can’t. I can’t. I probably shouldn’t even watch NatGeo or Discovery Channel.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Oh yeah, definitely not. Life, nothing.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: Oh man. It is. It’s off limits. So this PBS show seemed really safe. And it was lovely. I’m, what, five episodes in. And I’m absolutely in love. But I thought it would be super fun to watch, learn about more baby things. Because I’ve never ever; I’m not the kind of person. I don’t even know if I should admit this. But I’m going to do it anyways. I’m not the kind of woman that automatically swoons over babies. I’ve never really been that person. And I’ve never really had a huge interest. People at our gym, for example. 30 babies were born last year in our gym.

Juli Bauer: Jesus! {laughs}

Cassy Joy: Isn’t that amazing?

Juli Bauer: Get your lives together, people! It’s called birth control!

Cassy Joy: {laughs} So many babies. My coach, Jeremy, got a bunch of onesies for our CrossFit gym, Elite CrossFit, and he’s like, “I got 30 of them last year, and they were all gone by November.”

Juli Bauer: That is crazy.

Cassy Joy: It was nuts. But these people bring in their kids. And I’ll go over; kids. Listen to me. It’s like these infants. I’ll go over, I’ll peek over their shoulders, and be like, “So cute!” But I don’t crumble. But all of a sudden, now that I have a baby growing in me. Like really now the switch has flipped, now that I’m pregnant. So I’m curious about baby things.

So this Call the Midwife show. Anyways. So I post about this on Instagram, and I think it’s a totally benign post about I’m going to have this pizza and I’m going to watch Call the Midwife. Because all of a sudden I’m interested in baby things. And I had people tell me that they don’t think it’s a good idea that I watch this show.

Juli Bauer: O-kay. The worst.

Cassy Joy: And I’m just like, oh my gosh. I mean, the way that they said probably had a lot to do with it. And it’s also; I’m reading it through my defensive filter. So sure, there’s that. People definitely mean the best. But I’m just kind of like; there’s this desire to police. You have the paleo police. Now there’s the pregnancy police.

Juli Bauer: Oh my god, the pregnancy police are real.

Cassy Joy: And it’s like they want to tell me… It’s real! I get a lot of questions about eggs, which are honest questions for the most part. Because I will still eat the occasional runny egg yolk. And I have a reason why, and I should probably start putting that out there.

Juli Bauer: I didn’t know you weren’t supposed to eat runny eggs.

Cassy Joy: Yeah, they’re worried that you’re going to contract any of the food borne illnesses that a non-pregnant person could contract. It would just be worse if you get it while you’re pregnant. So not totally cooked eggs, for example salmonella. There’s other things you could get; listeria. Worms. Scary things you could get through really bad sushi, right? Those things are just really bad if you’re pregnant.

Juli Bauer: Mm-hmm.

Cassy Joy: But at the end of the day, you’re probably not going to be eating a piece of sushi that you think is questionable, whether you’re pregnant or not. Right?

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Yeah. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: So. It kind of goes along those lines. Now, I’m not eating sushi, because I live in San Antonio Texas.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: {laughs} Even the best places aren’t going to be amazing. But it’s just interesting; the pregnancy policing. I don’t have a thick skin yet, but I’m working on it.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. That must be really annoying. Because the paleo police stuff is annoying enough. I can’t imagine when someone’s trying to tell you how to take care of your body and your child.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} Yes.

Juli Bauer: And then you’re going to get it when you’re a mom, and you’re going to get the mom police, probably.

Cassy Joy: I know. And that’s what I’ve heard from friends who have kids. They’re like, “Then there’s the kid police. Because there’s a million different ways to raise a kid.” And everybody who did it a certain way of course is going to be biased towards the way that they did it. Anyway. That’s just interesting. It will be an adventure.

4. The Fed and Fit Project [32:10]

Juli Bauer: Totally. Well, we’re going to get into some questions at the end, and that’s going to have some stuff related to pregnancy. I wanted to have you on today because this is going live tomorrow on September 2nd. And so your program, your Fed and Fit program just opened up for the September group. So I wanted you to talk a little bit about your program, and give people insight into that. So if they do listen to this in time on Saturday or Sunday, they can sign up for the program for September. And if they don’t, they can always sign up the next month. So will you kind of talk about just your Fed and Fit program. What it’s all about. And what you’re really trying to get through with this program to others.

Cassy Joy: Yeah, for sure. So the online Fed and Fit Project. There’s a copy of it that we put in the book. Like Juli said, she wrote the workouts for it. And it there are a couple of different versions. But the purpose of the Project is not to be another diet. Because when I finally; I was a serial dieter before I started to figure things out critically for myself. Think about what foods I should be eating, not serially what somebody had told me that I should or shouldn’t be eating. And it turned into a really long journey. But it was one that I had to figure out for myself. I had to get over that mindset of constantly wanting to diet.

So I went through that personally. Then I became a nutrition consultant. And then I started working with folks one on one. And I just saw these common themes pop up. Things that worked really, really well for just about everybody that I was working with one on one. And a lot of it had to do with just education. Knowing what’s going on in our bodies is super powerful, right?

I’m pretty sure I had a gluten-full pancake the other day, instead a gluten-free one. Because I got really sick. I’m very sensitive to wheat gluten. Not everybody is. But now that I know that about my body, I know exactly what was going on and why I got kind of sick. And it’s just so much more powerful. I also know now how to heal from that much more quickly than maybe I did before. And it also explains the headache that I got. All those different things.

So I think knowing what’s going on in our bodies, and then figuring out how to feel our best is something that isn’t necessarily always done through an out of the box diet. So the Project is meant to kind of help people get off the dieting bandwagon.

Juli Bauer: Totally.

Cassy Joy: Or get out of that yoyo, or the hamster wheel. Where you’re constantly doing this restrictive thing, and then you go off and you do your girl’s trip and you enjoy the heck out of life, and then you come back and you’re like, “Time to diet again! Diet starts Monday! Hashtag.” And so it’s just such an exhausting hamster wheel to be on.

And I think the people who join the Project are the ones who are like, “I am done. I am done just feeling like I’m a victim of food and food is either good or bad. And I don’t know what’s going on. And I don’t know what’s right for me. And I just need a little help, and I need a little grace.” So that’s what the Project does.

It has what we call the feel-good reset at the beginning, so you get down to feeling really good. And that can either take 28 days, if you want to do rip the Band-Aid off. Or three months if you prefer something more slow and gradual. Which is actually my favorite way to go. People who choose path B, the three-month long one have seen. I would say the success rate there is much higher than on path A. Because those are the folks who are really wanting to take their time. Learn what’s going on. Do changes very slowly, very gradually. It’s a really good one for somebody who has never, ever heard of paleo. Or just has major health goals to get over. Especially in certain levels.

So anyways. That’s the point of it. You work through the feel-good reset. And then after that you start testing foods. Once you feel great, then you go through this process of, “Let me figure out if white rice is right for me. Or if I should avoid coconut milk. Or if I can drink cow’s milk.” Whatever it is. You kind of are able to test those things in a really knowledgeable, empowered way versus feeling like you’re shooting blind constantly.

So that’s the food part of it. There’s a workout portion. There’s the four pillars of health, which we’ve got. Mindset, rest, hydration, food, and fitness. So we touch on all of these things. It’s really education based, but fun. And there’s never this mentality of, if you mess up on the Project then you’ve screwed it all up, you’re off the bandwagon, and you have to start again next round. That’s not the way it works.

There are so many people who work through this program. And they say, “Oh my gosh. My best friend’s daughter is getting married next weekend, what do I do? I’m on path A, and I know I’m not supposed to be eating certain things. What should I do?” And what we try to remind folks is; the food list. The scope; yeah, it’s written down as in a hard parameter. But at the end of the day, we want people to think critically about what is or isn’t right for them. And at the end of the day, going and eating the cake and drinking the champagne at the wedding is really important. Go do that! And when you get back, do certain things that are going to make you feel better quicker, and move on. You don’t have to throw the baby out with the bathwater. It’s not an on or off kind of protocol. So, that’s the Project. Did I describe it ok? I get rambly.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. No, no. I love that. So, you feel like the Project really is for anybody and everybody. Because you have different tools and different paths that people can go, right.

Cassy Joy: Yeah, exactly. If someone is really looking for. You know, people know themselves really well. There are some people out there who say, “You know what? I would rather just rip the Band-Aid off and do this thing. I want to jump in. I want an email from you every day. I want an assignment. I want to really, really go in hard.” That would be path A. And then path B is, again, a know thyself kind of person. If that overwhelms you, and if that would put you into a mindset of, this is a restrictive program and I either pass it or fail it, then go with the slower approach.

So I do think we tried to really cater to those folks. And then we also offer one on one coaching for people who need a little bit more help. And that’s really important for folks, for example, who are on a lot of medications and they would really rather work hand in hand with a certified nutrition consultant. But yeah, it is. There’s something for everybody.

And I’ve got to say, the people on the Project are the nicest. They’re like the most; they’re just the sweetest, most wonderful people. And I think it’s because we talk about all day long is just living your life, not feeling like you have to stick to a strict protocol. You just get to go out and figure out how to give yourself a break.

Juli Bauer: In the Facebook group; because you have a Facebook group people can join when they’re on the Project. And I see people share recipes, and share feedback. So it’s really kind of become a community in there, as well, right?

Cassy Joy: Yeah, exactly. Everybody is out there. They’ve got great ideas. They’re really supportive. If you’re struggling with something. For example, a common question is around week 2, they’re like, “I’m just craving something creamy,” for whatever reason. And people have really great hacks for that, and great tips. Or if somebody did just fall off the bandwagon, they feel like that for a weekend. It’s really nice to hear from other people who have recently been through the program and tell you how they got around it.

Juli Bauer: And then, how many spots do you have left for the one on one coaching? Because I know you limit that part.

Cassy Joy: We do. At this point, we’re accepting 6 slots a month. So those fill up pretty quickly. But what we’re trying to do, is if we get more interest than that. So don’t hesitate, if you think you may have missed the spot. But if we have more interest in it than that, they get first priority either the next month or we’re look at maybe opening up a couple more. It just depends on what’s out there. I’m a total pushover. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs} You totally are. But in the best way possible.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. So if somebody writes in and they’re like, “I really need this!” I’ll be like, “You’ve got it sister!” I’ll do that for you.

Juli Bauer: That’s why you’re juggling 400 things every single day. I don’t know how you do all this sh*t. Like when you’re doing your cooking videos, I’m like, “How does she even have time to get that sh*t done?” it’s crazy.

Cassy Joy: It is. I really want to zoom out so people can see what it actually looks like. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: It’s such a pain in the ass.

Cassy Joy: I’m standing. It’s such a pain! Videos are a lot of work.

Juli Bauer: So much work. I was talking to Lexi after you guys left, and it was just Lexi and I left in Austin. And she was explaining how to do these overhead videos. She was like, ok. And she put all this stuff in my Amazon cart that I needed. And she was like, “You just need this. It’s super simple. You just need this. And then once you download the video you just have to use this square thing button.” I’m like, ok. That is not simple. No. Literally, pressing send on an Instagram post is simple. But what you said is not easy.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: It would be very hard with one person. Because you usually do that with your assistant, right?

Cassy Joy: Yes. Yeah, exactly. Amber works on those with me.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, that is just so much work. So you obviously will do anything and everything and make it work for people. Which is what’s so damn cool about you.

Cassy Joy: Aww.

Juli Bauer: So tell people how they can sign up for the Project.

Cassy Joy: So to sign up for the Project is really easy. If the Project is open, you can head to and scroll down, click join, and you will be plugged in. You can choose your group. You can learn more about the different paths. And we’ll get you taken care of.

And if you miss September, we’ll close that page and it will say “The Project is currently closed.” And it will give you a countdown. But you can still sign up and reserve your spot for the next month. And we’ll send you a free eBook in the meantime. So it’s the same website,

Juli Bauer: Awesome. So if you do listen to this on the day that it comes out, on Saturday or you listen to it on Sunday, you can sign up for the September Project. I always want to say program. I’m so annoying.

Cassy Joy: it works. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs} But you can sign up until Sunday night, correct?

Cassy Joy: Yes.

Juli Bauer: And then it starts on Monday.

Cassy Joy: Yep. Starts Monday morning. We do a week of prep. So the actual food stuff. The real work doesn’t start for another week. But we like to email people for 7 days just to kind of give them a warm hug and get them started. You know, like dipping your toe into the pool first.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Yeah.

Cassy Joy: And then by the end of the week, you’re wading around in the water, and you’re like, “This isn’t so cold!”

Juli Bauer: Yeah, this isn’t so bad. I love swimming.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Ok so make sure you guys head over to that. I’ll have that information in this post as well. So you can always just click on that. Or go to to get the information, or to get the information. There are so many ways to find out the information.

5. New projects for Cassy [43:13]

Juli Bauer: So, Cassy. Other than the Project, what other stuff are you working on. Had you been trying to do more cooking videos, or more recipes. What have you been working a little bit more on recently?

Cassy Joy: Oh my gosh. Have I told people what I’m making yet, the food product?

Juli Bauer: I don’t know.

Cassy Joy: I don’t know. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: You’ve told me. Are we supposed to say that?

Cassy Joy: Juli. Do you not watch and read everything I write? {laughs} I’m just kidding.

Juli Bauer: Can I just please vent for a second how Instagram doesn’t show anything.

Cassy Joy: It’s the worst.

Juli Bauer: I almost texted you, Lexi, and Vanessa the other day because I was going through major, what the f*ck is the point of posting on social media anymore. Because no one ever sees it.

Cassy Joy: I know. It’s really heartbreaking.

Juli Bauer: It’s so weird. If you tag any company or anything; it’s just like Facebook now. Nobody can see sh*t. So I went to your website today, and you know at the bottom it has some of your recent Instagram posts. And I was like, ok. I’ve seen one out of six.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: And I’m on Instagram all f*cking day. It’s not like I’m just missing it.

Cassy Joy: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: So I don’t know if you’ve told people about this.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: But you’ve told me, individually. So if you’d like to talk about it here, feel free to.

Cassy Joy: Let’s talk about it! Yeah, I’ll tell people.

Juli Bauer: Ok.

Cassy Joy: So I’ve hinted that I’m making a food product. So that’s taking up a lot of our time right now. But we are going to make; I think I’m announcing it here. Because this feels very new.

Juli Bauer: Oh my gosh. This is so exciting.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} This is so exciting. So we’re going to take the; I needed a project. Something big to launch. And I knew I wanted to do something edible. I’ve been talking about it for a really long time. Brainstorming. Juli’s been there with a lot of my brainstorming. What we’ve decided to do is we’re going to take the four most popular casserole recipes from the Fed and Fit book, and we’re going to make them, freeze them, and have them available for home delivery.

Juli Bauer: Love it! So Cassy talked about this. About, think about those times where someone is sick, or someone just had a baby, or those times that you make food for someone. This is something you could actually send. It’s already frozen, and then they can just pop it in and make it themselves.

Cassy Joy: Exactly.

Juli Bauer: Which I think is such a cool idea! Because you know what’s the worst? F*cking cards.

Cassy Joy: I know.

Juli Bauer: Who wants a goddamn card? Nobody.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Everyone wants food.

Cassy Joy: Everyone wants food. And you want it to be healthy food, you know?

Juli Bauer: Yes! Instead of just peanut butter cups. I mean, I want peanut butter cups.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} Actually I want that too.

Juli Bauer: It’s not the best choice.

Cassy Joy: I could actually go for that right now.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Cassy Joy: Baby needs peanut butter cups. Just kidding! {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Yes! Well like one of my girlfriends, she just had back surgery like six weeks ago. And what did I do? I made two crockpot recipes for her. Because then I was like; here’s a plastic bag. You dump it all in the crockpot and you can have that. And if I had those casseroles, I’d just be like, here you go. You’ve got casseroles. So I cannot wait for those.

Cassy Joy: I’m so excited. It’s going to be so fun. It feels like something that I’m really, really supposed to do. It is an interestingly large amount of work.

Juli Bauer: Duh. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Everything you take on is a large amount of work.

Cassy Joy: {laughing} It really is. I don’t know how.

Juli Bauer: And then you always seem surprised. And then you always crush it.

Cassy Joy: I am surprised. Oh man. It’s a monster. We’re currently looking for a co-manufacturer. Anyways, I won’t go into the very hairy, boring details. But yeah. We’ve been spending a lot of time working on that. And it’s going to be under a new name. It’s not going to be Fed and Fit. We’re going to call it Joyful Foods. It will be Joyful Foods casseroles, available at and what we’re going to do is we’re going to launch with a Kickstarter this fall. So it will be available to send one offs, to friends and family. But we’re also going to have a subscription base available. So if you’re really busy in the workforce, and you just would like to have at least a few nights of dinner done once a month, you can subscribe to have a casserole delivered. Or for busy families. Things like that. So I’ve been working really hard on that.

And we’re also working hard, because I want to build in a maternity leave. When you work for yourself, there’s not like you can just tell your boss. Hey, by the way. I’ll be leaving for my maternity leave on X date.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Give me some paid vacation, b*tch. It doesn’t work like that when you work for yourself.

Cassy Joy: it doesn’t. You have to really carry that through. And I like this, but now that there’s people working within Fed and Fit, I’m responsible for them and now their paycheck. So what we’re doing is building a three-month maternity leave by just getting really ahead. So building a lot of blog content. Because I’m not going to be able to write as much when the baby; well. I want to prepare for the worst, hope for the best. Right?

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Cassy Joy: So if I’m going to have my hands really, really full, and not be able to work, I want to still have new content on the website for readers. So we’re working on that, too.

Juli Bauer: Just getting ahead of it. I think that was a question somebody actually had. Was what are you planning to do on maternity leave. So are you trying to stay up to date as you are right now? So kind of having podcasts and recipes still coming out the same speed as when you were just pregnant?

Cassy Joy: Yes. Exactly. And we’re actually going to pick it up a little bit. We just finished writing content through the end of January. And it’s going to be so much fun. But we’re going to start posting. I’m doing two recipes a week right now during the summer, and then in the fall we’re start doing three a week. In January folks can expect four recipes a week.

Juli Bauer: Girl, you are crazy!

Cassy Joy: It’s going to be so fun. January is going to be such a really fun big deal. I’m really pumped. And it’s going to be all done in advance, which is going to be really nice. And then I’ll do weekly podcasts. I’ll get a bunch of those prerecorded. The only thing that’s going to slow down will be my Facebook lives. Those recipe videos. Those will slow down a lot. But everything else; blog, podcast. And then I’ll be doing social media as I can.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Well I’m just on your website right now, kind of looking at all the stuff. You have some amazing looking stuff. You have a no-bake key lime pie going on. A chili rellano breakfast casserole. Strawberry jam and cream pops. Stop, you’re just the cutest.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: She has awesome recipes on her website. I have tried multiple recipes from Cassy’s book, and I’ve had food at her house. And she is such an amazing cook. So if you guys haven’t been to her website yet, you need to go. Because she has some legit stuff.

I’ve never watched your Facebook live, because I still refuse to be involved with Facebook in any way. {laughs} But people love those. I know people love watching that kind of stuff.

Cassy Joy: They do.

Juli Bauer: So you should check her out on that.

Cassy Joy: Thanks Juls.

Juli Bauer: You’re the best.

Cassy Joy: You are.

6. Listener questions: Preparing for pregnancy [50:07]

Juli Bauer: Ok. Let’s get to some questions. Because people have all kinds of questions. I want to start with some pregnancy ones, and then talk about other ones since we started with pregnancy. And I thought this was a really great question. Since you and I have kind of talked about your pregnancy stuff while you were trying to get pregnant in the first place. So this one is EK Mid. I don’t know. I don’t know. Whatever this person’s name is. “Did she do anything specific to prepare her body before trying to get pregnant? And how many children does she envision having? Love following you both.”

Cassy Joy: Oh, that’s sweet.

Juli Bauer: Right.

Cassy Joy: So, ok. I’ll answer the last part first. Austin definitely wants at least 2. I really like the idea of 3.

Juli Bauer: Oh, you go girl. Yeah, because you’re a three-daughter family.

Cassy Joy: I am. I am, yeah. And it’s just so fun. So anyway. Definitely would love to have more if we can. And then to get my body ready to be pregnant, the only thing that I did different. Because I eat really; I really do walk the walk in terms of keeping my plate really colorful. I think Juli and I eat very similarly. Lots of greens, lots of potatoes. Different types of proteins. Try to keep things really; I just really enjoy different healthy foods. So I eat a lot of good stuff. Stay really hydrated.

But the only thing I did as a concerted effort. Did I say that; concerted effort. Before getting pregnant was eating more fruit. And that was a tip that Liz Wolfe had given me. Man, maybe about 6 months before I knew that we might be thinking about having a kid. I think I had asked her how do I best prepare my body from this. And aside from, of course, eating chicken livers. Getting a good methylated folate store up. Whether that’s through; you can get it through chicken livers or you can get it through spinach, for example. It’s pretty high amounts bioavailable methylated folate is available there. In case you have a hard time metabolizing folate in the body. Which a lot of people do, right now. So eating those things on a pretty regular basis. But also eating lots of fruit.

So I would try to have at least one serving of fruit a day, if not two. And I had always eaten berries, but I started eating all different kinds of fruits. So I started eating more tropical fruits. I started having the occasional glass of grapefruit juice in the morning, things like that. And just the fructose really kind of helped my body, I think, I don’t know. Relax a little bit. It definitely caused me to feel a little bit softer than I was maybe a few years ago when I was really just following a more strict, I don’t know, path. It wasn’t anything I had planned. But eating a little bit more natural sugars really helped, I think, my hormones and everything balance out nicely.

7. Listener questions: Cravings and aversions [53.07]

Juli Bauer: Interesting. That’s super interesting. This one; I kind of had this question as well. So this is Amanda Marie Nelson. She says, “How does she deal with the cravings and feeing another living thing while eating paleo?” So my question is kind of, have you had any cravings, and this just ties along with her question. Have you had to eat more while feeding another human inside of you?

Cassy Joy: Good question. So I have not had a ton of cravings. I’ve had a really boring pregnancy in that regard. I haven’t had any food aversions, and I have not really had any major cravings. I will say that my body; I crave more carbs, maybe, on certain days than I did before. Or some days I’ll just be like, “Oh my gosh. I just need some fats in my diet.” Which I could definitely take it or leave it before. But it’s more macronutrient based. Not necessarily, “Oh my gosh, I need some chicken fingers and some ranch dressing.” Kind of craving. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: It sounds delicious.

Juli Bauer: That does sound delicious.

Cassy Joy: But I wasn’t going to go ham on any plate if I had found some, or anything. So I would say that I crave more carbs and more fat. Again; knowledge is power. Knowing what’s going on in the body, I know that metabolically my body knows way better what to do in this situation than I think I do. So I just try to give it what it was asking for. Whether that was a few more servings or potatoes, or another scoop of rice. Or fat-wise, another extra drizzle of whatever sauce I had. Or cooking, I put a little cheese in with my eggs. Something like that. So that has been there. And then what was the last part of the question?

Juli Bauer: Um?

Cassy Joy: That was it. Was that it?

Juli Bauer: I think so. Yeah, if you’ve had any other cravings.

Cassy Joy: Oh, feeding another human.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. If you’ve changed anything. Because you eat really healthy. So it’s not like you have to change. You’re like, “Oh, I’m taking care of something. Maybe I should change my diet.” Because you already do that.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. It really, I mean you guys. Eating the way that we do in this world and in this kind of community really helps a lot. I may be completely off base, because this is my first and only pregnancy thus far. But I have a feeling that my life has been made a lot easier because I’ve spent years eating really healthy.

Now, nutritionally what does the baby actually need? Towards the second and third trimester you only need about 300 more calories a day to build a baby.

Juli Bauer: Interesting.

Cassy Joy: Right. And so it’s really not that much. You’re not actually eating for two. You’re not doubling your caloric intake. I probably take in between 15 and 1800 calories a day. On average. Sometimes way more, sometimes it’s probably less. And so, an extra 300 calories comes pretty easily.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. God, I wonder. I’ve been thinking lately, I wonder how many calories I eat in a day. I literally couldn’t even guess.

Cassy Joy: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: It’s hard to know that kind of stuff. Ok, I think this is another great question. Oh, you know what that made me think of, while you were talking about this. I mean, eating healthy really prepared you in a better way. One of my friends had back surgery recently. She had disk replacement, and she’s 30 years old. They give you all these drugs. And pretty much tell you to walk a mile a day, because you don’t want to get blood clots or anything like that. And the crazy thing about all of that is in this whole conversation with the doctor, not once are they telling you what kind of foods to eat and why eating healthy is important.

So she wasn’t supposed to workout for 10 weeks, and she’s already back at 6 weeks. And I think eating healthy totally set her up for obviously reduced inflammation. But set her up for a faster recovery. And it’s the same thing. With a pregnancy you’re putting something, not unnatural, but your body is like, what is going on? I’ve never had this. It’s the same thing with putting a new object in a body. The body is like, what the hell is going on? But if you set it up for success, but putting the right foods inside of you, it’s crazy how much quicker you’ll be able to heal and move forward with whatever is going on with your body. It just kind of make me think of that, as you were talking about pregnancy.

Cassy Joy: Totally. Yeah. That’s so cool. Food can be your medicine; it really can.

Juli Bauer: it’s so the best. Food is the best.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

8. Listener questions: Prenatal supplements [57:41]

Juli Bauer: OK. And this is kind of off food, but helpful as well. So this one is from Moniquo24. “What prenatal or supplements is she taking while pregnant? Has she started modifying her CrossFit workouts?” And you talked a little bit about that. But what about any supplements or anything like that.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. So I started taking a year before we got pregnant. And we weren’t necessarily trying that whole time. But I wanted to have a good base. A year before we started getting pregnant. {laughs} You know what I mean.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Cassy Joy: I started taking a prenatal by a brand called Smarty Pants.

Juli Bauer: Love. I take those and I’m not trying to get pregnant, sure as hell.

Cassy Joy: They’re the best.

Juli Bauer: They’re so tasty.

Cassy Joy: And they’re so good for you! If you’re a woman of child-bearing years, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be taking a prenatal.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Hair and nails, duh!

Cassy Joy: Totally. Can’t go wrong. So yeah, I started taking that. It was the Smarty Pants prenatal. Really delicious gummy vitamins. It’s definitely sugary. It’s not a low-sugar vitamin. But I don’t have a good stomach when it comes to other vitamins, and that was the only one I was able to keep down.

Juli Bauer: Interesting.

Cassy Joy: It worked for me.

Juli Bauer: They’re so good. When I’m like, sometimes. I don’t take them regularly. I’m just bad about it. But if I’m like; I don’t want to have dessert, but I want to have something a little bit sweet. I’ll pop a couple of those at night.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} It’s so true. They’re so good. It’s candy. I take them about every afternoon at about 2-ish. For whatever reason, just when I take my vitamins. Not planned, just when it happens. And there are days. I think I may have told you this. There are days when 2 o’clock rolls around and I’m like, “Gosh. I have a sugar craving all of a sudden. {laughs} What is this?”

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Yeah.

Cassy Joy: Oh, it’s time for my vitamins. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Totally. Then you’re like, “Ok I need to cut back a little bit here.” {laughs}

Cassy Joy: Totally.

Juli Bauer: Do you take collagen?

Cassy Joy: I do, yeah.

Juli Bauer: I just started taking collagen, and seriously. I don’t take any sort of supplements. I barely take those vitamins. And I started adding collagen into my coffee every day. And I swear by it now. My hair has never been healthier, it’s never been longer. My nails grow so fast. And I was such a non-believer. But I feel like, wouldn’t it be awesome for pregnancy as well? Just extra collagen in your diet?

Cassy Joy: It is, yeah. I’m glad you brought it up, because it’s one I don’t even think about. Because Austin makes my coffee for me in the morning. {laughing} I do yeah. I put collagen in my coffee every day.

Juli Bauer: I’m so jealous of that, by the way. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: Oh, I know. He’s a honey in that regard.

Juli Bauer: He’s such a gem.

Cassy Joy: He is. They all have their things they’re great for. So I do, I put collagen in my coffee every morning. It doesn’t flavor it necessarily. I also put maple syrup in my coffee, and grass-fed cream. So. {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Oh my gosh. That sounds so good. Do you have Malk?

Cassy Joy: I’ve tried it.

Juli Bauer: I didn’t know if you had it at your store. But I’ve been adding that with coffee. Like iced coffee recently, and just some stevia and collagen. And I think it’s the best thing. It’s like drinking a shake, almost in the morning.

Cassy Joy: Oh, I want that right now.

Juli Bauer: It makes it so frothy. You should do it it’s so good.

Cassy Joy: Yum. I’m in. But yeah, collagen is really good for. You have your round ligaments, for example, expanding and moving as you go through pregnancy. And your belly is expanding and moving. So it’s really going to help with your skin elasticity, with all the ligaments to be able to just kind of go through this much more easily.

Juli Bauer: Totally. Somebody asked me recently; they were like, is it bad. She heard somewhere that you’re not supposed to take collagen when you’re pregnant. And I was like, that makes absolutely no sense.

Cassy Joy: Oh my gosh.

9. Listener questions: Permanent eating habit changes [1:01:39]

Juli Bauer: So I’m not sure where she heard that. But, ok. Now I have some questions outside of pregnancy. And I really like this question, because I’m sure you have gone through. We’ve all gone through this at some point. So this is kind of a long question, but I really like it.

Cassy Joy: Ok.

Juli Bauer: This one is from Julianana whatever I don’t know.

Cassy Joy: ` {laughs}

Juli Bauer: “How long did it take you both to finally stop eating food that you know is bad for you? Did you flip a switch and change it all at once without looking back? Or did you slowly transition into a clean eating lifestyle? I find that I eat clean and paleo very often, but when I don’t prepare for snacks or a meal and I’m stressed out or tired, I fall into the pressure and have something processed or out of my normal regimen. And my body completely rejects it. Making me sick for a few days. Every time, I feel like I’m telling myself, ‘I’m never drinking again!’ But it’s with food.”

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: So I know I have totally gone through this back in the day. I can’t speak for you. But what advice do you give her? And I can kind of chime in with mine, as well.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. Oh man.

Juli Bauer: I feel like the Project would be really awesome for that. Because that helps.

Cassy Joy: I know! {laughs}

Juli Bauer: It’s like, oh plug. But seriously. The Project would be awesome for that.

Cassy Joy: Yeah, it would be. You know that’s really kind of the idea. Is to kind of help you really feel like that stuff doesn’t have you shackled down anymore. You know, something that helped me. I’m a more gradual person. My personality is one that has to go slowly. I didn’t just give it all up at once. Well, I did. But then it felt like a diet and I yoyoed back.

Juli Bauer: Totally.

Cassy Joy: But I felt so great that I had a reason to kind of figure it out on my own and really deconstruct and build an actual lifestyle from it. And I had to do that slowly. If you go back to my old, old blog recipes when I first started in 2011, I have some recipes on there with whole wheat pasta. I had made some changes, but not a bunch of changes. I started eating more vegetables. And then I started nibbling away at refined foods.

So I think understanding what in those foods your body is reacting to may help make it less of an emotional thing. There are these gluten-free graham crackers that I really love, and my body does ok with them. But there’s an ingredient in there that I know, every time I eat it, I don’t feel awesome. So it’s not the graham crackers that are making me feel crummy. Or the fact that I did it, and I had a weak moment, and I wasn’t prepared. It doesn’t introduce those feelings of guilt into the equation. I’m like, oh it’s that ingredient. It’s that thing again.

And I think knowing those things about your body helps you feel less; it becomes less of an emotional crisis and more of one of just, oh this is what’s going on. And that is really freeing, I think. When you just have a better idea of what’s going on in the body.

So a more gradual one is what worked for me. I eventually started to give up certain things, because I realized I didn’t miss it and I didn’t need it. And I kind of gave up stuff as I started to forget about them. And that’s just kind of where I’m at. I don’t really miss a whole lot of things. And if I really want something, I take it. My husband still has; we’ll still have Dr. Pepper or Coca Cola’s around the house. And if I’m like, “I’m going to take a sip of that Coca Cola right now.” And I will. I’ll take a sip. It’s clearly not in line of my normal diet. But I don’t feel guilty about it. It’s just if I want it, I’m going to have it, and then I don’t really need it after that. I know that’s a weird answer.

Juli Bauer: No. I feel like, for me. We’ve all had those situations where we didn’t plan and then we fall onto sh*tty food, and then we feel like sh*t for however long. And the more I went through that process, the less I wanted to feel like that. And it was not worth it. So planning extra. And making sure I planned ahead all the time. It takes more work, and it takes more effort, and it takes more thought process. And people might think you’re annoying because you want to stop at the grocery store to get stuff. But not feeling like sh*t is so worth the extra time and effort it takes to put in all that little stuff.

Whenever we go on trips, I always pack food. Say we’re doing a road trip, I pack food with me. If I’m flying, I pack food with me. Because I know I don’t want to give in and get something sh*tty. So make sure to plan ahead. I think that lightbulb goes off someday that you’re like; “Ok, I don’t need that food.” And especially since I’ve planned ahead, so I really don’t have to grab that food. But finding what works for you.

It’s like, you’ll be able to have a couple of sips of coke without having the whole thing. And it doesn’t completely throw you off track. You can still enjoy those little things. But I think that planning is so, so important. It’s going to make a huge difference.

Cassy Joy: I think that’s a great answer.

Juli Bauer: It’s made a huge difference in my life. And it takes more effort, and people think you’re annoying. But who gives a f*ck? Because you don’t feel sick.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. That’s such a great answer. I will constantly carry around with me. I will prestock; even though its inconvenient, to Juli’s point. A bunch of really healthy snacks. And I carry them with me everywhere. And it is a lifesaver. Going through an airport, you have a flight delay, and you weren’t planning on eating a meal in some tiny little airport. And the only food option they have is taco something or other.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Sandwiches and those pre-packages ones that have been sitting there for like a month.

Cassy Joy: Totally. So I will eat the bars that I’ve got in my bag that I know don’t make me feel crummy. So yeah, to Juli’s point. Preparation has a huge one.

And also to your point, you also get to the point where you’re like; forget it. I’m tired of going weak in the knees when I don’t have this safety net around me, and going into the pantry and eating these things don’t make me feel crummy. Or make me feel not great. So I got to the point, however many years ago, where I was like. I’m done.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Cassy Joy: I’m done with the bad foods in my house. And I got rid of them.

Juli Bauer: Totally.

Cassy Joy: And I slowly started replacing them with healthier alternatives for snacks. But I was done. I was like, I cannot have these things around. Because if I haven’t prepared for some reason, I don’t need the temptation there. Because it’s just not worth it for me.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Yeah. I got to that point too, that I was like, I am no longer throwing my diet away on, say the weekend. And feeling 10 pounds heavier, and feeling bloated and awful come Monday. And I stopped doing that. And that planning really made a difference. So I think that’s a great question, I hope that helps her out.

Cassy Joy: Awesome.

10. Listener questions: Cassy’s bubbly personality [1:08:33]

Juli Bauer: This next question, I feel like a lot of people actually ask me this about you. And this one is Life with a Beachview. Love that Instagram name. And she asks, “Where does Cassy get all her upbeat and sunny energy?” Where does that all come from?

Cassy Joy: {laughs} I was going to say something like drugs.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. {laughs} It should.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: People always ask me. They’re like; “Is she really that bubbly in person?” I’m like, “Yeah, she really is.” I feel like we all have our little Instagram voice. Or video voice, where we’re turned on. We’re like la-la-la. It’s kind of like being on Broadway stage, and then you just have your normal conversation. How we sound right now. Just talking to a friend. But you really are almost always in a good mood. I’ve only ever seen you come down a level when you weren’t feeling your best in your clothes, and you’re just like, I’m a little frustrated. Or you’re just not feeling your best. You’re just feeling really tired or something. And then I’ll be like, “Hey, want to get some food?” And we turn the volume back up and we’re back up again. So where do you think your get your energy from? I think I know the answer.

Cassy Joy: My energy. Probably; maybe because. This is very too simple of an answer. I’m very well rested. {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Yes. How many hours of sleep do you get, usually?

Cassy Joy: between 7 and 8, sometimes more. If I’m home, and I don’t have a really strict schedule, I’ll go to bed early and just sleep until I wake up as often as I can. Sometimes that’s like 8.5, 9 hours.

Juli Bauer: Oh sh*t. That’s awesome.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. My body likes to rest. I try to stay rested. If I’m tired and dehydrated, then I’m significantly less sunny. And then honestly, working out. If I ever need an attitude adjustment, I know that I’m overdue for the gym.

Juli Bauer: Ex-actly! When people; if energy. Eat healthy food. Drink a lot of water. Sleep. And workout. Whenever I’m in a sh*tty mood. Yesterday I was in a funk because of this f*cking Instagram business and just how frustrating it can be. I went to the gym and immediately was in a better mood. Go get your workout on people. And if you don’t like your workout, go find a new workout.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} It’s so true. And that’s when you want to go the least, so I get it. I get the resistance. When you’re like, “No. I want to be grumpy.” Because misery loves company, right?

Juli Bauer: Totally.

Cassy Joy: There’s this shoulder angel that wants to tell you that it’s ok to just wallow in that misery. But just go force yourself out of the house. Go do that workout, or one that you’re going to enjoy. Pick up a healthy meal, and just muscle your way through it. You’re going to feel better.

Juli Bauer: Yes. And get off social media.

Cassy Joy: Oh, yeah.

Juli Bauer: I found myself, when I was depressed yesterday, looking at the explore food. And you look at b*tches with their ass all out. Or super fit chicks. Or this person who just looks like they have the perfect life, and you start questioning your own life even though you’re totally happy in your own life. So get off social media. Ugh. It’s the pits. It just drags you down. Unless you’re coming to our social media. Feel free to come over to us. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: {laughing} Unfollow everyone but two accounts.

11. Listener questions: Fed and Fit Project while pregnant [1:12:01]

Juli Bauer: Yes. Unfollow them all. Ok, I liked this one. Would Jamie925-blah-blah. She says, “Do you recommend doing the Fed and Fit program that you mentioned on your blog today while 4 months pregnant.”

Cassy Joy: Ooh, yeah girl. We actually have had a number of pregnant mamas and nursing mamas go through the Project. So you can absolutely go through it. I would opt for; read the two path A and path B and just kind of see where you’re coming in at. If you already nutritionally do a lot of the things that we talk about, maybe path A would work for you. But I would make sure that you have your carbs really up. Really pay attention to your body. Don’t go hungry. So make sure that you’re really feeding yourself well. Just feed yourself well with the good foods. And that will be really good for you. If anything, it will maybe make things a little easier.

And then if anyone is listening and they’re wondering about nursing mothers. We have had a lot of nursing moms go through it. Milk supply is a really high priority, and there are some things that we talk about on there that can be really beneficial. Carbs being one of them. Make sure you’re getting lots of healthy carbs and healthy fats. I feel like a broken record. Those two are really important to building babies.

Juli Bauer: For sure. For sure. But it’s true, and people don’t know that. Especially if you’re not in the food world and know the importance of food. You’re definitely not going to know that piece.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. Definitely.

12. Listener questions: Fed and Fit Project while in college [1:13:28]

Juli Bauer: And this is another question about the Project. Julia asks, “Is the Fed and Fit Project something that a college student could tackle. Both financially and meal prepping wise. I’m interested, but not sure if it’s something I can do at the moment.”

Cassy Joy: Yeah, absolutely. We have these guidelines. Gosh, what are they called. Guides built that are made to really be more of a simplistic approach versus make these five recipes a week. So if you are, say, living in a dorm room. There’s still a way to eat these healthy foods. And there’s still a way to order off of a restaurant menu. And there’s still ways to do even your dining; what do they call them? Dining bucks? On campus eating?

Juli Bauer: Oh yeah.

Cassy Joy: You know what I mean. There are still things you can apply from the Project there. And it’s a great topic. It’s definitely something you can do budget wise. You can do this thing within any budget. The testimonial we just published on the blog, actually, from a Project member. She’s been doing it for a couple of months. And granted, she’s in a different life stage than the person who asked this question. She’s married, and it’s the two of them at home. And she said that actually the Project really helped them save on groceries, funny enough. Which, paleo gets a different kind of reputation. But if you’re being strategic about the groceries you’re buying, and you’re not spending a whole lot of money on junk, it’s amazing really kind of really how the dollars change.

Juli Bauer: Totally. When I felt like, when I was in college. I just bought my groceries at Walmart when I was in college, so I saved a lot on that. And of course, I’m not buying grass-fed and grass finished. But I stopped going to bars and drinking. Stopped spending my money on drinking, and I was able to afford a CrossFit membership. Which was 115 where I was. That’s a good chunk of money when you’re in college. But simply because I stopped drinking, I was able to afford it. So I feel like when you change your priorities a little bit, you’re able to more money into the things that you’re a little more interested in, always.

Cassy Joy: Totally. Good answer Juli.

Juli Bauer: Drinking’s bad for you. You know, it just takes all your money.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} It does. You know, Austin all of a sudden wants to go out on more dates with me. {laughing} Because I’m not drinking. Because I’m now all of a sudden.

Juli Bauer: Oh, so you can drive?

Cassy Joy: Well yeah, I can drive. But I’m also a much cheaper date.

Juli Bauer: Oh. {laughing}

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Austin is a penny-pincher, guys.

Cassy Joy: He is.

Juli Bauer: Austin is the financial person in the house, there. And he’s such a penny pincher. Does he make you rewash plastic bags, like if you stored any foods in plastic bags? I’ve had a friend who did that.

Cassy Joy: He’s not that bad. That would be funny though. No.

Juli Bauer: Isn’t that terrible? My friend, her husband makes them do that. I’m like, that’s so terrible.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

13. Listener questions: Favorite dessert options [1:16:22]

Juli Bauer: Ok, I want to ask two more questions. And then I will let you go. Are you still ok with time?

Cassy Joy: Yeah, I’m good.

Juli Bauer: Ok. I like this question, because it’s related to sweets. Amanda asks, “Totally random questions. But I love to know what y’all.” She says y’all. That’s not me.

Cassy Joy: Aww.

Juli Bauer: “Like to have for dessert. I’ve been trying to really watch what I eat and cut out all the crap, but every once in a while I want a treat! Thanks so much. So what do you like to have for dessert? You’re not a huge dessert person, right?

Cassy Joy: No, I don’t make a bunch of desserts.

Juli Bauer: You’re like, I eat berries with coconut whipped cream on top.

Cassy Joy: {laughing} I don’t. Oh man, don’t think that.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: There was a time when that’s what I did. No, you know I like cold desserts. So I’ll make popsicles and I’ll have popsicles in the house. And I’ll eat something like that; or heck sometimes I’ll just buy fudge pops or something. So I like cold desserts. But one of my favorite dessert tricks. And we may have talked about this before. But I will make a big batch of brownies. I’m thinking, in Brittany Angell’s one of her more recent books, Every Last Crumb.

Juli Bauer: The best.

Cassy Joy: She had this recipe called PMS; oh they’re so good! The PMS brownies.

Juli Bauer: I actually have them on my website. I shared that recipe from her book.

Cassy Joy: Perfect! Go to

Juli Bauer: Yes.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Freaking Brittany doesn’t have her website anymore. Which is just so sad, because she had such amazing recipes.

Cassy Joy: She did. And this one is a gem. So I would make these PMS brownies. And I only wanted one brownie at a time, but I also don’t need a pan of brownies threatening to go back on my countertop. So what I would do is I would take them. I just love the freezer. I would take them, and I would wrap them up individually, in parchment paper or whatever makes you feel good. Put it in a bag. And freeze them so that they were frozen individually. And then whenever I wanted a dessert, something delicious, but not too super crazy, I’d go grab one of those and I’d defrost it. In the microwave if you’re not anti-microwave until it’s ooey and delicious. And I would eat that.

Juli Bauer: Yum. That sounds amazing. I was actually just going through your website to see what kind of desserts you’ve had on there. And these lemon curd puddings look awesome.

Cassy Joy: They’re really yummy.

Juli Bauer: So if you’re not a chocolate person, here are some lemon curd puddings on that look fantastic. Oh my gosh, they look so good. I feel like I’ve been just a dark chocolate or eating evolved coconut butter cups kind of girl lately. Instead of making much. I just haven’t been much in a baking mood. Probably because it’s still summertime. But I like having just a piece of dark chocolate, any of those. Hu Kitchen has an amazing chocolate right now. We got to try those when we were in Austin.

Cassy Joy: Mm-hmm.

Juli Bauer: They have a quinoa; if you’re ok with quinoa. They have a puffed quinoa, and it tastes like; do you remember crunch bars?

Cassy Joy: Oh my gosh, yes.

Juli Bauer: It tastes just like that. It’s so good. So those Hu Kitchen chocolate bars I feel like are my go-to. And then just last week, I was with my husband. It was Friday or Saturday night. I think we were watching; whatever night it was, it was Game of Thrones night. And I was like, “I wish we had ice cream for Game of Thrones.” But I never buy ice cream. And then I just got home from my trip to Idaho, and I open my freezer, and there’s ice cream in there.

Cassy Joy: Awww.

Juli Bauer: And, we are going to watch Guardians of the Galaxy 2 tonight, and I got these candied nuts. Candied peanuts. When I was in Idaho, I toured this little factory place. And we are going to crush those inside the ice cream. So that’s like a special trip; not obviously an every nighter type of thing. But how good does that sound? It’s like a caramel coconut ice cream.

Cassy Joy: That sounds so yummy.

Juli Bauer: With candied peanuts. Can you even?!

Cassy Joy: Ugh. I want that too.

Juli Bauer: ` Right?

Cassy Joy: I want all the things.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. You’re like, not even that much into dessert, and now Amanda has totally got us into it. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

14. Listener questions: Early morning meals [1:20:41]

Juli Bauer: I think this is a great question. This will be our last question, and then I will let you go. So this is from Ashley Lauren. She says, “I have to get up for work at 3 a.m.” Lauren, quit your job. Because that’s f*cked up.

Cassy Joy: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: She has to start work at 4 a.m. “Would you recommend eating at those times? I’m not very hungry until 7 or 8. When I do eat, I try and just eat smaller portions of what I have for lunch. But then I find I’m starving the rest of the day as soon as I eat.” Yeah, then she just says nice things. So what do you think about people who work those crazy schedules where it kind of just throws your timing off for your meals? Because that’s tough.

Cassy Joy: That’s so hard.

Juli Bauer: I remember going through that when I coached early in the morning.

Cassy Joy: Yeah, that is hard. It’s kind of like fasting while you workout, just to broaden what’s applicable here to other folks. It’s a question that comes up a lot, especially in the Project. Pre-and post-workout meals. When are they really important. And just like with working out first thing in the morning, if you can work out fasting. Meaning you didn’t eat anything after you woke up, and you went into the gym. That’s fine. If you feel fine working out, and you can push really hard and you don’t feel faint, and you have enough energy, your body is adapted. It’s fat adapted, it’s ready to do it. So it’s fine to do that.

So if you’re waking up at 3 a.m., and you’re getting to work by 4, and you’re not really hungry until 7-ish, that’s totally fine to not eat until 7-ish. You don’t actually have to consume something right when you wake up. You can. You can. If you’re feeling faint at all in the morning, or you feel like you do need something, then I would recommend eating something maybe small just to get your body started in the morning.

At 7, though, I would do your best to eat a real breakfast.

Juli Bauer: That’s what I was going to say too.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. I would do your best to eat a substantial amount of food. An actual meal. It’s going to be kind of tricky because you’re at work. But pack it the night before. Make it a real meal. Something you can easily eat at work. I don’t know what you do. But something that you can easily access. It has a good amount of protein, fat, and carb in it that will get you to lunch.

Juli Bauer: And that’s what I think. I was just trying to think of what I would do. I used to have to be at work at 4:30 when I was working at a certain gym.

Cassy Joy: Whoo!

Juli Bauer: I would have my coffee. Which kind of helped; it kind of holds you over so you don’t feel as hungry as quickly. And then I would usually have kind of a morning snack, since it was so early. So maybe a Larabar or even just half of a Larabar, just to kind of settle my stomach. And then I would have a real breakfast come 7 or 7:30, even 8 sometimes. And have my real breakfast. And then try to start a normal path of the day. And I would end up usually eating lunch earlier and dinner earlier, because my body was kind of on that schedule. But having a full meal for me was really important in the morning. And I found myself feeling much better. Instead of just kind of grazing and snacking, and then feeling starving later on. So that’s what I would recommend.

Cassy Joy: Yeah, perfect.

Juli Bauer: Cool. We’re on the same page, Cass. We’re just always on the same page.

Cassy Joy: We are. I actually secretly disagree with you on everything. {laughs} I’m just kidding.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} She’s actually a really mean person, guys. She’s not perky, and she’s really mean. So Cassy and I, we get to actually see each other next; October. Well I guess that’s next month now.

Cassy Joy: Yeah!

Juli Bauer: We get to see each other in October. Lexi from Lexi’s Clean Kitchen and Vanessa from Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind, all three of us are going out to San Antonio to visit Cassy. And we are working on our eBook that I talked about. We’re doing a seasonal eBook. And we’re all working on recipes. So we’re going to go stay with Cassy and photograph all our recipes, and kind of tablescapes, if you will, out with Cassy. So I get to see you soon! Which is wonderful.

Cassy Joy: I’m so excited! And then the week after that, we’re going to Houston together, I think.

Juli Bauer: I know.

Cassy Joy: Oh wait; maybe.

Juli Bauer: It’s like 2 days later. Wait.

Cassy Joy: Well. Houston. That might be a big question mark.

Juli Bauer: Yes. Oh my god, that’s really sad. F*ck, I didn’t even think of that.

Cassy Joy: I didn’t either.

Juli Bauer: I didn’t even think of Houston as Houston when I was thinking that. Ugh, so devastating.

Cassy Joy: Sorry. Oh man, I’m ending you on a bummer.

Juli Bauer: Balls!

Cassy Joy: I’m sorry!

Juli Bauer: I’m going to be talking about ways to give back. Speaking of; that kind of just ties into the blog. But I’ll be talking about hurricane Harvey on the blog and ways to give back to the community there, and donate your time, money, whatever you can donate. Food, goods. I mean, even as simple as socks. I’m going to be talking about that on the blog.

Because, I started hearing. I didn’t want to post on Instagram because barely anybody is seeing it. But I’m hearing more about f*cking terrible human beings who, there obviously is a hell for these types of people who are scamming people and f*cking them over. So I’m going to talk about ways to actually give back so you don’t get scammed. Because f*ck those people. I hope they drown in hell.

Cassy Joy: I know.

Juli Bauer: Is that mean? That’s mean. But it’s fine.

Cassy Joy: You know what, it’s the worst. Just like there’s gangs and looters going over Houston right now. You know, there’s ugly human nature everywhere. But there’s also beautiful human nature everywhere.

Juli Bauer: There’s so much beautiful nature. That’s what we’ll talk about. We’ll end it on that, because you’re beautiful in nature. Y’all. More so Cassy. But thank you so much for being on, Cass. I just love having you on. It’s so fun to actually talk to a human being instead of myself for an hour. So I really appreciate you being on last minute. Someone had literally just mentioned on day, they were like, “you should have Cassy back on to talk about her pregnancy!” So it was perfect timing.

Cassy Joy: Aww.

Juli Bauer: To have you on and then talk about the Project as well. So thank you!

Cassy Joy: Thank you! This is so fun. Highlight of my day. Well you stay on the line. I’m going to end this. Thanks everybody for listening. I will see you next week for another episode. Bye-bye!

Today I’m talking to one of my favorite people – the kind, caring, passionate, and hardworking Cassy from Fed and Fit. Cassy recently announced that she is pregnant with her first little babe so we are talking about body changes, […] Today I’m talking to one of my favorite people – the kind, caring, passionate, and hardworking Cassy from Fed and Fit. Cassy recently announced that she is pregnant with her first little babe so we are talking about body changes, […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:27:11
What To Look For When Starting CrossFit – Episode 48: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 26 Aug 2017 12:45:43 +0000 14 If I could get every single person out there to try CrossFit, I would be very happy. BUT not all CrossFit gyms are created equal. And it’s hard to know what to look for when you start out. So I’m […] If I could get every single person out there to try CrossFit, I would be very happy. BUT not all CrossFit gyms are created equal. And it’s hard to know what to look for when you start out. So I’m talking about how to find the perfect gym in your area, how to keep your sh*t together and not injure yourself (and end up blaming CrossFit) and how to make CrossFit work for you and your goals!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 48 Transcription!

Juli Bauer: Hello, hello. Welcome to another episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. I am here on the couch with my little puppy dog, and I’m squeezing his ‘widdle wips.’ He’s so freaking cute. He’s been a pain in my ass lately. I don’t know how people do it with children. But I still love him.

If you live in Colorado; I think this has been on national news because I keep having people sending it to me. Maybe they’re from Denver, I don’t know. I guess some woman; I don’t know if she had dementia, or she was a hoarder. Something. But she had like 25 or more French bulldogs at her house. Terrible. It was so sad. And they were incredibly malnourished. They had to euthanize a few of them. So sad. Obviously they have a ton of behavioral issues. I’m guessing this is an incestual situation, if there are 25 of them in this house. So f*cking sad.

And this happens with all kinds of different dogs. But I keep getting people sending me this message; this email. Whatever I’m trying to say. This link. Because these French bulldog; I don’t know how old they are. But these French bulldogs are going up for adoption this Saturday, when this podcast comes out. And so people are like, “Go get Jackson a brother!”

But here’s the thing. Jackson has become a real asshole. And you know, like mother like son. {grunting} Jeeze, mister. Like mother, like son. I think he can feel that I’m not a huge fan of kids, so he’s not a fan of kids. He can also sense; I don’t know. He’s just weird. He has just become weird in his older age. And he gets kind of mean around dogs; especially puppies who are all skittish and crazy. I’m like, dude you were like that like a year and a half ago. But they get so old so quickly. He’s like an old man.

So a brother or a sister is just not going to happen. Because I don’t want to work for a few months at him not hating another dog. I just don’t want to work at it. Because I’ve been traveling a ton. I have a ton of travel coming up in the next just two months. So that just wouldn’t work. It just wouldn’t work.

I know those dogs will get picked up so fast, it’s not just because I’m not getting on they’ll never be chosen. Before; my sister-in-law and I were thinking about going there and just looking at them. Which you know is always a terrible idea. Especially because she just moved into an apartment. I’m like, wouldn’t it feel nice to come home to a dog? Right? But yeah, we think it’s a bad idea. So I think we’re going to try to stay away from that, and know that they’ll get picked up in a second. It will happen, ok?

But man. It’s so sad. Dogs being malnourished; why don’t those people go to jail. Right? It’s like, if you hurt a human, you go to jail. But hurting animals is way worse. Is that f*cked up to say? I don’t care.

So, I’m very excited you guys. Because tonight I get to go to the live episode of My Favorite Murder. And if you’re not into true crime, then you’ve probably never listened to this podcast. If you don’t like murder, I wouldn’t listen to that podcast. But I’m a huge true crime person. Love it. Love listening to it. And these women are just hilarious. I love listening to them. It’s just like you’re hanging out with your girlfriends. They’re just real gems, and then they tell super f*cked up stories.

So my friend Clare, of Girls Gone WOD, asked if her other friend Joy, who is also the host of Girls Gone WOD, if we wanted to go to the live episode of My Favorite Murder. Which is downtown at some theater, that I haven’t been to in years. So we’re going to dinner before and then we get to go to the live taping. I’m so pumped about it. I would have never booked it myself, because I never buy tickets to anything really. Because I’m just lazy.

So I’m very excited. She booked it, because I just would have never done it. And I think it will be super fun. I mean, going to dinner with friends beforehand is the best. Because it includes maybe a fun cocktail. Hopefully I won’t be disappointed. I don’t know about the restaurant. I don’t know about it. I don’t know anything about it. So is it good? This conversation is stupid.

So I’m going to that tonight, which I’m pretty pumped for. Hopefully they’re a hoot. Because just last week, you guys, I went to; we have an amazing theater in Denver. If you’ve never been. Not theater, but comedy club. It’s called Comedy Works. And I think it’s very well known. Whenever I’ve heard comedians talk on different podcasts, if they ever talk about their favorite place to do their act, they always talk about Comedy Works. It’s such a cool place.

So my husband and I had date night, and we went to see Rob Schneider at Comedy Works. And you guys; I was a bit disappointed. No offense to him. Apologies ahead of time. I’m not trying to be a f*cking asshole. But he started off with just talking about politics. And the thing is, when I go to comedy for comic relief, I’m not looking to get serious about politics. And sure, make a joke about Hilary. Make a joke about Trump. Make a joke about other people. But when you just keep talking about it; I’m like, ok. I follow the news, and I still don’t know what the f*ck you’re talking about. So it’s just not funny anymore. And I just don’t want to talk about that.

And I guess, you know, it’s just me. Because everybody was laughing super hard. So I just felt like the person who didn’t know what the f*ck was going on. I don’t know what that joke is. And he kept saying how he was super famous and rich. To each their own. I was super famous and rich. Well, not really. Rich for sure. That would be a great high point. But then once you’re rich, you can’t say how rich you are. You know what I mean? So that was kind of a disappointment.

I feel like every time I go to a show at Comedy Works, I always like the intro person. The first guy to come on, who is maybe a local or kind of a nobody. Just kind of coming on to the scene. Those guys are always so fun. And this guy; I forget what his name was. It’s Chris something, but I think he’s from Denver. He was like a substitute teacher. But I was laughing so hard at his jokes. And then I never know the name, and I have to figure it out. But I want to see him more. I wish I could have listened to him for an hour. That’s what I wish I could have had. Ok?

But anyways. This was weird, guys. And I’m bringing this up just because I’ve talked about birth control so much on this podcast. So if you’re like, “I don’t care about your birth control.” Apologies. I get it. Understandable. I don’t care about your birth control either. But I’ve talked about it in previous podcasts, because I got off birth control. Long story short, our insurance got f*cked up and I was like, whatever. I’ll come off birth control. And then I was off birth control for a little bit, and I was like, hey. I 100% do not want to be pregnant. Like, if I got pregnant, I would be devastated. Devastated. Not even, ok, we can do this. I would be so devastated. So obviously, it’s not the right time to have a baby.

So I was like, ok. F this. I’m getting back on birth control. Got new insurance, went to the doctor. STD/HPV free over here. No big deal. Just so you know. That was TMI, huh? Whatever. Then she was talking to me about different birth control options. I don’t want to get an IUD. I don’t like people up there in my business. So I don’t really want a tool up there. To each their own. I have plenty of friends who love it. I have plenty of friends who have had miserable experiences on it. So it’s hard to know.

I also don’t want the little thing in your arm. I also don’t want to take birth control every day. So last but not least, a friend recommended Nuvaring. And I had never really thought about it, and she said she loved it. So I was like, well. Maybe I’ll try that out. The doctor gave me two samples. But I was like; oh, I should go pick up my birth control. Or my prescription. Because I needed to get another prescription.

So I go in. The Nuvaring for one month is inside your body for 21 days; $150. But wait, insurance covers some of it. $115. It was $115. How does that make any sense? Zero. It makes zero sense. I need to call my insurance and ask about that.

But here’s the thing. I hate dealing with insurance. If I could just not have insurance, that would be just fine with me. But my husband is like, no. We have to have insurance. You know, I get it. If you get in a crazy car accident. Which happens all the time. It’s pretty damn helpful to have insurance. But I hate it. I’ve had a crack in my windshield for over a year now. Do I need to just call insurance and get it fixed, for free? Yeah. For sure. But I don’t want to call them. Because I hate insurance.

So. Whatever. I bought the prescription. I need to figure it out. Because I’m not paying that monthly. That is bananas. I might as well just have a child! Same cost! Kind of. I obviously know a lot about kids.

Speaking of kids, my girlfriend is having a baby shower this weekend. I’m very excited for her. They have been trying for a long time. They finally got pregnant. They’re having a little boy next month. They’re so f*cking excited. Her husband has become this beautiful butterfly of excitement. It is so cute how excited her husband is. He built the furniture for his baby. He built the crib, and then he built the dresser. Legit! He built this dresser. And it looks like something you’d find in a high-end place. It’s crazy! So cool.

So her baby shower is this weekend. So her best friend, who is putting it on. She was like; “Ok. We want you to give money to my Venmo account, and then we’re going to buy her a running stroller.” Because my friend is an amazing runner. So we do that. And then she’s like; and bring a book. So me, not understanding that babies need books too. I’m like; “Ok she wants an adult book to read while she’s breastfeeding.” Doesn’t that make sense? You’re like, meh. Someone’s sucking on my teat. I’ll just read.

I was laughed at by my friends. They’re like, “No. She wants baby books, you idiot.” I was like, oh! {laughs} Why, babies don’t know what’s going on! {laughing} It’s so f*cked up. They understand, they know what’s going on. Stop getting mad at me. But I was going to bring her this new, like Girl on A Train. “This is really great to read to your newborn baby I hear. I think he’ll really love it. Maybe he’ll be into true crime too.”

So I need to get a baby book. And go to this baby shower. It’s at a brewery. I’m not sure why. Maybe she just likes breweries. I don’t think she’s a beer drinker. But in Colorado, you just go to breweries. That’s what you do. Me personally, no I don’t go. But everyone else does. People just love beer around here. I’m like, that tastes like sh*t. But whatever. Let’s go talk about babies and have beer. I’ll drink some water. Probably pack some snacks in my purse. Doesn’t sound like there will be snacks at this brewery. F*cked up.

So that’s what I have going on this weekend. And we’re going to be watching this fight. This f*cking; this annoying ass fight. The whatever it’s called. Mayweather and McGregor fight. And it’s crazy. It is c-razy that I even know that. But that’s how much it’s on commercials right now. Can you believe these guys are going to get $100 million? For this one fight. One. Oh, just one. Just one fight. And they’re playing it up like they just want to kill each other. They’re acting throughout all of this. You know they probably don’t hate each other. They’re like, “Hey let’s act like we want to rip each other’s heads off, and then everybody will watch.”

So I was like, hey, husband. Let’s have a date night on Saturday. And you know what we’re doing? We’re hanging out with friends watching the fight. What a romantic lovely Saturday night. Giving money to those two dudes who are acting. Who knows? What if the fight is like; what’s crazy about these fights is that people spend so much money to watch this fight, and then sometimes it lasts like 15 seconds. Like Ronda Rousey back in the day. Crazy.

Speaking of crazy. How crazy was that? Was it Powerball? I don’t really know all the lotto. I’ve never bought a lotto ticket. How crazy is that one woman winning that $758 million lotto. And she picked the numbers herself. How insane is that? And she’s walking away after taxes like $340 million, something along those lines. That is so insane. Man. Could you imagine getting $340 million?

You know those shows where they have how the lotto ruined my life. How do you make sure you don’t become that person? Who do you turn to for advice? How do you trust your lawyer? How do you trust anyone when you’re working your day job at the hospital, and then you have $340 million in your bank account?

And like, she quit her job right away. She called in, and was like, “I won’t be coming to work tomorrow.” But how long does it take for you to get that money? Is it right away? You get it that same week? Or is it like, “Oh no. Honey, you’re not going to get that for the next year.” And the person is like, “Oh f*ck, I already quit my day job!” I don’t know how any of those things. I’m sure she looked into that. But you never know. You never know.

Ok. Before I get into this entire topic of today, I just want to say I don’t know what’s wrong with me. But almost every single night, 90% of the time. So I did Invisalign retainers to straighten my teeth. And then after you do your Invisalign, you have retainers to keep in at night, to keep your teeth straight obviously. Well. I’ve been sleeping with them every night. But every time I wake up; I have to go to the bathroom a million times a night because I drink so much water. So I wake up, and I think it’s like 5 in the morning, so I have maybe less than an hour to sleep. So I take my retainer out, and it’s like midnight. And I do this almost every night. I take my retainer out thinking it’s 5 in the morning, and it’s actually midnight. So less of the time I’m sleeping is spent with my retainer in. It’s a real bummer. I’ve got to get that sh*t together. What is wrong with me?

But I feel like the retainer, it just feels so bulky. And I feel like I’m a mouth breathe/sleeper now. Before, no problem. Keep my mouth closed. Sleep like a little angel, I’m sure. I’m sure I’m an angel. And now I’m like {snoring}. You know? So I want to take that retainer out. Who likes to wake up with dry mouth? I’m going to have to get on that weird prescription they talk about with dry mouth. And they’re like; you’ll have mouth sores. That’s the only downside of taking this medication. Stupid medications out there.

Remember the days when prescription medications weren’t a thing? I remember when those came on, I was like, it’s so weird they’re talking about a prescription on TV. So weird.

Ok, anyway. Any who. Let’s talk about some things. Let’s talk about something that is very close to my heart. But beforehand, let me take a sip of water. I’ve got to stay hydrated. I’m not editing that out; get real.

Ok. Oh wait. I can’t really talk about it, because I haven’t been watching it thoroughly, because I’ve been so busy. But Bachelor in Paradise; the only thing I have to say about Bachelor in Paradise. The only thing; so for the people who are like, “Go to hell, Juli. Shut up!” Ok, I will. In one second. Hold your tits!

So when did Robbie become so weird? Robbie was on Jo-Jo’s season. I think he was the runner up. And obviously, he took it pretty hard. Because he is for sure a gay male. There’s no way he’s straight. And that’s cool with me; it’s just like, stop acting like you want to go on dates with women. Stop. But he; if you want some entertainment, you should look at his Instagram. It’s quite entertaining. And his teeth are so incredibly white. And he’s wearing eyeliner. And he’s filling in his beard with some sort of color. And it all weirds me out.

And they eyeliner; you know when girls kind of take off their makeup but they half-assed it. I say this doing this all the time. And then you wake up and you have black little smudges right under your eyelids? Well, below your eye. Yeah. It’s not cute. And you look very haggard when you wake up in the morning. That is how Robbie looks in every video. He has the smudged eyeliner. And all the girls are oohing and aahing over him. I’m like; what? Who wants to date a guy who wears eyeliner? Unless he’s in a punk rock band. And then still; come on man.

And if you’re going to do your eyeliner, just do it differently. Ok? Just do it differently. But it creeps me out. It’s very creepy. I hope people are with me on this. If you don’t watch Bachelor in Paradise, it’s worth watching just to see Robbie’s eyeliner. And he has the most intense spray tan of all the women there. It’s so weird. It’s so weird. And all they talk about now is rape on the show. It’s just very overwhelming.

But I haven’t been able to watch it during the week. And then it’s like 4 hours on Saturday. Who has time for 4 hours on Saturday? Not me. I have to go on a baby shower, and watch two dudes half ass fight each other. Ok, I don’t have time for 4 hours. Tough life, man.

Ok. Let’s talk about the real thing, why we’re here. Why you maybe even turned this podcast on. If you lasted this long, congratulations. You made it 20 minutes in. Let’s talk about some stuff. Let’s talk about something that’s very close to my heart, like I said before. CrossFit.

I get emails, just random emails sometimes. And it kind of gave me an idea. I was like, I should do a podcast completely about CrossFit. Because I did one about Orange Theory. Which is the other workout I do. But CrossFit literally; Parks and Rec style. Changed my life. It completely changed my life. It made me a completely different person, both physically and mentally. And I recommend it to anyone. It changes lives. I’d recommend it to anyone and everyone out there.

So I want to kind of talk about my experience with CrossFit. What you should be looking for in a CrossFit gym. Things that annoy the sh*t out of me, since I coach CrossFit and have dealt with many different athletes over the years. So I was going to talk about those.

And I got that idea from a reader. She was like, “You should talk about the things you hate that athletes do, so I never do it when I start CrossFitting.” {laughs} I was like, that’s a fun idea. Because I’m good at complaining, aren’t I? Yes. Yes I am.

So. Ok. So I started in CrossFit in, let’s see. When was it? Like late 2010. Yeah, late 2010. I had a boyfriend back in college who did CrossFit, and I tried a workout with him at first. And it had burpees in it, and I was like, no f*cking way am I doing this ever again. I did like 10 burpees, and I was like, “Oh my god what is going on? What is happening with my heart rate?” I didn’t understand how much working out could hurt until I tried a CrossFit workout. So I was like, no. Never doing this. I’m not in good shape. And he would try to help me do a pullup. And this poor guy would throw out his back trying to help me do a pullup.

So anyway. I started doing modified CrossFit on my own. So what I would do is I would go onto and I would find workouts that I could do, and I could modify myself. Because I was just working out at a gym in town during college. I sometimes worked out at the rec center, but I had my own gym membership because the gym at the rec center would be so busy. The college rec center.

So, I would find workouts that I could do. Or I could at least modify. So I’d find ones that were pushups and air squats and pullups, because I could do them on the assisted pullup machine. And I would just modify however I needed to. So I would modify pushups on my knees, and pullups on an assisted pullup bar. I would watch videos of how to properly squat. I just did a lot of YouTube searches of how to properly lift. And that’s kind of how I started to teach myself how to CrossFit, in general.

So I did that for probably 6 months, and started to see my body really change and got more confidence in myself. I was like, “Ok, I think I want to try a CrossFit gym.” I want someone to teach me movements correctly. I want to learn from an actual coach. I want to be involved with other people. Because I was working out on my own. And I wanted to get the full experience of a CrossFit gym. So I started up at a CrossFit gym, and not long after I started at that gym, I did my first competition probably 2 months later. And then I was hooked on competitions.

I competed for I think 3 years. I did two stents at regionals, at the CrossFit regionals, because they have competitions. So I did two times at that, and did a ton of different smaller competitions. So I really got wrapped up in the competition mode and getting stronger and faster and bigger and better in general.

So how I did that was, back then it was still pretty new. CrossFit wasn’t what it is today. Because this was 6 years ago; 5 or 6 years ago. None of us really knew what we were doing. There were, sure, a couple of people. But it was mostly like, for me, I’m just going to workout all the f*cking time. I’m going to lift all the time. I’m going to do met cons all the time. Which is metabolic conditioning. Which is faster paced workouts. So I was just working out two to three times a day, every day, rarely any rest days. If I took a rest day, I would run three to five miles. I was literally never resting my body. It was f*cking stupid. But, I sure as hell got bigger. I got stronger. I got faster. And I improved for sure.

So that was kind of my experience with CrossFit. I no longer compete. I don’t want to compete. I have no interest in competing whatsoever. And I don’t really push it extremely heavy like I used to. So I’m going to kind of talk through things looking back that I wish I would have done differently. And things you should look for when you’re trying to find a CrossFit gym.

So before you even look into finding a CrossFit gym, whether you’ve never worked out in your life or you’re a seasoned athlete who, maybe you’ve played sports in college or you’ve been Olympic lifting. Or whatever. Whatever. You’re a triathlete. I don’t care what you were. No matter what you are, leave your ego at the door. CrossFit is different than most sports out there, or most lifting maybe you did when in college or whenever else. So leave your ego at the door. If you think you know it better, then go start your own CrossFit gym. But leave your ego. Don’t think that you know it best.

Because you are in a class for a reason. And your coach can see what you’re doing. And people don’t have a lot of body awareness. But your coach knows what’s best. So you need to listen, you need to drop the ego, and know that you might not be the fastest. You might not be the strongest. So you just need to work on all those other little details to get better and better. So drop the ego. The ego needs to go.

I see this in women, but I more so see it in men. And maybe that’s just a woman coach telling a male what to do, that’s not always; men aren’t always a fan of that. Most men are fine with that, but I’ve definitely run across many men in my day that don’t think I know what I’m talking about at all, and don’t respect me. So don’t be that person. Leave the ego. Leave the ego. Just leave it.

So, next. You’ve got to find the CrossFit gym. So coming from my background, I live in Denver. So we have so many gyms. Some of the gym have started to close. But we have so many gyms to choose from, and new gyms keep popping up as well. So it’s pretty easy to find a gym in your area. So if you don’t like a gym, you can go to a different one. It’s pretty damn easy. It’s easy as that.

So if you’re trying to find a gym, that can be hard. It totally depends on the place you live. Maybe you only have one gym option. Maybe you have a ton of gym options. But different ways to kind of figure out if they’re a good gym. You can obviously talk to people. Ask people if they’ve been to that CrossFit gym. If they’ve heard about it. Get recommendations from your friends if they love different gyms. Or, even you could always put it out on Facebook. So you’re like; “Oh, I am moving here. Does anybody know if good CrossFit gyms?” Or, “I’m visiting here. Does anybody know about good CrossFit gyms?” People love to talk. They’ll help you out for sure.

And then if that doesn’t work, you can always look at reviews. And I always say, take reviews with a grain of salt. Because; I was just looking at our gyms reviews on Yelp. And it’s like 4-star review, because this woman is like… If you just look at that, you’re like. Ok, that’s pretty good. It’s not the best. And then I look at why it’s a 4-star and not 5, and it’s a woman who’s like, “I’ve never actually been in this gym, but I work in the neighborhood and the sleds are super loud.” So she’s rating the gym based off of nothing. This f*cking; what a dumb B.

So remember to actually look through those reviews. See what people are talking about. See what they like or dislike. And at the end of the day, it matters what you think. It doesn’t matter what other people think. I was just looking at a review; I posted a dress on the blog today. And I’m obsessed with this dress. It seriously fits like a glove, and the material is amazing. And I looked; it only had one review. And I looked, and the woman said she hated the material. And sent it back. I’m like, that’s crazy. I literally love the material. So remember you can always listen to people’s reviews, and base your opinion off of that. But at the end of the day, it’s what you think. So, remember that.

Next, when you’re looking at gyms, and you’re talking to gyms and getting a feel for trying out a class, you should always, always go to a gym that has an elements program. And they’re called different things. They’re called onramp, elements, beginner program. Whatever. You should go to a gym only if they have an elements program. And no offense to anybody who is listening, whether you own a gym or you go to a gym and they don’t have an elements program. But I think it is incredibly unsafe for a person who maybe has no experience in the gym to be coming into a class and be doing a snatch, or a clean and jerk, or a back squat, or an overhead squat, or a kettlebell swing, or a pullup. Or any of those movements without ever trying them before.

And with our gym, we have all those movements and we go through all those movements and warmup all those movements and redo them over and over. But we expect a person to have some sort of a background with at least just doing the movement once before. And nobody has to be perfect whatsoever. We see a person who’s gone through elements, and they still have a long way to go. But you should have some sort of understanding and some sort of little bit of confidence going in. And I think it is so not ok for a gym to expect a person to come in having no background or experience, and throwing them into the fire. I just think that’s not ok.

So if your gym doesn’t offer an elements or an onramp program, find a different gym. I really believe that. I just think that’s not cool. No offense to those gyms out there. But I think that’s really important. Especially now that CrossFit gyms have been so established, and there are so many different fitness options and gyms out there that these gyms know better and they should be stepping it up. So just keep that in mind when you’re looking for a gym. They should have an elements program so you can really get the basics, and get confident and comfortable before you step foot in a class. I think it’s so important, and I can’t push that enough.

So after you go through an elements program, obviously you need to go through an elements program. Because if you’re doing a snatch, you’re doing an Olympic lift that is so incredibly complicated. If you don’t know what the hell you’re doing, and you just see other people throwing weights on there, and you throw those same weights on there when you’ve never tried this movement, you’re setting yourself up for failure and your setting yourself up to get injured. And then you’re going to be the person who said, “I hurt myself and it’s all CrossFit’s fault.” When it’s not. It’s your fault for not understanding your body.

So that brings me to my next piece. Don’t be a hero. So after you’ve gone through an elements program, you’re going to jump into classes. And, depending on what kind of CrossFitter you are out there. So I’m just talking to a person who is like, “Yeah. I’m in! I love CrossFit. I want to get better. I want to do muscle ups. I want to do this. I want to do that.” Just like I was when I started CrossFit. It’s easy to get wrapped up and to see what other people are doing and to feel like you should be doing the same thing.

I don’t care if you’re an athlete and you have worked out your whole life. If you come in and you think you can do an overhead squat, and your shoulders don’t actually go to that position, and you throw 95 pounds on that barbell, sh*t’s going to get real really fast. So don’t be the hero.

If I could do anything differently, going back in CrossFit, I would stay lighter longer. Stay light in my weight, and really dial in my movement and understanding what my body was doing. So I wish I would have just taken the time to stay light. Make sure I’m feeling every muscle group that I’m supposed to when I’m lifting. So you know, when I’m setting up in a back squat, I don’t have my knees coming in, or going to my toes when I’m doing an overhead squat. Or whatever it is. I wish I would have really nailed down those movements before I put heavier weight on the bar.

And the thing about CrossFit is we see; maybe we see athletes or we see friends in class who are putting weight on the bar and you’re like, “Oh, I can totally do that.” Well, not if you haven’t trained your body to be in a certain position. CrossFit, we squat deeper. We hold positions in different ways. So you really have to dial in those movements and teach the body what it’s supposed to do before you add weight on there. And I wish I would have done that and understood that before. CrossFit was so new, that the coaches back then were like, “Yeah! F*ck yeah, put more weight on there! Do it!” Nowadays, I think coaches really dial back.

But feel free to stay lighter. And I have that all the time with people who have just started with CrossFit. I’m like, who cares about the weight today? We just want to get through this workout. Have a good workout. Have a good sweat. And feel good afterwards. You don’t have to put a crazy amount of weight on there where you can’t walk for 7 days, and then you don’t want to go back to CrossFit because you’re so uncomfortable. Remember to just take care of yourself first. So don’t be the hero; take your time. That’s totally ok to take your time. Get comfortable with the movements beforehand.

And you know, if you have one of those coaches that maybe is new, and they’re telling you to go heavier. It’s ok to say, “You know what? No, I’m going to stay lighter today. I think I just need to dial in my movement.” Whenever anyone has said that to me, I’m completely ok with that. Because I do have; especially women where I’m like, “Hey, I think you could go heavier than that.” And I’m thinking of one girl; and I have multiple women at the gym. But I’m thinking of one girl in specific. And she can always do heavier than she does. And she’s like; “You know, I just want to stay with the movement.” And I’m completely ok with that. Because I’ve been in that position and I understand that.

So don’t be afraid to speak up and say, “You know what, I think I want to go lighter and just work on this movement, because this has been challenging. Speak up so the coach knows. It’s not like you’re being lazy. Because we do have some of those. But it’s not like you’re being lazy; you just really want to get comfortable with the movement. So don’t be a hero here. Get comfortable. Get confident with your lifts. Don’t compare yourself to others. It’s one of those things. It’s so easy to compare yourself, and I did it as well. It just doesn’t make a difference. If you compare yourself to another person; why? You’re not that person. So it’s f*cking pointless right? Right.

Being scared is normal. So when I first started CrossFit; I can still picture it. I was in my first car I ever bought. My red Honda Civic, 1998 Honda Civic. And I was living in Fort Collins. I had just finished school. So I was up in Fort Collins. And I would drive to my CrossFit gym. And of course, I would get there 20 minutes early before the coach was even there, because that’s what I do in life. I’m always early to everything. It’s really f*cking annoying sometimes. Because then you’re sitting in your car doing nothing.

But I would get there early, because I was so nervous. I would pour in sweat. And literally pour. I would have huge sweat stains down my armpits before I even stepped foot in the gym. I was so nervous. Yeah, TMI. I have to go to the bathroom like 47 times. So nervous. Heart rate going a million miles a minute. So being scared is normal. Especially if you’re a person who has never worked out. Going into a CrossFit gym is so f*cking intimidating. Oh my god, it’s so intimidating.

Especially; because what you see right away, if you’ve never worked out. You see these guys who are maybe dudes who have their shirts off, and girls in booty shorts. And you see those people right away. But you don’t see any of the normal people in there. You only see what you want to see. And I’m thinking of these couple of dudes in our gym who always have their shirts off. And they’re always screaming. That’s what they see when people walk into the gym. They see these crazy dudes, and they’re’ like, “I don’t feel comfortable here.”

So understand that being scared is normal. Being intimidated is normal. And those feelings might not go away for a while. Or maybe ever. The intimidation went away for me, but being scared did not go away. We just had a workout just two days ago that I’m so f*cking sore from. But it was a workout that had a deadlift, it had a bike. The airdyne bike. And it had toes to bar. And nobody had finished the workout, and I really wanted to finish it. I did not. And I was so nervous before we started. I was like, “Oh, I’ve got to pee! I’ve got to pee!” And then you just use your pee as energy. I’m pretty sure that’s how it works.

So know that I’ve been doing CrossFit for 7 years and I still get nervous. And that’s awesome. Shouldn’t you have those feelings of nerves and scared and doing something that scares you every single day? Whatever it is? I think those feelings are awesome, because you know that you’re doing something really f*cking awesome. I know that I’m changing my body, and I’m changing my mind by doing this one workout. And that’s pretty damn sweet.

So, know that you’re going to be scared and you’re going to be intimidated. Even if you’re a veteran athlete, you’ll still have those feelings. And those feelings kind of never went away. When you know how painful a CrossFit workout can be. But being able to get through that pain, and to push through those workouts. Seriously, it makes you so much more mentally strong. It’s pretty freaking cool. It has changed my life so drastically.

So know that those feelings are ok, and you’ll get through them. And then you’ll finish that hour workout, or however long it is. CrossFit workouts aren’t an hour. But they’re still incredibly challenging. They’re not an hour. Most of our CrossFit workouts, we do a lift and then we do a met con afterwards. So in total we’ve worked out for less than 20 or 25 minutes. Which is pretty rad. So those workouts, they’re still incredibly challenging. They make you so much more mentally strong, which is pretty rad. They’ve really changed my life.

Ok, so I talked about staying light. When you’re looking for a CrossFit gym, every CrossFit gym is a separate affiliate. So they all program differently. So no gym is going to be exactly the same. So keep that in mind. What I like to see at a gym, and not everybody agrees with this. I like to see a lift and then a met con. And some gyms only do a lift, one lift that day. And other gyms will do only a met con, and some gyms do both. I prefer to see a lift and then a met con. And met con just means kind of a fast workout afterwards. So pretty much most of our days at my gym. When I say my gym, I don’t mean I own the gym. Just to make that clear. It’s just the gym I’ve been going to and coaching at for the past 6 years.

So at our gym, we believe in lifting beforehand and then doing a metabolic conditioning. And I totally understand why gyms say, “We’re only going to do a strength.” Because you should be putting it all on the floor in that one strength workout. But if you’re paying for a gym, which CrossFit gyms are expensive. If you’re paying for an expensive gym, I feel like you should be getting everything. And maybe lifting isn’t your cup of tea. Or the metabolic conditioning isn’t your cup of tea. Or maybe you’re only able to make it on a couple of strength days, and you wanted to make it on the metabolic conditioning days. I think it’s so nice when gyms have both of those things going on. So they can get a lift in, and they can get their metabolic conditioning in. Getting two birds with one stone.

Not all gyms believe in that, and that’s totally ok. This is just what I like with my own body, and preference in my own gym. And what I’ve been doing for the past 7 years. I’ve been doing a lift, and then a metabolic conditioning workout afterwards. So you have to find what works for you. If you would prefer to just lift one day, or just do a met con one day. That’s totally cool. Find a gym that does that. You’ll be able to find one; I promise you that.

So keep that in mind. The programming is going to be different at all gyms. And you might not like the programming at one doesn’t mean you won’t like the programming at another. And when I say like, you’re not going to like it. Especially if you’re a person that doesn’t like to workout that much. F*ck no you’re not going to like it. I’m not like, “Oh my god, I can’t wait to be absolutely f*cking miserable.” No. It’s all; I don’t know what I’m trying to say. Just know that all gyms program differently, and you have to find the kind of workout that challenges you and you’re getting the most bang for your buck. Because CrossFit gyms are expensive, and you deserve to get an amazing workout every time you step foot into the gym. So keep that in mind.

Ok, what else. I keep getting phone call interruptions, so I keep having to go back and forth to this podcast. It’s throwing me off, guys.

So, this is one of the things that I hear a lot. I have two things that I hear a lot. Number one; CrossFit. I hear this from people. “CrossFit made me injure myself.” Here’s the thing. CrossFit did not make you injure yourself. You injured yourself. I have been doing CrossFit for 7 years, and I’ve injured myself once. And I did not blame CrossFit. I blamed myself. Because it’s my fault. You have to listen to your body, and you have to learn what your body is telling you. And it’s hard to know that. That’s why I recommend staying light and really dialing in your movement and getting to know your body. And getting to know what feels right and what doesn’t feel right and why.

But CrossFit didn’t injure you. You did. So if you go in, and you just start throwing around a ton of weight, and you have no understanding of your body, that’s not CrossFit’s fault. That’s your fault. And yes, it’s very easy to injure yourself when you’re doing challenging movements such as a squat snatch. Very easy. But it’s not CrossFit’s fault when you hurt yourself.

So, you’ll see very; like CrossFit Games. You’ll see CrossFit Games athletes injuring themselves. Because they’re pushing their body to the max. Why would you do that? That’s what happened to me. When I was CrossFitting, I injured myself in a competition. And I’m like, what is the point of this? I’m not competing anymore. I’m done with this. So why would I go to these crazy weights and maybe injure myself when I just want to look good naked, feel good in my clothes, and get a good workout in. What’s the point in injuring myself?

So you have to understand that you are in control of your weights, and you are in control of learning your body. Listening to your body. And taking care of it. If you don’t take care of it, it’s not CrossFit’s fault. It’s not. It’s not even the gym’s fault. I heard of a friend getting sued recently at a CrossFit gym because the woman fell off the pole bar. It’s not the gym’s fault. Whatever. That sh*t pisses me off when people sue for their own stupidity. You know?

So keep that in mind. It’s not CrossFit’s fault when you injure yourself. You have to learn and listen and take care of your body. I just said that, but I’m saying it again. Because your body will often tell you what to do the more you get to know it. Maybe not at first, but the more you get to know it, it will tell you what to do. I promise you that. So keep that in mind. It’s not CrossFit’s fault.

Another thing that I hear all the time. And I’ve gone through this, so I get it. Ok. The biggest thing that women say when they come to CrossFit. “I don’t want to get bulky. And I’m scared that CrossFit is going to make me look bulky or like a ‘CrossFitter.’” And you know what this is coming from? They are looking at Instagram’s f*cking explore feed. And they’re looking at the CrossFit Games. And they’re looking at these crazy, ripped women. And to me, that is very attractive. I personally like that look. Not everybody does.

But if you’re coming in and you’re just using the 15-pound barbell, and you’re just really trying to figure out how to properly do a back squat, you don’t have to worry about getting bulky. You don’t, ok. Because these CrossFitters are snatching; these women are snatching over 200 pounds. And you’re maybe snatching a 15-pound barbell. And maybe you’re going to move up to 100 pounds at some point. Maybe you’ll even move up to 150. And still you won’t be bulky, ok? You have to keep that in mind.

So, that being said. CrossFit will change your body. Because maybe you didn’t come from a lifting background and you’re suddenly lifting. And your muscles are changing. And your muscles are growing. And your body is going to change with that. So maybe you don’t want to look muscular. I’m sure many women look at me and they don’t want to look like that. Because I’m a more muscular build. I like that look. I want to have very shapely shoulders and arms. And I want to look like I work hard in the gym. I want people to think, “Oh, she works out.” I want that. And I want to feel like I look like I work out.

Not everybody wants that, and I get that. They want a more feminine figure. “Feminine figure.” So that is totally ok. But know that you will get muscles. Because you’re lifting. And you are putting your body into positions and into different comfort levels that it’s never been. And that’s ok. So maybe your jeans that have always fit might not fit anymore because you’re growing a butt. Or your legs are changing shape. Or your jackets don’t fit. And you have to understand that’s ok. You have to be ok with it, first of all. And you have to be ok with having more muscles. You have to be comfortable with that.

That being said, there are many layers to this. Every woman is so incredibly different. And I’m sure every man is different. I just can’t relate to that as much, because I do not have a penis. But I can relate to having a vagina. I just talked about the Nuvaring for lord’s sake. So I understand that every woman’s body is so different. And I see it at the gym. I see it at how my body has changed. I see when I was competing how my body looked compared to other women. Everyone’s body is different. Everyone’s hormones are different. Everyone’s genetics are different. So your body will change differently than someone else’s.

And, how you view yourself is different than how someone else views you. So maybe you’re like, “I’m getting bigger than I feel comfortable with.” And that’s ok. Maybe your coach is like, “No, you’re not getting bigger.” And maybe you feel bigger. That’s ok for you to be like, “I want to cut back a little bit in weight.” Because I’ve done that. I’ve competed in CrossFit. I got very heavy with my weights and I pushed my body to its max. I got very inflamed and didn’t let my body recover properly. And my coach, every single day, god bless him. I had him on this podcast; the owner of CrossFit Broadway. Every day, like this past week we had deadlifts. And I chose 125. And he’s like; do you mean 145. It’s like, no, 125. He’s like, you mean 135? I was like, no 125. And then he gave up. Because he’s got to talk to other people in the class.

So I know what’s best for me, and it’s taken some time. And he wants to push me because that’s what you do as a coach, and I understand that. But I’m going to say, “No, I’m going to stay lighter. I’m cool with it.” Because I want something out of my workout, and that want doesn’t include my legs growing at this point in my life. So, know that your body will change. Know that you have to be comfortable with it. And know that it’s ok to cut back in weights. Or to push it heavier in weights. You have to find what works for you.

And a lot of times I hear people in CrossFit. They’re like, “Well CrossFit just made me bigger.” I get that. I am bigger than when I first started. Because my body has changed, and it’s more muscular. And I had to buy new clothes. And that’s just kind of how life is. But I also say, I don’t want to be 30 pounds heavier and I cut back in weights and that helped out. But you know what else helps? Diet.

So before you blame a certain kind of workout on your body change, make sure you know what your diet looks like. And don’t forget the alcohol that you’re consuming on a weekly basis. Because everyone forgets about the alcohol. They’re like, “My diet is perfect.” And I’m like, “Well you had 14 beers last night.” So your diet is not perfect. You’re just thinking about it in terms of what you’ve eaten, not drank. Keep that in mind.

So diet is so important, but know that you can change your workout. I have changed mine over time. I go lighter in weights. I no longer do muscle ups or ring dips, because I have implants and I don’t have the muscle structure that I used to have when I competed. And so it hurts now to do those movements. So I say, “ok I’m not going to do those.” My body is saying, “Hey, excuse me. You dumb b*tch. Calm your sh*t down.” So I don’t do it. I modify. And I move on with my day. Modifying is ok.

So keep that in mind. You’re ok to modify and really find your groove. But stop thinking of CrossFit as Games athletes. Because that is 1% of the CrossFit population out there. My friend’s parents do CrossFit. They are in their early 70s I believe? They’re retired. In their early 70s. They do CrossFit 6 to 7 days a week. They’re not f*cking competing. They are just working out to stay healthy. And you know what? They look better than they ever have. It’s so badass.

So when people think of CrossFit as games athletes? Yeah, no. There is a much bigger population out there of men and women doing CrossFit of all body shapes and sizes. So stop thinking of it as the 1% of the population. It’s like thinking in terms of models. Like, runway models. It’s like; why would you ever compare yourself to a runway model? Because that’s, what, less than 1% of the population? I don’t know. Something like that. Same thing with CrossFit. Stop thinking of it as what you see on TV. Because it’s not like that. Ok? Ok?

Now. I’d like to talk about some things you should not do in class when you start. Ok? Or when you’ve been an athlete there for years. Here’s the thing. Don’t be late. That being said, I understand. I live in a busy city at this point. Colorado is busy all the f*cking time, and traffic sucks. It took my husband an hour to get home, when it takes him like 20 minutes usually. It’s terrible. So I get that people are late. And I don’t give people sh*t like I used to when they’re late. Except if they come in late, and they just dilly dally around. Taking their time. Not apologizing. Be like, “I’m sorry I’m late. Traffic was sh*tty. What can I do to get warm because I’m 5 minutes late and I missed the run in the first part.”

Be polite. Because you are late, and you’re interrupting a class that’s already under way. And it’s ok that you’re late. That’s fine. But don’t be rude about it. Don’t dilly dally. Get into the warmup. Apologize, and get after it. Ok?

It’s so frustrating when someone comes in late, and is just f*cking around. And then they’re not warm when everybody else is. Because that can lead to injury, and then as I’ve just said, injury can lead to lawsuits. And it’s not my fault that you’re f*cking slow. Slow meaning late. Ok? So keep that in mind. I know I sound like a real see you next Tuesday. But man, I hate when people are late. It drives me crazy. Mostly because I’m 30 minutes early every time I get to the gym. And I’m like, why did I get here so early? Because I hate it when people are late.

Because sometimes, when people are late to Saturday morning, I’m like, Ok. You weren’t dropping your kids off. You weren’t stuck in traffic. And it’s 9 in the morning. So why are you late? Because you’re lazy. And you’re like, “I just can’t figure it out.” You can’t figure out time? You’re 30 years old. Figure it out.

Another thing that drives me crazy is when people don’t listen to the coach. {laughs} So you know, we’re about to start the workout, and they’re like, “Wait, what are we doing?” What do you mean what are we doing? We literally just talked about the workout. We went through the warmup of all the movements. And then I just repeated the workout. And you’re asking me what? What you’re doing? Ok. I’m going to smack a b*tch.

Listen. All you have to do is even half listen. Or just ask a person next to you. But just half listen. I get it. You’ve been working all day. You don’t really want to listen. I totally get it. Just pay attention for like 2 minutes while I’m talking about it. Move on. Easy.

Next. Do not fight with your coach about your weight. And I say this thinking about pretty much dudes. Mostly dudes. You don’t get that quite as much with women. And maybe women just don’t fight with me as much. But men; and I had this just last week. And I haven’t had this in a while. But it’s that whole ego thing. Came in, and could not hold position of a certain movement we were doing, and tried to put a lot on the bar. I was like, nope. Cut that weight back. I want you to start lighter. And he’s like, no. Like, what the f*ck do you mean no? That’s not how a class works, bro.

I was like, no I need you to cut back on that weight. Don’t worry, you can build up to it. But I really want you to dial in. And he’s like, no. {laughs} I was about to lose my sh*t on him. If he would have gone much longer, I would have been like, “get out of my class. Get out.”

But your coach knows best. And listen to them. So, if your coach is telling you to go lighter because you are not keeping proper position, and you need to work on a movement, and you need to get better at this or that; listen to them. Do not fight with them. Listen to them.

So this dude, who wanted to go crazy heavy in a squat clean when he couldn’t hold position, did a lighter wall ball and kettlebell than me in the workout. I’m like, “This is why I’m telling you to go lighter.” It’s very frustrating. Very annoying. Don’t be that person. And I know I said it’s ok to speak up if you want to go lighter; but listen to your coach. Your coach is there to keep you safe and to push you. So it’s finding that balance, and finding that relationship with that coach. But listen to them.

I have seen numerous men, and women, not know what they’re doing. And you’ve got to remember that it’s ok to not be the hero that day. It’s ok that dudes are going heavier than you. Or women are going heavier than you. So listen.

Last but not least, don’t be a cheat! Oh my god. It’s just so funny to me when people cheat their reps in classes. And they think nobody knows or nobody notices. Everybody knows that you’re the cheater, and everybody talks about you! They’re like; “That person cheats all the time. I don’t give a sh*t what their weights are. Or their score is, because they’re cheaters!” So remember that. That everyone knows you’re a cheater, if you cheat your reps. Everyone sees it. The coach counts your reps, and they’ll probably talk to you at some point. I’ve talked to a handful of dudes. I’m like, dude. You were doing 13 reps instead of 20. Can you not count to 20? My dog can count to 20, you can’t? We see it. We see it.

And it’s frustrating; I’ve totally seen my husband where he’s like, “Yeah I did 8 reps instead of 10.” My husband is not coming in first. He’s not doing prescribed weights, when he was doing CrossFit. He didn’t give a sh*t. If you’re one of those people, do you. But if you are coming in and you’re like, “I got the top score.” We all see through you. Nobody likes a cheat. It’s kind of like nobody likes a snitch in jail. We won’t jump you and murder you, but we won’t like you. Ok? We’ll judge you for sure. No murder, but judging.

Those are the things that annoy me. That’s not that bad. That’s not that many. But. If I could make everyone try CrossFit, I totally would. It’s the best thing that ever happened to me. I really mean that. It changed my life. It changed my future. It changed my; I mean, it changed everything in my life. And I wish more people could experience it and really experience what a life changing thing it can be. It’s so f*cking cool.

I’ve never been more confident. I’ve never been more comfortable in my skin. I can push myself in the gym. I can push myself mentally and physically harder because of my CrossFit workouts. It’s amazing. And I think everybody should try it. But not all gyms are totally the same. Keep that in mind. And before I found my CrossFit gym, I worked at and worked out at probably 5 or 6 other CrossFit gyms before I found the gym that I’ve been at for 5 or 6 years. So keep that in mind that it took me many gyms to find the one that worked for me. And I hope that you have multiple options in your neighborhood. If you don’t, I hope your gym is amazing.

Because just recently, I went to CrossFit Santa Ynez, and I think that’s the only CrossFit gym. I know it’s the only CrossFit gym, because it’s the tiniest little town, or community I guess. And it was amazing. So just know that you can have amazing gyms when there’s even just one option. Keep that in mind.

Ok. I’ve got to get going because I’ve got to shower and get ready for this live episode of My Favorite Murder. Yeah. I’ve got to go. So I hope you have a wonderful weekend. I’ll be back next week talking about my trip to Idaho. Boise. Because I’m going to Boise soon. I’ll talk to you about that experience. I’ve heard mixed reviews about Boise. I’ve heard it’s really amazing; it’s kind of like Denver. And then other people say it sucks. But I’m sure people say that about Denver, and I think Denver is amazing. So I can’t wait to tell you what I think. My personal correct experience. Know what I mean? I get to go paddle boarding. I mean, how could it be bad?

Ok. I love you long time. Keep being awesome. Get your ass in the gym. Push yourself. Be a badass. Be better than yesterday, ok? I know that’s so cliché and f*cking annoying, but be better than yesterday because who wants to be your yesterday self? We’re working towards the future, right? Be your future self every day.

Ok. That’s all I have to say for now. If you have any questions about CrossFit, or experiences, or what to look for, or whatever. Feel free to message me. Know that you will be sore. And that’s normal. I was very sore for many months, and I still get sore. I was just saying how sore I am. Soreness is normal.

Keep it light, keep it tight when you’re learning. I always say keep it light, keep it tight when I’m going lighter than what my coach says, and it annoys the f*ck out of him. That’s why I continue to say it. It’s the best!

Ok. Talk to you soon. Love you long time. Bye-bye!

If I could get every single person out there to try CrossFit, I would be very happy. BUT not all CrossFit gyms are created equal. And it’s hard to know what to look for when you start out. So I’m […] If I could get every single person out there to try CrossFit, I would be very happy. BUT not all CrossFit gyms are created equal. And it’s hard to know what to look for when you start out. So I’m […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes
Sailing Through The Caribbean – Episode 47: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 19 Aug 2017 13:12:51 +0000 2 Talking about my recent trip to the Caribbean! Where we traveled, who we sailed with, what we did, ate, drank and everything in between! ____________ Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you […] Talking about my recent trip to the Caribbean! Where we traveled, who we sailed with, what we did, ate, drank and everything in between!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 47 Transcription!

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: Well hello, guys. Welcome back to another episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. Today I believe is the 47th episode. I think that’s it. I don’t know why I don’t ever freaking look at it. But today is the 47th. We’re going to go with that. I missed a week last week because I was in the Caribbean on vacation. Sorry, Jackson is digging through his bone, so if you can hear those loud noises. Oh thanks. Hi. Thanks.

So I was in the Caribbean last week. Full on vacation mode. Not giving a F. So there was no podcast going down. There was no recording of podcast before I even left. There was just no time. Vacation had begun, and it went, and it was awesome. So today I’m going to talk about that trip. Because it was the best freaking trip ever.

But before I get into that. I’m back in Colorado for a hot second. I go to Boise, Idaho at the end of this month for a few days. I’ve never been to Boise. I don’t really know what to expect other than it’s probably like Colorado. So it’s outdoorsy. There’s mountains. There’s people driving Subaru’s, wearing five-fingers. So I expect it to be just like Colorado. Yes, five-fingers are still a thing. I’m not sure how they haven’t all been burned. But I still see them.

Thank god the CrossFit world kind of let that go a little bit. Because it’s hard to coach someone and take them seriously when they’re wearing five-fingers. If you’re a person who wears them, yes I’m judging you. They’re just hideous shoes. I don’t’ care if you’re more in tune with the earth and your body. You look hideous, ok? You can say the same thing about anything I wear. That’s fine. But I’m going to punch you right back if you’re wearing five-fingers.

So, what the hell is that tangent? So I’m back in Colorado for a hot second. Back to hanging out with my husband, because he was not able to attend the Caribbean. Think about how much he regretted that decision. He works a sh*t ton, and he can’t expect other people. He wouldn’t let someone else take that much time off, so he can’t take that much time off. If that makes sense. So yeah. 9 days was just not doable for him. Which was a major bummer. But luckily, my sister-in-law went with us. With me, and the group that I was with.

So now I’m back to hanging out with my husband. And I missed the sh*t out of him. And he’s just so rad and so cool. But this week is all about reconnecting. Because I feel like if you do not reconnect with your spouse. Especially if you travel all the time, which I do nowadays, you can easily become just your roommate with your lover. And I’d like to not be just roommates. I’d like to be in a relationship with my husband.

So this weekend, we’re going to go on a sushi date night, and go to Comedy Works. And just hang out. Reconnect. Be best friends, but not like best friends. Because I hate when people call their husband or wife their best friend. What happened to your best friend before you met that husband or wife? Did they just get forgotten about?

Anyway. We’ve been watching Game of Thrones. We had to catch up on two episodes. I’m really bummed that Khaleesi and Jon Snow are related, because I’d like them to become lovers. If you don’t watch Game of Thrones, what are you doing? It’s like not watching the Bachelor. Don’t think you’re too good for this TV show. Game of Thrones is everything. Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise is kind of everything. But on the annoying side.

I haven’t even watched the Bachelor finale. Or Bachelor in Paradise premier. I’ve had no time! Because the thing is, when you leave for 9 days and you come back into town, you can’t be like, “Hey deuces husband, I’m going in the basement to watch 16 hours of a show that you despise. Cool? You want to be best friends? You want to be buds, bro?” No. Not going to work in a relationship. In a good relationship, I should say. So we’ve been bonding over Game of Thrones instead.

But my goal, tonight. Excuse me. I just had some dairy, and now I’m phlegmy. Just a little information for you as I clear my throat 46 times. That’s what I get for having dairy, ok?

I didn’t finish my coffee earlier. What the hell.

Ok. I keep doing these tangents and keep forgetting about what I’m talking about. Oh. So my husband; he won some glow in the dark golf. And while I was traveling, his work has been stupid stressful. I’ve told him to quit 4 million times because it’s so sad seeing him stressed the f*ck out all the time. But he refuses. He went to a doctor, talked to a doctor about dealing with some stomach issues he was having. And all those stomach issues are purely from stress; 100%. And of course, what does the doctor want to do? Put him on anti-anxiety medication. You’re like, “So the side effects are you’re super constipated.” Oh, ok doc. Way to solve my issue, you f*cking ass.

So, he’s like not going on that, thank gosh. I’m not getting him on those kinds of drugs. So he’s just trying to deal with stress in just a healthy way. Not bringing it home. Getting a hobby. Doing other things. Getting his mind off of it. So he’s taken on golf. Golf is his new thing. Because one of his best friends from high school and college, him and his family have to move a lot because of work. And they lived in Colorado before; they just moved back to Colorado. And he’s a huge golfer. Loves to go play golf. So it’s like the perfect way to hang out with his friend, and then cool off from stress whenever he can.

So anyway, he is golfing more often. And he golfed a ton while I was out of town. So he won this glow in the dark golf tonight. So I have the house all to myself. So I might have to watch Bachelor in Paradise. Or the Bachelor finale. I don’t know. Golf takes like 2 hours, the one he’s playing. And Bachelor takes 18. It’s really hard to get through it. Especially when it’s the most boring season of all time. I thought Nick’s season was boring. Rachel’s was just as bad. But whatever. Hopefully I can talk about it someday. The people who don’t give a sh*t, they don’t care. But hopefully I can talk about the finale at some point. I know what happens anyway. I know Bryan gets picked; don’t care.

So, that’s what I have going on this weekend. Trying to get back to normal life. Getting some recipes done. Building a relationship with my husband. My sister-in-law just moved into a new apartment, so we’re moving her. And moving sucks. So if there are any hot dudes out there that are single, successful, and not f*cking psycho, you can totally date my sister-in-law. You have to be in your 30s. You can totally date my sister-in-law and help her move. That would be fantastic. Ok? All these dudes. All these dudes are f*cking crazy. Or like 23. Why is everybody so young and cray-cray?

Ok. So I want to talk about this trip. I did a full blog post about this. So if you miss any of these details, you can always go to my blog. But, talking about the trip is so much easier than typing it all down, because then I’m like; ok, this is post is so f*cking long. I feel like I should cut it down. Talk less about this. So here I can actually talk about all the details of the trip completely, and things I would do differently next time. The pros and cons, that sort of stuff.

So. Background. My friend Vanessa of the website Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind, we’ve been friends for years now through the interwebz, and we’ve hung out many times. We went on book tour together. She’s awesome. I could not travel across the country with anyone else. Her and I just get each other. If we get annoyed, that annoyance goes away in two seconds. She’s just so f*cking cool. We just get each other. We’re just on the same wavelength, you know? You have all those friends, many of which you don’t get on that same wavelength. She and I get it.

So anyways. She had this trip last year through the Caribbean. I think she went to St. Thomas, and St. Vincent. And she was on this boating trip. I just saw her photos and videos, and I was like, oh my god that looks so f*cking cool. Blah, blah, blah. So while they were on this boat last year, they booked another trip for the next year. Because when you book it when you’re in international waters you don’t have to pay taxes or some money saving deals like that. So this one person of the group put it on their credit card, booked the whole trip, and everybody else paid him individually for the 5 cabins total.

So. It gets closer to the date. A couple that was on their trip, they broke up and backed out of the trip. So they were looking for someone to fill it. Well, Vanessa is a gem and she asked me. Because I love her so much. And it’s funny because I’m friends were like, “Who is fun to get drunk and party on a boat with?” So I don’t know why she chose me. Because I’m not very good at drinking. But she did. I got to go.

So of course I book it. And ask my husband. He can’t go. Ask my sister-in-law. She can go. And we made it work. So we fly out to St. Martin and we drive 30 minutes outside of the hotel to the Westin. We stayed at the Westin in St. Martin for the first night. And then for the last night of the trip. And it’s just a good idea to get in a day early if you can. Just because, obviously, flights get canceled or changed. Especially if you’re in winter and it’s just kind of craziness going on.

So our flight was totally fine. Nothing changed. But you never know what could happen. So it’s good to get there a day early so you don’t miss the first night on the boat and leaving. I think they come back to get you if you miss the first night. But that sucks, right? You paid for it.

So we go to the Westin. My friend Vanessa gets married. She is now married. She got married, and this poor girl. She has the ceremony, and it was just a total sh*t show. She just wanted her husband and they needed two witnesses. So it was me and her friend Rhonda was the other witness. So we literally just drove into the hotel. Hung out for a second. And then she got ready and we went to the beach. Her florist didn’t show up. So she didn’t have her flowers that she had ordered. The priest was just a f*cking sh*t show. Pastor; I don’t know. I don’t know the difference. But whoever he was, he was a hot mess. The ordained; I don’t know.

Jackson, come over here so I can scratch you.

So this guy is just a sh*t show. He asked all of our names, and then during the ceremony, he was looking at Brad, Vanessa’s now husband, and he goes. “Julian.” Speaking to him. He’s like, “My name is not Julian.” Because, hey guys. My name is Julian. That’s my birth name. I don’t know. My OG name. So, all other females; who did he think was Brad? What the f*ck? So he kept messing up everybody’s name. He was taking forever. And then the photographer was terrible. It was just a sh*t show. Poor Vanessa.

But we went to a really nice dinner afterwards, at the hotel. Highly recommend this hotel. It has the friendliest staff I’ve ever been around. People always say that people in Jamaica are friendly, when we went to Jamaica. I found the people in the Caribbean so much; well, where we were in the Caribbean, so much nicer. Even the little French town. The nicest.

So, anyway. The wedding wasn’t the best. But I told her; I was like, who cares. Honestly, some people wedding days are a huge deal. But it is really not that big a deal. Because there are so many years after your wedding day. And you could save all that money for those years. Think about that wedding, however much it costs, depending on what you do. That is so much money you could put into a house, or savings, or retirement. You know? But whatever.

So the next day we kind of hang out at the hotel. Because you don’t ship out, or sail out, until 5 p.m. So we kind of hung out at the hotel. And then we went to town to get a drink and meet up with everybody else. So there were 10 people total on the boat. And I didn’t know anybody else other than my sister-in-law, Vanessa, and I had met Vanessa’s husband before, so I knew him. But I didn’t know the rest of the group. So we all met up, had a drink, hung out. And then we went onto our boat.

So the company is called Trade Winds. I had never heard about this company before I stepped foot on this boat. Because we had kind of come in last minute and we weren’t part of the group to begin with, we weren’t sent the itinerary. We didn’t really know anything about this trip whatsoever. So we kind of were completely in the dark about it. And I’d never heard about Trade Winds until I saw it on the side of the boat. Or, I guess signed my life away in the; what is it called? Waiver. God, Jesus. {laughs} When I signed my life away with the waiver.

So you get there. You have already paid your cabin fee, because you have to pay it to book the trip. And then you pay; just so you know, our cabin fee was $1800. I believe it was $1800. Or maybe it was 17-something. Whatever. We paid about $900 per person. For that cabin; it was about $900 per person. And then the all-inclusive fee is $995. So you pay that right before you get on, and that all-inclusive covers all your food and drink for the trip. So we get on the boat. On the boat you have 5 different rooms; 5 different cabins. And you meet the first mate and the captain.

So our captain was named Jordan. I called him Jordy the whole time. He was this adorable 24-year-old kid. But is like so grown up at the same time. You can see his younger attributes at time when he would loosen up a little bit. But he’s manning this boat that has 10 drunk people on it, and making sure you don’t die in the ocean and sail into a storm and really die. So he’s an old soul in a way.

So we had Jordan, and we had Ryan as the first mate. And Ryan made all the meals. Jordan helped out with a lot of them, too. But Ryan made all the meals, then helped out with other boat stuff. He just doesn’t have his captain license quite yet.

So we get on, meet them. We set sail. First we went to; where did we go. I think we just hung out. I think we were just in Marigot Bay. Where all the boats are, there. So we just have dinner there. We watch the sunset. We hang out. It’s just gemmy. It’s just great.

So Trade Winds, if you’ve never heard about. I’d never heard about. And still, I don’t know all the information out there because I just came on last minute. So this is just me learning on the boat and then kind of reading on their website after the fact, so I could talk about it in a blog post and it would make sense. But on Trade Winds, they have 3 different kinds of boats. They have flagship class, cruising, and luxury class. And we were on the cruising class. I think that’s the cheapest of the boats. Every different boat has different stuff. One has a paddleboard. One serves nicer food than the other and has higher end alcohol, that sort of thing.

So we get on our cruising class, and the cabins are all pretty decent sized. Everybody; the people who booked the trip. They got to pick their room first, and then it was kind of down from there. So obviously we were the last pick. And I think we got a sweet room. I saw somebody else’s room, and I’m like, how did we get that room? Because Carra and I, my sister-in-law and I, we could be in that room and both be getting ready and still comfortable. It’s not like only one person could be in there. And it has a shower, and a bathroom, and sink, and a bed, and then it had a big drawer. So Carra used a drawer and I used the closet. So we had a ton of space to store everything. Nothing felt too cluttered. They took our suitcase after we unpacked everything so they could put the suitcase in the marina so it would feel more comfortable inside.

So we get our rooms. And with Trade Winds, you can either book a room on a boat. So I could come in, if a room was available, I could come in with a group of completely random people and book this one room. Or you can book the entire boat, and just kind of “rent it out” to your friends. Your friends can just pay you back doing that. So you can always do the whole boat, or you can just do a cabin. It is totally up to you. And they have those different offers.

And they sail all over the place. They go; and these are just off the top of my head. They go to the BVI; the British Virgin Islands. They go to French Polynesia. They go to Greece. I’m forgetting where else. They have a ton of different places that they go to. This was just one of their Caribbean stops that we were able to go through.

So I know they have a membership as well. I don’t know a ton about the membership, and I did see that as much information online. I think because the membership, they maybe do in open water so you don’t have to pay taxes on it. I think that’s the case, but don’t quote me on that. Am I going to get sued for that? I have no idea. So this is just totally based on my experience. And then as soon as I got back, I went to the Trade Winds website and I started looking at future trips. What’s it going to cost. And you can go to their website, and you can see, oh you can book the luxury class for French Polynesia for this much. And then you can click what’s the cruising class look like, and you can pick cruising instead, and see what that price is. So you can really pick it to your needs and price point, kind of.

So anyway. We got on this boat. We hang out in the bay. We just kind of get to know each other. Get our little drink on. And in the 7 days, we went to 12 stops. So. Let’s give a little breakdown. I’m pulling it up so I don’t miss any. We did Marigot Bay, Creole Rock, Colombier Bay, Gustavia, Ile Fourchue, Grand Case; Jordan said I’m such an American when I said “grand case.” Whatever. Dog Island, Road Bay, Sandy Island, Prickly Pear Island, Meads Bay, and Rendezvous Bay. So we went to all these different Bays and Islands and areas. So cute.

So, I’m going to go through all the different stops, and then I’ll kind of do the pros and cons about the trip. So we started in Marigot Bay. And that’s, I think, really close to the airport. So that’s where you hop in the marina. There’s a ton of different shops and restaurants around town. We kind of wandered that the last night. We actually wandered into this piano bar when we were looking for an ATM and got lost. We wandered into this piano bar, and nobody was in there yet because it was like 8 p.m. And I was having a grumpy day. I’ll explain later.

I was having a grumpy day. And the server, the bartender. I was like, I need a strong drink; no sugary drink. So I got an extra-dirty martini. And I’m like; I cannot listen to piano music. Because the piano player wasn’t there yet. And I was like; I need some dance. I need you to pick me up. His name was Luke. I was like, Luke. Pick me up. Put me on your shoulders, Luke. Because he was very attractive, as well. I’m like, pick me up, carry me away. So he turned on dance music, made me the best dirty martini. I was on the floor drunk because I was buzzed before. He just really lifted my spirits.

But that piano bar was so cool. I loved that spot. I have no idea what it’s called other than piano bar. But if you’re in St. Martin, look it up. Go find Luke. Stare at him because he’s beautiful. He lives on a boat with his wife and children. He’s so cute. I just love handsome men. They’re just so nice to look at.

So next after Marigot Bay, we go to Creole Rock. So Creole Rock has amazing snorkeling, and you can see a ton of different fish and sting rays and stuff that freaks me the f*ck out when I’m swimming next to it. So I did not partake in the snorkeling, I just did the floating. I know snorkeling is really cool. I know scuba diving is really cool. And I’m just not into it, ok. I’ve tried, it freaks me out. Cool? Ok.

Next we moved to Colombier Bay. And this was one of my favorite stops on the whole trip. I loved this bay. I think we were there; we were there for a full night. Like, full day and full night, I think. And the bay is super secluded. So there are only maybe three other boats, if that, there. And when we were on the beach, maybe two other people on the beach. Maybe up to four. It was a super secluded beach. You can walk the whole beach, but then you can also take a trail up, and it goes into St. Bart’s. So you can take this trail pretty much to down. We didn’t take it all the way into this sleepy looking little down. Just because it was getting dark outside and we didn’t know, really, where we were going. But we just kept taking this trail.

And this trail was kind of mountainy, but it had these stairs leading up. It was just stunning. Because it overlooks the ocean, of course. Like everything. It was so stunning. And the trail was littered with turtles. Turtles everywhere. And goats. There were all these baby goats that were f*cking so cute! And then lizards, and just all kinds of creatures everywhere you turned. We almost stepped on turtles multiple times, there were so many. So we did that trail, and it was stunning. It was so pretty.

We also had this dude who was running the trail. So it’s this big, black, beautiful man just glistening. Has a 14-pack. But he was wearing those spandex pants. Like, full black pants. And it’s like 90 degrees, humidity 150%, and he’s running in pants. And every time he’d run by, he’d kind of move his hand, like, “move the f*ck out of the way b*tches.” Oh, sorry, I’m looking at the turtles, you douche. So he’d be like, get out of the way, so we’d get out of the way. And his sweat would splatter upon me. Like he’s sweating so much. Can you imagine how stinky down under is? I can’t. I can’t. But he was really nice to look at. He ran past us like 46 times, back and forth. We were like; we get it. You’re fast. We get it. Ok.

So yeah. I loved Colombier Bay. If you can go there, it’s so cute. And at the end of this trail, we could see it went into town, and there was almost a little swimming hole. These rocks had built around it, and the water kind of stayed more calm right there, and it was like this little swimming area. But we didn’t want to go because we didn’t want to get stuck in the dark. Because it was getting dark pretty fast. But so cute.

And then next we went to Gustavia. A lot went down in Gustavia. So this was the first spot I could get Wi-Fi. Which was a big deal. I was like, ok I need to find a coffee shop. I need to get work done. Because life does not stop when you run your own business. So I had to get to some Wi-Fi. Took my computer with me, and just started wandering. Looking for a coffee shop. And I ran into this place called Tom’s Juice Bar. Obsessed. This was the cutest little juice bar. It was like upstairs in this little villa type place. And it had, when I walk in. Just imagine a cute little juice bar. But it has all these homemade drinks. But then it has homemade treats. And then it had my favorite granola. It had Purely Elizabeth granola, which was started in Boulder, Colorado. So that was pretty rad. Because this is in St. Barts, still.

So we get these little cacao cold-brew coffee juice type things. So delicious. So pissed we didn’t get larges. That was our biggest regret for a long time. Especially when we were drunk, and going on and on about how we wished we would have ordered larges. So we had that. I got some work done. And then we go to a place called Bo Kao. I have no idea if I’m saying it correctly. But it was; maybe a Thai. I don’t know. They had ceviche that was fantastic. No; oh my gosh, it was like a Peruvian restaurant. That’s what it was. It was Peruvian. A Peruvian-Asian mix, I believe. No, I’m serious though. It was Peruvian. So I had this aji, I believe it was aji. It’s Peruvian yellow pepper paste. I don’t know how to say anything. God I suck on this podcast. But it was that with coconut and mahi-mahi. And it was so freaking good.

So as we’re doing this; having some lunch. Because we just decided to have lunch, because we didn’t know where everybody else was. Because everybody else came ashore. You don’t really have; none of us knew if our cellphones would work. I have Travel Pass with Verizon, so my phone works great when you have service, and then Wi-Fi even better. But not everybody’s phone was working, or they even had it on. So we kind of lost track of the group. Finally find someone, and guess what we find out? Rhonda, who was one of the head people on this trip, helped put it together. She rented a scooter, and she ran into a wall.

So it was like; you’re coming up on a left turn type of thing, and you meant to hit the break and you hit the gas instead. Runs into a wall, breaks three ribs. She, I forget what she did to her ankle. She strained some tendons in her ankle, so she didn’t break it. So she has to go to the hospital in St. Bart’s. And we don’t really know what’s going down. We just know that they had to go to the hospital. And we just kind of wait. And then they go back to pick her up, and she’s in so much pain. If you’ve never broken a rib; I have not. You probably don’t know how much pain it is. But coming from my husband, who doesn’t really like to show pain at all. He’s broken a rib, and he said it was the worst experience of his life.

And there’s nothing you can do about this pain. (sorry, I had to let the dog out.” There’s nothing you can do about this pain. It’s not like you can mend these ribs. They just have to heal on their own. So there we go. She is stuck in a lot of pain. And the doctor wants her to come back the next day. So we had to wait in Gustavia to go back the next morning, go back to the hospital. So as we’re waiting, and she’s at the hospital, and we don’t really know what’s going on. We’re like; you know what? Let’s just f*cking get drunk. There’s nothing else to do; why don’t we just get drunk here?

We get pretty drunk, and then we’re still kind of bored on the boat. We didn’t want to go back to town because we’d kind of seen everything in town. So we’re like; ok. Let’s snorkel. Because I hadn’t snorkeled yet. And I was like, I’m just going to give it a fair chance. I’m going to try this snorkeling thing. So we started snorkeling. And we’re not seeing anything. And we keep swimming towards the spot that our captain said it would be good snorkeling.

And this guy is in a little tiny boat, and he keeps waving. I’m like, what the f*ck? Stop waving at me. I trust no one. I listen to many murder podcasts. I know what happens to people who trust others. Especially in a tiny boat who is telling me to swim towards him. No thanks! So I just put my head down and keep on swimming.

And then we see nothing. And we’re pretty close to the rock where there would be good snorkeling. I’m like, Vanessa. That’s a jellyfish. And I’m 100% not down to be in this water anymore. Ok? I saw one fish, and then I saw some jellyfish and I’m f*cking over it. So we start swimming back. And this guy keeps waving to us. And I’m like, what the f*ck? Leave us alone. Then he starts taking his little podunk boat towards us. And I’m like, Vanessa! He’s chasing us! And I’m probably drunk at this point. Well, I am. And I’m like, let’s get out of here. So we’re swimming towards the boat. And he finally gives up.

So we find out a little bit later that there were jellyfish all over. All over, not just the one we saw. And there were some sharks in there. And not like great white sharks and probably sharks that wouldn’t give a sh*t about you. Who knows. I don’t know. I don’t know what sharks do, and I don’t want to find out. But there were sharks in the water there, and so he was probably yelling at us for that. But I’m thinking of the moving Taken, and I’m not going to be Taken in St. Bart’s. {laughs} That would actually probably be very nice. But no. Not happening to me, no thank you! So we got out of the water.

But anyway. That was Gustavia. If you can go to Gustavia, you have to. It’s like this town is full of Dulce and Gaba, Gucci, Fendi. It’s like, all the most expensive stores that I’ve never shopped at in my life, and probably will never shop at. But it’s very French. Very high end, high class. Very rich. And there’s Tom’s Juice Bar. Which makes it all great.

What was very surprising; not surprising, but surprising. Everyone, because most of the people on our boat, too, and then everyone while we traveled smoked. And it’s just like; over there, they have those cigarette packages that have people on their deathbed. They had some weird one of a skinny naked guy curled up in the fetal position. I was like; what is this? Is this supposed to show depression? I’m not sure what the package is trying to give off. But I’m grossed out. I don’t want to smoke it. There’s a naked dude on it. Gross. Naked dude, skinny, curled up bodies aren’t sexy. Personally.

So it was just weird to see everybody smoking. Just because; believe me, I smoked a decent amount in college. I went through a stage; I had a boyfriend who smoked and who chewed. So I went through a stage of smoking. Just went through random stages. Like in high school, because this one skinny girl I wanted to be like, she smoked so I smoked like her. And then I had a boyfriend who smoked. So I was obviously very stupid.

But it’s so weird when you see adults smoking. When you’re like; you know how bad that is for you. There are so many things that are better for you out there. And you still smoke. But whatever; I guess I was drinking and drinking is poison, too. So who am I to judge? Hmm? Who am I?

So next we went to; and I’m probably pronouncing it wrong. But it’s Ile Fourchue, in St. Bart’s. And so this island; this is the island we went to after the whole accident went down. So Rhonda is high on drugs, on pain medication. Her boyfriend, who was on the back. He is probably hung over, and then he was on medication as well because he was in the accident. So he has some sickness and dehydration going on. Probably some sunstroke. Other people have sunstroke. And now the dehydration has set in.

Because here’s the thing; no one drinks enough water. Very few people, I’m thinking right now, how thirsty I am. Very few people drink enough water. So then you put yourself in the crazy sun of the Caribbean, so hot all day and you’re still not drinking that much water, you’re going to get dehydrated so fast. You’re in the salt water; you’re sweating all that water out. So we had a lot of sickness this day on Ile Fourchue. So we have multiple people puking off the back of the boat. There was definitely some sea sickness going on, for people who have some issues with boat and sea sickness.

So we get to this island; Ile Fourchue. And it’s beautiful. Nobody is there. Literally no one is there. Which was the same case for multiple islands that we went to. And this island is very rocky. It kind of reminds me of where I grew up in Golden, like it has these low little mountains. I don’t know. Just low little mountains. So you can hike up it. So me and my sister-in-law started to go hiking, and she immediately pukes. {laughs} So she sits on the beach and just is like; she said that she kept just puking, and the water would take it away. And then she’d puke again, and the water. So she wasn’t having a good time.

Vanessa started to come up with me, and she felt sick, so she had to go a different direction on the mountain. Because I just wanted to go straight up. I didn’t want to go to the side; I just wanted to go straight up, get it over with. And the trail wasn’t really happening. So I’m like; I’m just going to forge my own trail. Which, as we know, as humans, that’s not always the best idea. I immediately step on a cactus.

And I had to buy these sh*tty little shoes, because pro tip. Bring f*cking hiking shoes. Or tennis shoes. I did not do that, because Vanessa didn’t tell me to. I just thought we were going to be on a boat 24/7. I’m like, why do I need tennis shoes if I’m on a boat? Well, you do. And that would have been very helpful. Because I had to buy these little $20 sh*t-ass Keds type shoes in St. Martin. And of course, the cactus went right through it, into my foot, which was swollen for the whole week. I thought my foot was going to fall off. But it’s fine.

So, I went up this mountain. And it was the most beautiful view. I hate hiking, but I totally get why people like seeing views. I just don’t give a sh*t about Colorado views when you’re seeing all these mountains. Maybe because I grew up in mountains. But when you get to see the ocean; where you’re like, literally it looks like the world. You can see the end of the earth. It’s crazy to me. So that was fun.

Then we went to Grand Case in St. Martin. So halfway through the trip, they have you go eat in one of the towns that you stop in. And this is so they can clean the boat and clean all the linens, and the towels, and just get everything kind of pressed and ready to go. So the whole group goes out for a dinner. So we went to Grand Case, and we went to a place called Calmos Café. And had amazing food on the beach. Literally, as you’re eating, your toes are getting dipped in the water because the tide starts coming up higher and higher. So we all had dinner there, and that was really good.

And then, there was a gelato place. Just a couple of doors down. And Vanessa and I got down on some gelato, and it was magical. Gelato is the best. Dessert is the best. Vanessa and I are really the only people who ate dessert. And I had ceviche with French fries. I mean, does it get better than that? No.

Next stop was Dog Island. So don’t be alarmed. Well, not alarmed. Don’t be disappointed. There were no dogs on this island. It’s a bullsh*t lie. But there were birds. I’m not sure why it’s not called bird island. Because it’s like a bird sanctuary. I don’t know, maybe the guy who chose its last name was dog. I don’t know. But it’s owned by Anguilla. And it was my favorite island. My favorite. It’s like, you can only go on the beach. You can’t go into the island because it’s private property. It’s like a bird sanctuary. So it’s like, don’t touch the birds. And there’s other wildlife, like cows or something. I don’t know. Don’t care. The beach was the softest, whitest, most beautiful beach. And it was just stunning. It was just awesome. There’s really nothing to say about it, it’s just so beautiful. I highly recommend going there if you can.

And then we went to Road Bay next. So Road Bay, it’s like a little. I don’t know. I don’t know. It’s hard to explain it. It’s like a little town. But our captain, Jordan, told us that it was a sleepy little town. And this town played music. Imagine reggae all night long until you wake up, and it’s going hard. And it’s like a DJ talking. It’s literally they don’t sleep. They just party all night long. So I don’t know how the f*ck it’s a sleepy little town. But it was really cool. And I got to workout on the beach there, and get good workouts in. And they had restaurants that lined the beach; restaurants and bars. So you can go get drinks. So we got expensive drinks on the beach there. But just totally worth it because we could swim ashore and get drinks with our feet in the sand. It was just delightful.

And then we had Sandy Island. And Sandy Island is this little remote island in the middle of the ocean that has these beautiful palm trees and a bar. That’s it. You just go get a drink. An expensive drink. {laughs} And then you sit on the beach. And it’s like a pretty touristy spot. So get there early. Because I think the bar opens at 11. But if you can get there before, just kind of enjoy it. Because it picks up really quickly. But it was so cute, and the sand was beautiful. Just super nice.

And then we went to Prickly Pear Island, which is also Anguilla. And another beach that was dead. It was a beach that had a bar and a restaurant, but it didn’t seem like they were open. It was in the afternoon, so who knows if it’s still open. But there was only one other couple on the beach when we were there. We were the only other people there. And it was beautiful. Just so nice. I’m guessing why they call it Prickly Pear is because they had those little prickers. You know those little things that are like balls, and they have spikes all over them? That’s what would get stuck in your feet while you were walking. So Prickly Pear fo’sho. But beautiful beach. It’s hard to get into. It’s hard to dinghy into. But it is stunning.

Then, where else did we go? Oh my gosh, oh my gosh. I have so many different places, I’m losing track. Then we went to Meads Bay. Meads Bay in Anguilla. So, Meads Bay. At this time when we were sailing, the festival Carnival was going on. And so it was going through different islands or different areas of Anguilla. And it would have a huge show, so it was like a huge party. And we had just missed it the night before at Roads Bay. So it was at Meads Bay. And I was pumped. Because here’s the thing. I was on a boat with all people; most people who like dance music. And a lot of dance music was going on. But to me, I listen to dance music because I want to dance. Especially if you even get one cocktail in me. I’m going to start dancing. And nobody else was dancing. So I was like, sweet. Whatever. I’ll go to shore and I’ll get to go dance. Reggae is not my kind of music, but I can dance to anything. I’ll f*cking pull it out.

So we go in, and there’s a huge stage. And there’s vendors all around. And people have drinks. And they’re all crowded around the stage. And literally no one is dancing. Could you imagine being at a concert, or a show, and everybody is standing there. No one is moving. There’s a girl or two moving her hips just a little bit. Just a little twerk of the ass. One cheek, two cheek, three cheek, you know what I’m saying. That’s it. Nobody was dancing. I was like, this sucks! So I kept trying. And I was like, this blows. I’d rather just go wade in the water and pee. So that’s what I did.

But I had a great workout on that beach. Swam to shore. I was a swimmer growing up, and I forgot how hard swimming is. And my triceps were so sore. Well, not sore, but on fire while I was swimming. It was awesome. It kind of makes me want to swim again. I just hate getting my hair wet in a nasty ass chlorine pool that I probably just peed in.

Anywho. Next is Rendezvous Bay. So this was a very different kind of bay that we went to. Because we went to a bar and restaurant that is owned by some famous singer that I’ve never heard of before, but his name is Banksy Banks. Not exactly clever with the name. No offense to him. But the most magical voice you will ever hear.

So you know John Legend. John Legend has this calming, cooling, beautiful voice. So it’s a mixture of John Legend and kind of Bob Marley-ish. I know. I’m not making it. Whatever, he’s a beautiful singer. It was so good.

So we go to this bar restaurant, and we get to listen to Banksy Banks sing and play, just for us. Nobody else is there at the moment. And then also, first mate Ryan, he is a musician, and he plays the guitar. So he played for us a ton. And then he got to play with Banksy Banks. How cool is that? So we got to watch them play together. And then Jordan strummed the guitar. I was like, what is happening? Such an odd thing.

And so we were like, the one thing we all regretted was we went in, and everyone was to shore, and everyone was having a good time. And they were like; well do you want to eat here or eat on the boat. And we didn’t want to make Ryan go away from playing. And everybody was like, let’s just stay here. But then it ended up costing us like $80 for our food and drink, of not the most amazing food ever. I was just like, how did this become $80, when we could have just eaten on the boat for the money we had already spent. So that was kind of a bummer. Because you still want to get drinks at some places and spend that money, but then you’re like; ok, I’m running out of money kind of quickly. But I’ll get into that in a second. So we see him play, and it’s wonderful. And then we went back. That was our last stop. Then we went back to Marigot Bay for our last night.

So some of the cool things that happened while we were on the trip. We got to see Captain Jordan catch a fish, twice. He caught a fish, got it onto the boat, and then the line broke, so he lost the fish. And then the second one. He got this, I forget what it was called. Some kind of tuna. Blonde fish tuna maybe? Or something like that. We got this tuna, so we got to have the tuna right out of the ocean and have it sashimi style. And then they also caught lobsters. So they got this lobster, pull them out. And I’m starting to get super depressed. I’m all for eating animals, it’s just sad seeing them, knowing they’re going to die. Seeing them stuck. It’s sad. It’s sad. So I’m getting all sad.

But, as they pull the second lobster out; Jordan pulls the second lobster out, and it is f*cking; it’s not going home with us. That’s what it’s saying. It’s like, I will fight you to the death motherf*cker. So Jordan kind of lifts it up, and you can see that it’s pregnant. Literally, eggs everywhere. It’s really gross. But he left it, obviously, back in the ocean. So we had one lobster, and cooked that lobster up. And had the tuna sashimi. So that was really cool to see him catch a fish. It’s crazy how exhausting catching a fish is.

We loved having Ryan play his guitar. He was such a good musician. Loved getting to see Banksy Banks. Tom’s Juice Bar was totally my favorite in Gustavia. And then the meals that they cook on the boat are all incredibly delicious. So you get a starter. You get an entrée. And then you get a dessert every time. And they always make you drinks and ask if you want any wine with dinner, or lunch, or whenever you’re eating. So all the meals were amazing. There was fish one night. There were; what else. There was pork loin. We had frittatas in the morning. I said I was gluten free, so they made flourless chocolate cake, and they got gluten free bread for any of the breakfast stuff.

The one thing I wish I would have done. I wish I would have said no eggs. Because I can eat eggs just fine, it’s just my skin breaks out. So it just always sucks when you’re sunscreened up, anyways so your skin is going to break out. Then you add on, what’s it called. Like an allergy on top of it. So I wish I would have asked for no eggs. But you get to pick, when you fill out this little survey beforehand, you get to say what kind of drinks you like. What you stay away from. Say you have some sort of allergy. And they work around that. So that’s super helpful. But all the meals were awesome.

Oh my gosh. My sister-in-law just stopped by, so that was just a surprise, surprise. Sorry for the interruption. So all the meals were so, so amazing. And they really work around whatever you need. And I’m so stupid. They’re like, “What’s your favorite drink?” What do I say? Sparkling water. Because I’m like, I don’t really have a favorite drink. And they meant like an alcoholic beverage. And I say water. Because I’m like, “Well I only really drink water.” I’m f*cking stupid.

So other favorite parts were I got to sit in the dolphin seat. Which they have this seat that kind of pokes out the front of the boat. They have two of them, and it feels like you’re on a rollercoaster. It goes up and down when you’re sailing. It’s so much fun. They also have a hammock; not all boats, but this boat. Jordan hung up a hammock to sleep in at night. So I was finally like; can I lie in that before you put it away for the day? And I got to lie in it. And it’s like you’re flopping all around like a little ragdoll. It’s just the best time. It was so much fun, I wish I would have done that more.

Some of the things you should definitely bring on a trip is cash for tips, restaurants, and shops. The one thing I did not like about the trip was the last day. Not only did we spend a lot of money at the Banksy Banks place, and that was our choice. But then when we got to Marigot Bay for that night, we expected to eat dinner on the boat. And they were like, hey we’re all going to go to this restaurant and eat dinner there. And we looked at this restaurant, and it’s like $30 for a burger. It’s like, just a little excessive when you’ve paid $1,000 for your all-inclusive fee. So that was kind of a bummer.

And we’re like; we’re spending more money. And we wanted to make sure we had enough tips to tip them. Because I think they say 15-18% of the all-inclusive fee. And so, we wanted to make sure we wanted to have enough tip. So we ended up having to go to an ATM. But going to that touristy restaurant cut into that tip money. They could have gotten more money. So we were just kind of forced to eat out that last night when I was like, I just want to spend my last time on the boat. I can go hang out at these bars and restaurants when I’m not sailing anymore. We were sleeping on the boat that night.

So it was just kind of; that was a weird part that I’m like, this is cutting into the tips that Jordan and Ryan have worked so hard for. So I don’t know if they were made to do that, or they just wanted to do that. But I wasn’t super into that. So it’s good to have a decent amount of cash on hand. It’s better to have more, so you don’t have to go to the ATM. Because I haven’t even looked at the charge of the fees that I get for using that ATM with their bank, plus with my own bank. So I don’t even want to look at the fee. So that was kind of a bummer. It was just more money than I thought I would spend, just because of that last day more than anything.

Definitely recommend bringing floats. If you don’t have a float, you just don’t get to float as much. And we left our floats, so hopefully they kind of transfer those over to more boats. They just keep the floats in case anybody doesn’t have any. But I think they do, because they had noodles and other stuff that we were able to play with. But we brought our own floats that I just bought on Amazon that kind of folded down.

Bring lots of conditioner and leave-in conditioner, I guess unless you’re a dude. But ladies; your hair gets f*cking torn apart out at sea. It’s just whipped around. It’s in a tangled mess. I did a topknot every day because I couldn’t keep it down anymore. I was like, I literally can’t even put a hat on because it’s such a rat’s nest. So I had to just put it in some sketch ass bun.

Sneakers for hiking. Made that mistake. Will not do that again. More sunscreen than ever. You can always buy sunscreen when you get there, it’s just expensive. But I just did a bunch of travel on ones. The 3.4. and my sister-in-law and I shared those, and we were totally fine.

A water bottle that holds ice and keeps it cold and doesn’t sweat. And then you drink way more than you would if it’s just in a glass getting warm by the second. Lots of sunglasses, coverups to kind of get your shoulders out of the sun. Shorts and T-shirts to wear when you’re in a town. Because I didn’t really put more clothes on than that.

And if you get seasick, definitely bring some Dramamine. I know that a couple of people on the boat got these little patches that you can put behind your ear, but they’re prescription ones. So if you can get those ahead of time, that’s awesome. But I have never had seasickness. I don’t know what that feels like. Even when we were in our cabin, and we were rocking back and forth. To me, that’s just rocking in your mother’s arms as a child. It just feels comforting more than anything. So yeah, I loved it. But just keep that in mind, that you can definitely get seasick.

So I didn’t say all the places, because I was forgetting it. But Trade Winds; and this is not sponsored by Trade Winds. This is totally my experience with them. I would totally tell you if it was. But they do Caribbean, South Pacific, Central America, and the Mediterranean. So now I really want to do French Polynesia, Grenadine, BVI, and Greece. It’s just like, now I can’t imagine just going to an all-inclusive hotel and just staying there. Because this had all these activities built in. Because you’re going island hopping, and you’re going exploring. And you’re not just stuck.

So we went back to our hotel after we got off the boat the last morning. So you spend the night the last night, and then you have breakfast the morning off. And then they’re like, get off our boat! {laughs} Get out of here, we have to get cleaned up and get the next people on. So we went back to our hotel, the Westin that we stayed at before. And if I could do anything different, I would bring more cash for sure. And I would say, “hey can we actually eat dinner here.” Because that’s what we paid for, and I don’t drink that much alcohol. So I know I haven’t drank my money yet. {laughs} So can we do the food instead.

But the big thing I would change, is we went back to our hotel and stayed at our hotel the night, and then we had a flight out the next day at 2:30. I would have, since we get off the boat by 9, I would have just booked my flight that same day at 2:30, go to the beach and hang out. Because there’s the beach that’s right next to the airport that people always have video of a plane right above them. I would have just gone to that beach, checked it out, and then gone straight to the airport. Because then you’re paying for more taxis. You’re paying for a hotel. You’re paying for your food at the hotel. So it’s just way more extra money for that last night when we could have just flown home, been in our own beds. Got the day over with with flying. So that’s my biggest regret. I wish I would have just gone straight home and saved just a little extra money. So that’s how I see it. What I would have done differently.

But now; my husband and I have always talked about getting a vacation home. And now I’m like, I don’t want a vacation home. I just want to travel every year to a new place and sail to different islands and different oceans. Just so freaking cool. It was such a sweet experience. If you can do it, I highly recommend it. It’s such an amazing way to see places that you maybe never would. Because maybe you go to St. Bart’s, and you stay in St. Bart’s. But you’re not going to go, most likely, to 12 different areas when you’re going to one island. You’ll go to maybe 3 or 4, but not 12. So this is just such an amazing way to see the world from a different angle, I guess. That sounds so corny. But it was so cool, and I highly recommend it. If you can make it happen in your life, do it. It was awesome.

And I did a full blog post with a sh*t ton of pictures on my blog if you just go to the travel section of I have a list of everything we did, all the photos. I even share swimsuits and coverups that I took with me. Sunglasses. All that jazz. So I just do a huge breakdown there. And you can ask any questions that you have, and hopefully I can answer some of them. But yeah, it’s the best. It was the coolest experience. I can’t wait to go back. And I can’t wait for my husband to experience it. Because it’s so sad when you experience such an amazing thing without your significant other. Now I have to make up for it with sushi and Comedy Works. If you guys haven’t been to Comedy Works in Denver, it’s the best. It’s the best comedy place ever.

Ok, that’s all I have for now. And since I’ve been gone, and people have been covering shifts for me, I have to go work a couple of shifts at the gym tonight. So I’ve got to get on my way. Get to doing stuff. Get to marinating a flank steak to make for myself tonight. The guy was like, do you want this entire flank steak? I was like, yeah, yeah, sure. Then it was 3 pounds and like $36. I was like, oh, sweet. Dinner by myself. Dinner for one for 3 pounds. Perfect.

Ok. That’s all I have to tell you about today. Head to the blog. This week I shared a swimsuit that I wore in the Caribbean. A one-piece swimsuit. I shared the travel post. And then I also shared a recipe for coconut ceviche, which was inspired by a recipe I had at that Bo Kao place in Gustavia. And then I also shared a jicama apple slaw inspired by something I ate while I was in Austin. So go try out those recipes. I also shared all my workouts that I did in the Caribbean. And those were all workouts that I made up on the spot with no weights, just your body weight. So if you’re traveling and you don’t have any weights. Or you’re on a beach. Or you’re in your hotel room. This would be a great option. So head to the blog for that.

I didn’t yawn that many times this podcast around. Not too shabby, ok? Ok. I’m off to coach. I’ll see you next time. See you next week! Have a grand case day. Whatever that means. Love you, bye!

Talking about my recent trip to the Caribbean! Where we traveled, who we sailed with, what we did, ate, drank and everything in between! ____________ Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you […] Talking about my recent trip to the Caribbean! Where we traveled, who we sailed with, what we did, ate, drank and everything in between! ____________ Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:03:45
Stuff I’m Loving Right Now – Episode 46: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 05 Aug 2017 11:56:12 +0000 16 Chatting about all of my favorite things as of late while I run errands and cook for my husband before I leave for the Caribbean. It’s all about multitasking on this episode! Tinkle Face Razors Mind Pump Podcast Collagen Single […] Chatting about all of my favorite things as of late while I run errands and cook for my husband before I leave for the Caribbean. It’s all about multitasking on this episode!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 46 Transcription!

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

1. My Favorite Things: Beauty [25:43]
2. My Favorite Thing: Food [37:20]
3. My Favorite Things: Travel [46:47]

Juli Bauer: Well hello. Welcome to the 46th episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. At the moment, I am doing this podcast on the go. Because time is just getting shorter and shorter every single day of my aging life. Just because I’m leaving for the Caribbean at midnight tonight. This is Thursday. So I’m recording this podcast while I get all my things done that I need to do. So at the moment I’m in the car driving my way to; where am I going right now? I’m going to get a spray tan. Because, you know, you’ve got to get that dark on before the Caribbean. That fake bronze. Everybody loves that fake bronze, right? It just rubs off on all my sheets.

Here’s what; oh my god. I don’t understand this. And I think I’ve talked about this before. But, if you look at Like To Know It; and I’ve talked about Like To Know It a lot. But they have Like To Know It home; and all the picture on Like To Know It home of bedrooms are white sheets. It’s like; white covers, white duvets, white pillow cases, white sheets. It’s all white. And I’m like; ok. That is 100% not reality. Because first of all, who is that reality for? Because there’s dogs. My dog doesn’t get on the bed, but there’s a lot of people who have dogs on the bed.

Second of all; spray tans. If you could see what my sheets looked like two days ago before I washed them, you would be so disgusted. It’s like I never drank a sip of water in my life, and then peed all over my bed. That is the color that is spread throughout my bedsheets. Because as soon as I get a spray tan; even after I wash it off, I still sweat at night. My husband touches me with his finger, and I’m like; “Ah! I’m too hot!” So, I sweat that spray tan in the creases; you know the creases of your elbows, or knee pits. Whatever those are called. The sweat begins. And my white sheets, that I accidentally bought white because I wasn’t using my brain to its fullest capability. Those white sheets are now brown sheets. And bleach doesn’t get that sh*t out.

Does bleach even work? I don’t think it does. I think all that bleach does is ruin clothes when you pour it directly onto black fabric. But for actually whitening whites, no. I don’t think it works. My husband doesn’t believe me that I use bleach on our sheets. And I f*cking do. Skin is gross. Skin cells are disgusting. I bleach that sh*t.

So anyways. {laughs} I’m going to get a spray tan. And then I am trying to be a good wife. Because I’ve said this many million times; my husband works a f*ck ton. So I don’t know; {laughs} ok. We have to make sure you actually eat while I’m gone. And remember there’s poke bowl place nearby. There’s Mod Market. And he’s like, “those are expensive.” I’m like, ok. That’s fine. You just have to eat. So I’m trying to be a good wife. I loaded up on groceries for him. Things that are easy to grab and go. And make quickly.

But then I’m also making him a breakfast casserole, so he can just have breakfast each morning. And then I’m making my pizza casserole. Which is one of the most popular recipes on my website, on I have this pizza casserole. And it’s usually made with spaghetti squash. But since spaghetti squash is not in season right now, I’m using butternut squash noodles. So we’ll see how that goes. It could be f*cking disgusting, I have no idea. But, I’m sure he’ll eat it. He’s a dude.

So I’m making those two things today. I have to pack. Get the house cleaned up so I don’t leave it in complete disarray. Get some laundry done. And record this podcast. And I’m trying to finish up a few of my blogposts before I leave, because I just don’t know what the internet/Wi-Fi situation is going to be. Because; I’ve talked about this trip, so sorry if I’m repeating myself. But as I’ve noticed as I listen to podcasts, I tend to start from the very beginning with podcasts. Meaning, the newest one. The top of the podcast, and then work my way down. Which I wish people wouldn’t do that. I wish they would start from the beginning, so you can really get to know me and feel how annoying I am from the start.

But anyway. I am going on this Caribbean trip. My friend, Vanessa, who has been on the podcast a couple of times. She is a blogger of Clean Eating With a Dirty Mind. And she had this trip planned. This yacht trip through the Caribbean that she did last year with 10 people. And she loved it so much that she booked it again, through different islands. And they had two friends who dropped out. Broke up; needed somebody to fill the spot. I said, f*ck yes. Here’s my money. And then I invited my husband. He can’t take that many days off of work in a row. So I invited my sister-in-law. So she is coming. She is awesome. And she’s pretty much the female version of my husband. So that’s pretty cool.

We are going to St. Martin. We’re flying into St. Martin, where Vanessa is getting married, and I get to be her witness. Which is pretty rad. And then we’re boarding our little yacht. And it’s 10 people, so 5 different rooms. And then we sail through St. Martin to St. Kitts and Nevis; St. Barts, Anguilla, I think that’s it. I can’t remember any of the other ones. Especially because I’ve never been to any of these places. I really couldn’t even show you were they’re on a map, honestly. I wish I would have remembered geography. Why do they have to teach you that sh*t so early? That sh*t’s gone.

Oh, speaking of traveling. Because today’s podcast I’m talking about all my favorite things, and I’m going to have travel on there. And I’m jumping ahead of myself. But the other day, of course. I’m 29 years old; what comes up? F*cking pregnancy. Every week. Every damn week. And they’re like, “Are you thinking about it?” I’m like, no. 100% no. I’m having too much fun traveling as much as possible. And they’re like, “Do you get bored with traveling?” I’m like, I don’t know, do you get bored with parenthood? Traveling is never ending. Parenthood is never ending. So I have no idea. I don’t think I’m going to get bored with traveling. Tired, sure. Traveling is tiring. But bored? No. F*cking pregnancy questions. Every week.

Speaking of pregnancy. I went to the doctor finally. Can we talk about why pap smears are the worst thing ever? Going through another pap. And I’ve had many in my life; obviously. I’m a female. And I’ve been on birth control since I was a teenager. So you go in, and get checked out, all the time. But going to the pap is a constant reminder of why I have another thing to add to my list of why I don’t want to have children yet. Because there is someone digging in there all the time. Shoving things up there. Looking in there. Whatever their little thing. It’s like a duckbill that they turn and open up your vagina. Um, no. I don’t want that. And I don’t want something coming out of it. No.

This person; oh my gosh. This awesome company that I’ve been able to work with in the past, they reposted one of my photos on Instagram. And then this girl wrote on there. She was like, “I used to like Juli, but then she talked about how the only reason she doesn’t want to have kids is because it’s going to ruin her body. She’s so vain.” I was like, what the f*ck?! I literally did a podcast on 46 reasons why I don’t want to have a child right now. And one of those reasons was being scared of how it’s going to change my body. And that includes your vagina, ok. This is not just outside. What happens inside is quite frightening, ok? I understand it’s a muscle. It goes back. But there are tears involved, and it’s scary.

But yeah, I was like, there is no way I was like, “I’m just scared it’s going to ruin my body.” No. It’s the financial. It’s the emotional. It’s the; like a million things that go along with having a child. Very frightening. 29 years old. I guess I’m supposed to be over that fear, but not there yet. Nope. Still on the kick of just wanting to travel instead. So that’s what’s been going on around these parts of the woods.

I’m so excited for this trip, though. I’m trying to not be on social media. Because that’s my job. I’m trying to stay off my job as much as I can. I’ve written most of my posts ahead of time. I’m almost done with all of them. And so my assistant, she can post them while I’m gone. And then just make sure they actually go live on time and everything looks how it’s supposed to look. So I’m so excited. Just kind of stay off. Relax.

There will be a lot of boat time. A lot of little floating time. I bought two little floaties for me and my sister-in-law, so we can just float with our cocktails right behind the boat. And what else? I brought exercise bands so we can do workouts on the beach. I’m going to force my sister-in-law. I love to workout; she does not love to workout, but she always works out, still. She always comes in. She’s like, “I hate working out!” But she still does it, like a little badass chick. Badass b*tch, you know? So I’m going to slightly force her into workouts with me. Vanessa, when I was on book tour with her, we did constant workouts. She works out like 6 days a week. She works out more than I do, and f*cking loves it. So she will be easy to talk into.

And this girl; oh my god, if you haven’t read Vanessa’s blog, it’s Clean Eating With a Dirty Mind. And she recently; I didn’t even know this until I just saw her a couple of weeks ago. She decided to cut out drinking altogether starting in the New Year. So as soon as January 1st hit, she stopped drinking. And this is a girl who loves to drink. She’s a good partier. She’s good at hanging out. She can really hang. And she stopped drinking altogether. And so she’s like, I wonder if I’m going to drink when I get on this trip? I don’t know. I don’t know if I’m going to try to only drink a little. I’m not sure if I’m not going to drink at all.

But she did a whole blog post about not drinking. And kind of the difference she’s seen with not drinking, and how good she’s felt. And I think it’s an amazing blog post to read. So if you just go to Clean Eating With a Dirty Mind. I think she posted it; it’s her most recent post, unless she’s posted since then. But it’s like her maple fig cake, which looks f*cking awesome. This girl is so good with photography, it blows my mind. But check out that. I think people always need a little reminder of how much alcohol is terrible for you. And I do those reminders, and I’ve done podcasts about it whenever I do a cocktail recipe, I try to remind people that alcohol is poison. So be aware. But poison can be fun. So you’ve got to find the balance for sure. So it will be interesting to see if she drinks much on this trip, or if she doesn’t.

I always feel like I love drinks at the beginning of a trip, and then I feel like sh*t even if I’ve only had like 3 drinks. Because they’re usually pretty sugary on vacations. I go more the fun sugar route, and then I just get over it. And I don’t want to drink vodka sodas, I think that tastes like sh*t. I’d rather just drink water. So I usually drink at the beginning, and then I’m over it. So we’ll have to see what happens with that with all of us.

And I’ve never met any of these other people. So I know Vanessa, I know her fiancé, soon to be husband. Which I get to witness. I’m so excited for that. And then my sister-in-law. So I know 3 people on the boat out of 10. I guess I know 4, because I know myself pretty good, you know what I’m saying. So that will be so cool.

Ok, I’m pulling up to get my spray tan on, so I’m going to keep going throughout the day. Keep giving you updates as things go by. This is an update. So maybe less yawning! Oh my god, this is so exciting. I don’t think I’ve yawned the entire 13 minutes of this podcast so far. Bravo, Juli. Oh my god, I feel like I’m going to yawn now I’m thinking about it. Ok, I’ll be right back. Ok? Bye.

Ok. We’re back in the car. We’re back on it. I am sticky. I’m tacky. Tacky in multiple ways. I have a grease bun. I wish I could get out of this stage of having a grease bun on top of my head, but I’m sure as not going to wash my hair every day. That’s hella truth. So I just got my spray tan on. I seriously love; I never liked getting spray tans before because I always felt like I turned really orange. And then I started going to this place called Glamour Bar in Denver. So if you’re listening to this podcast and you live in Denver, you should go to Lindsey at Glamour Bar, she’s really, really awesome. But I don’t look orange anymore, which is fabulous.

So now, I’ve got my bronze on. This is a spray tan that you leave on for however tan you want to be. So one hour for light tan, then you shower it off. Two hours for medium. Three plus hours for dark. So I’m leaving it on like 6, for sure. Until I smell like all hell. So now I’ve got to head back home and make the casseroles for my husband. Finish up some laundry. And what else do I need to do? I have this whole long to-do list. We don’t have to leave our house until 10:30 at night.

You know how red-eyes always seem like the best idea? And they are when you get to your destination by dinner time and not midnight. But fudge. They are hard. They are not so fun. I usually take some sort of sleeping medication if I have a longer flight. But this first flight, we go to Charlotte, and it’s just 3.5 hours. So you don’t want to be groggy and feel like sh*t the rest of the day, and be in and out. That’s just not going to fly. So I’m staying away from the sleeping pills. And I’m just going to try to sleep it out. I’m hoping my fatigue just sets in and sleep that 3.5 hours.

Because then we get to Charlotte, and it’s like 6 in the morning. We fly out again at 9. We’ll probably just grab some breakfast. And then I’m just going to work on my computer the rest of the time. Because you can’t really sleep, because it’s f*cking 9 a.m. and then you’re like, oh. So anyways. Then our net flight is like 4 hours or something like that. And then we get to the Caribbean at 2. So that’s pretty sweet. And I’m pretty sure Vanessa gets married right away. So we just freaking get changed, get married, eat some dinner.

Oh my gosh. I pulled out cash for this trip. Maybe I should go to the bank. Maybe I’ll do that. I pulled out cash for this trip, and then of course I’ve used like $100 of it. It’s like, oh a coffee here. A spray tan there. Like, whatever, whatever. And I’m like, why did I even pull this cash out? Why am I using all this cash when I should just be using my card? So now I need to go get more cash. So I have money to go to these little fun restaurants when we’re, you know, stopping in an island.

So I wanted to tell you guys about a podcast I just started listening to. I’ve listened to them once before, but then I just got too much into my True Crime podcasts. So athleticism, nutrition podcasts, they kind of took the back seat. But I’m back in it again. There’s only so much True Crime you can go over. That’s not true. True Crime is f*cking unlimited, sadly. But, ok.

So if you don’t follow Joy and Clare on Girls Gone WOD, you should totally follow them. They live here in Denver. I’ve been on their podcast before. And they’re my close friends; they’re awesome. But they were on a podcast called Mind Pump. So I listened to the episode that they were on. And I just really liked these guys. So anyways. I listened to the one podcast they were on, but then I just never got back into it. And so Joy the other day, she started talking about how she was a little frustrated how CrossFit seemed to be going the route of how lean can you get type of idea, I don’t know. And I just saw a couple of her Instagrams, I didn’t talk to her that much about it.

But she posted about a podcast from Mind Pump where they kind of talk about that kind of stuff. So I listened to that episode, and loved it. They had; I don’t even know what episode it is. And that’s so unhelpful. But I highly recommend, if you can, listening to Mind Pump. I’m so in love with these guys. They’re just no bullsh*t kind of guys. They’re not like, “Oh, here, I’m trying to sell you this protein powder. I’m trying to sell you this supplement. I’m trying to tell you that this is what’s the only thing that’s going to work.” They’re just no-bullsh*t type of guys, and I really, really appreciate that in fitness. Because all you see; and now, especially. It’s like, “Vegan is the way you have to be. You have to take supplements. You have to take BCAAs.” Or whatever the f*ck they are. I always get questions about those, and I’m like, I literally don’t know what those are, and I don’t care.

But I’m a person who believes that if you need to supplement with something, it’s because something is missing in your diet. And so if you’re like, “Oh I need to have protein after a workout.” It’s like, ok. Get that in your diet. Eat some real protein. I don’t believe in protein powders. I have them on occasion, but I don’t believe in them as my actual nutrition. It’s just like, “Oh, I want to make a shake today. And I want to add something to it.” So I’m just adding a little bit to it. But I mostly kind of just do collagen.

But anyways, I’m getting totally off topic. These guys are just no-bullsh*t fitness and nutrition perspectives. And they’re so intelligent. And they’re just really easy to listen to. And they’re just not; they’re scientific, but not. It’s very; I haven’t listened to Robb Wolf’s podcast, but I have read his book, The Paleo Solution, and it’s very much how Robb Wolf writes. It’s easy to understand; he’s just easy to understand. It’s really nice. So these guys at Mind Pump; I highly recommend listening to them if you need a new podcast. And you need some perspective about working out and feeding yourself correctly.

It was just like this very, this podcast they’re talking about how actually restricting your diet can make you gain weight. And how this one woman they worked with, they wanted her to lose weight, but they really needed her to first dial in her nutrition. And she went from eating 1500 calories to 2600 calories. And she wasn’t losing any weight, but she was staying at that same weight. She was just dialing in her nutrition. And we’re just filled in a world where restriction and;

I just, my whole life, grew up thinking that I had to eat nothing, and workout all the time. And I did that for a long time. And all I did was gain weight. And I had inflammation. And I had issues. And once I threw that out the door, and I just started eating when my body said it wanted food. And I started working out once a day, taking two rest days a week, my body completely changed. I’ve said this so many times on podcasts. So hearing it from a male perspective, and them saying this, was just very satisfying. That’s not the correct word, really. But it was f*cking satisfying, listening to this podcast. And them telling women to eat, and take care of their bodies. It was f*cking cool. It was just nice. It was nice. So I highly recommend listening to that. I’ve been really into it. I’m going to download a bunch.

And I know this is a really popular podcast, but I’ve never listened to it. Still haven’t. But as I’m standing naked in front of my; I do have underwear on. But as I’m standing almost naked in front of my lovely woman, Lindsey, doing my spray tan, we’re talking about podcasts. And she’s telling me how she loves the podcast; sh*t. What is it? How I Did That? Ugh! It’s like an NPR one. Now I feel like an asshole because I don’t even know the name of it. But everybody knows, who’s listening. You’re like, “Oh, yeah. I listen to that one.” Now I’m trying to go to the top charts and look at it.

But anyways. I want to listen to that one. Because I’ve heard; it has popular people on it. Like some of the people on Shark Tank were on it. The woman who started Dry Bar. So I’m going to look up that one and listen to that on my flight. God, flights are the best time for podcasts. Flights and driving. And if you travel a lot, and you spend a lot of time in the car, and on the plane, download podcasts. Well, you probably already do because you’re listening to this one. So I don’t know if I really need to say that.

Anywho. Feeling spray tanny as hell. I’m almost home. And onto my next adventure with cooking. And then I’m going to talk about; what am I going to talk about? My favorite things today. I’m still making sure I have the full list of favorite things before I get into them. But I can’t look at my list and drive at the same time. That would be unsafe. So give me; well to you it’s going to be 4 seconds. Give me 4 seconds, ok? Ok? Ok, thanks so much. You’re the best. Bye!

Ok, we’re back in business. Back on it. Right now, you might be able to hear the food frying. I’m making my husband a breakfast casserole. And I’m actually filming it on Instagram as we speak, as well. So I’m multitasking the sh*t out of things right now. So I’ve got the breakfast sausage going. I’m going to make him a little casserole. So he’s happy as a clam. Breakfast is the one thing that he kind of lacks at making sure he eats. So, this is why I’m here for him. This is why I’m his wife. And because, I’m a real good time.

Anyway. I wanted to talk about some of my favorite things. I haven’t done this podcast in longer than I thought. It’s been like 10 episodes, maybe? It’s been a lot. So, I thought I’d do a little breakdown of things that I’m loving lately. Maybe I’ll talk about things that I’m not loving lately. Ok. Sometimes it’s fun to put a little bit of negativity out into the world. No, that’s not what I usually preach here. But f*ck it; I’m on vacation, bro!

1. My Favorite Things: Beauty [25:43]

So. Something I’m loving right now. And I actually just used it before I got my spray tan, is Tinkle. I know. I hate the name. Tinkle face razors. Or they’re called eyebrow razors, or something. I got them on Amazon. And I didn’t purchase this brand at first, but I thought the name was so f*cking stupid. No offense to them. But I wasn’t into the whole Tinkle sound. I think they’re going with; I don’t know what they’re going with. But I’m not into it. So anyway; I bought a different kind of face razor and hated it. It was terrible. And somebody on my blog recommended the Tinkle brand. So I just hate saying Tinkle. Don’t you feel like you’re a little school-age girl? I don’t know. It feels weird.

But anyway. Sorry if you hear random noises while I’m doing that. I know this is really annoying. But girl’s gotta work. So I bought this brand, reluctant at first. But I bought this Tinkle face razor. And I use it because I haven’t been able to see my esthetician as often, because I’ve been traveling and just super busy. So whenever I see my esthetician, she does dermaplane. Which is just like shaving your face. So I just got so accustomed to not having any hair on my face. And it pulls off dead skin as well. So your skin is just crazy smooth. So I got very accustomed to that. And now I notice people’s face hair all the time. I notice when people just need a dermaplane. So of course, I notice my skin right away. As soon as I need to shave my own face.

It sounds so weird. It’s weird; I try not to do it in front of my husband. I’m not sure how he’ll feel about that. So I got these Tinkle razors, and they’re just very good. They’re great. They get a ton of dead skin off. And you can get a really good smooth skin hairless face {laughs}. And it doesn’t; you don’t end up cutting yourself or scraping yourself, like I’ve had with other razors. So I’ve really loved this brand. I highly recommend them. And your skin just feels so much smoother. It just gets all the dead skin off.

My sister-in-law actually started using these kinds of razors because she had really dry skin. And that was the only thing. She tried exfoliants. It was when she moved to Colorado. She tried exfoliants, and they didn’t work. And she tried the razors, and she loves them. And she uses them on a regular basis, too. So we’re just, you know, sisters who love to shave our faces, you know? Yeah. So I’ve been doing that. Loving that brand. Highly recommend them. And you’ll notice your facial hair way more often. That’s a downside of it. That is a down side. But you know I love my esthetician. I’ve talked about her, I think, on every single favorite things podcast. And she’s amazing. But I can’t always get in; that sounds weird. I can’t always make it into her. So this has to do in the meantime.

Another thing I’ve been taking with me when I’ve been traveling, since I’ve been traveling so much, is collagen packs. So I get these on amazing. They’re the Great Lakes brand. And they just have little convenient single packs. Instead of having to pack your own Ziploc baggie of all your collagen, I just take these little packs with me.

I started taking collagen daily into my coffee, so in my daily routine, a few months ago. It was probably; it’s probably been 6 to 8 months of adding collagen. And my hair; nothing ever grew my hair. Seriously, nothing ever did. And I was just like; this is just the hair I’m going to have. And after I added collagen, my hair is so much thicker. It’s longer, it’s healthier, it’s crazy. And my nails grow a lot faster, too. Which I don’t love, because I have fake acrylic nails. So I have to get them done more often. But the hair part; and my hair. I have naturally blonde hair, so I have to get my hair done every three weeks, because my roots show, and I’m not into that look, of looking like I’m balding.

There was this forum once that I read online. There is this mean forum out on the internet that talks sh*t about blogs. And it was talking about me. I will never forget this forum. But it was talking bad about PaleOMG and how much they hate me. And there was one that was like, “She obviously doesn’t eat well because you can tell that she’s balding.” {laughs} I want to be like; I’m not balding! That’s just my blonde hair coming in, ok! It just looks like I’m balding! {laughs}

So now I have to get rid of that super fast because the collagen is making my hair grow a little bit faster. So roots are showing mighty fast. So loving the collagen. It has its pros and cons. But mostly pros. If you want longer hair. If you want thicker, longer nails. Highly recommend this stuff. And I use Great Lakes or Vital Proteins. I’ve used both of them. I usually use Vital Proteins when I’m at home, and then when I travel I just use the Great Lakes single packs. Because I can get them on Amazon Prime. And Amazon is taking over the world, and I’m supporting it! I wonder if Amazon is going to make Whole Foods prices lower. That would be pretty rad. Since I just bought pre-cut sweet potatoes for a million dollars.

Anyway. So I highly recommend getting collagen in your diet. And if you can get the single packs, I just add it into my coffee. I like to bring a little, what’s it called? Like handheld frother. And I can just mix my coffee with the collagen, so it doesn’t get clumpy. So I’m literally staring at it on my counter right now. My frother, my collagen packs, ready to pack into my luggage. And have my collagen on the go. On the sail boat! On the yacht!

I wonder what kind of yacht it is. I really have no idea about this trip. When my friends ask me on trips, I say yes. I don’t really ask questions. I don’t do a ton of research. I just hope that my friends aren’t assholes, and booked a good trip. So I’m just really trusting Vanessa here. So I don’t really know what the boat even looks like. But who cares. Who cares. I’m on a boat.

Ok. Another thing I have been loving. I think I’ve had this one before, but my love for them never ends. Is Express jeans. So if you are a person with bigger legs, or more muscular legs. Or you have a tiny waist and your legs are thicker than your waist, like most people I see out there. And you have a hard time buying jeans, because jeans are made for J. Crew mannequins. Well, not to worry. I’m here to tell you that you need to shop at Express in their denim section. I buy most of my jeans from Express online. I find that they have more size options online than in store most of the time. And I can find more of a selection, and it’s easier to kind of look through, online.

But anyway. Express jeans are life changing. They’re so stretchy. They have so many different washes and colors and distressed or not distressed. But they’re the best fitting jeans in the world. I cannot get enough of them. I’ve only had a few pairs that I’ve tried on and didn’t fit right. But almost everything; I usually buy size 2. Once in a great while I’ll buy a size 0. Their sizes definitely are; you should size down when you’re purchasing things. Because they run a little big, for sure. Because I don’t wear a 2 in anything, and I do in their clothes.

So they just have jeans that fit like no other. I’m just so in love with them. Every time I put their jeans on, I feel more comfortable in my skin. They just fit so well. So they have been my go-to for jeans for a couple of years now. I don’t know why I didn’t start shopping them earlier when I had issues with finding jeans. They’re just a life saver. A life saver, I tell you.

Another product, or company, that I’m loving is Tula face products. I told you; if you follow my blog at, I talked about Tula on my blog. And told you guys what products I love with them and what I’m using. And I actually just packed all of my; I’m walking back there right now. Walking through my house. I packed all of my Tula products in a little baggie they give you when you order any of their travel sized stuff. They give you this little travel sized bag. So I’m packing all of those. Setting them down by my suitcase as we speak. But they have travel size products and then just regular size products, as well. {dinging} Sweet potatoes are done.

So they have all kinds of different sizes and products. But I got a bunch of their travel size products recently just because I was going to travel all the time. And it’s so nice to be able to keep up on your products. It sucks when you leave and you’re like, ok I don’t feel like buying the little travel sized ones. You know, you go to Target to get stuff. It’s nice to have travel sized stuff already ready to go. So they have travel sized stuff that I’m keeping with me. So I’ve been loving Tula for night and day skin care.

And then another product I’m taking with me on this trip; and I actually just posted about it on my blog today. Is Super Goop. So Super Goop is a sunscreen company. And I was lucky enough to meet with them when I was at the reward style conference in April. I think I met with them on my birthday, actually. So I got to meet with the people kind of behind Super Goop, and talk with them, and what their goal was, and what their brand is all about. And they have amazing sun screen. They have a mousse sun screen that I love, because it gives you so much coverage in just a little squirt. Squirt is a gross word.

They also have a setting mist that I use for makeup. Like a makeup setting mist. I use that after I put my makeup on. And then they also have a, what’s it called? A setting powder. So I’ve been using the powder. Like if I get greasy at all. If my skin kind of gets oily whenever I’m wearing makeup. Or say you’re outside. I’ve been using that little setting powder. Oh, Jackson. Using that setting powder to just set my makeup, and get the grease away. It’s the best. Love those products. So Tula and Super Goop. {laughs} I almost said super poop. Super Goop are both really awesome products. Highly recommend them.

2. My Favorite Thing: Food [37:20]

Now, let’s talk about some food products. Because I just added spinach to my breakfast casserole. Cooking up some breakfast sausage, adding the spinach as we speak. So let’s talk about some food related products that I’ve been loving lately.

Let’s see. I’ve got to get my little list up. So first off, are Perfect Food bars. These are not paleo. Don’t f*cking come at me, ok. They’re not paleo. And they’re decent high in sugar; that’s why they taste so f*cking good. But I’m a person; I don’t believe in just eating a bar as a replacement meal. I don’t think you should be eating bars every day. But I am a person who likes to have a little bit of a snack before I workout. Or I like having some sort of bar on hand in my person for after a workout, and I have to coach, and I don’t have time to eat other food. Or I’m just traveling. And I don’t have time to eat something; I have something on hand.

So I don’t like bars as meal replacements or daily intake. But I think they’re great when you have better options of bars, just around, in general. So, I love, love, love their chocolate chip peanut butter. And then they have a dark chocolate almond one. The almond butter is really good. The peanut butter is really good. Really they have all kinds of different flavors, and they’re all so tasty, and really filling. And a lot of times, I’ll eat half a bar and just put it away. So if I’m going to go in for a workout. I do Orange Theory in the mornings, usually. So I will get half a bar in. It could be a Lara bar, an RX bar, or a Perfect Foods bar. Those are usually the three that I have on hand. I’ll have just half of a bar, just to get my stomach settled. And just have something in my stomach before I go. And then I can have that half a bar another day.

So it’s nice just having a little something on hand. And their bars I think are so tasty. And the people I’ve talked to at Perfect Food bar have always been really cool people. Which I love. Who doesn’t love cool people behind a cool product? Am I right? I am right.

Another one. Let’s stay with the food. The brand Terra chips. Terra started off, I believe, as root vegetable chips. That’s how I’ve always known Terra chips. But they’ve always used, I believe sunflower oil, in their chips. In their root vegetable chips. And they recently started using coconut oil. And they started making sweet potato; not sweet potato. But they do have those. But they started making plantain chips with coconut oil. So they have two different kinds of plantain chips. They have regular plantain chips and they have sweet plantain chips. So the riper ones.

I find the regular plantain chips; sorry, I keep saying sweet potato. I find the regular plantain chips a little bit too salty. And I love me some salt, believe me. But I find it just a tad salty. So I like to get the sweet plantain chips. I don’t find them to have as much salt in them. And they’re just super tasty. It’s just the perfect little snack. And they cook them in coconut oil, which is really cool. So I’m loving those chips. I just actually bought some for my husband so he can snack on that.

And of course, now we’re on the chips because I just bought these other chips for my husband too. Siete foods chips. Sorry, I’m trying to get dishes out without making a total breaking dish sound. So my husband and I both love Siete foods. If you haven’t tried their tortilla chips, they’re made with cassava. So they’re grain free tortilla chips. And they’re just so good. So addicting. So just be warned, they’re very addicting, and it’s hard to stop. It’s hard to put them down. Which is why I just purchased them when I’m heading out of town. So I can keep my life together. But they’re so dang good. And the family, I’ve talked about Siete foods. The family is just amazing, too. Which makes it even more fun to purchase their food, when you know the people behind it.

But if you haven’t tried Siete foods chips, they’re amazing. And if you’re like, “I live in Podunk, Nowhere.” Don’t worry; you can get them on Amazon, pumpkin! Amazon has everything, ok? When I doubt, go to Amazon. That should be a quote. I guess I just made it a quote.

And then, what else. Ohh, I have a drink one that I’m loving. Have you tried Spindrift? Spindrift is a sparkling water. But they use fresh fruit in it. So I’m going to actually go look in the fridge. I want to see how many calories are in this fridge. Oh my gosh. Our fridge; I don’t know if you can hear this terrible sound. But our fridge is about to break in our garage. It was here when we got here, so we don’t really care. But it’s about to explode. That motor is running hard.

Ok, so in their strawberry Spindrift, they have 9 calories, and it’s 1 gram of sugar. So the only thing it has in it is sparkling water, strawberry puree, and fresh lime juice. How cool is that? Those are all of the ingredients. And they have a ton of different flavors. They have cucumber, they have raspberry, they have grape. I just pulled the strawberry one out because I’m going to drink that down. But yeah, it’s like the perfect little summer drink to have. So you can mix it into cocktails. You can have it by itself. I like it when I’m just like; “I just don’t want another bottle of water. I need something else.” I have one of those on hand. And they’re just a nice treat.

I’ve heard other people, they’re like, “They don’t taste very good.” I think people expect these to be sweet. But they have no added sugar. So when you’re just mashing up fruit, it’s not going to give off; and they’re not using a ton of fruit, obviously. It’s not going to give off a ton of sweetness. So if you’re looking for a sh*tty sugar-filled pop, well you’re not going to get that. It’s just nice, refreshing, it has some flavor to it, but it’s not super sugary. You can always add your own sugar to anything. So if you’re like, f*ck this. Here’s some stevia. Boom. If you’re like, no, I’m not into no calorie. Add some honey. Do you, baby boo. Ok? But don’t expect it to be a pop, because it’s not. And pop is gross. Do you drink pop? Do you? You shouldn’t. It’s disgusting. Such a judgey b*tch over here.

Another thing that just opened by our house that I’m super into. Because we’ve just never really had many of these things around. Is a new poke restaurant popped up. I feel like poke is really popular in Hawaii. We don’t have it much over here. Especially because we’re a land-locked state. So getting fresh fish over is a little bit harder, so I don’t trust many places for it. So I go to my sushi place in town. They fly in fish daily. And I trust this place too. They have wild-caught.

So, I get a poke bowl with white rice. And they have gluten-free soy sauce there, so add that on. And then they do wild-caught tuna or salmon. And you can get that. And it’s raw. Add that in. And you can add a bunch of toppings to it. So I add like cucumber, they have mango, tomatoes, green onion, cilantro, seaweed. They just have a sh*t ton of stuff. So I’ll just add in everything. And then at home, a lot I’ll add either coconut aminos if I’m not into the gluten free soy sauce. Or I’ll add a siracha mayo into that. Loving it. Siracha mayo is the bomb. Am I right? I’m 100% right. Loving that.

So I told my husband, when I’m gone, Poke City is right around the corner, my little pumpkin bun. Just go get it! Just go pick it up! Go live the good life. And he’s like, those are expensive. I’m like, just eat food, ok. I don’t care. I don’t care. We never put our money together. Just because we’ve been too lazy. Sorry, I’m spraying some coconut oil in a pan. I don’t know what you can hear and what you can’t hear. It’s going to be back to one of my first episodes when Jackson was chewing a bone, and everybody gave me the worst reviews. Anyways. Sh*t, what was I talking about? Poop in a shoe. I lost it. I lost it. I could rewind and listen, but b*tch ain’t got time for that. That’s just what I’m going to say this whole podcast. B*tch ain’t got time for that. Just making this egg casserole for the hubs.

3. My Favorite Things: Travel [46:47]

So another thing I’ve been loving, since I’ve been trying to add more travel to the blog and to my own life. I’ve been heading to more places and trying to find places that I want to travel to. And I’ve been just kind of sticking within the US. But I’m hoping to get into a little bit more international travel as I go. I have a trip to Boise, Idaho in a few weeks. Once I get back into town from this trip. I have a quick break at home, and then I go to Boise. So it’s been fun seeing what other people add to their travel. So I’ve started following two travel bloggers. I may have talked about them on the podcast before because I just love both of them. They’re really fun to watch. They’re just really cool, amazing women. Obviously, I don’t know them personally {laughs}. But they’re just really inspiring women. And they just f*cking conquer everything, their own business. And they’re badass chicks.

One woman is Leslie Ann Murphy. If you watch the Bachelor, because you should. She was on; I forget whose season she was on. Maybe Ben Higgins? I forget. But she did not win. I think it was Ben Higgins. She did not win. I don’t know how far she made it. But I think after she finished that filming, maybe she started traveling. And she became a full-time travel blogger. And I’ve listened to a podcast or two with her on it.

And she recently, she had the gene that predisposes you to probably have breast cancer. So it’s like, Angelina Jolie talked about this. And she got a mastectomy because of it. So this girl, Leslie Ann Murphy, when through the same experience. And she documents her entire experience of getting a mastectomy. And recently she just got implants. And just talking about the whole process of it all. I could even be saying things wrong, because I’ve never been through this myself or know anything about it. But she’s really cool. And she just continues to travel.

So she recently just had the breast augmentation surgery. And then she was in Aruba. And I think she was just in Breckenridge. It’s just so fun to follow along on her Instagram stories. And she has stunning photos along the way. And I just, you know, I just want to hop on a plane with her, and be like, “Show me your ways. Show me your badass travel ways.” Love reading her blog too. It’s a beautiful blog. I really like it. So if you can, check out her.

And then one other travel blogger who probably has the best photos of all is My Life’s A Travel Movie. Alyssa Ramos. So she, I think she’s in Bali right now. I follow her on Instagram stories all the time. Because it’s so fun. Because she’s like, “oh, here I am in Bali. And this is my apartment for the next two weeks. And it’s like $26 a night.” And it’s a super cute little apartment. And she has a pool. Then she shows grocery shopping, and how much money she spends on what. Then she takes stunning photos. She just crushes the photo game. She does a ton of wide-angle shots. I’m looking at her photos right now, and am just obsessed. Like, f*ck she goes to cool places.

But she talks a lot about how it’s cheaper to travel around the world than it is to pay for an apartment in LA. So that’s pretty badass. And she just runs her business. I think her blog is her fulltime business. So pretty cool. So I highly recommend those two travel bloggers that I just adore. And they just keep me completely inspired. I want to do cooler things because of them. That’s a pretty cool job, to inspire others to just do cool stuff. So cool.

I think I only have one last thing to talk about. I’m trying to look around the house to see if there’s any other stuff that I’ve been loving lately. Obviously, the Nordstrom anniversary sale, because that’s the best time of year. It’s like Christmas. And something I’ve been loving since I’ve been traveling. Since we’re kind of on the traveling topic anyway, is my Delsey luggage. So honestly, just hard back. I don’t know if that’s what it’s called. But hard luggage. So; (pulling the sweet potatoes out.)

So any hard case luggage. I guess hard back is not a word. But hard case luggage I think everybody should have. Like, it is such a life saver. I see all these people with their luggage that’s been totally smashed in the process of going through all the baggage claim. And I recently, I got Delsey a few months ago. And I got a huge one for my checked bag, and I have a little one for carry on. And what I love about hard case is it always fits overhead. Because you know when you have those fabric ones that stretch, and you’ll just keep putting sh*t into it, and then you can’t fit it in the overhead bin space, and you’re like shoving it, and everybody’s staring at you, and it’s really embarrassing. Not a fan of that, no.

So with the hardback, it’s like you sit on it. You shut that sh*t. And it stays the same size. (Sweet potatoes aren’t done.) It stays the same size. You put it up overhead. No embarrassing moments. Love it. Love my hard case. If you don’t have hard case suitcase, I highly recommend them. And they weren’t crazy expensive. I mean, I went. I forget where I was. I was looking in some store. And it was like, $800 for a carryon. I was like, go f*ck yourself. No. No. Who pays that? Not me. I think I paid, I got it on Amazon, and I think I paid maybe $150 for a carryon. And $250 for my huge one; like huge! Maybe a little bit more. But compared to what I found in the store, so much cheaper. Love them. They’re more affordable on the suitcase size.

Yeah, that’s all I got for you I think. I think so. What else. Is there anything else? I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t think so. But you know what; I hope this podcast gave you some new ideas for your own pantry. Or your own clothing. Or whatever else, you know. Your beautiful face of yours. Jackson says hello, from the carpet, chewing on 6 bones at the same time. And now I’m going to hop on Instagram stories and talk about how I make these casseroles. So you won’t be hearing this until 2 days later. But follow along on Instagram stories. I’m hoping to get a couple of photos up on my Instagram stories the day when we’re traveling. I’m trying not to be on my phone that much, because then I just get a little wrapped up in answering questions, and then not taking a full vacation. So follow along on Instagram stories. And I’ll be posting some new swimsuits if you need some swimwear ideas. And I’m hoping to also post workouts that I’m programing on the beach.

So I bought some exercise bands, the Go-Fit brand from Target. I just bought exercise bands and I’m going to program some workouts that we can do that will just be like running, and doing the exercise bands, and body weight stuff. So we can stay in shape while we’re on this trip. So I’ll post those as I do them, as well. So stay tuned for that.

I hope you guys have a wonderful week. Thanks for listening to the podcast. As always, you’re a real gem. You’re a real best friend, you know? Not like my other best friends who don’t listen to this podcast. You’re a real good best friend. Ok, I’ve got to go. I’ve got to do the damn thing. Don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe. I don’t really know what it does. But I hear all the other podcasters say it. So I’m just following the trend. And have a great weekend. I’ll talk to you soon. Come over to I have new recipes up there. Some new outfits. Some new workouts. Some new stuff. I’m actually having a Denver series post coming up of places to stay in Denver, if you’re thinking about travel. So come over, travel stuff. All kinds of jazz. And I’ll talk to you soon, guys. If you don’t hear a podcast next week, it’s because I’m on f*cking vacation. But I may record one. You never know. You never know what you want to do on vacation. Until next time, my friends. I don’t know how to say goodbye. Love you. ‘K, bye!

Chatting about all of my favorite things as of late while I run errands and cook for my husband before I leave for the Caribbean. It’s all about multitasking on this episode! Tinkle Face Razors Mind Pump Podcast Collagen Single […] Chatting about all of my favorite things as of late while I run errands and cook for my husband before I leave for the Caribbean. It’s all about multitasking on this episode! Tinkle Face Razors Mind Pump Podcast Collagen Single […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 56:24
How To Get Started w/ Paleo – Episode 45: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 29 Jul 2017 13:43:06 +0000 24 I get an email or two every month with someone asking where to start when it comes to eating paleo, so I thought it would be perfect for talking through on a podcast! Starting paleo can feel pretty daunting, but […] I get an email or two every month with someone asking where to start when it comes to eating paleo, so I thought it would be perfect for talking through on a podcast! Starting paleo can feel pretty daunting, but I promise you that it gets easier and easier over time!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 45 Transcription!

1. The Bachelorette [17:11]
2. What the Health [21:21]
3. Juli’s paleo journey [25:05]
4. Cleaning out the pantry [30:17]
5. Trying new recipes [34:45]
6. Don’t try to be paleo perfect [37:32]
7. Getting your family on board [40:26]
8. Paleo challenges [46:34]
9. Keto [50:07]
10. Macros [51:43]
11. Intermittent fasting [54:14]
12. Alcohol [58:13]

Juli Bauer: Hello pumpkin. Welcome to the 45th episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. My name is Juli Bauer Roth, and I am the creator of I feel like I should introduce myself every episode, but I always forget. So if you’re starting from here, it’s your lucky day. If you started from any of the other probably 42 episodes out there, then you don’t know who the hell is speaking to you. But today, I’m here for you. That’s where I came from. This is where I am now. While I was on book tour, a woman asked me to start a podcast, and I did it. So she better f*cking listen. She was like, oh yeah it will be fun to listen to Juli! And then I started a podcast, and she was like, what the f*ck is she talking about?

But you know what, every week is different. I like to change it up on you guys. Sometimes, I like to talk about weird sexual encounters with my girlfriends, and other times I like to talk about paleo. Don’t let the PaleOMG part of my name throw you off. There’s all kinds of different information here on this podcast. But today it’s just me by my lonesome.

Last week, I was in Austin. Which is why I recorded with three of my closest girlfriends, who are all bloggers, as well. And we talked about nothing of importance, but it was wonderful. Because who doesn’t like just chatting with girlfriends. It’s not really fun listening to people chatting with girlfriends, but it was for us. It was good for us.

So I was in Austin last week. The amazing people behind Siete Foods, which is a grain free tortilla and tortilla chip company. And I’m hoping they expand to 20-hundred other items on their list. Because they have the best tortillas and the best tortilla chips out there. So addictive. And they’re totally grain free. They’re not filled with weird sh*t. Or fillers. Or if you have issues with corn, they don’t use corn. So it’s just really rad.

So anyways. They brought us out to Austin, and got us in an AirBNB. And it was a thank you for always supporting them. They’re just such an awesome family. It’s a family-run business. They f*cking rock. They live in Austin, which I’m jealous of. Except it was 4 million degrees there. And we had all these big plans of doing things, and then it was just too hot to do any of them. So all we did was eat until we were uncomfortable, and then sit and talk about business. Which is wonderful. Because none of us; Lexi, because she’s on the East Coast, she has a few more friends who are in the blogging arena. But the rest of us, we’re kind of on the outside. I don’t have a ton of friends, especially in my specific business. I know some in the fashion. I know some strict in paleo. But I don’t hang out with them regularly. So it’s nice to talk to close girlfriends who are open about their business. So we can talk about how each other are making money, and what has worked, and what company has worked, and what has failed. What ambitions we have in the future with a judge-free zone.

Because I don’t know about you listening, but a lot of people think that being a blogger is not a job. Because so many people call themselves bloggers. And I don’t know; I don’t know what other people make as an income when they say they’re bloggers. But this is my full time job. And it’s something I do 24/7. I’m literally figuring out how to get a hotspot on my phone so I can keep up my blog while I’m in the Caribbean nest week for 9 days. So it’s a full time job, and as soon as you slack, you don’t make as much money. It’s not like a salary coming in and it’s just set in stone. This is completely up in the air.

So anyway, it’s nice talking to someone who understands that, and gets the work that you’re putting into your daily job every day. So it was super fun hanging out with them. But we probably gained 10 pounds each, because we just were eating our faces off. And then you’re retaining so much water. So it was nice to come back. We were all like, we should cut this one day shorter because we probably wouldn’t have retained 50 pounds of water. But it was awesome. It was so much fun going to Austin. And it just felt good to get back. Because I leave out of town next week for the Caribbean. So I have about a week and a half in between trips to recuperate and get a bunch of work done before I leave.

And in between that. So I got home from Austin and then pretty much picked right up into this little filming gig. Not; I don’t know how to explain it. But this company called Well and Good, you might have seen them. They contacted me about doing a city guide to Denver for dog-friendly spots. Because obviously Jackson is a motherf*cking superstar. And he should be on every billboard and every TV screen and every movie screen everywhere. Modern Family French bulldog? No. Jackson? Yes. Except that dog is much more well behaved and rolls over on cue. Jackson’s not quite there yet. But man. Can he sweet talk a lady. Or even a fella.

Pretty sure my takes him around, walks him in parks to pick up dudes. Which is pretty rad. I’m hoping it works. Hot guys out there, in Denver, who are successful and super cool and don’t drink too much, but enough that you can hang and you can hold a good conversation. Please email me. I’d love to set you up with my friend. But any of the other rest; don’t contact me. What am I talking about? No dudes listen to this podcast. But that’s fine. I’m just still putting it out there.

So anyways. I worked with Well and Good for two days straight on a video, Denver Guide for Dog Friendly Spots. So I took them around to my 5 favorite spots around Denver that are dog friendly. And that I love the most. So my favorite Denver spots. And we filmed it all. And it was just so much fun. They filmed Jackson on the ground, and a camera right next to him. Low to the ground. So you could see his little prancing feet. And then he went in the water. He went in different fountains.

And he went to a dog park where he had really bad anxiety because all the dogs. Probably because it smells like piss in the dog park, and he was like. “Hey, this is gross. I’m very low to the ground. Get me out of here.” I don’t know. But he gets really bad anxiety at dog parks. And it’s so weird. We took him to a dog park all the time as a puppy and he f*cking loved it. So I don’t know where that social anxiety came from. Probably from his mother, since I have social anxiety. It just comes off.

And a child tried to pet his face, and he was not into it. Kind of did the nip thing. I was like, hey kid. You know when kids ask you if they can pet your dog, they don’t listen for an answer and then they go face deep? What parent hasn’t taught them to not do that? That’s not a good idea. My dog was not into that. Luckily he didn’t bite, but he was ready. He was uncomfortable with the situation. That’s for sure.

But everything else, he was a gem. He did everything we needed to. He would get up on a bench. He would walk the other way. He never really stopped, until the end of day 2. Because he was exhausted. We were in the sun most of the days. And if you don’t own a smooshed faced dog, you don’t know that your dog has to be out of the sun pretty much all the time. Jackson can only take heat for a short amount of time. And then he can’t breathe, and his heart will explode. So that’s not going to work. So at the end of day two, of filming two days straight and walking everywhere and him just being out in the heat and exhausted, he was not having it anymore. And he was breathing so fast. He was like {panting}. I don’t even know if you can hear that.

But he was breathing crazy fast, and I was freaking out. And I couldn’t find the producer, but we were done filming. I felt like such a b*tch. I just peaced out. I didn’t even say goodbye, thank you. I didn’t get to do any common courtesy nice things. I was literally like, my dog is going to die, I have to get in the car. So I threw water on him, picked him up, put him in the passenger side of the car in the feet, so the air conditioning could be blasting on him. And he turned belly up towards the air conditioning. It was so sad. I had a major freak-out moment. If you own a smooshed faced dog, you totally get it.

But I felt like such a b*tch. I just peaced out on that director. I was like, hey. No time to say bye after getting to know you for two days. I’ve got to make sure my dog doesn’t die. Such a b*tch move. But I cannot wait for this video to come out. Because the two camera guys that were here, they filmed at my house and then they filmed around Denver. And they were f*cking awesome. They were just so cool. Such nice people. And they were so nice to Jackson. And they showed me a still from one of the videos. And Jackson’s sitting on my lap, and I’m blurry, and I’m smiling. And Jackson has his head tilted, and he’s smiling. And I’m going to blow it up into an entire wall photo, at least 20 feet by 20 feet, and I’m going to put it on my wall. I’m so obsessed with him. I just love him so much. I get why people love their kids. But man, dogs just love you so much. Like Jackson right now, he’s not annoying me. He’s just chewing on his bone. And he’s like, hey mom. Thanks for giving me a bone. I love you. F*ck I love him so much.

So anyways. I got back from Austin and had to film that right away. And now it’s just been getting everything ready to go for this upcoming trip. So I’m just trying to get all my blog posts done. And get caught up. So everything is in its place ready to post on time. And I don’t skip a beat.

So the other thing that was happening over at my house. And I think I might have talked about this on the podcast. Is our couches in our backyard. So in our backyard. If you watch my Instagram stories, I kind of show it sometimes. But in our backyard, we have this little brick spot that we laid out that we wanted to put couches and a little hangout area. So we find these f*cking awesome couches online. And they’re called Design Furnishings. So they’re amazing couches, and they’re really not that crazy expensive. So we ordered these couches. We get a confirmation email, pretty much to be like, hey we charged your card. And then nothing on tracking. And I’m just so used to Nordstrom and Revolve and Amazon. And they give you pretty much minute to minute updates about when you’re going to get your package. So sorry for me for having belief in the world. But, I didn’t get any tracking email.

And so I finally log on to this freight company that brings the couches over from California. And it says they’ve tried to contact me about setting an appointment. I’m like, ok that’s a f*cking flat out lie, but whatever. So I call them. And I set an appointment. And I was out of town when the appointment was supposed to be, so my sister-in-law stayed at the house, because my husband was working. So my sister-in-law stayed at the house for 5 hours. No show. No call. Nothing. And then of course it’s Saturday so nobody’s answering, because no one is working there today. I’m working on a Saturday. Are they? No.

Anyways. I call back Monday and I keep getting transferred. I’m on hold for like 40 minutes. And I finally get a hold of this woman. And she’s like, “Yeah, when can I set your appointment.” And I was like, no, no, no. I already set my appointment. And course I’m lying here. I’m like, I sat home for 5 hours on Saturday waiting for this package to appear and it never did. And she’s like, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, we don’t have any appointment in the system.” And I was like, so who did I talk to then? And she’s like, “I don’t know, you probably didn’t call this number.” I was like, oh I 100% called this same number. I literally pushed call back, ok. I don’t get snippy on the phone because I understand that it’s not customer services fault whatsoever. It’s not their fault, and what’s the point in being rude? It gets you nowhere. But I’m at my wits end at this point.

I’m like, I need these couches today. She’s like; and her name is Barb. Barb was like, “honey you ordered something from the internet. I don’t know what you expect.” I’m like, what the f*ck, Barb? I’ve ordered stuff from a sketchy site in China and I’ve gotten it quicker than this package in California. What the f*ck. I get it. It’s big four pieces. So she’s like, let me set a new appointment. And I’m pissed off. I’m like, how do I know this appointment is going to happen? How? She was like, “I don’t know what to tell you.” And I’m like, I don’t know what to say either. I’m just going to set this appointment and hope it does.

So the appointment comes along. And I’m filming that day, so I’m like, husband. You need to be home between this time. And I call him. And I’m like, hey the guy just called and said he’s going to be there in 15 minutes are you home. And he’s like, no I’m not home. I’m like, what the f*ck, what you mean you’re not home? I’m starting to get some bad anger here. Because if these couches don’t come, I’m not sitting on hold for 45 more minutes and talking to Barb again. Barb and I had a tiff. We worked it out towards the end. We got each other. She felt me. We felt it out.

But anyways. My husband got home in time. We got the couches. They’re sitting in the backyard. {laughs} and now we’re like, we need two more cushions. Two more little chairs to make it just a little bit bigger. {laughs} Which means we have to order again from that same site.

So here’s the thing. Design Furnishings and Road Runner Freight company both suck ass. But, the furniture is beautiful. Ok. Just putting that out there. You know, you can say a negative, but you sandwich it with a positive. It’s an open-faced sandwich here. So that’s what’s been going on here. I know that’s not interesting at all. But it was quite the life dilemma. When you’re trying to get work done and you’re on hold for 45 minutes. This is why I don’t get my health insurance or my car insurance dealt with. I have health insurance and car insurance. But if I need to go to the doctor, or I need to get my windshield replaced, I just ignore it. I just ignore. I don’t want to be on the phone for 45 minutes. I don’t care. No, I do care. I don’t want to get pregnant. I need to go to the doctor. Don’t worry, figuring it out. Step by step.

So next week, I go to the Caribbean. And I’m so pumped. Vanessa was on my podcast last week, and she is one of the girls that I’m going on this Caribbean trip with. So she had this trip booked last year with a group of people, and a couple broke up and opened up their spots for someone else. So she asked me. My sister-in-law is coming with me. And we island hop from; I honestly have no idea. It’s like St. Martin, and then St. Vincent, and three or four other islands that I’ve never heard of. And we just island hop and we hang out on this yacht. And it sounds like the coolest trip ever. And she loved it. And we get to paddleboard and just, I don’t know. Do island stuff. I’m taking a floatie with me so I can just float. Float everywhere I go. God I can’t wait.

And they cook for you on the boat, too. So they cook all your meals and a snack. And they make your drinks. It’s just rad. Just cannot wait. So it’s going to be a wonderful little vacation. Hopefully I can kind of turn off from social media a bit. But, that’s tough when it’s your job. You know what I’m saying? Oh hi doggie. It’s good to see you.

1. The Bachelorette [17:11]

Ok, let’s get quick recap on the extra boring stuff happening on; oh my god. Jackson literally just put his ass in my face. Don’t worry Jackson, it’s totes cool. So let’s talk about the Bachelorette. Because this show has gotten out of control boring. Like, what the f*ck is happening. What’s happening. The only thing that was exciting about this entire episode of 2 hours was when they went to HG Supply in Dallas. Which is one of my all-time favorite restaurants. They have a magnificent beet margarita. It’s so good. I want to go back specifically for that. It’s so freaking good. They have really good curry, too. And really good everything.

Anyways. That was pretty cool to see them. Congratulations for making it on a very highly watched show, HG Supply. Started by CrossFitters. They have a gym next door. I just love them. I love them so much. I think I met one of the owners one time, and he is a very attractive man. I don’t know if he was the owner. I don’t know who he was. I just remember a very attractive man introducing himself one day, years ago. Some things you remember, you know. Like curry and hot dudes.

So, what happens is all the dudes meet the family, because Rachel’s sister is about to pop. She’s pregnant and she’s wearing the biggest shirts I’ve ever seen. It’s so weird. She’s not like a big pregnant person, and she’s wearing shirts that are quadruple her size. With very puffy sleeves. And I love me a shoulder pad, don’t get me wrong. I will wear shoulder pads at any occasion, and I adore them. I wore them all the time in college when I was out to the bars and wearing skirts that barely covered my ass cheeks. They all had shoulder pads. F*cking into it.

So, anyways. All the guys meet the parents. And it’s just super awkward and not fun. I don’t even really want to do a recap. And everybody who hates my recaps is like, yeah. Go over it. But anyways. She is so in love with Bryan, and it’s so obvious she’s going to pick Bryan. And Bryan is the dude that you were like, “Oh my god, I’m totally in love with this guy.” When you were in college. Because you think he’s the greatest guy ever. And then he turns out to be a complete player. And, Bryan is in love with his mother. Bryan’s mom is in love with him, so it works out. So, they should move somewhere where you can marry your mother, and all is well. That’s how it should be.

But I think the only thing that really happened, she has an overnight with Peter. And they make it look like they did it. Don’t care if they did or not. Go you, Rachel. Do all the dudes you want to do. And then she has this overnight with Peter, and it stops to be continued, and she’s like {laughs}. So Peter is 100% not into her. And she’s like, “I want to get married.” And Peter was like, “I’m not going to ask you to marry me.” And she’s like, “I don’t know what to do.” And he’s like, “Don’t know. Don’t care.” Literally, Peter doesn’t care about anything, and he is like talking to a brick wall. So, it ends up to be continued.

So who’s going to be the next bachelor? And when is; I’m pretty sure the Bachelorette finale is going to be when I’m in the Caribbean, so that’s devastating. And luckily when I get back, the Bachelor in Paradise starts, and I cannot wait. It will be such a sh*t show. And that is what summer is all about. Watching other people be sh*t shows. So that’s that.

2. What the Health [21:21]

Before we talk about how to begin and how to eat paleo, how to really start it off, I want to talk about What the Health real quick. Because I keep getting questions. And I don’t have answers for you. What the Health is a new documentary made and created by very intense vegans. I don’t give a sh*t if you’re a vegetarian, if you’re a vegan, if you only eat fruit. I just heard about breatharians, where they don’t really eat, they just believe in the power of breathing as their food. I don’t care what you f*cking do. You can eat however you want. Ok.

But I hate when people try to spin things and make it seem like all meat is causing cancer and it’s causing all these health issues. That is what these vegans are out to do. And I have not watched the documentary, because I do not care what these crazy, crazy vegans. I’m not saying they’re crazy because they’re vegan; I’m saying they’re crazy vegans. Are trying to say about people who eat meat. And whatever else. I don’t care what they have to say. I don’t care how they spin it. I don’t care how you pull f*cking statistics out of your ass and spin them a certain way and interview certain people. I don’t care about that. I’ve seen plenty of different documentaries like that. It feels very conspiracy theory style. And I’m into a f*cking good conspiracy theory. I love hearing that sh*t. But, I also don’t let it take over my mind like I did when I was a college kid and my brain was a goo ball.

I just remember what our ancestors ate, and I go back to the knowledge that I’ve been given, and what we ate way back when. And how we thrive. And how our body thrives the most. But I am completely respectful to people who do not eat that way and do not want to eat that way. I don’t care. So you can listen to this podcast, and you can be freaked out and be scared to eat anything, and eat meat, and whatever else. But you can also do some of your research. I would highly recommend Robb Wolf. He is one of my favorite people who I’ll talk about in a second in this podcast. But when it comes to paleo and amazing scientific information out there, he watched the documentary and then he did a breakdown on his blog talking about different points and really analyzing it.

So I would talk to a person who that’s their specialty. Meaning, talk to them by reading their blog. If you just go to Robb Wolf, and you type in What the Health, that blog post will come up, and he talks about it there. I don’t have a stance on it. I will not be watching it. I don’t care to watch it. But I thought I would just talk over it real quick of just what I thought in general. Because I just don’t care. I’ve listened to these kinds of people so many times in my life. And I’ve seen documentaries like this many times. Do your research about the people who are putting together certain information, as well. And their viewpoints. How that can alter the outcome of a movie. So that’s that. That’s what I think about that. Robb Wolf. What the Health. He has a breakdown of it that’s super helpful.

3. Juli’s paleo journey [25:05]

Ok. Ok. Let’s talk about paleo. Because that’s where this whole blog, now podcast, even started from. I’ve got to hydrate ok. Hydrating. So, I’m going to do a quick recap about myself. I’ve talked about this on the blog before, so I’m sorry if I’m repeating myself in any way. I’m not trying to be an asshole. I’m not trying to annoy you. I’m just giving you a little background real quick.

So I ate super unhealthy my whole life. It was Little Debbie snack cakes. Chips with fake cheese on top. Funyuns. Sandwiches from 7-11. McDonald’s. Taco Bell. Subway. I ate sh*t all the time. Never ate healthy. I didn’t know what healthy meant. When I thought of healthy, I thought of; I don’t know. What’s that brand called? The Super K challenge? I don’t know what it’s called. I thought healthy was low calorie, low fat. That’s what I saw. I saw these little gimmicks on TV, and how to lose 10 pounds in 10 days. And I tried all that sh*t. And I starved myself. I binged. I tried to be bulimic; bullsh*t, bullsh*t, bullsh*t. Whatever. Normal, I think a lot of teenage behavior out there. I think many of us, most of us, have gone through some sort of sh*t like that. Counting calories. Restricting calories, working out excessively. I did it all.

So I was in college. I met a guy at the time who was my college boyfriend. He was shredded. I wanted to look like him. I found out about CrossFit. He was doing CrossFit at the time. I tried my first 10 burpees. I said I’m never f*cking doing this again. And then I was like, ok. I’m going to f*cking do this, on my own. I slowly started getting more in shape. And I started to see my body change. But I knew I needed to get my diet in check. So with him, I would. Eww Jackson, don’t choke. He’s choking on some bone marrow, bro.

So with him, he was shredded, and I would see his meals. And his meals would be like weighed out. He would have chicken, he would have broccoli, and he’d have olives. And he would count his olives, and he would weigh out his chicken and his broccoli. And I was like, what is this? So he told me about the diet he was following at that time. And that was the Zone Diet. So if you don’t know the Zone Diet, it’s kind of like Weight Watchers. Sorry, I’ve got to give Jackson some water. Sorry for the sounds. It’s kind of like Weight Watchers where they have points; Zone has blocks. So you are pretty much; or maybe like macros. I’ve never followed macros. So it’s kind of like figuring out how much food do you need, and it’s portion control more than anything. So you’re figuring out how much fat you need, how much carbs, and how much protein, and you’re eating that. With the Zone Diet, you’re still able to eat like bread and really whatever you want still.

So I started Zone. And I saw a huge improvement with my weight. I lost a good amount of weight. And then I was cutting out grains more and more. Because I started reading about the paleo diet. I had Loren Cordain, who wrote the Paleo Diet book, I had him as a professor in college. And, my dad was very, very ill in high school. He gained a bunch of weight because he was put on steroids. And he started the paleo diet to regain his health and lose weight. So I had heard about the paleo diet many times. And I started reading more into it. And more about what grains do to our body, and why we don’t need them. And a little bit about dairy. So I was like, maybe I should try this paleo thing.

So for me, changing my diet was very, very hard. For me now, it’s like, “oh no, it’s easy.” Back then, that was very hard. Telling me I couldn’t have a sandwich, or cookies, or pasta, or any of the bullsh*t that we think we need in our diet. I was like, there’s no f*cking way I can do that. There’s no way. And so paleo was very step by step for me.

I remember having lunch every day. I’d make a tuna sandwich. And before I would have two pieces of bread. And then I went to one piece of bread. So I had an open-faced sandwich. And I removed cereal from my diet. So I went to oats. And then I was like, ok I can’t have oats. What can I have? I still want sweet in the morning. So I made myself a smoothie. So it was a very step by step process. It was not easy for me. Changing my diet was not easy. It was scary to me. Changing my diet was very scary.

4. Cleaning out the pantry [30:17]

There you go doggie. So, very slowly. It probably took me 9 months to a year to really change over to full paleo. And how I did that was I got rid of sh*t in my house. So when people ask how to change over to paleo, I tell them first of all you need to clean out your pantry. You need to clean out your fridge, your freezer, and you need to get the sh*t out. Donate it, throw it away, whatever you need to do. You need to get it out of your house.

So packaged food. I mean, go look at the ingredients of a Cheese-It. Or some sort of cracker. There’s a huge list of ingredients. Many of which you maybe can’t pronounce, or you absolutely don’t know what those ingredients are. Why are you eating them? Think about that. Why are you eating something you don’t understand what it is, you know? If we went to somewhere else, and you read something on a menu, and you don’t know what it is, you’re probably a little bit hesitant about eating it. But they can explain its whatever, whatever. But you might not be able to get an explanation of what’s in a Cheese-It cracker. I don’t know about Cheese-Its. I’m not trying to put them on blast. I’m just saying, in general, when you look at a package.

So get the sh*t out. Get ingredients out that you don’t want in the house, and you know you shouldn’t be eating. And that’s going to be packaged foods. That’s going to be a lot of condiments that you probably have. A lot have high fructose corn syrup in them. They have corn starch. They have a sh*t ton of sugars in them. Weird sugars. They have weird other preservatives. Get that stuff out of the house. Nowadays it is so much easier to be paleo or to be gluten free. So much easier. When I started 7 years ago, there was maybe one condiment out there. And it was a sh*tty ketchup. Now there’s like four or five brands that make a ketchup, and barbecue sauce, and ranch dressing, and mayo. Back then, you had to make those all on your own. And that’s why I started a blog in the first place.

So cleaning out the sh*t is what’s important. Because nowadays, you can fill that with new products, and you can find new spices. A lot of spice blends that you’ll find in grocery stores have corn starch in them, and they have weird other preservatives. You want to get away from that. So it’s a learning curve. And it’s overwhelming. I get it. But you don’t have to take it as that. You can say, ok. This month I’m going to clean out my pantry. Get rid of this sh*t. And I’m just going to start with some of the basics. And you can get maybe a couple of spices. And the next month you can get a couple of more spices. You don’t have to get everything all at once, and say paleo is so f*cking expensive.

When I first started paleo, I was out of college. I was making $17,000 a year. I was paying rent. I was paying my bills. And I was still eating paleo. I didn’t have grass-fed, grass finished meat. I didn’t have organic veggies. I didn’t have all these condiments and all these other. Well they didn’t really have that back then. But I didn’t have all this fancy stuff. I made paleo work on a very strict budget. And I have a podcast on paleo on a budget and how to make it work. And I still was able to eat paleo.

So you don’t have to see it as this crazy expensive adventure. Not even a fun adventure. It seems so overwhelming. But if you’re like, ok. I’m just going to clean out the pantry. I’m going to get meat, fruits and veggies, and I’m going to get some nuts and seeds, and I’m going to get some new cooking oils. I’ll get a couple of spices. Garlic powder. Salt. Pepper. Boom. Done. Then the next month, you’re like. Ok. I’m going to add a little bit more spices, because maybe I felt bored this month. So I’m going to get Primal Palate. Those are a great spice blend. I’m going to get Primal Palate spice blends. They come in a three pack. Or you can buy individual ones. And you can get new spices, and try some new spices, and add a little more flavor to your routine. And then you can start cooking more recipes.

5. Trying new recipes [34:45]

So, trying recipes online. So after you’ve cleaned out your pantry, you get rid of the sh*t. That’s when you’ve got to start cooking for yourself. Sure, there are paleo meal delivery services, and there are whatever those ones where they send you your meal that you cook in the measured out ingredients. You can do that too. A lot of those places have paleo. But I think if you want to stick with something long term, making food for yourself is very important. So the more you cook for yourself, the more you understand where food is coming from, and why it tastes a certain way. And why you didn’t like it another way. And the better you get at getting to know your food, and what makes your body feel the best.

So then when you go out to restaurants, and you eat sh*t that you don’t normally eat, you’re like, you know what? This doesn’t feel good. And I don’t want to do this as much. So that’s the best way. You grocery shop. You clean out sh*t. And you have stuff readily available. If you have food ready available, you will feel like paleo is much, much easier.

And here’s the thing. You’re going to have to grocery shop more. Because you eat food. And if you don’t eat it, it goes bad. Because it’s not filled with preservatives. Like formaldehyde. I don’t know what’s in it, that weird sh*t that preserves food. Do you want that in your body? No. So food goes back if you don’t use it. Or you just have to eat it quicker. So you have to go to the grocery store a little bit more. And I know that sucks, but that’s life. That’s just how it goes. I’m sorry, but that’s how it goes.

So cleaning out your pantry, and getting rid of the sh*t, and adding in simple food is what’s going to get you to that next step of paleo. I know it feels so overwhelming, but it’s really not when you’re just cleaning out and getting fresh food. For fresh food, they say this all the time, but staying on the outside of the grocery store. So that’s going to take you around the meat section, the fruits and vegetables. Everything fresh is going to be on the outside. And then sure, you might need to go to the middle for some vinegars and some olive oil. Stuff like that. But you won’t need to go in the middle that much once you get this down. You’ll find that.

So if you need any grocery store staples, I have this information in all three of my cookbooks that are available on Amazon. I talk about grocery store staples. And how to just start up with paleo a little bit more. I get more into detail to that. But I wanted to have a podcast that everybody could come to if you didn’t have the book. So just know, you’ll have to go to the grocery store more often. That sucks. But it’s totally fine.

6. Don’t try to be paleo perfect [37:32]

The other thing with starting paleo is don’t try to be perfect. It really doesn’t matter if you’re perfect. Because who wants to live a perfect life for the rest of your life? You’re going to be so boring, and nobody is going to want to hang out with you or be friends with you. So don’t be perfect. Don’t try to be perfect. Because that means you won’t have a social life. Or you won’t have a holiday. Or you won’t have friends. Perfection is not the goal here, because there are so many things that make life imperfect. And that’s totally ok.

So what I mean by that is, when you start paleo, there’s no need for you to think, “OK, I can’t go to this birthday party because I can’t eat that.” You know what? Eat before, and bring a drink. When I know that I’m going to a party where there’s sh*t food, I eat a full meal before, and then I bring La Croix with me, or soda water with lime. So I can have sparkling water, and I can feel like I’m part of the group without snacking incessantly. So you don’t have to be the person who comes up and they’re like, “hey do you want some cheese dip?” And you’re like, “Oh no. I’m doing the paleo diet, and did you know why? This is so much better for you.” You know. You know when people are like know it all’s? Nobody likes a now it all. And PS, you don’t know it all. Because information is always changing. But you are just trying to find what works for you. So no need to push it on other people.

So plan ahead. There are social gatherings. There are holidays. Make your own food. Bring your own food. Say you’re going to a holiday party and you have to bring your own food to that party. Make stuff you can eat. You can do it. You can make your own stuff. I do it all the time, and I’ve gotten around it just fine. Haven’t had any issues. So make your own stuff. But remember that these social gatherings and these vacations and these holidays; you don’t get those back. They never come back. Still enjoy those little moments.

Some people don’t get to enjoy certain things. Say they have celiac, and there’s just no way they get to eat a certain thing. That’s totally ok. But if you’re a person who can maybe get away with that, and you know that your mom makes the best pumpkin pie and she would be upset if you didn’t have a piece, and you would be upset if you didn’t have a piece; have some f*cking pumpkin pie. Ok? Don’t be that person. Be imperfect. Ok? Ok. But for real. Don’t be the know it all. That’s just not going to work.

7. Getting your family on board [40:26]

So next is getting your family on board. Here’s what I recommend for family. Number one; don’t tell them it’s paleo. Ok? Don’t put that word out there. Don’t put out the word diet. Don’t put the word healthy out there. No paleo, no gluten free. Nothing. Serve them a meal, and see if they’ll eat it. Ok? I can promise you, my meals, the recipes I’ve made out there. I’ve made over a thousand recipes. Over a thousand, for sure, that are out there in the world. And I have seen many kids, many husband, many wives, eat my recipes who are not paleo or gluten free. So don’t tell them, and get it in their head, that something is not going to taste good right off the bat by putting the stigma of healthy in there. Because then they won’t want to eat it, and then they’ll eat it, and they’ll think it’s not as good as something else. So don’t f*cking out that word out there. Just make a casserole, make a curry, make a burger, make whatever, and give them a healthier option. And just put it on the table. That’s how I think you should start that.

If you have a spouse who won’t get on board with you, that sucks. If a person is refusing to be healthy, when you’re saying that you’ll spend the rest of your life with them and they won’t take care of themselves, that person needs to get their f*cking sh*t together. Because that is not fair to the other person. If you’re ruining your health when another person is dependent on you in some sort of way, that’s very, very selfish. So maybe you guys should talk about some counseling. I speak from experience. Not with my own husband, luckily. But in relationship experience. If a person doesn’t want to bend and make their life healthier for themselves, and you, that’s very selfish. But this happens. Maybe get a new husband or wife. I’m not saying anything, because that would be rude.

But do the same thing. Don’t tell them you’re going on a diet. Don’t’ tell them you need their support, if they’re a person who will refuse that. Just give them food. Give them food. If they refuse to eat something, tell them to make their own food. I know I’ve done that with my husband before. Like, oh you don’t want to eat this? I don’t care. This is what I’m making tonight. And what does he do? He eats it. Because he doesn’t want to make his own food. So give them delicious food. Find new recipes. Cook recipes that they like regularly. And the more they get interested in that food that you’re making, the more they might be interested in the health route you’re passing along. And they might want to join on that route with you. Take a little one speed bike with you. I don’t know if that analogy worked.

But just stop telling people they need to eat a certain way. It’s just overwhelming. My husband started eating paleo because he wanted to. He asked me; he followed my blog before we even started talking or dating. And we were hanging out. I can even picture him, we were driving along one day. And he was like, can you tell me about this paleo diet thing? And that’s where I talked about the paleo diet. And he asked questions about grains. And he was like, well what if I don’t feel sick? And I talked about what they do to our body. And just gave him details when he was ready. And that’s I think the biggest thing. Don’t force stuff on other people; let them come to you. But give them the delicious opportunities in the meantime. If you cook something delicious, the people will come. You know what I’m saying? It’s true. It’s what my blog started as; recipes.

So. That’s kind of how the best way to start. Know that there will be hiccups or whatever you call it along the way. Bumps in the road in how your diet is. And it will kind of go up and down, and you’ll have to find what works for you. But it’s step by step. It’s not like you have to be cold-cut, I’m paleo today. Done. It doesn’t work like that. For most people. Especially if you’re addicted to sugar, or if you’re addicted to alcohol. You’re addicted to carbs, which is sugar. It’s very hard to cut the cord for that. So don’t feel like you need to. Understand that healthy living is a step by step choice, and you can get there. You just have to put one foot in front of the other.

I’ve been eating paleo and gluten free for 7 years now. And it’s always changing. My hormones change. My body changes. I’m getting older. Everything is going to change, and I’ll have to change with that. And I know my diet is nowhere where it was when I started paleo 6 years ago. 7 years ago. When I first started, sorry the dog is snoring on me. That’s not me yawning. No, it is.

When I first started paleo, I was weighing all my food. I was eating chicken, broccoli, and almonds every single day. For almost every single meal. And I don’t do that anymore. And I don’t weigh out my food. And I don’t measure anything. I just eat and listen to my body. And I didn’t understand how to do that before. So that’s something you learn over time. What foods work for you, what doesn’t. And then you change as you go. So understand that it’s a process, for sure.

8. Paleo challenges [46:34]

So I want to talk about a few things that you’ll kind of pass along the way as you hear about dieting and getting healthier and changing, whatever. So these are things that are very popular that I’ve done pretty much all of. First is Whole30. Whole30 is everybody’s go-to. So when I first started paleo, I did a Whole30, and it was a very destructive behavior for me. So with Whole30, you go pretty much very strict paleo for 30 days. And I think this is amazing for people who need to really reset their body. Figure out what foods they were addicted to. What foods they don’t actually need in their diet. How a certain food or food group affects them.

So when they add those certain foods back in, they’re like, “Oh. That doesn’t feel good.” And you got your body so used to feeling like sh*t all the time that you don’t know you feel like sh*t. So when these people cut out the sh*t, and add in healthy foods, then when they’re adding them back in, they’re like, “Oh. This is not how I want to feel.” Because they actually felt good for 30 days. And cleaning out the sh*t makes you feel good. It helps you sleep better. You feel more energized during the day. You just are in a better f*cking mood. So when you add those foods back in, you lose that. And you knew what it felt like for 30 days. So that’s why I think Whole30 is so great.

Why I think it’s so sh*tty at the same time; and I see this all day every day on my Instagram. When people will say; I’ll post a picture of a cookie, or chocolate, and they’ll say, “I can’t wait for day 31 of my Whole30.” So all people are doing is dreaming about the food they want after the 30 days. It’s often like competitions. When you see those figure competitions, and you see some super skinny ripped b*tch eating a donut after her competition. It’s like, you just restricted yourself so much that all you’re doing is thinking about the food you’re going to have after these 30 days. And I think that’s a very bad behavior.

And I say this, having this behavior. When I was like, “Oh my god, I can’t wait until day 31.” And then you just f*cking eat as much sh*t as you can, and just destroy all the hard work that you put into 30 days of taking care of your body in a positive way. In a healthy way. And then you destroy it, because you’re like, I made it past the 30 days; f*ck this. What’s the point of that? So you just know, but you don’t care? I’m saying this out of a person who has been through this. And I know what behaviors I cannot take. I cannot take challenges like that. I can’t take restriction. I can’t take telling myself I can’t have something because then I want it so much more.

So, Whole30 doesn’t work for me and how my brain is wired. But it has been amazing for other people, and many people see it as a positive experience. I just saw it as a negative one the whole time with the outcome of eating sh*t at the end. So, that’s something to keep in mind for the Whole30. But I think it is very helpful for figuring out what foods work for you and what don’t.

9. Keto [50:07]

One of the big ones right now is keto. So, keto is very carb restrictive. And high fat. So, I don’t know much about keto. I know that I was pretty much eating keto when I first started paleo. And I lost 30 pounds, and then I gained 30 pounds. It was this great fix, and I was like, “Oh my god. I’m going to eat all fat all the time.” And then I gained a lot of weight. And I don’t know much about keto. There’s a lot of information out there that you can actually read about it.

But I do think it is a bit of a fad. And I think it can be great for some people. But I know when I was eating keto for a long time, and low carb, very low carb. For my exercise schedule, and I workout 5 days a week. I don’t think I do anything crazy. I think I push myself hard in the gym, but I’m not an Olympic athlete who is training multiple times a day. As soon as I lowered my fat, and I increased my carbohydrate intake, I lost weight. So all this sh*t of telling us that we need to do a very low carb diet, and I believed that for a long time. When I added carbs into my diet, I lost weight. So I think that’s important to remember. You may think that keto is the way to go, and your body might not agree with you. So just keep that in mind. I don’t know much about keto. So I don’t have much to say about it. I just know from my own restriction on carbohydrates, I gained with from that and lost it once I added it back in. So keep that in mind.

10. Macros [51:43]

Another one. We’ve got two more of the very popular things. Macros. I feel like macros have calmed down a bit. I haven’t seen them on my explore page on my Instagram as much. IIFYM; if it fits your macros hashtag. Hard hashtag there. When you’re like, “If it fits my macros” and it has f*cking a piece of cake with chocolate syrup and marshmallow fluff on top. They’re like, “I’ve got to get the rest of my carbs in for the day.” Whatever. I f*cking hate that part of macros.

So if you want to hear stuff about macros, I think it is highly important to listen to my girlfriends Joy and Clare at Girls Gone WOD. They have multiple episodes about it. And I just listened to one this morning. I think it’s called Macro Conclusion. Or the End of Macros, something along those lines. Their latest episode. And they talk about both of their experience with macros, and with losing weight. Joy actually lost a ton of weight. She lost her period. And she talks about it; she actually gets emotional about it. Because macros really took over her life, and she was very unhappy. And I think she was a person who was never obsessed with food in the first place. So she never had those really obsessive behaviors, like I did as a kid.

So that’s why I don’t go down the macros route. Because I don’t want to be obsessed with food. I want to eat my food. I want to enjoy my food. I want to stop when I’m satisfied, not when I’m full. I don’t like feeling overly full, as I figured that out over the years. So I just want to eat until I’m satisfied and I had a good healthy meal. I don’t want to weigh and measure things. I don’t want to worry about if I got enough carbs in for the day. I don’t want to do that. That’s great for some people. But it was very interesting listening to Joy and her point of view and her having a hard time with it. And they’re done with macros. They’re not doing macros. I don’t think either of them are doing them anymore. They also did Whole30, so you can listen to them on that.

But I do not believe that if you have carbohydrates left you should be eating the f*cking chocolate cake with syrup and marshmallow fluff on top. Know what food is going into your body. Know the ingredients. Not just if it fits your grams per day. Eating healthy, just going back to basics. That’s what I believe in.

11. Intermittent fasting [54:14]

And then intermittent fasting. That’s another one that you’ll hear when you get into this space of paleo. And I did lots of intermittent fasting. And I was like, when I look back at it now, I’m like, why was I starving myself? What is the point of that? I get there are all these health benefits. And it goes back to times back in the day, we didn’t always have food so we had to fast. But honestly. You’re fasting at night.

I had Cassy on one podcast from Fed and Fit, and she was like, you’re fasting at night when you’re sleeping. There you go. So, you fast for about 8 hours, maybe more than that. Probably more than that. Because maybe you had dinner, and you didn’t eat until you had breakfast the next morning. So you’re fasting for 8 to 12 hours. Whatever. Eww, Jackson just farted! I wonder if you can hear that on my podcast. That was gross. Doggie. This is what you get when you get a Frenchie.

So I feel like intermittent fasting is just another way to create negative behaviors around food. So you’re like, “I’m not going to eat until this time. I’m not going to eat until this time. I’m going to starve myself here.” I was doing a 24 hour fast at one point. Like, what the f*ck am I doing? I’m just creating more negative behaviors around food, and hating myself more. And hating food more. Stop. If you hate the food you’re putting into your body, and you feel like you need to starve yourself because of it; put good food into your body! Stop doing that.

I don’t believe in any of those for my own lifestyle and behavior and brain functioning. I believe in eating round meals. I eat three meals a day. I sometimes snack in between. I eat dairy sometimes. I stay away from grains. I eat gluten free grains sometimes. And you know, I don’t have any rules around my life. I just don’t. If I want a piece of cake at a wedding, I will have it. That’s the one thing that I always go back to. Because that’s pretty much the one place that I will eat gluten. I don’t really care about it any other time. And this is coming from a person who ate at Olive Garden weekly, and had a Cinnabon every other day. So I’m into f*cking gluten. But I was able to remove that from my life, and know that my life is so much better off without it.

So, for me, I like to stay away. I don’t do keto, I don’t do macros, I don’t do intermittent fasting. I don’t do Whole30. I just eat food. Healthy food. I eat grass-fed. I eat grass finished. I eat hormone free, no antibiotics, cage free. I don’t even always do organic with my vegetables. Pretty much, because I shop at Whole Foods most of the time. So most of the food there is organic. And that’s about it. I don’t worry about all these things. I definitely couldn’t worry about it at the beginning when I started paleo. I was just trying to eat on-sale meat. I was eating a lot of beef stew. Because that’s a cheap cut of meat, and it was on sale all the time.

So do what works for you and your lifestyle, and know that paleo and gluten free and healthier lifestyle is a long adventure. It doesn’t have to be cut and dry. It doesn’t have to be today. You’re perfect today and everything is solved. It’s a long-term investment in your own health. Information will come out there. Times will change. Protocols will change with our meat standards, and our vegetables, and whatever else. And you just roll with the punches. Roll with the new knowledge out there. Except for What the Health. No offense to them since I haven’t watched it, but.

12. Alcohol [58:13]

So that’s how I started with paleo. That’s how I recommend other people starting with paleo. And just understand, removing alcohol. I’ve said this in many podcasts. My amazing girlfriend, Vanessa, who I went on book tour with, and I’ve had her on this podcast, twice now. I was with her in Austin. She is a girl who loves to drink. Loves a cocktail. And I was with her in Austin, and she said how she hadn’t drank in 7 months. And this was like, what the f*ck. This is a girlfriend I’ve known for so long who drinks every time we would be out to dinner, she would have a cocktail. And she hasn’t drunk a drop of alcohol in 7 months.

She wrote a blog post about it. If you go to Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind, it’s in her maple fig cake recipe. She talks about removing alcohol. And what it’s done for her own health. And why she did it. And why she’s sticking with it. And it’s amazing. I’m so proud of her for that, because alcohol is very hard for many people to remove from their diet. So, remember food is so important. And alcohol is very important too. If you want to see a lifestyle change. If you want to see a body change. If you want to see a sleep activity change. Mood change. Removing alcohol is huge. And we don’t always think about alcohol on the food side. But I think it’s really important. And it’s one of the main things I recommend to people. And they stop listening as soon as I recommend that. People don’t like to hear that. But I’m going to keep f*cking putting it out there.

So those are the things I recommend. Definitely check out Girls Gone WOD podcast. They talk about macros, and they talk about Whole30. Check out Vanessa, Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind. Her maple fig cake recipe, she talks about cutting out alcohol and the things that have helped her. But those people, I think listening to other people’s experiences with what has worked for them and what hasn’t is always very eye opening. And it kind of helps you guide yourself along the way. But that’s what has worked for me, and that’s what I recommend for other people. And that’s how to get started with paleo. But understand that it’s an ongoing route. It’s never ending. It is I-70, or whatever highway that’s by you that goes forever. You just keep on going. I don’t know any better analogies, ok. But health is ongoing. You figure it out along the way. And you morph along the way.

I’m about to turn 30 this next year, and I know my hormones are going to change in my 30s. And I’m going to roll with the punches, and I’m going to figure it out along the way. So know that things change. Bodies change. And we can just keep learning and keep figuring it out. So I hope that helps.

If you have any sort of questions, come to my blog. Leave me a question on my blog. I don’t always respond to Instagram questions. Especially, “How do I get started on paleo?” That’s a very, very intricate question to answer on Instagram. So feel free to leave a comment on my blog. I answer those faster than email. Because I never answer email. I have an email assistant who answers for me. Or if I get to an email, it’s a miracle. So if you hear a response from me, it’s a literal miracle.

Come to Leave a comment or question on this blog post. Or any other blog post. I’ll get back to you on there. I am going to have one more podcast coming to you next week before I leave, or when I’m on vacation. And I may have to skip a week, unless I decide to record in the Caribbean. But I’m trying to keep it at least amount of work as possible. And I don’t really feel like this is work, but it’s good to just tune out and not get on the internet. But I am going to get on the internet at some point. I’ve got to share the fun stuff, and I’ve got to keep this job going. But if I skip a week, I apologize. And I’ll get back to it as soon as I get back from the Caribbean. Or do you say it Caribbean? How do you say it? I don’t know. F*ck, I don’t know. What if I say it wrong? Who knows.

Wait, you want to hear something that is cool. Yeah, I think I can tell this because she announced it on her podcast. She doesn’t have a podcast. On her blog. My friend Vanessa is getting married, and she’s getting married in the Caribbean in St. Martin, and I get to be her witness on the first night in St. Martin. How f*cking cool is that?! So rad. I need more people in my life to get married.

Again, if you’re a hot, successful, truly nice person out there, I have a beautiful friend for you. Man, I just got a Google alert that there’s someone trying to break into my email. I’ve got to go, man. F*cking rude people. Ok, love you long time. Just head to for new recipes, new posts, new stuff. And have a wonderful weekend. I will talk to you soon, baby boo. See you next time. Bye-bye.

I get an email or two every month with someone asking where to start when it comes to eating paleo, so I thought it would be perfect for talking through on a podcast! Starting paleo can feel pretty daunting, but […] I get an email or two every month with someone asking where to start when it comes to eating paleo, so I thought it would be perfect for talking through on a podcast! Starting paleo can feel pretty daunting, but […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes
Girl Talk x Four – Episode 44: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 22 Jul 2017 17:38:11 +0000 12 While in Austin, I recorded a podcast with Lexi from Lexi’s Clean Kitchen, Cassy from Fed & Fit and Vanessa from Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind and we talked about a lot of girl things, awkward dating stories and inappropriate […] While in Austin, I recorded a podcast with Lexi from Lexi’s Clean Kitchen, Cassy from Fed & Fit and Vanessa from Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind and we talked about a lot of girl things, awkward dating stories and inappropriate bodily functions. It’s all quite fun. And also probably annoying.


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 44 Transcription!

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: Ok. We’ve been recording this entire time. So don’t worry I can cut it down. I won’t though. But, ok. Welcome to the 44th episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. I’m so glad to have you here today, whoever you are out there. But I’m mostly glad to have Cassy, Lexi, and Vanessa here today.

If you’ve listened to my podcast before, you know that I’ve had these ladies on here before. And if you’re sitting in this room, they’re all looking at their phones right now.

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: These f*cking b*tches. {laughs} So anyways. I’ve had all these ladies on, because they’re my close girlfriends. I met them through the blogsphere. Through the internet. Interwebz, if you will. And they’re all f*cking awesome. And they’re all totally different. And I just love them. But they live in different states, so I never get to hang out with them. We only communicate through text.

So, today we’re here in Texas, in Austin, at the Siete Foods headquarters. They have a recording studio, which is probably why this will be the best podcast I’ll ever record. And yeah. So we’re here today. That’s what we’re doing. We’re hanging out in Austin. So before we get started; I don’t have any questions planned. So before we get started, will you guys introduce yourselves? Talk about who you are. Let’s keep it quick. We have a lot of females in here, so we’ll talk a lot. But a little synopsis about yourself. Just a life synopsis. Do you want to start, Vanessa?

Vanessa Barajas: I would love to, thanks so much Juli.

Juli Bauer: Yes, yes.

Vanessa Barajas: Hi guys! I am Vanessa. My name is Vanessa Barajas. I run the blog Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind. So if you haven’t seen it, go ahead and check it out. My kind of whole premise is I make sweet treats and desserts that don’t have the guilt. So it’s all paleo friendly, gluten free, grain free. But it still actually tastes like the real thing. So it’s a little bit about me.

I’m also very excited that podcasts aren’t videos, because I feel like if you could see how awesome we look this morning, you’d be kind of happy, too. We’ve definitely got the face for radio right now.

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: So yeah. But I think that’s it.

Juli Bauer: Do you want to tell anybody about something special that happened in your life?

Vanessa Barajas: Oh. Could you be talking about the fact that I just got engaged?!

Juli Bauer: Oh sh*t.

Vanessa Barajas: And I have this crazy amazing engagement ring and I’m so excited?!

Juli Bauer: Yes. Yes. Congratulations.

Vanessa Barajas: Thank you very much. Yes. My boyfriend and I of 7 years just got engaged last week. So we’ve been joking around that this whole trip to Austin is just to celebrate that, because Siete Foods, 7. Siete means 7 in Spanish.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Thanks for clarifying.

Vanessa Barajas: And my boyfriend and I, we’ve been together for 7 years. So this whole trip is just to celebrate that. Hmm-hmm.

Lexi Kornblum: Love it.

Juli Bauer: Congratulations.

Vanessa Barajas: Thank you so much!

Juli Bauer: Too bad people can’t see your ring right now. Because it’s blinding.

Vanessa Barajas: You guys. I’m obsessed with it. So they keep getting mad at me, because I’m like, “You guys, look at my ring in this light! It looks so shiny and sparkly in this light. Wait, let’s take a boomerang. Wait, let’s take a picture.” So I’m definitely obnoxious right now, for sure.

Juli Bauer: Just post a manicure photo, because it’s just a reason to show your ring right now. You were on your phone 2 seconds ago.

Vanessa Barajas: But is my manicure still fresh? Is it fresh enough to post?

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: OK, if my hands look ugly you guys, I kind of don’t love my hands. And my manicure is probably not top notch. So no judging, #nojudging.

Juli Bauer: #Nojudgement.

Vanessa Barajas: Ok.

Juli Bauer: So Vanessa and I went on book tour when we both came out with our last cookbooks. And we just get along so well. And we talked about even doing a podcast together. But Vanessa has like 47 jobs. So there’s no way that should could have actually made a podcast happen every week.

Vanessa Barajas: That’s 1000% true story.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: And I keep telling Juli and Cassy, since they are doing such cool fashion photos and stuff, that I want them to hire me to be their personal fashion photographers. So that would be job number, like 5.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: But I mean, that’s fine. Because I’m under 10 jobs at this point. So it shouldn’t be a problem at all.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Don’t complain.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. I mean, why don’t you get off your lazy ass and do something with your life?

Everybody: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: So that’s a little bit about Vanessa. 5-job Vanessa.

Everybody: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Lexi. Would you like to tell us a story about yourself?

Lexi Kornblum: Yes. Hey everyone. So excited to be here. I’m Lexi, from Lexi’s Clean Kitchen. And I started Lexi’s Clean Kitchen four years ago. I blog clean eating, healthy, real food recipes. They’re gluten free. They’re grain free, mostly. They’re dairy free. And they’re all delicious. I do meal plans, and I have a cookbook now. So all that kind of good stuff. So check it out. That’s me.

Juli Bauer: So you have a dog that you’re obsessed with.

Lexi Kornblum: I do. He’s a humongous golden retriever, and he’s such a little moosh.

Juli Bauer: He is the cutest golden retriever. Literally ever.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Why are some golden retrievers not as cute as that?

Lexi Kornblum: I don’t know. I’ve seen golden retrievers that can hold like 4 tennis balls in their mouth, and he can only fit one. So he has like a really small snout.

Juli Bauer: What a pussy. {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: I know. Mike is always like, he really is the biggest pus.

Juli Bauer: Ok so he has the smallest mouth.

Lexi Kornblum: So he has a really small snout, so he looks like a puppy.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: Even though he’s now 3.

Juli Bauer: Yes, he totally looks like a puppy.

Lexi Kornblum: He’s my angel.

Juli Bauer: Do you like your dog, or your husband more.

Vanessa Barajas: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: Oh my god. Mike asks me that all the time. I’m like, don’t make me choose.

Everybody: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: That’s an impossible thing to decide.

Juli Bauer: OK. So I had the owner of my gym on a podcast once, and he asked a question. If the house was burning and I could only take my husband or Jackson out of the house.

Vanessa Barajas: Oh my gosh! Who would ask that kind of question!

Lexi Kornblum: Well what’d you say?

Juli Bauer: Oh I picked Jackson, for sure.

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: I was like, I couldn’t carry my husband.

Everybody: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: He can get himself out.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, don’t be a child. You can get yourself out. But I picked Jackson for sure. And then Brian listened to the podcast. I think it’s the only one he listened to.

Vanessa Barajas: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: I know. The last time I was on your podcast, we talked about things that annoy you about your husband. Because that was just when I got married. And that was the only podcast I’ve ever been on that Mike’s listened to. He’s like, Thank you.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: You’re talking about my pubic hair and facial hair all over the place.

Everybody: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: The worst.

Lexi Kornblum: I was like, you’re welcome.

Juli Bauer: All their hair all over. And they think they’ve cleaned it up. And you’re like, no. Your hair is everywhere.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah. He’s like, I cleaned it! I’m like, what do you mean? I just walked up against the sink, now I have hair on me.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. I have hairy nipples.

Everybody: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: Because Lexi is 4’11”; right?

Lexi Kornblum: 4’10”, but you can go with 4’11”.

Juli Bauer: Ok. No, we’ll give you the 4’10”. So we’re staying at this AirBNB right now. And the sink.

Lexi Kornblum: You guys, it’s the highest sink ever. I have to go on my tippy toes.

Juli Bauer: The sink touches her collar bone.

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: So, if those sinks are like that at home, then she has hairy nipples after Mike leaves the hair all over the sink.

Lexi Kornblum: Our sinks are like a normal height at home. But I still get hair on me. It’s like, oh my god.

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Oh. She’s like the most petite human being I’ve ever seen so cute. Ok. Cassy, synopsis.

Cassy Joy: Hey. My name is Cassy.

Everybody: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: I’m so nervous.

Juli Bauer: I know, I’m sweating.

Cassy Joy: I am. Probably the sweatshirt I’m wearing.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. We’re in Austin.

Vanessa Barajas: It’s 1000 degrees outside, and Cassy is in a sweatshirt.

Cassy Joy: It’s just so soft. My name is Cassy Joy Garcia, and I blog over at Fed and Fit. I started blogging, I don’t know, 6 years ago? Yeah. It’s a healthy food blog. Paleo friendly mostly. And I’m a nutrition consultant. And I run a food and fitness program every month. I have a book out called Fed and Fit. I’m really good at describing what I do. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: You’re doing great. It’s awkward, and everybody stares at you. We all know your story, and staring at you.

Cassy Joy: I know. Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Ok. So, what’s the biggest thing you’re working on right now?

Cassy Joy: Well probably the biggest thing I’m working on right now is a food product that’s going to come out. Hopefully be available to be eaten in early 2018.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Available to be eaten.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Good description.

Cassy Joy: Right? Because it’s going to be; it’s going to exist in the world, but you can’t really eat it until next year.

Juli Bauer: Ok. I can’t wait to eat it.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: I’m so excited.

Juli Bauer: So that’s your biggest work on right now.

Cassy Joy: Mm-hmm. That is. Yep. It will be fun.

Juli Bauer: Ok sweet. So here’s the thing, ladies. So, on my podcast every week while I talk by myself for an hour, and yawn through the entire podcast because I don’t get any sort of oxygen, I talk about the Bachelor every week. And there are about 95% of the people skip over that part for sure, but I don’t give a f*ck. So I’m going to tell you guys what happened on the Bachelor, real quick.

Cassy Joy: Tell me!

Juli Bauer: Just a quick. Only one part. Because it leads into a question.

Vanessa Barajas: Let them know that none of us watch it.

Juli Bauer: Ok, yeah. Nobody in this room watches the Bachelor or Bachelorette. I don’t f*cking know why, because it is the best drama. And Vanessa is over here talking about meditation, and I’m like, get out of here. I just want to talk about Dean’s dad on the Bachelorette.

So they don’t watch the Bachelorette. This season has been quite dramatic, guys. So Rachel is the Bachelorette. And all of the guys that were chosen for her are the worst. And ABC just wants to ruin her life. But they had, you go home and meet the parents. Have you guys ever watched the show?

Lexi Kornblum: I know that they do that.

Vanessa Barajas: I just know the thing about the rose. If you want to keep someone or something, you give them a rose.

Juli Bauer: {laughs}

Vanessa Barajas: Is that still a thing? Do they still do that?

Juli Bauer: Yes. {laughs}

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: Literally, all I know about the show.

Juli Bauer: That’s all you know. And Vanessa watches all the good shows. Like Game of Thrones.

Vanessa Barajas: Oh yeah, I watch real TV. Thank you.

Juli Bauer: She talks about GOT all the time. We had a good conversation. Did you see something?

Vanessa Barajas: I just thought that was a spider.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} It’s not.

Vanessa Barajas: It’s like paint on the window sill.

Juli Bauer: Ok, we’re fine. We’re fine. It’s ok. So they go home and they meet the parents. And she goes home with like 4 dudes, and meets all their parents. So, she met four of the parents, and one dad. It’s really sad. This guy Dean, who is like 25 and shouldn’t be getting married. He lost his mom when he was 15, of cancer. And then his dad just became the worst dad ever, and wasn’t there for him. And then the family kind of fell apart. And then his dad became this {laughing} I shouldn’t be laughing. Everybody’s spiritual journey is different. But his dad became this yogi, but like a certain kind of yogi. And he makes up a name for himself. And it sounds like an avatar name. Do you guys watch Avatar?

Vanessa Barajas: I’ve seen it.

Juli Bauer: Ok, thank god. Literally, that’s my favorite movie, so I would not be able to friends with you anymore.

Vanessa Barajas: Is that really your favorite movie?

Juli Bauer: Yeah, stop judging me.

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: So hard. So hard.

Cassy Joy: The blue people?

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Yes. The blue people. So it’s like, Nan-Tuck-Tuck.

Cassy Joy: Are you serious?

Juli Bauer: That’s pretty much the name he gave himself. But it means eternally beautiful. He called himself eternally beautiful. And his dad his this long white beard. And they’re living in Aspen. I’m like, where the f*ck is this in Aspen? Because he’s like, nobody lives in Aspen. And he’s wearing an all purple getup.

Lexi Kornblum: Like a jumpsuit?

Juli Bauer: No. Like, yoga clothing. Meditation clothing. You probably wear this stuff. {laughs}

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah, it’s identical to what I wear when I meditate. For sure.

Everybody: {laughs}

Vanessa Barajas: Because you can’t reach those levels without that kind of outfit on. So.

Juli Bauer: So, they walk in. And this guy has this all purple outfit. He has purple crocs on. And then a purple, like…

Vanessa Barajas: Turban?

Juli Bauer: Yes.

Vanessa Barajas: I was going to call it a turbine.

Juli Bauer: I don’t know what it’s called, and someone is going to get mad at me and say that I’m racist or something. But this purple head thing. It’s purple head to toe. White beard. Very strange. And he makes everybody lie on the floor. They don’t have chairs or anything in the room. I’m sure the producers kind of manipulated that.

Vanessa Barajas: Like in the house?

Juli Bauer: Yeah. So they have to all lie down on pillows on the floor. And then he’s like, “I’m going to play the gong.” And they all have to close their eyes. And he’s like “Listen to the gong.” And then he plays the gong. And they’re just lying there.

Vanessa Barajas: Was the bachelorette like, dude I’m out of here. I can’t.

Juli Bauer: She’s like, no. She’s trying to be nice. Open to other cultures. And she’s just; here’s the thing. She’s probably like, ok this guy is going to be the next bachelor, because I’m not going to pick him and everybody is going to feel sorry for him. But. Ok so anyway, he’s the worst. The dad’s the worst. And this guy Dean is pretty much crying, because he’s like, you weren’t there for me when I lost my mom.

Everybody: Aww.

Juli Bauer: It’s just major need of big time therapy. And then of course, you know what, Vanessa?

Vanessa Barajas: Hmm?

Juli Bauer: She doesn’t give him the rose.

Everybody: {gasp}

Juli Bauer: So he doesn’t get to move on. So she makes him go through this. I know, thanks for the dramatic effect ladies.

Everybody: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: I’m invested now!

Juli Bauer: I know. You get so invested. It’s so good. So, she doesn’t give him the rose. He leaves. He’s totally sad.

Lexi Kornblum: Well he’s probably bummed. Like, because of my dad I didn’t move on.

Juli Bauer: Yes. Because he walked up to the house. And he’s like, this is not a representation of my childhood. I don’t want you to judge me off of this. He’s so embarrassed.

Everybody: Aww.

Juli Bauer: I feel so bad the producers made him do this and he couldn’t just introduce his friends. It was so sad. So here’s my question. Leeway. Have you guys ever dated anybody that you had to date a pretty weird ass family. Or just met parents that you were like, I don’t want to be a part of that family.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah. I’ve had an experience like that.

Juli Bauer: Let’s hear it, Lexi.

Lexi Kornblum: Well I don’t know how much I can go into.

Juli Bauer: You can.

Lexi Kornblum: Ok.

Juli Bauer: Nobody listens to this podcast. {laughs}

Everybody: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: That’s exactly what I was thinking. I’m like; what are the chances these people listen.

Juli Bauer: If there are any chances, I’ve talked sh*t about every single person I know on this podcast. So it’s fine.

Everybody: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: I dated a guy. So, background is my parents got divorced, and it was really messy.

Juli Bauer: How old were you when they got divorced?

Lexi Kornblum: Young. It took my whole childhood. It was like, really rough. So it took like 10 years for the whole thing to be done. But I was young. Or youngish. So I met this guy, and I really liked him. I was young. I was like, oh my god. He’s so great. And I was like, oh my god mom, you won’t believe it. His parents eat dinner together every night. They’re such a normal family. “Normal”, because who’s normal? Whatever.

My mom is like, don’t. You never know, you know. So we’re dating, dating a while. And then all of a sudden the mom is like doing drugs. It got real weird real quick.

Juli Bauer: Doing drugs?

Lexi Kornblum: Doing hard drugs. I’m like, leaving stuff in the kids’ cars. And it just got weird.

Juli Bauer: Uggh!

Lexi Kornblum: That was not a good situation.

Juli Bauer: So you didn’t have a gong situation.

Lexi Kornblum: I didn’t have a gong situation.

Juli Bauer: Drugs. That’s a bummer.

Lexi Kornblum: It is a bummer.

Juli Bauer: Who else?

Vanessa Barajas: I’m trying to think.

Juli Bauer: Because you’ve been with Brad for like 47 years.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. Since forever.

Lexi Kornblum: {whispering}

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Lexi. Lexi’s like; I shouldn’t have even said it. Literally nobody listens to this podcast. Believe me. They listen to one episode, and they’re like, I’m out of here.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Lexi is such a sweet soul.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh my god, I’m having an internal panic attack.

Vanessa Barajas: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: Have some green juice.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, do you want green juice? Do you want to sit next to the essential oils on this side?

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. It’s like aromatherapy.

Juli Bauer: It’s peppermint. Just inhale it. {laughing} I had one who the mom was; ok. Wait. Here’s another part of the show. So the other guy that she is obviously in super in love with. It’s so obvious. She can’t stop making out with him, and they make out like this {slurping}. It’s like the grossest sound of all time. I’m like, just calm your tits. How do you make out like that? So she meets his parents in Miami, and his mom has this thick accent. It sounds like she’s from Russia. It sounds like that. And she sees her son and she just starts crying! And then she’s like, “You cannot take my son from me! You cannot take him!” And she’s like cray-cray. She’s obviously in love with her son.

Cassy Joy: Oh no!

Juli Bauer: So I was talking to my mother-in-law. And not just loves her son; like she wants to date her son. For sure.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: Eww!

Juli Bauer: Yeah, it’s really weird. And I talked to my mother-in-law. And she’s like, “But I feel that way too.” I was like, ok. You want to date your son? Because she obviously wants to date her son. Have you had any moms like that? Where they’re overprotective. {laughing} We have to be safe on this podcast.

Cassy Joy: Definitely can’t talk about some {laughing}.

Juli Bauer: F*ck, I know.

Cassy Joy: Just kidding.

Juli Bauer: Luckily, my mother-in-law just sends me makeup in the mail and calls to tell me that she loves me.

Vanessa Barajas: That’s so sweet.

Cassy Joy: She sounds so awesome.

Juli Bauer: I don’t know if she cried on our; she definitely didn’t cry when she met me for the first time {laughs} saying I was going to steal her son away from her. Or on our wedding day.

Lexi Kornblum: No, but there are people that are like that. That are just; even if they don’t want to date their son. They’re just very protective. Like their mom is babying.

Cassy Joy: Totally. On the flip end of that spectrum. I was wracking my brain on boyfriends. I lived under such a rock. {laughs} You guys, I was such a goodie-goodie in high school.

Juli Bauer: You still are. Let’s be real.

Everybody: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: Well I went to college, I remember I came home to my mom and dad. And meeting wonderful people. Right? Lovely people. Other students in college. And they’re good people. It’s a really good school. They have great families. And they tell me these wild stories. They were going to parties, and they would do all this stuff. And I came home and I told my mom and dad. I was like, you guys had it really easy! I never even tried any of this stuff. They were like, well we knew that but we weren’t going to tell you! {laughs}

Lexi Kornblum: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: Anyway. There was this one guy I dated in high school. He probably doesn’t even remember, so even if he does listen, I think we’re good.

Everybody: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: He doesn’t listen to my podcast. There’s no men. I think there’s one dude out there. My dad. {laughs} I don’t think he listens either.

Cassy Joy: That’d be sweet. He; gosh, how old were we? We were like, maybe sophomores in high school. And I just remember we went on maybe two dates. But it was a weird thing for me, because my mom and dad were so protective. And my mom was such a bulldog when anybody came over to our house. In terms of policing. And it’s not like I wouldn’t be allowed to just sit down and talk with people. She just gave them a hard time. She’s like, “You mess her up, you’ve got to deal with me!” Kind of thing.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Cassy Joy: So that’s kind of what I was used to. And I went over to this guy’s house, and his mom and dad, on the opposite end of overprotective, I want to marry my son. Were like, “Do you guys want us to leave the room?”

Juli Bauer: Eww.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh my god.

Cassy Joy: Kind of stuff.

Lexi Kornblum: So awkward.

Cassy Joy: How old is sophomore? 15?

Vanessa Barajas: 15 yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah.

Cassy Joy: He was like, what? No! Please don’t leave the room!

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: I was like, f*ck yes, I want you to leave the room. That’s the difference between me and Cassy.

Cassy Joy: {laughing} So that was really interesting to me. It was kind of like, his mom and dad were so just…

Juli Bauer: Different than yours.

Cassy Joy: Just so different. And it’s not that they weren’t good people. It was just, I had never experienced that before.

Lexi Kornblum: One time, a guy was picking me up to go on a date. And my brother, who was like, really jacked up at that point decided he was going to come out and scare the sh*t out of the guy. He comes out with no shirt on, just…

Juli Bauer: {laughs} No shirt on?!

Lexi Kornblum: And the kid liked stalled out in the driveway. He was like, sh*tting his pants, he was so nervous. And my brother was like, “Don’t f*ck with her. Make she’s home” I was like, ugh. Go! Let’s get out of here.

Juli Bauer: Do you have any creepy parent stories?

Vanessa Barajas: No! I feel like, I mean. I’ve dated jerk face guys, for sure. But their parents seem to be normal for the most part. I guess, one of my ex-boyfriends. His mom was a little out there.

Juli Bauer: That’s fine. Everybody’s a little out there.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: I think all our parents are a little out there.

Vanessa Barajas: I don’t really have any stories where anything crazy happened.

Juli Bauer: What’s your least favorite dating moment?

Vanessa Barajas: My least favorite dating moment.

Juli Bauer: Did you have even one date that you’re like; that is never going to happen again.

Vanessa Barajas: Oh, I kind of have a good story.

Cassy Joy: Tell me everything!

Everybody: {laughs}

Vanessa Barajas: Ok. So this is the days of MySpace. You guys remember MySpace?

Everybody: Mm-hmm. Yes. And you’d have music? {laughs}

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah!

Juli Bauer: The best.

Vanessa Barajas: Where you’d click on your profile, and then a song plays. And you’re like; who’s going to be in my top 8? I don’t want Tom in my top 8. Get off of my top 8, Tom. Because I want my real friends.

Juli Bauer: I wonder what Tom is up to nowadays.

Vanessa Barajas: Dude, he’s like a bajillionaire, still, and he’s cruising the. I saw, he’s got an Instagram account, and it’s really funny because it’s got his MySpace Tom picture as his profile picture. And it’s like, “I’m Tom. I invented MySpace.” Or whatever. And then he’s like, cruising with some hottie patottie model in the Mediterranean or something.

Juli Bauer: I want to look him up.

Vanessa Barajas: You should totally, because it’s really funny.

Juli Bauer: Let’s request him as a friend.

Vanessa Barajas: Ok! So I met this guy; or this guy ended up contacting me on MySpace. Because you’d put all your interests and stuff on your page, and we liked the same band. So he DMd me. And he’s like, “Hey, what’s up. I see that you like this same band.” And I’m like, “Oh my god!” This was in my 20s, so I just judged everybody by their musical tastes. So I was like, oh my gosh your so cool! And he owned a skateboard shop. Watch he listens to his podcast too. Now I feel like Lexi where I’m like, oh my god. If he’s listening to this, he totally knows who I’m talking about.

Juli Bauer: Nobody. Ok, you guys have to get this in your head.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: There are like 10 females out there that listen to this, and that’s it.

Vanessa Barajas: Ok.

Juli Bauer: You guys don’t listen to it, and you’re my closest friends.

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: So there’s your sign.

Vanessa Barajas: Ok. So he owned a skateboard shop. And he was 12 years older than me. So I was like, “oh my god, it’s totally an older guy. I’m so cool. And he owns a skate shop.” And he lived about 2 hours away from where I lived. So we ended up just talking over MySpace and kind of getting to know each other. And then we decided to actually meet in person and go on a date. So I was crazy nervous. So we go on this date. We end up having a really good time. So him and I actually start seeing each other. I think the whole thing lasted maybe 6 months. But we would only see each other maybe every other week, because one of us would have to drive two hours to see the other person.

So I went up there; it was during Christmas, I remember. And I went up there to visit him. And he was at work, because he had to go work at the skate shop, because he was cool guy. And he was in a band too.

Juli Bauer: Oh sh*t.

Vanessa Barajas: So I’m just like, oh, we’re so MTB.

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: I just love him. So while he’s at work, he’s like, go ahead and just hang out. He had roommates and stuff, but his roommates were super cool. He’s like, you can hang out with them, or you can just stay in the room and watch TV, or go on the computer, or whatever you want to do. So I’m like, Ok. So I’m going on the computer.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh god.

Vanessa Barajas: Checking my MySpace. So I was like, oh I remember him. And I took a picture the other day, I want to put that on my MySpace page. And so I go on the computer, and I just click on the photos, to try and find the picture of us. Because I had seen him upload it the night before. And let’s be honest. I was snooping a little bit, ok.

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: I’m not going to lie. I’m going to be honest. I was like, “What am I getting myself into.”

Juli Bauer: How old are you?

Vanessa Barajas: I was probably 25. Probably about 24, 25.

Juli Bauer: OK.

Vanessa Barajas: So I click on his pictures, and I see all these folders with girls’ names on them.

Juli Bauer: Ok.

Cassy Joy: No.

Vanessa Barajas: So I click into each folder, and it’s like pictures of him having sex with all these other girls. Like, by folder names. And I was like, oh my god.

Juli Bauer: What?!

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. So I was like, ok. Calm down. Calm down. So I clicked and Xd out.

Juli Bauer: It’s not that bad!

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. I was like, maybe we can still recover from this. Even though I’m planning my escape plan. So I click on the last folder, it was his ex-girlfriend. And I knew her name, because he had said, oh, she clicked on your MySpace profile to check you out. So I clicked on hers, of course.

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: So I clicked on hers, and there were pictures of them having sex. And it was dated during the time that him and I had been seeing each other.

Cassy Joy: What a jerk.

Vanessa Barajas: And he told me that they had completely called things off. So, I was like. Ok dude, I’m out. This is creepy enough, but the fact that you’ve been having sex with her while we’ve been seeing each other. Luckily, him and I never slept together. We just made out and got kind of hot and heavy. But never took it to that level.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: So I was just like, dude. I’m 1000% out. I packed up my little overnight bag.

Lexi Kornblum: What did you say to him?

Vanessa Barajas: He was at work.

Lexi Kornblum: Right.

Vanessa Barajas: So I didn’t say anything. I just grabbed my stuff and I bounced and I drove home. And I had his keys, because he’s like, “if you need to leave the house for anything, I’ll just leave my housekeys with you so you can get back in.” So all of a sudden I start getting, it’s like 6 o’clock at night. I start getting all these text messages. “Where are you? I can’t get in the house. I don’t have my keys.” And I left his keys just in his room, and I was just like, peace. I’m out.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: I can’t even. And I think I was even dramatic, because I was in my 20s. So I wrote out a song lyric from the band.

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: That we first started talking over, and just left it on the bed.

Lexi Kornblum: Wait, that’s incredible.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. And then I just bounced. And finally, I want to say it was like 2 days later, I finally answered the phone when he called. And I was like, look. Sorry to ghost. I think I ghosted before ghosting was even a thing.

Juli Bauer: Yes.

Vanessa Barajas: I was like, dude. Sorry to ghost, but I explained the story. I was like, I wanted to post a picture of you and I that we took the other day. I wanted to put it on my MySpace. And I ended up going into your pictures folders, and this is what I found. And I’m just not really comfortable with that.

Juli Bauer: {laughing} Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: I understand if that’s your thing. To each their own, do you.

Juli Bauer: That’s way too nice.

Vanessa Barajas: But I’m just kind of not cool with that.

Everybody: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: This guy deserved it.

Vanessa Barajas: Besides the fact that this whole thing; even if it was just, you had this folder and it was dated a year ago or something, and I was like there are pictures of you and your ex and they’re dated during the time you and I have been seeing each other. And you specifically told me that we’re exclusive and you’re not seeing anybody else. It’s really weird for me. And he’s like, no. He totally tried to excuse generator it. He was like, no, the date on my camera is wrong. And I’m like, is it? By like, a month? Come on.

Lexi Kornblum: And why are you doing that.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: And do the girls know about it?

Cassy Joy: Yeah, do the girls know about the photos?

Vanessa Barajas: Yes, they did, because you could tell that it was they were incorporating it into the routine kind of thing.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: And it was funny too because one time we were making out, he asked if he could take pictures.

Lexi Kornblum: Well.

Juli Bauer: Who are you dating?

Vanessa Barajas: Yes! Right! I was like, I’m just not really comfortable with that. And then he kind of gave me attitude about it. And then that was kind of red flag number one. And I was like, ok. We’re just going to file that in the red flag folder.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: And we’ll come back to that if we need to.

Juli Bauer: Just like we flag our photos. Flag that memory.

Vanessa Barajas: Exactly. Exactly. And then after that, I was like, oh. That clicks. Now it makes sense. He was going to try to add a Vanessa folder. And I was like, you know what, no. I am shutting you down.

Lexi Kornblum: No Vanessa folder.

Juli Bauer: I feel no one is going to have a story that tops that. Mine is like, super quick.

Cassy Joy: Say it.

Juli Bauer: Ok. But it’s not that cool, after that. I was hanging out with this one guy. And we had gone out on two dates. And they were coffee dates. Because I did for a little bit. And they were like two coffee dates. And I was like, ok. He’s nice, whatever. And then we go to dinner, like a nice dinner. And we had had deeper conversations at that point. I was like, so what is your biggest insecurity? And he was like, well. Probably my penis size.

Vanessa Barajas: No! No!

Cassy Joy: Big or little? {laughs}

Lexi Kornblum: You hadn’t had sex yet?

Juli Bauer: No. No.

Lexi Kornblum: No, just coffee.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, just coffee. Nothing had happened. So he goes, my penis size. And I’m like, well this is awkward.

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: So I was like, yeah. Because it’s just so big. Like joking. And he was like, I wish that were the case.

Everybody: {gasp}

Juli Bauer: I was like, ok dude. You made this so uncomfortable. That’s something that you just find out on your own.

Everybody: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: And then never call again.

Everybody: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: Pick a different insecurity.

Vanessa Barajas: Terrible!

Cassy Joy: Pick a different answer.

Juli Bauer: Terrible. And so we could never bounce back from that. I never went out.

Everybody: How do you!

Juli Bauer: I know. I was like, I can’t think about anything else at this point. If you’re pointing it out.

Vanessa Barajas: This early too. That means it must be really bad. Like, I need to preface this before we even move any further.

Lexi Kornblum: That means it’s so small, it’s affected past relationships.

Vanessa Barajas: Exactly.

Juli Bauer: And that’s totally fine. You just, talk about it when you’re about to do something.

Everybody: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Not just at a nice dinner. We were at a nice dinner at a great downtown restaurant over a glass of wine. And not even 5 glasses of wine. It was like, one glass of wine. I’m like, dude. So then I never talked to him again. Probably ghosted him. I don’t really remember. And then I’ve seen him a couple of times, because he started CrossFit after that, and he was at a couple. And then he was dating someone I knew.

Vanessa Barajas: Did you ask her?

Juli Bauer: Yes! She was a traveling nurse. That would be funny if she listened to this. But she was awesome. She was super funny, and she worked out at our gym for like 3 months while she was traveling. And she was like, “Hey! I know,” his name.

Vanessa Barajas: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: She was like, I know blah-blah-blah. I was like, oh my god. And we were at the Christmas party at our gym. And everybody gets totally; and she was a huge mess. She was a blast. So I asked her, and she’s like. Yeah, it’s pretty bad. {laughing} I was like.

Vanessa Barajas: Ohh.

Juli Bauer: So sad.

Vanessa Barajas: But she didn’t care?

Juli Bauer: No. Traveling nurse. She was doing that thing.

Vanessa Barajas: She was like, whatever. She was like, YOLO.

Juli Bauer: Doing the damn thing. Yeah. YOLO.

Vanessa Barajas: They probably have toys and stuff.

Juli Bauer: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: I mean, right? If you really like someone, there’s a way you can make it work.

Juli Bauer: This podcast.

Lexi Kornblum: I think they say it’s how you use it, you know.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. You just don’t talk about it on the third date.

Lexi Kornblum: No. No.

Vanessa Barajas: For sure.

Juli Bauer: I didn’t find a file of sex photos, but. Just an awkward sex comment.

Lexi Kornblum: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: But I think about that every time. He’ll pop on my “people you may know” like on Facebook or something. And I’m like, ugh! I don’t need to know. I don’t need to know.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah. Don’t need to know.

Juli Bauer: What about you guys? Any weird dating stories at all?

Lexi Kornblum: In college, I saw this guy a few times. And he was; well, the whole thing was kind of crazy. You know, college, you’re drinking a lot. So it was winter. Winter in New England, so it was really icy.

Juli Bauer: Winter is coming.

Lexi Kornblum: So this part is embarrassing on me. But I’ll get to the embarrassing on him. So, I’m walking up the hill. I’m so drunk. I’m going to be sick I think. I fall down the ice. I slip on the ice; get up, slip again. Get up, slip again, and then throw up.

Juli Bauer: At least you don’t have far after falling.

Lexi Kornblum: I went up the hill to his house, in the drive way.

Everybody: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: So meanwhile; it was unreal. I wish it was on video. Meanwhile this guy wants to hang out with me. It’s like, a few times.

Juli Bauer: There’s your sign. He’s like, yeah, let’s hang out. You got a little throw up.

Lexi Kornblum: I just kept falling. Anyways. We hadn’t been hanging out for a bit at that point. We were fooling around. We were in his den. And then he started to; he was kind of into working out, but kind of body building or whatever. It was like, you could totally think that was his life. So we’re fooling around, and he’s calling me like cowgirl.

Everybody: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: No.

Lexi Kornblum: I was like, what’s going on. This is getting weird. So anyway.

Juli Bauer: Cowgirl? In New York?

Lexi Kornblum: Boston.

Juli Bauer: Boston! {laughs}

Lexi Kornblum: He was calling me really weird names. Like cowgirl, bull rider. I’m like, what is happening. It got real weird ok. The next morning, he’s like, you don’t want a protein shake? I wake up and he’s like, “Want a protein shake?” I’m like, no. I’m good. And you know guys, they’re really into working out they have protein shakes. They get the protein shake farts. It’s not pretty.

Everybody: Oh no.

Juli Bauer: Protein shake farts?

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah, like it just smells. They smell.

Juli Bauer: No.

Lexi Kornblum: OK well that happens.

Juli Bauer: No! Are you serious?

Lexi Kornblum: So he was really, it was not a good situation. But he was trying to force a protein shake down my throat. He was like, you have to! Why don’t you want it? It was bad. I heard him in the bathroom.

Cassy Joy: Ugh!

Vanessa Barajas: Eww.

Juli Bauer: Oh my god!

Lexi Kornblum: Like, I wasn’t cute last night. You’re not cute today.

Vanessa Barajas: It’s too early in the relationship to not be cute.

Lexi Kornblum: He was calling me cowgirl. I was like, I’m not a cowgirl. Though I do want cowboy boots.

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Yeah, Lexi wants to get cowboy boots today.

Lexi Kornblum: I do. I’m going to.

Juli Bauer: That’s on our to-do list.

Lexi Kornblum: I’ve got to go.

Juli Bauer: Just so she can live up to her name.

Lexi Kornblum: But anyway. It just got really weird. He was like protein shakes. Calling me cowgirl and bull rider.

Juli Bauer: He wanted you to have the protein shake farts.

Lexi Kornblum: He didn’t necessarily want that, but he had that. I heard it through the bathroom.

Juli Bauer: Ga-ross!

Vanessa Barajas: Eww. Dude’s farting is gross. I’m not into it.

Cassy Joy: Ugh. So nasty.

Juli Bauer: Do you have any more dating stories, Cass?

Cassy Joy: I have this one that keeps coming to mind. I have never, what is it, ghosted? It was more like an about face.

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: About faced?

Cassy Joy: You know, it’s a military turn where you turn around entirely?

Juli Bauer: What?

Cassy Joy: On a date.

Everybody: No.

Juli Bauer: Does anybody know that name?

Cassy Joy: I’m really good at words.

Juli Bauer: About faced?

Vanessa Barajas: I think you invented a new.

Cassy Joy: There are four people who may recognize it.

Juli Bauer: Four of the ten people listening? Doubtful.

Cassy Joy: Maybe 0.5. I haven’t ever really backed out on a date ever in my life. There was this guy. It was after I had dated this person who was really into outdoorsy sports. He was really cool, and we had a long relationship. But I was like; I was curious to date a very buttoned up guy. Right? Someone who is just; you know. He’s like an accountant. Or I don’t know.

Juli Bauer: Didn’t you marry an accountant?

Cassy Joy: Yes!

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: So you were really into that. That goal.

Vanessa Barajas: That is Cassy’s thing.

Cassy Joy: I was curious. So there was this group of people I was hanging out with in San Antonio of young professionals. And there was this one guy, and he was super nice. And he just seemed very put; I don’t know. Just a respectable dude, right. He was just very well groomed.

Vanessa Barajas: Clean cut.

Cassy Joy: Clean cut! That’s the word. Thank you.

Lexi Kornblum: Mature.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. So I was ready for a more mature kind of dude, right? And he was such a poser. It was so interesting. So we went on a couple of dates. And on the second or third one, we went back to his apartment. Of course, to watch a movie. And I’m so naive. I was like, yeah. Let’s go watch a movie.

Vanessa Barajas: {laughing} So you Netflix and chilled before…

Cassy Joy: I’d love to watch a movie.

Juli Bauer: I had no idea Netflix and chill meant sex.

Lexi Kornblum: I didn’t know that at all.

Juli Bauer: I just thought it meant hang out.

Lexi Kornblum: I’m like, I always Netflix and chill for real.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, by myself. All the time.

Lexi Kornblum: I Netflix and chill in my room. Yeah.

Cassy Joy: It makes perfect sense. So we get back to his apartment. We walk into the living room, and it’s like a den. So we go from very crisp, he probably got his shirt dry cleaned, perfectly brushed hair.

Lexi Kornblum: So you would think that the vibe would be that his apartment would be super nice.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. It would be the same. And I can go with the flow, right? We walk in. He’s got, his futon takes up three-quarters of his entire living room.

Juli Bauer: Futon.

Lexi Kornblum: Such a guy.

Juli Bauer: Such a dude.

Cassy Joy: And it’s laid down flat, and has so many pillows all over it. And we’re going to watch this movie, where you have to lie down.

Juli Bauer: Ugh.

Cassy Joy: Anyways. So he starts getting frisky, and I needed a minute.

Everybody: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: So I was like, I’m going to go.

Juli Bauer: I need a minute.

Cassy Joy: This is not what I; I thought we were actually going to watch a movie.

Everybody: {laughing}

Lexi Kornblum: How old were you?

Cassy Joy: I’m probably 24.

Juli Bauer: She’s like 30. I haven’t made out with a guy yet.

Cassy Joy: He was 32. I get up to go to the restroom, and this is when I was like, I have to GTFO.

Everybody: {laughing}

Cassy Joy: I walked into the bathroom.

Juli Bauer: Way to get around that cussword Cassy.

Cassy Joy: I walked into his bathroom, and you guys. Just imagine the worst possible condition.

Juli Bauer: Uggh!

Lexi Kornblum: Like moldy.

Cassy Joy: Mold. I don’t think…

Juli Bauer: College dorm.

Cassy Joy: I don’t think that his toilet was working, but he kept using it.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh man.

Juli Bauer: No!

Cassy Joy: it looked like weeks!

Vanessa Barajas: No!

Lexi Kornblum: No. {laughs}

Cassy Joy: The most obscene I’ve ever seen.

Lexi Kornblum: Did it smell so bad?

Cassy Joy: It smelled. But he had the door closed. Anyway, I just had to go to the bathroom, and then I walked out. And I was like, I’m leaving.

Vanessa Barajas: Eww!

Cassy Joy: The guy that, you clearly floss your teeth. How can you live like this!

Everybody: Eww.

Cassy Joy: So I just learned. I don’t know. It’s not always what meets the eye.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: Yes.

Juli Bauer: You married a real clean accountant.

Cassy Joy: {laughs} He is. He’s tidier than I am, that sweet man.

Juli Bauer: Really? Your house is always. When I’ve been over, it’s always clean and well kept.

Cassy Joy: Yeah. It’s probably because of Austin.

Juli Bauer: You’re a really intense cleaner, too. Everything is in its proper place.

Vanessa Barajas: It’s place. Everything has a place. Everything’s tidy.

Juli Bauer: It’s so tidy. Are you a clean person Lexi?

Lexi Kornblum: I’m clean, but I’m not super neat. I’ll have some random stuff on my desk, that’s not totally put away. But now I have the cleaning people that come and it’s the best thing ever.

Cassy Joy: Oh it’s so nice.

Juli Bauer: The best. Mine went on maternity leave to have twins. She ain’t coming back.

Lexi Kornblum: I just don’t want to scrub the damn toilets. I don’t want to do it.

Juli Bauer: No.

Lexi Kornblum: He pees all over the toilet, I don’t want to do it.

Juli Bauer: I don’t mind cleaning toilets. I do not want to clean the stovetop.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh.

Juli Bauer: I f*cking hate it. It’s like, you clean it, and then you cook a pork chop, and there’s grease everywhere.

Everybody: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: So what’s the point? And then it’s so caked on because you’re like; hmm. I’m going to cook again in 46 minutes.

Lexi Kornblum: Yes. Scrape it off.

Juli Bauer: It’s the worst. I hate cleaning.

Lexi Kornblum: I hate cleaning.

Vanessa Barajas: Mine is, I won’t do. And I told Brad this when we first started dating. I said look. I’m kind of one of those weird people where I enjoy cleaning. I don’t mind it. It’s kind of almost therapeutic. You just put music on, go to town, do your thing. But I will not clean the bathtub. I hate cleaning bathtubs.

Juli Bauer: Oh! The shower and bathtub suck.

Vanessa Barajas: It’s just got the grime.

Juli Bauer: Film.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. And you just can’t get it off, no matter how much scrubbing bubbles you use.

Juli Bauer: I know. And scrubbing bubbles smells so gross.

Vanessa Barajas: It’s the worst.

Juli Bauer: When the foam ignites.

Vanessa Barajas: So I told him. I’ll clean the rest of the bathroom. I’ll clean the toilet all day. But I’m not cleaning the bathtub. So if you want that clean, you’re going to clean it yourself. So that’s the one. I won’t clean that.

Lexi Kornblum: He does it?

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah, he does it no problem. He gets in there, cleans it, and then takes a shower while he’s doing it.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh that’s good.

Vanessa Barajas: He has no problem with it. The other thing I won’t clean is the oven.

Juli Bauer: Oh yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: I refuse.

Lexi Kornblum: That’s why they have the steam. You just put a little water and push a button.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: No, my oven. I don’t have just a self-cleaning oven.

Lexi Kornblum: Ok.

Vanessa Barajas: You would need the gloves and the degreaser. And I refuse. So my oven is filthy.

Juli Bauer: Mine too.

Vanessa Barajas: Which means it cooks totally unevenly, because there is stuff that’s caked on over stuff that’s caked on.

Lexi Kornblum: Mm-hmm.

Juli Bauer: I never thought about that.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. It totally makes a difference. And he’s like, will you please clean the oven. You need to do that, because you made an entire cookbook.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: And I didn’t really use the oven. So you need to clean that. And I was like, I’ll hire someone to clean it.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, just hire someone to just do that.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: Sometimes with the cleaning people, I’ll add on an extra thing. And I’ll be like, can you do…

Vanessa Barajas: Like the fridge or something.

Lexi Kornblum: The fridge, can you do the oven, whatever.

Juli Bauer: And they have apps. What are those apps where you can hire.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah there’s like TaskRabbit and Handybook. Handybook is a good one.

Juli Bauer: Just pay someone to just clean your oven.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Do you; now that your cookbook is done. How often do you bake?

Vanessa Barajas: Like zero to never.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, I bet.

Vanessa Barajas: Serious. I just.

Juli Bauer: How many dessert recipes do you have in your cookbook?

Vanessa Barajas: Well, I would say. I mean, the whole cookbook has over 150 recipes. And I would say I have probably about 20 savory recipes in there. So the rest would be dessert recipes.

Cassy Joy: Amazing.

Lexi Kornblum: Now, did you eat them all or did you give them away?

Vanessa Barajas: No. Oh my god.

Juli Bauer: Would you just taste and then give.

Vanessa Barajas: Exactly. Obviously, during development I would taste everything. And a lot of recipes. One of my favorite recipes in the book is the better than boxed brownies.

Lexi Kornblum: Those are really good.

Vanessa Barajas: That took probably three or four times to get everything right. Like the sugar amount. Because it was either too much, or there wasn’t enough. So I would have to takes those. And you have to pinpoint. What is this missing? I know it needs something, but I don’t’ know what it is.

Juli Bauer: You’re really good at that. Whenever you eat any sort of food, I can tell how you’re thinking about exactly. You process everything. I’m just like, mm. It tastes good. Bye.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. But I’m analyzing it scientifically. I’m like, hmm. Where is this flavor coming from?

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: So yeah. My coworkers loved me. Because I would come in with all this stuff all the time. I would bring three or four recipes into work that I developed over the weekend. And people would just eat it. And it was actually cool, because you could see people that ate real non-gluten free paleo foods.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah, like good taste testers.

Vanessa Barajas: Like, if they really liked it or not. And they’d be like, oh my god, this is so good. And then when I was making my soft batch chocolate chip cookies, I had the testers in different Ziploc baggies. Like, this is A, B, C, and D. I need you to taste each of these and tell me which one you liked the best. So a lot of stuff trying to get other people involved with it.

Juli and I were actually just talking about this yesterday. Sometimes when you make a recipe, you just need to make it to photograph it and put something on the blog, right? And then maybe it’s some time when I’m not going to see anybody or a whole bunch of people. So to get it out of the house so I don’t eat it, I have to throw it away in the trash. And then I told Juli; “And then I just pour water on it because otherwise I’ll just go into the trash and start eating it out of the trash!”

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: And Juli’s like, water? You’ve got to do soap.

Lexi Kornblum: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: Yeah, I will still go back in.

Vanessa Barajas: You can still eat it. It’s soggy; it’s fine.

Cassy Joy: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: I can still eat it. Soggy chocolate.

Vanessa Barajas: So I was like, ooh. Soap. So it’s wasteful sometimes.

Lexi Kornblum: I know.

Vanessa Barajas: But sometimes you’ve just got to do it.

Juli Bauer: And I give my stuff away. But sometimes, if it’s gone past the point. With paleo baked goods where it’s gone past the point that you want to give it to anybody, and you’re like; I don’t want people to think this is how it tastes. I’m like, trash, soap, out. I’m out.

Lexi Kornblum: Like, I was testing a banana bread so many times. And it stinks because I’m eating the batches that aren’t good because I have to try it. And I’m like; nah, if I eat one more piece of banana bread.

Juli Bauer: I know.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: And Mike’s like, get this out of the house because I don’t want to be eating this all day.

Juli Bauer: Do you guys have a recipe from any of your books or your websites that is your go-to? So it could be a dessert, or it can be an entrée or a side dish. Or even a cocktail recipe that you make when you’re having house guests over or a party of whatever. Do you have your go-to recipes?

Lexi Kornblum: I have two.

Juli Bauer: What’s yours, Lexi.

Lexi Kornblum: When I do brunch, when people come over, I always do my waffles or pancakes.

Juli Bauer: Oh, they’re the best!

Lexi Kornblum: They’re fluffy, they’re the real deal. But then summer, the Mexican street corn salad that I just put on my blog.

Vanessa Barajas: Oh, it looks so good.

Lexi Kornblum: I make that every time we have people over.

Juli Bauer: What all is in it?

Lexi Kornblum: It’s corn, you could grill it. I get local corn. Do the best you can, people.

Juli Bauer: {laughs} Stop f*cking judging.

Lexi Kornblum: Good quality mayo. A ton of spices. You could do the optional feta or cotija cheese.

Juli Bauer: So good.

Lexi Kornblum: And just all this stuff. It flies off the table. So that’s my summer side salad go to. And at brunch, the pancake girl.

Juli Bauer: Those are so good. Highly recommend to anybody those. I love those so much. What about you, Ness?

Lexi Kornblum: You made them all. You share them online. Yeah, yeah.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, I shared them on my blog.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah. People are always like, “Thanks Juli!”

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: I don’t have a waffle iron.

Juli Bauer: What?! I have two.

Lexi Kornblum: Registry item.

Juli Bauer: I got mine at a thrift store.

Vanessa Barajas: Did you, ok.

Lexi Kornblum: I like the le Creuset one. It’s a good one.

Juli Bauer: I’s a little sketch.

Lexi Kornblum: I’ve had a few, and the le Creuset one doesn’t; I’ve had a few that get destroyed. Everything sticks to it. This one is amazing.

Vanessa Barajas: Ok.

Lexi Kornblum: And it’s a registry item because it’s a little more than you’d want to spend on a waffle iron.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. Ok.

Lexi Kornblum: It’s like $90 or something.

Juli Bauer: Or get it at a thrift store.

Vanessa Barajas: See, that’s a great idea. And you got your little donut maker.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh. I don’t use a donut maker. I just use a donut pan. Is the donut maker good?

Juli Bauer: I like the donut maker because then it evenly cooks on both sides.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah, it makes it round.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, so you get the crispy. And they’re little baby ones.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah, they’re super cute.

Lexi Kornblum: So cute.

Vanessa Barajas: I would say for me, mine’s obviously always going to be a dessert because we know how I feel about dessert. But I would definitely; my chocolate molten lava cakes.

Juli Bauer: The best.

Vanessa Barajas: That’s my favorite dessert of all time. And it’s easy to whip together. And I feel like it’s just kind of impressive when you serve it to people.

Lexi Kornblum: That would be intimidating to make that. I want to see you make it.

Vanessa Barajas: It’s super easy. It’s like…

Lexi Kornblum: But do a video.

Vanessa Barajas: A video.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah!

Vanessa Barajas: I don’t even have any kind of; it would be with my phone.

Juli Bauer: I know. I don’t know how to do it.

Vanessa Barajas: I don’t have any kind of set up.

Lexi Kornblum: You’ve done them.

Juli Bauer: I’ve done it; you guys have the overhead. I have to do it with a tripod.

Lexi Kornblum: Do you have a tripod?

Juli Bauer: As high as I can. I don’t have the thing that goes over. So I just do it at an angle. As high as I can get it, and then it comes down this way. But I don’t know how to do any of that sh*t.

Lexi Kornblum: I’ll show you.

Juli Bauer: You guys are standing on tables and sh*t like that.

Lexi Kornblum: I put my board on the floor.

Juli Bauer: Oh yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: And then I have my tripod.

Cassy Joy: That is much smarter than mine.

Lexi Kornblum: And I have these two lights. Not a big crazy light set up. I’ll show you.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, you’re making it sound really hard.

Lexi Kornblum: No, no. It’s not. It’s easy.

Juli Bauer: You’re like, ok, so I have this tripod, and then I put it all on the floor. And then I have 6 lights, and then I film this, and then my assistant brings this in. It’s really easy.

Lexi Kornblum: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: It’s like, ok. My dog would eat it off the floor.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh, we bribe him away from it.

Juli Bauer: That’s smart.

Cassy Joy: That’s so much smarter. I’m sorry, I have to take my chandelier and put it up high. Because I was like…

Lexi Kornblum: Oh my gosh, do it on the floor right by the light.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. I need to do that set up a little bit more. Do you have a favorite recipe, Cass?

Cassy Joy: I do. I use; so I have this. I think it’s in my book. Every time I have for breakfast, for whatever reason, I feel like I cook for more people for breakfast than anything. I have this chorizo scramble that I do.

Juli Bauer: Yum.

Vanessa Barajas: That sounds so good.

Juli Bauer: What’s your chorizo?

Lexi Kornblum: Isn’t that what you made us? Oh no, you made us a casserole.

Cassy Joy: Oh I made you a casserole.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah, that was really good.

Cassy Joy: I can’t even remember the name of it right now. It’s one I can get down here in Texas from HEB for any Texas people listening. But the ingredients are great. It’s just pork, and it says gluten free on the front. But it’s not a health nut brand, if that makes any sense.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Cassy Joy: And just vinegar and spices. It lists what spices. But I just crumble the chorizo, add in some scrambled eggs, and I will put in a little lime juice.

Lexi Kornblum: Mm. That’s like your go-to.

Cassy Joy: I do. I love lime juice.

Juli Bauer: Me too. And cilantro.

Cassy Joy: Lots of cilantro.

Vanessa Barajas: Yes girl!

Lexi Kornblum: That’s Cassy.

Juli Bauer: Does everybody like cilantro here.

Vanessa Barajas: It’s probably my favorite.

Lexi Kornblum: I don’t get when people say it tastes like soap because obviously it doesn’t taste like that.

Juli Bauer: Uh no.

Vanessa Barajas: That’s like a genetic thing.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah. But it’s a real thing. People are like, can’t eat it.

Juli Bauer: Brian doesn’t like it. He doesn’t think it tastes like soap, he just doesn’t like it. And that’s the only thing. I think it makes a meal taste so much better. Like steak with just cilantro on top tastes so good.

Lexi Kornblum: Right. Like the Mexican street corn salad with cilantro amazing. Without, it’s great. But it needs that little kick.

Cassy Joy: it does.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, I hate people who don’t like cilantro. I hate them.

Vanessa Barajas: Don’t try to be friends with us if you don’t like cilantro.

Juli Bauer: No. Lime and cilantro; go-to.

Cassy Joy: Right.

Lexi Kornblum: Yep.

Juli Bauer: I have to pee so bad.

Everybody: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: I just can’t handle. Look at all these drinks. And this little essence kind of reminds you of pee in a way.

Cassy Joy: I keep catching it out of the corner of my eye, and I think the room is on fire.

Juli Bauer: It does look like the room is on fire. We have this little; what’s it called?

Lexi Kornblum: Essential oil diffuser.

Juli Bauer: Essential oil diffuser in the corner that smells really good. But I have to pee so bad. So this is perfect timing that we’re all together. Because we have a special announcement.

Lexi Kornblum: We do!

Juli Bauer: We’re coming out with an eBook for all the four of us.

Cassy Joy: What?!

Vanessa Barajas: Whooo!

Cassy Joy: Oh just kidding.

Juli Bauer: Like, you’re part of it. What you mean what.

Vanessa Barajas: We’re like, you’ve been on the conference calls. You know what’s going on.

Everybody: {laughing}

Juli Bauer: All the conference calls we forgot about and we’re late to.

Vanessa Barajas: You guys, we totally had a conference call scheduled and literally all four of us. Actually, Lexi I think remembered. And she’s like, is anyone jumping on this call? And we were like, oh.

Lexi Kornblum: Way to not put it in your calendar.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, we suck. So we decided we wanted to all do an eBook together with some of our favorite recipes.

Lexi Kornblum: New recipes.

Juli Bauer: Yes, new recipes. We’ve never made. And we just wanted to do a seasonal inspired.

Lexi Kornblum: Entertaining. So it’s going to be how to host, and full-on dinner parties for each season. It’s going to be amazing.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. And we all went in on different recipes for each season. So Cassy would take an appetizer and a dessert, and Lexi would have the entrée and a drink. And we all put different recipes into each season. So we’re working on that right now. Not sure when it’s going to come out. But, now that we announce it, then we’ll stay on top of it. Because it’s out on the Interwebz.

Lexi Kornblum: We’re thinking January 2018.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. January. F*ck, time is going by fast.

Vanessa Barajas: We’re excited about it. I think it’s going to be really cool. We’ve worked on the menu together to make sure that everything flows well.

Lexi Kornblum: Balanced.

Vanessa Barajas: And it’s going to be really cool for each season; winter, spring, summer, and fall. We’re going to have a main course, an appetizer, a side.

Lexi Kornblum: Multiple sides.

Vanessa Barajas: A dessert. It’s going to be really good. And it’s going to be something that you can just go to and pull out if you’ve got people coming over. Figure out what season it is. We’re just trying to simplify the process. We’re really excited, but it’s going to be. We get to meet, first of all, to take pictures for it again. So we get to see each other again this year. Which is exciting. But I’m just super excited about it. I think we’ve always kind of wanted to collaborate on something together. But then it was kind of like, what are we going to do? And then of course we didn’t want to do another cookbook because we’re all still exhausted from writing our cookbooks. But I’m really excited about it.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah. And also, the thing I love about it is I know I’m going to open it up and be like, “Oh, I want this for dinner.” Even if it’s not a dinner party or anything.

Juli Bauer: Yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: It’s enough; there’s so much that you can have it for any time of day. Well, any meal or a dinner party, which is for you yourself.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. It will be pretty awesome.

Cassy Joy: I’m excited about it.

Juli Bauer: Yes. So look out for that. We’ll keep you updated while we’re going through it. I’m glad we got to talk about it here. So before we wrap it up, so I can use the restroom. Because I’m going to explode. I want everybody to tell me what their favorite thing is right now. It could be a product your loving. It could be food related. It could be an exercise. It could be meditation. If you really want it to be that. It could be a pot or a pan. It literally can be whatever.

Lexi Kornblum: I know mine.

Juli Bauer: Ok Lexi you start it off.

Lexi Kornblum: it’s the beach waver curling iron.

Juli Bauer: Oh yes.

Lexi Kornblum: So let me back up by saying I literally can’t do my hair. And I got this curling iron. It’s like you put your hair on the bottom, and you push the button left to right and it curls it up for you. So you obviously go the opposite way. And it’s a game changer.

Juli Bauer: Awesome.

Lexi Kornblum: We’ll have to link to it. It’s so good, it’s on Amazon or random places. But it’s amazing. I couldn’t do my hair until I got this thing.

Juli Bauer: And your hair looked beautiful last night when you used it.

Lexi Kornblum: It was a long sweaty day yesterday.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. We were in our AirBNB, and the hot water wasn’t working. So we all took like 4 second showers.

Lexi Kornblum: Couldn’t wash our hair.

Juli Bauer: And I used the grease to grease my hair back in a pony. Kardashian style. That’s my new look. But yours worked out. Yours didn’t look greasy. A lot of dry shampoo.

Lexi Kornblum: A lot of dry shampoo.

Juli Bauer: Yeah! Just cake it on.

Lexi Kornblum: It’s like basically white. {laughs}

Juli Bauer: {laughs} What about you, Vaness?

Vanessa Barajas: Ok, so besides my engagement ring.

Everybody: {laughs}

Vanessa Barajas: My favorite thing ever.

Lexi Kornblum: Best accessory.

Vanessa Barajas: Mine’s kind of lame. I feel like it’s just my Fitbit. I’m obsessed with my Fitbit.

Juli Bauer: You have different.

Vanessa Barajas: I have different bands, so I interchange my bands.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh. That’s cool.

Vanessa Barajas: According to what I’m doing. So if I workout, I have workout bands, different colors. So I can match, accessorize. And then when we go out, I have a really pretty rose gold one that I wear.

Juli Bauer: It’s so cute.

Vanessa Barajas: So it just dresses it up a little bit. But I really like it. I know some people don’t because they feel too obsessive with it.

Lexi Kornblum: I get obsessive. And then I’ve washed three of mine in the washing machine.

Vanessa Barajas: Like, they’re like, oh my god I’ve got to get to 10,000 steps.

Juli Bauer: Are you serious?

Lexi Kornblum: Well because I have the clip on one.

Vanessa Barajas: Oh the little clip on ones, yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: Literally me and Mike both washed two each. And I was like, that’s it.

Juli Bauer: Yeah, no more.

Cassy Joy: No mas.

Juli Bauer: I would get too obsessed with it, for sure.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah. I don’t know. I just like to see how I slept the night before.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh yeah, that’s cool.

Vanessa Barajas: I like to just see what my activity level is for the day. And then if anything, I feel like it pushes me to do more than maybe I normally would. Because I can be like, “Oh, I’m only X amount of steps away from this.”

Lexi Kornblum: How many steps do you like to get in a day?

Vanessa Barajas: I always try to do the 10,000. Always try to reach that for sure, but then I get really excited on days where. I live by this really nice lake. And it’s 5 miles if you walk around the whole lake.

Juli Bauer: Damn.

Vanessa Barajas: So I like those days when I get to 10,000 steps before I even leave work for the day, and then I’ll go walk the lake, which is another 10,000.

Lexi Kornblum: Wow. That’s amazing.

Juli Bauer: Damn.

Vanessa Barajas: So after everything is said and done, I’ll look and it’s like 23,000 for the day. And I’m like, “Boyah!”

Lexi Kornblum: You know, they have a health app on the phone which tracks your steps. But you have to be holding your phone.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah.

Lexi Kornblum: So it’s good on a day where you’re exploring a new city or something. But at the gym, it doesn’t really help you.

Vanessa Barajas: Exactly. And then it’s cool too, because it tells you when your text message come through. So then if you’re at dinner or in a meeting or something, you’re not rude checking your phone. It just looks like you’re kind of checking your watch. It’s kind of like the iWatch.

Lexi Kornblum: I didn’t know it tells you when you get a text message.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah, it tells you text messages, calls, calendar.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh, a calendar feature is pretty cool if you have meetings all day.

Vanessa Barajas: Exactly. So it will buzz and then you look and you’re like, oh crap, I have a meeting in 15 minutes. So that really helps me. And then it also has a buzzer that goes off to tell me when I’m supposed to go to bed. So you can get it for whatever time. I’ve got mine set for 9:30, so as soon as it buzzes I’m like, ok I need to go upstairs and get in bed.

And then I also just like the kind of social aspect that’s involved. Because they have an app. The app is probably the best user experience app. I kind of geek out on stuff like that. But it’s just so well put together. So you can add friends on there, and then you can track your steps with your friend, so you can see; “Oh, Cassy is at 10,000, I’m going to try to beat her and get 12,000 a day.” You can do challenges with people. So you have a work week challenge or a weekend warrior challenge. And you also get these really cool badges. So every time you get to a different level to be like; you just walked the length of India.

Lexi Kornblum: Oh, that’s cool.

Vanessa Barajas: Your lifetime steps are 4 million blah, blah. Yeah, so you get these kinds of fun facts. Or if you walk up flights of stairs, it’s like, “You just did the Eiffel tower. You get the Eiffel tower badge. You’ve walked up 3,000 flights of stairs.” Something like that. I think it’s really cool. It’s just kind of like all your stuff in one spot. I’ve just been realizing how much I love it lately and I just don’t want to live without it. To the point where I literally have a Fitbit tan on my wrist, which is really cute by the way.

Juli Bauer: So cute.

Lexi Kornblum: So cute.

Juli Bauer: Are you going to get rid of that by your wedding?

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah.

Juli Bauer: Are you going to wear your Fitbit on your wedding day?

Vanessa Barajas: See, I’m like, I can’t miss out on steps.

Juli Bauer: Yeah. Yeah. You’re like; you’d get photos done, and you’re like, I can’t move. Put my watch back on.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah, exactly. I have one of my friends, Rhonda, jokes with me. Because we’ll do challenges together. And I’m like; Ugh! I wish it was waterproof so I could get my steps in the shower.

Everybody: {laughing}

Vanessa Barajas: So I totally just geek out. But for my wedding; you know, I’m not even going to bring it on vacation because it’s not waterproof and I don’t want to accidentally jump in water.

Lexi Kornblum: Do they have a waterproof one?

Vanessa Barajas: They’re trying. That’s the big debacle right now, is their stock keeps going down. The company itself isn’t doing really well.

Cassy Joy: No way.

Vanessa Barajas: Because they can’t compete with the iWatch, or the Apple watch, whatever. Because that is waterproof. They’re trying to come out with their own version of the Apple watch, but they can’t the waterproof thing down. So they do have some Fitbits that are waterproof, like the smaller ones. They have the Charge HR2, but I think if you get the Flex ones, maybe even the smaller, Alta HR, those might be waterproof.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah, those definitely. Because I’ve washed those puppies and it did not work.

Vanessa Barajas: {laughs} I’m not going to wear it on my wedding, just so you guys know. Just so we know, in this room. And everybody, the three people listening to the podcast.

Juli Bauer: Yes. Ok.

Vanessa Barajas: Because nothing can detract from the ring.

Juli Bauer: So true.

Lexi Kornblum: Or your dress. Or you.

Vanessa Barajas: Yeah, exactly.

Juli Bauer: Are you going to do your own hair and makeup?

Vanessa Barajas: Yes.

Juli Bauer: Duh.

Cassy Joy: You’re so good at it.

Lexi Kornblum: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: Thanks.

Juli Bauer: Cass, what’s your favorite thing?

Cassy Joy: I just had to text my project manager to ask her what the name of it was.

Juli Bauer: Oh. {laughs} She’s just texting over here. We’re like, Vanessa’s story isn’t interesting enough?

Everybody: {laughs}

Cassy Joy: Sorry, so rude. So whenever I get online and I’m working. Because a lot of our job is online, right? You have to Google things. And especially with the fashion stuff. I’m constantly on all these different websites. And I get so distracted. Right? You have 47 tabs open, and you’re like, what was I doing? I always have to ask myself that. And there’s this new app that works with Chrome. Have y’all heard of it? It’s called momentum.

Everybody: No.

Cassy Joy: It’s so cool! So, Amber told me about it. You pull up momentum; dot com I’m sure. On Chrome, the browser. And what it is does is it have you create a quick profile, super quick. And it has you every single day it brings up this beautiful photo. And it shows the clock in the center of the screen, and it has you create a to-do list.

Lexi Kornblum: I love it.

Cassy Joy: And it has you write in the middle of the screen, what’s your main focus for the day? What is the one thing you’ve got to get done today. So if it’s a Monday, I’m usually like, podcast. {laughs} And then it has you type in all of the other to-dos. And then every time you open a new browser, or a new window on chrome, it will show you your to-do list kind of at the bottom corner. So it reminds you. So if you’re ever like, what was I doing again? You have that kind of in front of you.

Lexi Kornblum: That’s really cool.

Vanessa Barajas: That’s cool.

Juli Bauer: That’s awesome.

Cassy Joy: It’s so neat. And you can just check them off, and things move up. And if you check off your main focus, I think it will just pull from the list again. But it’s really helped productivity, because when you have 47 plates spinning in the air, it’s just nice to kind of have your finger on the pulse of whatever your supposed to be doing.

Juli Bauer: That’s very cool.

Lexi Kornblum: I suck and use Safari.

Juli Bauer: I do too.

Lexi Kornblum: I know Safari is terrible, but I’m just used to it.

Juli Bauer: I use Safari, too.

Lexi Kornblum: I need to make the switch, because I’d really like that.

Cassy Joy: Yeah.

Vanessa Barajas: What about you, Juli?

Juli Bauer: Ok. I have to get out of this room because I’m about to pee in my pants. So, my favorite thing right now is Terra chips. They have the new plantain chips that are cooked in coconut oil, and they are so good. They have sweet and they have savory. Ok?

Cassy Joy: Love it!

Vanessa Barajas: Ok.

Juli Bauer: Ok.

Vanessa Barajas: We’ll get a bag.

Juli Bauer: I’ve missed you guys. I’m so glad you’re here. I hope nobody turned this podcast off. They’re like; what the f*ck are these b*tches talking about. Anyways. But thank you guys so much for taking the time out of your vacation to be on my podcast, on a Friday afternoon.

Vanessa Barajas: Like we had a choice.

Everybody: {laughs}

Juli Bauer: That’s true. 100% did not. Just like you having to take photos of me last night at dinner.

Vanessa Barajas: Which I loved. I love it!

Juli Bauer: I’m such an annoying friend. So thanks for listening guys.

Lexi Kornblum: It was so fun.

Juli Bauer: Thanks for being on, guys.

Cassy Joy: Thanks for having us.

Vanessa Barajas: Thanks.

Juli Bauer: I am going to explode. I’ll talk to you guys soon. Bye-bye for now!

Everybody: Bye-bye!!

While in Austin, I recorded a podcast with Lexi from Lexi’s Clean Kitchen, Cassy from Fed & Fit and Vanessa from Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind and we talked about a lot of girl things, awkward dating stories and inappropriate […] While in Austin, I recorded a podcast with Lexi from Lexi’s Clean Kitchen, Cassy from Fed & Fit and Vanessa from Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind and we talked about a lot of girl things, awkward dating stories and inappropriate […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:00:20
Santa Ynez Trip + My Latest Favorite Things – Episode 43: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sun, 16 Jul 2017 15:06:35 +0000 10 Chatting about my recent trip to Santa Ynez Valley (which I’ll be recapping on the blog soon) and some of my favorite things that I seem to be using daily in my own life! Tula Products HiQ CoQ10 Andalou Face […] Chatting about my recent trip to Santa Ynez Valley (which I’ll be recapping on the blog soon) and some of my favorite things that I seem to be using daily in my own life!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 43 Transcription!

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

1. Santa Ynez Valley trip [2:04]
2. Upcoming travel plans [15:07]
3. Favorites for beauty [25:12]
4. Favorites for food [30:04]
5. Traveling solo [36:57]
6. Favorites for fashion [40:48]
7. The Bachelorette [45:22]

Juli Bauer: Well good morning. It is Sunday, July something. And I usually record on Thursday or Fridays, and then post the podcast on Saturday. But I was traveling all last week. And then I got back to town, and wanted to hang out with my sister-in-law. And one of my friends just went through major back surgery, and she’s so badass. So I just wanted to bring her food. So I just made them a bunch of food. So that just kind of took up the time that I was supposed to be doing my podcast. But sometimes friends are just more important, you know? I know not to you, who are listening. And you wait for the podcast on Saturday. Maybe you’re just listening to all this and know no different. But I apologize to anybody who waits on Saturdays for the podcast. But friends are just pretty rad. And I couldn’t record earlier in the week, because I was doing so many things. In. Santa Ynez Valley.

So it’s Sunday. My husband on the couch watching ESPN sports recap stuff. So I’m sitting on the floor of our bedroom. Because as right now, the dog’s coming in, and he’ll just play this game. Because he doesn’t like the door being shut. So he’ll come in, and mosey around, and see that I’m super boring in the bedroom, and then he’ll want to leave and he’ll whine at the door. So it’s just really annoying. He just brought a bone in here. So apologies now if you can hear that annoying sound. This dog.

1. Santa Ynez Valley trip [2:04]

So anyways. I just got back into town from Santa Ynez Valley, and you guys. It is seriously one of the coolest places I have ever been. I had never even heard of this place. I don’t know a ton about California, because it’s the most gigantic state ever. But I know I hate going to LAX, and I hate being in LA. And even a lot of other spots that I go to are just a little bit too busy. Because Denver is like that too, now. So just going to another state, or another city to sit in more traffic is not what I think of when I want to be on vacation.

So, this trip; I work with a ton of visitor bureaus to showcase their city. So they will set up an itinerary of things that would interest me and my readers. So mine are wellness and food related. So I worked with the visit bureau of Santa Ynez Valley, and you fly into Santa Barbara. Which Santa Barbara is the best airport ever. Why can’t all airports be like that? There’s, I don’t know, 6 gates. Nobody is there. It’s so easy. You just check your luggage. You get your luggage in 14 seconds. It’s so easy, and calm, and beautiful, and well-kept. It’s just awesome.

So you fly in Santa Barbara, which is easy breezy. And then there’s a lot of fires going on right now in California, so I had to take the longer drive from Santa Barbara to Santa Ynez. But that is like 45 minutes instead of 25 minutes, so it’s really not a big deal. Sometimes to go 7 miles, it takes me 45 minutes to go to downtown, Denver. So that was awesome. Because you drive by the coast. So it’s a beautiful drive. There’s no traffic. It’s just calm. So It’s very calming. So I drove to Santa Ynez the long way. And the valley is made up of all these little towns. I had no idea when I got there what it was really like. But I went straight to Solvang, which is like this little Danish town. It seriously reminds me of Epcot in Disney World. Because all the buildings are Danish style buildings. Even, you’ll have Thai food and it’s in a Danish style building. They have their HOA pretty strict there, obviously.

So, we, meaning me. I was solo on this trip. So I drove into Solvang. I checked into Hotel Corque. So that was really close to just downtown area. And you can walk everywhere downtown. (My dog is bringing the bone closer and closer.) So the downtown area is super walkable. And it has a bunch of little shops. It’s like very touristy shops. So they have lots of little shops, like gift shops. They have a sh*t ton of Danish chocolate shops and bakeries. Which, I was like, there’s no way they’re going to have gluten-free. And they’re not a gluten free strict bakery, by any means. But they had gluten-free options at one of them that I went to. I’m forgetting off the top of my head. But I’m going to have a blog post all about my travels there and the restaurants I go to.

So, I was able to get this dessert called the Sara. And it’s named off of a woman, and I’m forgetting the full name. But there was a cookie cloaked; I’m going to sued for that from Twix. But it’s drenched in chocolate, and it was so good. So good. And it was gluten free, which was cool. They had like 5 different gluten free options. So I went there twice, to get coffee, and then I got a muffin there, as well, and it was awesome. So it was nice to have a couple of gluten free options in walking distance. And then I went to a bunch of restaurants. Like two; maybe just one restaurant in Solvang.

And then the other town I went to was Santa Ynez. And that was even smaller than Solvang. It was like one block of different shops and restaurants. I went to an amazing restaurant called S.Y. Kitchen there. And then I went to a CrossFit gym there, and a Pilates studio. And the CrossFit gym was awesome. I’ve been in the CrossFit community for 7 or more years at this point, so you kind of know what the feeling is going to be like in a CrossFit gym, but you don’t know what the people are going to be like. And the people are really what make the difference there. And in this town, everybody knows each other. Everybody’s friends with each other, hopefully. And everybody was so nice. I was in a class of almost all women; there was one man. And all the women. A bunch of them had already read my blog, and followed me. And they were so sweet. One woman gave me earrings. I need to post it on my Instagram, because they are so cute. And she makes them herself.

Then, I also went to a Pilates studio. The owner, I believe her name was Jessica, off the top of my head. Was so cool. She’s from Alaska. And she opened a Pilates studio there. And she really wants to move to Denver. So I’m obviously in great support of that. So I need to email her and tell her to move here, and open a Pilates studio. Because that would be pretty rad. So Pilates was really fun. I still like CrossFit and Orange Theory more. I love that style of just feeling like you’re going to die in a workout. Pilates is much more kind of controlled. It just gets those tinier muscles, which I really like. And I feel like I get that with Barre. But I more so like, for my regular workout, CrossFit style or Orange Theory. But if I had a Pilates studio nearby that I would like to go to, I would go to that on a regular basis too. Just to get those tiny muscles. Like you do in Barre, as well. But it was so much fun.

And then I went to a town called Buellton. And you know, all these towns are like within 8 minutes of each other. You end up in another town in not even that long. And I went to a place called Industrial Eats there, and they have really cool, creative dishes. Because they have beef tongue. It’s a butcher shop, they use kind of all parts of the animal in really creative, and fresh ways. So I love that. The only thing is they don’t have air conditioning. But they have a big fan. But they have two big woodfire ovens. Because they make pizzas there. Which, I’m so bummed. I found out they make gluten-free pizza after I left. But they don’t have air conditioning, and I was about to die. I had jeans and a tank top on. But I just sat down, and I was so close to the woodfire pit, or whatever in there. It was super hot in there. But the food was awesome.

And then probably my favorite, by far my favorite was Los Olivos. So I stayed in Los Olivos the last two nights. Stayed in Solvang the first two, and Los Olivos the second two. And Los Olivos is the cutest town ever. It’s like a population of 1100 or so. And there are 30 wine tastings in like 2 square blocks. It’s amazing. It’s cool. All the people are so incredibly nice there. It’s a place where you don’t lock your doors. You don’t take your car keys in, you leave them in your car. And that’s so different here. When I was leaving town, I was, to my husband, I was like, “Make sure you set our alarm every day. Make sure you double check all the doors.” Because our neighbor is like selling drugs. So I’m not trusting all the folks that he’s bringing in. I’m not anti-drugs, believe me. But you’re not bringing the savoriest characters in when you’re selling drugs at 15 years old. I’m not sure what to do about that. If there are any cops out there, feel free to message me. Let me know.

But anyways, I trust no one. Especially in Denver. We’ve had break in in our neighborhood. I’ve had my car stolen years ago. You just don’t trust anybody. And nobody looks up and smiles. So just being in a town where everybody smiles. Everybody wants to know everybody’s name. Everybody wants to support each other. It’s just so cool. I was traveling solo the whole time, and I struck up so many conversations with random people. And it wasn’t f*cking weird. These were just nice people wanting to talk to you, and have a conversation, and enjoy their day at the coffee shop. And it was so cool to be around people like that. You just don’t get that really in Denver as much.

So I stayed in Los Olivos at the Fess Parker Inn. So if you guys. (Jackson, f*ck.) So the Fess Parker Inn was started by Fess Parker, and he is, this is kind of past my time. But I know this person is. But Davy Crockett, who wore the coonskin cap. So that’s Fess Parker. And they have this giant ranch in Los Olivos. And they have a giant ranch, and then they have an Inn that’s like a 19-room boutique hotel that is seriously one of my favorite hotels of all time. I feel so lucky I got to stay there. It was stunning. Seriously stunning. And they have a farm to table restaurant now, because they’re raising their own cattle, and chickens, and goat. They’re raising everything on their farm, and growing their own vegetables, so they can do this farm to table restaurant.

And they’re still growing it. Still coming, so they can actually do the whole restaurant. But the food was so amazing at this Fess Parker Inn. And it’s called the Bear and Star. And the chef, named John Cox, was just so excited about. He was kind of shy, and then he would start talking about food, and farming, and farm to table, and he would just light up. And his whole personality would come to life. It was really cool.

So, I got to stay at the Fess Parker Inn, and I got to do a horseback tour of their winery. So Fess Parker, he just passed away. But his granddaughter runs the ranch now, with her husband, who used to be a bull rider. Total cowboy and cowgirl, just super cool people. And they showed us around the ranch on horseback. Like 2 hours on horseback. And then I ended up going out; we did a wine tasting, as well. Because they have a huge winery. And then we did a wine tasting, then we went out to dinner at the Bear and Star. I was supposed to do that by myself, and they tagged along because it was just a fun day. And they’re just cool people. Just easy to get along with.

What else. I went to a ton of wine tastings. And I got to see big wine tastings, like sun stone, which is a huge winery. And then I got to do story of soil, which is one woman just creating her own wine, which was pretty rad. So I got to see a real difference in big man to little many type industry. It was just so fun. All the restaurants out there are amazing. The people are amazing. The hotel, the service, the customer service. Everything was all amazing the entire time. Everybody was so friendly. It was just so much freaking fun. So yeah, it was amazing. I couldn’t have asked for a better trip. I highly recommend anyone to go there. I might be going to Santa Barbara in November, and I think I might extend my trip and go back out to Santa Ynez and Los Olivos and visit that farm again, and visit the cowgirl and cowboy and hang out with them again. Because it was just one of the best times. It was so much fun. F*ck, it was so fun you guys.

2. Upcoming travel plans [15:07]

I have just so much travel coming up right now. I just got back on Friday, and I leave again on Thursday. And this time I’m going to Austin. I’m hanging out with the people behind Siete Foods. Which I’ve talked about them, probably on My Favorite Things podcast before. Because they’re such a great company. So they make grain free tortillas and tortilla chips and great products. So they work and live in Austin. So they invited me and a handful of other bloggers, including Lexi from Lexi’s Clean Kitchen, Vanessa from Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind. I went on book tour with her. And then Cassy from Fed and Fit. I actually wrote the exercise portion of her program, and her book. Her cookbook.

So all four of us, I think it’s just all four of us. They got a house for us, and we’re just doing like a blogger tour of Austin. We get to go out there and hang out with Siete Foods. Tour their facility and hang out. It’s just going to be so much fun. And those are four, or three of my favorite girls to hang out with. And we usually go to PaleoFx every year and get a house together. And that’s our time to actually hang out. Because we all live in different states. And that’s our one time to hang out and ask questions about how a person is making money. How they’re running their business and inspire each other. Lexi is always so helpful and inspiring. And in this business, you’re always learning and figuring out new things. So to be able to bounce ideas off of each other is just so cool.

So we usually do PaleoFx together, and this year none of us really wanted to go. It’s just a super expensive weekend. And we’re not a huge fan of the event itself. We went to Expo West this year, and that was so much fun. Vanessa, Cassy, and I, we went to Expo West in California. And we thought that was way cooler. Because they had a ton of gluten free and paleo products to choose from. But they also had natural, like body products. So they had a ton of stuff at Expo West. So it was a little bit better networking event. So we decided to not go to PaleoFx, which is a bummer, because it gets us into Austin and hanging out. So we’re so excited to go on this trip and hang out with each other, and just spend a few days with each other.

So we’re going Thursday through Sunday. And then I’m back for a week and a half. And then I leave for a 9-day, I think it’s 9-day trip to the Caribbean. So I’ve talked about this on the podcast before. But from Vanessa, Clean Eating with a Dirty Mind, one day she texted me and she was like, “Hey, would you want to fill in. We had some friends drop out of our yacht trip that we’re going on in the Caribbean in August.” And like, no questions asked. I was like, 2 spots booked. Here’s my money, take it. I want to go. And it was no questions asked. And I was like, I’ll figure out who can go with me later.

And of course, I invite my husband first. But he seriously works all the time. So he can’t go. He couldn’t take that much time off. He couldn’t leave early because we fly into St. Martin and then we leave from St. Martin. The yacht can’t take him back, because it’s an island-hopping trip, so we stay on the boat but we go to new islands every day. So the boat can’t just take him back and go off route.

So anyway, he can’t go. So I asked my best friend Laura. And she just went to Iceland, and she has some other stuff coming up, so she couldn’t go. So then my second person I was ready to ask was my sister-in-law. Because my sister-in-law loves the beach, and she loves drinking. So this trip is perfect for her. She’s really good at partying. And I’m not good at that, but I am good at being on the beach.

So, yeah. We’re going to a 9-day trip to the Caribbean. And then I have a trip to Boise, Idaho. And then I have a trip to Lake Powell. And I think San Antonio. And I don’t know from there. F*ck. It’s crazy. There are so many trips coming up. And I just feel so bad to leave my dog so many times. But he’ll be ok. It will all be ok.

So yeah. It’s pretty fun to get to go on all these trips. I still get the question, all the time, of “When are you guys going to have kids?” And it’s hard to answer when I get to go on trips like this on a regular basis and not have to think twice about it. And I can say yes to a Caribbean trip on a yacht with one of my best friends. How do you say no to that? I feel so lucky. And whenever people ask about having kids, I should be like, “Nope, sorry, I’m traveling. Can’t get pregnant.”

Speaking of pregnancy, I really need to figure out my birth control. Ugh. A girlfriend at the gym who used to work with OB/GYNs, she just keeps reminding me that I’m going to be pregnant if I don’t figure out my birth control soon. We’re being safe. Believe me, we’re not stupid. But, I need to figure that sh*t out.

And this is what sucks. When I talk about birth control on this podcast, I get so many opinions. And someone will be like, “Oh, Mirena was the best thing ever for me. It was so great!” And someone else will be like, “It was the worst experience of my life.” And then it’s the same thing with whatever that one is that goes in your arm, or a copper IUD. Or whatever. It’s like, (Jackson, f*ck dude!) It’s like, so many people have all these different opinions and experiences. So then you listen to all of them, because you’re like, well I don’t want to go through a miserable experience. So you listen to someone else. I just really need to get into a doctor. It’s just like, when the f*ck do I have time?

Oh my god, I don’t know if you just heard that, but that was Jackson burping. F*cking gross man.

So, anyways. Since I have all this travel coming up, I still need to figure out my international plan. I think I’m just going to use my phone as a hotspot. But a lot of these islands, I heard that you swim into just on a raft. Like on a float. So it’s not exactly safe to bring my computer. So what I’m trying to do right now is get all my posts ready. So all my recipes done, and written up, and so my email assistant can just log in and post my blog post every single day. So you have new recipes coming to the blog every single week. And then I have required posts that I work with companies. So that’s the scary part, making sure I get those done and up to date. Because what if internet doesn’t work that day? What if my hotspot isn’t working? What if there’s no service? I’m just kind of nervous for that.

And my assistant, who is one of my close friends. She’s like, “Ok, you need to actually have a real vacation.” Because whenever I go on trips, they’re never real vacations because I’m either; my business is my business. So, if I don’t post, I don’t make money for my family. I can’t just not post. That’s just not an option. So I make sure these posts are ready to go. But especially when I’m posting for a business for another company, there are just more details involved. And I obviously don’t want to f*ck up a relationship with any of the companies that I work with. So I’m kind of nervous about that. And I still want to have a vacation. I just want to make sure I get all my work done in a timely manner. So I’m trying to get all of that done quick enough. But I keep going on all these trips. So I’m just nervous right now. I have a bit of anxiety going on about getting everything done, and all the recipes done. But it will work. It will happen. Everything will come to fruition. I think that’s one of my favorite words. I feel like I say that word all the time.

So yeah, that’s what’s going on over here. A ton of travel and it’s been so much fun. And if you ever get the chance to visit Santa Ynez valley, you have to. And you have to stay at the Fess Parker Inn. Because it is f*cking sick. It is so awesome. And the restaurant is so, so bomb. And then take a horseback tour of the entire ranch. It was so fun. I just loved it so much! And I hadn’t been on a horse in, I don’t know, 18 years. Some crazy sh*t like that. That’s really scary to me. Oh my god, I’m seriously almost 30. I’m not a scared of the numbers person. But I’m more so scared about not planning my birthday in time. And I need to plan it. Ok, my birthday is not until April, and it’s July. But you know, you’ve got to plan ahead. I still have to decide where I want to go. I’m hopped up on coffee if you can’t tell. I haven’t eaten today, and I’ve only had coffee. Because it’s 8 in the morning. But I think I might do Hawaii. Hawaii is just a straight away. I think they have direct flights from Denver, which is pretty badass. I feel like I want to go places you can go direct.

3. Favorites for beauty [25:12]

Anyways. That’s what’s going on over here. So, today is going to be a quicker podcast. Because I’m just going to talk about some of my favorite things going on that I’ve been loving lately. Other than my adorable puppy, who is putting my butt right near me so I can scratch his butt. He’s just so dang cute, oh my god I love him.

So I was going to talk about my favorite things. I haven’t done a podcast like this in a hot minute, I don’t think. So whenever I do my favorite things, it’s like beauty products. It’s just stuff, anything that I’m loving. It could be anything that I’m loving lately. So let me pull up that list.

Oh, ok. So one of the things I’m loving lately is TULA products. So talked about TULA on the blog, and I actually still have a discount on my blog. I think the discount goes until September. So I have discount for a good chunk of time. And I forget what it is. It’s like 10 or 20% off your order, maybe. I forget. Anyways. I’ll link it in my blog post. So TULA are probiotic products, facial products. So I use their cleanser on the face. Some of my favorite products are their eye serum. So I love, dammit. I have coffee running through my blood.

I love the eye serum. I use their illuminating serum, and that’s my favorite product of all of them. Their illuminating serum, their deep wrinkle cream. I love their night, I forget what it’s called. It’s like a night conditioning thick cream. It makes your skin feel so soft in the morning. I’m feeling my face right now. So I love that product. It makes your skin feel so soft. And it’s like it’s protecting it overnight, because it stays thick on your face overnight. Your face doesn’t wake up dry. So I’ve been loving their products. I’ve been using them daily. But I’m using them on top of my other products that I’ve talked about.

So I’ll get a lot of questions, like, “So are you not using your Vivant products anymore?” And I totally still am. I use all kinds of different Vivant products, like their mandelic acid face cleanser, their mandelic acid serum. Their vitamin A. I use a Beyond complexion vitamin C. So I use a sh*t-ton of products on my face every single day. And I have loved adding TULA to my routine. So I’ve really loved it.

I did a whole blog post about it, which includes a discount in there. So you can just go to the blog, and if you go under the beauty tab, it has all my favorite products there in case you forget any of these and you’re trying to go back by 15 seconds and it’s annoying. So just go to and it has all my favorites there.

So one time when I was, a couple of episodes ago I was interviewing Liz Wolfe. And she was talking about one of her favorite products is CoQ10. So, she sent me this CoQ10 product to try. And I haven’t used it long enough to know, but I’m still loving it. And adding it to my; I forget why it’s even good for your skin. I don’t care, really, sometimes. Because there’s just too much knowledge out there. That was a really dumb statement.

So anyways, I’ve added CoQ10 to my skincare routine. I actually want to go look at the exact brand, just because. You should see my room right now, it’s just a sh*t-show mess after unpacking. But, let’s see. So HIQ. It’s called HIQ facial serum, and it’s a CoQ10. So she sent me a bunch of samples, a handful of samples to try. And I’ve been really loving adding that.

And then I’ve talked about this in previous posts. But my favorite face mask is the, I want to make sure I say it right. Andalou naturals. The instant brighten and tighten hydroserum facial mask. This has vitamin C in it, and it just brightens up your skin a ton. And I already use vitamin C, but it’s nice to get a little extra punch sometimes. So those are kind of the facial products that I’ve been loving lately. They’re just so great. They’re so great. All of them.

4. Favorites for food [30:04]

Ok, let’s see what else I have on my list. Oh, ok the next one I have is food related. So I am obsessed with this brand, Fourth & Heart. And they have ghee. If you don’t know what ghee is, it’s clarified butter. So they cook butter down, and then they remove the milk solids at the top. You can skim them off. You can make ghee yourself at home, you don’t need to buy it. But you can make it yourself. I just don’t personally want to take the time to do that. But you can skim the milk solids off the top after it boils down, and then you have this ghee. This clarified butter.

But Fourth & Heart, they just make ghee unlike anybody else’s ghee. It’s really creamy. Almost like if you sit butter on the counter, and you can slice into it. It’s just like butter, you know. So that’s what it’s like. It’s just so creamy. I’ve never been like a lick the spoon if I have butter or ghee on it type of person. And I see many people do that. My mother has been like that for years. I always thought that was so disgusting. But their ghee is that good that you can just lick the spoon after you’re trying to dump it in a pan or whatever. It’s so good.

I really like the Himalayan sea salt one. That’s the one I like to use for cooking, but they have a ton of different flavors. They have a vanilla bean, they have a truffle. They have a ton of different flavors. That is so good. Obsessed with them. And they are so nice. They reached out to me after I posted; I found them at whole foods and I posted about them, and they reached out to me and sent me a box full of other ones to try. Since I didn’t even see all the different ones they have on the shelf. Because I’m sure Whole Foods decides which ones go on the shelf, even. And every Whole Foods is different.

How crazy is it that Amazon bought Whole Foods? That’s bananas.

But this Fourth & Heart ghee is so freaking good. You can find it at Whole Foods, and I’m sure you can find it at other places. People all the time, whenever I post a product, they’re like, “Where can I find that?” I’m like, go on their website and look up store locator. Yeah, duh. I don’t know where you find it in Canada. I don’t know where you find it in Indiana. Look it up near you. You can find it. There’s always a store locator on a website. Duh. Come on. It’s the 21st century, bro!

So that ghee is seriously one of my favorites. Obsessed with it. They’re so cool.

Another company that I’m loving is Forest Coffee. It’s a cold-brew coffee. I find it at Whole Foods. And it’s in the cold section, like by the Almond Milks and other cold-brew coffees. And what I like about their cold brew is it already mixed with water. It’s super smooth, it’s not bitter. And it doesn’t destroy my gut, like a lot of cold-brew coffee does. Because I don’t water it down enough, because I love crazy strong coffee. But then my stomach is in knots. So this cold-brew coffee is already watered down. It’s so smooth. And I’ve been drinking that, that’s what I’m buying every week at this point. Two bottles a week, because my husband has some too.

And I’ve been adding it; this is another one of my favorites. My vanilla sweat cream cold-brew collagen coffee. Like, what a stupid long name. I’m so annoyed with myself. But I’ve been adding that Forest Coffee to that collagen coffee that I make every morning that I’m home. And I love this recipe. I love it so much. And my friends; I shouldn’t call my friends, because we’re more acquaintances. But I just think of them as my friends. But my friends at Just Be Kitchen, they tried it and made it themselves. That’s a paleo restaurant here in Denver. They made it, and then they put it on their menu. So cool. Anyway, I like having that as my coffee every morning. It’s so weird whenever you’re traveling and you can’t have your regular coffee routine. And I brought collagen packs with me, and I brought a little, what’s it called? Like a little handheld frother. And then I would blend the collagen into my hot coffee. But it’s just not the same as iced collagen sweet cream cold brew coffee. It’s just not the same, ok? But it did the trick, and I still got my collagen every day while I was traveling.

So that’s another favorite. Are these packs. So I like these little single packs that you can bring with you while traveling. And collagen is powder form. You can totally just dump it into a bag and bring the scoop with you and just add coffee every day. But it’s so nice to have individual packs so you don’t have to worry about bags opening and going all over everything and you have powder everywhere. So I’ve been loving these little single packs of collagen while I’m traveling, since I’m traveling so much these next few months. To make sure I’m still getting my collagen. I’m still growing that hair.

And yes, I get emails all the time from people asking, “Does collagen actually work or is this just a phase? Is this just a trend, or whatever?” And for me, collagen really has worked. My nails grow crazy fast, which is really annoying because I have to get them done more often. And then same thing with my hair. My hair is growing way faster than usual, which blows because I already get my hair dyed every 3 weeks. Because I’m naturally blonde. And if you’ve seen any pictures, my hair is brown. So I dye my hair brown every 3 weeks. I have a hair appointment next week, and my roots are already showing. I have a root spray, to cover up my blonde roots, and they’re already showing. So that’s what sucks. But it’s really awesome at the same time. Because of course, I want longer hair. Because why not?

You know what else sucks? My hair stylist went on maternity leave. And I really want her back in my life. As well as my cleaning lady. I feel like I sound so pretentious when I say that. But this cleaning lady has made my life so much better when I work from home and destroy my home every single day with taking food photos and making food and doing dish. And it’s like just a sh*t show. She just had twins. So everybody is on maternity leave. And I’m just over here trying not to get pregnant, and figure out birth control.

5. Traveling solo [36:57]

So yeah. That’s what I’m loving. Also, I am loving traveling solo. I love traveling with my husband. We do really, really well together traveling. It’s never like a very stressful situation. Because he is so f*cking chill, and whenever I start to freak out he really calms me down. He’s just easy to hang out with all the time. But I still love traveling by myself. I think it goes back to me being an only child and doing a lot of things by myself growing up. So it’s so nice traveling solo and talking to new people. I had a schedule, but I didn’t have a tighter schedule to keep with someone else. So things could kind of move around and I could do whatever I wanted to do. (Why are you shoving your face onto my leg?) This dog. He just doesn’t want to leave his mom’s side, because I left him for a week. (Do you? Can I have a kiss? Oh boy, he just gave me a kiss.)

So I’ve been loving traveling solo. And I’ll probably have more trips in the future traveling solo, so that will be cool. Just to do some of those. The only thing is I hate experiencing stuff without my husband, and telling him these cool experiences and him not being a part of it. So it’s definitely a fine balance of still loving and having fun in our marriage while still getting to do things separate. So traveling solo is just so fun. And I think it’s really empowering. Because I remember being younger, and {laughs} I wonder if you can hear Jackson trying to give me a kiss in this recording. He’s so cute.

I remember being younger and being really, really insecure. I never wanted to get to a restaurant before all my friends. I never wanted to go anywhere, have coffee by myself. I was very insecure about being alone. And I’ve always been an only child who has been alone a ton. But just in social settings, it felt like people were judging me. Like, “Why is this girl having dinner by herself.” And now to be able to do that I think it is so empowering. I had multiple dinners by myself, breakfast by myself, going to coffee by myself. Walking around the town by myself. There were a ton of things that I did by myself, and it’s so empowering to be able to walk in somewhere, sit down. I would dress up to go to dinner, be all dressed up, and have cocktail and dinner all by yourself and be totally comfortable with that. And be comfortable in silence. It was awesome.

So I think it’s so empowering, especially as a woman, to be able to do that. And highly recommend to push yourself, if you’re a person who is not comfortable with that sort of setting to push yourself to be able to do that. I think it’s so cool. So it was so much fun to travel solo, and I think I have a couple more trips coming up by myself. But hopefully I can pull my husband out of work so he can hang out. It’s crazy. His work has just gotten busier and busier over the years, and just continues to. So this is his one day off, which is why I shouldn’t be recording a podcast in our bedroom while he has his one day off from work.

But we have a backyard that we’re still waiting on finishing touches of our furniture. We ordered a couch for a corner of our backyard. So now we’re just waiting on this furniture to have our backyard settled, so we love hanging out there. But I came home to a new table and chairs that he had put together. And now we have a table and chairs in our backyard. So that’s so exciting. Stupid adult stuff it’s so exciting.

6. Favorites for fashion [40:48]

Ok. Last but not least, one other thing that I’m totally loving right now is Made Well. So if you don’t know what that is, it’s just a clothing company. They have stores. They’re also available in Nordstrom. They just have the cutest clothes. I wore this really adorable skirt when I was in Santa Ynez Valley to dinner, and they just have really nice quality, pretty clothes. They’re just very pretty, and I’ve been loving their stuff lately. It’s very simple. And reasonably priced. Sometimes they have items that are more expensive than usual, but pretty reasonably priced. The under $100 mark is pretty constant there. I think their jeans are $80 and they’re supposed to be really comfortable. I’ve actually never tried on jeans, because I just started wearing their clothes more often in the summer. But I heard their jeans are awesome, so I’ve loved their clothes lately.

And, that brings my favorite things right now. Which sucks whenever you listen to this, say you’re listening to this 4 months from now. But the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale. So, while I was on this trip, the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale went live. Which, I was bummed because I was invited to go to a Nordstrom store early to shop the sale early. But of course, I was not in Colorado. So I woke up. I set my alarm. I went to bed at 10, in the hotel that I was at. And then I set my alarm for midnight, because the sale started at midnight, pacific time. So I set my alarm for midnight. And then I went through all the times, I purchased my favorites from the sale. And then I linked all the items, the favorites, from the sale on my blog.

So this took about 3 hours, because the internet was super slow at that time, for some reason. So I kept falling asleep while I was doing this post. As I’m trying to order stuff and link stuff at the same time. I kept falling asleep. But I got that post up of all my favorites from the sale. So you can find that on the blog. But the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale is by far my favorite sale of the year. I think it’s better than Black Friday. I think it’s better than Cyber Monday. I think it’s just the best sale. They just have the cutest stuff on major sale. And it opens. If you’re a card holder, they have early access sale for cardholders. And so for two weeks, you can shop the sale. I think it’s two weeks, you can shop the sale early. And then it opens to the public. So if you’re a card holder, you just have more of the sale before it all sells out. And a lot of stuff sells out pretty quickly.

So that sale was awesome. And actually, the site crashed the first day it went live. Because of course, a ton of bloggers talk about it and a lot of people just know about it. So they started crashing in the daytime. And since it crashed for a couple of hours, Nordstrom was nice enough to do; instead of, I think they give you a point per dollar you spend. And the more points you get, the more money back you get. And the higher tier you can get, so you can shop the sale even earlier. The higher tier you are as a card holder. So since the site crashed, Nordstrom made it instead of 1 point per dollar, you made 10 points per dollar for 2 days. So I actually went shopping once more for any other items, just because it was 10 points per dollar day, which is pretty awesome compared to one, or whatever you make.

So the sale is just awesome. And it goes until August 7th. So if you’re listening to this later on, and it’s still in that time frame, go to the sale. It is such a good deal, and it’s my favorite sale of the year. So yeah. Those are my favorites right now. Those are Ju-Ju’s favorites. Talking about myself in the third person.

7. The Bachelorette [45:22]

I forgot to talk about the Bachelorette. I just watched it yesterday, because I was out of town and missed it. And I half watched it, because I was working at the same time I was watching it. And I listen to a podcast about it before. And get this; I listen to the Reality Steve podcast. Which he usually doesn’t talk about who wins. And he did. It was a major spoiler. I tried to skip; didn’t skip in time. So I know who wins at this point. I’m not going to say how I feel about it. Because that will give it away. So I know who wins. But this episode, it’s just so weird. All these guys; like, Peter is saying how he was in love with a girl and then he left her. She doesn’t ask him why, and he’s crying about it. It’s like, you’re crying about a relationship while you’re on a date with another person. That’s not a good sign, man.

And then Bryan, chiropractor, implants in his cheeks guy. He talks about how he was a really bad kid and how he had to go to an all-boys catholic school. And she doesn’t question that? Maybe you should ask about that. Maybe you should dig into that a little bit more, Rachel. That’s pretty much all I got from it. But next will be good, and I’ll have to do a recap of that.

But now I need to go walk my dog. I need to actually hang out with my husband. I need to spend some time with the people I love, since I’m going to be gone so much. So thanks for tuning in. So sorry this podcast was late this week, but thanks for listening. And yeah. I’ll just try to keep up on these podcasts as much as I can while I’m on these trips. I’ll have to just do some voice memos in my hotel room. That will just be my go-to, I guess. (Give me a kiss, dog!)

Maybe I’ll record one from sea. And do that. I might do that. That might be cool. Right? Ooh, that’s a good idea. Ok I will talk to you soon. Thanks for tuning in. Don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe. And only leave nice reviews. Because mean people have heart attacks. Isn’t that stress related? Heart attacks. I don’t know. I don’t care. Be nice to people. That’s all I’ve got to say. Keep being awesome. Thanks for listening. I’ll talk to you soon. Bye-bye for now.

Chatting about my recent trip to Santa Ynez Valley (which I’ll be recapping on the blog soon) and some of my favorite things that I seem to be using daily in my own life! Tula Products HiQ CoQ10 Andalou Face […] Chatting about my recent trip to Santa Ynez Valley (which I’ll be recapping on the blog soon) and some of my favorite things that I seem to be using daily in my own life! Tula Products HiQ CoQ10 Andalou Face […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 47:39
Creating a Better Relationship w/ Food – Episode 42: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 08 Jul 2017 20:23:42 +0000 28 It took me a long time to create a healthy and happy relationship with food, so I thought I would share my experience and what has worked for me over the years! ____________ Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe […] It took me a long time to create a healthy and happy relationship with food, so I thought I would share my experience and what has worked for me over the years!


Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 42 Transcription!

1. Birth control update [16:02]
2. A better relationship with food [20:89]
3. Foods you should probably avoid [34:33]
4. Think about what’s going on in your life [40:19]
5. Comparison is the thief of joy [47:19]

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: Well hello there you beautiful soul. Welcome to the 40-something episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. I think it’s the 42nd. I think. But how am I supposed to remember these things? Oh yeah, look it up before? No. B*tch ain’t got time for that. I’m over here on a Saturday, when I post my podcast. Recording on a Saturday, because I have a lot of sh*t going on lately. I’m about to leave for the next 20 days out of 30 days. I’m going to be out of town. So I’m not at home much. Which means I need to get all my recipes done ahead of time, and all my other blog posts done. So when I leave on this vacation, that is away from technology, my assistant can just take over and finish that.

But, ok. I’m just getting ahead of myself at this point. I want to talk about this past week. Ok? Because it was July 4th. It was a holiday on a Tuesday. What a terrible invention. Why can’t they change it to Independence Week? Just have a full week. Because a lot of people take that full vacation anyways. Why not? Tuesday was awkward as f*ck. It felt weird all week. But, July 4th was awesome, itself. So we went to Horse Tooth Reservoir, which is in Fort Collins, which is like an hour and a half away from Denver. We took a boat up there, and we just wake surfed, and a couple of people wake boarded. But I’ve never been to Horse Tooth. And I had no idea it’s so big. Because whenever we go to lakes, we go to these private, really small, manmade lakes. And they’re a figure 8. You’re just letting go of the rope to wake surf, and then you have to grab it because you have to turn around.

So, to be on a lake that is 7 miles long, was pretty f*cking neat. It’s pretty neat. So we wake surfed, and we hung outside. And a bunch of our friends came up and jumped in the boat with us. And it was just so much fun. And it was just so, like my husband grew up on lakes. And literally where I feel in love with my husband was on a lake, because this guy who is super quiet and kept to himself and really shy when we first started dating, completely came out of his shell and he could not stop smiling when I went to the lake with him the first time. I was like, oh! This guy’s way cooler than I thought he was.

So, he loves being on a lake, and I’ve always been a person who was really worried to get on the lake. Because I’m feeling insecure about myself being in a swimsuit. And that was a fear I had to get over. So once I got over that fear, and I actually found something on the lake that I wanted to do and wanted to get better at, which is wake surfing, I feel like it made our relationship even better. We have this common thing together, we are opposite people. We have completely different interests. So to have something that we both like to do together is really cool.

So anyway, we went wake surfing. Our friends came out. And then, we headed back home and we pretty much went straight to the Rockies game. And they’re the baseball team, if you don’t follow sports. I’m surprised I even know who the Rockies are, honestly. But we went to a Rockies game. And this Rockies game, nobody goes to the Rockies game really because they pretty much always suck. And you know, there are like 4 million baseball games per season. So you can pick whenever you want to go. So they’re not crazy busy most of the time, which is really nice whenever we go, because I’ll go with my husband. Ok, Jackson. Calm your tits. The mailman just came. I apologize if your eardrums are broken.

So anyways. I go to games with him just because I don’t mind going to baseball games. I don’t watch baseball, I don’t mind kind of watching baseball. Because I found a place that serves potatoes. Like, you can get nachos, but on a baked potato. You can get pulled pork and all the fixings for nachos, but on a baked potato. So I know where I can go eat. Our friends usually have tickets through work, so we get good seats. So it’s a decent fun time. It’s not football to me. And if you don’t know what I mean by that; I f*cking hate football. Don’t be like, “How do you hate football?” I hate football. How do you like football? That’s the real question.

But anyways. We went to the Rockies game. And most games aren’t very busy. But this game, two nights in a row for July 4th, they have a fireworks show at the end. And part of the seats can go down on the field and sit on the field. And I don’t give a sh*t about fireworks. Probably because I’m a girl, and I don’t care about fire and like explosions. I don’t know. Maybe you’re a girl and you like that kind of sh*t. But I don’t. So, I don’t care about that. But my husband was like a little kid. He could not wait for this fireworks show. So I went, and got through game. And I say, got through the game. We got there in like the 6th inning. So got through the game, I really pressed through it. And then, they have to get all these seats on the field, which takes like an hour. It takes forever, and so to entertain the crowd, and to keep them there and entertained, they’re throwing free T-shirts.

And, ok. So, crowds give me a lot of anxiety, especially sports crowds. I think people in sports are just absolutely obnoxious. You’re screaming and yelling cusswords at either a player or the opposite team. In any other social situation, that’s not ok. But since you’re at a game, it’s cool to be really f*cking mean to someone. I don’t know. I just f*cking hate crowds. So when they start throwing T-shirts, people will literally jump across other humans to get this sh*tty ass T-shirt. So that’s what they’re doing. And this older woman, she’s probably in her 40s. I didn’t look at her because I was very unhappy with her. But she kept lunging over me, and elbowing me in the head. I’m like, what do you need this ugly-ass purple Rockies T-shirt for? You obviously probably paid to come to this game. You can afford to buy your own f*cking T-shirt. So why are you trying to get this sh*tty one? And you’re going to f*cking throw elbows to get it? Are you f*cking crazy?

So, anxiety level up after that happened. And then, I’m really trying to work on my anxiety, because it holds me back in doing things that I know are fun long-term, that my husband is really happy with. And I don’t want that anxiety to get in the way of our relationship. So the whole time during this game, I am thinking how are we going to get a ride home. Because we got an Uber there just in case we drank. And because parking is a sh*t show. Because the stadium is downtown. So, can you hear Jackson sneezing?

So the whole time I’m just thinking about how we’re going to get home. And my husband thinks that’s very dumb. He’s like, why are you worrying so much? We’re going to get an Uber, it’s going to be fine. And we live probably 7 miles, maybe 8, from the stadium. And our Uber home cost us $55. No. F*cking so dumb.

But, the end of this story is, the fireworks were really f*cking awesome. It was worth it. Do I want to go back again? Probably not. Maybe go to a bar that you can see the stadium. But it was just a lot of people. A long day in the sun. I was so tired the next day because we probably didn’t get home until midnight after the show. And just being in the sun all day, and then dealing with anxiety all night. I was so f*cking tired the rest of the week. And I still feel tired. Stupid sh*t to complain about, but isn’t that me. So that’s kind of what has been going on this week. Dealing with a holiday, and then trying to get all my recipes done beforehand. And all my blog posts done.

So I’m going on this trip through the Caribbean. I think it’s the Caribbean. We fly into St. Martin, and then we get onto a yacht. I got invited on this trip because some friends backed out, so thank you, whoever those people backed out of this trip. So, we go on a yacht, and sail to different islands every day. It’s like a 9-day trip. So it’s a good chunk of time, so I want to make sure I still have all my posts and podcast done. Hopefully I can get all the podcasts done. But all the posts done ahead of time so I can really just let my assistant take over, and I can get an actual real vacation, because I haven’t been probably ever on a real vacation when I’ve been doing my blog. Because if you run your own business you know you have to continue to work, even when you’re gone. So I’m trying to get everything done. Do you want your bone? Everything done ahead so I can party it up.

And I also have this trip, I leave in 2 days, to California to Santa Ynez. Still don’t know how to pronounce it, honestly. Santa Ynez, which is wine country outside of Santa Barbara. And then I have a trip to Austin, too. So I have these two other trips before this trip to the Caribbean. So I’m just trying to get a lot of sh*t done. So you guys aren’t like, what the f*ck? On my website. And hopefully you do look at my website. If you’re like, “I don’t know what your website is, b*tch.” That’s fine. But will you go look at it? Because I really put a lot of time into those recipes for you. Darling.

Oh. I have to tell you what else. Sorry there was squeaking; letting the dog out. Something else that happened that I’m very pumped about is we finally. We’ve lived in our house for 2 years, and we finally are getting to a point that we like our house. We have a 1950s house, and we painted it just recently. And then we finally saved up enough money to get the landscaping done. Because if you’ve ever done landscaping, it’s f*cking expensive. I don’t understand it. It sucks. But man. I don’t want to do it myself, that’s for sure. So saved up enough money so we could get some landscaping done. Kind of get the bare minimum and just make it look nice so that we enjoy our backyard and we love to look at it. And so the landscaping just finished yesterday. And then we need to order furniture, so we can hang out in the backyard and sit there and get eaten by mosquitos. So that’s what’s been going on. All that fun stuff. All that adulting, boring ass, fun stuff.

And all while this is happening, my amazing friend, who is one of the kindest people I’ve ever met, and would do anything for anyone, is going through a sh*tty breakup. And I can’t talk much about it, because it’s f*cking rude. But this guy is the master manipulator. F*cking just manipulating the sh*t out of things. And he’s a bad person. And he acts like he’s this great person. And I say this because I have been in a relationship in the past where I was manipulated hard core. And so I kind of see it more, now, than I did previously because I thought I was very naïve and thought people were just good people. This was before the time of Instagram and Facebook and awful people coming out everywhere. But I just thought people were nice, you know? I didn’t think people were bad people.

Well, I figured out that’s not true. So I’ve been manipulated in a relationship. And this guy is doing the exact same thing. And he is sketch as f*ck. And I’m just watching her go through this, and the pain she is feeling, and it’s so f*cking sad. It’s so sh*tty when people have to go through this and there’s nothing you can do. There’s nothing you can do to help their pain through it. And all I want to do, because I have his number, is just text him, and say, “I curse the day you were born.” And if you don’t know what that line is from, well you need to watch more Sex in the City, obviously. The movie. But I curse the day he was born. Because he sucks. And you’re just not supposed to be mean to people. People that you say you love.

So I curse the day he was born, and I hope he poops his pants someday. That’s all I have to say about that. That’s just what’s been going on over here. And I feel like I’ve been not hanging out on social media much because I’m just trying to hang out with her, and hopefully ease her pain that she’s going through. I just want him to poop his pants. So anyways. Another thing that’s been going on. I know you do not care about any of this. But you know, that’s what happens, ok.

So, my hairstylist just went on maternity leave. So she had to pass me off to someone else at the salon. I just got my hair done by her yesterday. And I do not like it. It’s fine. But I don’t like it. And my cleaning lady just went on maternity leave. Why does everybody have to have babies and go on maternity leave? I get it. Everybody needs maternity leave. I’m not dissing maternity leave. It’s just, why does everybody have to have babies? Just don’t have babies so we can just hang out and do our hair and help me be clean because I destroy my kitchen every 46 seconds. Baby problems, man. They get in the way. They really, really do.

1. Birth control update [16:02]

Oh, speaking of babies. I’ve been getting a couple of questions of this, just because I touched on this on my podcast before. And people have been asking questions about it. So, I got off birth control a few months ago. Don’t worry, I’m not trying to have babies, obviously. I got off birth control. Long story short, sh*t happened with our insurance so we got kicked off our insurance, and it just at the same time I was supposed to renew my birth control or whatever. Get new pack. And so I was out of birth control, and I was like, well I’ve wanted to clear my system of this pill birth control for a long time. So I’m going to get it out of my system and decide what I want to do. And people are like, “How are you not getting pregnant?” Well I’m not f*cking dumb. I’ve gone 30 years without getting pregnant. Well, I guess I wasn’t haven’t sex for a good chunk of that time. But still. I’ve gone a long time without getting pregnant. I know how to not get pregnant. So that’s how we’re not getting pregnant. And I still am trying to decide.

Oh; I was going to talk about symptoms. Coming off the birth control I was very emotional for that first month. And that was about it. I had a little worse cramps than I usually do. Nothing really else changed. Everything else was about the same. I went back to normal cycle. I’m just a little bit; I feel like I’m just a little bit bitchier when it’s that time of the month. But that eases pretty quickly, but I definitely have some b*tch to me. But I think I always just have some b*tch to me. I mean, I deal with people on the internet all day every day. It comes with the territory, and it’s pretty easy to become a pessimist.

So, no big changes. And now I’m just trying to find a new doctor. We got new health insurance, and I’m trying to find a new doctor. But not really trying, because I haven’t really looked at all. And I just hate dealing with insurance and having to find a doctor that takes your insurance. I just don’t care enough. I live a very healthy lifestyle. I haven’t had any issues yet, knock on wood, so I have just been putting it off. Now I have travel coming up.

But a bunch of people have recommended Mirena, the IUD. And I think it’s progesterone. I forget. But it’s something that Liz Wolfe recently said is better for you. {laughs} So I was thinking about looking into that one, because I wanted to do the copper IUD, which is no hormones, just copper. And I haven’t heard anybody have a good experience on that. Like, absolutely miserable. So I thought about Mirena. And I don’t know much about it. But I just thought about it. I haven’t looked into it at all. But I thought about the whatever they give you that goes in your arm and releases birth control. It goes into your arm. {laughs} Good explanation. It goes right into, kind of by your biceps, and yeah. It just gives you birth control that way.

So I thought about that one. But still trying to figure it out. But I’m not really trying to figure it out. So maybe someday. But in the meantime, I’m just not being stupid, and not getting pregnant. Because I know how to do that. And I think that’s that. That’s all I have. That’s all I got. Breakups, birth control, bad hair, upcoming trips. That’s what’s going on.

And no bachelor this week, which I’m so annoyed with. Just because there was July 4th on a Tuesday, means you don’t have to have your show on a Monday? You’re being f*cking lazy, ABC. I know you gave us two episodes last week, but you’re being lazy. So I’m pissed about that. And I’m pretty sure I’m going to be in the Caribbean when the finale is going on. So I honestly might just look at Reality Steve and see who wins. Because what am I going to do? I just don’t know. It’s such a dilemma in my life. Such a dilemma!

2. A better relationship with food [20:89]

Ok. So, today I was like, what the hell am I going to talk about on my podcast? I really need to start bringing on a couple more guests, because I’m running out of things to talk about other than just myself. Because I’m such a f*cking only child, and I can just talk for billions of years. But today, I was thinking we talk about creating a better relationship with food. Because, in my day to day, and the people I deal with online, and the people I see at my gym, I know that most human beings, even when they’re in the fitness community and their eyes have been opened to what overall health is, a lot of people still have a negative relationship with food. And I had a really bad relationship with food for probably 25 years. And I’m 29 now. It took me a long time to get comfortable with the idea that food was actually good for you. And understanding that, and getting rid of the thought that I had to starve myself. Because that’s what I was taught my whole life. That’s what I saw everyone do. My peers, adults, TV. Everyone said that if you want to lose weight, you have to not eat. You have to be unhappy. You have to not eat carbs. These are the things I saw daily in reality TV shows.

I remember, even watching the Hills, and Lauren Conrad saying, “I haven’t eaten carbs in blah, blah, blah,” or something like that. And I’m like, oh. I shouldn’t be eating carbs. I just didn’t understand that there could be a healthy relationship with food. Nobody gave me the tools to see that and to understand that. So I wanted to talk about that and just talk about my own experience, and what ways I have created a healthy relationship with food. And why I always have to fight that. I have to fight for that relationship. I guess it’s like marriage. You’ve got to f*cking fight for it. Because it will push back. It will suck at some point. The bodies will change. You’ll give birth to a human, and your hormones will be f*cking crazy. And this good relationship you had before is altered. It’s just like marriage. Food is just like marriage. Take my word for it, guys.

So anyways. I have just come, I think, a really long way with food. And I want other people to experience that. So I just want to talk about kind of the key factors that have really helped me. So let’s do the backstory. Sorry if you’ve heard this podcast already; this topic already. If I’m just beating around the bush. I don’t know what it’s called. So I grew up with tons of eating disorders and just hating myself. I hated everything about myself. I remember thinking at one point, I was really trying to change my attitude about myself and how I viewed myself. And I was like, ok. You need to tell yourself three things you like about yourself. And I couldn’t even say three things I liked about myself. That’s how much I hated myself. I hated the way I looked. I just didn’t feel comfortable in my skin. And I didn’t know how to change that.

So I had this very negative relationship with food, because I loved food. I love food so much. Food is life to me. Food is everything. It’s relationships. Food is just everything to me. Obviously, I have a food blog. And I remember people telling me that was weird when I was like, what are we going to have for dinner? When we’re eating lunch. My friends would be like, why are you even talking about dinner? And I still get that now. But now I just don’t get offended. But I was like, god I am weird. Nobody is obsessed as me. Thank god the internet showed me that many people are as obsessed as I am.

So I grew up with a very negative relationship with food. I saw women in my life who had a very negative relationship with food and their body, and that kind of wore off on me a little bit, too. So I starved myself. I limited my calories. I tried to be bulimic, I just couldn’t do it. I binged. I just did all the crazy things that you do, that you might do, as a teenager. And I know a lot of teenagers who have done that kind of crazy stuff. So very bad relationship. Get to college, still a pretty negative relationship. And I started working out. But it was like, it was to punish myself. Working out was punishment. It was like, you don’t look good enough. You’re not good enough, so you have to workout. It wasn’t a positive relationship whatsoever.

So, I would punish myself in the gym doing things that I hated. Whatever, like Stairmaster for like 2 hours. And I just didn’t like being there that much, but I made myself do it. And I still ate really sh*tty. And I didn’t understand what real food was. I didn’t grow up on real food. I grew up on oatmeal cream pies, and peanut butter sandwiches with chocolate chips. I grew up on sh*tty food, probably because I was such a pain in the ass child, and wouldn’t eat anything. So my mom is just like, get some f*cking food in you.

So I grew up on sh*tty food most of the time. And I didn’t know how to eat once I was on my own. So, I started cooking recipes, just trying other people’s recipes. But it was like, back then, lasagna and pasta dishes. That’s kind of what you do in college. And this relationship of hating myself continued. And thinking that food was the enemy. So it was the vicious cycle of trying not to eat anything at all. And then I would eat everything because I was starving. It was just such a negative, negative relationship. I can’t believe I lived like that for so long, now looking back. And it wasn’t; I went through these stages through college. I found the Zone Diet, and after the Zone Diet I found the paleo diet.

So, Zone is kind of like Weight Watchers; they have points, Zone has blocks. So you’re kind of just getting your food in moderation. You’re getting portion control more than anything. And then paleo, that was like really, really scary to me. I was like, I could never do that. That’s so impossible. I could not cut out cheese, I could not cut out bread. What would I ever eat? The normal sh*t that people go through when they start paleo. Thinking that there’s nothing to eat. {laughs} It’s like, there’s everything to eat. It’s just you have to use your brain. Just not getting something out of the vending machine and opening up a box. You actually have to work for it.

So I found paleo. Started doing paleo. And I still; my body changed. I found CrossFit. My body changed even more. And I still had this negative relationship with food, because my body was getting pretty f*cked up from the hormones due to over exercising. And really f*cking up my hormones through that. So I was gaining weight, and that created even worse relationship with food. So I limited my carbs and I was like, I can’t have any carbs. I need to limit how much food I’m eating. If I’m still hungry, it’s just because I need to get my portion control under wraps. I was just doing this negative thing. And then I would binge. It was just this crazy vicious cycle that went on until I was probably 25.

It wasn’t until I was like, f*ck this. Whatever I’m doing isn’t working, obviously. I work out so hard and I’m eating healthy, so what is the f*cking deal? And it was that I was working out too much, and I wasn’t eating enough. And I actually needed to eat more. So one day, I was like f*ck this. I am just going to live a better life. I’m going to take rest days. I’m going to lift less. I’m going to put less strain on my body. I’m going to sleep more. I’m going to eat what my body is craving. I’m going to listen to my body. And I think a lot of people have a hard time with listening to what your body is wanting, versus craving. Because there’s the difference of craving sugar, because you’ve taught your body to want it. Just like drugs. Versus your body wants carbs because you had a really hard workout today. There’s a difference, and it’s hard to find that.

So what my f*ck it moment was, I was like, I’m not doing this anymore. I’m going to take care of my body. I’m going to listen to it. And I’m going to think of food how it was intended to be. Meaning, it’s intended to be fuel. You need food to live. You need food to thrive. You need food to be able to think. To stand upright. To function. To have any sort of relationship. You need food to have a life for yourself. And I thought of food as this negative thing. But when I was eating the food that my body needed, then I was able to see it as what food really is. And it’s fuel, and it’s energy.

So when I was able to change my viewpoint on what food is, instead of being this negative, “I’m going to gain weight. I hate myself.” Instead of seeing it like that, I finally saw it as fuel that I just worked really hard, and I need to fuel that body, so I can do everything. I can have energy to work long hours. I can have energy to keep pushing on with my work. I can have energy to go wake surf with my husband all day. I have energy to do stuff. And that’s what food became to me, as fuel and energy. And I had to change that viewpoint. And I’ve heard this, my friends Joy and Claire on Girls Gone WOD podcast. They talk about this before. You have to stop thinking as food as this transactional thing. And before it was like, “How many calories am I going to burn in the gym. So I can eat less calories than that so I can lose weight.” It was always this transactional thing. Until I just was like; no. Food is fuel. I need food to nourish my body correctly.

And that’s when I started eating more carbs. I probably started eating more food in general. And I stopped wasting energy and time thinking about how my body wasn’t good enough. I stopped putting that emphasis on stress and cortisol in my body with stressing out about it. And that was when my body started to change. And that was at about 25.

So stop thinking of food as the enemy. You have to stop thinking of it as that. Because it’s really not. If you are fueling it with the food that your body needs, and is correct for your body, it is not the enemy. So I think remembering that food is energy, and is fuel, and not thinking about it as the enemy is huge. That’s huge. Stop listening to the f*cking TV, when it comes on and it’s like, “Carb-free life” or “Limiting your calories.” All this stuff. Think of it as, food that you need to put in your body because you want to live the best life possible.

And these people who tell me at the gym all the time; all these people will have energy drinks. They’ll have like 5-hour energy. I’m like, why do you need that? They’re like, because I’m not sleeping and I’m super tired. It’s like, why are you not sleeping? There is a reason behind that. It’s not that your body just doesn’t sleep. Something is out of whack. And a lot of times, it starts with food. So if you can get the food first, so you’re actually fueling your body so it can get to a normal sleep rhythm, and it can be fueled throughout the day, then food is not the enemy. And you don’t have to turn to sh*tty energy drinks. I hate energy drinks. And believe me, I drank plenty of them in college. But as an adult, I’m so annoyed with people at the gym. I’m like, stop f*cking drinking Red Bull, ok? Just go watch the fun sports they do. That’s the only thing Red Bull should be doing. No offense to Red Bull; you guys have really cool outdoor sports games stuff.

3. Foods you should probably avoid [34:33]

Anyways. So now, we have food is fuel, and it shouldn’t be the enemy. I think it’s important to remember that if you are eating something like, whatever it is. Something that’s not the best food for you. Say you’re going to get fast food every day. Or on a regular basis. And it makes you feel bad; that is probably something you need to cut out. So if you’re eating food that’s not good for you, and you’re feeling sh*tty about it, and you know you shouldn’t be eating that. It creates this negative relationship. And it sabotages your daily and lifetime goals. Then stop eating it. Ok?

I say this because I, for so long, I have many sh*tty things that I ate in my life. But let’s go with pop. Let’s go with soda. I used to drink soda, pop, whatever you call it, all the time growing up. It was always in the house. I always bought it. I always got it when I went and ate out. And soda is so bad for you. And it is 100% not needed in your diet. It’s not needed. I don’t give a sh*t if it’s sugar free, because it is bad for you. Sugar free is bad for you. And you can do research on it. You can find out why sugar-free is bad for you. But you should not be eating sugar free, or regular sugar soda. And I was doing this for a long time. I drank pop for a long time. Even when I would get cocktails sometimes, I would still get pop in it. And I’m like, this doesn’t make me feel good. This isn’t good for me. So I’m not going to drink it anymore. I’m going to find other options, like getting soda water. Or sparkling water. And do that.

There’s this cool company out there now that’s called Spin Drift. And it doesn’t taste like soda, but it has fresh fruit crushed in it. So there’s like 1 gram of sugar, or something like that. But find other options. And I stopped drinking pop altogether. And I don’t ever drink pop. I think it’s gross. And I don’t think people should drink it.

And I’m the same way with fast food. I used to eat fast food constantly. And I know what it does to a body. And I know how bad it is for you. And I don’t want to have a negative relationship with food. So I stopped eating fast food. And even with gluten. Gluten is that one thing that I don’t want to ever eat. I don’t think it’s needed in the diet, and I don’t care about it, and I don’t want it in my body. So I cut that out. If there’s a wedding I go to, I always say wedding because it’s like the only time I really have cake and want to have cake. Like, regular gluten-filled cake. But I cut gluten out and then I’ll have a piece of cake, but I don’t have to feel negative about it because it’s not something I’m eating on a regular basis.

So I think it’s important to understand what food you should and shouldn’t be eating. And if a certain food makes you feel negative, then maybe that’s not the best food for you. And there’s that fine balance. Because I’ve talked myself into thinking that carbs were terrible when I really did need carbs. So I’m saying a food that’s not good for you. Maybe you shouldn’t be eating that.

And that kind of ties into alcohol. And I talk about alcohol a lot. I share cocktails on my blog on a regular basis, and I talk about that usually in the cocktail post. If your goal is to lose weight, and to live a healthier lifestyle, then you need to get rid of alcohol. If you want to gain muscle. If you want to see a change in your physique, you have to get rid of alcohol. And nobody wants to hear that. And nobody wants to believe that. But it is the honest truth. And a lot of times, people drink because it’s a social thing. But if alcohol is making you depressed, because it is a depressant, and your making bad food decisions when you’re drunk. Which is what I did, and have done in the past. Then maybe alcohol is something you shouldn’t have in your diet on a regular basis. Because it’s just not something that you process well.

My husband likes to drink. My sister-in-law likes to drink. Like last night, we were all 3 hanging out together. And they both have a drink. What do I do? I get a Hail Mary’s little chocolate cup. That is my alcohol. That’s my treat, is getting a little dessert versus a drink. Because a drink doesn’t make me feel good. And having this little paleo dessert does make me feel good. It makes my mind feel good. It makes my body feel good. I’m not littering it with weird sh*t. And alcohol doesn’t make me feel the same. So, I remind people with alcohol, because we forget about alcohol a lot. And the relationship it can cause with food. And the decisions that we make when we do drink alcohol. Not everybody does that, but I know a lot of people make bad decisions with food if they’re drinking alcohol. So that’s kind of something to look into. If you are making decisions and you are feeling a negative relationship with food, or you’re feeling bad the next day, then maybe alcohol is not the best choice for you. Just an idea.

4. Think about what’s going on in your life [40:19]

This is a huge one. This is going psychologist on people. I do not have a degree in any of this. Well, health and exercise science, so kind of. But, for me, I wasn’t able to have a healthy relationship with food until I was able to see what behaviors and what things in my life were causing this negative relationship with food. A lot of times, people have issues with food because they are unhappy in a part of their life. Maybe you have lost a friend, a family member. Maybe you’re going through a divorce. Maybe there’s something that is traumatic in your life at that point, and is causing you to maybe turn to food in a negative way.

Think about it. How many movies have you seen where a person goes through a breakup, and their friend gets them ice cream? We give them food. Even when my friend was going through this breakup, I was like, maybe I should get her ice cream. That’s what I thought about right away. I’m like, that is not what we need to turn to, is food. Because there’s a negative point in our lives we turn to food to really change that behavior, and change that upset that’s happening in our life. And I did that for a long time. I just turned to food. I was unhappy in my own life, and I ate food to get those endorphins back up. And as soon as the food would end, those endorphins would go away, and so I’d want it again. So I would eat more. And eat more. And those behaviors are coming from somewhere deep inside. You have to figure that out.

Maybe you’re in a bad relationship. I speak that from experience of being in a bad relationship, or an unhealthy relationship. And so I used food as my crutch. And it just became this negative, overpowering relationship with food. So I think you need to remember that a lot of times we turn to food for a negative reason, because of something that’s happening in our own life, and it’s coming from deep inside. And those are things that you need to face head on; not through eating sh*tty food. And not just say, I’m going through a breakup so I’m going to eat really sh*tty and make myself feel even worse. That’s not what we should be doing.

It wasn’t until probably that, maybe a year after dating my husband. I was in a bad place for a while, and I hated myself. And my husband was like, no more. You’re not doing this. I’m not dealing with it, you’re not doing this. If you want to hate yourself, then you can do it by yourself, but I’m not supporting it at all. And I had to change around that personality trait that I taught myself for so many years. And I had to say, ok I’m in a happy point in my life and I want to become happier. And I’m not going to pull myself down and sabotage myself.

So remember that those behaviors and those food addictions can sometimes come from something that’s happening in our own life, and we kind of have to just face that. And that’s my psychology of the day. You know, I really helped out here.

Ok, more stuff. So here’s the other thing. So many people, I see this all the time, will say, I just ate whatever. I just got really drunk and I had 3 pizzas, and I already did it so I might as well just keep this going. I might as well just keep this weekend going. This sh*tty habit going. And I’ll get my life back together Monday. And I’ve done that many times myself. So, remember to not dwell on these decisions that we make. You have the brain power to make a decision. You can decide to eat something or not eat something. You have the power to do whatever you want and put whatever you want into your body. So if you made the decision to eat 3 pizzas; ok. Time to move on from it. It’s not like you have ruined your entire life, and you might as well keep this f*cking ball going. I hate when people do that. You made a decision. Ok. Let’s get back on.

I don’t really like this, the 80/20 thing. But I’m a firm, 80/20. I try to eat as healthy as possible as much as possible. So when those situations come up, when there’s only pizza at a party. Or we’re on the boat, and there’s not many options, whatever, and I didn’t plan ahead. That when I do eat something, I don’t have to dwell on it, because I’ve eaten so healthy leading up to that moment in time. And then what do I do? I get home. I make something that I know is good for myself. And I get back on that feeling better and feeling happier by eating food that I’m supposed to eat. So don’t dwell on things. We all make decisions, and we all have to choose something. Sometimes we don’t have the best food available. But if you’re eating healthy most of the time. Then it’s going to be much easier to get past that sh*tty time that you went through. And that upset. And that fast food that you had to go through.

So I hope that kind of makes sense. Just not dwelling, and saying, ok, I already sabotaged my diet. Let’s sabotage it more. What are you doing? It’s like, oh I just got in a car accident, I’ll just get into one more on my way home. What? You would never f*cking say that. So why are you saying it with food? It’s the same thing. You are car wrecking your body by putting sh*tty food into it. So why would you continue to do it? Why not say, ok. Whatever. I ate sh*tty food. I’m going to get back on getting some meat and vegetables in my body and feeling better. Does that make sense? Don’t car crash twice. Car food crash. Food. Whatever.

5. Comparison is the thief of joy [47:19]

The other thing is so important {laughs} and you see this happen all the time. And I do this myself all the time, even. The same thing. Do not compare your eating habits, or your decisions, or what you can or can’t have to anyone else. Because their body has nothing to do with your body. So often. How often have you looked at someone and is like, “That person eats McDonald’s every single day, and she looks amazing. Why can’t I do that? This makes no sense. Life is not fair!” I still do that to this day. I can think of a girl at the gym right now who drinks hard every weekend, and who eats sh*tty food, and she looks f*cking amazing. But, she has nothing to do with me. {laughs} Absolutely nothing to do with me. So sure, I can be like, “What the f*ck?” But then I go back and still eat what is best for my body.

And then on the other side, I’ll have friends who I’ll go out with. I was just at an event a couple of weeks ago and one of my friends barely eats anything. And is barely eating any of her meal, and we had a 3 or 4 course meal or something. She’s barely eating any of it. So then a part of me, going back to my childhood feelings, and seeing my friends or my peers not eating. I was like, “Oh, I shouldn’t be eating either.” And I’ll feel that way. So I’m like, I’ll see this friend not eating. And I’m like, f*ck. Should I feel bad that I am eating? And I’m eating everything on my plate and finishing it all. Should I feel bad about that? No. I know what my body needs because I listen to it. And I know that I work hard in the gym, and I need to fuel it, and I need to eat this and not eat that.

I’m thinking about this one dinner. It had this crazy chocolate cake at the end. So I ate the chocolate shell on the outside and not the cake, because I don’t need this gluten cake that makes me feel really sick to my stomach. I just need a little bit of chocolate so I’m enjoying the 4-course meal that we just had without missing out on anything. Feeling like I missed out on stuff. And I’m going to finish almost everything on my plate of all those other plates that were served to us. And even though she’s not eating, it has nothing to do with me.

So stop looking at what other people are doing. Don’t care what other people are doing. If they’re helping you understand food a little bit better, cool. But comparing yourself to others gets you nowhere. And I’ve said this time and time again. Because comparison is the f*cking thief of joy. Somebody told me that one time. Comparing is the thief of joy. Comparison is the thief of joy. And it really is. Because I’ll look at if somebody is not eating something, I’ll feel like maybe I shouldn’t. Or if somebody eats sh*tty food, I’m like, well I should be able to do that too. I work just as hard as them in the gym. Or whatever bullsh*t that you can think up in your head. Stop thinking that stuff. Concentrate on what you can do.

There’s this other girl at our gym. She said something when we were out recently with a bunch of friends. A bunch of people were telling her to drink and just to have pizza with them. And she’s like, I can’t f*cking eat pizza like you guys. I have to keep my diet cleaner to get where I want to. And she looks amazing. And she’s worked so hard on cleaning up her diet and working hard in the gym. She doesn’t compare herself to other, and dwell on what others can or can’t do. She just concentrates on herself, and she is f*cking crushing it. Not only in the gym, but she feels so much better in her skin. Because she’s like, I can’t drink and just eat pizza like you guys. I have to grab the sh*t at Whole Foods and still enjoy my time with you guys. But I have to eat something different because my body is different.

So concentrate on you. Just concentrate on you, ok? That’s all you’ve got to do. Enjoy your life. And concentrate. So let’s review. Let’s review before I end this podcast. So I can get it up this shower, and I can shower this spray tan off, because I’m sticking to literally everything.

So review. Remember, food is fuel. It’s not the enemy. And if it is the enemy, then it’s maybe something you shouldn’t be eating. Just think about if you’re eating this sh*tty ass pizza every Friday night because you just drank super heavily and then you hate yourself Saturday morning. If you have a negative relationship and food feels like the enemy, maybe those are some of the foods you should be cutting out of your diet. Think about it that way. I’m not saying that we should never enjoy situations. But I’m saying you have to find that balance. And find that fine line. And find what’s not good for you, and what’s best for you.

Let’s see. So food is not the enemy. Food is actually energy. Stop thinking of it as a transactional thing. Joy and Claire would say it much more eloquently than me. Girls Gone WOD podcast. If you’re having this negative relationship with food, maybe think about what’s going on in your own life. And if you are using food to deal with an upset in your own life, you need to think of it and see it differently. So really changing your behaviors and using food as fuel and not a negative thing is huge. Think about alcohol. Is alcohol changing your relationship with food? Really think alcohol really does make a huge difference in people’s lives. So it can be really bad. It can be really good, but it can be really bad, too. So keep that in mind.

And remember the more long-term behaviors you keep up with, the positive behaviors with food. Eating healthy, taking care of yourself, and eating healthy on a daily basis, on a regular basis. So when you go to a party and you have something that you normally wouldn’t eat, it’s not a big deal because you take care of yourself the rest of the time. So if you can keep up these long-term, healthy behaviors regularly and not just sabotage the body, then you’re able to eat and not feel like you’re sabotaging. If that makes sense.

And stop f*cking comparing. Do not compare yourself to anyone else ever. Because no one is like you. And that’s the thing. Nobody is like you. That’s it. I guess maybe if you were a twin. Identical twin. But that’s a whole nother science that I don’t f*cking know anything about. And I don’t know many things. But, that’s that guys. That is how I have created a better relationship with food. Stop thinking of it as a negative thing. Think of it as the way that you get to take care of yourself every day, and how lucky you are to actually have a meal every single day. I went there. I went there, guys.

So that’s that. I need to go pack. I need to coach this weekend, so I’ve got to start packing now. I need to do some laundry. I’ve got to go to the mall. I’ve got to get this podcast up. I’ve got to work on some blog posts. I’ve got sh*t to do, man. It’s Saturday! What’s Saturday for? Work. Because my husband works, too. So I’m just working away.

I hope you guys have a wonderful weekend. I hope everything’s great. And yeah. That’s that. I’ll talk to you guys soon. Next week I was going to do my favorite things podcast, and talk about things that I’m loving right now. So stay tuned for that. Follow me on Instagram stories, because I will be sharing my trip and all the restaurants and things that I do in Santa Ynez, if I’m saying that correctly. I have no idea. But I’ll be sharing my experience there and kind of doing a little review on the blog. So follow along on my Instagram stories. Because I’ve been doing that as much as possible.

Ok. I have to pee. I have to go. I hope you have a great day. I’ll talk to you soon. Bye-bye for now.

It took me a long time to create a healthy and happy relationship with food, so I thought I would share my experience and what has worked for me over the years! ____________ Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe […] It took me a long time to create a healthy and happy relationship with food, so I thought I would share my experience and what has worked for me over the years! ____________ Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 56:24
My Experience w/ Orange Theory Fitness – Episode 41: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 01 Jul 2017 13:13:00 +0000 12 Today on the podcast, I’m talking about my experience with adding Orange Theory workouts to my own workout routine and the changes I’ve seen! Plus I’m answering some of your questions about OTF! ____________ Aaptiv is a fitness app that gives you […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking about my experience with adding Orange Theory workouts to my own workout routine and the changes I’ve seen! Plus I’m answering some of your questions about OTF!


Aaptiv is a fitness app that gives you custom workouts with the voice of an elite trainer and an amazing playlist, walking you through the class or workout or training session! They have unlimited workouts such as race training, ab workouts, spinning, strength training, and even more! I’ve been using it for stretching workouts after my CrossFit or Orange Theory classes! To get motivated or simply just get to stretching this 2017, try Aaptiv out for FREE for 30 days using the promo code PALEOMG. Sign up here and try it out for 30 days now!

Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 41 Transcription!

Today’s podcast is brought to you by Aaptiv. Aaptiv is the fitness that brings together the voice of an elite trainer, walking you step-by-step through the workout of your choice. So whether you want to do marathon training, or you want to just train for a 5K, or you want to do yoga, or spinning, or elliptical, or strength training. Whatever you want to do, Aaptiv has it on their app. And they’re constantly adding new workouts, so you can find the perfect workout for you. And you can pick for whatever time you have left in your day. So say you only have 7 minutes. They have a 7-minute workout that you can do. If you only have a couple of minutes, they even have that. Or you can push it longer, from 30 minutes to even longer than that. So you can always have a workout, no matter what your time constraint is. And since it’s on your phone you can do these workouts anywhere. Whether you’re traveling, or you’re just doing a workout in your basement, or you’re garage, or you’re living room. Or even if you’re just at the gym with your headphones in. You can do these workouts anywhere.

And right now, you can try Aaptiv out for 30 days for free. All you have to do is go to and use the promo code PaleOMG. And, when you’re on there once you sign up, you can try out my 7-day challenge. So you just go down to the bottom, to the curated playlist, open that up, and you’ll see PaleOMG. And I have an amazing challenge on there. It’s the Get Strong Challenge, where you have 7 workouts, 7 days, and 7 recipes on there. So you can cook my recipes, do my favorite workouts from the app, and get fit, and get stronger. It’s pretty awesome. So go try Aaptiv out today. It’s Aaptiv, promo code PaleOMG.

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

1. What’s going on with Juli [4:56]
2. Bachelorette recap [17:26]
3. All about Orange Theory [35:16]
4. Starting with weights or treadmill [52:27]
5. Splat points [53:25]
6. Results from Orange Theory [56:52]
7. Choosing between CrossFit and Orange Theory [59:58]
8. Getting better at running [1:02:33]
9. Orange Theory and injury [1:04:40]
10. Strength loss and weight gain [1:09:03]
11. Update on barre [1:10:15]
12. Orange Theory for beginners [1:13:32]
13. Difference in CrossFit and Orange Theory [1:15:22]
14. Heart rate monitors [1:16:25]

Juli Bauer: Hello guys. Welcome to the 41st episode of PaleOMG Uncensored. My name is Juli Bauer, if you haven’t been here before. Actually, my name is Juli Bauer Roth. I think my husband finds it kind of annoying that I still can’t get my name right. Like, the other day I’m having to sign paperwork for his 401K sh*t, and I had to print my name. Because my signature doesn’t look like anything. It looks like a ball of goo. That doesn’t make sense. So I have to print my name. But I’m on the phone with his mother, just so you know. Or maybe it was our accountant. I don’t know. I was on the phone with someone important, and yes, his mother. Ok, yes.

And so what does he have me do? He has me sign. I’m like, cool, whatever. And then he has me print my full name. So what do I do? I do my real name that I’ve had for 28 years of my life. And he; well, he’s in a mood already because he’s overworked. But he’s in a mood. So when I misspell my name, the name that I wrote out for 28 years of my life, he is so annoyed. He’s so annoyed. And I’m like; I’ll go get whiteout. Like, it’s really not a big deal. And you can tell he’s just so annoyed. Like he has to do all his paperwork over. I’m like, what the f*ck? He’s like, you’ve had that name for a year. Oh, I’m sorry. I’ve had a different name for f*cking 28 years, ok? Have you had a different name ever? Oh, no? Ok, no. Then you can go shut your mouth. Did you have to go stand at social security? No, ok you can shut your mouth. Did you have to go to the DMV? Oh, no. You can shut your mouth.

No, I didn’t say any of that stuff. Because that’s not how you have a good marriage. But I did get pissed. I was like, ok. It’s been 28 f*cking years. You know, give my spiel. And I’m like, ok. I’m sorry. I’ll get some whiteout. And he’s like, no, it’s fine. Once he stopped shatting his pants about it. I don’t really know how I got onto that; ok. Yes, I know how I got on this topic. So welcome to the podcast. I’m so grate… god I suck. I’m so happy you came. If you don’t know why you’re on this podcast, you may never know. But my name is Juli Bauer Roth, and I am the creator of Which, I feel like I should do this intro every time. But it’s a lifestyle blog, if you will. I like to concentrate on fashion, fitness, and food. Man. I need to get my sh*t together.

1. What’s going on with Juli [4:56]

OK. Let’s talk about what’s going on. Why I can’t seem to get my sh*t together. So first of all, last week if you listened to the 40th episode, I went off. I was in a big of a mood. Because I don’t think; acupuncture is supposed to release energy, and it’s releasing some sh*tty energy. And man do my traps feel better when I do acupuncture, but I’m a ball of negativity for days. And then it’s gone. So, I was in a mood from my acupuncture. And then we recently painted our house. It was a really ugly brick; all the houses in our neighborhood are 1950s. It was a really ugly brick, and we hated it. So we painted it this dark greyish-blue color. And every single one of our neighbors has complimented us. The neighbor next door. The neighbor a couple of houses down, across the street. The other way, they asked for the painter’s name. And our neighbors that our age; everybody has.

But, there is a woman who has been here since these houses were built, probably in the 1950s. Every time she sees me, she likes to tell me how she bought her house for $50,000. And she’s like, “What did you buy your house for?” I’m like, ok b*tch. Gloria. I know that you know how much I bought my house for. Because you tell me it every time. And you look up what everybody paid. You’re just a real creep. So I go on about this last episode, so I don’t need to go into full detail. But she comes up to me, and she b*tches about how we painted our house. She says it sticks out like a sore thumb. And this woman, she likes to roam the neighborhood. And she likes to wander into people’s yards. I see her do this all the time. Just yesterday, I was outside because we’re getting landscaping done. And what’s she doing? I look over, she’s just standing on the sidewalk. Just looking over at our house. Creeping so hard.

So, I watch her, and I tell our landscaping guy. I’m like, “Do not get in a conversation with her, because you will die on our property. She will literally talk to you until you die.” So, as I’m talking to the landscaper, I watch her, and she’s wandering into the neighbor’s yard. And the thing about this neighbor is he owns this house, doesn’t take care of it. It’s like falling apart. It’s like the eyesore of the neighborhood. And I don’t give a sh*t, probably because I don’t live next door to him. But he lives in another house a couple of houses down. {laughs} It’s so strange. But he owns this house, and it’s just a sh*t storm.

But she’s wandering into his yard, and into the backyard. Like, that is illegal. That’s trespassing! You can get shot for that stuff. I listen to a lot of true crime podcasts, and that is a lot of people’s alibis. Or I don’t know if it’s alibi, but it’s like, they were trespassing. They were on my property. Yeah, I could shoot them. Gloria, you’re going to get shot, man.

So anyways. I talk about this. I complain about her. I called her an old hag. I know that was out of line. I’m a young hag. I’m not quite old yet. But I’m a young hag, ok. So that just doesn’t have the best ring to it. But I called her this, and this girl on Instagram went off at me. How I was so mean, I forget what she said. But she was just saying how mean I was. So I apologized. I’m like, I’m sorry it upset you. Have a great day. And then she blocked me on Instagram. I went back later to see if she responded, and she had blocked me. {laughs} I was like, what? It’s just so strange.

So, I apologize if my truth upset anyone. She is very rude, and she’s old, and she’s haggish. I don’t really know what hag means. But I’m young and haggish. I’m calling me a young hag. I’ll be an old hag at some point. I won’t be a b*tch to my neighbors. Oh my god I shouldn’t say b*tch. That just sounds really mean. But I won’t be rude to my neighbors. Because here’s the thing. It’s their property. You know? They can do what they want. And sometimes you’ve just got to go with the flow. I know it’s hard to when you get older, but I have this friend who their parents are in their 70s. 70s. And I think it’s early 70s, maybe it’s late 60s. I don’t want to say it wrong and then if they ever hear this, I’m calling them older than they are. But that’s beside the point.

They CrossFit. They eat paleo. One of my friends, he just started to become a DJ, and his parents go to all of his shows at these sketchy ass night clubs. Just different shows that have sketchy ass people at them. And his parents go. And the mom dances like a badass chick. You know why? Because she went with the flow. And she’s cute as can be. And she’s f*cking crossfitting, and she’s being a bad ass. I’m going to be like that when I’m older. I don’t want to be the person who stands out in the middle of the road judging other people’s lawns. OK? So I’m sorry if I upset anybody. But I’m not sorry. I know that’s rude, but I’m just not sorry.

Ok, moving on. So this is the other drama going on in our neighborhood. I’ve told you guys; I don’t know where I talked about it before. Probably on Snapchat when I used to do Snapchat. I just don’t get on Snapchat anymore. I don’t even check Kaitlyn Bristow’s Snapchat, because there are just too many social media outlets, and I feel overwhelmed by it. By the way, you should totally listen to Kaitlyn Bristow’s Off the Vine, if you like Bachelor stuff. Or just a funny b*tch. She’s freaking hilarious.

So, I am outside. No, I was driving up, about to turn in my driveway, and I see the neighbor kid that I’ve talked about on Snapchat do a little drug deal. So here’s the thing about the neighbor. I mean, literally, our neighborhood reeks like weed all the time. Because they smoke so much weed. I think there are three kids who lives in this house, the youngest being probably 14 or 15. But I think they all live at home still, even if they’re over 18. And the youngest one is just going through a phase. I mean, I’ve been there. I’ve been there. I’ve been up to no good. And he’s a little dick.

So, a package went missing once, of course I blame it on him. I have no idea if he stole the package. But I just guessed, because I trust no one. And he’s home all the time. Especially now that the summer is going, he’s home all the time. And one day I was taking out the trash at 6:30 in the morning. Think about when you were aged 15. It’s 6:30 in the morning. I’m in my pajamas, wheeling out the trash. And something catches the side of my eye, and it’s this neighbor kid; 13-15, whatever age he is. And we have this planter in front of our house that’s kind of attached to our house. It’s hard to explain. But it’s like a big, long planter. And he’s sitting on it, in our yard, smoking a bowl. And as soon as he sees me; I wave to him, and then he shoots over into his yard. Like, ok.

So he’s obviously trying to hide that he’s smoking weed from his parents. Which I see his dad smoking weed all the time. While he’s driving. Unless you smoke your tobacco out of a pipe. Whatever. So he runs into the yard. And then Jackson; we have this bush that fits between both of our yards. And the landscapers just cut it super far back, because it kind of overtakes our yard. So we have to just cut it down, because it’s not our bush. I always see the kid run into that bush, and grab something. And Jackson will always go to that bush and try to go deep inside of it to get something. So I feel like he hides his stash in there. Whatever.

So I’m driving up the other day, turning up into my driveway, and I see him pass money to a guy driving. The other guy hands him a bag. They switch, and the car drives off. It’s just like, super fast. The car is not even really stopping. Super fast transaction. So I just don’t think much of it. I am not like a person who fears drugs, by any means. And I don’t give a sh*t. Colorado is legal weed at this point. I don’t give a sh*t what kind of drugs you’re doing. But if you’re bringing sketchiness into the neighborhood; when I bought this f*cking house. Ugh. I’m not into it.

So then I’m talking to our other neighbor just today as I was taking Jackson out for a walk, and she was like, “I just want to let you know that I think I saw a drug deal go down.” And I was like, what the! I did too! So this is obviously happening on a regular basis. And I literally trust no one. No one. I trust my husband at this point, but still. Arm’s length. No, I trust Jackson. I’m kidding you guys, stop jumping to conclusions. So, now I feel like; I feel like I need to get some cameras outside. I don’t want to be like Gloria, down the street. But people can paint their house whatever color they want to do. If they’re dealing drugs and bringing sketchy ass people in the neighborhood, you’ve got to keep your eye out a little bit more. Right? Sketchy.

I mean, drug deals; literally, the last place we lived in downtown Denver, my husband and I before we moved into our house, we were pretty much in the heart of downtown Denver in a neighborhood called Uptown. And I would drive to our apartment, and I’d be stopped at a stoplight, and I would see people sharing needles. So I’ve seen a lot of sh*t. And I don’t give a sh*t about weed. But. Weed is legal. Why would need to do a drug deal? I guess because he’s like 15. But don’t you have people who would buy that for you? I don’t know. It just seems super sketchy. So that’s what’s going down.

Don’t you think Gloria should be paying attention to that? She’s like paying attention to what color I’m painting my house, but she’s not paying attention to the drug deals that are going down pretty close to her house. I don’t know. I don’t know, guys. That’s what I say. So that’s what’s going down here.

We have lived in our house for 2 years, and we’re finally getting landscaping done. Because I don’t know if you know this, but landscaping is super f*cking expensive. Dammit. I’m recording on my phone, and the phone started ringing and cut me off. So, ok. Apologize for that. I don’t know who calls me on a Friday. But the landscaping is very expensive. So then you have to save all your money to be able to do anything. You don’t want to be the ugly house on the block. So anyways, we finally saved enough. We have our landscaping starting. I’m so pumped about it, so we can be a cool house in the neighborhood. Just a guy stopped me on our walk today. He lives two houses down, and I really want his garage door. And he said, “I love what you did to your house.” And I said, “I really want your garage door.” And he said, “Don’t copy me.” But I might. And then our dogs tried to attack each other. It was quite lovely.

2. Bachelorette recap [17:26]

Anywho. Let’s talk about what’s been going on in the world. AKA, on the Bachelorette. Let’s do a little recap. I honestly don’t know if I can remember everything. Because it was two nights. Two. And I literally have already blacked out the second episode. Because I did a recap on my blog of the first episode; but you’re going to give me 4 hours of the Bachelorette where nothing happens. It’s like, I wonder how they pick what stuff they air. Because so much happens on this show, and then they spend 45 minutes out of 2 hours concentrating on Lee and Kenny staring at each other. Think about all the stuff they missed in between that would have been funny. Put some flair in there. Put some humor. They do one blooper at the end; people love the bloopers, obviously. That’s why they give you bloopers at the end of the entire season. So why not throw a little bit of humor in there, you know?

Anyways. Let’s talk about; I literally blacked out the second episode. But we’ll talk about the first episode. Hopefully this sparks some memory. Ok. So they’re in Hilton Head. Which I really want to go to Hilton Head. I’ve talked about this 20 times now. And I love; I’ve always wanted to go to Hilton Head, so I’m really jealous. So they start up, this is where Kenny and Lee really start their feud. So Kenny is the wrestler. He’s bad panda, smushy head. I don’t know what his name is called. I forget. But he is fighting with Lee. Lee is the tiny guy with the huge hair, and he’s the racist. So yeah, of course it’s going to happen.

Whatever. They have some sort of fight, and Kenny keeps calling Lee a snake. And he’s like, “He’s just a snake, a snake. And he’s a snake. And he’s a snake. And he’s a snake. And all snaking around, and he snakes. And then he snakes. And you know how those snaky snakes.” I’m like, stop saying f*cking snake. I can’t do it. But of course, Lee makes it through. Because the producers are like, keep Lee once more. We need to do the two on one, and we don’t have anybody else for the two on one.

So then; ok, this is the best. Jack Stone. Sorry, I have to move if this sounds weird. I’ve got give Jackson his little blanket to lay on in the front door, because he likes to lie in the sun. Ok, so Jack Stone. Mr. Jack Stone. This guy. This poor guy is such a cutie, and he’s so awkward on camera. And the editors did not do him any favors. So Jack Stone and Rachel go on their one on one date, and they go shuck oysters. And they’re dunking it; balls deep in it. Deep throating it, if you will. Sorry if that was too visual. But they’re deep-throating oysters. I don’t know. If it were me, I’d be like, “Hey, this is our first date. Let’s not go eat oysters.” But, to each their own. The producers were trying to sabotage this from the beginning.

So they’re sucking down goo. And Jack Stone is trying to go in for the first kiss, but he’s kind of saying that he might be sick. And she’s like, “Ok, I don’t want you to be sick.” And it’s like, this poor guy. He has such blinders on. He keeps trying to kiss her, and her body language is just like, “Get away from me.” And he’s just so cute. But this poor guy. He tilts his head down, like chin tucked like this. You can hear it. You know what I’m doing. And then he looks out of the top of his eyes. Ok, can you picture me right now? Ok. So that’s what he does. And he looks like a serial killer, for sure. But like a serial killer with really, really nice veneers. So you’re like, ok maybe I can trust him. Maybe he won’t kill me. It’s his MO, but maybe he won’t kill me. I’m different.

So he tries to keep kissing her. She’s not into it. And then they go in for dinner. They had a really good looking burger. I was like, damn they went all out on this fake food today. They had a burger with gigantic fries. I was really f*cking jealous. So anyway, Rachel does her significant move. Which she needs to be slapped in the face, because this is a dick move. And she’s a cool, she seems like a cool level-headed person. And what does she do? She takes the rose. Just like she did with the guy that she went to summer camp with. She takes the rose, and Jack gets his hopes up, and he lifts his chin, and he’s just proud. And she’s like, I’m just not into you. And poor Jack Stone, who could not stop smiling the whole date. Because he’s like, “I could see myself marrying her.” And he just sucked down oysters, so he has the aphrodisiacs just burning through him. And she’s like, yeah, no.

So this guy, who could not stop talking the entire date, finally falls silent. And Rachel’s waiting for something, and he just doesn’t say anything. So Rachel’s like, yeah I don’t know what else to say. Can I walk you out? Walks him out. He leaves. And then honestly, does he say anything? I have to yawn. Oh my god. I’m even standing right now. So he doesn’t say anything in the car. Not that I remember. You know, I blacked out most of this. But, this guy who was the creepiest creep, serial killer creep looking, he finally looks really cute. It’s very strange.

So I just want to let you know a reader wrote onto blog, and was like, I went to high school with Jack Stone. She’s like, I always had a crush on him. But he looked so creepy on the show. I just had to add that in there, because I thought that was a fun fact.

Ok, let’s see what else happens. So Rachel skips happy hour. Or {laughs} happy hour. Cocktail hour. And she moves on to kicking off Iggy. Which, Iggy. Hold on, I have to drink water. My face broke out this week because I haven’t been drinking any water, and I’m so dehydrated. No more zits! Ok, so she kicks off Iggy. That’s the guy who looks like a sumo wrestler. If you listen to the podcast the Rose Pricks, they call him Moana, {laughs} and I die laughing every time they call him Moana. He looks like Moana. Oh my gosh, you can’t listen to this huh, because you’re yawning. You have to leave. I have so many people leave because of it. It’s a very big problem.

Ok, so Moana gets kicked off. I stole that from the Rose Pricks. And Tickle Monster. And it’s too bad. Did you know Tickle Monster is a doctor? What the f*ck? So he gets kicked off, and he tickles her. I just love him. I just love that he got the name Tickle Monster, when he’s a doctor. Whatever.

Ok, they’re like, “We’re going to Norway!” I’ve personally never wanted to go to Norway because it’s cold. So when they’re like, “We’re going to Norway!” I’m like, what a sh*t thing. So, ok. Let’s see what else happens. Ok, so she goes on a date with Bryan with a “Y”, which I hate that spelling. {laughs} I just hate everything. Because my husband’s name is Brian with an “I” and I think that’s just the way you should spell it. Bryan. Ok, so they go on some date where they go up a ski jump. And I’m pretty sure it was called Helen Colon. Like, Hello Colon. It had something with a Colon at the end. And it would look like an ice luge. I’m like; that’s a weird way to put it, but whatever.

So they go up on the top of this ski jump, and then they; I forget what it’s called. But when you take a rope all the way down. You’re just like, f*cking hanging. And they’re hanging off the ground, pulling themselves down the rope. I forget what it’s called. I know you’re telling me, but I’m not listening. So, they’re going down, and Bryan’s like, “Let’s kiss!” You’re like, dude. I’m literally pissing my pants right now, and you want to make out? Oh, do you want to see that I just took a dump because I’m so scared? Yeah, let’s make out. That’s totally hot. So they make out.

And that’s literally all they do on all their dates. Is just make out. They like to make out all the time. More power to them. And what does Bryan do? He says, “I’m falling in love with you.” Surprise, surprise, he gets a rose. He knows how to play this game.

Ok, so next they go on this group date in Norway and they play the Norway sport of handball. It’s like a mix of 47 sports. They’re like, it’s a mix of basketball, football, soccer, volleyball. It’s a mix of all sports. And they’re wearing wrestling spandex. Like, little onesies. Jumpsuits. I don’t know what they’re called. It’s just really obnoxious. But, Dean comes out in his jockstrap on the outside, and I love him for that. What a little gem.

So they play these sports, and it’s just super boring, and I hate all of it. And then, let’s see. Josiah starts to get super cocky, and he talks like this. “I. Am. Super. Into you. And I. Know. That you. Are super into me.” He talks with these long pauses that are so unneeded. And he’s very intelligent, and very articulate, and he just does these stupid pauses. And he’s like, “She’s going to marry me. She’s so in love with me.” And then he flexes his boobs. Because he thinks he has the best man breasts of all time.

Ok, so they have this group date now. They’re all hanging out in a house, like their normal cocktail hour hangout, go hangout with Rachel alone. And so her and Peter go off, and Peter is my favorite. I have a feeling that Peter doesn’t win, and he becomes the next Bachelor. I have 100% no idea if that’s true, because I don’t read that stuff. But yeah. That’s what I think happens. So anyways, she’s super into Peter. She’s like, “Why aren’t you kissing me?” And he’s like, “Ok, I’ll kiss you.” And then she’s like, “Do you want to go in the hot tub?” It’s like, ok. And this is a group date going on. They’re not on a one on one date. They’re on a group date, and she’s like, “Let’s go in the hot tub.” And they are banging it out in this hot tub. She is grinding up on it. No holding back. Her poor judge of a father. He’s like a federal judge or something is just rolling in his grave. He’s not dead, but he’s rolling in his grave. Because he died watching it. Oh man. She was humping the sh*t out of Peter.

So they go back. They dry off. They’re like, oh, let’s redo our hair. And they go back to the group, and the guys like, you’ve been gone for 3 hours. 3 hours? How pissed would you be? You’re just sitting in a roomful of dudes. And he’s banging one out. Yeah. That’s so awkward, right? Go you, Rachel.

Ok, so the end, they have the two on one date with Lee and Kenny, surprise, surprise. And Lee lies. They’re just tattle telling on each other; just being little b*tches. And Lee lies and says that Kenny pushed him out of a car or some bullsh*t. And Lee says, “I’ll pray for you.” I hate when people do that sh*t. Do not use religion in a f*cked up way. So you’re being an asshole, and you’re like, “I’ll pray for you.” And you call yourself a good Christian boy? You’re a dick. You know that. I just hope Lee gets pooped on by a hawk. Those poops have to be really big, right?

So whatever. They have this feud. And then Kenny’s like {laughs} so he finds out Lee lied, and he walks back over to Lee, I’ll call Lee her. And he’s like, “Oh god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh. My. God.” And then he just starts laughing. And he’s like {laughs}. Like, ok. Kenny; you’ve f*cking lost it. You need to go back home to your daughter, because you have f*cking lost it. The show ends where it looks like Kenny is going to punch his face in. And then there’s a preview, and Lee; god I can’t get these names right. Kenny has his face bashed in. Whatever, whatever. Nothing happens.

So the next episode starts. She kicks off Lee; surprise, surprise. And goes back in the helicopter to leave Lee on a deserted Norway island, wherever the f*ck they are. The normal head out that they do. And Kenny’s like, wait, I’ve got to go talk to him. {laughs} It’s like, you’re literally in a helicopter about to leave with a chick, and you’re like, nope. I’ve got to go talk to this Lee kid. Ok. You’re the worst. So he goes over, and says oh my god more. And yells at him. And it’s really dumb.

So, then, I don’t know what else they do. God, I can’t remember any of the dates. They had this one date where they had to be Vikings, and that’s where Kenny gets his eye cut. And then Adam, maybe, gets his eye cute. And then this guy Matt is still there. You know what I’m talking about? Like, who is this guy Matt? He hasn’t got any sort of dates. But he’s just still there. And he still gets featured. I’m like, who are you? It’s so strange. I literally can’t remember anything else that happened. Viking date.

Oh, yeah. She goes on a one on one date with Eric, and Eric becomes a child, and just can’t stop talking. Like, freaking Rachel pulls up in a boat, and Eric’s like, “Am I going with you? Am I coming in? Am I getting out? Am I going in? Am I coming out? Am I getting in? Am I getting out? Am I getting in? Do you want me to get in? You want me to get in?” And she’s trying to say no, but he’s just like, “Eh, you want me to get in, you want, yeah, yeah, yeah, eh?” I hate. I don’t. I shouldn’t say I hate Eric, but not into him. But they’re super into each other.

I don’t really know what else happens. But I still think it’s going to be between Bryan and Peter. That’s all I know. And I think it’s going to be Bryan, and I think Peter is going to be the next Bachelor. Because I personally don’t want to date a guy with cheek injections. I don’t know if a lot of women do. I don’t know. I’m saying Bryan has cheek injections. I want cheek injections, for sure. But I don’t want to date a guy with them.

3. All about Orange Theory [35:16]

Ok, that’s that. That’s all I have to say about that. Ok, is that cool? Is that cool with you? Ok. Let’s have a water break. I feel like this is really loud; my water bottle is really loud. So, today I was at my Orange Theory class. I’m running at a push pace. It’s 3 minutes a push, so you have a lot of f*cking time to think about things. And I’m like, what am I going to talk about on my podcast today? I have no idea. And there, I’m doing it. That’s exactly what I’ll talk about. Is Orange Theory. Because I get a lot of questions now that I’ve been doing Orange Theory more often. So I thought I would share my experience, and what it’s been like. And what I think about it. And I asked on Instagram for people to ask some questions if they had any. So I thought I’d answer a couple of those questions. And that would be that.

So, let’s chat. Let’s talk about Orange Theory. Ok. So Orange Theory is heart rate monitored fitness, if you will. It is; well, ok. I’m going to start from the beginning. How I kind of got into it. I was on book tour with my friend Vanessa from She also has a cookbook. We were going on book tour together. And she was super into Orange Theory, and she was not into CrossFit. So she was like, “When we go on our book tour, can we go to Orange Theory classes. I don’t like CrossFit right now.” And I was like, sure whatever. I don’t give a sh*t.

So we go to Orange Theory, and they hook me up with a heart rate monitor. They kind of walk me through what’s going to happen. When you’re in a class, every class is a little bit different. You might have a 1 group, you might have a 2 group, and you might have a 3 group. So 1 group would just be you’re all moving together. 2 group is half are on the floor, half are on the treadmills or the rowers and then you switch. And 3 group kind of switches station to station. So treadmills, rowers, and floor.

So they hook me up to a heart rate monitor, explain how it kind of goes down, and then they explain the screen. So when you have your heart rate monitor on, up on the screen it has a breakdown of what your heart rate is at that time, and it has calories, it has these things called splat points, and beats per minute, maybe. I forget what else. So you can look up at the screen at any point, or the coaches can as well, and see what your breakdown is. What zone you’re in. And they’ll kind of tell you; ok, you need to get out of that red zone. Or you need to get into the green zone. And it’s like blue zone is just kind of walking pace; I’m just generally speaking right now. So blue is kind of walking, green is going to be that you’ve picked it up a little bit more, kind of a base pace. Yellow is pushing it, or maybe it’s orange. Sorry, orange. And then red is your all-out sprint.

So, on the screen of your treadmill, it has what a base pace should look like, what a push pace should look like, and what all-out should look like. So you kind of have to gauge it the first time you go in. They’ll explain stuff to you, but you have to kind of figure out what a good base pace is for you. And it takes a little bit, you know? So I started my base pace off at 6 miles per hour, I think that’s what it is; 6. And then over time, sometimes I’ll be at a 6, sometimes I’ll be anywhere from 6 to 6.5 for my base pace. Let’s take a breath, ok.

So I’ll be there at 6 to 6.5 for my base pace. And this is a pace that I could have a conversation with someone. I feel comfortable in it, and I can recover during this pace. And then push pace for me is from 7 to 7.5. that’s a good push pace for me. And then all out sprint is 10 to 10.5. I feel like it took me some time to work up the courage to get to that 10 to 10.5. that was a scary number for me. But now I feel comfortable going to that, even at a 1-minute all-out pace, I’ll get to 10 and I know many people who are way over that. But that’s my comfortable, 10 to 10.5 for all-out pace.

So how the class is set up. You have your heart rate monitor on, you have the screen on, so you can check where you’re at. And a coach is walking you through everything. So we’ll just say we have a 2 group. So half of the people are on a treadmill, and half of the people are on the floor. So they’ll say, ok treadmills get into base pace. Get your heart rate up. And then they’ll go explain on the floor, on the weight section, what they’re going to do. And they have a screen up, as well, that goes through the movements. So say you’re doing biceps curls, push press, and burpees. It’s going to have that on the screen. But the coach goes through that, and goes over however many repetitions you should be doing, and how long it’s going to be.

After she explains that, and you get started, she goes back to the treadmills, and she’s like, ok we’re going to go into 3-minute push pace. You turn up your treadmills, 3 minutes here. And she walks you through everything. She or he. So today, we had a 3-minute push pace, 1-minute base, 90-sec push pace, 1-minute all out. Something like that. And they’re usually kind of broken down into different sets. So say you have that; after your sprint you’re going to walk it out for a minute or so. And then you’re going to get into that second set, and that’s when the floor changes over to their next movements, and she gets them started in their next movements. She comes back to you and tells you exactly what you’re going to do.

Sometimes the treadmills are paired with the rowers, so you might be doing treadmill to rower. The weights might be moving onto the rowers. Every day is totally different. All Orange Theory’s around the country do the same workout, as far as I know. I know sometimes the set ups are different, because they have different set ups for 1 group, 2 group, or 3 group. But the workouts are exactly the same. On my blog, on, I have a weekly workouts post every Monday. And I actually like the workouts. So there’s an Orange Theory forum, and someone puts the workouts up that go live every day. So if you ever wanted to look what they look like, I link those workouts. The ones I did. So you can kind of see it.

So yeah. It’s an hour-long class. And you’re pretty much constantly moving the entire time, unless she’s explaining something to you. But you’re constantly moving. And it sends you a breakdown every class, as soon as you finish the class. It breaks down your calories, your splat points, your average beats per minute. And what the splat points are are the time that you’re in the orange and red zone. So that’s you’re push pace and your all-out sprint. And they say that the goal is to get 12 minutes in that orange zone. And if you get 12 minutes, they say you’re going to have this afterburn effect for the next 12 hours that you’re going to be burning more calories than you would if you didn’t get there. Something along those lines.

For me, I get way more splat points than that. I feel like my heart rate is in that orange and red zone a lot of the time. So I’ll kind of talk about that in a second. But I did these Orange Theory workouts while I was on book tour. And I probably did like 6 of them, 6 or more. And then I didn’t do them again for maybe a year, year and a half. Probably a good year. Jackson, do not bark. What a dick.

So I did these workouts for 7 or so classes. Didn’t do it again for a year, or a year and a half, or whatever. And then I was just doing CrossFit 5 days a week. Because that’s what I had been doing Orange Theory, too. Just that CrossFit. So I went back to that. And I just got a little bored. I wasn’t into the programming at our gym. And I wasn’t into some of the drama going down. Drama for your mama. So I was like, you know, there’s an Orange Theory really close to me. I love those workouts. And they have a little bit more convenient time. At our CrossFit gym, we have 6, 7, and 9 a.m. classes. And this Orange Theory has 5:30, 6:30, 7:30, 8:30. All back to back. So I can go at 8 a.m. instead of 7 or 9. 7 is too early, 9 is too late. And my CrossFit gym is farther away. The Orange Theory is literally 5 minutes away, so it’s so easy to get to.

So I just wanted something different. I was getting bored at the gym. I wanted longer workouts, because I like some of those longer workouts. And we were doing a lift and then an 8-minute sprint. And I don’t think that’s bad, by any means. But I just like having something different. I want to spice it up. I don’t want to just do 8-minute sprints all day, every day, and that’s what it was feeling like with the programming at my CrossFit gym.

So I joined Orange Theory. And I have the pack that’s 2 classes a week. So I do 3 CrossFit workouts and 2 Orange Theory workouts. And I just love the longer workouts. And I love the breakdown that you get. It tells you all your breakdown. And it gives you a breakdown of how many calories you’ve burned in the year that you’ve been doing Orange Theory. All the year classes you’ve done. I think that’s really cool. I’m not a calorie counter. I don’t give a sh*t about calories. But I like having that number, because calories or splat points or some kind of number on there that you’re like, ok how did it compare to another day? Because for the longest time with CrossFit I had this goal of, ok I want to get a new one-rep max. Or I want to beat this time from last time. But I don’t give a sh*t about that stuff anymore. So it’s kind of fun to have some sort of goal nowadays. Or just number to work towards in a class. And that’s what I kind of do.

On average I burn 650 to 700 calories per hour in Orange Theory, so that’s kind of the number that I go for. That’s what I’m trying to aim for every time. I have no idea if it’s accurate. 100% no idea. I have never really trusted heart rates or any of those watches. They can tell you all the want, but how do you know they’re right? You don’t. You just guess. And people always ask me, “Do you know if those numbers are accurate?” I’m like, I have no f*cking idea. But I don’t know if I wore a watch if it was accurate, either.

And someone told me that the Orange Theory heart rate monitors are one of the best heart rate monitors out there. They have the best system. I don’t know if that’s true either. So I don’t know. But I don’t really care. It just gives me some sort of number to work towards every class. And that’s what kind of keeps pushing me through a class. And I like looking up at the board and seeing how many splat points I’ve burned compared to other people. That’s just the competitor in me, I guess. Because when I was a competitive crossfitter, I always was keeping an eye on the person next to me. And I still do that in classes, in certain workouts. Some workouts I’m like, “I can’t stay with this person.” But other times I’m like, “Ok, stay with them. You can stay with them.” And I keep an eye on them. And I do that same thing with splat points. I’m like, ok, you can get there. But I don’t know if they’re accurate at all.

So I’ve really loved going to those classes. What’s kind of nice is when I go to my CrossFit gym; I’ve been at this CrossFit gym for 6 years. I coach there. I know everyone there. And I want them to feel welcome every time they’re in there, so I talk to people. And I’m having conversations. I usually get there early. I’m staying there after class. Because these are my friends. And most people who were at my wedding were gym members. These are my close friends. And it’s so nice when I just need a workout and I need to go, to go into Orange Theory, not talk to anyone, get my workout in, and leave. And not have any conversations. I’ll say hi to the coaches. I’m super friendly. But I just don’t have these relationships that I have with CrossFit. And that’s really nice for me sometimes when I literally need to get out the door and need to get back to work and get my sh*t done. So I like that.

But, that is I think a negative. And I don’t know what all Orange Theory’s are like. But CrossFit has the community. It has the comradery. It has the friendship. And that’s how every CrossFit I’ve ever been to has always been. Especially my gym. Everyone is friends. Everyone goes out. It’s amazing. And you don’t get that with Orange Theory, that I have seen. Because they’re just short classes. You don’t really hang out. There’s not much space to hang out afterwards. So yeah. But I know my gym does a lot, my Orange Theory gym does a lot of, I think they climbed the incline recently. They have running clubs. They have brunch and workouts together. They do fitness on the rocks at Red Rocks together. So I know they do stuff, and try to create a community. And I probably just don’t involve myself in it. So I could be talking out my ass at this point. And I’ve been in my CrossFit community for so long, so I just really am close to all those people. But that’s the downside, I think, is you don’t have quite the community as you get with CrossFit.

For results-wise, physically, I think my body has done well with Orange Theory. I need to make sure that sometimes I’m not in the red zone too long, because I can get there sometimes too long, depending on the workout. And that red zone, that heart rate where your heart is about to explode, you just don’t need to be there for a long time, and sometimes I can push it for too long. And I did that same thing with CrossFit too often, and I think that can really hurt the body more than it can help the body sometimes. And that’s when I was falling into having a ton of health issues, because I was keeping the body almost in this fight or flight mode for so long. And the body just goes into adrenal fatigue from there.

So yeah. That’s the experience I’ve had. My body takes well to it when I’m not crazy over-doing it. But I think my body has physically changed a little bit more. I think my legs have changed a little bit more since I’ve been doing Orange Theory. But it’s hard to know sometimes. Because I’ve also been a little bit better with not overdoing it on sugar lately. And sugar is huge. As soon as you cut out sugar, you can see the difference in your body, I think, for most people. So it’s hard to know what key factors are playing a key into body changes.

But I’ve loved the 3 days of CrossFit, 2 days of Orange Theory. That’s worked really well for me. And I have 2 days off in between. I take Thursdays off, and I take Sundays off. And that schedule has really, really worked for my body. And I love it. So that’s kind of the breakdown of Orange Theory versus CrossFit.

4. Starting with weights or treadmill [52:27]

So I wanted to answer some questions. I asked people to ask questions on my Instagram, and it was kind of short notice. So I apologize if you ask a question and I don’t answer it. It’s probably because I already recorded this podcast. So feel free to leave a question on this blog post talking about this podcast.

Ok, so it’s Jenna. That’s her name. Says, “Do you prefer to start on the treadmill or weights and why?” So I prefer, I always start on the treadmill. And when they’re like, “Can someone move to the rower?” I don’t f*cking budge. {laughs} But I think I need to get my heart rate up right away to be able to keep that heart rate high, and steady, the entire time. If I start on the weights, I have a harder time getting my heart rate up depending on what the weight section is. If it’s not these full body movements, it’s just a little bit harder to get that heart rate up. So I always start on the treadmill because I want to be able to keep my heart rate higher the entire time. That’s why.

5. Splat points [53:25]

Ander Beth. I think that’s what it was. “What do you think about splat points claim where you burn a certain extra amount of calories over the next 12 hours? How does this differ from CrossFit?” You know, I have no idea if these facts that they’re giving out are true. No matter what, if you are working out and you are lifting weights, you are going to continuously burn calories throughout the day versus a person who is completely sedentary and not doing anything. If you’re lifting weights, you’re boosting that metabolism and you’re going to burn more calories long-term. So, it’s definitely true. I don’t know about this certain number of splat points. I don’t know what their magic number is. And how they’ve chosen that, because I don’t care enough to look into it. But if you’re lifting weights, and you’re working cardio as well, you’re going to burn more calories long-term.

It’s the same thing with CrossFit. And depending on your gym; every CrossFit gym programs differently. But at our gym we’re always lifting weights. We’re always doing some sort of lifting or gymnastics. And then we’re always doing some sort of cardio. And people are always like, “Don’t you not do cardio in CrossFit?” And I think people think of cardio as running on the treadmill. On the elliptical. On the bike. But when you are, say you’re doing a workout that has power cleans, and then running, and then handstand pushups. All of that is cardiovascular. It’s not like you’re not using your lungs and are pushing yourselves. You’re still getting cardio in there. You’re just not thinking of that as cardio because you’re not just running on a treadmill. Or not doing just cardiovascular things, if that makes sense.

So, CrossFit and Orange Theory are different, but they have many similar things. What I like about doing both is when you go into CrossFit, you have a barbell. And most gyms that I’ve been to, at least, most gyms are very barbell involved. So you’re doing Olympic lifts. You’re doing front squats, back squats, overhead squats. Deadlift. You’re doing a lot of movements with the barbell. And since the barbell is either 35 or 45 pounds most of the time, you’re going to put, if you’re deadlifting. Just 125. Maybe not even that much. Just average 125, and you’re doing that in a workout. If you’re in Orange Theory, and you have deadlifts. It’s not as possible to do 125-pound deadlift with dumbbells. They don’t have barbells in there. They have dumbbells.

So you’re getting much more strength, and pushing yourself in a different way in CrossFit than you would with Orange Theory. So I really take Orange Theory, the opportunity to pull back on my weights, go lighter, go a little bit faster. And yeah. They’re just two different things, but very similar concepts at the same time. I hope that makes sense. But no matter what, if you are lifting and if you are pushing your body in the gym, you’re going to burn calories long-term. Because you’re increasing that metabolism with this muscle that you’re building.

6. Results from Orange Theory [56:52]

Kaylin. “What results should I expect from this type of workout? Fat loss? Strength? Endurance? Any tips for loosening up my calves?” It sounds like she has some issues with running on the treadmill. And actually right now I’m stretching out my calves, because that made me think of mine, as well. Mine were tightening up, for sure.

So I think you can expect all kinds of different things from Orange Theory. It depends what you put into it. So a lot of times, in Orange Theory. And I see this because I see two different gyms. I see CrossFit, where we are often pushing the women. I only push the women how far they want to go, but I’m pushing a woman to do 85-pound push jerks in a workout, because I know she physically can. And Orange Theory you don’t really see that with many coaches. They’re not pushing women or men to do more weight. I have seen one coach, she’s the manager of that gym. I have seen her do that. But not many people are pushing people to do heavier weights. So it’s a little bit harder to get more into the strength portion. You can totally get stronger, but not to the same degree that you can in other sports, such as CrossFit or Olympic lifting. That sort of thing.

I think you can definitely expect to lose some weight depending what size you are and how hard you’re working in the gym and what your diet is, most importantly. Most importantly. Fat loss comes from 80% diet, I think, personally. But endurance as well. A couple of people have mentioned at my CrossFit gym that my endurance has increased. Probably because of the Orange Theory classes that I’m doing. Because there was a workout that had running, bike on the airdyne, and burpees.

And, anyway. I beat everybody in the class by a good amount, because probably that endurance that I’ve built up from Orange Theory that those crossfitters aren’t getting on a regular basis. Because with Orange Theory, usually when I’m on the treadmill, depending on what day it is, I’ll run 3 to 4 miles. And in CrossFit, I would never run 3 to 4 miles. The most we ever run is 2 miles when we do the workout Murph on Memorial Day. So you can get all kinds of different outcomes, it just depends what you put into it.

Oh, and loosening up your calves. Definitely rolling them out on a roller. Make sure your rolling side to side, not just with the length of the muscle. Move side to side on a roller. Get a lacrosse ball, and you can really dig it into parts of your calf to loosen it up. So towards the back of the knee, so towards the crease of your leg, if that makes sense. And then towards the ankle, as well, making sure you’re rolling out the ankle and Achilles. And that should help for sure. Yeah.

7. Choosing between CrossFit and Orange Theory [59:58]

Ok, let’s see other questions. This is from Theogauzy. I don’t know what it’s called. “How many times a week is too many times? I guess the big question is, if I can only afford one; CrossFit or Orange Theory, and my fitness goals are to be lean, long, and to look good naked, what’s the better choice long-term? I often have felt like I bulk up when I do CrossFit, but I love the constant surprises in the gym. Orange Theory only might bore the poo out of me.”

That’s a hard one. Deciding on a gym is very hard. I’m very lucky that I still coach, so I have a free gym membership for CrossFit, and then just pay for my Orange Theory membership. Because that would be hard to choose, for sure. And the thing is, you have to do what works for your body type. So, I have been 30 pounds heavier when I’ve done CrossFit, and I’ve been 30 pounds lighter. So it really depends on first of all, my diet. And how heavy I’m pushing it in certain workouts.

So I think you have to do what’s best for your body. I can’t tell you that answer, honestly. And with how many times is too many times; I personally think everybody should get 2 days off a week. You’re not doing your active rest days, but you’re literally just letting your body repair. Maybe you walk the dogs. But let your body repair. All of us, especially in the fitness community, are like, if you’re not doing more of it it’s not worth doing. Bodies need to repair, and I’ve seen the best results when I have taken more rest days. So adding in; I used to not rest at all. I used to do, my active rest days were running 5 miles. And now I don’t do anything. And when I did that, my muscles started to change. They started to become more shapely. So I think 5 days is a good number, but everybody is different, as well. But that’s kind of what has worked for me.

But I can’t pick what gym is best for you. You have to choose. And you can always switch. If you go into Orange Theory, and you’re like; “Ok, I can’t just do this.” You can go back to CrossFit. And vice versa. So, that’s what I kind of think.

8. Getting better at running [1:02:33]

Ok. This one is from Carrie. “Do you have an advice on getting better mentally at running? I love Orange Theory because it forces me to face my fears about running, but I find myself getting nervous before workouts. Which I guess is a good thing in some ways.”

So, just so you know, I get nervous before every CrossFit workout. And I’ve done CrossFit for 7 years, and I still get nervous. And I think that’s a good thing. If you’re not getting nervous about how hard you’re going to work, you’re probably not working hard enough. So I think that fear is normal. And if you’re not letting that fear freeze you up, and you’re still going after it. Then f*ck yeah. Who cares about fears?

So, with running. For me, and I actually saw this. Somebody left a comment, and I was just listening to this podcast today. Joy and Claire on Girls Gone WOD, they talk about it in their podcast. Joy talks about how she heard somebody say that it’s a mental game. It’s a breathing game more than anything. And that’s what I think is most important. As soon as you let your breathing get all over the place, that’s when you can’t breathe and you think about how tired you are, and you’re just stumbling over everything. So if you can just concentrate on just your breathing. Instead of how your legs hurt, or anything else. If you can just concentrate;

I like to concentrate on breathing in through my nose, breathing out through my mouth. I do this rhythm with my run, how I breathe. And I breathe really loud, and I get comments about it all the time. I’m like, f*ck you, as I’m running by and they’re making fun of me. Peace. Deuces, b*tches! So, I think if you can concentrate on your breathing, that is so important and that will really help you kind of take it to the next edge. That’s not a saying. That’s not a saying at all. But, breathing is huge, for sure.

9. Orange Theory and injury [1:04:40]

Ok, let’s see. “An Orange Theory just opened near me.” Who is this? This is Mandy. Ok. “An Orange Theory just opened near me, but I worry about injury. I heard the classes are so packed and the trainers are not really able to monitor if you’re doing the exercises correctly. Also, that the trainers are not very experienced. What are your thoughts?”

Ok. So. Here’s the thing. That’s with any gym. You’re going to get that at all kinds of gyms, so you have to find the gym that works for you. I have been to; I went to this one gym that I’ve talked about I think on a podcast before. I didn’t say where it was, because I didn’t want to throw them under the bus. But they literally took us through the shittiest warmup I’ve ever f*cking done. Not even warm at all. We ran around the class, and did the worst stretches I’ve ever seen. And then she’s like, ok we’re going into 90% snatch. And this b*tch didn’t even know how to snatch herself. She did one movement; I was like, what the f*ck is that? That’s not a snatch. She did no progressions. And it’s in a place of mostly older people. And these people are f*cking snatching, not knowing what they’re doing, and the coach went into the other room and drank coffee with another coach. I wanted to slap her across the f*cking face.

But that happens at CrossFit gyms. That happens at all gyms. This Orange Theory gym I go to, I like all the coaches. I have seen some people get away with sh*tty movements. Where like a woman is not; most women, a lot of women, don’t do pushups correctly, and I think that should be addressed. Especially when you’re doing a certain amount that you could do on your knees and do properly, instead of staying on your toes and going down half an inch. That sh*t annoys me. So I see that stuff get ignored sometimes, depending on the coach. But you’re going to get that anywhere. And the coach may be doing other things, and just not see that for one second, the second you see it. And that person doesn’t get corrected, and you think that coach is a bad coach. So it’s easy to jump to conclusions for sure.

I know all the coaches that I’ve seen in Orange Theory, they all give recommendations for people who have injuries. They give them modifications. So they’re keeping an eye on those people, and helping them out, and giving them recommendations. But every gym is different. So you might go to one Orange Theory gym, or one CrossFit gym, and the coaching and the staff is amazing and it’s awesome. And you’ll go to another and it’s complete dog sh*t.

So I wouldn’t say they don’t have much experience. Because everywhere is different. And you know, they say that Orange Theory coaches don’t have to have much experience. And CrossFit is the same way. I’ve seen people who should not be coaching, coaching. So it’s the same way at every gym. No matter where you go. No matter if it’s CrossFit, Orange Theory, anything, you’re going to get that sort of thing. So just keep that in mind, that you have to find the right gym. And maybe that Orange Theory gym isn’t right next to you, because they don’t help.

The one thing that I don’t love that I’ve seen with Orange Theory is people have really poor rowing skills, and they don’t help out with that that much. And it’s ok to stop a person and be like; ok let’s go through this rowing a little bit more. And people have asked me before; they’re like, “How do you get so many splat points? How do you stay in the orange and red zone?” Or whatever.

And it’s honestly a lot because of the rowing. You’re using so much of your body. You’re using so much legs; and a lot of people just use their upper body, and rowing like a little rag doll. If you’re using your legs, you’re pumping a sh*t ton of blood through your body, and that’s what’s going to pump that heart rate faster. So I’m in that orange and red zone as soon as I hop on the rower, because I’m rowing correctly. I’m not, by any means, the best rower at all. But I can use the rower correctly, because I’ve learned how to row efficiently. So I wish they gave a little bit more tips with rowers. Because I think that would be helpful for people. And that’s kind of what I haven’t seen. But same thing; you’ll get that at CrossFit, as well.

10. Strength loss and weight gain [1:09:03]

Ok, this next one. This is an email I got from Kristen, and she asks, “Have you gained weight with Orange Theory or noticed that your strength has decreased?” I have not gained weight with Orange Theory. If my weight ever changes, it’s usually because my diet has changed and I’m probably eating too much sugar or maybe having more cocktails than I usually do. It’s usually food related. And no, I haven’t really seen my strength decrease. If any strength has decreased, it’s usually my back squat or front squat. I don’t have the strongest of those two squats. And especially if I’m not doing them very often in classes, then that strength has decreased. So that’s the only thing that’s really happened. But I haven’t gained any weight from Orange Theory from doing 2 classes a week. I don’t weigh myself, but I can see how clothes fit differently. And I think I’ve probably lost a little weight recently. But literally I could gain that all back next week. My body weight goes up and down every single week. I never know what’s going to happen with it. It just has a mind of its own.

11. Update on barre [1:10:15]

Ok. Here is another one. Let’s see. So, this is from Kristen. I wonder if this is different? No this is different. I don’t know. This one says, “A CrossFit gym just opened near me in Boston, and I’m curious so I might sign up for a free class. It looks similar to Barry’s bootcamp, and I actually disliked Barry’s bootcamp. Yet the Orange Theory website says it’s one of a kind. How is it different? Also, no more barre classes? You looked to be super into them a while back, and I was happy to see because I love barre, but then it seemed to stop. Did you get bored?”

Ok. So let’s start with CrossFit. I have never done Barry’s bootcamp, so I have no idea what Barry’s bootcamp looks like, so I could not tell you. I think it’s different probably because of the heart rate monitored fitness part of it. You can borrow a heart rate monitor; I just bought my own there, just so I could keep it every time and not have to put on someone’s slimy after workout strap. That’s f*cking gross. So I bought my own. But I don’t know. I think they do a good job with programming there. And you’re getting treadmill, and you’re getting rowing, and you’re getting body weight and workout weights. I think that’s why they claim they’re different. But you could get that same thing at a bootcamp style class, as well. I’ve just never done Barry’s bootcamp so I can’t really speak to that. But it’s definitely different for sure, from other things I’ve done.

And about the barre classes. My friend opened her studio, and it’s awesome, I love it. They’re amazing. It’s just across town, and parking, especially, they have a ton of construction going on over there. So parking is a little bit difficult. And for me, I literally need to go to the gym, I need to workout, and I need to get back home and get back to work since I run my own business. And money is time, time is money. So as soon as I’m wasting time, I’m wasting money. You know what I’m saying? Did I make that up by myself? Whatever.

So that barre class is just tough to get to. And for me, I get bored within that hour. I like to really hurt. I need to physically hurt in a workout. And that hurt is just different in barre. You know, you’re holding a position, and I can physically not hold certain positions. But I need that heart rate up, and I like keeping that heart rate up. So they added a class that is like a barre HIIT class, and I really like going to that one. But it’s only a certain couple of days a week, and I just can’t always make it. So that’s the only reason I don’t go to it. It’s across town, parking is pretty sh*tty right now with the construction going on. And they only have a certain amount of HIIT style classes. But I like the HIIT style. I need to breathe heavy, and I need to feel like I’m left with, not just “Oh my gosh my legs are jello.” But I need to feel like my lungs just went through something. That’s just what I like really. So, yeah. That’s for me. That’s what I like.

12. Orange Theory for beginners [1:13:32]

Ok, let’s see if there’s any other questions that I missed in the Instagram. In the Instagram stuff. Thanks so much for writing in questions. Ok this one is from Meg. She says, “What about Orange Theory for beginners or somebody just getting back into fitness. Is it too challenging? Supportive enough staff in a large class to assist newbies?” Oh, I think I accidentally missed that in another question.

I go to morning classes, so my classes are not overrun with a ton of people. But I’ve been in a class that every single spot is taken. And it is a little bit overwhelming sometimes. But you just have to be comfortable with yourself, and talk to the coach. If you’re a beginning, or you’re just getting back into fitness, and say, I might need a little bit more help today. Say it’s your first few classes. I might need a little more help and guidance. I’m just getting back into it and I’ll need some modifications. But they have bikes, they have ellipticals instead of the treadmill. And a lot of people do powerwalking, as well. So you could powerwalk. You could get on the bike. You could get on the elliptical. Whatever is best for you.

Just talk to the coach, and tell them, “Hey. I need a little bit more guidance. I’m just getting back into this.” But a lot of stuff you can do at your own pace, you know. Like, this is your workout. So say you’re supposed to be at a 3-minute push pace, and you can’t hold that push pace, well that’s ok. Then you just take it back down. Or you go to walking. You get to create your own workout with that, and that’s cool with Orange Theory. But I definitely don’t think it’s too hard for beginners or people just getting back into fitness. I think it’s great for all people.

13. Difference in CrossFit and Orange Theory [1:15:22]

Let’s see. I think there are a few more. This question; “What’s the major difference between CrossFit and Orange Theory?” So I kind of talked on those. CrossFit, you’re going to get much heavier weights. And to me, personally, I think CrossFit is more challenging depending on the workouts you’re getting. It is both mentally and physically draining. And you don’t always get that in Orange Theory. Super draining, Orange Theory is still super draining. But CrossFit is such a mental game. And that’s what sets CrossFit athletes apart from each other, is that mental game, is can you push through a little bit longer while keeping still beautiful form. That’s a hard one.

So yeah. I think that’s the biggest difference. I think CrossFit is a little bit more challenging because of that mental aspect depending on the workout, for sure. But they’re both still super hard and awesome.

14. Heart rate monitors [1:16:25]

Oh, yeah. “Do they have heart rate monitors there, or do you have to bring your own?” They have ones there that you can borrow. Some places make you pay to borrow, some places don’t. I just bought my own, because you can buy some there. And then you can bring your own as well, and they just adapt it to their system. They just put it on this little thing that adapts it to their system. So yeah. I think you can do that.

Ok. Let’s see if there are any other questions. I have to pee extremely bad. So, I just want to make sure I didn’t miss anything else. Julia. “I’ve been doing CrossFit for years, and have thought about trying Orange Theory. But actually really don’t know what it is? Can you explain it?” I guess I did explain it. Ok. I answered that question. Sorry, I’m really distracted because I’m about to pee my pants.

So {laughs} I hope… You guys hate me for saying that, huh? You’re like, gross Juli. I’m going to get those comments on iTunes that are like, “I did not need to know that she needed to use the restroom.” Ok, cool. When somebody’s like, “I didn’t need to know that you burped. Gross.” Oh, cool? Because I’ve heard many podcasters burp. So go suck a D. That was mean. It’s this acupuncture, guys. It’s really getting to me.

Ok, so that’s what I think about Orange Theory. I hope that answered some of your questions. I just got a lot of questions about it, so I wanted to have a podcast that could relay people to it. I think it’s awesome. Highly recommend it to people. Highly recommend CrossFit too. So I think you just have to find what you like more. Or you can do both, if you’re just rolling in dough. Do both. F*cking do it up.

So yeah. I hope that answered questions. I hope that helps. Sorry if I gave you any sort of negative energy, ok. I apologize. It’s Gloria’s fault. So go have an awesome weekend. Go have a fabulous 4th of July. Goddammit that it’s on a Tuesday. The worst. What are we going to do on a Tuesday? My husband works Saturday and Monday. I don’t know what we’re going to do on Tuesday. But we’ll figure it out. Hopefully be on the lake somewhere. If not, hopefully bake something. I don’t know why, but I just feel like baking.

So I hope you have a great day. I’ll talk to you soon. See you next week. Don’t forget to rate, review, subscribe. And be awesome the rest of your day. See you soon! Bye-bye!

Today on the podcast, I’m talking about my experience with adding Orange Theory workouts to my own workout routine and the changes I’ve seen! Plus I’m answering some of your questions about OTF! ____________ Aaptiv is a fitness app that gives you […] Today on the podcast, I’m talking about my experience with adding Orange Theory workouts to my own workout routine and the changes I’ve seen! Plus I’m answering some of your questions about OTF! ____________ Aaptiv is a fitness app that gives you […] PaleOMG Uncensored yes 1:19:11
Listener Questions – Episode 40: PaleOMG Uncensored Podcast Sat, 24 Jun 2017 12:16:05 +0000 8 Answering listener questions about diet, CrossFit vs Orange Theory, pet peeves, photography tips and all sorts of other questions! ____________ Aaptiv is a fitness app that gives you custom workouts with the voice of an elite trainer and an amazing playlist, walking you […] Answering listener questions about diet, CrossFit vs Orange Theory, pet peeves, photography tips and all sorts of other questions!


Aaptiv is a fitness app that gives you custom workouts with the voice of an elite trainer and an amazing playlist, walking you through the class or workout or training session! They have unlimited workouts such as race training, ab workouts, spinning, strength training, and even more! I’ve been using it for stretching workouts after my CrossFit or Orange Theory classes! To get motivated or simply just get to stretching this 2017, try Aaptiv out for FREE for 30 days using the promo code PALEOMG. Sign up here and try it out for 30 days now!

Support the podcast by clicking the Subscribe button on iTunes and please a review only if you love the podcast! There is enough negativity in this world, don’t spread more. I love hearing about what YOU want me to talk about so feel free to leave on comment here or on social media with topics you’d like me to cover! And don’t forget, some posts have affiliate links which I may be compensated from. This compensation helps with keeping this blog and up and running! Thank you so much for your support, you guys are amazing!


Episode 40 Transcription!

Today’s podcast is brought to you by Aaptiv. Aaptiv is the fitness app that brings together the voice of an elite trainer walking you through a workout step by step through that workout, with amazing music in the background. So, these workouts, since they’re just on your phone, on an app, you can do them anywhere. You can do them while traveling. You can do them in your basement. You can do then in your garage, or in the other room while your baby is sleeping. You can literally do these workouts anywhere, and they make it pretty cool. I actually saw a woman last week doing her workout; she didn’t have weights, so she used candles. Those gigantic candles. Pretty awesome. So you can do these workouts anywhere.

And just last week, I announced my partnership with Aaptiv, doing the Aaptiv and PaleOMG Get Strong Challenge. It was seven days with seven workouts and seven PaleOMG recipes; one recipe that is never before seen. It’s a fajita chicken salad, served cold. It’s so good. You have to make it. It’s so bomb. So, right now you can get into that challenge. Say you missed last week; not to worry. You still have time to get this workout done. All you have to do is go to and use the promo code PaleOMG and then you not only get 30 days for free with Aaptiv, but you can also just go down to curated play lists at the bottom of the Aaptiv app, and pick PaleOMG. Boom. The challenge is right there. So you can start on Wednesday. You can start today. You can start tomorrow. You can start next month. But it’s seven days, and it is going to get you feeling better, sweating your ass off, and getting fitter than you were yesterday. Is fitter a word? I really have no idea. But go try it out. Go to Use the promo code PaleOMG, and get fit with the Gets Strong Challenge.

1. What’s happened this week [3:13]
2. Bachelorette recap [10:12]
3. Friends who don’t understand your job [21:52]
4. Beauty procedures you didn’t love [24:57]
5. Plans to lose weight for the wedding [26:43]
6. Growing your hair out [29:09]
7. CrossFit and your period [29:57]
8. Question about acupuncture [31:42]
9. Frozen versus fresh veggies [32.04]
10. Snacking [33:02]
11. CrossFit and breast implants [35:39]
12. Post workout skincare routine [35:51]
13. Change in eating for CrossFit competition [36:47]
14. Bodybuilding competitions [38:04]
15. Burnout on posting [44:01]
16. Quality versus quantity [44:53]
17. Adjusting needs during monthly time [47:03]
18. Being comfortable in your skin [48:07]
19. Balancing cardio with weights [50:49]
20. Picking a cocktail [51:27]
21. Stopping the self sabotage [52:39]
22. Staying on plan while sharing a home [55:19]
23. Calorie counting [56:29]
24. Guilt over a cheat meal [56:36]
25. How frequently do you treat yourself [58:22]
26. Making up new recipes [1:00:37]
27. Working with an esthetician [1:01:55]
28. Do you miss competing in CrossFit [1:04:44]
29. White rice versus brown [1:08:00]
30. Photography tips [1:09:14]
31. Hair washing [1:12:44]
32. Eating at sporting events [1:13:14]
33. All the guys you’ve dated [1:14:22]
34. Back on track with eating [1:15:51]
35. Redoing old recipes [1:17:05]
36. Putting yourself out there on social media [1:18:15]
37. Saving money and investing [1:20:42]
38. Sticking to paleo [1:23:33]
39. Pet peeves [1:26:32]
40. Choosing CrossFit or Orange Theory [1:28:26]
41. What changed after no longer competing [1:29:40]
42. Fitness centered blog [1:30:51]
43. Repurposing outfits [1:32:26]
44. Juli Reality TV [1:34:27]

This is Juli Bauer from PaleOMG and you are listening to PaleOMG Uncensored.

Juli Bauer: Well hello there, guys. This is kind of weird because I’m recording this on my phone. Because the system that I record my podcast on is acting like a real dick today. So I just feel kind of weird. Just on my phone here. Recording a voice memo. But hey, what are you going to do. What are you going to do? I hope everyone is having a wonderful day, and hopefully it’s raining where you are. Because the rain has been very welcome here in Colorado. It’s been so hot. and now my dog can run around without having a heat stroke. And that’s always a positive, you know. He’s sitting on my lap right now, so I have to have my computer off to the side, and almost falling onto the floor. He’s so thoughtful, so caring.

1. What’s happened this week [3:13]

Let’s talk about what’s happened this week. I don’t think anything has happened. We put a deposit down for our landscaping. Finally figured all that bullsh*t out, because landscaping is the worst. We painted our house, so our house is nice and painted. It is a dark gray, and as the woman down the street who is about four billion years old told me, it sticks out like a sore thumb. So obviously she’s a fan. All the houses on our block are like 1950s houses, with this ugly, most of them are ugly brick. There’s a lot that are like nice brick, like nice color. The red brick that’s just classic. But most are an ugly orangish-red brick, including that old hags house. So, we didn’t want to be like that. We wanted to be a little bit more modern, because inside our house is very modern. And we wanted to be a little bit more updated. So we went with the painting. Obviously, some people, meaning only her not a fan of it. Because everyone else in the neighborhood has loved it. Including the people who are next door to us, who are amazing women. And random people have let me know that they love it as they’ve walked by. So I can’t wait for us to get landscaping done and for us to crush her spirit. That’s a little bit harsh. But I want to say, “Hey. We know what we’re doing. And we don’t want to look old as f*ck, like you.”

Ok. This is what else has been happening. This is probably why my anger levels are at an all-time high. So, and this is a question I got. When I asked people to leave questions, I got a couple of questions about acupuncture, because I’ve been putting it on my social media, when I’ve been getting acupuncture. My husband was getting really bad migraines, and so he went to the person who does acupuncture and kind of physical therapy type staff with the people from our gym. So he had amazing results. His migraines have almost been completely gone. And I was getting really sore traps to the point that it was causing headaches. And I don’t ever, ever get headaches. Like, if I get a headache, it’s very, very strange. And so, when my traps were so tight, I couldn’t really do anything about it. I was like, finally, f*ck it. I need to take care of myself. I’m going to go and do acupuncture.

And I hate acupuncture. My first experience with acupuncture, it was the worst. I cried afterwards. Like, it gave me so much anxiety that I cried. And I’m not like a person who’s not a fan of needles. I don’t care. Draw my blood, I can watch the blood come out, I can watch the needle go in. It doesn’t bother me. But when you’re sticking needles in me, that’s not very comfortable, oh hi dog. If you’re sticking needles in me, and just letting me sit with my thoughts for 20 minutes, I’m not f*cking into it. I can sit with my thoughts and get work done. That’s what I think. And I get it. I need to meditate. But all I can think about is how I need to do stuff. My poor dad was telling me about meditation, and how he’s meditated, and whenever your brain wants to go somewhere, you just stay there. You just stay in that meditation state. And I’m just thinking the whole time, like, I could be getting so much f*cking work done during that state.

So, anyways, I did acupuncture yesterday, or two days ago when you’re listening to this. And he did dry needling, and he did dry needling in my traps, and in my throat, like the muscles in my throat; and I don’t know about you, but who likes f*cking needles in their throat. And if you do, you’re probably into some crazy S&M sh*t, and that’s your own business. But me, personally, no. So I’m like sitting there. I’m just trying to take it in. I’m trying to be okay with it, be comfortable with it, and I’m not. I’m super sore today. And I think acupuncture is supposed to release energy. And I feel like it’s released some sh*tty f*cking energy. Because I’m a real b*tch. Can’t help it. It’s just who I am.

So, yeah, that’s why I’m doing acupuncture. To help with my tight traps and stretch out my chest. Because I don’t know if you look at CrossFitters. Maybe you’re a Crossfitter yourself. Look in the mirror. Your shoulders are f*cking rounded as sh*t. Whenever I look at these competition, it’s these women with these round shoulders. Nobody stands up straight, because their chest muscles are so tight, it’s pulling their shoulders forward. The chest muscles are much bigger than the small muscles around your scapula. So, yeah. I don’t want to look like that, and I don’t want to be an old person who’s just getting that hunchback. So, working on it.

Someone asked if it was for beauty reasons. No. Well, I guess so. I don’t want to be an old round person. So I guess it is long-term beauty. But this guy does deep tissue massage, and it’s super f*cked up. And I’m just yelling cuss words the whole time. Whatever. It’s supposed to help; it should help. This is my third time. I’m trying to keep an open mind about it. So far, I f*cking hate it. But hey. My husband goes there, and he’s like, oh, I just sit there with needles in me and almost sleep for 30 minutes. I’m like, what the f*ck. I literally; I left and I got off the bed and the bed was a pool of sweat. Because it’s like so much anxiety the entire hour. A pool of sweat. And I’m not joking. Like I could see the line, like I had pissed the bed up to my neck.

So yeah. That’s what’s been going down in this place. Some acupuncture. Some old had on our street. House painting. And landscaping, which starts next week, and I’m so pumped for. I cannot wait to be the house that is not ugly. According to me. Obviously, not that one woman.

2. Bachelorette recap [10:12]

Ok. So let’s; we’ve got to get to this. We can’t f*ck around here. Because I want to do a recap of this week’s Bachelorette, and then we’ve got to go into questions, and there are like a million questions. And I’m telling you now, as I yawn, that I’m going to yawn a million times. You talk to yourself for an hour to an hour and a half without yawning. Because you’re talking nonstop. Try it. Do it. Ok. Let’s talk about the Bachelorette.

So, this Bachelorette episode, thank god that we’re back on, because last week some f*cking basketball game was on. How is basketball still on. Is it played 24/7, 365 days a year? Because that’s what it seems like. That’s what it’s like. It’s on all the time. It drives me f*cking crazy. Not that I hate basketball; I hate all sports, ok. But it seriously never ends. We did March madness. I understand that’s college, but shouldn’t it all just be then and done? Eh? Eh?

Okay, so the episode wasn’t on. It skipped last week, and whenever episode was supposed to air, that was during the midst of the Bachelor in Paradise shenanigans. I mean, there’s all this he-said she-said lawsuit. I think it’s all cleared up now. But pretty much, Corrin got super wasted, DeMario got super wasted, and then they were pretty much just naked out at the pool and doing everything but sex. So you just can visualize that on your own, ok. So doing all that with cameras around. And who knows, I don’t even know if I’m telling the truth. But these are the things that I read. That a producer was like, we should stop this, and another producer was like, no keep going. And that producer sued ABC, and then Corrin was suing ABC. And then, whenever, a lawsuit team, looked into it and said there was no was drunk people doing drunk sh*t. We’ve all been there, unless you don’t drink. I’ve done some dumb shit in my day, and I had nobody to sue over it, you know. You’ve just got to f*cking swallow your pride, and say maybe I shouldn’t drink anymore. So, that’s just an idea. Just an idea. I can’t hold my alcohol, so I don’t really do it.

Ok. But this week on the Bachelorette. Oh, and I think Bachelor in Paradise is about to start filming again. Thank god, because it was like suspended. And if I didn’t have that to watch in August, I don’t know what the f*ck I would do with my life. Oh, except you know what? I’m going on a boating trip. Through St. Martin, St, Vincent, all these other saints that I’ve never heard of in the islands. And, yeah. I just bought two new swimsuits today. That’s what I’m doing in august, along with watching Bachelor in Paradise.

Ok, so back this week on the Bachelorette. Just so we know, we found out that Lee, who is still on the show, who has the tallest hair of all. He has a pompadour that is 4 feet tall, and he’s about 3 1/2 feet tall. So his pompadour is more than his body. It’s ridiculous. It’s just so weird. So it’s been out all over social media that he’s a racist. He has all these racist tweets. It’s very strange. And he always calls Rachel, who he’s trying to bang at this point, he always calls Rachel ma’am. If my husband said, “Yes ma’am” to me, I would say we’re never having sex again. Do not call me ma’am. I’m not your f*cking elder.

So, Lee sucks. He’s a racist. He loves making men angry. He talks to Rachel, and talks about how his grandma died from cancer. And its like one of those conversations, at least how the producers spun it, is he brings it up out of nowhere. He’s like, “My grandma died from cancer. You want to make out?” Like, that’s pretty much what it is. It’s like, hey. Stop using your family’s death to wiggle your way into another rose ceremony. He clicks his tongue a lot on the episode. And I don’t care what else. He’s a racist, I hate him. I hope he dies. No, that was so mean. Oh my god. I did not mean to say that. I’m just; it’s just the acupuncture energy, ok. I don’t hope he dies, but I hope he gets kicked off the show and someone poops on his head.

Ok, so let’s see. So Diggy, the guy who looks like a Ken doll, and then the guy who has the biggest jaw of all time. They all get kicked off. And the two best parts of the entire episode, which are very small parts. Is Brady, who is Ken doll. He is combing his hair with a tiny finger. It’s one of those; imagine a tiny finger that fits on top of one of your fingers, and he’s using it as a comb. That was my favorite part. And then, the Russian guy who ponytails his hair a lot. He tries to manbun, but he’s not quite there. He has a zebra print purple jacket on. And Rachel kept him. F*cking get your life together.

Ok. So, after the rose ceremony, they call go to Hilton Head. Which I want to go so badly. Hilton Head is high on the list of places to visit. So I’d like to go there soon. Dean gets the first date. Dean looks like he’s 14 and he should be in a boy band. But like the cool on in the boy band. Not like the; I don’t know any boy band names anymore. But not like the one who gets around. And writes; I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m trying to say. But Dean has very white teeth, and I really love that about him because my husband has the whitest teeth ever, and has this big smile, and that’s why I fell in love with him. Among other reasons. But his teeth are what moved me towards him. I literally remember the first time he came into the gym, and somebody was talking about how hot he was. And at that point, I just didn’t think of him like that, because I was coaching him. And I was like, yeah, he has really nice, white teeth. That’s what I thought.

So that’s what I notice about Dean. He has great teeth. He’s 2 years old. So they go on a blimp date. They go up in a blimp. And Dean is so scared. He literally shits his pants. You can see the fear on his face. It’s not like fake fear, or like, “I don’t really like this.” It’s like, I sh*t my pants and I don’t have an extra pair of pants; what am I going to do, producers. What? It’s so great. So the date; whatever. They go up in a blimp, and Dean’s like, “I can do this. I’m not going to die.” And then they go, I don’t know, to some concert like they always do. And they’re on a stage in the middle in front of everyone who is recording them, and they’re dancing with some guy. Does anybody know this artist? He’s a great singer, but who the f*ck is this guy? And then they’re dancing and making out. It’s like, ok. Everyone is recording you and you’re making out. I rarely even hold my husband’s hand in public. Not that I don’t like to, but I’m sure as f*ck not making out in front of everybody. It grosses me out when people do that. It’s like, you don’t have a house? I guess if you’re 14 it’s ok because you’re desperate.

Ok. Then they have a group date, and they’re on a boat. And I think it’s called the vagabond, but it looks like Vagi-bond. Vag. The vag boat. So I don’t know. They just dance on this boat, and they’re drinking, and the guys are taking their shirts off. And this Josiah guy, who I think is a lawyer. He takes his shirt off, and he’s like, “I’m the best looking man here.” And he’s flexing his boobs. I just hate when dudes flex their boobs. It’s like, ok we get it. You have muscle. I can flex my boobs too, and I’m not doing it. Honestly, I could flex them better than Josiah did. So, jokes on you.

So they have this little boat time. And I don’t know, they’re doing the limbo. Weird sh*t. And then they have to go do a spelling bee. Which is f*cking hilarious. And honestly, I give these guys credit. Doing a spelling bee in front of everybody who is judging you, and you just, fade out. You have no idea how to spell something. It’s so hard. I get it. And you can f*ck up easily. One guy f*cked up champagne, because he just switched the G and the N. Not a big deal, you know. You are saying it out loud, and it’s hard to picture it in your head. When all these people are watching you. And you’re probably pissing sweat. All these guys sweat so much.

So the one that I thought was so funny was Eric, who has the worst voice ever. He sounds like; I don’t know. He sounds really annoying. But he had to spell façade, and he spelled it P-H-Y-S-D-E. {laughs} Physede. Physed a. Physede. Physd. That’s how he spelled it. It was great. But then there was like Josiah got the word stunning. Ok, who the f*ck can’t spell stunning? My dog can spell stunning. And then the other guys got boutonniere, and polyamorous. I’ve never said that word. I don’t even know what that word means. And Josiah got stunning. So stupid.

And then; oh, then nothing really else happens. They have their, I think they’re into. I don’t know what’s happening at this point. I think they’re just hanging out after the group date. And my favorite, what’s his face, What’s his name? Oh, Peter. Peter talks about how he lives in Wisconsin. And she’s like, “Yeah, I’d move to Wisconsin.” Ok, Rachel. Get your ass out of the grass. I couldn’t really think of anything there. But, ok. No offense to people who live in Wisconsin. I’m not hating on you. But why the f*ck would you ever move to Wisconsin if you don’t already live there? Or you’re like, 80 years old, and you’re like, yeah let’s retire in Wisconsin. You live in Dallas, Rachel. I had the best cupcake of my life in Dallas. The best cupcake. And extremely good cocktails. Just saying. No thank you.

And just so you know, Peter, it came out that one of his goals in his yearbook. You know, when you’re like, what do you want to do when you grow up, of your high school yearbook bullsh*t. His said his goal was to be on the Bachelor. Funny how that played out, am I right? Am I right. Ok. So that’s what happened. The show ended with Lee being more racist. Quite boring. Lee, you bore all of us, and your hair is stupid. Ok, I know I’m being really mean to him, but it’s because he’s a racist. So that’s why.

3. Friends who don’t understand your job [21:52]

Ok. Let’s grab a sip of water. Take a deep breath in so I don’t yawn. Just so you know, if you don’t yawn when another person yawns, it means you’re a serial killer. Or a psycho. Just so you know.

So, ok. Let’s see. I asked questions on Instagram the other day. I like to do these episodes like every 5 or so episodes, a listener question episode. And I had a ton of fun questions. I have like 4 pages. So better get going.

Ok. Let’s just start. I hope people don’t mind when I say their name. Sometimes I might not say their name because it’s just too much to pronounce, and I can’t spell like the guys on the spelling bee. Ok, Lemon and Fig. “How do you deal with friends who don’t get what you do? I feel like I have the greatest support network through other bloggers and Instagrammers, but I have a hard time feeling understood by those in my real life community. Do you ever run into this? How do you deal with it?”

Yes. I run into it every single time that it’s not a friend. I think most people think that my husband makes all the money, and I just have this little go-to job. Just like fun job on the side that doesn’t make much money. And I make more money than he does with my job. And I wish I could say that to them, and smack them in the face. But, at the end of the day it doesn’t matter. If they don’t think that I have a real job, and I’m over here making a life for my family, and making money that I can save and put away for retirement, and pay for landscaping. {laughs} Whatever, it doesn’t matter at the end of the day. But I do over that with my husband sometimes. I’m like, I wish people took my job seriously. And he’s like, who cares? You’re like that dark horse. People don’t know that you’re doing well. And I’m not; yeah. Yeah. So I guess I just don’t give a sh*t. {laughs}

And my friends know it’s a serious business. But I’m sure a lot of my friends don’t think it’s a serious business as well, but they just don’t say that. But nobody knows. Your income, your security, your happiness, your day to day. So who cares what they think at the end of the day? I still don’t think my parents totally understand. I think my dad tries to understand. But I think when they’re like, “You don’t have benefits?!” Because that’s always been so important. My mom was always like, “You need to find a job with benefits.” And you know, at the end of the day, I have to purchase my own health insurance that I never, ever, ever f*cking use.

It’s crazy with health insurance. It’s like, you almost hope something bad happens so the health insurance is worth paying for. Isn’t that terrible? I don’t actually wish that. But health insurance is such bullsh*t. Whole nother topic, am I right? {laughs}

4. Beauty procedures you didn’t love [24:57]

Ok, this next one. C-Caps. “I love hearing about all your favorite beauty products and procedures. But is there anything you would not do again, or that wasn’t worth it? How does your spray tan never look fake and orange?”

What would I not do? I think I’ve liked everything I’ve done. The only thing that I didn’t love. Well, I just wasn’t like, “Oh my god, this is the best thing ever.” Is permanent eyeliner. Just because it’s not super obvious. But you don’t want it too obvious that you have fake liner on all the time. So it’s just kind of one of those things that if you don’t wear makeup ever, then it’s worth it. But if you’re wearing makeup like I do, then you kind of cover it up. So what’s the point of it. But it still I think an awesome thing to just make your eyes pop a little bit more. It’s just not; it hasn’t been my favorite. Like microblading my eyebrows; that was by far my favorite, and worth it. Totally awesome. Yeah.

And for the spray tan, I go to a place called Glamour Bar here in Denver, and she spray tans it on you. And you’re not in a booth or anything, so it’s super even. And the products she uses are just high quality products. So I guess that’s how I don’t get orange, and that weird color. Because her colors are awesome. I’m pretty sure she uses St. Tropez. I’m not positive, but I think that’s what she sprays on. And then when I use my own tanner at home, I use St. Tropez, as well. And I don’t think it gives you that orange color.

5. Plans to lose weight for the wedding [26:43]

Next question. Maria. “My wedding is a month away, and I totally dropped the ball getting into shape and toning up. What would you recommend to drop some pounds and tone up as much as possible during the last month? I know progress doesn’t happen that quickly, but looking for some things to add in my routine and get motivated in going this month.”

Ok. So here’s the thing, Maria. Losing weight takes a good amount of time. Losing weight and toning up; my body has been changing for the past 7 years. So, I don’t think there’s one thing you can do to just drop a bunch of pounds. Because for me, I lost 30 pounds in 3 years. It wasn’t just a quick fix. And I don’t think anybody should use quick fixes. I think they are detrimental to your long-term health. And I know everybody wants to feel and look their best on their wedding day, and I get it.

But the only thing I can recommend is just eat healthy. Stay away from sugar. Stay away from alcohol. Eat healthy, and continue with an exercise plan. Don’t do anything drastic. It’s not good for your body long-term. And I see so many women who, before their wedding, they starve themselves. They do excessive exercise. And they get super skinny for their wedding, and then they blow up afterwards, and they gain a bunch of weight back. And nobody wants to do that.

At the same time, I don’t want to look back at my wedding pictures and be like, “I wish I still looked like that. I’ll never look like that again.” Because I was emaciated. I didn’t want that. So the only thing that I really changed; I had been working out, when my wedding day came, I had been working out continuously for the past 6 years, and been eating healthy for 6 years. The only thing I changed for the last month leading up was I tried to stay away from sugar, I didn’t drink, and I just ate a little bit more chicken and white fish and salmon. We didn’t do as much steak and higher fat meats. And that was it. Because my husband was eating a ton of chicken breasts. And I couldn’t do it as much. But that was the only thing I changed. I just tried to eat a little bit healthier and stay away from sugar and alcohol. But don’t do anything drastic. Just don’t do it, because you will regret it long-term in life. Yeah. That’s the advice I got.

6. Growing your hair out [29:09]

Kim Harris. “Desperate for my hair to grow. Any tips for getting longer, healthier locks?” One, eat healthy. Two, drink a lot of water. Three, add collagen to your diet. I added collagen a few months ago, and my hair has been growing like crazy. And my hair was literally always the same length. Never grew. And now it is growing so fast. I have to get my nails redone so much quicker, which kind of sucks. But my hair is growing like crazy. So get some collagen in your diet. I love Great Lakes, and I love Vital Proteins. Those are my two favorite collagens. So get some collagen in your diet. But eating healthy helps too.

7. CrossFit and your period [29:57]

Ok, Jabahan. I don’t know about that name. “Juli; back when you were competing in CrossFit, did you ever have any issues with losing your period?” I get this question a lot. “If so, how long until after competing did it take for your body and hormones to return to normal? I know you’re not a doctor. I’ve been struggling with my cycle after I started lifting.”

Ok, so when I first started CrossFit. This was like 7 years ago. I dropped weight really quickly, because I changed my diet and I changed my exercise routine. So I lost 30 pounds extremely fast. I mean, I think it was extremely fast. It was like 9 months, I dropped 30 pounds. And I lost my period. It just went away. I wasn’t worried about it, because I was like 21, and I don’t know. I just wasn’t worried about it because I was 21. But, it came back once I gained weight. So I haven’t had issues. I went off my birth control a couple of months ago just to get off of hormonal birth control. And I haven’t had any issues. So I think it’s something you need to talk to your doctor about. Because I don’t have much advice, other than the weight gain helped me gain that period back.

But I know a ton of women in the athletic field who have lost their period. And some worry about it, and some don’t. Obviously, it depends when you’re trying to have a baby, you definitely want that. But I would talk to your doctor, because I don’t have much advice on that. Because I haven’t really dealt with that a ton.

8. Question about acupuncture [31:42]

Ok. Fertz. “I don’t think I’ve seen or heard the answer to this. But just;” Oh, I actually answered. This is a question about the acupuncture. So sorry I meant to delete that one. But yeah, just doing acupuncture to help with headaches and release some of the tension and tightness in my shoulders and chest. Ick.

9. Frozen versus fresh veggies [32.04]

Bronwyn. Bronwyn, you’re my friend. Hi Bronwyn. She asks, “Frozen veggies versus fresh veggies.” So I always go for fresh, in-season vegetables first, but I like to keep frozen vegetables in my freezer for crazy nights. So the other night, I made kind of like a stir fry. And it was just stir fry veggies and then cauliflower rice. And the frozen veggies, they’re picked fresh and then they’re frozen. So they’re still high quality. And you can get organic ones as well. I just like having those fast ones that I can just cook up in a pan when they’re frozen, like stir fry veggies, and cauliflower rice. Or green beans, even. I keep those in the freezer so when I’ve run out at the end of the week have something ready to go for dinner. So I like both. I just like to keep both on hand.

10. Snacking [33:02]

Ok, this one says, “What is your take on snacking? I think you’ve talked about this a little bit before. I’ve been hearing from other paleo enthusiasts say that you should only eat three square meals a day and that snacking messes up your blood sugar levels. My whole life I’ve been a snacker.”

Ok, so I think it’s important to remember that meals should be big enough that they hold you over longer than they would on a normal American Standard Diet. So if you’re eating breakfast in the morning, and you’re eating the Standard American Diet of a bowl of f*cking Cheerios, and a bowl of fruit on the side, and milk, you’re going to be hungry really f*cking fast. Because you’re spiking your blood sugar, and then you’re coming down in a crash and then you feel that hunger. But if you’re eating breakfast of lots of vegetables. You’re adding in good protein; good quality protein. And then a little bit of fat in there, you’re going to be held over much longer than you would versus that all sugar breakfast.

So, this also depends on your activity level. So if you’re working out on a regular basis, maybe you’re going to get hungrier than a person who is completely sedentary at their desk all day every day. I know that my mom and I eat very different meals, because I’m half her age, and I exercise daily. And my needs are different. So I’ll have a snack when maybe she’s not hungry at all, and we’ll have different sized meals. So I think it’s important to remember that you should be getting great quality food at your meals, and a good amount of food. Eat more than what we’ve been taught to eat. So eating a sh*t ton of vegetables, good protein, some good fat in there, and you should be held over.

I think it’s a little bit harder when you’re doing your lunch to dinner. A lot of people get hungry in there, including me. So I don’t think it’s bad to have a snack. I just don’t think you should be snacking on high sugary things or protein bars. Just heavy sugary carbohydrates, because that’s just going to lead to more snacking. I think we should be getting more of that greens, vegetables, and a good protein as a snack in just a smaller amount than you would have in your meal. So that’s kind of how I see snacking.

11. CrossFit and breast implants [35:39]

Paleoish Dub. “Can you do CrossFit with breast implants under the muscle?” Yes. I have breast implants under the muscle. I’ve been doing CrossFit for 7 years. Boom.

12. Post workout skincare routine [35:51]

Melanie. “What is your post-workout skin care routine?” Well, Melanie. I have absolutely no post workout skin care routine. I worked out at 9 this morning, and then I went to the mall, and then I went grocery shopping, and then I went to the dog store, and I walked the dog. And now I’m back at home recording this podcast, and I have done nothing for my face. And I can feel the salt on my forehead. So not the best person to ask for this.

If I was a normal human being who worked out and then had to go to work, I would just wash my face and then put on the normal products that I use on my face. But that doesn’t usually happen. I go straight to doing other stuff after I workout. So I don’t have any routine. But wash your face. Don’t be gross like me.

13. Change in eating for CrossFit competition [36:47]

Sunny Windy. “I’ve read your post on all the different transformations your body has done. And I’m wondering how you would eat differently if you decided you wanted to go back into competing? I’m asking because I’ve lost weight and lost all my PRs and wanted to bulk up a little more without gaining fat.”

If I wanted to go back into competing in CrossFit, I would just eat more. I would probably eat more carbohydrates than I do now, and I feel like I eat a decent amount of carbohydrates now. But if I was competing, I would eat more carbohydrates, and I would make sure I would get a small meal in after my workout. And I didn’t really do that much. I tried sometimes, but I just wasn’t good and consistent with it, because I didn’t feel hungry after a meal. But I would force myself.

Now, I don’t need food. I don’t need protein, I don’t need a shake. I don’t need anything right after a workout, because I’m normally going to go eat lunch, or breakfast, or dinner, so I’m not needing that. But if I was competing and working out multiple times a day and trying to hit weights, I would make sure I got food in to help me recover. So that’s what I’d do differently. I’d get more food, and I would get more carbohydrates.

14. Bodybuilding competitions [38:04]

Stacia. “What are your thoughts about bodybuilding competitions? I had a really bad binge cycle relapse from one. Listening to your podcast about portion control and intuitive eating has helped me. That’s exactly how I want to live. Not on a meal plan, eating the same thing every day, using a scale. But truly listening to my body and building muscle at the same time.”

So, to each their own. I have a coach at my gym who is competing in a figure competition soon, and she’s trying to get her pro card. And she is really, really good at cutting back and being very strict and regulating what she’s eating and what she’s drinking. And she gets f*cking shredded. It’s crazy, every week I see her on a Wednesday, and her body has transformed from the week before. Because her competition is here in July. And she loves to do it. And she wants to get her pro card. And that’s her goal.

After she finishes, she goes back to normal life. And she blows up, just gains weight like a normal person, and she looks like a normal human being. But compared to what her figure competition self looks like, it looks like she’s a completely different person. And she seems like she deals with it very well. Me? No f*cking way. I would not deal with that well. I would not be ok with it. And I don’t think it is healthy for the body to be very restrictive, and then binge. And be very restrictive, and then binge. Sure, your body maybe can bounce back from it. But I think you’re going to suffer those effects later on in life. Both physically and mentally. So I don’t think they’re healthy long-term for people. And you know, you see all these competitions.

Actually, you guys should go listen to the podcast, Girls Gone WOD, that just came out this week with Cherie Chan. It’s like 200-something episode with Cherie Chan, who her husband is Matt Chan. He’s a competitive CrossFit athlete. A lot of people know that name, which is why I say that. But they had a great; she talked about this, and I think it was just a great episode to listen to. But I see these women in competitions; even men. Super restrictive. I mean, you can’t drink water the day of your competition. And then after their competition, they’re like; “Look what I earned!” And it’s like a whole packet of Oreos. And they’re like, “I’m so excited I earned this. Can’t wait to eat this.” And then you binge on f*cking Oreos. Ok, that is so bad for your body.

And we see, Joy and Claire talk about how food should not be a transactional thing. You should not be working out so you can have all these cocktails over the weekend. Or you’re working out to burn off the regrets you have the night before. Food should not be looked at that way, and we are taught through social media that that’s the norm. And you know, I’ve written posts where I’m like, going to work off. Say I was at the Aspen food and wine classic this past weekend. And you know, you’re eating and drinking a lot. And I did a soul cycle class. And I almost wrote, “Earning my food for the weekend,” or something like that. And I’m like, no I’m not! I’m working out to take care of my body. And I’m going to eat what I want to eat because I decided I want to eat it. There’s no hatred towards myself for eating something. And if I was going to hate myself, why would I eat that?

So there’s just this negative relationship with food that we’re taught that it’s ok. And it should not be like that. And I wish more women and men would f*cking wrap their heads around that. Like, people are always like, “Well why don’t you eat that?” And I’m like, ok that makes me feels sh*tty, and I’ll regret eating that, so I don’t eat it. And because I don’t want to have that negative relationship with food.

Another thing, like wine. I had wine over the weekend. I’m not like a huge wine person, but there was really high quality, amazing wines at this food festival. And I’m not thinking how I’m going to work out so hard to burn this off, because I’m enjoying the moment. I’m enjoying my life. I’m enjoying those times that I will never get back. Who knows if I’ll ever have the opportunity to go to the Food and Wine Classic again. I’m living my life. And there’s no negative viewpoints on it.

So I don’t love body building competitions, because what many people have made it. I’m sure there are some people in that fitness arena who don’t have issues with food. Maybe. But from the majority of what I see in my own personal life and what I see online is it creates a really negative relationship with food that’s very hard to break after you get out of the competing world. So I’m not a huge fan of it. I’ve seen friends go through it, and it just looks f*cking miserable. So that’s kind of how I see it. To each their own, though. No judging, I couldn’t personally do it with my own issues I had with food before. So I hope that helps, Stacia. And I think that’s how your say your name. I don’t know.

15. Burnout on posting [44:01]

Ok. Beck Lance. “Do you ever get tired of posting and being constantly connected?” Yes. It’s hard to post multiple times a day, and just come up with content for social media. But that’s the business, at the end of the day. And it sucks being constantly on my phone. And I try not to do it in certain situations. I don’t want to be that person who’s doing selfie videos when she’s with a group of friends. Or at a concert. Or just, you know. I try to take more pictures if I’m at an event. But at the end of the day, that’s my business and that’s how I keep my business going, is being on social media. So yes, I get sick of it every day. But don’t we all with our jobs, with some part of our job? And it doesn’t feel like a job so I have nothing to complain about.

16. Quality versus quantity [44:53]

Em Hall. “I’m overweight and seriously want to make a change. I’m 35 with two kids, and I don’t want this to be something holding me back when I’m 40. I know the secret to weight loss is my diet and exercise, but should I focus on more the quality of my foods; i.e., eating much cleaner, or counting calories and staying under the goal number?”

I highly recommend just concentrating on the quality. Don’t think about quantity. Don’t obsess about a number. Hit quality food. If you are eating high quality food, if you’re eating a sh*t ton of vegetables, green vegetables, and you’re eating good quality protein, you’re going to lose weight. That’s it at the end of the day. If you’re drinking on a regular basis. If you’re eating sugar or high carbohydrate foods, and maybe you don’t exercise much, that’s really needed in a person who doesn’t exercise much. If you’re sticking to those, staying away from. Sorry, I’m skipping over my words.

If you’re concentrating on staying away from sugar and alcohol, and those heavier carbohydrates if you’re not exercising much, and just incorporating good fats into your diet. Good vegetables, green vegetables, and high quality meat, you will lose weight. So concentrate on quality. Stop thinking about a quantity. Stop thinking about a goal number. And don’t even think about exactly how much weight you need to lose. Just concentrate on eating well, and showing your children how to eat well, as well. I think if more people could teach their children how to eat healthier, the world would really change moving forward. And as I travel around the country, we’re really losing that, and don’t know how to fix that. It starts with the parents. Because those parents are going to teach them those habits. So think about quality, for sure.

17. Adjusting needs during monthly time [47:03]

Mad Smith. I’ve got to take a sip of water. Hold on. Ok. “You’ve given great insight on how to listen to your body when it comes to living a healthy lifestyle. So I’m wondering, how do you adjust your diet and exercise routine during your time of the month?” Let’s see. “I feel like my body during that time can often have a more distorted list of needs than a typical day.”

So when I’m on my period, I usually up my carbohydrates, and I have a little bit more sugar. I have some dark chocolate. Yeah, I just eat a little bit more. And that’s it. I move on with my day. But yeah, I think more carbohydrates. My friend Cassy from Fed and Fit, when I was having some hormonal imbalance because of getting off birth control. She was like, I recommend upping your carbohydrates and that might help. And it totally did. So, up those carbs.

18. Being comfortable in your skin [48:07]

Let’s see; Cooking in Code. “You seem very happy with your body, and comfortable in your own skin, even despite the haters. I know that even after losing weight and achieving their goal, people often struggle with body image issues, and find it hard to be happy with their body.” Oh my gosh. I’m not yawning at your question, I swear to god, Cooking in Code. “Do you have any tips for being happy with your body where it’s at, and being comfortable in your skin?”

So, this is an ongoing battle. I am comfortable in my skin, but I have; we all have days where it’s hard. I look at photos of myself every single day. That pretty much sucks. When you’re not looking at photos of yourself, I think it makes it a little bit easier. But I’m literally editing photos almost every day of myself, and my face. And my skin. And my teeth. So I obsess a little bit more than a normal person would.

But, when I start seeing myself get to that point, I cut it off. And I say, I’m not doing this. You’re not doing this. Stop. You’re better than this. And I move on. I put my head space into a different activity. So to me, I lived my life for probably 25 years hating myself and talking down on myself. And where did it get me? It got me no f*cking where. Nowhere. And I just don’t want to do that anymore. So when I see myself going into that downward spiral, I say, Ok. I’m not doing this. I’m going to go concentrate on something else. I’m going to go work. I’m going to go take some pictures of food. I’m going to go for a walk. I get my mind off of it, and I move on. I have insecurities just like anybody else. I just don’t talk about them. That’s it at the end of the day.

I used to talk about it incessantly. And it’s like, who gives a f*ck? Everybody has issues. Everybody has insecurities. It doesn’t change. And nobody saying anything is going to validate it. So I have to validate myself. And I validate myself by working hard in the gym. Being in good relationships with people. Eating well. And living a happy life. And if those things don’t validate me, then I need to change it. So I just don’t concentrate on the little things. And when I’m going down a downward spiral, I put that energy towards something else. And don’t dwell on it.

19. Balancing cardio with weights [50:49]

Oh, and she had another question. “How do you balance cardio and weight lifting?” I kind of think of everything I do as cardio and weight lifting together. I mean, I don’t go into the gym thinking, “Ok I’m about to do my cardio.” I literally have not thought that way for 7 or more years. Because CrossFit is both. We do weight lifting, we do cardiovascular. So no matter what, I’m always getting some kind of lifting in, and some kind of cardio in. Whether I’m doing Orange Theory or CrossFit. I don’t think about balancing it, because I’m always doing it.

20. Picking a cocktail [51:27]

This next one. “What’s your favorite cocktail to get when you want a drink without all the sugar? I always get vodka sodas, but I’m always looking for other options.” Here’s the thing. I don’t like alcohol that much. If I’m going to have a cocktail. I’m going to have a fun cocktail that I know I like. I’m not going to waste those calories on a boring vodka soda. And I used to do that all the time when I was drinking heavily in college. I had vodka sodas up the wazoo. But if I’m going out knowing I’m going to drink, I have a fun cocktail. And I usually cut it out after 2 cocktails. And after I’ve had 2, it’s like ok. If you’re having a third, you’re not going to feel so great. So I tend to cut it off at 2.

But I don’t want just alcohol in a sh*tty version, if that makes sense. I would just rather be sober and drink water. So it’s either an all out bad for you cocktail with sugar and all the good stuff, or it’s nothing at all. I’d rather just drink water. So I’m sorry I can’t have better advice for that. But that’s how I do it. I’d rather all in or no thanks.

21. Stopping the self sabotage [52:39]

This is from Kelsey. “Do you have any advice for those who are ready to make a change, start to see progress, and then as soon as you see success, become fearful and sabotage all efforts on the weekend. For an example, I’ll be motivated for 2 weeks, start to see some results, then totally go overboard on the weekend. And then continue to be off track the next week. It’s a bad revolving cycle that I cannot get out of.”

Well here’s the thing, Kelsey. Stop saying you can’t get out of it. Because that’s the first worst part of people, and I’ve done this in the past, too. Saying you can’t do something as easy as not sabotaging yourself. You say you can’t do it; well you f*cking can. Maybe you can’t scale Mt. Everest. Maybe you can’t, I don’t know. Maybe you can’t do something else. You can stop sabotaging yourself. You just have to make the decision to not do that anymore.

So I did this for a long time. I ate so healthy Monday through Friday, then the weekend would come and I would f*cking eat everything in sight. I would eat complete sh*t. And then come Monday, I’d gain 10 pounds and felt terrible and upset with myself and sad and depressed. At one point, I was like, What the f*ck am I doing? Why am I doing this? I hate myself on Monday. And I have to find balance. I can’t do this anymore. So I stopped doing it. And that’s at the end of the day. We all make decisions. And what sets us apart from other people is one person says they can’t do something, and another person says, “Let me try it.”

So you have to just stop doing it. Stop saying you can’t do something, and start saying, Ok. The weekend is here. I’m not going to eat junk food. And I’m not going to overdo it on cocktails. I’m going to go out with my friends, and I’m going to have one cocktail, and I’m going to have soda water or I’m going to drink water the rest of the night. Or I’m going to go home early. Or you can be like me, and I say, I’m not going out with people because I don’t want the peer pressure of people pushing me to drink when I don’t want to. Because it’s f*cking annoying.

So you just have to make the decisions of how to make sure you don’t sabotage yourself. And some lifestyle changes, and maybe people you’re around has to change. But you can do it. You just have to say, “I can do it.” The hard truth is, you just can do it. You just have to figure it out on your own. That’s how I did it.

22. Staying on plan while sharing a home [55:19]

Chameleonaire! Like it. Like the name. “So it’s my senior year in college, and I still live at home. How do I get my parents on board? My mom loves cooking, but isn’t fully committing. It’s hard to stay on track when some people around me are temptingly me with unhealthy options.”

Ok, so I moved home with my parents after college. I had an internship that was near their house, and so I moved in with them for probably 6 to 9 months. And that was when I just started eating paleo. And I just start making my own food. That’s it at the end of the day. If your mom loves cooking and she’s not cooking the sh*t you want, then cook for yourself. Sorry mom. I mean, you’re a senior in college, so you’re like, 21, 22? You can easily make decisions on your own and you can cook your own food. So that’s what I did. I made my own food, and then I would sometimes make food for the family, and they would eat it or they wouldn’t eat it. That’s up to them. But make your own food. And so then you’re not tempted with other food, because you made your own sh*t. Easy as that. Easy as pie.

23. Calorie counting [56:29]

Sarah asks, “Do you count your calories?” No.

24. Guilt over a cheat meal [56:36]

Billy Jean. “Do you ever feel guilty after eating a cheat meal? If so, how do you deal with the guilt?” So, I’ve talked about this on the blog and probably podcast. I don’t call anything a cheat meal, and I f*cking hate the word cheat meal. I just hate it. It’s just like is so negative. Like, when I think of cheat, I think of cheating on your spouse. And I don’t want to ever be cheated on. And I don’t ever want to cheat on my husband. And that’s something we would both never do. And so then you put it onto food; why would you cheat with your food? If that makes sense. You are putting it; you make the decision to do something. So I just hate when it’s like considered a cheat meal.

I don’t eat “cheat meals.” I eat food that I want, and sometimes I go overboard and most of the times I don’t. But I don’t ever see anything in a negative connotation when it comes to food. I just don’t see it like that. Because it puts a bad relationship on food, and I don’t want that relationship that I had my entire life anymore. So, if I eat something that I’m just not eating my healthiest; maybe I’m eating too much sugar. I’m having too much chocolate at night. And if it’s making me feel guilty in any way, then I just clean it up. I stop eating chocolate at night, and I eat a bigger dinner, more vegetables, and I just cut that court. And I don’t feel that guilt. And I just move on. So that’s how I deal with not a cheat meal, but the food I decided to eat. I just hate the word cheat meal. I hate it. It’s gross.

25. How frequently do you treat yourself [58:22]

Christy. “You’ve shared some amazing treat recipes. My question is, how often have you found that you can eat these treats without sabotaging your results? Once a day? A couple of times a week? And has that amount changed as you’re trying to lose weight versus now.”

When I make desserts, I get them out of the house pretty quickly. I share them with neighbors. I take them to the gym. Just the other week, these ones. I thought they would get eaten, and they just weren’t getting eaten in time. So they weren’t exactly how they are the first day you make them, because they were just sitting in the open air. I didn’t even container them in my fridge. And I knew I’d eat them, but I didn’t want to share them with anybody because they weren’t the best quality since it had been a couple of days. So I threw it all away. And that’s what I do.

So I try to get the treats out as quickly as possible. When I’m having one treat a day. Which I’ve done for a long time. But if I’m having one treat a day, I find myself just feeling not so great. And seeing a little bit extra weight on me from the sugar. And so, maybe if I’m making a treat recipe. Say I made these chocolate chip raspberry bars. I made those a couple of weeks ago. That would be a once a week type treat. Other treats that I eat are like dark chocolate, and that would be like a small couple of bites at night if I’m doing that on a regular basis. But I can usually see the difference when I start eating chocolate too often. So you know, I don’t say I can’t have something. But I just don’t like having it easily available. So a lot of times I’ll do freezer as well. So a craving calls, I can get it out of the freezer, but it’s just not as readily available.

So I think you have to find what works for you. And what works for you and your goals. And see how your body changes. And if you don’t care how your body changes, if you don’t see the changes. Everybody is different. But I like to leave those fancier treats for once a week, probably. And then smaller treats, like dark chocolate for every day or every couple of days depending on what I’ve got going on in life.

26. Making up new recipes [1:00:37]

OK. Lauren. “How the hell do you keep making up new recipes? Are you afraid you’re going to run out of brain power one day?” No. I do not fear that. There are unlimited combinations. It’s almost like; have you seen those Sonic drink combinations, where there are like 2 million combinations of different drinks you can make? Food is kind of that same way. I mean, literally, you could make a chicken dish, and you could use a completely different spice and it’s a completely new recipe. So there is no chance that you’ll really ever run out. So I haven’t burnt out. The only time I feel like I run out of ideas is when I’m making a cookbook and I’m writing for the blog as well. I think that’s very challenging to come up with new stuff.

So I don’t worry about that, but I think it’s really helped adding different stuff to my blog. So fashion, and workouts, and working with different companies, and promotion for companies. And then I try to share two recipes a week, and that’s really helped. Because before at one point I was trying to share 5 recipes a week. And that’s much harder. But doing different things helps with that, for sure.

27. Working with an esthetician [1:01:55]

OK. Let’s see. Oh hey, it’s just Jay. I don’t know what that says. Ok. “When did you decide enough is enough with your skin, and you made the move to an esthetician? I’m 29 and my acne seems to still be going strong, unfortunately. Did cutting out certain things from your diet help? I’m aggressively trying to pay for grad school. So I’m trying to wait until that’s done to spend money on non-essentials, such as my face, but I’m very self-conscious of the acne. Did any over the counter products work well?”

So the biggest thing for me. Everybody’s acne is so different. Your hormones are so different. So there’s a ton of different causes. Cutting out eggs and nuts long-term has been very beneficial to my skin. At the Food and Wine Classic this past weekend, I ate a lot of eggs because that’s what was around for breakfast. Like the best protein. It was like, eggs or you’re eating scones. And I don’t eat scones. So, I ate more eggs, and I broke out right away. And I was drinking wine, of course, and just having more sugar. But, the eggs that I had at the Food and Wine Classic made my skin break out. I had like 5 zits. And then once I got home and cut those eggs out, my skin completely cleared up. So cutting out eggs and nuts has been huge for me.

And then I went on Accutane years ago. Accutane is very controversial, and a lot of people have had bad experiences with that. I was not that person, and I would recommend it to anyone. Of course, do your research, talk to your doctor. But I had a great experience with Accutane. So that’s what really helped me clear my skin up. And no over the counter products worked for me.

I highly recommend people check out Vivant skin care products. I know a couple of people have written to me and thanked me for telling them about those products, because it’s helped clear up their acne. So I would recommend checking them out. They’re not the craziest expensive. They’re definitely a little bit more than over the counter. And drinking a sh*t ton of water. That helps your skin for sure. But, it was the eggs and nuts that I really had to cut out of my diet, and stay away from. And that’s helped my skin a lot.

28. Do you miss competing in CrossFit [1:04:44]

Ok. Let’s see, Rebecca. “Do you ever miss competing in CrossFit, that you feel like you want to do it again, if it weren’t for the downside you felt? I’ve read about what you felt in earlier posts.” Rebecca, you worded this odd. So, I miss competing in CrossFit. I miss beating people. {laughs} I really liked that part when I was competing in CrossFit, of kind of being the underdog, and being able to beat women that I hadn’t before, at future competitions I beat them. I love that. I love the comradery and community at competitions. But at the same time, I can’t imagine spending a weekend at a competition nowadays. That sounds f*cking awful. And I think there’s a lot of douche baggery in CrossFit competitions, and I just don’t really miss that. But I miss the competitiveness. I miss just being able to push my body to different limits that aren’t possible at this point. I just miss that. I love that.

And I must be a masochist; I love the feeling of just like, I can’t go any further. And then you do. And I had that the other day. We had a workout that was rowing, wall balls, and running. And it was very hot that day. It was like 97 degrees out. And the run, it’s a 470 run. It’s like our 400-route, but it’s 470 meters. And I was in the last run, and I was like, I’m either going to throw up or I’m going to sh*t myself. I literally thought I was going to lose all control of my bowels into my green pants. Light green. How terrible would that be. And then I finished, and I beat the guy that I was trying to beat in the class. I beat him. And that was my whole goal. And I love that feeling. And even though I was like, I almost lost control of my anus. Sorry if that was too much visual. But I almost lost control. And I f*cking love it. I love it. I love that pain. And being able to push longer and harder than somebody else.

And I can really pull myself into some adrenal fatigue, so I have to make sure I don’t do that. If you don’t know what adrenal fatigue is, just Google it. I had a question about adrenal fatigue. You can learn about that through Google. It has much better information than me. But I can really put myself into some fatigue, because I will push and push. Because I’m stubborn as f*ck. And try to beat that person. And yeah, I almost threw up in the meantime. So I love that. I guess I miss the masochist, is that how you say it? I think that’s how you say it. Behavior of CrossFit competitions. Love that sh*t. But yeah, I would never go back.

29. White rice versus brown [1:08:00]

Ok. “I’ve heard white rice is actually better for you than brown rice, and I wanted to know if you see a difference when you eat rice.” So, white rice. If I’m saying this correctly, I think I am. But remember, Google has better answers for you, than me. Ever. Probably.

So think of a grain of rice. Brown rice has the hull; I think that’s what it’s called. It has the outside barrier. And then white rice, it’s stripped of that hull. I think I’m saying this correctly. I don’t f*cking know. But, it’s stripped of that. And I process white rice much better than I process brown rice. Because brown rice, since it has the hull on it. Am I saying this correctly? I should have researched this question. But we ain’t got time. But yeah, I process white rice much better because my body can break it down. My stomach acids can break it down a little bit easier. I think. But yeah. Google that sh*t, it will have better information. Because you know, you can’t rely on me for anything except Bachelor recaps, really.

30. Photography tips [1:09:14]

McKay. “Photography tips? Also, is CrossFit worth the cost?” Ok, so photography tips. I’m guessing you’re talking about food photography, maybe? So food photography, you need natural light. And these are all my opinions. Just remember that. And I’m not a photographer. I’ve never taken photography classes. I don’t know what the f*ck I’m doing. {laughs} So take it with a grain of salt, if you know what I’m saying.

So I take my photos right next to a big, what am I trying to say? Window. Jesus. So I take my pictures next to a big window that brings in natural light. I don’t use any light in the bedroom. Set the dish up right next to the natural light that’s coming in. And then I use a piece of poster board. So that thick, white poster board. I use that to reflect the shadow. So say you have the window on the left-hand side of your plate of food, and then on the right-hand side you’re going to have a piece of poster board. And you can literally look this kind of stuff up. There’s great books about food photography as well. But this white poster board, it reflects that light. So you can take away all the shadows that might be on the right side of the plate.

I like using linens. I personally like flowers in my photos. I think it just gives this really beautiful texture and color and just freshness to the food. I’ve had complaints from people, saying they don’t like the flowers. And that’s just personal style. And I think those people suck. {laughs} So one of my favorite food photographers. I actually met her. She’s like 21. She’s so young. Her name is Tegan. I don’t know if she’s 21, but she’s young. Her blog is Half Baked Harvest. And she’s the one who gave me inspiration of using flowers in my photography. But her photos are stunning. So whatever.

But I love natural light. I love flowers. And linens. Start figuring out what color makes something pop. A lot of times, say I’ll have reds in my food. Maybe I’m doing tacos and it has a bunch of red peppers. I like to use a blue linen that kind of pops with that color. And it depends on the mood, and the time of year, change up those linens. I have a sh*t-ton of linens that I use.

But another food photographer who does great stuff on Instagram, and she does kind of how she sets up her shots. And I think she’s even done seminars. Is Broma Bakery. And I love her. And she’s f*cking hilarious, too. People who are funny are my favorite. Why is everybody so serious all the time? She is not serious. She’s hilarious. And she does absolutely stunning food photography. So check out Half Baked Harvest and Broma Bakery.

And then I edit my photos in light room. I don’t know what the f*ck I’m doing. I just edit them until I like how they look, and I keep figuring it out along the way. And then any outfit photos I take in natural light, where it’s in the shade usually or it’s a cloudy day. That makes it a little bit easier. If it’s super sunny, I wear sunglasses so I’m not squinting the whole time and I can keep my face up without creating shadows on my face. So that’s how I do that. Hope that helps!

31. Hair washing [1:12:44]

This one is, “How often do you wash your hair?” Oh honey. Maybe twice a week if I’m lucky. And I don’t really do much to my hair. I just throw it in a nasty-ass bun, that I just put on my Instagram stories. And that’s how I do my hair. Because I actually had somebody ask me how I do my bun, so I just did an Instagram story about it. But I literally was my hair whenever I have to take outfit photos, or go to an actual event. So I try to do it twice a week. If that. If that. I work from home. You’ve got to remember that.

32. Eating at sporting events [1:13:14]

This question I think is hilarious. It says, “I know you’re not a fan of sports.” Because sports are the worst. “What do you eat on those long days of being at a stadium.” Ok, honey, I have not spent “long days” at a stadium. I have gone to baseball games. We usually show up late to a baseball game, or leave early. But at our stadium, they have a baked potato station. So you can get a baked potato and put pulled pork or steak and veggies on top. And it’s almost like your building nachos, but with a potato. So I go there every time. Because I know I’m going to make a good choice. So that’s what I recommend for people, is to look up the stadium. Look at the food that’s available at the stadium, and plan ahead. If there’s no good at the stadium, well hide some snacks in your purse or your jacket or whatever. Hide some snacks. I’ve done that plenty of times. And plan ahead. Eat a full meal before you go so you’re not eating sh*tty food. It’s all about planning. Life is all about planning.

33. All the guys you’ve dated [1:14:22]

Ok. This one says, “How many guys did you date.” I love this. This is like totally random and I love this. “How many guys did you date seriously before your husband?” So I dated; I’m going to go through names. Is that weird? I don’t’ care. So my first boyfriend, Brittan,