GUESS WHAT?! I have the winners of the Goodbody Giveaway!! Yaaaaaayy!! I told you to post comments that made me laugh or smile. And these two winners did!! Heather just flat out made me laugh. And Emily wrote a legit poem. What a badass…that has a lot of time on her hands. I like her.


‘Gluten makes me sweaty. I love cookies. Sometimes I break down and eat said cookies. I sweat all night. My bedsheets stink. Gluten free cookies = problem solved.’


This girl is awesome, have you seen her bod?

She says she’s single but I can’t see why
Who else do you know that can create a paleo pie?!

Recipe upon recipe she can write,
She’s writing her own cookbook so she must be bright.

Her humor is quirky
And I really hope this poem will work-y

I’m trying to pretend I know how to write
All because I want those damn cookie bites.

… If this isn’t pathetic than I don’t know what is.’

If you are a Heather or an Emily, check your inbox since I sent the email asking for your personal info. Creeeeepy. Are you sad you’re not the winner? That’s ok! Be a good person and give back to small businesses. You can purchase Goodbody Baked Goods right here! You WILL NOT regret it!!

Anywho! I need to get something off my chest. I hate bluetooth headsets. Ok wait, if you’re driving then that’s ok. But if you’re walking around the grocery store or sitting next to me at Starbucks with a headset in, on the ear I can’t see, I will automatically think you’re a weirdo. Understand one thing, I work on a street that is infamous for drunks and homeless people. That means I see people babbling to themselves about 16 times a day. Those people usually lack shirts and cannot make human eye contact, but still, I consider them crazy. So, if you are next to me while I order my coffee and are having a conversation, I will automatically think you are insane and create space between you and I. I’m just being honest. You high tech psycho.

I feel like I’m uncool because I don’t wear half shirts. You know the shirts that are high cut so your belly button shows. Yeah, I can’t wear those. Why? Because I’m not cool. Or hip. Or a size zero. Or even brave enough for that sh*t. I try to be in style then the style changes to a teeny bopper style and I can’t keep up. And I know I’m offending all of you that wear those shirts, but it’s ok, because my roommate/best friend sports those kind of shirts. So I can do that. It’s my blog. And my best friend.

Are you bored with this recipe? I am too, kind of. But here’s the thing. I leave out of town today so I don’t have much real food in the house other than leftovers. So I’m eating old salmon, arugula, plantain chips, and bacon and eggs. Why the f*ck am I complaining? All that stuff sounds divine. Problem is, it’s not super blog worthy. So I had to yank this recipe out of my ass…gross visual…and add anything I had in my pantry to it. But it was wonderful. Bananas AND figs?!? Shut the front door. I just shed a tear.

5.0 from 5 reviews

Fig and Banana Protein Shake (and Goodbody giveaway winners!!)
Prep time

Total time


Serves: 1


  1. Place all ingredients in a food processor or blender.
  2. Turn food processor or blender on.
  3. Puree until completely broken down and mixed together.
  4. Drink.
  5. Be merry.