Days that don’t start with a shower are less than favorable. Believe me, I’m not one to wash my hair every day. Or even every other day. I have to dye it ALL.THE.TIME so I try not to wash it out. But, I do love myself a good wash down. That sounds weird. Anywho, the other day, our duplex neighbors decided to shut off the wash while they went out of state for the holidays. Problem is, it’s our water as well. Yep, we share that water. Not like I’m bathing in their used water or anything, but you get the gist. Well, when the shut it off, it shut ours off. It didn’t matter if it was mid shower, with conditioner in the hair. Nope. It wasn’t coming back on until the landlord got into their house and turned it back on. So I waited, for hours, with conditioner in my hair, wishing I had a glass of water, or could brush my teeth, or could make a cup of coffee. But it did not happen for a couple hours. My hair smelled awesome for the rest of the day.

If you ever wondered if you could run almond milk through your Keurig instead of water…you can’t. Don’t try it.

So when Friday night rolled around, I got a present at my doorstep. A present from Two live lobsters. For some reason, I didn’t expect them to be live. I have no clue why, probably because I’m an idiot, but there they were. Scraping at the box them came in. At first, I freaked the eff out. I don’t know how to cook lobster, I don’t know how to put them into a pot, I don’t want to get pinched because they are hella pissed. But it went fine. I seasoned a pot of water, called two strapping young men to help me, and had them grab the lobsters to put them into the pot. I was too freaked out. But they were kind guys, they made the lobsters nice and comfortable before we killed them. Sorry to be frank, but that’s what you have to do to get food. Kill the animal.

When I added some pictures on instagram of the lobsters, people got pissed. Not all people, but more people than I would think. No one EVER says anything about the cooked sausage I post pictures. Or the cooked chicken. Or the steak. But when it’s a lobster, people say I’m mean and they are unfollowing me. I don’t get that. People never talk about the inhumane treating of cows when I post a picture of a steak I ate. All they say is, ‘omg. my mouth is watering.’ But when it’s a lobster, they say, ‘people would go crazy if you boiled a human alive.’ Like, what? Come on people. Terrible comparison.

I failed on 3 cookie recipes this weekend. THREE. I’m going to try to make them once more today. If they fail, I’d like to act like I will get really mad. But I’ll probably just cry. Stupid paleo cookies.

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Bacon Wrapped Meatballs over Roasted Butternut Squash

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5 from 1 review

  • Yield: 3-4 1x


  • 1 large butternut squash
  • 3 tablespoons fat of choice (bacon fat, coconut oil, ghee, butter, etc.)
  • 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
  • 1/4 teaspoon onion powder
  • salt, to taste
  • 1 pound ground pork
  • 1/2 yellow onion, minced
  • 2 garlic cloves, minced
  • salt and pepper, to taste
  • 10 pieces of bacon


  1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
  2. Cut the bulb off of the butternut squash and just use the end. It’s just easier to work with. Cut the skin off the butternut squash then dice the butternut squash into bit size pieces.
  3. Place butternut squash on a parchment paper lined baking sheet. Pour choice of fat on top of butternut squash, sprinkle with garlic and onion powder and salt, mix well to coat the squash.
  4. In a bowl, mix together ground pork, onion, garlic cloves, and salt and pepper until well combined.
  5. Make 10 equal sized meatballs.
  6. Cut all pieces of bacon in half. Wrap a half piece of bacon around the meatball, then the other piece in the opposite direction. Tuck the ends of the bacon underneath the meatball then place it cut side down on a parchment paper lined baking sheet.
  7. Place both baking sheets in the oven and bake for 25-30 minutes, until butternut squash is soft and meatballs are firm.
  8. Serve with a green, because then you feel super healthy. And colorful.

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  1. Christelyn says:

    Hi there! I’m new to the site but been paleo for about a year. I run a large blog of primarily African American women. We get 500,000 page views per month. Would love to interview you about the paleo lifestyle so my readers, many of them struggle with obesity, can adopt. Email me at

    1. juli says:

      Hey send me an email at! I would love to chat with you!

  2. Erika says:

    We made this recipe tonight and it was delish. I’ve never used butternut squash before and now I’m a fan.

  3. Molly says:

    1st timer here. Love it AND your sense of humor. You would fit in fine around my table. I am not totally paleo and may not ever be (love pasta and ice cream too much – not together) but and trying to incorporate more of the philosophy into our lifestyle. I can’t wait to try this recipe… i already love all the ingredients. Anxious for the cookie recipe too. Hope the fourth time is the one!

    1. juli says:

      Hey Molly!! Hope you like the recipes!! I posted the fourth try recipe haha they are the soft and chewy molasses spice cookies

  4. Stephanie says:

    I JUST made this recipe for my hubby for tonight! Can’t wait to see what he thinks! It smells SOOOOOOOOO good =) Thanks for the wonderful recipe.

  5. Ashley says:

    Hi! So I made these tonight, however, when I cut the meatballs in half to check them….the pork was not done in the designated time frame. I ended up cutting them in half and letting them cook for 10 extra minutes. Did I make them too big? The outside next to the bacon would not cook without cutting them in half….
    Otherwise, they tasted awesome!!!!

    1. juli says:

      that could be the case!

  6. Erin says:

    I’m fairly sure I can picture you perfectly, having once shown up at my parents house holding a garbage bag containing a pair of live lobsters (a friend has family out east, and ships them in in bulk a couple times during the season). You should’ve seen the look on my mom’s face when I pulled one of the wiggly dudes out of the bag – “But… IT’S ALIVE!!” Well yeah. They’re poisonous after they’ve been dead a while.

  7. Stefan says:

    There is nothing paleo about this. As an anthropologist, and a chef I suggest that maybe you should consider doing more research into what an actual paleolithic diet would consist of before calling it one.

    1. juli says:

      Thanks so much for the feedback, Stefan.

    2. Robert says:

      Wow, you are absolutely correct Stefan and thank you so much for pointing that out. Let me take a note with my blackened stick on my cave wall… Seriously, the stupid ideas people have about Paleo are amazing. Here are the basics Stefan, Paleo lifestyles are not trying to recreate the caveman existence but putting natural food (i.e. non-processed) into our bodies since that is what the human race ate for 99.5% of our existence. Everything in this recipe is natural and no chemicals or extra ingredients were added (I realize spices in this form weren’t around but neither was toilet paper and I am not giving that up either). But best of luck Stefan with your Anthropology and cooking, you will need it to keep you company because you sound like an ass.