Shrimp with Citrus Avocado Mash

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I don’t think this is really considered a recipe. BUT I DON’T CARE. And I know this totally looks like a recipe I did the other day, but work with me here. Shrimp and avocado just goes together like frosting and cupcakes. Not quite as well, but you get my flow. And I’m not into meat right now so I’m making everything simple and to the point. Ain’t nobody got time for hatin’ food, brahhhh.

Who am I?

I think everyone has their own personal hell. For some people, it’s the gym. Other, it’s their work. Mine, is the post office. I have never EVER had a good experience at the post office. The people who work there seem to truly hate not only their lives, but the world around them. There is always a line of at least 10 people. There are never any pens. And it smells weird. I don’t know if it actually smells weird, but it seems like a place that would. It’s my living hell. And what sucks is that it’s the cheapest place to ship anything. I’ve been shipping books all over the place but the other day I decided I couldn’t step foot into the same post office even one more time. So I went to UPS to ship the 3 books. When it would usually cost me $20, it cost me $70. Wtfsf? Try to figure out that acronym. That’s what I get for thinking bad things about the post office. I will now have to pull my big girl panties on and march back in the post office. Especially since they have a package waiting for me there right now. F*ck.

Ok enough cursing, you guys. Get it together.

I posted a picture of a child with my cookbook yesterday on instagram saying that even though I’m not really into children, I thought she was adorable. Then someone wrote in the comments “children are people too”. Well no sh*t, you idiot. Doesn’t mean I’m into them. Then I saw one on my nail picture where I talked about who did my nails AND the salon they were done at, and a person asked where I got them done at. I don’t know how to make it any more clear than that. I just don’t know.

Speaking of getting my nails did, I’m doing so just to get ready for the next leg of the book tour for my second cookbook, The Paleo Kitchen. This trip is actually going to be a short one. We were planning a longer trip for later in the month but then remembered that The CrossFit Games were going on a since people sh*t a brick and head to that event, we decided we needed to bump it up earlier. But since it was such late notice, we only were able to book a couple events in Texas. So far, we have Dallas and Houston nailed down, just finishing up some info about Austin. I couldn’t head to Texas and miss Austin. It’s my favorite. So hopefully I will know all the information for you by tomorrow about Austin! So, are YOU coming to visit us in Texas? Please say yes. And bring me a cupcake. I’ll definitely need a cupcake.

  • On Sunday July 13th at 7 PM we will be in Dallas at Half Price Books: 5803 E. Northwest Hwy., Dallas, Texas 75231
  • On Tuesday, July 15th at 7 PM we will be in Houston at Blue Willow Bookshop: 14532 Memorial Drive, Houston, TX, 77079
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Shrimp with Citrus Avocado Mash

  • Yield: 3-4 1x
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Ingredients

For the shrimp

  • 1 pound raw peeled and deveined shrimp
  • 2 tablespoon olive oil (or other fat)
  • 1/2 tablespoon garlic powder
  • salt, to taste

For the avocado mash

  • 2 avocados, mashed
  • 1 tablespoon hot sauce of choice (I used Frank’s Red Hot Sauce)
  • juice of 1 lime
  • juice of 1/2 a lemon
  • 1 garlic clove, minced
  • 1/2 small red onion, minced
  • handful of cilantro, roughly chopped (about 1/2 cup)
  • lots of salt

Instructions

  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Line a baking sheet with foil for easy clean up. Place shrimp on baking sheet, toss shrimp in olive oil then lay flat on the baking sheet. Sprinkle with salt and garlic powder. Place in oven and bake for 15 minutes or until pink with a little browning color to them.
  3. While shrimp bake, mix together all ingredients for avocado mash.
  4. Eat shrimp with avocado mash. Boom. Summer is served.

 

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Oh, Hi! I’m Juli.

I’m a food hoarder. And a really bad dancer. If you don’t know me well, you will probably not understand my humor. Therefore, I apologize ahead of time. Thanks for listening to my ramblings of my ever-changing life and trusting my kitchen mishaps. Your trust in me is appreciated.

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35 thoughts on “Shrimp with Citrus Avocado Mash”

  1. I don’t think you could be any more right about post offices. I have been dealing with my own personal nightmare with my post office! What perfect timing. At least now we can establish that they are consistently a bad organization full of completely incompetent and unhappy individuals!!!!!! Have safe travels in Texas!!!!!

  2. So excited that you guys are coming to Austin! My friend and I were just saying last night that we wished you would. I’ll be there for sure! Can’t wait!

  3. That’s really mean to pick on the children, Juli.

    Maybe you should have a disclaimer above your blog:

    *If you are very literal, and/or do not like to laugh, you will enjoy reading someone else’s blog. Not mine.

  4. It kills me when you post an instagram pic with cheese AND the hashtag “#notstrictpaleo” and someone says, “I didn’t think cheese was paleo?!”
    Like… really, people?
    Back to food…. I have all of these ingredients, so yeah, this is happening soon. Thanks!

  5. I don’t like other children yet have a 4 year old daughter. Figure THAT one out!! But she’s perfect & precious & well-behaved – unlike other mini heathens… AHH!!!! You’re in Texas…but I’m still too far up in the Panhandle to come see you 🙁 Enjoy your tour! And thanks for the LOL’s this morning!

  6. Thanks for the recipe–this looks delish and I’m making it tonight. I’ve been looking for an alternative to cocktail sauce because of the sugar–and remoulade sauces usually contain eggs (to which I’m highly allergic). Never thought to try something like this with shrimp. That’s why I read your blog!

  7. Ah! I hope you come to Austin! But my book is in Vermont… 🙁 I shipped it there so my mom can look through/play with it before I go up there in August a and make ALL the things!
    But I still can’t wait to see you in Austin!

  8. I live in Dallas and debating coming over to your book tour. I was wondering if it’s strictly a signing or if you’re giving a speech/rant/blog reading? I bought your book electronically so I have nothing for you to sign. If I had known you were coming earlier, I would’ve waited for a hard copy!

    1. we will be chatting about ourselves/our stories along with how the book came to be and answering any questions people have!

  9. I also loathe the post office. So I only ship flat rate now….you can get boxes mailed to you for free and print up the postage online. Easy peasy….you can then do a drive buy and throw the package into an open USPS door. Hehe Recipe looks great…can’t wait to try it. I have your book and have loved every recipe…thanks.

  10. If it makes you feel any better, I feel the same way about the Post Office. I rebelled and tried shipping FedEx last year. I did okay shipping a huge heavy box of Christmas presents to family across the country, but I tried to ship a small gladware container of Christmas cookies to my boyfriend (literally like 6 cookies) and FedEx wanted $20+ dollars. So I ended up going back to the Post Office for that one. *sigh* You could buy a dozen or more paleo cookies from a local bakery for that price (if there was a local bakery that made paleo cookies up there…)

  11. Post Offices are of the devil.

    Every time I read comments on your instagram I think “she must be one of the most patient people ever”. I could not do it… the stuff people say just blows my mind. I would be reaming people out all the time and walk around pissed off every day all day… but hey… maybe I could get a job at the Post Office!

  12. I don’t like going to the post office either because I hate waiting in line. Thankfully, I’ve never had an extremely horrible experience otherwise (knock on wood!).

    I love mashed avocado! It’s so simple yet delicious!

  13. Hi Juli! I have read your blog forever and I follow your Instagram! I just thought I’d stop to comment (I never have before) to tell you how fabulous I think you are! You are SOOO funny and witty and always make me laugh 🙂 you are very very inspirational, and even though I’m a vegetarian I still LOVE reading your posts and trying your dessert recipes! Anyway, thank you so much for being you, and never stop <3 xoxoxoxoxo
    Love AH

  14. I will be seeing you in Houston! Also, if you have time, pop on over to Crossfit Eado for a WOD. I’ve been going there since March and I love it!

  15. This is officially my favorite blog, like, ever of all time. I have nothing productive to add to the comments, I just wanted to put that out there.

  16. You’re so funny lol…try the military APO post office. It does really smell bad, and its like complete morons work behind the counter. I am pretty sure my 2 year old could do a better job. I mean, how many times do they have to call me because the package I “tried” to mail, was “wrong” because they charged wrong or lost the customs paperwork etc…I love how I was charged 3 times and they said there’s no way to refund me…really?! Like I said…morons. Enough about that. Shrimp is awesome. So are cupcakes. =P.

  17. I TOTALLY get you on people asking super dumb questions. I work with people, PhDs for that matter, all over the country via e-mail and people will ask me a question THAT IS CLEARLY STATED in the email… highlighted…bold letters… caps… freaking stars all around it with flashing arrows. Nope, doesn’t work for some people. HOW DO YOU EVEN FUNCTION IN LIFE?!?! I just can’t.

  18. I got your new cookbook this week and made the honey mustard and grilled baby bok choy. So yummy , I have plans for many more recipes from there as well . Great cookbook!

  19. Your comment about children made me laugh the other day…I’m not all that into them myself unless they are super cute, don’t whine, and don’t poop.

    Any who….please come to Boston on your next book tour!! Would love to also have you at my CF gym (CrossFit Synergistics), but I could also recommend some CF’s in the city which would be more convenient (my gym is outside the city).

    Have a great day!

  20. It’s a recipe if you tell people how to make it right? Ha I can relate because most of the time I feel like my stuff is more “meal ideas” than recipes but whatever. People like simple stuff anyway.

    I agree with you on the post office and the library gives me hives too. I don’t have a library card and don’t take my kids there. It’s too quiet and I feel like a sh*t show in comparison.

    Also I have 3 kids but I’m not into kids in general, as in other people’s kids. Not sure what’s wrong with that!

  21. Since you mentioned you hate the post office, I have to tell you about one of the post office workers in my town. He got arrested for a DUI, asked to use the restroom, then ate his own poop! I assume to taint the breath test. Then, he spat on the police officer!!! True story, you can google it. It happened in Durango, CO. But don’t let that story ruin whatever impression you may have of Durango. Durango is WONDERFUL! You should come out for a visit. Love the shrimp recipe, BTW. I’m liking lighter meals lately too.

  22. Oh, man, the comments you have to deal with on Instagram!
    For the record, I do have children. In fact, I have one, another on the way, and am planning to adopt one more after that. I’m pregnant and hormonal and do not find your comment about not being a kid person offensive at ALL. Totally nothing wrong with saying that.
    Not that you were asking for validation, but just in case you wanted it….:-)

  23. Hmm I’d never thought of my place of employment as someone else’s hell. I guess it does make sense, while no one in particular seems to hate their life they don’t seem to enjoy themselves either. I’m kinda in paradise because they pay is good and me lacking people skills well it’s nice I don’t have to talk to anyone. For the most part the most I can say is that everyone is pretty lazy and find ways around doing the things they are supposed to, while the main clerk, the person you’d be dealing with spends most of her time telling sob stories and manipulating people into giving her shit…she also wastes lots of time using her post to sell tupperware. ~.~ Thankfully I’m not there…hell for me would be having that job, especially with the people who whip shit out of their titties…yes hell for me is working as a cashier.

  24. Just made this today and it was awesome!!! This is definitely going to make regular appearance on my dinner menu!

  25. Tamera Aponte

    I made this the other night with a salmon dish and wow, wow, wow. It really was delicious. I like the little kick the hot sauce gave it.

  26. LOL, LOL, about children! I was totally in the same boat! My friends used to bring their newborns over for visits, shove them in my arms and then laugh their arses off when the damn thing would start crying bloody murder! Ya, OK very funny ladies. Now, many years later I have a 2 year old (WTF was I thinking), but kids are pretty cute. Except for when you use a ghost cookie cutter for his sandwich and he freaks out because he wanted a pumpkin (happened this morning). I wanted to yell, WTF…does it really matter? I didn’t, but apparently, it does. Anyway enough of my rambling! Your post made me laugh and I plan on trying a variation of this recipe with scallops and using a plantain avocado mash! Oh and bacon somehow, somewhere. Will let you know the outcome 🙂 Thanks Juli!

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