I don’t think this is really considered a recipe. BUT I DON’T CARE. And I know this totally looks like a recipe I did the other day, but work with me here. Shrimp and avocado just goes together like frosting and cupcakes. Not quite as well, but you get my flow. And I’m not into meat right now so I’m making everything simple and to the point. Ain’t nobody got time for hatin’ food, brahhhh.

Who am I?

I think everyone has their own personal hell. For some people, it’s the gym. Other, it’s their work. Mine, is the post office. I have never EVER had a good experience at the post office. The people who work there seem to truly hate not only their lives, but the world around them. There is always a line of at least 10 people. There are never any pens. And it smells weird. I don’t know if it actually smells weird, but it seems like a place that would. It’s my living hell. And what sucks is that it’s the cheapest place to ship anything. I’ve been shipping books all over the place but the other day I decided I couldn’t step foot into the same post office even one more time. So I went to UPS to ship the 3 books. When it would usually cost me $20, it cost me $70. Wtfsf? Try to figure out that acronym. That’s what I get for thinking bad things about the post office. I will now have to pull my big girl panties on and march back in the post office. Especially since they have a package waiting for me there right now. F*ck.

Ok enough cursing, you guys. Get it together.

I posted a picture of a child with my cookbook yesterday on instagram saying that even though I’m not really into children, I thought she was adorable. Then someone wrote in the comments “children are people too”. Well no sh*t, you idiot. Doesn’t mean I’m into them. Then I saw one on my nail picture where I talked about who did my nails AND the salon they were done at, and a person asked where I got them done at. I don’t know how to make it any more clear than that. I just don’t know.

Speaking of getting my nails did, I’m doing so just to get ready for the next leg of the book tour for my second cookbook, The Paleo Kitchen. This trip is actually going to be a short one. We were planning a longer trip for later in the month but then remembered that The CrossFit Games were going on a since people sh*t a brick and head to that event, we decided we needed to bump it up earlier. But since it was such late notice, we only were able to book a couple events in Texas. So far, we have Dallas and Houston nailed down, just finishing up some info about Austin. I couldn’t head to Texas and miss Austin. It’s my favorite. So hopefully I will know all the information for you by tomorrow about Austin! So, are YOU coming to visit us in Texas? Please say yes. And bring me a cupcake. I’ll definitely need a cupcake.

  • On Sunday July 13th at 7 PM we will be in Dallas at Half Price Books: 5803 E. Northwest Hwy., Dallas, Texas 75231
  • On Tuesday, July 15th at 7 PM we will be in Houston at Blue Willow Bookshop: 14532 Memorial Drive, Houston, TX, 77079
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Shrimp with Citrus Avocado Mash

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5 from 3 reviews

  • Yield: 3-4 1x



For the shrimp

  • 1 pound raw peeled and deveined shrimp
  • 2 tablespoon olive oil (or other fat)
  • 1/2 tablespoon garlic powder
  • salt, to taste

For the avocado mash

  • 2 avocados, mashed
  • 1 tablespoon hot sauce of choice (I used Frank’s Red Hot Sauce)
  • juice of 1 lime
  • juice of 1/2 a lemon
  • 1 garlic clove, minced
  • 1/2 small red onion, minced
  • handful of cilantro, roughly chopped (about 1/2 cup)
  • lots of salt


  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Line a baking sheet with foil for easy clean up. Place shrimp on baking sheet, toss shrimp in olive oil then lay flat on the baking sheet. Sprinkle with salt and garlic powder. Place in oven and bake for 15 minutes or until pink with a little browning color to them.
  3. While shrimp bake, mix together all ingredients for avocado mash.
  4. Eat shrimp with avocado mash. Boom. Summer is served.

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  1. Jess says:

    LOL, LOL, about children! I was totally in the same boat! My friends used to bring their newborns over for visits, shove them in my arms and then laugh their arses off when the damn thing would start crying bloody murder! Ya, OK very funny ladies. Now, many years later I have a 2 year old (WTF was I thinking), but kids are pretty cute. Except for when you use a ghost cookie cutter for his sandwich and he freaks out because he wanted a pumpkin (happened this morning). I wanted to yell, WTF…does it really matter? I didn’t, but apparently, it does. Anyway enough of my rambling! Your post made me laugh and I plan on trying a variation of this recipe with scallops and using a plantain avocado mash! Oh and bacon somehow, somewhere. Will let you know the outcome 🙂 Thanks Juli!

  2. Josephine says:

    Omg I can not even wait to try this! i love your recipes!!! Just started Paleo and am in love with your site