Pumpkin Chocolate Chai Protein Shakes

Well these stories are absolutely fantastic. If my dog could write, these are some of the things he would be saying.

Jackson, my puppy, humped another dog yesterday. You know how I said he’s becoming a teenager…it’s official now. So upsetting. Please stay a puppy forever and don’t act on pheromones. Or hormones. Or whatever the hell puppies have that make them hump before they even are potty trained. Oh the agony.

So I posted a video of Jackson getting himself stuck under the couch yesterday. He’s really into doing that lately. He can shove himself underneath it, but then gets a bit confused how to get out. At least that’s what I take his barking as. To me his saying “WTF MOM. WHERE THE HELL AM I? WHAT THE HELL KEEPS TOUCHING MY HEAD?? WHY THE HELL CAN’T I TURN OVER?? WHAT’S GOING ON?????” That’s how I interpret him. Once I posted the video, I think some people took it as puppy abuse. Not sure why. I didn’t shove him under the couch and say HAHA jokes on your mother effer! No, you psychos. I have a soul, thank you very much. People who don’t like puppies have no soul. That’s just a straight up fact.

My hair is greasy. Gross.

When you’re shopping online, do you ever put a bunch of stuff in the shopping bag then just come back a couple days later to see if you still want it? I do. I do that with pretty much everything I buy. I’m an impulse shopper. So if I leave it alone for a few days and want it when I come back, I know that I truly want it. I think. At least that’s how it feels.

Speaking of shopping, I’m so so excited to go to Austin next week for Paleofx. It’s supposed to be in the 80s. I mean, I’m making that up because that’s what it’s suppose to be in my mind. I plan on wearing mostly dresses. Because I bought about 10 of them through the winter just day dreaming about the summer. I need to get my money’s worth. Ok, that’s my story. Bye.


Chocolate Chai Protein Shakes

  • Yield: 2 1x


  • 1.5 cups almond milk
  • 1/2 cup pumpkin puree
  • 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
  • 1 scoop of Chocolate Primal Fuel*
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 1 chai tea packet (the seasonings inside)
  • 1 cup ice cubes
  • sprinkle of cacao nibs


  1. Place almond milk, pumpkin puree, cocoa powder, protein powder, vanilla extract, the seasoning that are in the chai tea packet (cut the packet open and pour the seasonings out), and ice into a blender and puree until thick and smooth. I used a Blendtec twister jar and used the smoothie button to puree until perfect.
  2. Divide into two glasses and top with cacao nibs.


*If you decide not to use protein powder, be sure to add some sort of sweetener, about 2-3 tablespoons of either maple syrup, honey, or even coconut sugar.

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PaleOMG Chocolate Chai Protein Shakes


I love me some chai:

Dirty Chai Fluffy Pancakes

PaleOMG Pumpkin Chai Bread
Chai Pumpkin Bread


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Oh, Hi! I’m Juli.

I’m a food hoarder. And a really bad dancer. If you don’t know me well, you will probably not understand my humor. Therefore, I apologize ahead of time. Thanks for listening to my ramblings of my ever-changing life and trusting my kitchen mishaps. Your trust in me is appreciated.


42 thoughts on “Pumpkin Chocolate Chai Protein Shakes”

    1. Seriously. Puppy pictures, please. I now come here for awesome recipes, funny stories AND puppies (best website ever? it just might be).
      Also, you’re likely right about the weather here in Austin next week. It’s supposed to be almost 90 here today and it’s fantastic.
      Wildflowers are EVERYWHERE and the weather is warm enough to play outside, but not so hot you melt crossing the street.
      I hope you have a great visit, and get to wear dresses the whole time. Now, please post more pictures of your pup. Thank you!!!!

  1. Brooke Christen

    You are hilarious! I never comment on blogs but had to on this. Love “haha jokes on you mother effer!” I think it is so funny people think that’s puppy abuse.

  2. My english bulldog gets stuck under furniture.. he has done this since a puppy. He forces himself under the bed and then barks for help.. I just shake the treat container and he figures out quickly how to get out.

    LOVE all your Jackson pics!!! and recipes

  3. Hahaha! I love how you keep reiterating what to do with the tea!! I kept saying to myself, “really? the tea in the bag? She must mean something else, right?” Hahaha! Sounds fantastic and can’t wait to try!

  4. It gets really weird when other dogs start to hump your dog! I remember the first time another dog humped my dog, Corrina, and she just stood there and let it happen! Somehow, I felt completely violated and disgusted and she just stood there like nothing happened lol. Hmmph.

  5. Puppy humping before hormones kick in is definitely a play dominace thing, so it’s totally normal! I trained puppies (and was a doggie midwife!) when I worked at a vet clinic for 7 years. They all hump their siblings as young as 4 weeks (which is actually so so so cute), just as a “I’m totally in charge! King of the mountain!” Females will do it to other females too, as a show of dominance when they are older. 🙂

    And I second more puppy pictures, please!!!

  6. Yum! This shake looks awesome!

    Have fun at PaleoFX. If you go see Daniel Vitalis’s talk, please review it on the blog. I always love what he has to say 😉

  7. My Great Dane loved crawling under our furniture when he was little.. It only lasted about two weeks at the rate he grew.. but it was sad to watch when he tried and could no longer fit.

  8. First – Puppy stories like that are epic.
    Non puppy people just don’t understand.

    Anywho – I’ll be in Austin next week for the MotoGP races. So be prepared, by the weekend, the entire city will be filled with motorcycles and extremely good looking European racers.


  9. No worries! Humping is about dominance and puppy pecking order, not jsut cause they want to get some. Totally normal in limited quantities (even the girls get into it) as long as he isn’t going to town on someone’s leg 😉

  10. Puppies are adorable and I feel like once got one, I took more pictures in the first month than in the rest of my life totaled.
    Also, if you add things to your cart and then leave the website, more often than not if you have an account with them they will email you with a coupon in a few days. pays to wait!

  11. I absolutely will leave everything in my online cart & go back after a couple of days. It keeps me from buying what I think are cute shoes, and turn out to look ugly a few days later.

    I’m totally making this after I get some cacao nibs, although I’m pretty sure I’ll end up using some enjoy life chips until then.

    Puppies are hilarious. People who don’t laugh at the adorable antics of puppies have no soul.

  12. My dogs still get stuck under beds and they’re not exactly puppies.

    It’s nice and warm here in Austin! But even if it’s not you can still wear dresses because we’re all weird here so you’d just fit in.

    I’ll be at paleofx too, but I only have the expo pass so I won’t get to see your talk which is a big bummer. Maybe I’ll see you on the expo floor though! You should sneak Jackson in…

  13. I do that all the time with online shopping and actually bit the bullet and purchased 3 dresses for summer on Piperlime. It’ll be warm in Austin…the weather has been freaking gorgeous in Houston, so take those dresses and rock them. 🙂

  14. Living overseas, I pretty much shop online all the time and I do exactly the same thing. You know what’s terrible about that though, or at least what happens to me all the time? I’ll add stuff to the online basket and two days later it will no longer be available. I guess it’s actually a good thing since fate pretty much decides for me on whether I should buy the item. LOL! Anyway, thanks for sharing this recipe. I’ve been researching protein powders recently (new to the idea), so I’ll be sure to check out FormulX and this shake.

  15. So spices inside chai tea packet…do you mean the entire contents of a chai tea bag? I buy the Tazo chai so it would be black tea and the spices that I put in the recipe?

  16. Hahahaha. I love your blogs. I have a Dog Blog attached to my regular blog. I need to write more on it. Congrats on being a doggie mommie!

    The shake looks fabulous! Keep up the good recipes and blogs, girl!

  17. Yes, yes I do fill my online shopping cart, but usually to see how much my impulses cost with taxes and shipping. If they’re reasonable, I’ll press buy (and the cash limit on reasonable is VERY flexible).

    Just discovered your site. Thanks for the delish ideas and great stories.

  18. Absolutely love all your recipes keep them coming, however this one didn’t taste good Did everything you said HMMM kinda bland any suggestions?

  19. Great post! So hilarious. It doubly made my day: first with the glorious story and second with the delicious recipe!

  20. Dumb question… with the Chai Tea packet… you literally take a tea packet and open it up and dump it in? 🙂 HAD TO ASK 🙂 before i did it completely backasswards lol

  21. Juli – where did you get the pumpkin puree from? Did you just use canned pumpkin of the future pumpkin pie variety?


  22. Hey I cant seem to find chai tea packets, but I found some in the bulk food aisle. My question is how much of the chai is in one of those packets that you are talking about? Thank you!

  23. I live and die by your recipes! The chai pumpkin bread is one of my faves so I had to try this smoothie! Pumpkin, chocolate and chai?! but I must say I didn’t like this flavor combo. The chai was a little overwhelming. I think next time I’ll leave the chai out and it’ll be all good. Such a creative idea though!

  24. Great recipe! Was super excited to make it, but was a tad skeptical because of the starred reviews. Because of the two reviews I saw, I did change it a bit as I went. It really wasn’t sweet, not bland though, so I added xylitol. I also did coffee extract (1tsp) instead of chai for kicks and it turned out well!

  25. Omitted the protein powder and used truvia. But was not very good. The Chai was throwing me off, way too overpowering. If I make again I would only use half the packet or steep the Chai tea then pour into the mixture.

  26. This was delicious! I wasn’t sure after reading some of the reviews it I always love your recipes, and this one didn’t disappoint.

  27. Oh man this shake is awesome. Made it this morning and I was a little skeptical of the chai tea… but I don’t think it would be complete without it! Soooo good. And not sweet at all which I LOVE (guess that’s a result of the protein powder and almond milk you use though). I used a chai flavored protein powder and Stash brand black chai tea. Hot dam!

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