Well these stories are absolutely fantastic. If my dog could write, these are some of the things he would be saying.
Jackson, my puppy, humped another dog yesterday. You know how I said he’s becoming a teenager…it’s official now. So upsetting. Please stay a puppy forever and don’t act on pheromones. Or hormones. Or whatever the hell puppies have that make them hump before they even are potty trained. Oh the agony.
So I posted a video of Jackson getting himself stuck under the couch yesterday. He’s really into doing that lately. He can shove himself underneath it, but then gets a bit confused how to get out. At least that’s what I take his barking as. To me his saying “WTF MOM. WHERE THE HELL AM I? WHAT THE HELL KEEPS TOUCHING MY HEAD?? WHY THE HELL CAN’T I TURN OVER?? WHAT’S GOING ON?????” That’s how I interpret him. Once I posted the video, I think some people took it as puppy abuse. Not sure why. I didn’t shove him under the couch and say HAHA jokes on your mother effer! No, you psychos. I have a soul, thank you very much. People who don’t like puppies have no soul. That’s just a straight up fact.
My hair is greasy. Gross.
When you’re shopping online, do you ever put a bunch of stuff in the shopping bag then just come back a couple days later to see if you still want it? I do. I do that with pretty much everything I buy. I’m an impulse shopper. So if I leave it alone for a few days and want it when I come back, I know that I truly want it. I think. At least that’s how it feels.
Speaking of shopping, I’m so so excited to go to Austin next week for Paleofx. It’s supposed to be in the 80s. I mean, I’m making that up because that’s what it’s suppose to be in my mind. I plan on wearing mostly dresses. Because I bought about 10 of them through the winter just day dreaming about the summer. I need to get my money’s worth. Ok, that’s my story. Bye.
Chocolate Chai Protein Shakes
- Yield: 2 1x
Ingredients
- 1.5 cups almond milk
- 1/2 cup pumpkin puree
- 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
- 1 scoop of Chocolate Primal Fuel*
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1 chai tea packet (the seasonings inside)
- 1 cup ice cubes
- sprinkle of cacao nibs
Instructions
- Place almond milk, pumpkin puree, cocoa powder, protein powder, vanilla extract, the seasoning that are in the chai tea packet (cut the packet open and pour the seasonings out), and ice into a blender and puree until thick and smooth. I used a Blendtec twister jar and used the smoothie button to puree until perfect.
- Divide into two glasses and top with cacao nibs.
Notes
*If you decide not to use protein powder, be sure to add some sort of sweetener, about 2-3 tablespoons of either maple syrup, honey, or even coconut sugar.
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I love me some chai:
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I am tooooo excited that I have all these ingredients!!
What the hell, not one puppy picture?
Seriously. Puppy pictures, please. I now come here for awesome recipes, funny stories AND puppies (best website ever? it just might be).
Also, you’re likely right about the weather here in Austin next week. It’s supposed to be almost 90 here today and it’s fantastic.
Wildflowers are EVERYWHERE and the weather is warm enough to play outside, but not so hot you melt crossing the street.
I hope you have a great visit, and get to wear dresses the whole time. Now, please post more pictures of your pup. Thank you!!!!
People need to get a life and stop hating on yours! Abuse..REALLY PEOPLE??
You are hilarious! I never comment on blogs but had to on this. Love “haha jokes on you mother effer!” I think it is so funny people think that’s puppy abuse.
My english bulldog gets stuck under furniture.. he has done this since a puppy. He forces himself under the bed and then barks for help.. I just shake the treat container and he figures out quickly how to get out.
LOVE all your Jackson pics!!! and recipes
Hahaha! I love how you keep reiterating what to do with the tea!! I kept saying to myself, “really? the tea in the bag? She must mean something else, right?” Hahaha! Sounds fantastic and can’t wait to try!
It gets really weird when other dogs start to hump your dog! I remember the first time another dog humped my dog, Corrina, and she just stood there and let it happen! Somehow, I felt completely violated and disgusted and she just stood there like nothing happened lol. Hmmph.
Puppy humping before hormones kick in is definitely a play dominace thing, so it’s totally normal! I trained puppies (and was a doggie midwife!) when I worked at a vet clinic for 7 years. They all hump their siblings as young as 4 weeks (which is actually so so so cute), just as a “I’m totally in charge! King of the mountain!” Females will do it to other females too, as a show of dominance when they are older. 🙂
And I second more puppy pictures, please!!!
I love this shake and all it’s ingredients. I would never have guessed it had pumpkin. Yum!
Yum! This shake looks awesome!
Have fun at PaleoFX. If you go see Daniel Vitalis’s talk, please review it on the blog. I always love what he has to say 😉