Simple Creamy Cauliflower and Artichoke Soup

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Cauliflower is by far the most frustrating vegetable to work with. I might as well never clean the floors because there is going to be bits and pieces of that damn cauliflower everywhere I turn, every time I try to cut it. Am I just making excuses to why I don’t sweep the floor enough? Yeah. Definitely.

Ok, so people are freaking the eff out about this new iPhone software update. I don’t know why people are so upset. The only thing that has changed is how the text messages look. And where the control panel is. And how to search your phone. And how the weather looks on the screen. And the flashlight application. And the calendar. And how it shows me stocks. I don’t care about stocks. I should, shouldn’t I?

What I think that people should be complaining to Apple about is their damn headphones they give you when you purchase a phone. Hear me out. They have the most sophisticated phones in the world that can literally keep you sitting on your couch for hours, only being alerted by your own need to use the bathroom, but they can invent an ear phone that actually resembles an inner ear? Not even close. They give you head phones that are round and flat and fit into your ear worse than popcorn. Truly. I’d rather shove popcorn in my ear than their headphones. Popcorn wouldn’t be nearly as painful. If I’m going to pay for a phone that cost like, a kagillion dollars, I’m expecting headphones that mold to my ear and make love to it. But no, just pain. I guess I bought the phone anyways, so I’m just annoying at this point.

So I finally got snap chat. I gave in. I’ve always judged people for having it. Mostly because a certain someone I know that has it, gets dirty pictures on it. You dirty girls, you. And well, I don’t want to be that girl. And I definitely don’t want to receive dirty snap chats. Guys’ selfies in the mirror are never that interesting. But my friend sent me a snap chat of him dipping a cinnamon roll in frosting the other day, so I instantly downloaded it. Food porn is always worth the 10 second download. But now I don’t really know what to do with it. I’m not into it yet.

I don’t know what kind of animal is outside of my room, but it sounds like a mix between a squirrel and chicken. Picture that ugly b*tch.

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Simple Creamy Cauliflower and Artichoke Soup

  • Yield: 2 1x
Scale

Ingredients

  • 2 cups cauliflower, cut into florets
  • 12 cups vegetable stock (depending how thin or thick you want the soup)
  • 1/2 cup artichoke hearts (I bought canned artichoke hearts)
  • 1 tablespoon fresh basil, minced
  • salt and pepper, to taste
  • 12 cup shredded chicken, to garnish (I shredded a rotisserie chicken to make it easy)
  • 1/2 cup cooked bacon, roughly chopped, to garnish
  • olive oil, to garnish
  • hot sauce, to garnish

Instructions

  1. Steam 2 cups of cauliflower florets until soft.
  2. Place cauliflower in a Blendtec along with vegetable stock and puree until smooth using the soup button. If you do not have a Blendtec, use a food processor or blender.
  3. Add artichoke hearts, basil, and and a bit of salt and pepper. Puree once more to incorporate all ingredients.
  4. Cook bacon to preference then roughly chop it. I shredded a rotisserie chicken to make it easier.
  5. Place soup in a bowl, top with shredded chicken and bacon and add a few drops of olive oil and hot sauce on top of the soup.
  6. I found the best way to eat it was to mix it all up in a bowl mash. Wonderful.

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Oh, Hi! I’m Juli.

I’m a food hoarder. And a really bad dancer. If you don’t know me well, you will probably not understand my humor. Therefore, I apologize ahead of time. Thanks for listening to my ramblings of my ever-changing life and trusting my kitchen mishaps. Your trust in me is appreciated.

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58 thoughts on “Simple Creamy Cauliflower and Artichoke Soup”

  1. This looks awesome. I’ve been wanting a better thing to do with cauliflower because I, too, cannot seem to keep the tinies off the floor. Maybe I’ll steam the whole damn thing all at once. Also, you’re hilarious, though I’m sure you get that all the time! Thanks for the deliciousness.

  2. Thank you for making me feel better about the constant smattering of cauliflower on my floor. Def a love hate relationship with that veggie.

    1. Ahhhh Mindy was amazing last night! I mean I love me some Nick and Jess but Mindy was killing it with the one liners!
      “I am a tiny dainty women and these donuts are my lunch”
      I love her!

  3. I feel the same way about cauliflower! I LOVE eating it but HATE prepping it! I call it the packing peanuts of the food world. As far as sweeping the floors, that’s why I got a dog haha

  4. Cauliflower is such a bitch. That’s why I love getting the pre-cut florets from TJ’s…not super expensive compared to pre-cut veggies from other stores and I don’t have to worry about chopping it up and sending cauli dust throughout my kitchen.

    I LOVE YOUR BLOG. and you. in a totally non-creepy way

  5. I am so glad someone else hates those darn headphones. They hurt! And, I am a very sweaty girl so sweat gets into my ears (I know, gross) and the headphones won’t stay in. So annoying!

  6. I hate choppin up cauliflower!

    Cooked quinoa can be another difficult food to deal with too. Someone told me once that “Quinoa is the glitter of all food”. Those little grains get everywhere!

  7. i’m completely obsessed with cauliflower right now, so this soup is definitely going to be made this weekend!!! i love that it’s so simple too – thanks, juli b!

  8. Perfect timing…I have a head of cauliflower in the fridge that I really need to use before it goes bad. And canned artichokes in the pantry!

  9. Made this tonight! Doubled the recipe, used half fresh basil and half dried… it was a bit too much basil (but just a bit!). Husbando requested that I add some onion next time, so I’ll have to give that a shot!

    Husbando (who eats dairy) also added some shredded cheddar cheese to his bowl of soup… apparently it was amazing. I’m still sulking with jealousy. I hear that’s very healthy for a relationship…

    1. I agree with your husband, I added 1 sweet onion to a whole head of cauliflower and 2 crushed fresh garlic cloves – it really improved the taste!

  10. My God you are witty….one of your best pieces of writing ..EVER..

    It does not hurt that this recipe is calling my name…and palate-pleasing perfection for this changing-seasons time of year…The crisper evenings send me searching for fare that’s a bit more tummy-warming than the quick big-ass salad fare…Thanks for providing a solution!

    Loved Alanna’s coining of the term “cauli-floor”!!! I am adopting this word…and yes, Tiffany R…quinoa IS “the glitter of all food”…

    My husband chides me for “wasting time reading the comment section”…but on your blog..it’s practically mandatory..so many tiny “pearls” to gather…

    Postscript:…MADE it…but with only a chunk of leftover cauliflower…I added celery root to bring the white vegetable matter up to 2 cups…It was outrageously delicious! Thank you Julie.

    1. It’s all about the comments! I’ve gleaned quite a bit of information from Juli’s readers over the years. Not to mention the entertainment value. If you’re reading and commenting on this blog then we have something in common so of course I want to read what you have to say.

  11. Soooo making this tonight…..but since I have a ton of kohlrabi from my garden that has to be used up, I’ll be subbing that for the hearts (hope it works, the internet told me so…)

    Thanks for the recipe!!

  12. I’m just going to throw this out there… what do you think about adopting a dog that likes cauliflower? I love eating the vegetable, but like you… the bits go E.V.E.R.Y.W.H.E.R.E! My little pup cleans it up for me.
    You have been into “ears” lately, huh? If ‘the ear is the clitoris of the head,’ using iPhone ear buds should feel a lot better!

  13. Truer words have never been spoken about those damn iPhone headphones! I agree 200%! I’m glad to know it’s not just that I have weird shaped ears!

  14. Can I tell you how much I love you for integrating Ziplist with your sit. As a single mom of twins, constantly on the go, this really helps boost my productivity so I have time to cook

  15. This was amazing!!! My new favorite soup for sure. My husband really liked it too.
    The only thing I did different was I added some brown mushrooms to it, and I read the recipe wrong so I put the artichokes in after I had blended the cauliflower so they were chunky.

  16. All I can say is WOW! My wife and I are just entering the Paleo world, and found PaleOMG. This soup is amazing! I agree with and earlier post, I may reduce the fresh basil amount. I also plan on purée ing half the artichokes next time, and then chopping the rest….just for some texture. But my wife and I both LOVED this, and plan on making it again soon!

  17. I learned a little cauliflower trick at a cooking class once. Cut it it into thick slices like a loaf of bread instead of into florets. Makes much less of a mess. Not sure if that makes it harder to fit in a steamer but it definitely works amazing for oven-roasting. You can coat it with spices/oil more easily and flip it halfway through. When the instructor showed us the whole class went “Ahhhh!” Seemed so obvious but no one had ever done it.

  18. Made this over the weekend – along with the pumpkin donuts, that unfortunately didn’t work out well at all, but now I have these adorable pumpkin muffins I’ve been eating all week instead – but anyway, the soup = AMAZING. Super easy and the flavor the basil and bacon bring is superb. Definitely working this into my regular repertoire of meals!

  19. I made this last night with a few additions. I added onions and garlic (that I sauteed in bacon fat), Italian parsley and a tiny squeeze of fresh lemon juice. This was delicious! Thank you so much for the recipe!!

  20. We almost always roast our cauliflower, so I just cut it up on the baking pan. That way all the little bits stay put. Genius, I know.

  21. I made this a couple weeks ago and it was freakin’ delicious. This is the third of your recipes I’ve tried so far and I love them all! Thank you!

  22. Made it last night and ate today for lunch & I LOVED IT. Not salty like canned soup..so fresh and creamy. Thanks so much!

  23. This soup is fan-freaking-tastic. I roasted the cauliflower with garlic and cumin and had to stop myself from eating that straight from the pan. I have been eating paleo for about 8 months now and a lot of that is thanks to you. I have tried many recipes from different websites but yours are absolutely the best. I also made the shredded pork stew and the maple pecan butternut squash with bacon. The flavor profiles are just awesome. Please don’t ever stop coming up with recipes.

  24. Finally got an iPhone myself and my first thought was “seriously? this is what I get for earbuds?” Oh well…I bought a pair of over the ear ones that faintly resemble Mr. Spock’s ears, but at least they stay in. Anyway, great recipe and I’m looking forward to trying it next week!

  25. I’m eating this right now & it’s delish! Instead of getting out the steamer & blender, I just tossed everything (except the “toppings”) into a pot, simmered it until the cauli was cooked thorugh & then let my immersion blender do the heavy lifting. My husband called it lazy. I called it genius.

  26. So I just made this on Monday to have for the week. Just getting to taste it today for my work lunch. It tastes like a soup special you’d get from a fancy restaurant. It is amazing! (not surprisingly, as your recipes typically are!)

  27. OMG!!! This soup is absolutely AMAZING!! It was extremely fast, flavorful, and easy! I added sun dried tomatoes….which added a little extra bold flavor! Can’t wait to make again! So good!!

  28. OMG yes the cauliflower is always on the damn floor and when you try to clean it up off the counter forget it. I just made a cauliflower soup today and posted it to my blog, this one looks fantastic I must try it. As far as snapchat goes I totally get it, I am constantly sending out foodporn chats to my closest peeps! Love it 🙂

  29. You just saved me. This cauliflower soup was amazing and fill the bill for the old 10 day detox diet I’m on. Used chicken stock and added a little olive oil. Super duper effing good! When’s your cookbook coming out again? Not soon enough!

  30. Christy Honeycutt

    Oh Em Ghee!!! My family went nuts over this and that includes 14 & 18 year old boys who like salad drenched in Ranch and that’s about it. I added smoked paprika and some additional roasted cauliflower from the night before. Sprinkled bacon and Frank’s hot sauce on top. Delish!! This goes in one of our many regular dishes from your site. We love so many of them!

  31. Holy Head of Cauliflower Batman…this recipe rocks the house. Was searching the internet to find a Paleo recipe for a rainy afternoon after a morning run and this was PERFECT…Your recipes never disappoint and I look forward to using them as I train for multiple endurance running races 🙂 Thanks!!

  32. I am REALLY excited to make this. I recently figured out I am allergic to dairy (not lactose intolerant), good news is that means I don’t have asthma or acid reflux. Bad new is, I LOVE milk, cheese, creamy foods, you name it. This has got to be good with the bacon and chicken!

  33. Juli, I am doing the 21 DSD and hope to follow a Paleo diet after that, and I have to say that finding your blog made me soooooo happy! You have posted so many delicious-looking recipes and your blog entries are really entertaining! I made this cauliflower and artichoke soup last weekend and it was fantastic! Can’t wait to try all the rest!!!

  34. So I know is recipe is “older,” but damn is it good! Had a ton of frozen cauliflower I wanted to use up, so I roasted it in the oven with onion. Put a chicken breast with broth in the slow cooker. Blended the cauliflower, broth, and veggies. Added garlic, shredded chicken, and bacon. SO STINKING GOOD! Hits the spot on cold days for sure. Thank you!!!!

  35. Thanks for giving me a way to consume the overcooked artichokes my family was running from (Instant Pot fail). I used the hearts and scraped both ends of the leaves with a spoon. Worked great.

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