I hate chicken. I really do. The only time I like chicken is when it’s shredded and mixed with lots of juices. And in an arepa. Truth. I even made these stuffed chicken breasts, and even though they tasted great and the chicken was cooked perfectly, I still didn’t want to eat it. Because chicken sucks and is boring. Don’t fight me on this one, please. I will not budge. I’m really selling you on this recipe, huh?

I’ve been looking into the blood type diet a bit. Mostly just what kinds of meats are better choices for my blood type. And well, white meats and fish are suppose to be better for my blood type. Red meats, pork, and anything that has delicious flavor to it, is a no no. Which is something I’m not a huge fan of. I’m just not into the fact that I may have to cut off all happiness in my diet. Just ain’t gonna work for me. It just ain’t.

I hate something else. Phone issues. They are just THE WORST. I need an iphone. I got with the 21st century and got a Mac, now I need to one up myself and get an iphone. This phone of mine has broken 3 times. Meaning I’ve had 3 different phones, same style, but brand new. To be fair, I drunkenly dropped it in the toilet one of the times, but the other two were not my fault. I swear, phones are made to break within months, then you have to buy a new one, keeping the phone industry booming. Conspiracy? Maybe, but I’m sticking with that belief.

Anywho, I don’t have a phone right now. I’m communicating via Facebook and Gmail at this time, which sucks because I hate both of those things. And writing back to anyone. A land line would be quite nice right now. Not that it would be helpful since I have only 3 numbers in this world memorized, one being my own. But the biggest issue with having phone problems is actually going to the phone store to get the problem fixed. This is how my phone scenario played out yesterday:

Since it wouldn’t turn on when I woke up, as I drove to the phone store, I kept looking down to see if it was charging in my car charger. This caused me to get honked at, at least three times in 15 minutes. Three times. I don’t think I’ve been honked at three times in my life. That was a lie. Anywho, since I was freaking out, I got to the phone store 20 minutes early. And since my phone wasn’t working, I didn’t exactly have anything to do. So I read tax paperwork. That was a blast. After the words began to become unreadable blurbs, I moved onto lotioning my cuticles. This isn’t something I EVER do. I could give a f*ck about my nails, especially my nail beds. I don’t paint them, I don’t go to the nail salon. I cut them so they don’t catch on my clothes. They serve the purpose of picking my nose, and that’s it. So while I lotioned my hands, I gave people dirty looks as they pulled up. You know everyone who pulls up before a store opens is trying to get in there first, because if you don’t, it’s most likely going to be a 15 minute wait automatically. Which makes absolutely no sense. But whatever. So as soon as the doors opened, I literally sprinted to the door. I’m not joking. And met with a woman for 15 minutes who told me they would overnight me a phone.

Ok so cool, that’s rad and all that I’ll have a phone by tomorrow, but what do I do right now? What do I do tomorrow morning when I have to wake up at 5am? Use a real alarm? I don’t have one of those. Do they even sell those anymore? Because if they do, I want one that will play Beyonce when I wake up so I’m instantly in a better mood.

On a high note, I think I have pink eye. Cooooooooool. Getting a cold has proved to be one hell of a pain in the ass. And don’t tell me someone farted on my pillow. You’re not original.

4.9 from 18 reviews

Simple Bacon and Spinach Stuffed Chicken
Prep time: 
Cook time: 
Total time: 

Serves: 4

  • 4 chicken breasts, butterflied and pounded flat
  • 6-8 ounces of button mushrooms, roughly chopped
  • 5 strips of bacon
  • 4-5 cups fresh spinach
  • 2 garlic cloves, minced
  • salt and pepper, to taste

  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Butterfly your chicken. I’m not totally sure how to butterfly a chicken breast but I cut mine in half, then placed plastic wrap on top of the chicken and pounded it until it was flat. Do that, it works.
  3. Then place a large skillet over medium-high heat.
  4. Add the five strips of bacon and cook on both sides until crispy, then place bacon on a paper towel to soak up the excess fat. When cooled, dice up the bacon.
  5. Pour out the excess fat from the bacon, leaving behind about 3 tablespoons in the pan.
  6. While the pan is still over medium-high, toss in the garlic cloves then add diced mushrooms.
  7. Sprinkle in a bit of salt and pepper on the mushrooms.
  8. Once mushrooms have begun to soften, add the spinach and a bit more salt and pepper.
  9. Cover and let steam until spinach has begun to wilt. When the spinach has wilted, remove the pan from heat and add in diced bacon. Mix with mushrooms and spinach until well combined.
  10. Place mixture into the middle of your butterflied chicken, fold chicken over to make a little “pocket” and use a two toothpicks to keep it closed while cooking.
  11. Place stuffed chicken breasts on a parchment lined baking sheet and put in oven to bake for 18-20 minutes or until there is no longer pink in the chicken. The time will range depending on how thin you pound the chicken. It may take a bit longer.
  12. Love moist chicken. Don’t overcook it, don’t you do it!
  13. Don’t eat the toothpick. Duh.