I’m mad. Like, really f*cking mad. Ok, that’s a lie, I don’t really get mad, I just get sad. So, I’m really f*cking sad. My face was finally getting better, finally looking like something was changing and my face was starting to play nice, but NO. No, no,no. It ain’t playin’ nice no mo’. My face has freaked out. Like OMG Ihateyousomuchjuli. Iwantyoutostaysingleforever. Andidefinitelydontwantanyonetofindyouattractive. Ever.

You, my face, are a straight up b*tch.

Ugh, I’m going to get so many emails about my dirty mouth now. I’ll save you the time…please don’t send them.

Anywho, I’m having one of those days of feeling absolutely hopeless. I don’t know what to do. I clean up my diet and it gets a little bit better, then it goes back to normal. I change up my face cleansing routine and it gets a little better, then goes back to normal. I get off birth control, I stay on birth control. I take fish oil, I don’t take fish oil. I eat more fat, I eat less fat. I don’t eat dark chocolate, I do eat dark chocolate. I get facials, I don’t get facials. You get what I’m throwin’ out? I try everything, but in the end my face has full control, and I am left staring in the mirror with tears in my eyes, choking back the egg of frustration that sits in my throat.

Just today, I started taking the probiotic saccharomyce boulardii which was recommended by Liz of Cave Girl Eats. I also am getting cod liver oil soon to start trying that as well. And making sure all sugar and nuts are cut from my diet. It’s just so annoying that my mind has to be filled with thoughts of how ugly I am or how I wish I could improve my skin. That’s dumb. It should be filled with cookbook thoughts, and Christmas gift thoughts, and food thoughts. But no, the face has won.

So here’s my question out of utter frustration and anguish…do I try acutane? Do I face the fact that I may be incredibly depressed, moody, and upset for months because of the drug? Do I face the fact that I may have to take the drug even though my face and other body parts will literally dry up and peel off? Do I face the fact that it may not even work? I don’t know what to do, but I’m obviously upset enough to blab all about it and want some of your advice. So, advise me.

On a more positive note, you NEED to try these muffins. They are DELICIOUS.

4.6 from 21 reviews

Morning Glory Muffins (nut free option)
 
Serves: 9
Ingredients
  • 1 apple, peeled and cored, shredded
  • 1 large carrot, peeled
  • ½ cup sunflower seed butter
  • 1 cup pepitas
  • 3 eggs, whisked
  • ½ cup Coconut Oil, melted
  • ¼ cup raisins
  • ¼ cup pecans, roughly chopped (optional for nut free version)
  • 1 tablespoon cinnamon
  • 1 tablespoon raw honey
  • ¼ teaspoon baking soda
  • pinch of salt
Instructions
  1. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Now add your pepitas to a small saucepan over medium heat with a tablespoon of fat. I used coconut oil.
  3. Cook for 3-5 minutes, moving around lots so they don’t burn and so they cook on all sides.
  4. While your pepitas are roasting, add your apple and carrot to your food processor with the shredding attachment. If you don’t have a food processor, use a grater to shred your apple and carrot.
  5. Add your apple and carrot to a bowl along with your sunflower seed butter and rinse out your food processor bowl.
  6. Then add your roasted pepitas to the food processor and puree until you get a flour/meal.
  7. Then add your pepita flour, eggs, coconut oil, honey, raisins, pecans, cinnamon, salt, and baking soda. Mix well.
  8. Pour your batter into 9 FULL muffins tins. I lined my muffins tin with silicone muffin liners but paper would do just fine.
  9. Bake for 25-30 minutes until cooked through.
  10. Let cool slightly, but eat warm, because they are the best that way.