Baby Pizza Bites

What a stupid name.

These bite size morsels of happiness are divine. And a perfect party platter appetizer. I ate them as a meal because I don’t like social situations. But if you like parties, and people, you should totally make these.

My allergies have become a sh*tshow. Even more of a sh*tshow than I was on Saturday at the bar. You see, I babysat a dog part of Saturday and for some reason, she has become the reason I can’t even think. I’m in a haze. She was in my car that day so every time I get in my car now, I can’t stop sneezing. I can’t breathe either. Am I dying? No. I just now know I cannot ever own a golden retriever. Ever. I would be in constant stuffy nose pain. Too bad. She was probably the sweetest dog I’ve ever met.

Thank god I lost my sense of smell though. I cleaned out about 10 pieces of tupperware from our fridge yesterday. 3 girls + 1 household = grosseness. I saw black mold. I saw green mold. I saw fuzzy mold. I saw creamy mold. Yeah, I just said creamy. Cantaloupe molding = creamy mold. I saw it with my own eyes. When sh*t gets that nasty in tupperware, I usually just throw it out. But tupperware is expensive. And I’m poor.

Guess what I’m doing?! Ok so since I’ve cut out nuts for a couple weeks now, I’ve decided to try the 21 day sugar detox by Balanced Bites. Why not? I love her and her site, so might as well trust her right!? Well, that’s not really why I’m doing it. It’s more to see if I can cut the sugar cravings. I craved nuts like crazy (go on and giggle, you’re hilarious) when I ate them a bunch, but now I don’t even think about them. Same thing with the sweets. I crave them because I have them too much. So I’m cutting out all sugars, including fruit for the next 21 days. I’ve gotten through one day so far and I haven’t fallen off the wagon! NBD. I am honestly doing this to just be healthier. I don’t expect or really want to lose weight, I just want to feel in control and not really crave sweets. What I do expect though, is to be taller, prettier, and extremely hilarious when I’m done with these 21 days. If that doesn’t happen, I’ll be eating a bag of chocolate chips every night for 21 days to make up for the bullsh*t that I pushed upon myself and the 21 days of happiness I missed out on. Nuts AND fruit?! What the hell am I going to cook this weekend when I’m not out at the bars?! Blasphemy.

I miss bananas.


  • Prep Time: 5 mins
  • Cook Time: 10 mins
  • Total Time: 15 minutes


  • 12 button mushrooms, wiped of any dirt and stems removed
  • 1/2lb italian sausage
  • 1 egg white
  • 1/41/2 cup pizza sauce or no sugar added marinara sauce


  1. Turn on your grill so it’s hot. Make sense.
  2. Wipe down your mushrooms and remove stems. Then place them stem side up on a plate.
  3. Throw your italian sausage in a bowl along with your egg white. Use your hands to combine it all together.
  4. Then make tablespoon size balls of the meat mixture and plop them into the cap of the mushrooms.
  5. Place on top rack of grill and cook for about 8-10 minutes or until sausage is cooked through.
  6. Top each mushroom and sausage cap with either hot or cold pizza/marinara sauce!
  7. Stick a toothpick in it and EAT IT. Careful, these b*tches get wicked hot.

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upright baby
plethora of babies
holdin the baby
baby fell down. ok i’m kidding, i pushed it.

Oh, Hi! I’m Juli.

I’m a food hoarder. And a really bad dancer. If you don’t know me well, you will probably not understand my humor. Therefore, I apologize ahead of time. Thanks for listening to my ramblings of my ever-changing life and trusting my kitchen mishaps. Your trust in me is appreciated.


54 thoughts on “Baby Pizza Bites”

  1. These look like such a tasty snack! Do you watch fat intake much? I’m transitioning into paleo and am worried about consuming too much what with all the meat and coconut milk and such. Thanks for all the inspirations!

    1. Not a ton Kristen. On rest days I tend to not eat as many carbs and as much fat. If you are working out, it’s not something to worry about as much, but if not, try to stick with the leaner meats and just make sure you’re not just consuming entire cans of coconut milk each day 🙂

    2. Kristen – I totally understand your fear. When I started paleo it took me a long time to wrap my mind around all the fat intake. My poor parents are still convinced I’m one piece of bacon away from a heart attack.

      We’re conditioned to think that the only way we’ll lose weight/be healthy is by eating dry brown rice and egg whites… lies! 🙂 When you’re first starting out, I’d recommend watching your carb intake more than your fat. Don’t go eatin’ a stick of butter with every meal, but try not to worry about it. That fat is what will keep you satiated as you pare down on carb sources like bread, pasta, potatoes, etc. Once you get more comfortable with eating paleo in general, you can tinker with your fat/carb/protein intakes to figure out what works best for you. Good luck!

      1. Thank you ladies!! I’m planning on starting crossfit in the next couple weeks and am trying to read up a bit so I’m prepared 🙂

      2. For the fellow science nerds, or for anyone who has a family that somehow think fat is a martian invasion of your coronary arteries. There is a pretty good meta-analysis from 2009 ( that shows basically zero correlation between saturated fat intake and coronary artery disease. I would love to go into the organic chemistry of why its that way, but Juli hates science and i don’t want to get banned, lol

  2. What if you don’t have a grill? I’m a poor college student and if they find a grill in my apartment they fine me….a lot. I have an oven though!

  3. oh man good luck with the detox, not sure I could go without the fruit since its really my main carb source. I’ve seriously been thinking of gong with nuts though… I go through more than a jar of almond butter a week and its just ridiculous. I tried yesterday but just ate a ton of ghee on everything instead hah.

  4. Good luck with your detox! I started a Whole30 yesterday – trying to get a handle on my sugar addiction as well. Saw my husband eating EnjoyLife chocolate chips last night and I thought I was going to cut a bitch.

  5. Good luck with the detox. That’s funny because I just started yesterday too. I’m keeping a little journal of what I eat (not quantity). Summer is not a swell time for a fruit detox since I just got pints of blueberries for 99 cents.

  6. Looks yummy! Can’t wait to try these. BTW, Tupperware has a lifetime guarantee so put them in the sun or place newspaper in them to take out any odor after you wash them. If that does not work, then ask a rep to replace them. 🙂 I can’t imagine life without Tupperware since it is better on the environment then non-recycleable items (and I was a TPWR rep to support my habit! 🙂
    Good luck on the 21 day; haven’t gotten up the nerve to try it yet (choc & fruit, crazy!!) so let us know how it goes!

  7. Allergies, no nuts?, no sugars? and basically no alcohol?!!! Girl, I hope that at least you’re having crazy amounts of wild sex because you are my idol!. Good luck in your 21 days.

  8. These look great and good luck on the detox. I always cave at day 6. Stupid sugar. I wish I had your willpower.

  9. Oh these look amazing! Great Idea, I might have to add a black olive inside the mushroom cap under the sausage to make them even more pizza like! I am totally making these! Are you going to write about your sugar detox, I would love to hear about it. Something I have always wanted to do but never had the guts to do it.

  10. I’ve done the sugar detox–it was crazy hard, but it definitely helped kill some of my sweet toothiness. I hope you can come up with lots of detox-friendly recipes because I really need some more 🙂 i highly recommend trying the zuccini cakes.

    I ate nuts while on my detox.

    Oh, and dairy too because I’m not very hardcore.

  11. Gosh that sugar detox sounds like something I need to do. So maybe I need to consume all that there is in the house so it’s no longer there. I CAN’T QUIT SWEETS! But maybe it is like you said, you eat it so much that you always want it. If I can get through WOD’s I should be able to do it too.

  12. Since my body sucks at handling blood sugar and my love handles explode if I smell a cookie, I’ve cut out almost all sugar and fruit as well (for the time being). Trust me, if you load up on protein and fat, you’ll be good to go! I try for about .8g of protein per lb. of body weight and I’m so satiated all the time, it really helps with sugar cravings. When I’m really desperate, I’ll mix some cinnamon into canned coconut milk and eat that sh*t like pudding. It helps.

    You’ll do great!

  13. Yay these look so yummy! And I was trying to think of some sort of small protein addition for tonight’s dinner since I don’t have enough chicken breasts at home to fill my husband and still have leftovers for lunch 🙂 These will be perfect!

  14. Hats off to you for giving up fruit; that would be a b*tch for me. Someone left 70+ bananas at work on Friday and I took 56 of them home, chopped them up, and put them in the freezer. I had banana “ice-cream” with almond butter and coconut milk on Saturday and ate (no kidding) probably 10 bananas on Sunday after a 2.5 hour endurance workout…Frozen banana bites are addicting.

  15. Day 3 of detox for me! I became way too comfortable with dried fruit! When I found a dried blueberry in my bra, I knew I had a problem! And of course my coworker brings me watermelon that just smells out of this world. Will have to sneak it home to the hubby. Gotta quit being so damm nice at work! Too many treats for me!

  16. These look great. I am going to Puerto Vallarta in 18 days so I decided today that I am doing a 18 day sugar detox. It is seriously my enemy (and best buddy when its in my mouth!). So I look forward to your recipes in the next coming 21 days to help out. I am going to make these tonght, but in the oven. Hope that works okay! Any suggestions for a good treat around 7:30pm when the cravings go absolutely crazy? I’ve been doing strict paleo for about 2 months now, except the treats! Damn the treats!

  17. Good luck with your sugar detox! I tried to go a whole week last week without munching on chocolate chips. I made it, and didn’t really miss them, but those little boogers were calling my name yesterday and I cracked. You inspired me to cut way back on my nut consumption, and I noticed that without chocolate chips and gobs of nuts, my skin was a lot clearer.

  18. You are my idol. I hope to meet you if i am ever in good ol’ Colorado! I swear I’m not a stalker, just a huge fan.

  19. Making these tonight! For those worried about too much fat…I’ve been mostly paleo for close to a month and dropped six pounds. Focus on quality protein. Nuts aren’t huge in my diet, but I may have a slight avocado problem. Also feeling stronger too.

  20. So…I’m kinda banned from using our family’s outdoor kitchen (long story), but I was wondering if I could make these in an oven? Maybe say using the broiler feature?

    *keeping fingers crossed that the answer is yes. O, and then provide me with the instructions*

  21. These look yummy. And I am having major guilt right now because I just ate a banana. Dumb. At least it wasn’t a freaking brownie or piece of cheesecake.

  22. I’ve done the detox twice (levels 1 and 2), and am now a moderator for the FB page. The first few days are definitely the roughest, but there is still so much delicious food you can enjoy. Just keep those choco-chips out of the house–those little demons will mess you up! Best of luck! And your “babies” look delicious! I’ll be eating some soon…

  23. I did the detox and it makes you feel and look awesome. I think I needed a longer detox because I have a huge sweet tooth and eat too many paleo treats and lots of fruit. Once I was off it, I reverted back to my old ways (not unhealthy, but higher in carbs). I think I’ll try Whole 30 next, or maybe a Whole60 to get rid of my habit of wanting something sweet after meals. Good luck with your detox. You will love the results!

  24. Have you ever tried L-Glutamine for sugar cravings? I followed Julia Ross’s Diet Cure protocol (for ED/mood disorder recovery, but it also works for, well, anything balance-related). Instantly zaps those cravings when I am overworked/overtired/nutrient depleted. Those are the only times I get cravings.

  25. Oh, and I am on day 7 of strict paleo and no sugar. Its been pretty good, I’ve been organized with having lots of protein and veg prepared. Olives and pickles have been great snacks!

  26. I’ve loved all your recipes so far, but I must say your blog is one of the few I actually take the time to read the post and enjoy it instead of just skipping to the recipe. =]

  27. Made this for the first time last night for a Paleo potluck at our box and they were a hit! My new go to appetizer recipe! Thanks for another great recipe!

  28. These were so yummy! Baked in the oven but took like 20 mins at 375 for me. Then added mozz cheese on top for 5 more mins, and put marinara on side for dipping. Delicious, thanks!

  29. I left the recipe open and then didn’t look at it, I thought it said 1/4 of sausage forgot the egg whites but guess what they turned out divine. I did them in the oven 375 20 minutes took them out put sauce on top and then a tiny bit of parmesan cheese on top then broiled for a minute. I ate the whole thing so maybe it was good I only used 1/4 pound of sausage. I love your recipes, every single one that I have tried. Thank you so much. It doesn’t hurt that you are funny either. I laugh every day I read your blog.

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