Bacon Braised Collard Greens

So here’s the thing…I never buy collard greens. Like, ever. I don’t know why, I guess there are just other greens that interest me more. BUT, after eating at 24Diner in Austin and holding back from getting fries, I ordered their bacon braised collard greens and I was absolutely blown away with how good it was. Seriously blow away. And they give you the biggest heap full that you are left wanting to eat more, but don’t have any room for it. It was so damn good. Which inspired me to buy some collard greens and go at it myself. I can’t say it’s as good, but I’ll say it’s as good. Wait, what?!?

Moving on. If you know me well or if you barely know me at all, you know I hate sports. I hate that people get obsessed with them and hate that people hate other people because they like a different team. I hate when people talk sh*t to others and scream *WHORE* while walking through the street with the opposing teams shirt on. Yes, that literally happened to me. I was walking to the CU vs. CSU game in Boulder one year when I was in college and had a guy yell whore at me because I was a Ram and not a Buff. I think sports sh*t is flat out whacko. How do people put so much energy into something they aren’t even a part of? You’re yelling obscenities at a player who you will never even meet face to face and who makes about 2o3249208 million more a year than you? Real cool, big guy.

Ok, but back to my point. I’m getting distracted. Ok, so I’m going to a wedding on Saturday night for one of my girlfriends. Of course, all the guys are pooping their pants about watching the Mayweather vs Pacquiao fight that night so the bride being the great person she is, ordered it for all the tv’s at the reception. She’s a kind woman. When my fiancé started talking about it the other night, I just rolled my eyes. Him being intent on changing my perception of the fight, he put on the HBO special about the 7 years leading up to this fight. He knows that if I have a backstory and can connect with the athlete, I’ll be more interested. I’m a sucker for inspirational stories. Man, was he right. I’m pumped for this fight now. It’s all I keep talking to people about. Like one of those crazy people I just talked about. But can someone please explain to me why anyone would want Mayweather to win?? Explain it to me. Because from what I’ve seen, he’s incredibly rude, arrogant and then I just found out he had domestic violence charges from his ex-wife. WTFWTF. One of the greatest fighters in the world who has knocked people out actually hit his wife. Why would anyone want that terrible man to win? Man, I’m so jazzed about this right now. He’s just the worst.

Speaking of weddings, I have 3 to go to this summer and still haven’t planned any of our own. We were in the planning process, decided on Jamaica, decided on a hotel, changed our mind about the date then BOOM, a house came up and all of our money was gone. So booking the hotel in Jamaica right now just isn’t happening. Our friends keep asking for dates so they can save up or I guess book a babysitter a year ahead of time, but we still know nothing. And honestly, I don’t know when the hell we will be able to afford it with trying to decorate the house. Is this why people get married THEN buy a house? So they put couches and dining tables and rugs on their registry? Those people are smart. HOW ARE RUGS $400??? YOU WALK ON THEM!!!! Blasphemy, I tell you.

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Bacon Braised Collard Greens

  • Yield: 3 1x

Ingredients

Scale
  • 1/2 pound bacon, diced
  • 5 garlic cloves, smashed and thinly sliced
  • 2 shallots, thinly sliced
  • 2 large bunches of collard greens, stems removed and roughly chopped
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons fine sea salt
  • 2 cups chicken stock
  • 1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
  • 2 bay leaves

Instructions

  1. Place a large dutch oven over medium heat. Add bacon and cook until crispy. Remove with a slotted spoon and set aside on a paper towel to soak up excess fat.
  2. Place garlic and shallots in the dutch oven and scrap the bottom with a wooden spoon. Cook for about 10 minutes, until fragrant and browned.
  3. Add greens along with chopped bacon, salt, chicken stock, balsamic vinegar, and bay leaves. Mix to combine.
  4. Cover and let cook for 30 minutes.
  5. Remove lid and let cook for another 10 minutes to help the liquid evaporate before serving.

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Oh, Hi! I’m Juli.

I’m a food hoarder. And a really bad dancer. If you don’t know me well, you will probably not understand my humor. Therefore, I apologize ahead of time. Thanks for listening to my ramblings of my ever-changing life and trusting my kitchen mishaps. Your trust in me is appreciated.

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44 thoughts on “Bacon Braised Collard Greens”

  1. This. Looks. So. Good. I make a mix of collards, mustard, turnip greens and rainbow chard each week, but never thought to add bacon. Totally doing this!! PS, greens are loaded with vitamins!

  2. Your thoughts on sports read my mind to a T. The funny thing is (and I’m sure you’ve experienced this) people automatically think I am a die hard fan of “X” team because I’m fairly athletic. It’s always awkward when I say, well I like playing sports and watching sports, but I don’t give a *uck about who it is on the screen that were watching…Id rather play myself.
    That being said, I agree, if you understand the background of an athlete, it makes it more compelling/interesting.
    Can’t wait to try this recipe, haven’t been disappointed with one of your recipes yet!!

  3. Even though this post was kind of random, it wound up being one of my favorite ones ever! I just laughed out loud / almost spit coffee on my keyboard several times. Thank you for always entertaining me / making me laugh with your rambling antics. Just the way it goes in my own head too 🙂

  4. I’m with you. I don’t even like boxing, but I’ve never wanted someone to lose as badly as I want Mayweather to lose.

  5. Juli, seriously check out overstock.com for house stuff. I was skeptical at first about buying stuff I haven’t seen in person but got a GORGEOUS rug and tufted head board for crazy reasonable prices. And free shipping. Winning!

  6. Have you decided on a new cover photo for your cookbook yet?! I’m so sad you won’t be wearing that dress on it…I was watching Pretty Little Liars a few weeks ago and Lucy Hale was wearing that exact same dress. I was like, “Omg i know that dress!!” haha!

    PS- this recipe sounds baller. I’m from Alabama, so this is right up my alley. 🙂

    1. i haven’t decided yet! i like both cover shots now but we haven’t got the design quite perfect yet for the new shot so we will have to see!

  7. I have only made collard greens once and they were horrible. So horrible, that I haven’t made them since. This recipe is just what I need to give them a second chance. Maybe I’ll be a convert… Thanks!

  8. Can I just be practical here? Have your wedding locally. Your friends will thank you. Also, it’ll be all around cheaper. Trust me, I know from experience that long distance planning is not easy. Save Jamaica for your honeymoon. Or don’t people do those anymore?

  9. Rugs are crazy expensive! My thoughts were the same as yours too…. I just put it on the floor and that’s it… why does it cost $2,000. Home Ownership is a real blast. 🙂

  10. We were in the same situation as you – we bought a house and didn’t have any money left for a wedding! After a lot of back and forth, we decided to keep getting married super simple – we got married at the courthouse with our closest friends and family members present and then went out and had a posh dinner afterwards. We had the best time and spent less than $1,000 (that’s including the marriage license & the judge). I have no regrets at keeping it intimate. We decided to hold off on a honeymoon for the time being and use any extra money for things for the house. Again – no regrets!

  11. I love your random posts and your awesome recipes! The recipes are always simple and sooo good! I don’t have a dutch oven. What would you suggest to use instead? Can’t wait to try this!

  12. This recipe looks amazing! I just wanted to let you know your “print recipe” thing doesn’t have a picture on the page that prints out.
    It looks like it will but then nothing on the PDF that pops up.
    George’s blog has the pictures that print so i just wanted to mention it in case it’s a glitch you didn’t know about. 🙂

  13. I rarely if ever buy collards. Since relocating from NY to SC I grow my own. Had I known about them in NY , I probably could have grown them there. They grow like weeds here. They are a cool weather green. I let a few go to seed then they reseed themselves all over my garden.

  14. Check out rugsusa.com They always have awesome sales and have every style/color you could imagine. We just ordered a rug from there and it’s great quality.

  15. i really like these recipe on your page :)keep it up !
    I was 70 kg at first and now i am 55Kg, 5 kg to go.
    I always support your recipies with 1000 paleo recipes that i recently read and buy from gamercook.com

  16. Ok – this recipie looks awesome and can’t wait to try it. So glad that you brought up the domestic violence charges against Floyd and that we should not be supporting this fight because of his behavior. Finally it’s great to find another Juli with no “e”. 😉

    1. i just don’t understand how that’s never brought up or talked about. it makes no sense! yay, love when i see that spelling!

  17. OMG, these were delicious. I actually didn’t make them with collard greens though. I had mustard greens and kale in the fridge so I used those. I will never cook greens any other way again! Thanks!

  18. This was my first time having collard greens and I really liked this dish! Next time I will add less salt but I’m thinking this will become one of my regular side dishes 🙂

  19. Can’t wait to make this!! Love your stuff. Make the herb chicken burgers with Carmelized onions a lot. No interest in the fight dude. They’re both way past their peaks. May weather not a nice guy.

    The horse race, that was fun. The horses could be treated better though. Oh well.

  20. I’m so glad I saw this recipe! I just bought collard greens for a recipe but it only called for 5 leaves. I was wondering what to do with the rest, and this is the perfect solution!

  21. This recipe. OMG indeed. Currently eating them with some delicious Paleo meatloaf. Perfect meal for this raining CO day. Thanks for reminding me that collard greens are delicious!

  22. Great recipe no doubt with collard greens or mustard greens. Btw, rants about sports fanatics are no more entertaining than rants by sports fanatics.

  23. Made the greens last night. We love ’em (including my beautiful native Floridian wife). Will definitely make ’em again!

  24. Made the collard greens last night … super tasty! The only part I didn’t like, was cleaning them. 🙁 Had them with some tuscan pork chops.

  25. Love collard greens, and these sound nice. Whatever – Darling: buy yourself a $1000 rug, and you will never have to worry about it again, nor will you have to buy another one in your lifetime, or your children’s lifetimes. THAT’S why rugs cost $400, so you can be silly enough to buy 6 of them, instead of one good one. Get a Persian rug. Stop talking. Done. You’re welcome.

  26. I know this is an older post, but I just tried the greens (one who has also never gravitated toward them), and I loved them! A new staple to my menu for sure.

  27. I am a die-hard, true-blue Mayweather fan and I will forever applaud his abilities as the number 1 fighter in the world. He has attitude and an ego, sure … but he backs that up! He also has to be overly confident (to the point where it’s annoying to us mere mortals) for a couple of reasons:

    1) he’s a boxer and if he’s not 130% mentally strong ad confident, he will get his arse kicked. As an amateur fighter myself, I can tell you how scary it is to step into the ring and face a skilled opponent whose sole objective is to take your head off. At that moment, no one can help you and no one can believe in you but you. So yeah, you better be a cocky son of a ___ if you want to take that into the ring and survive

    2) he’s a businessman. he knows that swag and attitude sells tickets and gets people worked up. he knows that the sport of boxing is grueling and costly and at the end of the day, he only has so many fighting days left. he’s a smart businessman who wants to drive up emotions from fans and people so that creates demand for him.

    I don’t condone whatever went down with him and his baby mama but I also don’t know what the situation was that caused it. I do know that the world seems to be able to forgive Michael Vick for harming innocent dogs and basically forcing them to fight to the death… no one seems to mind watching him play. In my eyes, Mayweather is certainly no worst than that guy. Dogs are purely innocent … like babies … so anyone who can do such damage and derive pleasure from it is truly despicable.

    1. you’re comparing apples to apples. people who hurt women, children or animals are all around bad people, no matter the situation. you’re talking to the wrong person because i’m not part of the “whole world” who has forgiven Vick. i still think he’s a bad human being.

  28. Julie! You gotta drag this one back up to everyone’s attention. I made it today, and it is just fantastic. Everyone needs this recipe for the odd times they make collards!

    1. you could definitely make it in a normal pot, the dutch oven just regulates the temperature better. i’m sure they could also be made in an instant pot, i just haven’t tried it that way so i can’t give you instructions sadly

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