So here’s the thing…I never buy collard greens. Like, ever. I don’t know why, I guess there are just other greens that interest me more. BUT, after eating at 24Diner in Austin and holding back from getting fries, I ordered their bacon braised collard greens and I was absolutely blown away with how good it was. Seriously blow away. And they give you the biggest heap full that you are left wanting to eat more, but don’t have any room for it. It was so damn good. Which inspired me to buy some collard greens and go at it myself. I can’t say it’s as good, but I’ll say it’s as good. Wait, what?!?

Moving on. If you know me well or if you barely know me at all, you know I hate sports. I hate that people get obsessed with them and hate that people hate other people because they like a different team. I hate when people talk sh*t to others and scream *WHORE* while walking through the street with the opposing teams shirt on. Yes, that literally happened to me. I was walking to the CU vs. CSU game in Boulder one year when I was in college and had a guy yell whore at me because I was a Ram and not a Buff. I think sports sh*t is flat out whacko. How do people put so much energy into something they aren’t even a part of? You’re yelling obscenities at a player who you will never even meet face to face and who makes about 2o3249208 million more a year than you? Real cool, big guy.

Ok, but back to my point. I’m getting distracted. Ok, so I’m going to a wedding on Saturday night for one of my girlfriends. Of course, all the guys are pooping their pants about watching the Mayweather vs Pacquiao fight that night so the bride being the great person she is, ordered it for all the tv’s at the reception. She’s a kind woman. When my fiancé started talking about it the other night, I just rolled my eyes. Him being intent on changing my perception of the fight, he put on the HBO special about the 7 years leading up to this fight. He knows that if I have a backstory and can connect with the athlete, I’ll be more interested. I’m a sucker for inspirational stories. Man, was he right. I’m pumped for this fight now. It’s all I keep talking to people about. Like one of those crazy people I just talked about. But can someone please explain to me why anyone would want Mayweather to win?? Explain it to me. Because from what I’ve seen, he’s incredibly rude, arrogant and then I just found out he had domestic violence charges from his ex-wife. WTFWTF. One of the greatest fighters in the world who has knocked people out actually hit his wife. Why would anyone want that terrible man to win? Man, I’m so jazzed about this right now. He’s just the worst.

Speaking of weddings, I have 3 to go to this summer and still haven’t planned any of our own. We were in the planning process, decided on Jamaica, decided on a hotel, changed our mind about the date then BOOM, a house came up and all of our money was gone. So booking the hotel in Jamaica right now just isn’t happening. Our friends keep asking for dates so they can save up or I guess book a babysitter a year ahead of time, but we still know nothing. And honestly, I don’t know when the hell we will be able to afford it with trying to decorate the house. Is this why people get married THEN buy a house? So they put couches and dining tables and rugs on their registry? Those people are smart. HOW ARE RUGS $400??? YOU WALK ON THEM!!!! Blasphemy, I tell you.

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Bacon Braised Collard Greens

5 Stars 4 Stars 3 Stars 2 Stars 1 Star

4.7 from 3 reviews

  • Yield: 3 1x


  • 1/2 pound bacon, diced
  • 5 garlic cloves, smashed and thinly sliced
  • 2 shallots, thinly sliced
  • 2 large bunches of collard greens, stems removed and roughly chopped
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons fine sea salt
  • 2 cups chicken stock
  • 1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
  • 2 bay leaves


  1. Place a large dutch oven over medium heat. Add bacon and cook until crispy. Remove with a slotted spoon and set aside on a paper towel to soak up excess fat.
  2. Place garlic and shallots in the dutch oven and scrap the bottom with a wooden spoon. Cook for about 10 minutes, until fragrant and browned.
  3. Add greens along with chopped bacon, salt, chicken stock, balsamic vinegar, and bay leaves. Mix to combine.
  4. Cover and let cook for 30 minutes.
  5. Remove lid and let cook for another 10 minutes to help the liquid evaporate before serving.

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  1. Jessica says:

    This was my first time having collard greens and I really liked this dish! Next time I will add less salt but I’m thinking this will become one of my regular side dishes 🙂

  2. Phil B says:

    Can’t wait to make this!! Love your stuff. Make the herb chicken burgers with Carmelized onions a lot. No interest in the fight dude. They’re both way past their peaks. May weather not a nice guy.

    The horse race, that was fun. The horses could be treated better though. Oh well.

  3. Carly Ferguson says:

    I’m so glad I saw this recipe! I just bought collard greens for a recipe but it only called for 5 leaves. I was wondering what to do with the rest, and this is the perfect solution!

  4. JessiMonster says:

    This recipe. OMG indeed. Currently eating them with some delicious Paleo meatloaf. Perfect meal for this raining CO day. Thanks for reminding me that collard greens are delicious!

  5. Holly says:

    Great recipe no doubt with collard greens or mustard greens. Btw, rants about sports fanatics are no more entertaining than rants by sports fanatics.

  6. Phil B says:

    Made the greens last night. We love ’em (including my beautiful native Floridian wife). Will definitely make ’em again!

  7. Dineen says:

    Made the collard greens last night … super tasty! The only part I didn’t like, was cleaning them. 🙁 Had them with some tuscan pork chops.

  8. Q says:

    Love collard greens, and these sound nice. Whatever – Darling: buy yourself a $1000 rug, and you will never have to worry about it again, nor will you have to buy another one in your lifetime, or your children’s lifetimes. THAT’S why rugs cost $400, so you can be silly enough to buy 6 of them, instead of one good one. Get a Persian rug. Stop talking. Done. You’re welcome.

    1. juli says:

      persian? ew no way!

  9. Lauren says:

    I know this is an older post, but I just tried the greens (one who has also never gravitated toward them), and I loved them! A new staple to my menu for sure.

  10. Melody says:

    I am a die-hard, true-blue Mayweather fan and I will forever applaud his abilities as the number 1 fighter in the world. He has attitude and an ego, sure … but he backs that up! He also has to be overly confident (to the point where it’s annoying to us mere mortals) for a couple of reasons:

    1) he’s a boxer and if he’s not 130% mentally strong ad confident, he will get his arse kicked. As an amateur fighter myself, I can tell you how scary it is to step into the ring and face a skilled opponent whose sole objective is to take your head off. At that moment, no one can help you and no one can believe in you but you. So yeah, you better be a cocky son of a ___ if you want to take that into the ring and survive

    2) he’s a businessman. he knows that swag and attitude sells tickets and gets people worked up. he knows that the sport of boxing is grueling and costly and at the end of the day, he only has so many fighting days left. he’s a smart businessman who wants to drive up emotions from fans and people so that creates demand for him.

    I don’t condone whatever went down with him and his baby mama but I also don’t know what the situation was that caused it. I do know that the world seems to be able to forgive Michael Vick for harming innocent dogs and basically forcing them to fight to the death… no one seems to mind watching him play. In my eyes, Mayweather is certainly no worst than that guy. Dogs are purely innocent … like babies … so anyone who can do such damage and derive pleasure from it is truly despicable.

    1. juli says:

      you’re comparing apples to apples. people who hurt women, children or animals are all around bad people, no matter the situation. you’re talking to the wrong person because i’m not part of the “whole world” who has forgiven Vick. i still think he’s a bad human being.