Austin is a really cool place. Like, super cool. And I haven’t even ventured into town yet. I’m just really digging the weather. It’s slightly humid right now and not too hot, so my skin is way happier. I swear, my skin always is happier in humid places. No matter how much I moisturize and oil and glob on anything hydrating, my skin is always dry in CO. Stupid skin. Stupid CO.
So PaleoFx has been fun so far. I haven’t done much or listened to much, but I’ve met some bloggers and some food lovers. Those are the best kind of people. It’s just so intimidating. All these people know so much and I don’t even know how to find jeans that fit correctly. But seriously. All these people have fantastic cookbooks and blogs and podcasts and gosh knows what else, and I feel like a child. A 24 year old blogging child who knows how to do nothing. Except eat.
I know what I need to do. I need to work on confidence. Sexy Juli 2013 is not possible without confidence. And remember how that was one of my New Year’s Resolutions? Well it was, and it’s still a work in progress.
Speaking of sexy, let’s talk about what’s not sexy. Actually, we’ll talk about what IS sexy and what IS NOT sexy.
Lesson 1: What IS sexy
- Men in jeans with flip flops. I dig that look. If a guy can pull that off, I’m down. If he can’t, he probably should get tanner feet. And relax a little more. Relaxed people tend to be sexier people.
Lesson 2: What IS NOT sexy
- Men in jeans with five fingers. And a dress shirt. And a blazer. Not ok. Do you hear me?? NOT OK. Just because you have pale toes doesn’t mean you have to wear gloves on your feet. I understand the benefit to five fingers, I do, but when you’re having dinner, after you’ve showered and shaved and put on pants that are more snug around your nether regions, do not slide on foot socks to sport around women who are in high heels.
Lessons learned by JB. You’re welcome male population. I just got you laid. And when I say laid, I mean I just got you flowers around your neck in Hawaii. Not really, but I have to say that so people don’t get offended. But seriously, you’re welcome.
Do you remember the other day when I posted Shrimp and Jalapeño Sweet Potato Biscuits? Well, I topped them with gravy. Because I want gravy on a regular basis. These still aren’t exactly the same, but they did the job. I’m not craving them anymore. Right now I’m just craving sleep. Talking about paleo all day is exhausting. Not really, just eating a lot of food and standing is exhausting. Not really. I’m just a bore. And similar to a child.
Oh goodness. I need to do 13.4 tomorrow.
Biscuits and Gravy
- Yield: 3-6 1x
Ingredients
- 6 Shrimp and Jalapeño Sweet Potato Biscuits
- 1 (14 ounce) can of coconut milk
- 1 pound Pork Breakfast Sausage
- 3 teaspoons Coconut Flour (or arrowroot powder)
- 1/2 teaspoon dried parsley
- 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
- 1/4 teaspoon dried sage
- 1/8 teaspoon smoke paprika
- salt and pepper, to taste
Instructions
- Make your biscuits!!
- While biscuits are cooling, add the breakfast sausage to the pan and cook until you no longer see any pink, breaking up the sausage as it cooks.
- Once meat is cooked through, remove with slotted spoon and place in a bowl.
- Leave the rendered fat in the pan and add your coconut flour to the hot pan teaspoon by teaspoon while constantly whisking.
- Once you get a thickened mixture, add coconut milk to the pan, whisk then add the parsley, garlic powder, sage, smoked paprika and salt and pepper. Mix well.
- When the flavors meld, add breakfast sausage back in. Taste and salt and pepper as needed.
- Pour on top of biscuits. Or eat with a spoon. Or drink. Whatever you need.
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Thank you so much for this recipe. My son just discovered that he likes biscuits and gravy through his lunch food co-op at school. The kids are learning how to cook and make their own lunches. Anyhow, take out the jalapenos and I think he will be making this for his mama.
Ok, 1.) Biscuits and gravy is my all time favorite breakfast that I’m even willing to eat (gluten and all) IF they are done right. So thank you. And 2.) YOU have an awesome blog with tons of followers AND a kick ass cooking book. You are so popular in the paleo community, even my non paleo friends know of you because you have healthy recipes and are freaking hilarious. Plus you get more comments than any other blogger I see around (especially including myself.) So BOOM self consciousness, you did not win today because Juli is busy owning your ass.
Hahahaha I love your recipes— but I frequent your blog to hear your hilarious stories. You’re someone I’d wanna hang out with. Thanks for just being real.
im eating my last 2 biscuits right now…damn.
Better make some more then!
I have So Delicious coconut milk in my fridge- you know, the kind that comes in a half gallon. Would that work, or do I need the canned stuff?
I’m literally laughing over the photo! Who wears Vibrams with normal clothes???
I can’t wait to try this! It looks amazing!!! You should just come up to Lubbock while you’re in TX! You can get a WOD in with us here at Capstone Crossfit!
No five-fingers for me. Never have, never will. Jeans, yes. Five-finger foot-sock-things, noooooooo indeed.
and damn, I need to make this…
People who wear FiveFingers with dress clothes aren’t doing it to make a fashion statement :/ trust me, if I could wear a nice pair of flats, I would. But when the alternative to FiveFingers is to have foot cramps all night because your feet are no longer pointed like high heels but actually shaped like a normal foot, you wear the vibrams. Its actually PAINFUL to wear dress shoes.
We get enough flac from everyday people for wearing them, are we really gonna get it from bloggers promoting a healthy lifestyle too? 🙁
yes, i’m sorry sad panda. he did not have to wear high heels to this event. he could have even worn flip flops and it would have been fine. but a blazer and five fingers. stop it.
Juli, you are magical 🙂 best post ever.
LMAO
No, you lost me there on the comment on flip-flops being a better alternative to Vibrams. If you think the toe-gloves are ALREADY gauche, what makes showcasing their bare, nasty male paws any better? ESPECIALLY if paired with a suit?
IMO, flip-flops are for the beach. In any other case, they are for people who are TOO (W)USSY to go barefoot/TOO LAZY to wear REAL shoes.
I have Fred Flinstone feet. Always have, always will. Yet I can find something else to wear besides Vibrams. Even paleo folk are susceptible to trends. So wear them by day, but when you dress up, dress your feet up too!
Holy crap. I can’t wait to make this….