Yep. Face is stillllllllll peeling. It’s really great. I just love it. Why wouldn’t I want to spend 3+ hours in the mirror a day picking at my face? Yes I know I’m not suppose to pick. But I look like Benjamin in his old/young days. That made no sense. I look like BenjieB when he was born and look like an 80 year old. Raking in those dudes. That’s all I do.

So last night, I curled up in my bed, happy as a clam then woke up rested AND STARVING. So I meandered on over to the kitchen to make some delicious coffee and decided to get balls deep in some peanut butter. I know it’s not paleo ya d*ck. But I felt like eating half my body weight in fat was the smart thing to do. Oh and I ate this coconut dessert recipe by Elana that I made over the weekened…on a Saturday night…by myself. Yeah, I’m THAT cool. But anyways, while consuming this peanut butter and coconut dessert, sometimes at the same time, I glanced over at the clock to find out….it was 2:45am. I was eating my body weight in fat at 2:45am. I felt like a failure. Then was pissed I had to go back to sleep. I’m like a drunken mess, minus the drunk part.

So I’m really trying to figure out what the hell I’m doing on Twitter. Still. I don’t exactly understand some of the things people are saying. I feel like how my parents must feel when I’m talking to them about CrossFit and it sounds like code. Reading some people’s Tweets and RT’s and #FF’s just doesn’t all make sense. I literally keep having to google what some of these trends mean. I’m 23 years old people. I should be pr-tothe-ofessional. But instead I find myself going into the ‘Help’ section on my Twitter account, daily. Or sometimes I text my friend Diego to ask him what the hell I’m doing. He’s a Tweet pro. Then I just hashtag every single word. What do you mean #of isn’t a trend?! You know nothing.

Wanna know what hands down is my favorite “paleo” chocolate cake in the world??! No, I’m not even kidding. I would honestly make this then hide it in my room, under my bed, just so Laura couldn’t have any. I’m that desperate for chocolate cake. It’s seriously THAT good. Check out this Easy Black and White Cake by Elana. If you’re pissed because it has white chocolate chips in it, you’re high. It’s totally worth it. I dream about it. My mouth is literally salivating as I type. I need to be careful. Salivating onto your keyboard is dangerous. Believe me, I would know.

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Chocolate Cashew Butter

5 Stars 4 Stars 3 Stars 2 Stars 1 Star

5 from 13 reviews

  • Yield: 4+ 1x

Ingredients

Scale
  • 2 cups dry roasted cashews
  • 1/4 cup melted coconut oil (you can use walnut, almond, etc.)
  • 2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
  • 2 tablespoons raw honey
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 1 teaspoon sea salt

Instructions

  1. Add your roasted cashews to your food processor and turn on. Let the food processor do it’s magic.
  2. When the cashews are become thicker and almost ball up into a ball of happiness, add your oil directly to your cashews while the food processor is still running.
  3. Once your get a runnier nut butter, turn food processor off, then add your cocoa powder, honey, vanilla, and salt.
  4. Turn back on to let everything incorporate.
  5. Add more oil if you want a more runny nut butter.
  6. Consume with anything. Apples. Carrots, On a burger. Serious. I just eat it by the spoonful. I’m classy.

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PaleOMG Chocolate Cashew Butter
oopsies poopsies. i ate some.
that jar was gone in a day. keep being awesome juli. ew, talking to myself in the 3rd person isn’t cool

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You May Also Like:

Pecan Coconut Butter

 Easy Chocolate Almond Butter Cups

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75 Comments

  1. Juli says:

    Seriously this crap is amazingly dangerous. WOO HOO exciting Friday night. Making Choc. Nut butter. Taking it on our week long camping trip, Along with many other of your dishes!! Thanks JB!!

  2. Florencia Accetturo says:

    I love cheese

  3. Nicole says:

    OMG this just made my life worth living. AMAZING. I would give it ten stars if I could, and it’s so freaking easy.






  4. Frank says:

    Made it…..ate it. I hate you! And by hate you I mean love you!

    Happy Thanksgiving,

    Frank

  5. Amy says:

    This is so delicious and easy, even if my husband did say it looked like poop!






  6. Ashley says:

    Juli… So I’ve finally started my 30 day Paleo Challenge with a group of friends after lots of convincing from my Crossfit box. Let me just say I’ve been struggling!! Wahhh giving up breads and cheese and sugary goodness and all that I love has been giving me fits lately. I’m soooo happy that I’ve stumbled across your blog!! Thanks for all the great recipes! I just finished making this and GOOD HEAVENS IT’S AWESOOOMMEEE.

    You’re legit, keep keeping it real 😉






  7. Frances Kips says:

    I just made this 5 minutes ago! Awesome! Triple batched! Sharing with friends! Do i need to refrigerate?

    1. juli says:

      i would just to help it keep longer

  8. Emily says:

    Help! I made this recipe and after I added the cocoa powder, honey etc it globed up and started separating from the oil and wouldn’t mix together. What do u think happened?

    1. juli says:

      I’m not sure. Maybe it was over mixed? I haven’t had that issue

  9. Larissa says:

    Just made this with raw cashews & agave syrup. SO SO SO GOOD! I was craving Nutella and this is so much better, yum,
    Now if only my blender was better… though it’s kinda nice to have big cashew chunks in there aswell 🙂






  10. Tara Oliver says:

    This is by far the BEST chocolate nut butter I have found in the last couple of years!! I love it! And ate too much of it when I made it for my kids. Thank you!!

    Do you know the shelf life? Obviously it lasts longer when in the fridge. I assume it might last a while since there isn’t any dairy in it. I of course like to keep it in the pantry since it is so hard to spread from the fridge. But it’s so super yummy. Thank you for the recipe!

    1. juli says:

      i have no clue about the shelf life, i keep all my recipes in the fridge since they don’t have any preservatives in them