Remember when I talked about this mousse? I told you we would have the recipe for this mousse someday. I told you!! Well that day has finally come. Hope you love it. Don’t be deceived by the picture that didn’t come out too great since I was trying to get a picture done in less than a minute. It actually does taste amazing. We winged it on stage so I’m winging this recipe again and it still came out delicious! Remember, my recipe doesn’t have crumbled bacon on top, but that’s because I had no bacon in the house. I know, I suck. But candied walnuts ain’t so bad, bro. So stop hatin’.
So I went jeans shopping this week. I did it. I put a good chunk of money into my checking account in hopes that I wouldn’t feel restricted to not buy more expensive jeans. My goal was to actually find jeans and not be depressed by the couple pairs that didn’t fit. And I took Sergio with me to make sure I didn’t cry, which thank goodness I did because I absolutely would have if he weren’t there. I totally almost sh*t the bed when I broke a nail trying to pull up some of the jeans at Nordstrom. And I f*cking got my nails done the day before so I was pissed. Obviously. I’m cussing about it. I’m a child. I pretty much had demin blue coloring under my fingernails from all the squeezing and uncomfortable pulling into the jeans. It’s not easy getting my ass into jeans, it’s not easy at all.
Anywho, after trying on quite a few pairs of jeans at Nordstrom, I finally found a pair. First I tried on Joe Jeans, but my butt looked weird. Then I tried on Paige Jeans but they didn’t look totally right. Then Mother Jeans which gave me a gap in the waist. Then I finally found the best pair for my chunky butt. Citizen of Humanity jeans. At least I think that’s what they are called. Anywho, of course they were the most expensive ones I tried on. OF COURSE. But I decided to take the plunge since I didn’t see any light on the horizon when it came to any other jeans. You know what that put me back? Please don’t be disgusted with me, I’m already disgusted enough with myself. And I’m really trying to feel comfortable in my own skin. Back to the point, I spent $224.00 on ONE pair of jeans. I know, I’m gross. And I really don’t have that money to spend, but I had to do it. I can’t keep crying in dressing rooms thinking my body is disgusting because nothing fits, I can’t. So I did it. I bought the jeans. Then moved on with my life.
I then moved on to Abercrombie. I know, I’m not 16 years old, but a couple people recommended those jeans on my blog so I thought it was worth a try. Turns out, it wasn’t. My bubble butt doesn’t work in those jeans. Bummer.
I moved on once again. Sergio stayed very patient through all of this and did not complain whatsoever. Or act bored. He’s the best. So we went to Lucky. I finally found a pair of jeans that I liked after trying on a few, but they were too short. Highwaters ain’t my thang. But the Sophia cut is pretty great if you are looking for a curvy fit. So I moved on, not trying to order those jeans online in a longer cut. Never a good idea.
We waddled our way to the Buckle. Terrible idea. I don’t like bedazzled jeans. On women or men in bedazzled jeans. More importantly, on myself. No need to bring more attention to that area. I walked in, felt like I was 14 this time, then walked out when ALL of the jeans had rhinestones on them or stitching that you could see from a mile away. Ew. Not my cup o’ tea.
Last but not least, I went to the Gap. Thank goodness I passed it or I would have completely forgot about that place. So I walked in, found their 1969 Curvy Fit (long) jeans, and got two pairs of those bastards! They fit great!! Not quite as great as the $224 pair I had just purchased but good enough. Only problem is I have to get them hemmed and have no clue where to go in Denver. Yelp is probably my best bet. Unless YOU know one!! Give me answers.
All I can conclude from spending $375 on jeans is that I still don’t love how I look quite yet. This has been a battle my entire life that I joke about through my blog to deal with the upset and frustration, but I really hope to someday be content with what I have and what I look at in the mirror. CrossFit has completely changed my body, in a way that I’m not comfortable with. I love the muscle I have created, but hate the shape my body has taken on. And hate is a strong word. I envy the women whose bodies never change but at the same time, I know we all feel the ups and downs of body image.
As the next year goes by, I hope to be able to create a happier me. That’s much more comfortable in my own skin. As for now, I’m taking some steps to fix my skin and to create a body I’m happy with. Let’s see how this year goes!
Can you believe you just read an entire blog post about jeans? I’m sorry.
Kind of.
Chocolate Mousse with Cinnamon Sautéed Bananas
- Yield: 2 1x
Ingredients
- 1 can (14 ounce) full fat coconut milk left in the fridge overnight (it must be canned!)
- 1/4 cup sunflower seed butter (or any nut butter)
- 1/3 cup raw honey
- 1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
- 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon (or more)
- pinch of salt
- 1 banana, sliced
- 2–3 tablespoons coconut oil
- 1 teaspoons raw honey
- 1/4 teaspoon cinnamon (or more)
- handful of chopped walnuts
- pinch of salt
- bacon (optional- optional because I had none at my house to make crumbles with)
Instructions
- Place full fat coconut milk in your food processor. I used my blendtec because it’s absolutely amazing for this kind of thing. Be sure to add in the coconut water and pulp that may have separated while being in the fridge.
- Then add in nut butter, raw honey, cocoa powder, cinnamon, and a bit of salt. Puree until smooth. Pour in ramekins and place in fridge for 3+ hours to completely set. If you want a even harder mousse, place in the freezer to help harden more.
- Once mousse has set, place 2-3 tablespoons of coconut oil in a small skillet over medium-high heat.
- Add in honey to melt just a bit then add in sliced bananas.
- Sprinkle with cinnamon and pinch of salt.
- Once the bananas have caramelized on one side (about 2 minutes or so) flip with a spatula, then toss in chopped walnuts, and let both caramelize even more.
- Remove from heat to let cool just a bit then top your mousse off with this goodness.
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Julie- Your shopping was a success!!! I usually walk out of the store leaving a cart/bag/dressing room full of clothes with tear stains on them. bawling like a baby… You are beautiful (for.real.)and I love how you share.
And I do know how to spell your name- I was just being generous with the eeeeeee’s!
Ann Taylor Loft has a cuvry pair that are AWESOME!! And any good dry cleaner will also be able to tailor things for you, at a reasonable cost.
Pants are tricky little buckaroos. Why can’t it be okay to not wear pants in public…hahaha if only! I also am not a small person, I go between 155-163 lbs of muscle at 5’8” and it’s hard to look at myself sometimes and be proud of how strong I am, since I don’t look feminine…I don’t crossfit, but I do olympic lifts and play soccer so my legs are big, along with most other parts of my body. I loved your carrot video, it’s awesome to see someone else who has a similar body type and it helps a lot!!! Thanks for your excellent blog, keep up the great work.
Gap jeans have been the only jeans that I will buy for about the past 3 years. As far as a cleaner/tailor, I would recommend to the Snowflake cleaners off of Colorado. Thanks for your post!!!!
I <3 my butt, but jeans and jean shorts can go efff themselves. My booty refuses to fit in anything that is designed for my waiste size. And to reassure that my strong sexy buns that they will never fit into jeans…..ever…. I'm going to devour this mousse tonight.
I normally don’t post replies on blogs and you have had some really great replies as it is but I felt like I had to throw my hat into the ring. I am 38 and have always had “junk in the trunk” and “athletic” thighs. Along with most of the replies and per your experience nothing ever fits in the waist. That being said please do yourself a favor and find something you love about your body. Life is way too short and you have way to many experiences in front of you to waste on negativity! There are enough people out there who will be hapoy to do that for you! I have found that I always used to concentrate on my butt and thighs now after having two children (now pregnant with my third) I am completely obsessed with how my belly isn’t flat anymore. I will always be something! I will never be a skinny or petite girl (I’m not huge either 5’6″ 144 lb). I look healthy and the last thing I ever would want is for someone to walk past me and say “that girl looks like she needs to eat a cheeseburger”! Love your athletic body!
Have you tried Loft? I buy curvy jeans because of a smaller waist and ample butt/thighs from kickboxing and they fit like a glove. Best part – they are reasonable in price especially when they go on sale! Love your website and awesome recipes!
Thanks for talking “real life” on here. it is too often that people post what they do to stay skinny and what their diet plan is, but never talk about any frustrations they went through to get there. Knowing that you are not afraid to admit that you have off days and insecurities made me want to continue reading your blog. The fact that you stay as positive as you can makes it all better to read! Thank you and I love your humor!!
So, after wading through all of those “don’t hate your body” posts (okay, I skipped to the bottom already). I didn’t read the post to mean that your body is anything weird, just not who the manufacturers generally make jeans to fit! I get it. I’ve cycled/lifted, etc, did the things that give your body the shape it has, too. Had the same jean buying experience, boo hoo, call the whaaaambulance! You’ll find the company that makes the perfect jeans to fit your butt (mine’s Guess hand-me-downs or Old Navy). Keep up the awesome foodie posts, keep on swinging those kbs and rockin’ our kitchens!
Thanks, girl, you’re awesome.
here is the rule… always. shop. buzzed! 🙂 i totally feel your pain. i have ALWAYS had big legs, resulting in a large gap in the waist of jeans. I now stick to jeans with some stretch in them. Try madewell and banana. I love that sergio went with you. I read your blog and you are like a character in a TV show to me. We are all sitting here rooting for you 🙂
I am so happy that you have brought up the skin issue. I have always had pretty good skin, but an allergy to sodium laurel sulfate has caused some problems in the past year or two. It is in practically every soap! when I use it I get little bumps all over. It is also in laundry detergent and it causes bumps down the back of my legs that hurt! I have to go out of my way to find products without it. ANYWAY i have been considering forgoing face soap and using coconut oil. Hopefully I don’t turn into a grease monkey!