That title is a fib. And the weights picture is from a while ago. It’s all a straight up lie. I didn’t really eat paleo yesterday. Nor did I care. I wanted to post a recipe today, but I wanted to have a holiday like the rest of the US of A. So that’s what I did. I instagrammed my food experience instead of cooking you all up something, so you all could know what a random day of eating and drinking looks like for me.
It’s funny because people will give me sh*t for not eating paleo, or ask me if the beer I’m drinking is paleo…all in all, you people aren’t funny. Nor original. I eat what I want, when I want. Especially on a holiday. Just because I run a paleo food blog doesn’t mean I’m not a human being. I know what foods will screw my stomach up, so I stay away from those, and basque in the ones that will only slightly mess me up. Like sugar. And alcohol. And sugary alcohol.
So let’s talk about the day:
8:30 – woke up and drank coffee with Laura
9:30 – mobility whining with Laura
10:00 – OHS strength then partner workout
12:30 – went to Whole Foods
1:00 – made paleo blueberry waffles with lemon custard for Laura and I. We ate that with a couple strips of bacon. Stupid good.
2:00 – went to the park to see some good looking people. This is where a Strongbow was consumed. Delicious. Then a 4th of July jello shot. That tasted disgusting. No offense Amanda, just the truth.
3:30 – went to a friends BBQ. Lots of bros around. But I definitely didn’t get hit on by any. Becaaaaaause they’re my friends. Dumb. But I did get thrown in the pool. And took Jake with me. Within this time frame, I had:
- 1 brat.
- part of a piece of steak.
- some sweet potato chips and tortilla chips in some guac.
- 1/2 Bud Light Lime because it tastes like dish soap.
- 2ish sangria type drinks.
- Oh I had a shot of vodka too. Damn you Krystle.
- I tasted a stupid small piece of brownie that made my tastebuds excited for only just 2 seconds.
- And then I split a naked cheeseburger with my friend Garrett. I gave him the bigger half. He’s a growing boy
.
8:00 – Once we got home, Laura and I made some vodka sodas. I drank part of mine but then was just more interested in sleeping. Our friends Brian and Justin came over, but I wasn’t a very good host. I sat on my patio and barely moved. That’s how I think any holiday should be played out. Sitting and chatting.
So what you’ll mostly get from this day was I consumed a hearty amount of alcohol annnnnd not that much food. Alcohol is filling. I know people are going to hate me and not respect me once they see what my 4th looked like in food form, but I don’t care. Just not lying to any of you.
And if you already follow me on instagram @paleomg, you’ve seen all these pictures and you’re probably bored. Jokes on you!
tralala you didn’t eat paleo… whatev… LOL! Honestly, I do love the human aspect of posts like this – people who /always/ post about their super perfect eating trigger my F-U switch and make me want to have a pizza because I can’t live up to that kind of expectation.
But all that’s beside the point because I’d LOOOOVE the recipe for the custard! Please post it soon!! (love your brownie recipe, by the way… the Awesome Husband has finally agreed (mostly on his own) to embark on a 30-day Paleo Experience. Considering he’s a reforming sugar hound, that’ll be one of those treat recipes that will help save his (and my) sanity. 🙂
Thank you for keeping it real!! I don’t feel so guilty now! However, I do feel like a beached whale! Alcohol consumption equals nasty food choices for me!!
BTW…where’s the recipe for the blueberry waffles with lemon curd? Is the lemon curd paleo? That would SO rock if it was!!
You know, it seems like people do take a certain delight in seeing a normal paleo-eater go off the rails. Kind of irritating. Yes, I know this homemade ice cream isn’t paleo. No, you are not the effing food police, yes, I’m going to eat it and enjoy it. Sooo ridiculous. Eat what you want. I don’t say anything to you when you eat Lean Cuisine meals every single day…
Ellen, TOTALLY right there with you girl!! Great post Juli. Makes me feel like it is okay to go off every once and awhile. Thanks 🙂
Here’s what’s up: I brought your 4th of July lemon tart to a party where it was the sole paleo dish (and perhaps the only recipe constructed of things that once had natural origins.) It was rapidly consumed by food muggles.
As we’ve been maintained a paleo-structured diet in our house for the past year, it comes as no surprise that yesterday’s not-so-paleo 7-layer dip led to 7-layers of butt this morning. Clearly an indication that eating well is where it’s at.
“food muggles” — LOVE THAT! thanks for the chuckle!
I love you so, JB! Mad props for your honesty, and for being real, and for not being a proselytizing asshole that tries to make the rest of the world feel like you think you’re better than them.
You deserve a day of careless fun….and drinking!
All of my family will hate on me when eating non-paleo. “Are you ALLOWED to eat that?” Bitch! I’m a grownass woman! I can eat whatever the hell I want to! Good for you for enjoying your holiday.
I think more than anything, we appreciate you more for this! We just can’t be perfect all of the time ya know? 😉 I hope you enjoyed yourself and sometimes we need to just let loose and indulge… I know I did the past FOUR days in a row… so what’s one day for you?? you rock girlfriend
mmm. i ate good yesterday 🙂 drank bud light lime too. but with clamato in it. a little too much probably.