I’m mad. Like, really f*cking mad. Ok, that’s a lie, I don’t really get mad, I just get sad. So, I’m really f*cking sad. My face was finally getting better, finally looking like something was changing and my face was starting to play nice, but NO. No, no,no. It ain’t playin’ nice no mo’. My face has freaked out. Like OMG Ihateyousomuchjuli. Iwantyoutostaysingleforever. Andidefinitelydontwantanyonetofindyouattractive. Ever.
You, my face, are a straight up b*tch.
Ugh, I’m going to get so many emails about my dirty mouth now. I’ll save you the time…please don’t send them.
Anywho, I’m having one of those days of feeling absolutely hopeless. I don’t know what to do. I clean up my diet and it gets a little bit better, then it goes back to normal. I change up my face cleansing routine and it gets a little better, then goes back to normal. I get off birth control, I stay on birth control. I take fish oil, I don’t take fish oil. I eat more fat, I eat less fat. I don’t eat dark chocolate, I do eat dark chocolate. I get facials, I don’t get facials. You get what I’m throwin’ out? I try everything, but in the end my face has full control, and I am left staring in the mirror with tears in my eyes, choking back the egg of frustration that sits in my throat.
Just today, I started taking the probiotic saccharomyce boulardii which was recommended by Liz of Cave Girl Eats. I also am getting cod liver oil soon to start trying that as well. And making sure all sugar and nuts are cut from my diet. It’s just so annoying that my mind has to be filled with thoughts of how ugly I am or how I wish I could improve my skin. That’s dumb. It should be filled with cookbook thoughts, and Christmas gift thoughts, and food thoughts. But no, the face has won.
So here’s my question out of utter frustration and anguish…do I try acutane? Do I face the fact that I may be incredibly depressed, moody, and upset for months because of the drug? Do I face the fact that I may have to take the drug even though my face and other body parts will literally dry up and peel off? Do I face the fact that it may not even work? I don’t know what to do, but I’m obviously upset enough to blab all about it and want some of your advice. So, advise me.
On a more positive note, you NEED to try these muffins. They are DELICIOUS.
Morning Glory Muffins (nut free option)
- Yield: 9 1x
Ingredients
- 1 apple, peeled and cored, shredded
- 1 large carrot, peeled
- 1/2 cup sunflower seed butter
- 1 cup pepitas
- 3 eggs, whisked
- 1/2 cup coconut oil, melted
- 1/4 cup raisins
- 1/4 cup pecans, roughly chopped (optional for nut free version)
- 1 tablespoon cinnamon
- 1 tablespoon raw honey
- 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
- pinch of salt
Instructions
- Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
- Now add your pepitas to a small saucepan over medium heat with a tablespoon of fat. I used coconut oil.
- Cook for 3-5 minutes, moving around lots so they don’t burn and so they cook on all sides.
- While your pepitas are roasting, add your apple and carrot to your food processor with the shredding attachment. If you don’t have a food processor, use a grater to shred your apple and carrot.
- Add your apple and carrot to a bowl along with your sunflower seed butter and rinse out your food processor bowl.
- Then add your roasted pepitas to the food processor and puree until you get a flour/meal.
- Then add your pepita flour, eggs, coconut oil, honey, raisins, pecans, cinnamon, salt, and baking soda. Mix well.
- Pour your batter into 9 FULL muffin liners in your muffin tin. I lined my muffins tin with silicone muffin liners but paper would do just fine.
- Bake for 25-30 minutes until cooked through.
- Let cool slightly, but eat warm, because they are the best that way.
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More Nut Free Muffins:
Apple Cinnamon Muffins (nut free)
Chocolate Chip Protein Muffins (nut free)
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Have you gotten a complete hormone blood level profile done? I have been hearing/reading lately about how lots of crossfit, HIIT, and excessive lifting can dramatically increase women’s testosterone levels, and in that case, no topical remedy or diet fix is going to help.
I have PCOS, so my hormones are already screwy, but I know that when I lift too frequently I start getting those awful cystic pimple things, especially on my chin, jawline and forehead.
Anyways, getting a hormone test done might be worth a shot if you haven’t already. If you have insurance, it usually is covered by that.
Pleaae don’t try accutane! It’s been 6years since I did it and my skin is still fucked from it. Dry, red, things that never happened before. The best solution is natural products and a great aestitician. I found one in pdx who uses starflower essentials…this shit has saved my skin. I know how much acne sucks but trust me, accutane ain’t worth it.
I was on Accutane for 9 months. It was some serious shit, yes. But you know what…aside from stress and hormonal pimples, I have zero problems. And I had acne BAD. Like, painful and huge pimples all the time bad. Just be sure it’s what you want.
Your skin will dry out and will be so scaly it will hurt. And nothing but Aquaphor will make your lips not scaly. Something to think about. You will also have to be on two forms of birth control, take a pregnancy test every month, and get your blood drawn to test your cholesterol levels monthly.
I agree with Stephanie. Serious stuff. Crazy serious.
Don’t take acutane! My mom took it when she was younger and now she has breast cancer (which our doctors have hypothesized came from the acutane since my mother is the healthiest person possible) I have had the same exact problems as you and I am still trying to find a solution…. Lately apple cider vinegar and tea tree oil have been working pretty well topically…..
Julie!! Ok, I just started this a few days ago and my face is already clearing up. Buy Organic and Unpasteurized Apple Cider Vinegar (Braggs or Omega Nutrition are good brands). Drink it in the morning, first thing (2 tbsp ACV+glass of lukewarm water+lemon juice (optional)). Drink it again in the afternoon, but only put 1tbsp of ACV in this time. So in total, you will have 3 tbsp of ACV over the day. Don’t take it too close to bedtime because it can give you energy too!! (bonus!!)
Anyways, honestly, my skin has gotten SO much better. You can totally google (that’s how learned about it) if you’re not sure.
It makes your body more alkaline (like if you were to eat a lot of leafy greens)… if your problem is the same as mine, my skin flares up because my body is inflamed/too acidic.
Ps. Make sure too always take it diluted with water, and don’t swish it around your mouth too much. If it is too concentrated it can damage tooth enamel and won’t feel too good going down. It sounds crazy, but it’s working for me. Good luck!! xo
Spironolactone is amazing medication used to treat hormonal acne that does not have nearly the same negative side effects as other medications. I’m 27 and struggled with persistent hormonal acne and it’s been incredible.
I was on accutane in the winter of 1997. I didn’t have severe acne but I had tried every medication to clear my skin with no avail. I will say it was horrible while I was on it. On the 2nd day of being on it my entire face seemed to dry up and peel off, lips bled constantly for 4 months (the duration of my time on it) it was semi painful but I got through it and loved the results! I swear I never wore makeup the rest of high school because of how great my skin was. I had other friends, all guys, that were on it around the same time I was, their skin problems were much more significant than mine. I do remember one of them feeling pretty low but I think a lot of that had to do with how he looked while taking accutane. It’s just hard because you really look a bit scary for the time you’re on it. My brother in law also was on it about 6 years ago and has since suffered digestive issues however I think if he were to eat a better diet, a lot of these issues wouldn’t bother him. So, in saying that, my advice would be to do your research, talk with you doctor about how strong of a script you would have to be on and for how long you would have to take it, make a decision based on that and just go for it or don’t, but don’t look back. The physical discomfort was the only thing that sucked for me, who knows, maybe I had other adverse effects occur but I have no idea about them if they exist. I liked being on it during the winter because you’re already dry, pale and uglier than in the summer, also, your skin is super sensitive to the sun so you can lock yourself indoors and hide out 🙂 In retrospect, I would have paid a lot more attention to what damage I could have been doing to my digestive system while on it and what it would take to compensate for that damage. Knowing now how meds can effect that stuff, it would be the only reason I could see that I wouldn’t do it again. I do still get minor breakouts, mostly around my period, and I think also because I mess with my skin too much so something small turns into a huge nastoid thing in no time… ocd? 🙂 So… I hope this was a little bit of help in your decision making. I guess
triple post, wow! I didn’t mean to say ‘I guess’ at the end…. didn’t read through it thoroughly before I posted it and it seemed like I was being mean…. sorry! Just a typo!
holy crap that was a loooong asssss post…. sorry
Hi Juli,
It’s about time I comment on you’re blog! My heart aches for you because I know exactly how you feel. I have had hormonal cystic acne for at least 10 years and it got REALLY bad for this past year and has finally cleared up. I’ll link my post for more info, but here is what helped me. I have been washing my face with oil, talking fermented cod liver oil, and what I think has helped the most is eating fermented food daily. The oil cleansing method was the first thing that improved my skin, but i was still having breakouts. My face has been pretty darn clear for a month now and I really think it’s from eating fermented foods (mostly sauerkraut) I have been eating them 1-2 time per day. I have been taking a probiotic for a while, but I never knew that fermented foods have a TON more probiotics in them. I even ate horribly over Thanksgiving weekend and just got my period and I still didn’t breakout. I also think I have been dealing with a yeast/candidia issue, and the fermented foods have helped that too. I hope you find a solution, please feel free to email me with any questions!
http://healthydiaries.com/2012/07/17/how-i-improved-my-skin-acne-scaring-overall-complexion/