I’m mad. Like, really f*cking mad. Ok, that’s a lie, I don’t really get mad, I just get sad. So, I’m really f*cking sad. My face was finally getting better, finally looking like something was changing and my face was starting to play nice, but NO. No, no,no. It ain’t playin’ nice no mo’. My face has freaked out. Like OMG Ihateyousomuchjuli. Iwantyoutostaysingleforever. Andidefinitelydontwantanyonetofindyouattractive. Ever.
You, my face, are a straight up b*tch.
Ugh, I’m going to get so many emails about my dirty mouth now. I’ll save you the time…please don’t send them.
Anywho, I’m having one of those days of feeling absolutely hopeless. I don’t know what to do. I clean up my diet and it gets a little bit better, then it goes back to normal. I change up my face cleansing routine and it gets a little better, then goes back to normal. I get off birth control, I stay on birth control. I take fish oil, I don’t take fish oil. I eat more fat, I eat less fat. I don’t eat dark chocolate, I do eat dark chocolate. I get facials, I don’t get facials. You get what I’m throwin’ out? I try everything, but in the end my face has full control, and I am left staring in the mirror with tears in my eyes, choking back the egg of frustration that sits in my throat.
Just today, I started taking the probiotic saccharomyce boulardii which was recommended by Liz of Cave Girl Eats. I also am getting cod liver oil soon to start trying that as well. And making sure all sugar and nuts are cut from my diet. It’s just so annoying that my mind has to be filled with thoughts of how ugly I am or how I wish I could improve my skin. That’s dumb. It should be filled with cookbook thoughts, and Christmas gift thoughts, and food thoughts. But no, the face has won.
So here’s my question out of utter frustration and anguish…do I try acutane? Do I face the fact that I may be incredibly depressed, moody, and upset for months because of the drug? Do I face the fact that I may have to take the drug even though my face and other body parts will literally dry up and peel off? Do I face the fact that it may not even work? I don’t know what to do, but I’m obviously upset enough to blab all about it and want some of your advice. So, advise me.
On a more positive note, you NEED to try these muffins. They are DELICIOUS.
Morning Glory Muffins (nut free option)
- Yield: 9 1x
Ingredients
- 1 apple, peeled and cored, shredded
- 1 large carrot, peeled
- 1/2 cup sunflower seed butter
- 1 cup pepitas
- 3 eggs, whisked
- 1/2 cup coconut oil, melted
- 1/4 cup raisins
- 1/4 cup pecans, roughly chopped (optional for nut free version)
- 1 tablespoon cinnamon
- 1 tablespoon raw honey
- 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
- pinch of salt
Instructions
- Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
- Now add your pepitas to a small saucepan over medium heat with a tablespoon of fat. I used coconut oil.
- Cook for 3-5 minutes, moving around lots so they don’t burn and so they cook on all sides.
- While your pepitas are roasting, add your apple and carrot to your food processor with the shredding attachment. If you don’t have a food processor, use a grater to shred your apple and carrot.
- Add your apple and carrot to a bowl along with your sunflower seed butter and rinse out your food processor bowl.
- Then add your roasted pepitas to the food processor and puree until you get a flour/meal.
- Then add your pepita flour, eggs, coconut oil, honey, raisins, pecans, cinnamon, salt, and baking soda. Mix well.
- Pour your batter into 9 FULL muffin liners in your muffin tin. I lined my muffins tin with silicone muffin liners but paper would do just fine.
- Bake for 25-30 minutes until cooked through.
- Let cool slightly, but eat warm, because they are the best that way.
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More Nut Free Muffins:
Apple Cinnamon Muffins (nut free)
Chocolate Chip Protein Muffins (nut free)
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Yo Juli,
I think you should check out Argan Oil. My sister works at Sephora and just recently picked up some. She has really sensitive skin and tends to break out a ton. Go to Sephora and maybe ask about it. Also, DON’T STRESS haha, won’t help your out breaks! <3 ;] Thanks for the awesome food recipes too. Your the Boss!
I did Acutane twice, yeas it’s hardcore and horrible, but you are the only person that will know what you need to do, and you’re the only one that knows what it feels like to look in the mirror and be frustrated. There are some laser treatments that are less invasive… Acutane is powerful my only recommendation is Aquaphor I used it on my lips and as lotion ocassionally… I was on a super high dose and it raised my blood pressure while I was on it in college which is weird. This is the time of year to do it, not summer since if thins your skin out. Just be aware of your body… Pay attention to side effects especially to do with IBS there is a class action law suit against the drug makers currently. I would check into lasers first.. Then hormones you may have too much testoroine and a condition called PCOS … You’ll make the best decision! Follow YOUR peace!
Juli, you’re pretty bad-ass and connected in the Paleo world, so maybe you have already done this-sorry if it is a repeat. Check with Stefani Ruper of Paleo for Women. For my day job, I am a Pediatrician. Her knowledge of hormones is amazing and I have learned tons just from reading her posts. Some of the posts she has are so eye opening and include information that I was never taught in medical school. What’s best of all?? She cuts to the chase and doesn’t fill her words with a bunch of hard to understand crap.
I hope you find a solution. I totally get your anger with the face. Stupid hormones! They need to just do their job and be done!
In the meantime, I will let you know how much I love your blog and appreciate your humor from way out here in ND!!! My favorite thing is to discover I haven’t been online in a while and when I check your blog theres tons of new Juli chronicles to read about!!! such fun!!! Keep up the good work, sista!!! 🙂
I’m so sorry that you are suffering with this. You really are lovely. You should give acupuncture a try. I say this as an acupuncturist 🙂
Anyway, I do love your recipes and I’ve made a ton of them. I’m not paleo but I don’t eat many grains. My husband has been cutting out grains and I’ve been cooking him many of your concoctions. The magical brownies are just that, magical.
OK, I don’t have acne. But I do have body image issues and I feel like our struggles, and those of a lot of fellow 20/30 something single gals could be similar. We see something about our appearance that we don’t like and we blame our singleness (or whatever) on it, and then we obsess about it. Mine is weight. I was a f*ckin’ Division 1 All-American athlete with this body, and I’m fit by health standards (low body fat, yada, yada, yada), but I look in the mirror and see Amazon woman. What guy wants that???? But, Lord help us, the right guy will. Health is one thing, appearance is another. If it’s a symptom of an internal issue, definitely try to figure it out. But don’t add something to your body that your body doesn’t need. PLEASE, as someone that looks to you as a freakin’ awesome example of a fit, funny, beautiful woman, PLEASE share your struggles with us and be an example of how we don’t have to be crippled by our messed up views of outward beauty.
You’ll probably hate me for this but that’s okay, I still like you a lot.
Stop crossfitting.
For two weeks.
Sleeeeeep. Recharge.
Eat anything and everything. Laugh, dance, destress.
If you find you are tired, sore, fatigued and feel worse,
chances are, you’re burned out.
My hormones were f*ed up from all this orthorexic, HIIT, intermittent fasting, stressed out nonsense.I was running off adrenaline for maybe two years.
After cutting exercise completely and stuffing my face with anything I desired, I was immobile for nearly a month. Now I can make it through the day without caffeine and without a nap. And my skin is clear and happy.
Anything I swore off as a gluten intolerance or dairy allergies went away.
Turns out my body just wanted oatmeal and nutella for years.
You’ll probably ignore this. That’s okay.
Just know that i think you deserve sugar, sleep, chocolate, an awesome boyfriend, and I think you looked way hot b4 cross fit. You look great now too, but it’s not like you ever needed to do it.
Let your body be and stop being so hard on yourself.
NO to acutane. My friend took it in high school, got super depressed and committed suicide. If he never had taken that medication, we might never know if that would have happened otherwise.
Also, and maybe I should already know if you have tried proactive, but it worked wonders for me and i started it at age 21. I was very diligent with it and saw results within 3 weeks. I continued with it for a year, and my face has been pretty good ever since!
Face…check out Lemongrass Spa Products. Products are 97-100% natural ingredients, and I haven’t met anyone it has not worked for. And to make Lemongrass even more awesome, it is a COLORADO based business =) Woot woot Colorado! Skin care is just like eating, the more processed, the less healthy. I love the stuff so much I have recently started selling it and holy moly, its good stuff. My site is http://www.ourlemongrassspa.com/2127 if you want to take a look. I’d check out the tea tree face soap, Tea Tree & Citrus Facial Mask and Dead Sea Facial Polish. Or there is a set for blemish prone skin.
All ingredients are posted on each product and on the website, so you know exactly what you’re putting into your system! Stay away from the chemicals! no good!
Oh and FYI, You make Paleo eating easy and amazing =) Thanks for all your hard work!
So I didn’t read the million comments before this so this may have already been said. I LITERALLY never comment on blogs other than the occasional giveaway but felt I needed to add my thought since I completely understand. My acne (which I’ve had pretty badly two separate times in my life, both during times of stress) was so bad I was canceling plans with friends because I couldn’t bear trying to make myself look presentable and that caused me to be depressed etc etc. my point is, I get it. I went to a dermatologist and she talked to me about options. And before we even considered acutane, she put me on an antibiotic and gave me a gel to put on my face. Yes the gel was drying, but nearly as bad as products like proactive (shit seriously made me feel like my skin was falling off when my tshirt barely touched my face.
So, go to a dermatologist, it’s worth the cost of us sanity and self love, and see what other options there are… And don’t feel bad about your choice, people who have not had severe acne do not understand how much it disrupts your life..
I’m sorry your skin is super frustrating. I’m not a doctor or anything but I’d recommend cutting out sugar/simple carbs and see how that affects you. I saw that you did the sugar detox but I’m talking like not even eating carrots for a while kind of sugar detox, like just leafy veggies and meat/fat. Your body’s PH can have a huge impact on your health. I know that if I go on a carb/sugar binge I get medical problems that no one wants to hear about and it’s all because I’ve damaged my body’s natural ability to deal with the bacteria on my skin.