I’m mad. Like, really f*cking mad. Ok, that’s a lie, I don’t really get mad, I just get sad. So, I’m really f*cking sad. My face was finally getting better, finally looking like something was changing and my face was starting to play nice, but NO. No, no,no. It ain’t playin’ nice no mo’. My face has freaked out. Like OMG Ihateyousomuchjuli. Iwantyoutostaysingleforever. Andidefinitelydontwantanyonetofindyouattractive. Ever.
You, my face, are a straight up b*tch.
Ugh, I’m going to get so many emails about my dirty mouth now. I’ll save you the time…please don’t send them.
Anywho, I’m having one of those days of feeling absolutely hopeless. I don’t know what to do. I clean up my diet and it gets a little bit better, then it goes back to normal. I change up my face cleansing routine and it gets a little better, then goes back to normal. I get off birth control, I stay on birth control. I take fish oil, I don’t take fish oil. I eat more fat, I eat less fat. I don’t eat dark chocolate, I do eat dark chocolate. I get facials, I don’t get facials. You get what I’m throwin’ out? I try everything, but in the end my face has full control, and I am left staring in the mirror with tears in my eyes, choking back the egg of frustration that sits in my throat.
Just today, I started taking the probiotic saccharomyce boulardii which was recommended by Liz of Cave Girl Eats. I also am getting cod liver oil soon to start trying that as well. And making sure all sugar and nuts are cut from my diet. It’s just so annoying that my mind has to be filled with thoughts of how ugly I am or how I wish I could improve my skin. That’s dumb. It should be filled with cookbook thoughts, and Christmas gift thoughts, and food thoughts. But no, the face has won.
So here’s my question out of utter frustration and anguish…do I try acutane? Do I face the fact that I may be incredibly depressed, moody, and upset for months because of the drug? Do I face the fact that I may have to take the drug even though my face and other body parts will literally dry up and peel off? Do I face the fact that it may not even work? I don’t know what to do, but I’m obviously upset enough to blab all about it and want some of your advice. So, advise me.
On a more positive note, you NEED to try these muffins. They are DELICIOUS.
Morning Glory Muffins (nut free option)
- Yield: 9 1x
Ingredients
- 1 apple, peeled and cored, shredded
- 1 large carrot, peeled
- 1/2 cup sunflower seed butter
- 1 cup pepitas
- 3 eggs, whisked
- 1/2 cup coconut oil, melted
- 1/4 cup raisins
- 1/4 cup pecans, roughly chopped (optional for nut free version)
- 1 tablespoon cinnamon
- 1 tablespoon raw honey
- 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
- pinch of salt
Instructions
- Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
- Now add your pepitas to a small saucepan over medium heat with a tablespoon of fat. I used coconut oil.
- Cook for 3-5 minutes, moving around lots so they don’t burn and so they cook on all sides.
- While your pepitas are roasting, add your apple and carrot to your food processor with the shredding attachment. If you don’t have a food processor, use a grater to shred your apple and carrot.
- Add your apple and carrot to a bowl along with your sunflower seed butter and rinse out your food processor bowl.
- Then add your roasted pepitas to the food processor and puree until you get a flour/meal.
- Then add your pepita flour, eggs, coconut oil, honey, raisins, pecans, cinnamon, salt, and baking soda. Mix well.
- Pour your batter into 9 FULL muffin liners in your muffin tin. I lined my muffins tin with silicone muffin liners but paper would do just fine.
- Bake for 25-30 minutes until cooked through.
- Let cool slightly, but eat warm, because they are the best that way.
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More Nut Free Muffins:
Apple Cinnamon Muffins (nut free)
Chocolate Chip Protein Muffins (nut free)
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Juli,
I think you are just beautiful…not to mention an absolute doll!
I just wanted to add my experience with accutane since it usually gets such a bad rap. Nothing ever worked for me, no BCP no diet, nothing and I eventually decided to try accutane. I had little to NO side effects, aside from dry nose and mouth. I took a blood test every month and took accutane for 6 months, I have never had to do anything to my skin since. I dont even get pimples anymore, I’ll get the occasional blackhead or whitehead.
Just wanted to share, I’ve been there and I’m glad I decided to try accutane if anything, you can always stop. I think it is worth some consideration.
Without being at all medically qualified, I couldn’t recommend roaccutane (what its called in the uk) enough. I tried literally everything for my skin including OTC and prescription meds, topicals, every old wives tail, birth control, and nothing worked for more than a brief and slight improvement for a couple of weeks. I took roaccutane for 5 months last year and the improvement was insane, I never have problems anymore and people actually comment on how good my skin is. I save about 30 min every morning because thats how long it was taking me to cover up. I didn’t have any problems with depression, and my only side effects were (a) dry skin, including minor nosebleeds and cracked lips (but the flp side of this is that your hair dries out a it too, so you don’t have to wash it so much – still don’t in fact – bonus) and (b) it turned my pee yellow, which doesn’t seem to have changed back since – no idea what that’s about. I made sure I drank a ton of water (like 4litres a day) and my doctor gave me some amazing cream for my lips. It is a serious drug and the monthly appointments were annoying (although reassuring to know that you’re not preggers I suppose). The hardest thing was not drinking (not sure what that says about me), although after a few months my doc did concede that I could have a few glasses of wine (read: jaeger) on special occasions eg New Years. Longest comment ever, but in summary: what do you have to lose by trying it? You can always stop if the side effects are that bad!
You need to decide for you! I’ve used Accutane and it really worked for me with hardly any side effects except dryness. What I hated about acne was the pain of the cysts – in my neck, ears, between my eyebrows! I still eat paleo, still exercise a lot, had tried
EVERYTHING else (I even found an awesome boyfriend :)). BUT its your body and your decision!
Hey Juli,
I was put on Zinc by my doctor (for an unrelated thing) and my skin has improved alot… worth a try as its way less aggressive than acutane.
Getting rid of my acne needed a narrower diet than paleo. If I eat nuts that have not been soaked and dehydrated, or if I consume small amounts of oils with a poor omega 6 to omega 3 ratio (i.e most nut oils and many unsaturated oils) I will get acne. If I don’t, my skin is completely clear.
Also, if I eat sprouted einkorn flour, my skin will absolutely glow, and this is despite being sensitive to gluten and everything else remotely gluten-like (casein and I suspect even albumin). It’s not paleo but it does wonders for me.
As a general set of guidelines, paleo alone works for most people by merit of eliminating tons of problematic foods, but it still allows for many foods that bother some people. Before you try something drastic like accutane, maybe check out information on specific foods in Whole 30, SCD, and Weston A Price communities. You might have been simplifying to be brief, but it sounds like it’s possible you’ve focused mostly on macronutrients (amount of fat or sugar) and not as much specific foods or specific compounds in those foods — or, another thing to consider, preparation methods for the foods. For example, if you soak and dehydrate your nuts, that seriously might get rid of your acne. I didn’t think things like that made a difference until I did it and my problems began to go away. Another example: eating raw nuts is less problematic usually because the fats in them are prone to oxidation when they are cooked, so only using nuts in no-bake recipes might be necessary. More oxidized fats can definitely lead to acne.
Also, consider that you might be allergic or otherwise somewhat intolerant of coconut; I know I can’t tolerate coconut oil very well at all, and I can only barely tolerate homemade coconut milk (guar and xanthum gums mess me up in the canned kinds). I know some paleo sites (I think I first read it on MDA) say not to sweat gum additives, but many people have to pay attention to those. They’re easy to ignore if they don’t cause stomach distress but as you’ve come to find out, something is giving you acne without stomach distress.
So I would start by looking at specific kinds of fat, and how you’re using it. Soak and dehydrate your nuts (they taste better) and try to use cashews and walnuts for better omega ratios or low levels of omegas instead of almonds, which are high in omega 6s. I’ve tried a lot of your recipes substituting soaked and dehydrated cashews and walnuts and they’re still delicious. 🙂 And try not cooking with nuts or any unsaturated fats at all.
Good luck, eliminating stuff sucks but so does having acne and I’m totally sympathetic to all those intrusive “I hate my face” thoughts because I used to have acne, often cystic, and visibly oily skin. Before I changed my diet I began the oil cleansing method which I still use today and it eliminated much of the oiliness, but all the stuff above is what took me the final step.
In case you’re curious, the fats I cook with are organic nitrate free bacon drippings, ghee, and sometimes butter. Every now and then I will cook with olive oil BRIEFLY and over low heat, but I reserve it for salad dressing. I also use macadamia oil for salad dressing sometimes. I use duck fat if I’ve made duck recently. And that’s it.
I have not found that sugar or starch does anything to my complexion, low or high. I had acne just as bad on low carb and low and moderate carb versions of paleo. I eat moderate carb now — I eat fruit several times a day and sometimes just straight up eat like several tablespoons of raw buckwheat honey, and sometimes even veer into high carb since potatoes don’t even raise my blood sugar — and my skin looks fab. That may not be the case for everyone but I have found that bad fats is what bombs my complexion.
Oh, I should add that everything I said about nuts here applies to seeds as well: while nuts have their own set of allergens, pay attention to omega ratios in seeds, soak and dehydrate them, and don’t cook with them because they have all that in common. At least to see if it makes a difference, anyway; I really think it will.
Juli-
Where is your acne? Where the acne is tells a lot about what is causing it. I had the same problem. No matter how much I cleaned up my diet my acne did not get better until I found out about my reaction to eggs. I see that you have a lot of egg recipies posted on your site. Maybe try elimating them for a couple weeks. Everytime I ate out I also started to have minor reactions as well. I blamed all the seed oils but maybe the resturants used eggs for their sauces??
I am a firm believer in accutane. It changed my life. I had awful acne and I didn’t want to leave my house. Having horrible skin made me very depressed. 🙁 I think skin issues are genetic and food/OTC treatments will only do so much. After taking accutane my skin didn’t breakout for an entire year. Now my skin will rarely breakout. Once my skin was clear, I worked on improving the scars with dermabrasion and microdermabrasion. Good luck! I love your recipes!!
Try Sun Chlorella, It is amazing!
I was on Accutane a few years ago, while doing Crossfit. It was really difficult to stay on top of things, only because I don’t typically drink tons of water, and Accutane forces your body towards dehydration. It dries you out. I hated it while I was on it – I could feel the achiness in my joints and muscles because they didn’t get enough hydration, and I would occasionally get dry skin (Which burns like hell when you sweat!), but in the end, it was so worth it! I cut dairy out shortly after starting accutane (Started paleo), which also helped make my acne cysts go away, and I haven’t had trouble since.