You guys. Sometimes internships are really important. And helpful for people who are entering the real world. But the place I’m not comfortable with having an intern is during my annual pap. Yep, that’s how I’m starting this blog post. A couple weeks ago, I had literally the most awkward pap of my life. Usually, they take like 5 minutes. With an intern there, it took almost 20 minutes. 20 minutes with 2 people gazing into my soul. No ok. She couldn’t even find the one thing she was looking for up there. They kept telling me to just relax. Um, ma’ams, you’re asking me to relax when you have 4 eyes searching for an object that seems foreign to you? You’re high. I’m requesting no intern next year. She will have to learn anatomy on another human.

Let’s catch up! About stuff other than my pap. Sorry I haven’t had a ton of new recipes for you recently! With my traveling schedule along with working on a new project for you guys, my creativity hasn’t been at an all time high. But don’t you worry, that will change before you know it and all my attention will be on you guys, you needy only child. Oh wait, that’s me. Coming up with new recipes is just hard sometimes. I feel like I’ve made everything possible within paleo’s boring perimeters, but then thankfully I pull something new out of my ass.

Other things that have been happening: I’ve started to look for a house to actually buy. Such a grown up thing to do. From 2006 to today, I’ve lived in 7 different apartments/homes, all renting. Nowadays, I live in one of the hip and up-and-coming neighborhoods. Up-and-coming means people who are shooting up and tripping balls are around the corner, but you still pay a lot for your apartment. It doesn’t make much sense, but I do have an exciting nightlife outside of my back door. Sadly, I’m not much into nightlife anymore. I’m in to sleeping. Sleeping is pretty much the greatest thing of all time. But people are partying until 2am then work traffic picks up at 6am, that gives a night silence of 4 hours. Which is usually interrupted by sirens for the people that were shooting up all night on the street corner. You get what I’m sayin’? I need suburbs. Not like the hills of Golden suburbs, because I grew up in a neighborhood like that, but suburbs that are still at least 10 minutes from downtown. It makes me feel less old that way. I’ll probably never drive downtown, but knowing that I could, makes me feel like I’m not being an old fart. I just can’t wait to walk Jackson around a neighborhood that I don’t constantly have to pull him away from someone’s vomit. It’s the little things.

Don’t you hate when you google something you don’t want other people to see, then it pops up on one of the ads of a website you’re looking at? The worst. Thank the lord I’m not googling STD’s. My pap intern would have been real freaked out. Too far?


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Protein Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

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4.8 from 24 reviews

  • Yield: 16-18 1x




  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
  2. Add all ingredients in bowl and mix well until combined.
  3. Use a cookie scoop or tablespoon to scoop out batter and place on a parchment paper lined baking sheet. The batter should make 16-18 cookies.
  4. Baking for 15-18 minutes until cooked through.

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PaleOMG Protein Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

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  1. Adriana says:

    I am allergic to whey. Do you think this would work with a chocolate flavored beef/egg protein?

    1. juli says:

      i’m sure it would!

  2. Riley says:

    Excuse me, but chocolate chips aren’t paleo… I can’t eat dairy and I don’t eat sugar. Is there special type of chip you use? Thanks.

    1. juli says:

      you don’t have to use them at all!

  3. Butterweed says:

    It is 2021 and here I am again, making these cookies because it’s almost Fall (almost Fall is good enough, right). Have I mentioned this is one of my favorite recipes.