Ummmmmm to the people who said changing your name isn’t a pain the ass, YOU’RE A LIAR. Straight up. It is a complete pain. And it takes so much effing time. I keep hearing, “Oh, I just took an entire day off work to get it done.” Well, I work for myself. So when I take time off, I’m actually losing money since I’m not working. No PTO for me! After using a website a friend told me about and getting 43% done, I had to take a break and walk away. And I haven’t gone back to it in over 5 days. It does all your bank, mortgage, IRS, SS, etc. etc. etc. paperwork but it never ends. I ended up getting so annoyed that my husband didn’t have to do anything and I found myself mad at him for no reason. Especially since I said I wanted to change my name. I want to take his name, but I don’t want to take the steps to get there. I will, but I will b*tch every second along the way. That’s totally normal, right? Going with yes.
So far, being married has been completely the same as just being in a relationship. Except now we have to review big purchases with each other. But other than that, nothing is different. Oh wait, I’m also asked 7 times per day when we are having kids. EVERYONE asks us that. Us meaning me. I think it’s just a conversation starter for people who can’t think of anything better to talk about me, but for me, it’s an awkward topic. I don’t feel the need for children, at all, but then when I hear people talk about it constantly, it gives me anxiety that I SHOULD feel the need to have children. So it’s this constant internal battle of figuring out what is right for US instead of what society is telling us.
The children stuff just really freaks me out. We are at the first point in our lives that we can save money, we can go on little trips together, we can go out late or sleep in or be hungover. We can do whatever we want to do and giving that up is just way too scary at this point. Please don’t tell me that it’s totally worth it. I get it. I’m sure it is. But going on a trip to New Zealand on a whim is way more worth it to me at this point. I don’t know if that feeling will ever change. What I know definitely won’t ever change is the look on people’s faces when they ask me about kids and I say “EW”. That look is priceless.
Speaking of priceless, GUESS WHAT?! I got a belated wedding gift from a friend recently and it’s something I’ve ALWAYS wanted. Always but never pulled the trigger…a Kitchen Aid Mixer! Squeeeeeeeee! I have most kitchen toys, but I just could never bring myself to put down the money for a mixer. And she just bought me a teal one that matches the cover of my third cookbook! I die. I love it so much! But now I have to figure out what to make first in it. I think it will be cupcakes…because cupcakes. What’s your favorite thing to make in your mixer? Tell me stuff, inspire me, give me ideas! I need you, amazing readers!!!
Have you guys tried Pacific Foods Bone Broth yet? The ingredients are crazy simple, only using water, chicken, onion, cider vinegar and rosemary extract! So instead of having to boil your ingredients to build your stock (especially on a hot summer day), all you have to do is add Pacific Foods Bone Broth to any recipe for a healthy and delicious flavor. They also have a turkey broth AND broths with added flavors such as lemongrass or ginger! The broth even has 9 grams of protein per serving so you’re feeling fuller longer with the help of this broth!
Simple Summer Squash Soup
- Yield: 4-6 1x
Ingredients
- 3 tablespoons ghee
- 1 sweet onion, minced
- 3 garlic cloves, minced
- 2 zucchinis, chopped
- 2 yellow squash, chopped
- 32 fluid ounces Pacific Foods Chicken Bone Broth
- 1 teaspoon dried thyme
- 1 teaspoon dried oregano
- 1 teaspoon dried rosemary
- 1 teaspoon salt
- juice of half a lemon
- handful of parsley + extra for garnish
- olive oil, to garnish
Instructions
- Place a large dutch oven over medium heat. Add ghee along with onion, garlic, zucchini and squash and let cook for about 10-12 minutes, until onion is translucent.
- Then add bone broth, thyme, oregano, rosemary, and salt, cover and let cook for 20-25 minutes, until zucchini and squash are fork tender.
- Remove from heat to let cool before transferring to a high speed blender. Add lemon juice and a small handful of parsley to the pot to mix. Then once slightly cooled, pour half the soup mixture into a blender and blend until smooth. (I used my Blendtec and turned it on the soup setting to get it completely smooth.) Blend the other half of the soup mixture as well.
- Garnish with parsley leaves and olive oil!
In Partnership With:
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More Of My Favorite Soups:
Creamy Cauliflower Shrimp Chowder
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I’d like to tell you that the children thing changes but it doesn’t, it only seems to get worse the longer you are married. We got married really young and people immediately were asking when we’d have kids. We’ve been married six years now, and still no kids. It just hasn’t been important to us. I think you should wait till (or IF) you really want them. It seems like you see a lot of miserable parents who had kids too quickly, or before they REALLY wanted them. There is NOTHING wrong with waiting and enjoying being married and having a husband, it’s a blast. You just have to be able to let the rude comments roll off you. It isn’t selfish, and it isn’t anyone else’s business, honestly. It’s your life! And IF you get to the point where you want kids… great! And IF not, then it’s your life, you will find amazing, rewarding, lovely things to fill your time! Haters gonna hate, don’t let them pressure you into something.
Yum this looks great! My fiance and I talk about possibly having children one day, but aren’t ready anytime soon.
I understand your side but I also know so many people without kids who talk negatively about people who have kids or want kids. It all drives me crazy. i’m not sure why people care so much about other people’s decisions. ESPECIALLY people who aren’t even close to them!
You do you, girl!
MAN i can relate to this post on so many levels!
1) the name change thing was SUCH a bitch! even two years later, I haven’t fully changed *everything* to my married name.
2) the “when are the kids coming?!” question happens way way way too much, especially since I started law school. I am 24 years old and have been completely shocked with people giving unsolicited advice about having kiddos before I “run out of time”. um..what?
You have Jackson tho! Don’t people get that dogs are just fur babies?
I don’t know why I thought of this joke when you’re talking about kids since it doesn’t really relate to kids but more to getting married…..”old people kept poking me at weddings and saying you’re next…..so I started doing the same thing to them at funerals…”. Having children is a deeply personal choice so never ever apologize for what’s right for you and your marriage at this time. I don’t know why society tends to push having kids on newlyweds. I guess it’s something else to look forward to as in following suit of how an adult life should go….first love, then marriage, then baby carriage. You’re not alone in your decision to not have kids at this time or ever. Just don’t let yourself feel bad for your choices!
I really want to have kids and I’m turning 30 this August… but my husband and I agreed that we would enjoy our marriage for a few years before we started trying. We’ve been married for 2 years now and we traveled to Nicaragua for our honeymoon, Italy last fall, and we’re going to Hawaii this Sept! Most of our friends have had kids in the last year or two… and most of them have been jealous of our trips. But I do have this worry in the back of my mind that it will be hard for us to conceive and then I will regret waiting… or zika will blow up here in the next year :/ But I’m sure everything will work out how it’s supposed to.
WHY DO PEOPLE ASK THAT?! I really don’t get it. My hub’s and I have been married for 4 years and really have no plans for kids yet…maybe ever. I’m not there and not even close. I hate that society pushes that. One more reason to just give society the bird haha.
Ugh. I feel you on the kid front. No matter how prepared I am for the question, I never know what to say/how to react. I’m 25, been married for just over a year and it’s quite irritating being constantly hounded. I feel for you!
Okay so on to the soup, I am so excited for it. As I was reading the recipe, I was thinking of what kind of chicken/protein I could pair with it… I then clicked the link to the bone broth and learned it has 9 grams of protein per serving! That’s amazeballs. No side even needed! This will be my dinner every night next week. YES.
it’s honestly so fill on it’s own! i was so surprised at how full i felt with the amount i ate. hope you love it!!
I am about to turn 40 and never had children. It is single handedly the BEST, and I mean B E S T decision I have ever made. Think about how much child care and all that other crap costs? a lot. Now, imagine if you took all that money and invested it instead. IT was very much worth it for me. I look at my friends and co workers with kids struggling to get by, worried about retirement? Ha. I could retire tomorrow if I didn’t love my job so much. I dated a man for awhile and he had a child. I will never do that again!
So with you on the kid thing. I’ve been married for 7 years, I turn 35 next month – and everyone asks why we don’t have kids yet, and when are they coming. We’ve stopped answering the question, we smile and nod – and cheers them with the alcoholic drink that’s usually in our hand while they’re wiping some nasty random sticky off of their face, hands, etc. It’s no longer their business, and if they haven’t figured out the answer by now – well, it’s not my problem anymore. I don’t get why people don’t understand that it’s not their business, we don’t need or want their input, and we really are perfectly happy traveling, playing, drinking, sleeping, and working whenever we want. Between our two families we have 10 nieces and nephews. We’re good…
That soup looks AMAZING! I love every recipe of yours I’ve ever made (I bought your cookbook – it’s my favorite).
My husband and I were married 8 years (I was 34) before our first baby came along. We did incredible things in those eight years, traveled everywhere around the globe, bought a heritage home (built in 1924) and did ‘Grand Designs’ renovation on it. My husband ran his own business, I built a professional career. I will forever be grateful that we managed to do all those things before having our family because it means we never asked- What if????
We found we got to a stage we were just ready for life’s next experience because we had crossed alot of the list. What an experience parenthood is- nothing in your life will bring you as much joy or nearly as much love as a child.
It sounds to me that’s where you are at- still looking to experience more in your life. Don’t stress about the debate over having children- start enjoying being married and go create some experiences together!