Valentine’s Day is just around! That means half of the world will utterly hate their day and half of the world will be over the moon. Well wait, that number isn’t correct this year. Because part of the population, both single and not single, will be at the premiere of 50 Shades of Grey. This is how I feel about that: that’s weird. I just finished the first book and there is no way that I want to see that movie around anyone else. No way dude. I’m not going to sit in a theatre will 100+ other people who are thinking dirty thoughts. Ew. You know that probably 65% of the people in that one theatre at that one time are creepy human beings. That’s just fact. I’d much rather read the book in the privacy of a nail salon while I get a pedicure. Because that’s not creepy at all.
This vday is going to be more on the boring side for us. Because the fiancé has to work. Poop. So we are planning breakfast at Snooze that morning then I bought a roll of Cappello’s paleo cooking dough to make a GIANT half baked cookie topped with ice cream to eat by myself until he gets home from work. What are you going to do on Vday? Eat dessert with your friends? Creep at a movie? Make out with your lover? Tell me everything, except the creepy parts.
Doesn’t that book bum you out that you don’t have billions of dollars? And a plane that flies to the sun. Gosh damn it, Mr. Grey.
Omg. Did you guys watch The Bachelor the other night? I always have some comment on my blog after I talk about the Bachelor telling me that they’ve lost all respect for me…but that’s ok, many people have lost respect for me over the years. Like the day I recapped my brazilian wax experience. I still go on loving Monday night Bachelor sessions. Drama is hilarious to watch. But I get it, it’s fake so why watch it. BECAUSE IT’S HILARIOUS. And every Monday, a bunch of us girls get together to eat taco salads and dessert, talk about our lives on commercials and rewind constantly because we are laughing so hard at certain moments that we miss the sweet one liners. This is my favorite one liner: “I’m a virgin…but I’m not super serious about it.” You go girl. First you gotta impressive him with keeping your virginity, but if he’s not into that kind of thing, make sure he knows that you’ll give it up at any moment. I dig your style. And one girl told us at least 14 times how her husband died while creepily laughing about it. ABC did a good job making us believe she was a murderer. She had to go. You can’t give a rose to a fake murderer on your reality show! People would get pisssssed.
Oh how I’d love to work behind the scenes on one of those shows.
Guess what?? I just finished all of the recipes for my third cookbook, Juli Bauer’s Paleo Cookbook! I turned them in to the editor on Monday to get them off of my shoulders. I’ve now written 3 cookbooks in 3 years so I’m ready for a little break and ready to start concentrating on other things. Kind of. Like writing the front matter for this third book and really put my voice into it. That part definitely isn’t done. I want this book to really feel like my blog, but prettier, because Bill and Hayley from Primal Palate are doing the photography instead of me! And then I want to start concentrating on new recipes for the blog AND planning our wedding! 2015 is going to be an awesome year. I just know it!
Now let’s get Valentine’s Day chocolate wasted!!
Valentine’s Day Almond Butter Blondies
- Yield: 9 squares 1x
Ingredients
- 1 cup almond butter
- 1/4 cup honey
- 1/4 cup maple sugar or coconut sugar
- 1 egg
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
- pinch of sea salt
- 1/2 cup dark chocolate chips
Instructions
- Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
- Grease an 8×8 baking dish.
- Mix together all ingredients and fold in chocolate chips.
- Pour mixture into baking dish and spread out evenly
- Bake for 20-23 minutes (the top will seem a bit soft but will harden when cooled). Let cool for about 10 minutes before slicing.
- Eat with coconut milk ice cream. Duh.
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How ’bout Some Brownies?
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Do they freeze well? I want to save half of what I made for another day. Thoughts?
yep
These are amazing! I made two batches: one with maple syrup and the other coconut sugar. I recommend the maple syrup because the brownies are a bit more gooey….almost like a pazookie consistency. And they taste amazing with ice cream.
These are amazing.. I can eat the whole batch
Thanks Juli for your awesome recipe!..it was so good….and thanks for making it so easy. It is still hard for me to believe that a non flour recipe tastes like there is flour in it?? You rock!
Delicious ! I added some ground spices (cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg and clove) to make it taste like gingerbread, and it’s awesome 🙂
These
Are
Amazing
Period
My husband and my two super picky eating preschoolers agree! They ate the entire thing and licked the bowl as well.
Weare paleo newbies, just started a couple of weeks ago. Your recipes have been a tremendous help. I honestly thank God for you, for your recipes, and may you keep rockin it in these endeavours
I did for Christmas. I made peppermint candy cane ice cream–it was AMAZING! Just a find a recipe you love and throw it in the fridge. I put it in a glass bowl so that it would keep it extra cold. Had a really good ice creamy consistency.
I’m not sure what I’m doing wrong, but I’ve made these twice now and have had such a problem getting them done in the middle! They’re still delicious; I just go at the pan with a spoon haha, but help! I followed the recipe exactly, but mine don’t seem to come close to coming together in the middle until the next day.
Hi! I want to make these but my hubby has diabetes… How much of the syrup/honey can I take out without ruining the texture? Should I add an extra egg/egg yolk? Thanks!
i really don’t know, i haven’t changed the recipe up myself
These are amazing! I didn’t have any cocinut milk ice cream to enjoy with them, but I did pour a tiny bit of chilled unsweetened almond milk on top of the gooey fresh-out-of-the-oven blondie! SO good! You always hit it out of the park 🙂