Yep. Face is stillllllllll peeling. It’s really great. I just love it. Why wouldn’t I want to spend 3+ hours in the mirror a day picking at my face? Yes I know I’m not suppose to pick. But I look like Benjamin in his old/young days. That made no sense. I look like BenjieB when he was born and look like an 80 year old. Raking in those dudes. That’s all I do.
So last night, I curled up in my bed, happy as a clam then woke up rested AND STARVING. So I meandered on over to the kitchen to make some delicious coffee and decided to get balls deep in some peanut butter. I know it’s not paleo ya d*ck. But I felt like eating half my body weight in fat was the smart thing to do. Oh and I ate this coconut dessert recipe by Elana that I made over the weekened…on a Saturday night…by myself. Yeah, I’m THAT cool. But anyways, while consuming this peanut butter and coconut dessert, sometimes at the same time, I glanced over at the clock to find out….it was 2:45am. I was eating my body weight in fat at 2:45am. I felt like a failure. Then was pissed I had to go back to sleep. I’m like a drunken mess, minus the drunk part.
So I’m really trying to figure out what the hell I’m doing on Twitter. Still. I don’t exactly understand some of the things people are saying. I feel like how my parents must feel when I’m talking to them about CrossFit and it sounds like code. Reading some people’s Tweets and RT’s and #FF’s just doesn’t all make sense. I literally keep having to google what some of these trends mean. I’m 23 years old people. I should be pr-tothe-ofessional. But instead I find myself going into the ‘Help’ section on my Twitter account, daily. Or sometimes I text my friend Diego to ask him what the hell I’m doing. He’s a Tweet pro. Then I just hashtag every single word. What do you mean #of isn’t a trend?! You know nothing.
Wanna know what hands down is my favorite “paleo” chocolate cake in the world??! No, I’m not even kidding. I would honestly make this then hide it in my room, under my bed, just so Laura couldn’t have any. I’m that desperate for chocolate cake. It’s seriously THAT good. Check out this Easy Black and White Cake by Elana. If you’re pissed because it has white chocolate chips in it, you’re high. It’s totally worth it. I dream about it. My mouth is literally salivating as I type. I need to be careful. Salivating onto your keyboard is dangerous. Believe me, I would know.
Chocolate Cashew Butter
- Yield: 4+ 1x
Ingredients
- 2 cups dry roasted cashews
- 1/4 cup melted coconut oil (you can use walnut, almond, etc.)
- 2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
- 2 tablespoons raw honey
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1 teaspoon sea salt
Instructions
- Add your roasted cashews to your food processor and turn on. Let the food processor do it’s magic.
- When the cashews are become thicker and almost ball up into a ball of happiness, add your oil directly to your cashews while the food processor is still running.
- Once your get a runnier nut butter, turn food processor off, then add your cocoa powder, honey, vanilla, and salt.
- Turn back on to let everything incorporate.
- Add more oil if you want a more runny nut butter.
- Consume with anything. Apples. Carrots, On a burger. Serious. I just eat it by the spoonful. I’m classy.
_______________
You May Also Like:
Easy Chocolate Almond Butter Cups
_______________
Click Here To Get All My PaleOMG Recipes Into Your Meal Planner With Real Plans!
I may be compensated through my affiliate links in this post, but all opinions are my own. This compensation helps with expenses to keep this blog up and running!
Never stop hashtagging. It’s all the rage now-a-days.
More importantly, I’m super excited for this recipe. If there is anyone out there who has never made a PaleOMG nut butter, you’re missing out; They are friggen delicious
Hashtagging all day every day. Thanks for trying out my butter Kevin!! I’ll let you know when I come up with another one…thinking pumpkin pie maybe?!
YES!!
Besides, nothing masks that pesky pork scent like pumpkin pie.
soooooo true…or brownies….like i just made lol
Sounds delish, so pumped to try it
Let me know if you do JK!
You almost made me snort my seltzer water out of my nose.
Can’t wait to make this!
I don’t know what I said Alicia, but my whole cause of this post was to clear out your sinuses. YOU’RE WELCOME!!
this came at the PERFECT time I just bought cashews for the purpose to make cashew butter but couldnt find the right recipe! thank you 🙂
perfecto!! let me know how it turns out!
Can’t wait to make this Juli! Jut finished my jar of pecan coconut butter…so good. And the chicken butternut squash pesto…score.
yay!!! glad you liked it Mike!!
I pinned the shit out of those coconut bars, can’t wait to make those bastards.
Doesn’t it look awweeeeeesome?!
Omgosh, if you make a pumpkin pie butter, I will love you forever!! I eat nut butters by the spoonful, too. haha That Pecan Pie Butter on Health-Bent is legitttt, isn’t it?! Can’t wait to try this one- just gotta get some cashews….
Yeah Pecan Pie Butter was eppppic!! Let me know if you try it!
JULI-
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR POSTING THIS!!! MY BRIAN IS GOING TO BE SO EXCITED. He is soooo addicted to cashews!
Now thinkinkg of a random (and definitely weird) place to hide this jar of awesome nut butter to surprise him. Shower came to mind.
Melody
Hope he likes it!
Just found your website last week and love it. The hardest thing for me to give up when I started eating Paleo was PEANUT BUTTER. Imagine my excitement when I see your recipes for nut butters. Went out and bought a food processor over the weekend. Can’t wait for nut butters. You rock!!
Try the nut butter Debbie. They definitely are much better than peanut butter
Really easy to make + holy monkey tastey = this nut butter.
Woot woot! Glad you liked it Mike!!