I have a straight up issue right now. Legit ISH SHEW. Ok, so last week, I was being a really great friend and taking Sergio coffee. I bought two lattes at one of my favorite coffee shops then headed over towards Sergio’s house. It was snowing, again, so I was trying to get out of my car without getting slushed. So, to not get completely bombarded with yellow slushy snow, I placed one coffee on top of the other, kicked open my door, grabbed my purse, and sh*t got crazy. One of the coffees legit jumped out of my hand (meaning it fell off of the other coffee) and spilled everywhere (meaning the lid came off and completely poured out onto my car floor). I literally sat there screaming NOOOOOOOOOOOOO….OOOOO….OOO for a good 30 seconds, pretty much until I couldn’t breathe anymore. Then I stared at the coffee as it sunk into the carpet. Then I threw my scarf on top of it in a pitiful attempt to soak it up. It did nothing. Then I went on with my day. Hoping it would clear itself up. Welp, it’s been a week. I’m stupid. And my car smells like a dump truck. Legit dump. Not poo, just spoiled milk. I’m going to go get it detailed. They are going to hate me.
I had to snatch the sh*t out of things today. First 7 minutes of burpees, now 10 minutes of snatches. Look at you go CrossFit. WOD 12.2 was a doozy. Constantly snatching for 10 minutes is pretty damn hard. I’m excited for this wod to be over specifically so I can stop hearing all the snatch sexual innuendos and jokes going around at the gym. They aren’t original anymore. I’ve seen them on aboooout 65 different CrossFit shirts at this point. And every dude thinks he’s so creative when he makes a joke about it. Way to go guys. Way.to.be.
You know what’s weird about coffee cake? There’s no coffee in it. That’s kind of dumb. I mean, I’m guessing it was named that because people drank coffee with it? I don’t know. I guess we might as well call it donut cake. That makes sense. Since you eat coffee with donuts. Right? I don’t know what I’m saying. Either way, my coffee cake has coffee in it. I don’t mess around. Nor lie. So if you’re into coffee cake that doesn’t taste slightly like coffee, you’re not gonna be into this. And I won’t really be into you anyways.
I smell like bacon. Damnit.
Coconut Coffee Cake
- Yield: 4-6 1x
Ingredients
- 1/2 cup almond flour/meal
- 1/3 cup coconut flour
- 1/3 cup Unsweetended Shredded Coconut
- 1/2 cup coconut oil, melted
- 1/2 cup coconut milk
- 1/2 cup Chameleon Cold Brew Coffee
- 1/3 cup honey
- 4 eggs, whisked
- 2 teaspoon ground coffee
- 1 teaspoon baking soda
- 1 teaspoon baking powder
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
- pinch of salt
For the topping
- 1 cup sliced almonds
- 2 tablespoons coconut oil
- 2 tablespoons honey
- 1 tablespoon maple syrup
- 1 teaspoon cinnamon
- 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
- pinch of salt
Instructions
- Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
- Mix all dry ingredients: almond meal, coconut flour, shredded coconut, baking soda and baking powder, cinnamon, and salt.
- Then add your wet remaining ingredients to the dry ingredients. Mix together.
- Grease an 8×8 or 9×9 glass baking dish and pour into the dish.
- Bake for 25-30 minutes or until edges are browned and middle is completely cooked through.
- While your cake is cooking, pull out a large skillet and place over medium heat.
- Add your coconut oil then almonds. Mix to coat almonds.
- When the almonds begin to toast and have a bit of browning to them (be careful because they burn easily) add your honey, maple syrup, cinnamon, vanilla and salt and mix thoroughly.
- Cook for a couple minutes longer being sure not to burn the almonds, but remove from heat.
- Once cake is done cooking, top with almonds and slightly press down to help stick to the cake. Let cool then serve with some delicious Chameleon Cold Brew Coffee!
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I did ten minutes of snatches today too. Not so fun! Can’t wait to try this coffee cake!
Hope you rocked it Pam!!
Oh! Finally!!! I freaking always fail my attempt on going Paleo bc I NEED (ok ok, I want) something sweetish for my coffee!
Hope you try it Linnea!
Linnea,
I hate to sound like a complete stalker, but when I saw your name and that you were in CO I thought you might have been the same Linnea from CFBirmingham. I’m pretty sure we’ve been to the dog park together and done the Warrior Dash last spring, if this is not the same person, I apologize for the creepiness, if it is – it’s a small world!
Allison
I did ten minutes of snatches once… sorry i couldnt help myself. I deserve your disdain.
Look at you go Tyler, so classy
Why is smelling like bacon a bad thing???
Very true Samantha
Will you stop outdoing yourself?!?! This sounds so good!! The topping?! Wha what? So clever as a replacemt for brown sugar crumb bum. Cannot wait to try this tomorrow. Can I use regular brewed coffee or does it have to be ice brew? Thanks!
You already made it and it looks AWESOME Jeanne!!
This weekend is a weekend of paleomg! Rosemary apple pork burgers tonight, sweet tate fries, and roasted green bean fries. Since I passed my written test to get an Indiana license, I am no longer grounded from going to the farmer’s market this weekend (yes that’s a punishment) and after I plan on making this. I hate (not really) that you posted this because I am torn between the french toast and this coffee cake. Gah Juli…
I say french toast first!!!
Good luck with the WOD, I go back and forth between wishing I signed up for the open and being sort of happy that I didn’t when I hear what the WODs are haha. But I bet its a ton of fun and lots of positive support and energy going on in the gym.
Yeah it’s super fun! Next year you better!!
O…M…G… this is going to be amazing!!! I have to say, I have cooked my a$$ the past couple of days to stock up on meals and that Honey Ginger Apple Pulled Pork and Chicken Enchilada Stew are KEEPERS! Holy Sh!t, my house smelled awesome AND… the sh!t tastes amazing! All I can say is thank you JB.. you keep me supplied with the best tasting food (well, the recipes for it… I still have to make the sh!t)! Thank you, thank you, thank you… will be testing this recipe this weekend along with the banana (yes, I just sounded that out too) bread french toast! Hope you killed the snat..es (won’t even say it)! Enjoy your trip to CA and hope to see some more awesome posts!
Let me know what you think!! Glad you have liked the recipes!!
meant… cooked my a$$ off… left out that word… was too excited about posting my comments on the food! 🙂
I once split a protein shake made w milk down my centre console, in the summer! It was dee-sgusting.
A year later I did the exact same thing you did w the coffee, but luckily I had my gym bag with my dirty towel so i sopped it up with that.
whoa i just realized how ridiculously clutsy i am~
luv ur site & recipes I spend most wknds cookin up ur sh*t & i havent been disappointed yet!
Thanks so much Jkauz! I got my car detailed today. thank god.