I have a straight up issue right now. Legit ISH SHEW. Ok, so last week, I was being a really great friend and taking Sergio coffee. I bought two lattes at one of my favorite coffee shops then headed over towards Sergio’s house. It was snowing, again, so I was trying to get out of my car without getting slushed. So, to not get completely bombarded with yellow slushy snow, I placed one coffee on top of the other, kicked open my door, grabbed my purse, and sh*t got crazy. One of the coffees legit jumped out of my hand (meaning it fell off of the other coffee) and spilled everywhere (meaning the lid came off and completely poured out onto my car floor). I literally sat there screaming NOOOOOOOOOOOOO….OOOOO….OOO for a good 30 seconds, pretty much until I couldn’t breathe anymore. Then I stared at the coffee as it sunk into the carpet. Then I threw my scarf on top of it in a pitiful attempt to soak it up. It did nothing. Then I went on with my day. Hoping it would clear itself up. Welp, it’s been a week. I’m stupid. And my car smells like a dump truck. Legit dump. Not poo, just spoiled milk. I’m going to go get it detailed. They are going to hate me.
I had to snatch the sh*t out of things today. First 7 minutes of burpees, now 10 minutes of snatches. Look at you go CrossFit. WOD 12.2 was a doozy. Constantly snatching for 10 minutes is pretty damn hard. I’m excited for this wod to be over specifically so I can stop hearing all the snatch sexual innuendos and jokes going around at the gym. They aren’t original anymore. I’ve seen them on aboooout 65 different CrossFit shirts at this point. And every dude thinks he’s so creative when he makes a joke about it. Way to go guys. Way.to.be.
You know what’s weird about coffee cake? There’s no coffee in it. That’s kind of dumb. I mean, I’m guessing it was named that because people drank coffee with it? I don’t know. I guess we might as well call it donut cake. That makes sense. Since you eat coffee with donuts. Right? I don’t know what I’m saying. Either way, my coffee cake has coffee in it. I don’t mess around. Nor lie. So if you’re into coffee cake that doesn’t taste slightly like coffee, you’re not gonna be into this. And I won’t really be into you anyways.
I smell like bacon. Damnit.
Coconut Coffee Cake
- Yield: 4-6 1x
Ingredients
- 1/2 cup almond flour/meal
- 1/3 cup coconut flour
- 1/3 cup Unsweetended Shredded Coconut
- 1/2 cup coconut oil, melted
- 1/2 cup coconut milk
- 1/2 cup Chameleon Cold Brew Coffee
- 1/3 cup honey
- 4 eggs, whisked
- 2 teaspoon ground coffee
- 1 teaspoon baking soda
- 1 teaspoon baking powder
- 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
- 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
- pinch of salt
For the topping
- 1 cup sliced almonds
- 2 tablespoons coconut oil
- 2 tablespoons honey
- 1 tablespoon maple syrup
- 1 teaspoon cinnamon
- 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
- pinch of salt
Instructions
- Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
- Mix all dry ingredients: almond meal, coconut flour, shredded coconut, baking soda and baking powder, cinnamon, and salt.
- Then add your wet remaining ingredients to the dry ingredients. Mix together.
- Grease an 8×8 or 9×9 glass baking dish and pour into the dish.
- Bake for 25-30 minutes or until edges are browned and middle is completely cooked through.
- While your cake is cooking, pull out a large skillet and place over medium heat.
- Add your coconut oil then almonds. Mix to coat almonds.
- When the almonds begin to toast and have a bit of browning to them (be careful because they burn easily) add your honey, maple syrup, cinnamon, vanilla and salt and mix thoroughly.
- Cook for a couple minutes longer being sure not to burn the almonds, but remove from heat.
- Once cake is done cooking, top with almonds and slightly press down to help stick to the cake. Let cool then serve with some delicious Chameleon Cold Brew Coffee!
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Dearest Juli Bauer,
I love you. Full stop. This recipe is on my list of things to try in the next week. Also, THANK you for inspiring me to learn handstand pushups. I suck at them at the moment. I can maybe do ten in a set only sinking down about 2 inches at a time… But they’ll get better as I go. Cheers!
If I can learn, you totally can too Wendy!!
You going to make me go to the leaderboard to see that you put up more reps than Froning? Damn dude is straight up strong.
I like that guy’s snatch (bet you haven’t heard that one).
Better you look than me Tom! I haven’t actually put my score in yet. My coach may make me do it again…eeesh
It seems like a difficult recipe, but It’s worth of trouble I suppose. It really looks amazing and these almonds fits just perfectly. Great job.
It’s just a good amount of ingredients, still pretty easy to put together!
Hi!!! I’m doing a 30-day challenge of a Paleo diet…and I just made your coffee cake! I can’t wait to cut a piece of the cake! Your recipes are making the diet change much more exciting!! Can’t wait to try some of your other recipes!
How did it turn out Myracha!?
IT WAS AMAZING!!! Everyone loved it! Those who are paleo and those who aren’t. There were only one or two slices left (which I plan on consuming today). Thanks so much for the recipe! Definitely going to make it again! Super excited to try some of your other recipes!
omg, you totally crack me up with your posts.. literally, I can picture you sitting here with me at my kitchen table over a cup of coffee…. hopefully not spilling the crap out of it. but you just make my day.. thanks for the great food,but thanks for sharing your stories and making me smile 🙂
Glad I could make you smile Dannielle 🙂
Huge success! Before I headed to the farmer’s market I warmed up the coconut milk, added a touch of rum flavoring and soaked some raisins in it. Tossed everything in to the mix, and the cook time was perfect. I also whipped up a small bowl of Melissa’s maple vanilla frosting (http://www.theclothesmakethegirl.com/2011/11/15/paleo-pumpkin-gingerbread-cake-with-maple-vanilla-frosting/). It was phenomenal! And husband bought like 10 lbs of bananas so hopefully a few will survive long enough to be perfect for the banana bread french toast.
Glad you liked it Meaghan!! That sounds amazing!!
Love it! This blog rocks! Your recipes, attitude, and personality are wonderful and humorous. Thank you for sharing the good bad and smelly with us! Blessings!
Gena
Lol thanks for listening to my rants Gena!
I spilled milky coffee in my car once too… It really sucked when it started to stink– I was pregnant (1st trimester–helloo nausea!) at the time, and working nights. Had to drive in to work in that car trying desperately not to puke…
Lol that sounds awful Danielle
Looking forward to making this !!! It sounds and looks delicious! Good luck on 12.3!!
Thanks so much!
Just checked you out on the CrossFit Games page…you are rocking it (and you are so humble about your very impressive scores)!!! Keep up the awesome work!!! And, of course, thanks for sharing all of your wonderful recipes!! Can’t wait to try this one!
haha Thanks Nicole! Glad you are liking the recipes!