GUESS WHAT?! I have the winners of the Goodbody Giveaway!! Yaaaaaayy!! I told you to post comments that made me laugh or smile. And these two winners did!! Heather just flat out made me laugh. And Emily wrote a legit poem. What a badass…that has a lot of time on her hands. I like her.

Heather:

‘Gluten makes me sweaty. I love cookies. Sometimes I break down and eat said cookies. I sweat all night. My bedsheets stink. Gluten free cookies = problem solved.’

Emily:

“Pale-OH MY GOD
This girl is awesome, have you seen her bod?

She says she’s single but I can’t see why
Who else do you know that can create a paleo pie?!

Recipe upon recipe she can write,
She’s writing her own cookbook so she must be bright.

Her humor is quirky
And I really hope this poem will work-y

I’m trying to pretend I know how to write
All because I want those damn cookie bites.

… If this isn’t pathetic than I don’t know what is.’

If you are a Heather or an Emily, check your inbox since I sent the email asking for your personal info. Creeeeepy. Are you sad you’re not the winner? That’s ok! Be a good person and give back to small businesses. You can purchase Goodbody Baked Goods right here! You WILL NOT regret it!!

Anywho! I need to get something off my chest. I hate bluetooth headsets. Ok wait, if you’re driving then that’s ok. But if you’re walking around the grocery store or sitting next to me at Starbucks with a headset in, on the ear I can’t see, I will automatically think you’re a weirdo. Understand one thing, I work on a street that is infamous for drunks and homeless people. That means I see people babbling to themselves about 16 times a day. Those people usually lack shirts and cannot make human eye contact, but still, I consider them crazy. So, if you are next to me while I order my coffee and are having a conversation, I will automatically think you are insane and create space between you and I. I’m just being honest. You high tech psycho.

I feel like I’m uncool because I don’t wear half shirts. You know the shirts that are high cut so your belly button shows. Yeah, I can’t wear those. Why? Because I’m not cool. Or hip. Or a size zero. Or even brave enough for that sh*t. I try to be in style then the style changes to a teeny bopper style and I can’t keep up. And I know I’m offending all of you that wear those shirts, but it’s ok, because my roommate/best friend sports those kind of shirts. So I can do that. It’s my blog. And my best friend.

Are you bored with this recipe? I am too, kind of. But here’s the thing. I leave out of town today so I don’t have much real food in the house other than leftovers. So I’m eating old salmon, arugula, plantain chips, and bacon and eggs. Why the f*ck am I complaining? All that stuff sounds divine. Problem is, it’s not super blog worthy. So I had to yank this recipe out of my ass…gross visual…and add anything I had in my pantry to it. But it was wonderful. Bananas AND figs?!? Shut the front door. I just shed a tear.

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Fig and Banana Protein Shake (and Goodbody giveaway winners!!)

5 Stars 4 Stars 3 Stars 2 Stars 1 Star

5 from 5 reviews

  • Yield: 1 1x

Ingredients

Scale
  • 1 banana
  • 68 dried figs
  • 812 ounces carton coconut milk (or almond milk)
  • 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
  • 1 large scoop Vanilla Primal Fuel

Instructions

  1. Place all ingredients in a food processor or blender.
  2. Turn food processor or blender on.
  3. Puree until completely broken down and mixed together.
  4. Drink.
  5. Be merry.

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21 Comments

  1. Danielle says:

    You actually made a protein shake sound appealing. Therefore, you win. 🙂






  2. Josie @ Clean-Eatz says:

    I hate the Bluetooth too. People at work do that all the time, I walk into the break room and think they’re talking to me, then I feel like the weirdo due to me starting to talk to someone not even talking to me. I’ve started to make it a point to stare these people down like they’re crazy weirdo’s in hopes that they’ll get the point.

  3. Dawnette Hahn Arsht says:

    Juli,

    On the recovery fuel, There seems to be only Chocolate or Raspberry. Am I looking at the wrong item. I am recovery proteins.

    I love your blog! and your recipes. <3

  4. Natalie @ FreshLifeFindings says:

    So I just found your blog and am loving it. Just watched your Pumpkin Cashew Coconut Curry video and died laughing. You are a food inspiration! Excited to try out your recipes 🙂






  5. David R. says:

    Tthis protein shake is the bomb… never made anything with figs before… but this will definitely be a repeat shake for me!

    Thanks JB!






  6. Kari says:

    Amazing shake, my coconut milk wasn’t cold so I put the finished shake in the fridge for when I can back from working out! 🙂






  7. Stephanie Giese says:

    I just made this (I’m drinking it right now) and it is AMAZING!

  8. Josh says:

    Figs are now officially my new favorite fruit. This was DELICIOUS and SO easy. I could throw this together as fast as I was making my protein shakes originally. Just what I need in the morning. Thank you!