GUESS WHAT?! I have the winners of the Goodbody Giveaway!! Yaaaaaayy!! I told you to post comments that made me laugh or smile. And these two winners did!! Heather just flat out made me laugh. And Emily wrote a legit poem. What a badass…that has a lot of time on her hands. I like her.
Heather:
‘Gluten makes me sweaty. I love cookies. Sometimes I break down and eat said cookies. I sweat all night. My bedsheets stink. Gluten free cookies = problem solved.’
Emily:
“Pale-OH MY GOD
This girl is awesome, have you seen her bod?
She says she’s single but I can’t see why
Who else do you know that can create a paleo pie?!
Recipe upon recipe she can write,
She’s writing her own cookbook so she must be bright.
Her humor is quirky
And I really hope this poem will work-y
I’m trying to pretend I know how to write
All because I want those damn cookie bites.
… If this isn’t pathetic than I don’t know what is.’
If you are a Heather or an Emily, check your inbox since I sent the email asking for your personal info. Creeeeepy. Are you sad you’re not the winner? That’s ok! Be a good person and give back to small businesses. You can purchase Goodbody Baked Goods right here! You WILL NOT regret it!!
Anywho! I need to get something off my chest. I hate bluetooth headsets. Ok wait, if you’re driving then that’s ok. But if you’re walking around the grocery store or sitting next to me at Starbucks with a headset in, on the ear I can’t see, I will automatically think you’re a weirdo. Understand one thing, I work on a street that is infamous for drunks and homeless people. That means I see people babbling to themselves about 16 times a day. Those people usually lack shirts and cannot make human eye contact, but still, I consider them crazy. So, if you are next to me while I order my coffee and are having a conversation, I will automatically think you are insane and create space between you and I. I’m just being honest. You high tech psycho.
I feel like I’m uncool because I don’t wear half shirts. You know the shirts that are high cut so your belly button shows. Yeah, I can’t wear those. Why? Because I’m not cool. Or hip. Or a size zero. Or even brave enough for that sh*t. I try to be in style then the style changes to a teeny bopper style and I can’t keep up. And I know I’m offending all of you that wear those shirts, but it’s ok, because my roommate/best friend sports those kind of shirts. So I can do that. It’s my blog. And my best friend.
Are you bored with this recipe? I am too, kind of. But here’s the thing. I leave out of town today so I don’t have much real food in the house other than leftovers. So I’m eating old salmon, arugula, plantain chips, and bacon and eggs. Why the f*ck am I complaining? All that stuff sounds divine. Problem is, it’s not super blog worthy. So I had to yank this recipe out of my ass…gross visual…and add anything I had in my pantry to it. But it was wonderful. Bananas AND figs?!? Shut the front door. I just shed a tear.
Fig and Banana Protein Shake (and Goodbody giveaway winners!!)
- Yield: 1 1x
Ingredients
- 1 banana
- 6–8 dried figs
- 8–12 ounces carton coconut milk (or almond milk)
- 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
- 1 large scoop Vanilla Primal Fuel
Instructions
- Place all ingredients in a food processor or blender.
- Turn food processor or blender on.
- Puree until completely broken down and mixed together.
- Drink.
- Be merry.
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Mmm this looks awesome! I’ve been trying to use protein powders after WODs / lifting. Even though it’s not PURE paleo! Oh no! But I can’t stomach real food for hours and realized I needed something to help recover. Winner! Thanks! Too bad I’m not a winner of cookies though…
I do that crap all the time too! I also start talking to people with blue-tool sets on. They walk up next to me and I hear “hey, hows it going” and off I go on a conversation with someone who isnt even talking to me. Morons.
i noticed you said carton of coconut milk – what brand do you use? the only carton i know of is “so delicious” brand and it has a bunch of other stuff in it, i assumed you only used cans. thanks!
I use the silk unsweetened. It has some random stuff in it but nothing that will be troublesome. But if you’re not a fan of that, you could also use canned coconut milk and add some water to it
Or you could make your own. Dried coconut + hot water + blender = coconut milk. It is a bit thinner like the carton kind, make sure you have a fine strainer to get the chunks out though.
this sounds delicious! i can’t do figs though. can i sub dates?
surely!!
Omg I hate those freakin half shirts. Seriously no one can wear those that actually eats on a daily basis or who isn’t 12 years old. Why can’t I find normal size shirts when I go to forever 21, GOD (Napoleon dynamite voice)
Wait, you know people who actually wear half shirts…out…in public? I thought that was only on the movies…
Pssh, whatever, I rock those half shirts all day. Ok…no I don’t, that’d be really weird. I found going sleeveless to be strange enough. I’m glad two people won cookies, and the other 100 of us aren’t funny, *sadface.* I actually looked for those cookies in whole foods and couldn’t find them *sadface 2.0.* Looks like online Ordery-ness is in my futah!
I freaking love figs…and bananas….and protein. I also love the fact that I’m not the only one living off of random meals (i had chicken breast and plantain chips last night for dinner) because I am going out of town. But what I love most of all is that I’m not the only one who sees those half shirts and even though I love the person wearing it I can justify my hatred of the shirt. I read your blog daily and am often super excited that my judgements are justified by someone other than myself! 🙂
I also could not find those cookies at Whole Foods. Making a special trip to buy them seemed easier than trying to be funny. I love the half shirts. I look totally sweet in them when I wear them to pick up my kids at middle school. It’s pretty obvious when I see their friends whispering they’re talking about how cool I look.
“You high tech psycho.” May be the best line yet in a PaleOMG post. Agreed. Blue tooth wearing folks walking around the grocery store weird me out, and this includes my dad.