I’m mad. Like, really f*cking mad. Ok, that’s a lie, I don’t really get mad, I just get sad. So, I’m really f*cking sad. My face was finally getting better, finally looking like something was changing and my face was starting to play nice, but NO. No, no,no. It ain’t playin’ nice no mo’. My face has freaked out. Like OMG Ihateyousomuchjuli. Iwantyoutostaysingleforever. Andidefinitelydontwantanyonetofindyouattractive. Ever.
You, my face, are a straight up b*tch.
Ugh, I’m going to get so many emails about my dirty mouth now. I’ll save you the time…please don’t send them.
Anywho, I’m having one of those days of feeling absolutely hopeless. I don’t know what to do. I clean up my diet and it gets a little bit better, then it goes back to normal. I change up my face cleansing routine and it gets a little better, then goes back to normal. I get off birth control, I stay on birth control. I take fish oil, I don’t take fish oil. I eat more fat, I eat less fat. I don’t eat dark chocolate, I do eat dark chocolate. I get facials, I don’t get facials. You get what I’m throwin’ out? I try everything, but in the end my face has full control, and I am left staring in the mirror with tears in my eyes, choking back the egg of frustration that sits in my throat.
Just today, I started taking the probiotic saccharomyce boulardii which was recommended by Liz of Cave Girl Eats. I also am getting cod liver oil soon to start trying that as well. And making sure all sugar and nuts are cut from my diet. It’s just so annoying that my mind has to be filled with thoughts of how ugly I am or how I wish I could improve my skin. That’s dumb. It should be filled with cookbook thoughts, and Christmas gift thoughts, and food thoughts. But no, the face has won.
So here’s my question out of utter frustration and anguish…do I try acutane? Do I face the fact that I may be incredibly depressed, moody, and upset for months because of the drug? Do I face the fact that I may have to take the drug even though my face and other body parts will literally dry up and peel off? Do I face the fact that it may not even work? I don’t know what to do, but I’m obviously upset enough to blab all about it and want some of your advice. So, advise me.
On a more positive note, you NEED to try these muffins. They are DELICIOUS.
Morning Glory Muffins (nut free option)
- Yield: 9 1x
Ingredients
- 1 apple, peeled and cored, shredded
- 1 large carrot, peeled
- 1/2 cup sunflower seed butter
- 1 cup pepitas
- 3 eggs, whisked
- 1/2 cup coconut oil, melted
- 1/4 cup raisins
- 1/4 cup pecans, roughly chopped (optional for nut free version)
- 1 tablespoon cinnamon
- 1 tablespoon raw honey
- 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
- pinch of salt
Instructions
- Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.
- Now add your pepitas to a small saucepan over medium heat with a tablespoon of fat. I used coconut oil.
- Cook for 3-5 minutes, moving around lots so they don’t burn and so they cook on all sides.
- While your pepitas are roasting, add your apple and carrot to your food processor with the shredding attachment. If you don’t have a food processor, use a grater to shred your apple and carrot.
- Add your apple and carrot to a bowl along with your sunflower seed butter and rinse out your food processor bowl.
- Then add your roasted pepitas to the food processor and puree until you get a flour/meal.
- Then add your pepita flour, eggs, coconut oil, honey, raisins, pecans, cinnamon, salt, and baking soda. Mix well.
- Pour your batter into 9 FULL muffin liners in your muffin tin. I lined my muffins tin with silicone muffin liners but paper would do just fine.
- Bake for 25-30 minutes until cooked through.
- Let cool slightly, but eat warm, because they are the best that way.
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More Nut Free Muffins:
Apple Cinnamon Muffins (nut free)
Chocolate Chip Protein Muffins (nut free)
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Please Juli – do not take Accutane! I took it when I was 22 and really regret the decision. 1) my face is not any better 2) it really screwed up my hormones 3) I am really worried about what effects it might have on my future kids. I know CrossFit people make fun, but Jillian Michael’s book “Master Your Metabolism” (which is a horrible title and really has nothing to do with the content of the book) had an excellent section of how horrible Accutane is for you and why. The damage it inflicts on your natural hormone balance is crazy. Don’t do it!
Also, Proactive is also not going to clear up your skin unless you have very oily skin and acne caused by excess oil and clogged pores. I have very dry and sensitive skin and the combination of benzoyl peroxide and salicylic acid made my skin peel and breakout in a rash.
I found a book a while back called Skin Type Solution which is a bit dated (some product suggestions don’t exist anymore) but it did help me understand my skin better. I found out my acne was caused by too much dryness and thus I needed to simplify my process and the products.
While my skin is far from acne free, it is better when I simplify – Cetaphil clenser, witch hazel as toner, and Nivea Soft moisturizer is what I use.
I was thinking about trying out your oil method??? not worth it?
Juli! Just recently found your blog and I’m lovin it. Just keep swearing it up in here 🙂 I also continue to have problems with my skin regardless of diet, stress, birth control, time of the month, blah blah blah. I started on Solodyn (a mild antibiotic specifically for acne) and things are looking a lot better! Maybe it would be helpful if you’re not ready for something as hardcore as acutane. And just remember you skin always looks worse to yourself than anybody else sees it, good luck!
You mentioned cod liver oil Julie. Have you tried fermented cod liver oil? There’s an amazing blend w/ high vitamin butter oil from Green Pastures – it blows the regular stuff out of the water.
I’ve also known MSM to work with skin issues. If the issue has anything to do with hormones, maybe some hormone balancing assistance (i.e. Maca!) It’s a root that has some incredible benefits.
I would try seeing a naturopath, if you haven’t already. I started seeing mine for allergy issues and it turned out that I had a systemic candida problem. Candida affects your immune system and can manifest itself in many different ways, mine was allergic reactions to all sorts of foods. I worked with her on an elimination diet and some high level probiotics and I am happy to say I am allergy free now! I’m not saying this IS what you have, but if you have a system infection of sorts (ie candida) then it can show through your skin and there are ways of treating it without going to harmful drugs like accutane. It takes a bit of dedication, but it’s worth it. Also with naturopathy, they work with your body chemistry and focus on healing and strengthening it instead of changing the body chemistry (through drugs). I’ve seen some great things come from it.
I hope this is helpful! And I hope you find something that works for you. I haven’t had too many problems with my skin, but I’ve had my fair share of digestive issues and it’s frustrating to feel so helpless against it. Feel free to email me if you have any questions!
Also, I found that when my skin does get off track (sometimes it’s INCREDIBLY dry and rough), I take apple cider vinegar every day. Two tbsp with one tbsp honey, some cinnamon and mix into a glass of water. It’s tolerable (if not tasty sometimes!), and after about a week or so my skin and digestive system gets back to normal. ACV helps balance your body’s PH levels, so I hear.
Anyways, good luck! And let me know if you have any questions about naturopathy!
Victoria
Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re way hot. It’s shocking that you’re single.
Hey girl!! I so feel your pain. I am 43 years old and struggle with this. I never had acne when I was younger. I took accutane and it is serious stuff. My face was clear while taking it but it came back. I was also extremely sore after workouts and it really made a mess of my digestive system. I developed candida, leaky gut, and food intolerances. I was just crying the other day because I try everything as well, no sugar, paleo diet, adding more fats ect. I am now getting hormones tested to figure out what is going on. I seriously can’t take it anymore. I have a photo shoot soon and I just pray I don’t break out. It is always on my mind because a lot of people don’t realize how it messes with your self esteem. I have friends say they don’t even notice but I feel that is all anyone sees. It is awful. Hang in there girl!!
Please don’t get on Acutane! It is so bad for you on so many levels. I totally understand your frustration. I went through all of this too! Proactive (although it worked for a little while), fancy shit from Sephora, Dermatologist creams, OCM, natural products and it all left me with horrible acne. I wanted so bad to be able to use OCM but it just wasn’t working after 2 months of painful acne. So I gave up and went back to what did work and its the remedy at http://www.acne.org. I bought their cleanser, treatment, and moisturizer and also take flush-free niacin (someone mentioned it on an acne blog and it really seems to work, I can tell a difference when I don’t take it) every day and my face is clear. I occasionally have the period pimple or 3 but I’ll take that compared to what I used to experience. Plus, it’s not crazy expensive either. I hope you try it, I really like it.
Completely agree with the acne.org suggestion above! Only thing, out of many many many things (including Proactive), that has helped me. Changed my life. The website provides tutorials of a specific regimen that should be followed. It then recommends over the counter products that can be used to fulfill the regimen (which includes a mild cleanser, lots of benzyl peroxide, a and moisturizer), and then a separate website, http://www.danielkern.com/, also sells products specially formulated for the regimen that I found to work the best. The acne.org site and recommendations are completely free and the owner of the site, Daniel Kern, was an adult acne sufferer who discovered a system that worked for him that he wanted to share with other sufferers. I would highly recommend you check it out and I hope it helps you. Hang in there. Love the recipes and the rants!!
I know exactly what you are going through! I couldn’t pin point the cause of my wrecked forehead for almost a year. I cut so many potential chemical products and allergens from my lifestyle. And finally settled my debate using the oil cleansing method (olive oil & castor oil) and seriously limiting nuts, bananas, avocados, and nut milks…so painful. It didn’t clear up right away, but it slooooowly got better…ugh! Damn latex allergy must have been to blame.
Hey! I love your blog and potty mouth first off. Second, I know exactly how you feel with your skin! I’ve had issues with it for a long time and finally have control over it. I used proactive for awhile and now have control over it with tea tree oil and bare escentuals makeup. However, both my brothers had major skin issues and NOTHING ever worked. They finally went on Acutane and it was the best thing they ever did. They were only on it for 6 months and their faces are completely clear now. They didn’t have any side affects and it’s definitely something you have to be careful with. Do you would make you happy!
I hope you know you are absolutely beautiful, you’re just having a bad day (which I’m sure you already know). I don’t know if you have this problem, but I notice when I’m really stressed out and drinking coffee regularly and eating chocolate I start breaking out too. But I get those really painful zits that not only make you look like shit, but also hurt like a b***h. The combo could be the problem. I’ve also talked to girls that have egg allergies and have not idea and no other symptoms other than just skin issues. When they cut eggs out for a few months their skin clears right up and then they can tolerate them again.
If you’re sick of guessing, you should look up an applied kinesiology doctor. They’re usually a chiropractor. They work with your body on a whole: biochemically, structurally, and emotionally. They basically use your body as it’s own feedback system to figure out what is going on and what your body needs. You should really check that out, every time I’ve had a problem, they fix me right up.