Dreams are so weird. Well, mine are. Since I’m really weird. I had almost a nightmare the other night. Let’s psychological babble this stuff out. Ok, so Laura went out on the town on Saturday night. As did I, BUT I got home by midnight. So I passed out far before she got home. So when I heard her come back in the house, I woke up for a brief second then passed back out. Well I’m guessing this little awakening led me into a frightening dream. Here we go. So I dreamt that Laura came in the house with 5 or 6 friends, I got nervous they would come into my room so I got up, ran to my bedroom door to shut it, then fell head first into my hamper, butt.ass.naked. All her friends saw and stared at my bum and the goods as I flailed around hoping to get out of the hamper. Thank god none of this ever happened.
After all this jazz of a dream occurred, I woke up. And I woke up with a vengeance. I woke up choking. I think I literally scared the air out of myself. Straight up no air into my lungs. I couldn’t breathe. I sounded like a bugel horn. I don’t know what that sounds like. But that’s how I imagine it. Took me about 30 seconds to be able to breathe again. Then I sat there, frightened by the sound of myself, on the end of my bed, wondering what the f*ck just happened.
That story sucked.
I figured something out. Something I kind of already knew. Whole Foods on a Sunday night. OMGhotdudes. I stood in line and pretty much checked the guy out behind me approximately 46 times, none of which he noticed. I suck. I see why all the women in Whole Foods wear heels while at the store. They’re on the prowl. I need to work on what I dress myself in. I had a headband on, with spandex, no makeup, searching for some sort of delicious source of fat. That wasn’t covered in chocolate. I miss you chocolate. Only 3 more weeks.
OMG I’m excited to find out what the 3rd wod is for the CrossFit Open!! Are you?!
Sticky Apple Bars
- Yield: 4-6 1x
Ingredients
Crust
- 12 medjool dates, pits removed
- 1 cup almond butter
- 1/4 cup honey
- 1/4 cup unsweetened shredded coconut
- 1/2 cup coconut butter
- 1 teaspoon cinnamon
- pinch of salt
For the toppings
- 3 apples, cored and thinly sliced
- 3 tablespoons coconut oil
- 1/2 cup walnuts, roughly chopped
- 1/4 cup honey
- 2 tablespoons coconut butter
- pinch of cinnamon
- pinch of salt
Instructions
- First make your crust. Add all ingredients for the crust to a food processor. (you may need to heat up your coconut butter)
- Put crust ingredients in an 8×8 or 9×9 glass baking dish, press down until evenly distributed.
- Now heat up a large skillet under medium heat. Add your coconut oil then your sliced apples.
- Once apples begin to become soft, add your walnuts. Be sure to continuously stir so the apples and walnuts do not burns.
- Once apples are wilted, add your honey and coconut cream concentrate along with cinnamon and salt.
- When all ingredients are incorporated, pour mixture on top of crust and press flat. Put in the fridge to harden for 30-45 minutes.
- Cut into squares and serve!!
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Too Hot for the Oven Yo:
No Bake Chocolate Chip Cream Bars
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Awesome! your my go to for all Paleo food (outside of my standard roast meat, bacon and roast vege, oh and eggs). If it was not for you I would probably not be able to maintain 100% paleo… so cheers!
That’s really awesome to hear Ashley! Glad I can help you stick with your clean diet!
looks super delicious… must make this soon as i am going to go for the Whole 30 and 21 day sugar detox…. must admit.. i really like my (or rather … your) adjusted recipes that make me feel like i dont need sugar and milk chocolate anymore.. but time to get this big butt to be at least a mediocre butt… so i’ll indulge in your scrumptious stuff this week and next week…. it’s game on!!!! Thanks for all of the wonderful food and your creativity… You really are a genius, even if you have wacky dreams!!!! lol.. have a great day J <3
Thanks so much Dannielle! Hope you can try out the recipe soon but stick with the no sugar. I think that’s one of the best thing you can do for yourself! AND I will be writing a post about my thoughts of sugar consumption this week! Stay tuned!
As a newbie to both CrossFit and Paleo, your posts have been IMMENSELY helpful and motivating with the added bonus of making me laugh! THANK YOU!
I wish that I was so creative about food… but until then, I will continue to steal your recipes! Ha 🙂
and when I say steal, I really just mean fool my husband into thinking that I am an amazing cook
Glad I could help out Kate!! Keep working hard!!
Gahhh! Another recipe I want to try but I lack the coconut concentrate to make it. I’ve looked in all my stores–I guess I just need to order it online. This recipe looks awesome.
Do it!! OR make your own!!
I can make my own coconut concentrate? Will I find this in your archives?
Coconut butter:
1 tbsp of coconut oil for each 200-250grams of shredded coconut..
Blend until smooth (Thermomix = ~5 minutes.. Breville = 10-15 mins with breaks so it doesn’t overheat 🙂
Thanks Steve!
I love apples…another masterpiece.
So delish!
If I were 6th in my region I would be stoked for 12.3! Eh never mind, I still am stoked haha…Anyhoo congrats on that!
HA, right, it’s only been 2 wods so it means nothing. But thank you very much David 🙂
I have coconut manna (which i assume is coconut butter) and a creamed coconut in a small box with a vacuum pack I picked up because it looked interesting. Thoughts?
I know exactly what you are talking about and either would work!! Just put them in the microwave to soften up a bit!
These look awesome, I have all the ingredients and I can’t wait to try this! Thanks so much for sharing your creative genius Juli!!! I think with recipes like these I really can go Paleo.
You totally can Barbara!!
Sounds stupendous! Our box is having a Paleo potluck Friday…o which Juli creation to make… sweet potato brownies or the new sticky apple bars?!?! Tough choice. Congrats on 6th place in our region!!! Can’t wait for regionals and watch you compete!
Hmmmm how about both?!?! lol. Thanks so much Carolyn!!
Ahh, coconut cream concentrate has been on backorder on that tropical site for a long time and I can’t find it anywhere else…is that the only place you’ve bought it from?
Try this out Amanda!