Watermelon Jalapeño Margaritas

Happy 4th of July!! I hope you are doing something extra special today and if you are not or you don’t live in the USA so you don’t give AF, that’s totally cool, too. You should still make these margaritas no matter where you are because they are stupid easy and damn delicious! I’m not much of an alcohol person and I did not want to stop drinking these! They are sweet but they come with a little kick at the end that makes the drink just way more fun.

PaleOMG Watermelon Jalapeño Margaritas

The only way I really enjoy a cocktail nowadays is if it has some sort of spice in it. I absolutely love a sweet cocktail but if their is no kick at the end, it just bores me and I end up drinking 2 sips of it. This happened to me twice over the weekend. I tried sangria somewhere – too sweet and crap ass wine. Then I had some sort of drink that had St. Germaine in it – too much laundry detergent taste. So what did I do when we got to our third bar of the night…I ordered peppermint tea. At 11pm, on a rooftop downtown, overlooking the city skyline. And I ordered tea. I can’t explain to you how much sh*t I got for that tea decision. But you know what? Those 4 sips of sh*tty drinks gave me a stomach ache so what the hell else was I suppose to do?!

PaleOMG Watermelon Jalapeño Margaritas

Today, on this lovely sunny 4th of July, we will be heading to the lake to enjoy the sunshine and soak up every bit of my husband’s day off. It’s time to tan, surf, sip and make some memories! The only thing that sucks about lake days is the anxiety. And the anxiety is real. If it’s just me and my husband and a few close friends, I don’t get much anxiety. But as soon as that group grows, the anxiety grows with it. And it’s all because of this damn tattoo I got on my side when I was 21 and dumber than dumb. I just hate when people look at it and I hate explaining it, so that leads to anxiety just thinking about being in a bikini. Sure, I could wear a one piece but I’m not much into those tan lines. And sure, I could get it removed and endure 10-15 brutally painful sessions on my ribcage knowing it will be more painful than actually getting it, but…hell no. So instead, I have to live with my 21 year old self forever. Yet another reason to not have children – they may make even worse tattoo decisions.

Happy 4th of July!

PaleOMG Watermelon Jalapeño Margaritas


Watermelon Jalapeño Margaritas

  • Yield: 6-8 glasses 1x


  • 810 cups diced watermelon
  • 1 cup fresh lime juice (about 810 limes)
  • 3 tablespoons agave nectar (or honey)
  • 2 jalapeños, diced (with seeds) + extra for garnishing
  • 1 cup silver agave tequila (or more, if you prefer!)
  • lime slices, for garnish


  1. Blend watermelon in a high speed blender then strain through a mesh strainer into a glass pitcher.
  2. Then blend together the lime juice, agave and jalapeños and strain once again through a mesh strainer.
  3. Pour lime mixture into the glass pitcher with the watermelon juice then add tequila and mix to combined.
  4. Serve over ice and garnish with fresh lime and jalapeño!

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PaleOMG Watermelon Jalapeño Margaritas

PaleOMG Watermelon Jalapeño Margaritas


More July 4th Cocktails:

PaleOMG Coconut Cream Chili Mango Frozen Margaritas

Coconut Cream Chili Mango Frozen Margaritas

PaleOMG Grilled Pineapple Margaritas

Grilled Pineapple Jalapeño Margaritas

PaleOMG Blueberry Jalapeno Margaritas

Blueberry Jalapeno Margaritas


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Oh, Hi! I’m Juli.

I’m a food hoarder. And a really bad dancer. If you don’t know me well, you will probably not understand my humor. Therefore, I apologize ahead of time. Thanks for listening to my ramblings of my ever-changing life and trusting my kitchen mishaps. Your trust in me is appreciated.


20 thoughts on “Watermelon Jalapeño Margaritas”

  1. Made the blueberry jalapeno margaritas last night, so good! Thank you so much for the recipe!

  2. Happy 4th! These look delightful!

    I have a tattoo on my foot that has a ton of meaning behind it, but because I got it done in my idiot years, I didn’t get it done by anyone good at their job and it’s faded irregularly and looks more like a drunk caterpillar or a lopsided solar system than anything else. How it manages to look like both those things at once is a testament to exactly how shit it is. It’s awesome to explain. I’ve debated getting it removed or covered, but so far I’ve been super lazy because shoes cover it.

  3. Everyone makes silly mistakes when we are young. I have a couple I wish I had gotten done with a better artist, or not at all. Have you thought about getting it covered up? It is not worth living with such anxiety over something so small and changeable. You are such a positive upbeat person, I hate to think that you have to deal with the bear that anxiety is all over a tattoo that is totally re-doable or removable, the laser really does not hurt that badly, especial compared to some of those facial with razors or something that you get that I have read on here lol.

    1. no way. it’s right on my ribs and it was painful getting it, i don’t want to make ANOTHER painful mistake on top of it. and i’ve heard the opposite – that it felt like pouring acid on their skin!

  4. A) I just love the shit out of you and B) since you brought it up, you have to give us a pic of this supposedly awful tattoo. Please!!!!!

  5. I have a few tattoos that I really do like, but they are somewhat abstract so people always feel like they need to ask “what does that mean?”. In my opinion i think its really odd that people, sometimes complete strangers (in my case) will ask me something that could be so personal. So I have a handful of responses I give them, my favorite being “it means I like tattoos”. Usually that gets the point across and they let it go.

    1. So gooooood!!! I didn’t even strain it and we love it.
      Bonus, made these on your due date! Thinking about you guys ❤️

  6. Wowza!!! I doubled everything except the jalapeno and it was still too spicy for me, LOL. I’m a wuss. I added more lime juice to balance it out. Great taste, but I think next time I’ll only use one jalapeno!

  7. I have 2 tattoos on my back that I 100% hate and regret. First one I got when I was 18 because I was 18 and could (stupid Chinese symbol that means who the hell knows what) and then another when I was drunk on the beach. My younger self was the worst.

    Anyway, just chopped up a shit ton of watermelon yesterday so I’m definitely giving this a try!

  8. I am not a fan of tequila but otherwise these sound amazing! Do you think vodka would be a good alternative?

  9. This recipe was great! Refreshing and delicious! I made them for a group of people and I had to make a second batch because I ran out!

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