As I start to type out this post, I really don’t even know where to start. But ever since I started talking more and more about working out LESS and seeing better results from it, I’ve been getting flooded with questions on social media. And the more I’ve shared old photos from when I was working out NONSTOP to now (working out 3x per week), the more interest I’ve seen in this topic. So today I wanted to share my own experience with exercise addiction and the issues I ran into because of it. We live in a world where MORE is better. More money, more things, more likes. We want more more more. So in my early 20s, when I still had so much to learn, I always thought more exercise meant more results. More hours in the gym meant I would finally see the results I had always hoped for. But man was I dead wrong.
When I was 21 I started doing CrossFit and it changed my life forever. Not only did I finally meet a community that I felt part of, but I found a new purpose. A purpose that didn’t include obsessing over my own weight. Instead I began obsessing over the weight I could put on the barbell, or getting my first pull up, or running my fastest mile. I had a new purpose that impacted me so deeply that I was never the same. And I took that obsession very seriously and began training twice a day and competing in CrossFit competitions every other weekend. For the first time in my life I wasn’t obsessing about my weight, I felt this new excitement to workout every day, and I was actually losing weight without thinking about it…all while constantly seeing improvements to my fitness. I was hooked!
But that’s where addiction begins – you get hooked and you never want to stop. I thought to myself, “Well, working out once a day has gotten me this far….what about 2x a day? Even better, 3x?” And my addiction took over. At this point, I was 22-23 and working in multiple CrossFit gyms so I would spend my time between classes working out with friends. A friend would want to work out, I would say yes, then it would happen at another gym. And since my whole goal was to make it to CrossFit Regionals and hopefully the CrossFit Games, I kept this behavior up because it kept me beating people in the gym week after week.
But what I didn’t understand was why I looked so extremely puffy. And it was something I really struggled with because all my friends would tell me I was crazy when I said this. It was such a mindfuck – I would look in the mirror and not recognize the person looking back yet everyone I trusted said I was wrong when I mentioned my weight. Yet I was 30lbs heavier and extremely uncomfortable in my body. So I really didn’t know what to do. I wanted to work out all the time because I was addicted and I wanted to compete, but I also wanted to feel like myself. So what did I do? I worked out more like running 5 miles on my rest days or completing rower sprints for time. I continued to work out MORE and began eating LESS because I thought that would decrease my constant bloating throughout my body. But the eating less just led to binging and the constant working out led to more inflammation in my body. I was lost, simply lost.
It wasn’t until I learned about inflammation and stress on the body. I don’t know if it was something I read or something someone said to me, but something finally clicked. I finally learned about cortisol and how it affects our bodies. Cortisol is the stress hormone that is released when you are ‘fight or flight’ mode. Now if you’ve ever done CrossFit, you know that every workout is fight or flight. You go to the gym anxious about the workout, you’re sweating before it starts, and then it’s GO TIME when the buzzer counts down. So when I was working out 2-4x per day, I was constantly releasing cortisol. And this constant release of cortisol can lead to a bunch of different health problems, including weight gain. Then pair this with the constant workouts that included lifting extremely heavy weights, sprinting, and exerting as much energy as possible…well that led to extreme inflammation. My inflammation showed itself through injuries during workouts, poor sleep, extreme cystic acne, and edema. I was swollen everywhere.
So one day when I was looking in the mirror and seeing the same face I hadn’t recognized for years, I finally said fuck it. Fuck.this.shit. If I was working out MORE and seeing LESS results, why not try the complete opposite? Instead of working out 2x/day with no true rest days, I started to work out 5x/week with 2 REAL rest days. Rest days that didn’t include a 5 mile run or rower sprints….rest days that included nothing but rest. When I started this, I HATED it. I felt deep in my heart that there was no way I could still see results from working out 5x per week instead of 21x or more. But I continued to remind myself what Einstein said, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.” So I stopped doing the same shit over and over, and stuck with my plan – workout less and see how it goes.
And guess what? My cystic acne decreased, my edema and constant swelling decreased, I slept better, I felt better, and my workouts were better. Sure, I wasn’t as strong because that wasn’t my goal at that time, but my life was all around better. But to be clear, this took a while. It took me 3 years to lose 30lbs. And this took that long because I really took my time getting to know my body. I didn’t count calories or macros, I didn’t obsess about what I was eating, and I didn’t worry about missing a workout. I LISTENED to my body and what it was needing – if I was craving french fries, I had french fries. If I wanted pancakes, I made pancakes. If I wasn’t craving those things, I ate my normal veggies-and-meat meal. And when I was full, I stopped. When I stopped restricting, my binging behaviors subsided.
As the 3 years went by, I was able to really get to know what my body needed. If it needed more food, less food, heavier workouts, or no workouts at all. 3 years may sound like a long time if you’re a person who is looking to lose weight, but those 3 years taught me so much and those healthy behaviors have been able to continually grow over time. And because of that, I can see how my body reacts to certain foods and certain workouts. I’ve stuck with working out 5x/week for years now and it’s worked really great, but since I started working with a trainer who gives me more intense workouts, I’ve needed to cut back. And I knew that because I’ve taken the time to get to know my body. When I started working with the trainer while still doing my normal workouts, I could see that inflammation creep back in. My thighs started to get a bit puffy and I was feeling more sore than usual. So what did I do? I cut back. I cut back to working out only 3x per week…and I felt scared AF to do that because I didn’t want to slow down my progress. But just like I did in 2012, I reminded myself to trust the process and LISTEN to my body. It’s been a month of working out only 3x/week and all my strength numbers have increased all without seeing signs of inflammation.
I don’t know if you’ll connect to this story in any capacity, but I hope it resonates with at least a few people. I felt so lost during those years and I never had a coach to lead me in the right direction or question the amount of time I was spending in the gym. I never had a coach mention inflammation or cortisol or even exercise addiction. All I had was myself and my gut, and I’m sure AF glad I listened to it. If you take anything from this long ass post, I hope it’s understanding that more isn’t MORE. You don’t have to do hours of cardio or lift the heaviest weights or push yourself to puking to simply get results. You just don’t. It took me years to learn that and I hope that this post helps someone before they go down the same difficult path. More isn’t better, it’s just not. And if you’re afraid to reduce your exercise because you think you won’t continue to progress, I’m here to remind you that it is possible! All you gotta do is trust the process.
If you have any questions, please leave them in the comments section below. I tried to touch on everything people have asked me on instagram, but I may have missed some things. Let me know and I’m happy to answer anything that I can based off my own experience!
Juli! Thanks so much for writing this post. Looking back on my journey I see that this is what I was doing to myself just before getting pregnant with my first child. I wonder sometimes if that’s what was really causing my hypertension (despite good eating habits). In this postpartum period I’ve been hard on myself and thinking that I needed to do more but my body has been begging to do less. So I’m going to try 3 days a week and see how that feels and if this inflammation finally subsides because right now it looks like I’ve been doing nothing but eating ho-hos even though I’ve been busting my ass for months.
Would you be willing to elaborate on intuitive eating? How did you start this and know what your body ‘needed?
I just want to say,Thank You for this post! I’ve been obsessive about CrossFit for a few years now and I’ve felt like I need a change. I’ve had a few injuries during this time and I’m just ready to not have to go all out 6 days a week. This makes it seem a lot less scary to quit and do something else.
It’s ironic I came across this post… 6 years and three babies ago I was a huge Paleo and CrossFit junkie (I read your blog way back when). I’ve been intuitively eating and working out when I can during the past 6 years… Today after a PMS binge fest of Paleo Chocolate Chip cookies I told myself I’m going to get back to the strict Paleo/CrossFit lifestyle, but honestly after reading this I think I’m good where I’m at. Lol I workout 5 days a week. I eat what most would consider “healthy” it’s just feeling like a crack addict around any sweets for me. I hate that loss of control, but I should probably cut back on the cannabis too. Any suggestions for getting rid of the sugar cravings would be much appreciated. I don’t feel like I should binge or deprive myself it’s just finding that balance. I look good, and I feel healthy and strong just like my dark chocolate.
I,be done CrossFit for over 2 yrs and lost close to 30lbs but had to stop because of the weight lifting was killing me could,t get the bar over my head even with 2&1/2 weights on it so now I’m looking at going to a regular gym to try other things.
i think it’s always important to mix things up and see what works and what doesn’t!
Omg me tooooooo!!!
I can’t see all the comments but how long are your workout sessions now? Are you doing full body with complexes? Any cardio?
I’m in the same boat as Grace – I’ve spent the last 2 years post-baby working out insanely hard 6-7 days a week and trying to eat well. I’ve lost 15 lbs but hit a lot of plateaus and not lost the 25+ lbs that I need to get back to my pre-baby happy weight. I am so ready to sleep better and feel better and not feel crushed by trying so hard with minimal results. I am going to commit to lifting weights 3-4x a week with 3 real REST days (other than, you know, caring for a puppy and a toddler and lots of walks with them).
Your blog is spot on. I was only addicted to CrossFit for a few years and ultimately pushed through pain because I began processing the intensity as a mental game of toughness and perseverance through pain vs listening to my body. I also gained an additional 15 pounds that everyone would say was muscle but when I looked in the mirror all I saw and felt was inflammation. My last ever CrossFit class required a mile run at the end and I ended up tearing my calf muscle but continuing to run because I had convinced myself that mental toughness against pain was something earned. Here I sit a few years later looking at a knee cap replacement due to early onset arthritis, bone on bone pain, and I’m 39 years old. I wish I would have listened to my body and I hope this blog post inspires others to look through a different lens. Thank you for this post, in hopes that it resonates with your readers because it’s so real.
oh man, i hope others read your comment, Katie. such proof that we need to learn to listen to our bodies. and it’s so hard in an environment with a coach telling you to go harder and faster, and you don’t want to let them down! i hope you continue to heal, i’m so sorry you’re going through that!
Very interesting post. Do you think this could apply to work? I walk, on average, between 10,000 and 18,000 steps five days a week for my job. I work full time in the parcels section at the post office, so in addition to the walking, I am lifting parcels of all shapes, sizes and weights. I definitely have inflammation, and had put it down to food intolerance, thinking I move a lot at work, so it has to be the food. I feel like since I move around so much, I must have to try harder to be very strict, but it is not coming easy. Although even knowing it could be work, in addition to my diet, it is not going to help because it is not so easy to just up and change to a different position. 🙁
I’m so glad I read this post. I have been addicted to the amount of calories I burn with each workout. I’ve been working out with a trainer since September 2019 3 x per week plus adding hour long spin classes or skating and additional 3 x per week. I’ve gained 21 lbs over the past year. Covid shutdown didn’t help but in the past few months I’ve suffered through what I’m sure is a miniscus tear and a pulled groin muscle, yet I continue to work out daily because I’m obsessed with the stats on my Garmin. When I had gained weight in the past it used to distribute evenly. Now it all goes to my middle. I recently found out I have celiac disease. Some of the bread substitutes cause me painful bloating and cramps. I’ve realized just because Oreo’s have a gluten free option, it doesn’t mean my body will process it well. Thanks for the information. I think I need to switch my focus from the calorie burn to my diet.
This post really hit home for me and i think i need to start taking your advice i am working out ao much with no real rest days and i am not seeing the resukts i want! I am always so focused on calories that i get so side tracked! I eat very healthy ao i get scared i wont aee resukts without the extra calorie burn.
sometimes i think that the cortisol released from simply stressing over food and exercise actually leads to more issues than it actually helps. sounds like it may be time to relax a bit with the food and exercise and see how that goes!
This is me! For 10 years I’ve been dealing with shitty adult acne, poor digestion, joint pain and my legs would swell after workouts. So at the beginning of 2020 I decided that my 40 year old body could NOT do the draining Hiit workouts anymore and I had to switch things up. I found Barre, have added in pilates and some dumbbell workouts and things are SO much better. No more massive breakouts, less joint pain and better digestion. So I’d say that’s a win, win, win! 😉
amazing!! good for you, Jenn!
Hi Juli! I am one who has followed you for years and saw the changes in you, and wondered how that happened! I so relate to exercise addiction…and am still stuck in the fear that if I change, I will gain a load of weight. It doesn’t help that I am an ER nurse(cortisol!), work night shift (cortisol!) and am doing multiple workouts many days including CrossFit and running (marathon in May🥴)…all this to say THANK YOU for always sharing, being open and encouraging. I really appreciate you, and am going to think through making some changes…
I’m right there with you. I hit 40 and just said to myself, “I’m so damn tired of being tired.” I do a hiit workout max, 1-2x a week otherwise it’s just a plain old full body lift. If I start feeling run down, I rest until I feel better. 🙌🏻
My people!!! I’m 41 and after years of obsessing about fitness (I come from a family of large people and it scares me that I have that in my DNA) I’m realizing that I truly have an addiction. Part of it is vanity and the other part of it is stress management. I have a stressful job and I love the “exhausted” feeling I get after a good sweat as I don’t have the energy to stress about work or kids BUT I’ve also given myself Hashimotos in the process and it is very taxing on my creaky joints. Also, I find that my apple watch (while I love it) also reminds me about how “lazy” I am being on my rest days. I’m so goal oriented that I can’t stand not closing all my rings each day and I refuse to reduce my goals. Such a vicious cycle:( Thank you for this Juli. i am definitely still on the journey but this helps!
Yes! I totally think my apple watch contributes to these issues. I keep trying to talk myself into not wearing it but haven’t been able to, which is probably even more of an indication that I need to take it off.
Thank you for this post on exercise addiction. I, too, have been there. I started running in my 20’s (I am 43 now) with the goal of running the Bolder Boulder (which I have run 17 times). I then started doing triathlons. When I was 32 I went through some challenges in my personal life and poured myself into racing. The first season I did my first Olympic distance, then my first 1/2 marathon. I just kept increasing. I would swim in the morning, then run in the afternoon. I was also having trouble eating and being restrictive (I lost 25lbs in a month). Fast forward a couple of years and after doing a 1/2 Ironman and two 1/2 marathons within 2 months my body started failing (surprising, I know). I was gaining weight, irritable, and would just push more. Long story, long, the strain on my adrenals lead to Hashimoto’s disease of the thyroid. I then was advised to stop running all together (which made me have full on panic attacks) so I started Crossfit because I am smart like that. It has taken me several years, but now I like light strength training (maybe 2x/wk), and moderate cardio-right now cross country skiing because we live in the mountains. The road to recovery is long. I now rest when I need to, and some weeks that might be 3 full days. I have had thyroid disease for 8 years, and I am constantly working to keep that under control.
You sound just like me. I too have Hashimotos due to a long history of over exercising and underrating and feel like my body is full of inflammation. Switched to lifting and walking but it’s not helping much. Trying to get myself to understand that I really need to rest more to heal my hormones
exactly what you said – road to recovery is LONG. it takes quite a while to get to know your body again after you’ve been telling it a completely different story for so many years. glad you’re finding a new happy balance in your own fitness!!
I’m used to working out 6x/ week. About 3 weeks ago I had spinal surgery. Decompression and Fusion. Needless to say, I can workout for at least another 9 weeks. I knew this going I to surgery, but it’s still tough. I was counting macros and meticulous about everything I put in my mouth. I have MS ( very asymptomatic ) and I do take medicine for it. I felt like counting macros let me control what went into my body even when I couldn’t control what was going on inside.
You know what? This time off has been great. It’s definitely hard to not go to the gym and I’m right outside of Philly, so it’s pretty cold to walk outside, but I’ve actually seen my body changing for the better. I’m 53 and I haven’t gained weight, which is what I thought would happen. No counting except for protein and just enjoying life!
Your post really solidified what I was thinking. Sometimes you just need to scale it back a little. I don’t think I’ll go back to 6x/ week workouts. Maybe 3 or 4.
Thank you so much for your posts. I
You are terrific and truly make a difference. 😊
this is amazing, Kayla!! so happy for you and for what you’re experiencing. rest is so incredibly important and I wish trainers and coaches would stress this more. people who have surgeries or something else that pulls them away from the gym often experience this and I’m so glad you’re recognizing it. I hope you heal up and you’re back to enjoying workouts without overdoing it! thank you for the kind words, Kayla!!
Oops… obviously I meant I CAN’T workout for another 9 weeks.
This is so helpful!! Thank you! Can you give any advice – I know you recently did a blog post about not drinking and not making alcohol a big deal. But, I have been so restrictive for so many years, I want to not feel guilty about having a glass of wine with my husband in evenings. I am afraid I won’t reach my fitness goals if I do that, but it leads to me wanting to eat other food since it feels like I can’t have wine. Thank you!
That’s definitely a balancing act. If you have certain goals and that glass of wine doesn’t help you hit those goals, then you gotta find that balance of enjoying that wine some nights and not others. If you enjoy wine, enjoy that wine!! It doesn’t have to be an all or nothing thing – have a glass some nights and drink water others.
Wow .. thank you! I am 37 yo and my husband was diagnosed with a terminal illness 2 years ago and we have 2 small kids. Prior to his diagnosis, I had lost 78 lbs on WW. After his diagnosis, in 7 months i gained 70 lbs back and discovered I developed a severe binge eating disorder from the trauma (as well as food restriction). I have done a lot of research on intuitive eating and am doing a good job so far! I have been riding my peleton, every day, for the past 2.5 months for 45 min and pushing really hard. I have become EXTREMELY disappointed bc, though eating healthy, the weight isn’t coming off. At all. Knowing I am working so hard with so much weight to lose is so deflating. It has been pushing me over the edge of starting binge episodes again, though I have stayed strong so far. I will try giving myself a break and see what happens. Also, after my husband was diagnosed, we did a lot of research for him on how to best prolong his life (not curable) and the paleo diet by was recommended to help slow onset. We then discovered your page and learned so much more through you!!! So thank you!!! The only thing he can control is his diet and that makes him feel pretty powerful against the disease. Thank you for the energy you put in your page.. people are listening and people find hope. I know that bc we are two of them! 🙏
Thank you SO much for this post!! I’ve followed you for over 8 years now. I’ve had several gut and inflammation issues, adrenal fatigue, etc. I didn’t want to believe that something that I loved and was a significant part of my life was one of the main reasons for all of that. I had to get there in my own time. But I’m finally ready to walk away and try something new. I enjoy your programming and am excited to try something different. Hopefully, I will love it even more than I loved CrossFit years ago. I do have a question around eating: it stresses me out to track my macros but I also under eat quite a bit, especially with protein. I’ve been tracking again but it’s tough to force myself to eat more when I’m not hungry. How did you do it? Should this be a slow process? Thank you again for writing this, it 100% resonated with me, as I’m sure it did with many others. Thanks for being so awesome!
I just added in more protein snacks throughout the day at first and found that I was able to hit those numbers pretty quickly without feeling overly full or sick of food! But you can definitely start slow and work your way up. No need to jump 100% in, that often leads to failure anyways. Take your time and just try to add 5-10g per day or even per week!
I did high intensity as well just recently bought your power program and moving away from the high intensity. Praying it helps my inflammation. When did u start seeing less inflammation after you stopped the high intensity workouts?
i hope it does, too!! i honestly don’t remember, but it was probably 3-6 months to start seeing that inflammation and puffiness decrease