Like my ball hugging picture? Haha, ball hugger.
You may have noticed last week I decided to not post anything new. I had to take a break from it all. And in all honesty, I need to work on my newest cookbook. That thing ain’t gonna write itself. But back to my first point, sometimes you need to take a step back from the internet. There are trolls, gremlins and just straight up unhappy people on that thing. And those creatures can really drag ya down if you hear them too much. Last week, I heard one too many of them so I decided to take a step back, eat food in privacy and spend hours typing up recipes for the cookbook instead.
You see, I had somewhat of an incident occur the other day, last Saturday night. I took part in a Friendsgiving. Not just any Friendsgiving, a Friendsgiving filled with around 40 people, 5 dogs and children. Oh yeah, and a donkey piñata. We also dressed up for this Friendsgiving. There were pilgrims, Indians, turkeys, a sombrero, a baseball player and yes, a piñata. Similar to what I did in elementary school years and years ago. That night, I took a really terrible picture in a dark lit room of a plate filled with beige (yet delicious) Thanksgiving food along with a very dim picture of the 40 people sitting at the table together. Seriously, the picture was really bad. Before I knew it, I had people up my ass about this picture. They called me a racist, a bad person, they said they were unfollowing me, they sent me links to websites about genocide and I was even asked to publicly apologize. I actually had to take the picture down because there was such hair-ripping-out conversations going on.
But here’s the thing, I wore a turkey hat. I wasn’t a pilgrim, I wasn’t an Indian, I wasn’t a piñata. I was a turkey. And just FYI, I looked reaaaaally good in this turkey hat. Turkeys just make me feel sexy. Can’t apologize for that business. And I paid a good $13 for that hat, so I will be wearing it again some day. Maybe for a Fashion Friday. Wanna see?
Dayuuuuuum. Just my color. And the most comfortable hat I’ve ever worn. For reals. There were also turkeys in this group. Look at these wild ones.
But since people seemed offended even though I was just a turkey, I’m going to apologize right now: To all the turkeys out there – organic, natural, kosher, free range, deep fried, thinly sliced, buttered, honey roasted, smoked, not-organic, hormone-added, and any other kind of turkey hopping around out there –I’m sorry for any offense that was taken. My intention was not to offend, just to have fun. Have fun being a turkey, have fun hanging out with my wonderful friends, and have fun stuffing my face with the heaviest food possible. And alcohol. And I succeeded.
Now that all of that stuff is settled, let’s back to some regularity here on PaleOMG. I mean, paleo makes you regular so PaleOMG should be regular too. Ok, back to reality. Life is going as usual here in Colorado since I haven’t been traveling. I’ve been working out regularly, eating normally and working away. The only thing that I’ve noticed a change in since I did my last, terrible competition, is that I don’t feel like trying quite as hard at the gym. I think I’m just going through a slump because I just hated that day so much, but I’m still trying to workout regularly while just staying lighter in my weights. I find workouts more enjoyable when the weights are lighter. That way I finish the workout quicker. Meaning I’m happier. So let’s check out some of the light weight I’ve been using lately.
Sunday – Rest day b*tches!
Monday – If you want your legs to be painful to the touch for at least 4 days after the workout, this is the perfect workout for you! I want so effing sore. The kind of sore that makes you feel like you have restless leg syndrome even though you’re not exactly sure what that is. At one point, I couldn’t sleep because of how sore I was. But man will my legs look better next swimsuit season. *finger crossed*
Back Squats: 3 reps every 90 sec for 7 sets. All sets at 80% – I used 135#
Strict HSPU: 30 sec work / 30 sec rest for 5 sets. (total reps) – I used an ab mat with a 5# plate underneath and got 47 reps total
2 x 4 min AMRAP Of: (2 min rest in between)
15 Jumping Squats (20/14# med ball. Hold with a bear hug)
12 hand release push ups
15 KB Swings (70/55) – I used 45#
I got 5 round + 21 reps
Tuesday – I LOVED this workout. It was fun trying to beat my first time during the second part of the workout. I probably should have gone heavier but then I wouldn’t have finished as quickly and I wouldn’t have been as happy! Positive reinforcement, duh. Speaking of positive reinforcement, I may have gotten frozen yogurt with the boyfriend after this workout. Because I needed it while watching The Mindy Project. And because sugar is best consumed after a workout. Yeah, that was totally my intention.
Every minute on the minute for 12: 1 Power Clean into 1 Split Jerk –
min 0-2 @ 70%
min 3-5 @ 80%
min 6-8 @ 85%
min 9-12 @ 90% – I finished with 115#
For Total Time:
12-9-6-3 reps of:
Power Cleans (165/115) – I used 85#
Burpee Box Jumps (24/20)
REST 3 mins THEN
3-6-9-12 reps of:
Push Jerks (165/115) – I used 85#
Burpee Box Jumps (24/20)
I finished in 12:22
Wednesday – I really hated this workout until the next morning when I found out my rest day was on a day that included thrusters. Then this workout became wonderful. A long time ago, I hyperextended my elbow while doing a heavy 5 rep max of overhead squats. It’s never been the same since then. It rotates back and I look double jointed. Not a good look. So this workout was mostly challenging because it was pretty painful. Stupid elbow.
Find a challenging combo of: Snatch Deadlift into Hang Power Snatch into Hang Snatch into OH Squat. ( 12 mins) – I got to 100#
For Time:
1000m / 900m Row
30 overhead squats (115/75)
150 Double Unders ( no more than 3 mins worth)
30 overhead squats (115/75)
800M Run
I finished in 17:10 Rx
Thursday – Rest day pumpkin!
Friday – Loved this workout! Who doesn’t love sore abs?
Strict Press: 2-2-2 Adding – I got to 95#
Push Press: 2-2-2 Adding – I got to 115#
(12 mins)
5 Rounds For Total Time Of:
200m Sprint
6 Strict handstand push ups
9 Power Snatch (135/95) – I used 75#
12 Toes To Bar
REST 1 min between rounds.
I finished in 20:09
Saturday – I went light in this workout and so happy I did. For me, I get way more sore when I stay light with weight, especially deadlifts. Light deadlifts makes me 10x more sore than heavy ones. And personally, I like being sore. Then I feel like this whole workout thing is worth my time.
800 m run
5 rounds:
15 deadlift (225,155) – I used 115#
15 hand release push ups
800 m run
I finished in 16:22
As T Swift would say, “haters gonna hate hate hate… shake it off and let it go”…. oh wait, Elsa said that
You are awesome and I love your blog! Any time I have a friend trying paleo you are the first website I tell them about. Your food is wonderful!
F#ck the haters that don’t have a sense of humor and take personal offense to everything. Their lives must suck really bad to get up in arms about trivial stuff. Those people are idiots.
i love when you post your workouts!! i always try them at home since i have a lot of room. i did your “tuesday workout” this morning and i wanted to kill myself. box jumps are my least favorite thing in the world but i force myself to do them in a workout once a week. i wanted to die after each round of cleans only to have to do those shitty box jumps. haha i better feel it tomorrow!
what they all said ^^^^^^. people are douche nozzles and say dumb shit. you’re kind of a celebrity these days and as some hip-hop song may or may not say, “haters gon’ hate.”
Oh man do I sympathize JB. I feel like when people become all consumed with any one activity, whether it be ranting on the comment boards of a blog or bitching and moaning to a CrossFit affiliate owner. They suck the life out of people and kill passion….a sad state of affairs for those just trying to enjoy what they’ve created.
They are the total worst, TJ. People hate when other people are happy and doing what they love
Hey Juli, just want to say I follow your blog and eat your recipes here and there and I find you hilarious! Please keep being yourself- haters are always gonna hate. And also, don’t be down on yourself for 1 bad competition. I know how that feels- I’m actually not into crossfit anymore but have been obsessed for years with a cycling sport called cyclocross. And have had a terrible year. I raced poorly, but halfway through the season realized I still loved it and wanted to be there and just let go of trying to be “serious” or “compete”. It’s just not where my body is at right now. Just keep on doing what you love girl, and then you can make your move when you’re really ready.
Juli – I LOVE reading your posts – the most human posts ever !
People can be douche bags – I don’t believe you owe anyone an apology. It was your personal affair with family and friends.
You were not protesting anything – what jerks.
Keep posting – I’ll keep reading. Even if you wear a Turkey hat and feathers.
Juli- I am new to your cookbooks and blog and think they are great. I am glad to see so many coming to your defense.
Regarding history anyone who cites genocide and all this other nonsense have never studied history. As the saying goes, “You are entitled to your own opinion, but you are not entitled to your own facts” They biased read opinions based on someone’s personal slant and adopt them as truth.
Yes, the whites did some awful things to the Indian’s but the Indian perpetuated atrocities that were equally bad and in many ways worse, on each other and the whites. The Indians hatred among themselves is to the same degree we see in the Middle East today among ISIS and the various Muslim sects. They couldn’t even come together to fight off the whites because they hated each other as much as they hated the whites. One Indian tribe would completely wipe another Indian tripe off the face of the planet and enslave anyone they chose to spare.
Yes, in the end the Indians were a conquered people but much of their demise was at their own hands.
I never saw the thanksgiving photo and I am sorry you were accused of so many things. I have not posted in awhile since we moved back to Saudi Arabia from Colorado. I enjoy your blog and your receipes. Your workouts inspire me to get off my butt because I love food. Thank you for your creativity and sharing your passions. As 2015 comes upon us vow to keep on truckin on with your awesome self.